The Mysterious Suitcase

8/7/2019 The Mysterious Suitcase

1/16

The Mysterious SuitcaseA Ten-Minute Play

by

Natalya Churlyaeva

Natalya ChurlyaevaKolomenskaya 12/42Krasnoyarsk, Russia

[email protected]

The Mysterious Suitcase by Natalya Churlyaeva


2/16

CHARACTERS

ANGELA and DANIEL: a young couple in their twenties.



3/16

SETTING

The action takes place in the apartment of Daniels recently-deceasedgrandfather.

TIME

The present.



4/16

1

As the curtain rises, ANGELA and DANIEL entera messy room.

ANGELA(Looks around with disgust.)

Dan, your grandpa was such a pig!DANIEL

If youve lived as long as he had, you would become one too.

ANGELAOh no, Ill never be like him.

DANIELWell, youll be like your mother then.

ANGELAThat wouldnt be too bad.

DANIEL(Starts to clean the table.)

What wouldnt be too bad?

ANGELATo be like Mother when Im her age.

DANIEL

Youre already like your mother.

ANGELAAre you saying that I look like a woman in her fifties?

DANIELDoes it really matter what you look like?

ANGELA(Starts looking into the mirror on the wall.)

Matters a lot. If I look good, the whole world would be at my feet.

DANIELThe whole world isnt at your feet, its right under your nose... Wontyou stop twisting and turning in front of the mirror? Better help meclean up the room.

ANGELAAnd ruin my manicure?



5/16

2

DANIELWhy did you go after me then?

ANGELA

Just want to see the place youve inherited.(Starts to walk around peeking into wardrobes, shelves, corners,etc.)

DANIELWhat are you looking for?

ANGELAAntiques.

DANIEL

Ha! Grandpa himself was an antique.

ANGELAStill, we cant sell him, especially since hes already underground. But,we can sell his mementoes.

DANIELWhat mementoes?

ANGELAWell, for example, his decorations. We can get quite a bit just selling

his orders and medals.

DANIELI wont sell Grandpas awards.

ANGELAI can do it.

DANIELIf you want to, sell those of your own grandpa.

ANGELAI have no grandpa. You know that.

DANIELYoure unique. Everybody has two grandpas, but you have none.

ANGELA



6/16

3

Alas, how could I if my mother grew up without a father, and the samewith me? So, Ive only a grandma.

DANIELI know your grandma. A real piranha.

ANGELAShes not a piranha, shes a shark. Like Mother.

DANIELYour mother has no guts to be a shark.

ANGELAYou dont know her. First she swallows a man, and then spits outwhats left of him.

DANIELLike her last lover?

ANGELAThat one turned out to be too hard for her. His car alone is worth yourgrandpas apartment.

(A vague buzz, like a phone ringing, is heard.)

ANGELA (contd)Oh! Somebodys calling!

DANIELIndeed, more like a buzz... Strange sound.

ANGELAYoure right. Sounds like one of those old-style phones.

(Looks around.)Where is it coming from?

DANIEL(Looks around.)

Strange... Cant see it anywhere.

ANGELA(Starts to listen, trying to trace the sound, but the buzz hasstopped.)

It stopped.

DANIEL



7/16

4

Never mind.(Starts tidying up a bookshelf.)

What shall we do with Grandpas books?

ANGELA

Chuck them. Who needs books these days.

DANIELMaybe we can sell them?

ANGELAIf theyre paperbacks, then its useless.

(Looks over things in a big wardrobe.)This is garbage too...though not all...some can be sold.

DANIEL

(Approaches and peers into the wardrobe.)And this we can even donate to our local theater.

(Pulls out a big and heavy black suitcase.)

ANGELANo charity, the suitcase can be sold too.

(The buzz starts again from inside the suitcase.)

DANIELOh! So thats whats ringing!

ANGELACant be! A suitcase cant ring like a phone!

DANIEL(Puts his ear to the suitcase.)

Not the suitcase. Its something inside it.(Tries unsuccessfully to open the suitcase.)

ANGELAWell?

DANIELWont budge.

ANGELALet me try.

DANIEL



8/16

5

(Pushes the suitcase to ANGELA.)Please.

ANGELA(First calmly and then more and more feverishly fiddles with the

lock while the suitcase buzzes loudly but stays closed. Finallyhits the suitcase furiously.)Shut up!

(The ringing stops.)

DANIELSeems like it follows your command.

ANGELAWho?

DANIELDont know... Either the suitcase or something inside it.

(The suitcase starts ringing again.)

ANGELAHave to find something to open it.

DANIEL(Goes to a cupboard and rummages inside.)

Just what we need, a hammer and a chisel.(Comes back to the suitcase and starts to open it carefully withthe tools.)

ANGELAWhy bother? Just crack it open!

(The suitcase stops ringing.)

DANIEL(Laughs.)

Seems like its scared of you.

ANGELAI wonder for how long. Give me the hammer.

(Takes the hammer and bangs the suitcase.)Seems to me...nothings inside this suitcase...but...

(Bangs particularly hard on the suitcase.)



9/16

6

(The suitcase stops ringing but a loud siren is suddenly heardfrom above Frightened, ANGELA covers her ears with her hands.DANIEL stands motionless. The siren stops.)

DANIEL

What was that?

ANGELADont know... Im even afraid to think what it could be.

DANIEL(Sarcastically.)

I thought you cant think, but it turns out youre just afraid to.

ANGELAYes, and I wont hide it. Thinking is both harmful and fearful. In a word,

fearfully harmful. If you dont think about anything, youre responsiblefor nothing. Just go with the flow and everything will be all right.

DANIELWhat flow?

ANGELAThe wish for a better life under any circumstance.

(One of the locks of the suitcase opens with a loud clatter.)

ANGELA (contd)Look! Its opened by itself!

(Grabs the unlocked corner of the suitcase and triesunsuccessfully to lift it.)

Help me!

DANIEL(Helps ANGELA to lift the corner without success.)

Wait...

ANGELA

Do it! One more try and...

DANIELWe need a lever. Just to put inside and...

ANGELANo need.

(Shoves her fingers into the slit and little by little manages to get



10/16

7

her whole hand inside the suitcase.)Too narrow...but...

DANIELWell? Whats there? Touch anything?

ANGELANot yet.

DANIELMust be a phone inside... Just have to touch it.

ANGELAI dont have to do anything for anybody. If I want to find a phone in thissuitcase, Ill do it, if not, Ill just get up and walk away.

DANIELGo right ahead. Walk. I didnt invite you here.

ANGELADont talk to me like this or...

DANIELOr what?

ANGELAOr youll regret it.

DANIELWont you regret it?

ANGELANo, I wont. I never regret anything. Whatever happens, I dont regret itbecause I know it could be much worse than what had alreadyhappened...

(Suddenly starts to scream.)A-a-a-ah!

DANIELWhats the matter?

ANGELAThe suitcase! Its crushing my hand!

DANIEL



11/16

8

Pull your hand out!

ANGELACant you see thats what Im trying to do? It just wont let go!

DANIELAngie, relax! Calm down.(Tries to lift the corner higher.)

ANGELA(Says to the suitcase.)

Let go! It hurts!(Manages to pull out her hand.)

DANIELHave you had something to drink today?

ANGELAWhat? Of course, I have! Water, tea, coffee...and cognac too.

DANIELThats it. You had a few drinks and now the suitcase pinches you...

ANGELABut it really did! And crushed... Oh! It really hurts.

(Rubs her sore hand.)

DANIEL(Ironically.)

If you insist it did, maybe you shouldve asked it more politely to stop?Perhaps you shouldve said, Oh please, Mr. suitcase, dont do that,please let me go, and Ill do anything you ask!

(The suitcase opens wide with a loud bang.)

DANIEL (contd)(Looks inside.)

Look! Theres really a phone! Really an old-style one...

ANGELATo hell with all this crap!

(Kicks the suitcase.)

(The phone starts to ring again.)



12/16


13/16

10

DANIELWhat are you doing? Hit your own head, not mine!

(A voice booms from some loudspeaker above.)

VOICETo switch on the loudspeaker any head is fine.

DANIEL(Lifts up his head to the VOICE.)

Why the loudspeaker?

VOICEFor making a free choice.

ANGELA, DANIEL

(Together.)What free choice?

VOICEThe most important in your life.

ANGELA(Lifts up her head to the VOICE.)

Who are you?

DANIEL

Why are you interfering with private life? Well complain!

VOICEAbout what? About a self-speaking hundred-year-old wirelesstelephone?

ANGELAWe can complain about a biting suitcase.

VOICEThen youll both be staying very soon in a place where everything is

free.

DANIELWhat do you want from us?

VOICEOne of you must take the spot vacated by your grandfathers death.



14/16

11

DANIELWhat spot?

VOICEStooge...eh...custodian of the Conglomerate of Global Irresponsibility.

DANIELWhat if we dont agree?

VOICEYou have such right.



15/16

12

ANGELAWait! What does a custodian have to do?

VOICELive.

ANGELAJust live? Here?

VOICEYes.

ANGELAFor free?

VOICE

Yes.

ANGELAI agree.

DANIELWhy? Its my apartment! Its me who has the right to be the custodian!I also want to live for free.

VOICEThe situation is ambiguous... You must wait for the final decision.

ANGELAFor how long?

DANIELWhen will the final decision be made?

VOICEIn approximately 31 million 800 thousand seconds.

ANGELA

Oh, just seconds? Then we can sit here for a while and wait.

VOICEPlease wait. You have the right. So, the preliminary decision is made.All clear.



16/16

13

(The lights dim slowly. DANIEL and ANGELA first look stupefied ateach other, then walk around like robots, sit down, and staythere motionless. Two distinct voices are heard from theloudspeaker.)

FIRST VOICEWhat are they doing?

SECOND VOICEWaiting.

FIRST VOICEFor what?

SECOND VOICEFor a carefree life.

FIRST VOICESo that they wont have to do anything?

SECOND VOICEThey dont want to do anything.

FIRST VOICEIts boring.

SECOND VOICE

Its irresponsible. But, their choice to be stooges.

(The lights dim completely, the sound of a door slowly grindsclose.)

End


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The Mysterious Suitcase