The Orphan Spirit

Scripture taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version. Copyright ©1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of

Zondervan Publishing House. All rights reserved.

The Orphan Spirit

On that day you will realize that I am in my Father, and you are in me and I am in you. John 16:20

The Orphan Spirit

What do orphans look like? • Someone who is doing all the time. Performers are rarely seen as lazy. They are critical of others who don’t do their fair share (for Jesus).

The Orphan Spirit

What do orphans look like? • Perfectionists. They tell others off

for not “doing it” right. They are angry below the surface. They must succeed – they are driven to win at everything.

The Orphan Spirit

What do orphans look like? • Someone who can’t receive

compliments well, but who need affirmation. You often feel guilty around them; that you should have done more.

The Orphan Spirit

What do orphans look like? • They are never wrong – it is always someone else’s fault. They can’t receive a rebuke or criticism. They respond by pointing out your faults (which are always worse).

The Orphan Spirit

What do orphans look like? • They are poised in public, their best face is seen outside the home. They have to look good. They are good at fooling people about who they really are. They can’t be real.

The Orphan Spirit

What do orphans look like? • They aren’t spontaneous and don’t like when rules change. They like boundaries and want to know the rules of engagement. They find it hard to relax and let loose.

The Orphan Spirit

What do orphans look like? • They are lonely. No one under-stands them. They don’t open their hearts up easily. They have to protect themselves from others knowing who they really are.

The Orphan Spirit

What do orphans look like? • They are usually tired. They need

to keep working harder to get more love. They laugh only to cover mistakes.

The Orphan Spirit

What jobs to orphans gravitate to? • Pastors• CEO’s of business/commerce• Care providers• Roles where I can “get

significance and attention”

The Orphan Spirit

What are the causes?• Lack of touch as a child• No affirmation growing up• Life was hard, serious, tough• Don’t know unconditional love

The Orphan Spirit

What are the spiritual roots?• Fear – they are afraid that if

people really knew what they are like, that they would reject them.

The Orphan Spirit

What are the spiritual roots?• Shame – I have to cover my flaws

otherwise I will lose respect from those around me.

The Orphan Spirit

What are the spiritual roots?• Control – I have to cover my back

otherwise I will be found out. I have to become someone I’m not.

The Orphan Spirit

Adam answered, “I heard you in the garden, and I was afraid (fear) because I was naked (shame); so I hid (control).” Genesis 3:10

The Orphan Spirit

The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. But he answered his father, ‘Look! All these years I’ve been slaving for you and never disobeyed your

The Orphan Spirit

orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!’ Luke 15:28-30

The Orphan Spirit

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. Matthew 11:28-30

The Orphan Spirit

For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the Spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba Father”. Romans 8:15

The Orphan Spirit

On that day you will realize that I am in my Father, and you are in me and I am in you. John 16:20