Friday, October 13, 1995 The Magazine of the University of Waterloo Engineering Society Volume 6 I~sue 2 . ;: , .... -' . ~ .

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The "OJ Withdrawal" Issue t , ~ 1 !' ~ T ~ • ~ "..,,, .' , • ",,4 T' _

146 Days Left ... OK, Now What? Dandy Man EDiC

EimPlY don't have time to graduate. I have enough on my plate right

ow that the thought of graduating is just more than I need. Don't get me wrong, I'm looking forward to getting my Iron Ring and my degree, but the set of thoughts and standard things that most fourth year students do when graduation is around the comer isn't looking so appealing. I don't want to look for a job right now. I can't deny that having a job after graduation would be peachy-keen, but I feel that there's something missing, something that T have yet to do before I step into the world of careers and mortgages. I can't afford to scurry around like I was still going through regular co-op place­ments, preparing cover-letters, making minute adjustments to my resume and getting depressed because there just aren't enough decent jobs out there. I've been through enough co-op rounds to have my fill of the entire process. I'm due for a little time for myself. The last thing I need is to have co-op taking up a load of my time to almost constitute another course-load. The fact that I may soon have to suc­cumb to the process annoys me. I don't want to subscribe to the notion that we must fmd a job, start a family, own a house and plan for our retirements as soon as we get our degrees.

I was in POETS the other day relaxing with a game of darts with my room-mate, Mario. We were both alternately trans­fixed either by our game or by the movie playing on the POETS TV, but we also couldn't help but to over-hear a conversa­tion among a group of what appeared to be second year students. They were all happily telling each other their stories aoout their work terms, full of optimism, pride, and plans for taking future work terms off to travel.

Mario then turned to me and said, "Y cah, just like we were all going to take

our last work term off to go travel." I nodded in agreement as I took my last

shot and said, "Just when did we get so cynical?"

"Oh, about 3A I would say" was Mario's response.

I can bet that most of the university stu­dents, especially co-op students, had planned to do some traveling before graduation or thought that it would be nice to take off a term and travel. Unfor­tunately, the majority of us haven't car­ried out that dream due to economics or to the competitive nature of the co-op sys­tem. A few have managed to travel, either as part of an exd'lange program or have actually managed take a work-term off. I for one am a part of the majority that had the travel bug but for some rea­son or another r allowed the travel bug to die. For a while there, it was looking as if I was joining the masses who are deter­mined to get on with their careers. As of now I'm going to make a conscious effort not to look for a job. At least not yet. Am I worried about getting a job? Yes, but I'm confident that I will eventually find one, and it will be on my own terms as to how I go aoout the actual search. What am I hoping to do in the meantime? What brought about this renewed attitude? Actually a few friends rekindled or revived that old travel bug and the adventw'Ous and care-free attitude that comes with not having any prior commit­ments.

I spent a good part of last Thanksgiving Saturday evening with some friends that I've known since before high school. That evening was special because it was the first time that I was able to get togeth­er with a friend from high school who had been in a serious accident that hap­pened just over a year and a half ago. The last time I saw her, she was lying in a hospital bed, unconscious and had just come out of an induced coma. The details of the accident and the fact that she is now making a good recovery are unimportant but what is important here is that her entire attitude and outlook on

life now is noticeably changed (for the better of course). We've all heard that people who overcome life-threatening diseases or illnesses often don't just return back to their desks and daily routines. Most want to savour their lives as they realize what little of life they actually have experienced, or that there is more to life than the pursuit of money or material wealth. Although I haven't experienced the same kind of life-altering incident she has, I can hope to share in her outlook, vigour and attitude. A good friend of mine is taking a trip soon after she finish­es her studies to trek across the countries along the South Pacific Rim What is out­standing about this is that she is virtually going it alone and that her adventure­some spirit and attitude has spurred alive the dormant travel bug that was within me. She has inspired me to do the same. If anyone can do it I know that she can, therefore so can I. Although the outback in the down-under and the land of the kiwis ranks up there for places to go, Europe beckons and (if all goes well) I will heed her call. So sometime after I get that little piece of parciunent saying that I've endured four-plus years of engineer­ing here at Waterloo and well after I've received my Iron Ring, I'll be making my way across the Atlantic to experience more of life and to, in a cliched sort of way, 'find myself.

I know that this is ever so cliche (again), but the phrase, carpe diem (seize the day), is rather appropriate. Living every day like it was your last seems lil,<e a good philosophy, for the next little while at least. I can't possibly do everything I want to do in life but I'm going to tty to do the more important things while I'm still able to.

Wht; should we live with such hum; and UXlSte of life? We are determined to be staroed before we are hungry. Men say that a stitch irl time ${:Ire; nine, and SO they take a thousand stitches today to Stl'U'! nine tomorrow.

-Henry David Thoreau.

To the person who destroyed the IW distribution box in the CPH foyer:

TIlANKYOU: TIlANKYOU:

TIlANKYOU:

TIlANKYOU:

TIlANKYOU:

TIlANKYOU: The Editor

For being so selfish in fulfilling your wanton desires for destruction of property. For destroying a central distribution box for the Iron Warrior that students (not just engineers) used and enjoyed. For illustrating that oafs like you could affect others without any thought to your actions. (Did you think you could sit on it?!?? Or were you just a passing idiot, mad at the world and everything in it, thinking(?) that the destruction of an inanimate object would solve all your worldly dilemmas?) For not even having the common courtesy or manners to pick up after yourself, leaving the broken remnants of the box and the newspapers strewn all over the area. For not having the common courtesy or manners in leaving a note explaining that it was an accident or that it was a brief but unintentional fit of rage directed at this poor INANIMATE object. Maybe such an explanation would be understood and forgiven. Maybe, ..... ,.but it's too late now. For pissing me off on Thanksgiving Weekend(which was an otherwise very enjoyable weekend).

Letter to the Editor

DearIW,

Under the Impression

Upon reading the artide submitted by Kirsten Leroij in the last IW, I feel that I have to respond to some of the accusations. For those who didn1 read the article, she dis­cussed that as a leader during Frosh Week, she fe~ continually pressured to consume alcohol and that she specifically blamed the Engineering Society for this.

While it may be true that she fe~ pressure to drink from other leaders and frosh, I believe it is a mistake to blame the Engineering Society for the actions of some of its mem­bers. The Engineering Society had a hand in organizing Frosh Week, however it is absurd to have it police the drinking habits of the frosh week participants. Furthermore, it cannot be denied that the ultimate decision to drink always rests with the drinker. Essentially, I believe that it is unfair to use EngSoc as a scapegoat for bad experiences with alcohol.

I too was a frosh leader and I also drank occasionally during Frosh Week. I however never fe~ pressure from anyone to drink, and I hope that if I did I would have the moral fortitude to stop drinking when I fe~ that I have had enough. One cannot blame someone else for one's own drinking habits, and doing so is cop-out since the responsibility to drink is one's own.

I really don't want to get into the details of the Frosh Week parties, however, I was at those events. It seemed to me that those who were drinking were doing so of their own volition and I noticed several people who had chosen not to drink. In fact, all frosh leaders were specifically told not to promote drinking to the frosh, and I did not see any hidden agenda to the contrary.

Additionally, every colour group had some leaders who wore armbands which guaranteed them to be sober during that event This was seen by the frash as a good thing, since they S(J)N some people in a position of authority who were able to enjoy themselves without alcohol.

It is possible that some Engineering students like to force other people to drink. It is perhaps a better idea to talk to those people instead of characterizing EngSoc as an alcohol-promoting society. It should be recognized that for every person who enjoys having other people drink with them, perhaps to fulfill a psyd1ological need to drink, there are countless others who look at drinking as a freedom of choice. To these people it is more important that others be at the event, having fun. These are the EngSoc members who look at the person who is participa1ing instead of looking at the drink that mayor may not be in hand.

Agustin Lebron 2A Camp (XORcists)

Editor-In-Chief Andrew "Boysenberry" Chan

Assistant Editor Kati "Guava" Princz

layout Editor Doron "Mango" Melnick

Advertising Editor Natalie "Banana" Zgola

Photo Editor Vanessa "Peach" Choy

Layout Staff David "Blueberry" Chang

staff WrIters Mario "Plantene" Bellabarba

Rod "Blackberry" Cave Colin "Apple" Young

Ian "Breadfruit" McCluskey Gary "Plum" Cheng Tim "Apricot" Bums

Mike "Coconut" Zuliani

C·o·n·t·e·n·t·s New Bike Center

Do your own repairs SAE Report Revvin ' it up

4 5

Environment Issues Green Directorship speaks out

Maclean's and UW Some thoughts on the Rankings

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Arts Page 'Toons and Midterms

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Food Section How to buy a cookbook

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Juicing the Apocalypse Not guilty of cynicism?

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Spy Vs. Spy All the lurid details

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Bizarre Charity Event The event, not the charity ...

EngSoc Spews Be News Hunka Chunks

73 14

New Bicycle Center

Mike Zulianl 4A Systems (Sydestic)

Wednesday, October 18 marks the Grand Opening of the UW Bicycle Centre locat­ed in the Student Life Centre (SLC). The

Bike ID and the Bike Info Forum will run all day and the bike auction will start at 6 PM. Drop by the Bicy­cle Centre and see what we have to offer.

Hey! Where is the Bike Centre anyway? The Bicycle Centre is located in the basement of the

Student Life Centre just past the OBC branch and Dr. Disc. From outdoors, just look for the door on the north-west comer of the SiC. It's right next to the SiC's loading docks. Look for the red Air Serve box mounted on the wall ..

Grand Opening Events Wednesday, October 18

Free Bike ID The Bike Centre staff will engrave your drivers

license number on your bicycle for free. When your stolen bicycle is recovered, it can be returned to you instead of being sold at a bike auction. Bring your bike and your drivers license (if you don't have a license, we'll figure something out) to the Bicycle Centre any­time between 10 AM and 5 PM.

Bike Auction Bicycles that have been recovered but unclaimed will

be auctioned off to the highest bidder. All proceeds go towards the Bicycle Centre.

Feel free to browse the bikes for auction from 10 AM to 6 PM in the SiC.

The auction will start at 6 PM in the SLC atrium.

Bicycling Information Forum Everything you wanted to know about cycling, but

were afraid to ask Booths will be set-up and staffed by local cycling gurus. See what local shops have to offer and watch their demonstxations. Fmd out about local bicycling clubs. Meet local law enforcement officials and find out what you should know before it's too late.

............ In the SLC atrium from 10 AM to 6 PM.

~ Opening Ceremony Ribbon cutting and welcome to the UW Bicycle Cen­

tre - at the Bicycle Centre at 1 PM.

Bicycle Centre Services The Bicycle Centre offers various services to help you keep your bicycle in good condition.

Air You no longer have to trek long distances to fmd air.

The red Air Serve air compressor conveniently located on campus, just outside the Bike Centre. Available 24 hours a day, on the north side of the Student Life Cen­tre, between the loading dock and Ring Road. For only a quarter (25\t) you can keep your bicycle tires at their correct pressure (proceeds go towards the Bike Centre).

Do-it-Yourself Repair The Bike Centre's Do-It-yourself Repair Service will

be available starting October 19. Any members of the UW community (Students, Faculty and Staff) can bring their bicycles to the Bike Centre to perform most types of bicycle repair. Come down to change a tire, adjust your derailleurs or overhaul your bottom bracket. (If

you don't understand a word, don't worry, there will be courses offered, repair manuals available and staff ready to lend a hand). The Bicycle Centre is equipped with a full range of repair tools to fix any part of your bicycle. There is a bicycle workstand to hold your bicy­cle, a wheel truing stand to make your wheels round again and all sorts of wrenches to keep your nuts and bolts screwed on tight

Do-It-Yourself Repair Hours of Operation (Starting October 19)

Tuesdays - Noon to 3 PM Thursdays - 4 PM to 7 PM Sundays - Noon to 3 PM

Repair Education Workshops and courses will be offered throughout

the term that will help you maintain your bicycle in tip­top sha pe. Stay tuned for more infonnation.

Cycling Information For more information, check-out our bulletin boards

inside the Bike Centre and in the SLC between the Bomber and Scoops, or visit our WWW site at

http://sail.uwaterloo.ca/ -mjzulian/bike Email can be sent to the Bike Centre c/o:

mjzulian@zeus.uwaterloo.ta, ..

David Chang 1A Chem IW Staff

y y

SPy vs. Spy, the theme of this term's scunt, truly tested our skills, stamina, and ingenuity as Engineers. The grueling twenty-four hour

event started off with a mission briefing by the scunt gods and an appearance by The Tool. Spyorganiza­tions gathered together, showing to the scunt gods who the spies truly were. With the murdering of the black spy and a quick dip in the fountain, events started way with a truly unique banana race.

Rampaging through campus, careful not to disturb those studying of course, a relay race streamed through campus. Stations were held all across campus with obstacles for the spies to conquer. Winners of the race proved themselves worthy of seeing the immaculate list first.

As tearns were sent off with their missions on hand,

The scores were close, but after squaring the logarithms of the sine of

the scores, the result was at hand.

scunt gods prepared to test these spies once again with challenging events. These events were held all throughout the twenty-four hour stretch, consisting of anything from snowman building in September (the Artsies were in awe) to H2O absorption.

As the hours passed, tearns prepared to greet the scunt gods with food and drinks that could only be found in heaven. Headquarters, closely guarded by each team, was the destination of the scunt gods' visits.

This marked the final stages of the spy game. With only a few events left in the scunt, this was the time to test the endurance of the spies. Hard as it was, spies were able to show up to the events. This pleased the gods.

The final item in the scunt was of course the items. With lists of many things I thought impossible to obtain, teams were still able to complete many of the lists. All sorts of items were brought in. After final scores were tallied, the gods came together to tally the scores for the entire scunt. The scores were close, but after squaring the logarithms of the sine of the scores, the result was at hand.

The morning ended with the scunt gods passing on the trophy to the winners. Debriefing occurred at 13:00 on the Saturday. The winner? c.I.A., with Spectre closely behind. All the other tearns also did extremely well. Special mention goes to a team made up of four members, from ENG scx::: A. They know who they are (OASys). They and all the other organizations truly established the spirit of the event.

As a sidekick to these almighty gods, I believe they put all their effort into making what I truly call a SCUNT. My thirty-one hour journey was minuscule compared to the three months of preparation the scunt gods put in. They truly are gods... Thank you ELE­COM '97.

For the complete lowdown on the,Havenger Scunt, complete with revealing photographs of people in

contpromisingpo~plt~ni!~:r.<tge 12.

On the Road With Formula SAE Stephan (Schwag) Schwelghofer 4A MECH BULLS

Tie Formula SAE is an international engineer­ing competition in which engineering students

. from competing schools design, build, test, and drive a race car. The car is slightly smaller then a Fonnula 4 car, like a miniature Indy. As m uch as 85 to 90 schools from the US, Mexico, Puerto Rico, and Canada compete in a grueling three day compe­tition in May. The car is tes ted in several dynamic events such as acceleration and au tocross, as well as static events such as a design analysis and marketing p resenta tions. In t he p as t, Waterloo has done extremely well, corning in as the top Canadian entry consistently since i ts firs t attempt in 1987 with a highest placement of fourth overall.

The 1995 car has a top speed of about 85 mph with the 4 cylinder turbocharged and fuel injected 600cc Honda motorcycle engine generating between 85-90 horsepower. This year's team is building a new car for the 1996 competition, and for the first time we will be using an electronic data acquisition system and exten­sive flow benching to monitor the car while testing to aid us in evaluating and increasing its perfonnance.

The 1996 car will be completely redesigned - it will have a new chassis, a redesigned air intake and exhaust, a modified engine, and a new suspension system to list just a few. One of the goals for the 1996 car is to increase the output of the engine to about 95 to 100 horse w~e reducing the 535lb wet weight by at least 30 lbs. We are

hoping to put Waterloo back into the top yen overall

rankings at the 1996 competition; it's an ambitious pro­ject, bu t so far we seem to be on track.

This is also the first year in which this program is being approached with a professionaL business-like atti­tude. We are creating a large oomputerized database of sponsors and suppliers to aid in th orga.ni.zation of the team and are also mounting a veI)' aggressiv market­ing campaign. We are anticipating direct exposure of

We are anticipating direct exposure of the car and the University of

Waterloo to over half a million people this year through trade shows,

community events such as parades (you may have seen us in the

Oktoberfest Parade a while back), and media exposure.

the car and the University of Waterloo to over half a mil­lion people this year through trade shows, community events such as parades (you may have seen us in the Oktoberfest Parade a while back), and media exposure. This is all part of the new business attitude with which we are approaching this program: we intend to prove to both our sponsors and the University that we are a very worthwhile investment of their time and money.

Our budget is rather large and we depend heavily on oorporate sponsors for most of our funds. The Engi­neering Department provides u w ith som e seed mon y to get started, but the rest m u s t be raised through corporate sponsors and other organizations, such as WEEF, which, incidentally, has consistently been a trong supporter of this program.

TI1€ project involves mostly fourth year Mechanical Engineering students, although there are number of y Ullger stud nts helping out with nstruction and testing. me of the projects that OlInger students can get involved witll include fixing up the dyno for engine testing, building new A-anns for the 1995 car and fix ing up the '95 car so that we can use it to test the data acqui­sition syst m we have. Other tasks include aiding in rebuilding the engine, construction of jigs for the frame, aiding in publi relations, etc. There is a lot to do in a veI)' short period of time, and if you have an interest in joining the Fonnula SAE project, it is a good idea to get started early: you will get veI)' good exposure to the program and learn a lot that will aid you in constructing your own car when you reach fourth year. For those interested in the FSAE program, there will be a general meeting next week sometime. 01eck the electronic cal­endar on WA TSTAR for the date and place or feel free to stop the FSAE office, room # 1207 in Engineering 3, or contact myself at sjschwei@mechanical.

We hope to see a lot of new students at the meeting. In the mean time, we'll be building the winning car for the 1996 competition. We'll keep you posted!

. .. dlret:;;~ ~11arge. ' of a spec"~l event or jllst 10tH' t t o order SOllie El1 ine 'ring . sltirts, call us for a

price quote.

,Ask for sanlpie sign~outs

Call ext 3914 or entail u~vshop@bgl.uwaterloo.ca

UW SHOP South Campus Hall ..

Romans. the Environment, and You Malcolm Hili AICoH20LlCs Recycling Co-ordinator

H ow much is enough? What am I talking about? I'm referring to the oLd catch phrase, "Think globally, act locally". How much

Local action is enough? Many environmentalists in the field are greatly overworked, putting in 12 hour days at work, then volunteering for a myriad of environmental organizations and groups on their own time. In speaking with one such busy environ­mentalist who regularly has 16 hour days, he told me, "There is just so much that needs to be done, I can't help myself." This type of altruistic attitude is bordering on the insane and can perhaps be consid­ered 'more than enough'. However, a student who is too lazy to go to the front of the class to put their pop can in the recycling bin can easily be classified as someone who is in the 'not enough' category. Various other categories come to mind for this type of person but for the sake of brevity, I will omit them here. The point here is that you must find a happy medium approach to environmental issues where you are aware and accountable for all the actions in your life. Maybe the aforementioned environmen­talist could easily handle his work load without burning out. If so, that may be his personal happy medium. The choices we make to help the environ­ment are up to the individual and everyone has per­sonallimitations that may be due to a busy schedule or budget limitations. Lack of awareness and apa-

thy are no longer acceptable or viable alternatives in your society. We need action.

lliestyle is very important in the decisions we make to help the environment. Recently, some friends of mine spent an academic term in Rome and were initial­ly struck by the total absence of any local recycling pro­gram in any of the ne ighbourhoods. They were appalled and believed Rome to be a very backward city with no concern for the environment After spending some time in the city and becoming more familiar with the lifestyles and customs of the locals, their opinions

If you are aware of the bigger picture (the origin of electriCity, the

destination of water down the drain, etc.), then hopefully the choices you

make on a dally basis will be a reflection of this knowledge.

began to change. In the performance of daily actions, the Romans were observed to produce much less trash than North Americans. They also seemed to consume much less water and electricity. Every household has their favorite grocery bag that they use to transport gr0-

ceries from the store, saving dozens of plastic dispos­able grocery bags per week. Glass jars are often kept and reused. Stores do not provide nearly the same

amount of excess packaging as the ones in North Amer­ica. This is partly due to the fact that much of the food is bought in bulk (beans, flour, etc.) or at specialty stores, like bakeries where the fresh bread does not require large amounts of packaging. Ultimately, Romans pro­duce less waste because they know how to live togeth­er. They have been doing it for years (and years and years ... ). They discovered a long time ago that grubage is very expensive, and that it is not practical in a situa­tion with so many people living in such close proximity to produce excess waste. There just isn't the space. So essentially, every Roman citizen is "thinking globally and acting locally" simply by adopting a certain lifestyle. Certainly more can be done, such as setting up a recycling program, but the basis, the mentality, has already been established.

How much is enough? The answer rests with you; it is in your own conscience. If you are aware of the big­ger picture (the origin of electricity, the des~tion of water down the drain, etc.), then hopefully the choices you make on a daily basis will be a reflection of this knowledge.

Last week I mentioned a coffee house on environ­mental concerns in my article. One is planned for Mon­day, October 16, 8:00 - 9:00 PM at 58 Regina Street North. We will be discussing work related experiences in the environmental field, recycling issues at Waterloo and other environmental issues. All are welcome. Please contact Malcolm at 886-8747 for further details, or e-mail me at mthill@c.hernical.

Distinguished Teacher Awards

To nominate your outstanding professor, demonstrator, or teaching assistant for the Distinguished Teacher

Award, contact TRACE, MC 4055, Ext. 3132.

lO¢ RE UME COPIES

SUBMIT DAMMIT!

ARTICLES, LETTERS, PHOTOGRAPHS, GRAPHICS, REVIEWS, RECIPES, STORIES, POEMS, ESSAYS AND ANYTHING ELSE

Please submit both printout and soft copy if possible - save or export file in RTF format

(.rtf extension) TO STUDENTS WITH A CURRENT STUDENT CARD

TO CHOOSE FROM Monday - Friday 8:00 am - 8:00 pm

SATURDAYS lO:OOam - 5:00pm STUDENT LIFE CENTRE, LOWER LEVEL , .

NEXT ISSUE DEADLINE: FRI. OCT. 27

DROP IT OFF AT: - The Iron Warrior Mailbox

in the Orifice - The Iron Warrior Office

- iwarrior@wedge.watstar.uwaterloo.ca

Fall 1995

Awards

SANDFORD FLEMING FOUNDATlON

Work Term Reports Teaching Assistantship Excellence Awards Engineering Debates Technical Speaker Competition Karen Mark Scholarship

CPH 4306 (519) 888-4008

Financial Assistance Travel Grants Emergency Loans

Presentations & Bridging the Gap Sponsorships Ontario Engineering Competition

Anyone wishing to learn more about the Foundation may contact the Waterloo Camus Office at x4008 or

in CPH 4306 or email: sft@dean.watstar.

Funding for this award comes from engineering student contributions and depends on them for continuation.

An organization devoted to the advancement of engineering education.

Waterloo #1 - But At What? Some Thoughts About Th M e ,

Rod Cave 4A Electrical

E's that time of year again. The cold rains return, the crisp air of autunm fills our nostrils and as the

vered leaves fall to Earth we read the Maclean's Annual University Ranking in the shadow of the ivory tower.

In recent years Waterloo has ranked exceptionally well among Canadian w1iversities. Categories pertain­ing to its recognition in the commW1ity of business, the size of its classes and its library holdings etc. have all empirically shown that Waterloo is very good at some­thing. But good at what? Preparing worker units to join the labour pool in discrete packets of forty odd students who mayor may not have spent time with said library holdings? Does it really mean anything beyond good publicity for future grads, and is there any significance to the darkly held secret of Waterloo's worse than mediocre ranking in the very first survey?

These are indeed a lot of questions and ones to which it is perhaps better the answers were not known. (cue Gothic organ music pregnant with suspense and impending horror)

Interestingly enough, the first Maclean's ranking and the one that was the subject of so much controversy was taken from a singularly unorthodox perspective; that of the student. While at the time it may not have seemed so rash, when one looks at the resulting conclusions it is hard to be sympathetic with these students and their perspectives. Waterloo 22nd? Right after York? Out of some 46 or 47 odd universities?

Quality of life was considered important, and ',·Whether.or. not. saia stuaents'liad adequate housing; ......... ' ..... " .. " .... - ................ .

professor-student interaction or just a good time fac­tored heavily into the equation. This was before statisti­cal methodology and quantitative science dismissed our reservations and assured us wholeheartedly of what must have really been the truth after alL Water­loo's the best. Says who? Says the reputationalsurvey, that's who.

Quite obviously just going around and asking a bunch of students how much they like school and what they think they're g tting out of their education is not

The matter does remain as to how to balance the interest of the students

with those of the ... end user. Countries are not run, industries not built, nor communities nurtured on

shorterm product cycles.

really a rigourous methodology. What is far more important, and certainly subject to more stringent analysis is sending out surveys. Surveys that are com­pleted by CEOs, deans of other lUl.iversities, high school guidance counselors, 1V anchorpeople etc. Important people. They assess how much they like their employ­ees! colleagues and what they think they're getting out of their workforce and if s all tabulated quite nicely to provide an irrefutable conclusion:

Waterloo delivers good product. People that need people to work for them like Water­

. 100 .. .. ~~~e: with· q.ria;rterly returns upPennost in their

minds are never happier w)len they know they can sign up a few more systems grads a know, I've had my eye on one myself).

Bill Gates loves Waterloo grads. Ready to work right out of the box. Coop prepares you with marketable skills, the edge in technology and a four month time frame suited to high tech development cycles. Water­loo grads are hard working, career conscious, and used to being intensely focussed on their immediate objec­tives until it's time to mow onto th(;' next sixt('('l1 weekc; of hell.

Th .se tlr' ·mpioy 't ~ who will I\(.'I P yOll m.lkl' " h althy profit starting t d"y. TIl{ Y .1Tl' young, titill im: ginativc and (.'an be miLkL>d for <llllhl'ir idt\lS lx>(Olt'

you trad up on th next g >ncr.ltion. Technology changes SO qui kly - who has lime to rt'lrain?

It's all a bit cxccssiv '. Th) maller docs remain as to how to baI.mce the interest of the stlldcnLo; with th()~i(.' of the ... end user. ountries arc not run, indul>triL~ not built, nor communities nurtured 01\ short nn product cycles. What makes a good empl y does n t n sarily make a good person. In hoosing to come to Waterloo most people do realiz that they are ~ ing on a marketable skill set somewhat to the d trirnent of a holistic education, but do we want our educati n stream lined more and more to meet the interests of a group of people who don't have our long term security at heart?

Then again, maybe these two interests aren't exclu­sive. Maybe Waterloo can still score top marks in the reputational survey while offering room for personal development.

Maybe not.

•

•

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"Mike" by Ian McCluskey

s E c T I o N

How to Buy a Cookbook Colin Young 4N Mechanical

SO now that you've tried the Iron Warrior recipes, and you have broken free of the Kraft Dinner myth perpetuated by the popular

media, you are ready to strike out on your own and buy your very own cookbook (as opposed to stealing them from

r ...... ~_

mom or dad). I

The problem is, "...*""+II.pd"'~r;JiIi"'~ bookstore you go into either has three books, one of which is Bachelor's Guide to ... " or some other such book insulting yo newly acquired skill, or has three full shelves filled top to bot­tom with "Macrobiotic Feminist Vegetarianism" and other thing you never even dreamed existed. What is a poor student to do? Chances are, you have a limited budget, and want the best book for the least money. That's where this handy guide to buying a cookbook comes in.

The first thing to do is classify yourself. Biologists do this to animals, so why not do it to yourself? Are you a carnivore, vegetarian or omnivore? Unless you are Scottish, there is a very slim chance you are a carnivore (for all you Scots there's about a 13% chance) and you do in fact eat some vegetables (even if it is accidental). Most of us fit into the omnivore category, with a few people completely vegetarian (but more than carni­vores). There are different degrees of omnivoriousness (yes, I just made up that word) so you will be best to decide if you tend to the carnivore or vegetarian side. Just to clear things up, fish are animals, so if you eat dead fish flesh, you are not a vegetarian.

Once you have decided which category you fall into, you have narrowed your choices - maybe. Any­body who never eats vegetables and is still reading this, may as well give up now since you probably pre­fer to catch you own dinner and consume it before it gets cold. For the rest, I'll start with some general com­ments first

The general trend in cookbooks over the past few years has been to '1ight" this and "low fat" that, lead­ing to all kinds of recipes that have all the good bits removed, yielding pretty bland meals. This is not always the case, however, and there are some very good books that list both the "modernized" and origi­nal recipes, allowing you to choose. Your best bet is to flip through the book and look at th~pes before buying, and decide if it appears the author knew what

he or she was doing. The other general comment that can be made is if

the store does not carry any books from Chronicle or Ten Speed Press, leave immediately. Both of these publishers consistently produce top quality books with incredible artwork and layout, and are written by professionals who love both cooking and sharing their enthusiasm for food with the reader. This is not to say that other publishers do not produce good books; they are just not as consistent as these two.

Vegetarians have it easiest when it comes to select­ing books since there is a limited selection, so there are fewer to decide between. This also means it will be necessary to find a bookstore with a good selection. In Waterloo, I would suggest Words Worth Books, who have a large selection of cookbooks, including vegetar­ian. One caution, how)ver. Some authors have been known to slip tuna into their books and, if you do not eat dairy products, you will want to carefully look through the book before buying.

For the rest of us, even if we are vegetarian most of the time, we have a bit more freedom in selecting a book, which also means a few more decisions. One method I have found that works for me is choosing a style or region and exploring the different cookbooks available. If you are not sure of the regional cooking you like, try to find a book that has a variety of region­al dishes. One of my favourites is "Sundays at the Moosewood," which is actually a mostly vegetarian

book (a little bit of tuna slipped in) that contains recipes from Africa, Provence, England (believe it or not) Scandi­navia, Eastern Europe, and several other areas.

·~.I James Barber also has several inexpensive paperback books (''The Urban Peasant") that are

very good. Another option is exploring the regional cooking that you have particularly enjoyed at a restau­rant Once you are a master of one region (or are sick of eating pasta for every meal), you may want to move on to a different region. You may either choose at this point to go for a radical change, or pick a neighbour­ing cuisine. For example, if you have been experiment­ing with Italian cooking, you may now wish to try Japanese (radical) or Provencal or Greek (related). Provencal and Greek would then lead to Spanish and Turkish or Middle Eastern, respectively. Do not hesi­tate to experiment with vegetarian cooking. Your gr0-

cery bills will drop, and there are numerous 10ng­term, demonstrated, health benefits to diets low in meat content Besides, some of the best cookbooks out

now are vegetarian in nature. Once you have started to experiment witll cooking,

you will soon develop the skill to sort out the good books from the duds.

To get you started, here are a few of my favourites. ''The Vegetarian Table" from Chronicle Books. There are two books in tltis series so far: Italian and

Mexican. The series does not simply convert meat recipes to vegetarian recipes, but explores the vast array of vegetarian dishes that these cultures offer. You may be surprised to discover that many cultures outside (North) American culture do not view meat as

the focus of the meal. "A Country Gar­

en" series from (I Collins-Harp-

his series choose ingredient as the s of each book,

nd builds recipes round that ingredi­

To my knowledge the series has high­

lighted potatoes, tomatoes, lemons, bernes, apples and an entire book on greens Uettuce).

"The Village Baker" by Joe Ortiz If you really want to learn the how and why of the

bread making process, there are two ways to do it YOll an trav 'I the world, training wilh b"k~'r:-; in numcmus cowllriCS rcnownc I for their bnads, or yO\I

can read this book TIll? first half of this h<x)k L., dt'vot­ed to the theory ofbrcad lnaking, while the 1.18t Chelp­tcr Lc; devoted to pro~ . ' ion.'"I1 f'l'Cipcs thnt read along the lines of "]00 pound of flour ... " In hetw 'n a ' many delicious recipes suitabl for the home baker. Jf you tlUnk bread making is a difficult skill to Imm. and have always believed it was too difficult, this is th ) book to dispel those myths.

If you are just beginning, and arc unsure of your kitchen skills, many exccllent books are available Ulat explain basic kitchen terms and skills, and also contain excellent recipes to practice those skills on. ''TIle Urban Peasant" by James Barber is particularly good for this. Again, look through the book before you buy, and decide if it directed at the right level for you.

As you gain confidence in your skills, you will soon find yourself experimenting, and creating your own unique dishes to treat your friends to.

Just remember, even if you are a little tight for money at the end of the term, your roomate's cat is probably not a good substitute for rabbit in that stew you've always wanted to try.

Juicing the Apocalypse Mario Bellabarba VP Drowlng In His Own Fluids Thank you, have a STRESSED day, and get the hell out of my way/!

O J is free, and I'll bet he's got only one thought going through his mind: "I can't believe my Goddamn luck; thank God we

have a justice system that relies on the emotions of jurors who wouldn't know incontrovertible evidence from a dead body" It seems painfully obvious to me that these jurors were not too bright. After all, one does not end the "Trial of the Century" with less than a day of deliberations. How the hell is ABC supposed to make a TV movie about the long and painful soul searching that the jurors had to do when they were only locked up for about 8 hours, most of which seemed to have been spent deciding on what to order for lunch? On other apoca lyptic fronts:

-A company that makes those cardboard autoshades that you use to cover your windshield when you've parked in the sun has started placing warnings on their product that say, "Do not drive while cardboard cover is in place./I Do you think they were being over cau­tious? The sad truth is that the company had received numerous complaints from motorists who were calling in to say that they couldn't see when they were driving with the product in place. Although companies are not supposed to have to put obvious warnings on products, one manufacturer said that "The idea is to protect against the possibility that some jury, somewhere, might fault you for something that seemed obvious./I Considering recent questionable decisions on the part of jurors, this seems to me like a pretty legitimate concern. However, I also believe anyone who tries to drive with­out taking the autoshade off the windshield seems like a prime candidate for poster child in a birth control cam­paign.

-A recent newspaper headline proclaims "Busy school program gets kids involved in Oktoberfest./I This is all part of KW's attempts to make Oktoberfest a more family oriented celebration. My question is, when are they going to give it up? Oktoberfest is the one time of the year when people can wander around drunk out of their minds, puking all over the place, and everybody yells, '1'hat's the spirit!/I This is not something 1 would want to get my kids involved in (not after the child wel­fare agency started nosing around anyway).

-One of the bridges in St. Jacobs (actually, it's probably the only bridge in ~t. Jacobs) has a sign on it reading: "No Jumping From Bridge" When I looked off the bridge, it seemed pretty clear that there was no more than a few feet of water, clearly not enough to jump in for a swim J can only asswne that the sign is St. Jacob's cash-strapped response to a suicide hot-line, pleading one last time for the jumper to reconsider.

-A couple of examples of Zero Tolerance gone horri­bly astray have recently come up in our public schools. A Toronto elementary school has banned all peanut butter sandwiches and/or any other peanut products from students' lunch bags. The reason for this decision: one of the students at the school has a life-threatening allergy to peanuts, and the school is taking every pre­caution to avoid "accidental ingestion or exposure to a minute smear of peanut butter on a desk or table top." They were even concerned the child might have "an allergic reaction to a peanut-buttery burp in the face," even though ·allergists dismissed this -as -an 1:U'lI""ealistic

risk (of course, they have taken no steps to ban Spam or Jell-O Gel Packs from lunches, a restriction that, from a societal preservation standpoint, would have far more redeeming qualities). This festering and rampant para­noia follows on the heels of a case concerning a teenager who was suspended from a Toronto school for bringing a paring knife onto school grounds. Why did he have a knife? Because the bagel he was going to have at lunch was still frozen when he left for school, and he needed something to slice it with once it thawed. What did school officials say when they heard this? Tough shit; we've got a policy concerning knives, and we're going to stick to it (i.e. we don't feel like evaluating things on a case-by-case basis because, even though it would ensure justice, it would cut into the time I spend hanging around the Teacher's Lounge). Paranoia at its best, folks. Pretty soon, people will have to walk around in full body-armoured environment suits just to avoid the slightest possibility that they might somehow be injured or inflict an injury on someone else.

I have to believe either one of two things; people out there

are really trying to make not­so-subtle pOints, or somebody up there has one demented sense of humour. Personally,

I'm hoping for the latter.

-The Cincinnati Reds won their division without real­izing it until the next day. That's right - baseball, one of the most complicated sports in the world, has now got a tie-breaking system so complex that it wasn't until the baseball statisticians had calculated everything out that they were able to tell the world, three hours after the Reds had finished their division-clinching game, that tl1ey had indeed clinched the title. I'm not sure what has happened to baseball a vowed never to watch a full game again until the Expos have the same record they did when the strike started last year, or the Red Sox make it to the World Series again), but any allusions to Baseball re-entering the hearts of fans everywhere remain premature so long as you need university level training in statistical analysis to enjoy the game. But then, I also refuse to play Mortal Kombat based on my refusal to play any game that requires me to memorize more information than I would for all of my classes combined.

-CFNY has begun advertising on TV, thus equating it to other great stations like CHUM, CHYM and, of course, KOOL-FM. Much as I like CfNY, J was more than a little disappointed to see them hawking their wares on lV like they were offering food dehydrators or Ronco pocket diaper steamers. The ultimate irony is that, as the leading edge "alternative" radio station, they were supposed to at least try and keep the illusion of appealing to angry Gen-Xers who think everything -sucks, and lV's only ·function is to siphon life and IQ

points. -The building that houses Quebec's Director General

of Elections is named the Rene Levesque Building. The • address of the fine payment division of the Ontario Court is p.o. Box 666. I have to believe either one of two things; people out there are really trying to make not-so­subtle points, or somebody up there has one demented sense of humour. Personally, I'm hoping for the latter.

-An ad sponsored by an oil company appeared a few weeks ago stating that, "one litre of gasoline is cheaper than a litre of bottled water." I'm not sure how many people this will sway into changing from Perrier to Pre­mium Grade gasoline, but the ad probably should have said something bout how water is a life giving liquid whereas gasoline is pretty effective at killing living things almost immediately. Of course, this could just be a plot devised by crack-smoking, Italian, liberal, revolu­tionary militant Jewish homosexual lawyers as part of their grand scheme to take over the world.

-The idiot that writes this article doesn't know the dif­ference between Michaelangelo and Da Vinci.

-The V-chip, an item likely to be required in all US manufactured lVs by 1997, is an item designed to block specific shows. The TV stations broadcast a signal along with the program, and parents can determine what level of sex, violence or foul language they want their TV to accept. If the signal exceeds these limits, then the TV won't broadcast the program. Much as I despise the idea of government-imposed morality, I think I could support the idea of a V-chip if they would include a few more parameters to ensure quality. My suggestions: stupidity, cheesiness, references to being trapped on a holodeck, productions from the Saban Entertainment company and, of course, an OJ index.

-There's a new toy for kids, a mini computer, roughly the size of an electronic organizer, that you can use to send messages to other kids who have the same item. I can only imagine the nightmare that this would create for teachers who had to deal with any number of kids who had these things. Then again, I wouldn't be sur­prised if the parent company waited until they sold mil­lions of the things, and then started making radio inter­ference devices and selling them to schools. And any­way, these things take all the fun out of passing notes, the point of which was to disrupt the whole class, not just the sender and the receiver.

Hopefully, midterms are pretty much done by now. I only have one "official" mid-term (ie. none of my other profs call them mid-terms), and I keep telling myself that so long as it hasn't gone by yet, I know I'm staying on top of things. For those of you still trying to figure out an excuse to party other than "midterms are over" or "it's one of those days ending in '1", here are a cou­ple of good ones:

Oct 20 - The world's largest popsicle is assembled: 5750 lbs, 1975.

Oct 22 - The first used car dealership opens, London, 1897.

Oct 23 - The first used car salesman lies to a customer, 1897

Oct 25 - The Twilight Zone premiers, 1959. Oct 30 - World's Ugliest Pick-Up Truck contest,

Chadron, Nebraska. Nov 1 - Playboy begins publication, 1953. Nov 2 - The first radio program airs, 1920

l: . . ..... '". "

More Stickers Pleasel

David Caldarelli 2A Computer (XORcists)

k I was gazing at the new Campus Center (or as some ay, the Student Life Center)

on my shiny new WATcard, I sudden­ly came up with an idea. All of those empty spaces for validation stickers on the backside made me think, "Why don't we get stickers for every term that we are enrolled, including work terms?" I just finished my first work term over the summer, and a couple of situations arose in which it would have been ... convenient...to have a S95 sticker.

ends, Paul had the understandable urge to visit his family that lived over two hours away in the city oLoh, let' say ''London''. One Friday at the bus termi­nal, Paul was unpleasantly surprised. After having successfully paid student fare by simply showing his student card three times previously, he was told that without a 595 sticker he must pay full price. Well, imagine Paul's surprise now that he had to pay almost double! So Paul tried the standard technique of try­ing again at a different ticket window, but to no avail. He happened to meet another student from our class, and the two of them politely argued with the manager, but they were turned down flat and they both paid the extra amount.

The way I see it, we are all FULL time students. We pay our rather large CCKlP fee (yes £rosh, have another look at that fee statement, and no, it's not option­al). We have a commitment to go to work at least five days a week for the duration of the work term, which we must keep in order to graduate. Not to mention the work tern1. report, which must be handed in one week into the

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I live in Burlington, a forty-five minute GO train ride away from down­town Toronto where I worked. After having bought two of the four monthly passes I needed to make the commute, I actually read one of the signs at the sta­tion. It turns out there is actually a stu­dent rate which would have saved me somewhere around $50 per month (I

don't know the exact figure). That day, I went to the customer service office at Union Station, and asked whether I was qualified for the student rate or not:

nextamderrUct~ ~twed~tcly ?================================================-===-~ do not have is a "swruner off' (although

''Well, are you going to school right now?"

''Yes, I'm doing a work term, which is required by my program"

"Well, are you getting paid for it?" "Umm, yes, but..." ''Well, I'm sorry, but you're not really

going to school now, are you." End of conversation. I'm sure that if I

had just shown my card with a S95 stick­er on it, I wouldn't have even had to go through questions, and I would have received the discount rate.

A similar situa tion was related to me by a friend; we'll call him "Paul" G'll pro­tect his true identity). Paul was working near me in downtown Toronto, and he was living at a U of T residence (which now has one extra Waterloo Engineering sticker in it). Every two or three week-

we sure try to make it seem that way). Therefore, we deserve whatever advan­tages come with being a student twelve months a year.

I realize that Students Advising Co­op (or is it Students Against Co-op?) is always asking for ideas, but I figured that it is the Engineering faculty which really gives us the stickers. fed note: Actually its the UW Registrar's Office that does] So I decided to write this article, and see what people think. To summarize, my point is: we should be given a validation stick­er for every CCKlp approved work term. Everyone is welcome to respond (or lend support) to this article. Hey, maybe this will even be mentioned in next issue's "Apocalypse Later"!

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More Fun Than a Barrel of Monkeys (But Don't Feed Them Bananas)

Michou "Cupid" Valentik Elecom99

~e nights (well, that's if you could differenti­

. ate them from the days for some of us) were long and tortuous ... gruelling tests of a

man's/woman's social interaction abilities on mini­mal survival conditions. It was the most spectacular day of teamwork and organization ever assembled in less than thirty seconds (with a touch of chaos thrown in just for good measure).

I

was there ... Geoff was there ... "Nessa was off on some godforsaken wilderness expedition to recover a lousy IC (which was subsequently lost and refound several times ... sorry, guys) and Kyle was serving up more orders than a short-order chef in the Louisiana Sunday heat.

It started off in the high-noon Ontario sun with a national security team procession (reads: OA) escorting a top-secret motorcade through the confines of the E2 courtyard. The occupants of the cars? None other than James Bond (cheap floozy at his side), Inspector Gadget (Penny in tow) and a 240 horsepower, nitrous fuel­injroed,rip-roarin' chainsaw. What happened? Well, if you weren't there, use your imagination ... (hey! Why weren't you there?)

The skinny: -Mike Worry was unleashed in solo action -Mitch ate a dirt-cnCll5ed, flesh-rended banana of hor-

ror

And OA (Elecom '99) was off at an incomprehensi­ble blistering pace.

Here's where things get coruusing ... so we'll skip those details.

It started with a bang and couldn't help but build momentum. Soon, the early OA lead meant nothing as over one hundred sex-starved frosh began to flex some

~ solidarity muscle, carving a swathing path through the organized events. Elecom '99 was overwhelmed. There existed but one solution .. .force the £rash to face the most unconquerable task possible - head-to-head cPll1R$tion. \yi~ QASys .(Systems :~, qffs~ t114;

term). I swear there was only four of them. Hats off to these guys - if there were ten of them, they could have taken over the Russian Space Station, Mir.

Patterns began to emerge. OA was infatuated with stunts. The campus police became infatuated with the Orange Van. The £rosh were an up-and-coming power. Clues were meant to be hidden in toilet-paper rolls. OASys was awesome, in case we forgot to mention it! Mechs had guts.

Events of notable mention: -Full contact ultimate frisbee on the Grad Hill -Saran-wrap of the Science buildings (note the cool

huge yellow hard hat) -One-man OASys wrecking crew at Calvin Ball (he

was a Mack truck with an extra gear) -Dog food in the fishbowl (p.s. we don;t get it) -Cops interrogating innocent Scunters about the loca-

tion of a heretofore unbeknownst Orange Van (they thought we were going to burn down the Grad House?)

-Rocky was reborn -Bullwinkle came along for the ride -Breakfast at Mel's Diner (somehow our team all

ended up there at the same time) -Duck seduced Mike Worry (we have this on good

word from The Wild One - Bill Gray) -The £rash headquarters (hats off guys, I wish I was

eating steak!) -The £rash made it snow, and in the shape of a giant

turtle, no less! -OASys acquired more goodies (acquisition lists)

with less people than anylxxly! -Agustin built all our missing TIL circuits from

scratch ... (Wow! And I'm in Electrical Eng ... time for a career change)

-" and .. .I'll ea tit!"

Thanks to all the wonderful Scunt Gods who put immense time, planning and financial consideration into this magnificent display of strength, machismo, estrogen, and sleep-deprived hallucinogenic won­derkids. Thanks guys for the wonderful time.

Love ya, ELECOM '99 Now we re off to eat and sleep for the first time in too

long to remember. See ya, MOM. P.S. They'll never take the Orange Van alive!

Where Were YOU When _ I Was Eating Fish?

Michou (Cupid) Valentik Elecom '99

Geoff was there, Nessa was there, Elvis was there, Scully and Mulder w ere there, were you? On Wednesday, October 4th, over 50 brave and gener­ous members of the engineering society converged on the spawning

metropolis if the Joey's Only Patio. Was there a nuclear holocaust b rewin& or merely the spawning of a new link in mankind's evolution? neither, over 100 lbs of the finest fish and chips this side of New England were consumed at alarming rates and in mass quantities for the betterment of mankind.

The basis for the social event of the century was a fish~ting contest to raise money for KW Big Brothers. Each participant (upon receipt of their entry fee) was allowed to fill his/her body cavities (read: mouth only, you sick pigs) with the largest mass con­sumption of fish he could possibly contain(The results were measured in raw poundage). For the he-men/ she-ras of the applied sciences, there were many rewards to be reaped. Erst prize consisted of an immaculately crafted, exquisite marble and gold, fish trophy. The trophy however, stayed at Joey's Only to immortalize the win­ner for all time. He gets to take home a lousy walkman instead.

Some notable occurrences during this euphoric event included: male and overall fish-god: Lukas Vos -ate 60 ounces of fish (Overall)

fish-dominatrix: Amy McCleverty -ate 39.5 ounces of fish (Female) human vacuum cleaner: Brad Duck -ate 25 ounces in 5 minutes (Speed) Rulers of the Universe: Elecom'99 -ate a combined 25 Ibs,3 ounces ITeam)

FInally (drum roll, please ... ) The EngSoc Executive Showdown. It is to be noted that Brian Vidler, (your esteemed President) could not manage to eat

half as much fish as his'most-honourable VP-Fmance Mike Worry. It was tense at the table for a few short moments, but eventually Worry came flying through with a com­fortable lead of a 1/4 ounce to spare!

The event was a resounding success, raising a total of $500 for Big Brothers!! Many thanks to the following people and organizations: -Joey's Only manager Chuck for all that great fish & chips that he donated free of

charge for this great cause. Thanks, Chuck. -Oliver Testelin-Dumetz for going insane with me along the way, especially at 4:30

in the morning trying to figure out why the godforsaken printers in engineering wouldn't print a ridiculous piece of text art, thereby delaying our promotional cam­paigt\ ruining sleep patterns, and annihilating any chance at a sociallife ... well you get the picture(unless of course, it wouldn't print for you either).

-Geoff and 'Nessa for proof-reading this article. Where would I be without you guys?Guys? ... Guys?...Come back ..

Misguided Musings Tim Burns 1A Comp

W:y do those large erasers, the Staedler or Pink Pearl size, exist when nobody ever finishes them? I have wondered about this for a long time, and receiving one such eraser in my graphics kit brought some

old thoughts to the fore. I have never finished one, nor do I know of anybody who has, but everybody has used an eraser. (If you have finished one, e-mail me - taburns®Wheel, 1'd love to hear from you.) I like to call this lithe mystery of the perpetual eraser". Why does it take on such monstrous dimensions when it can never be entirely used up?

Oearly there is a flaw in our free market economy. If the eraser is never finished, then at some point it is either thrown out, or lost, or it goes wherever all unfinished erasers go, and becomes waste. Waste is a form of inefficiency and, in theory at least, a free market economy should move to an equilibrium of greatest efficiency. Neverthe­less these erasers have been made for years, lining the pockets of the greedy eraser manufactures.

So here are some tips. Cut your eraser into quarters: for some reason, this is below the 'critical mass' and each quarter does in fact get used up. Buy smaller erasers: these are also close to the critical mass. H you are totally averse to erasin& then use a pen: no option to eiase, unless of course you tear a hole in the page, but that'.sanother matter.

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PrezSpews

Happy Oktoberfest! Here is the official spew pertaining to Oktoberfest week, no budget

cuts so please no egg throwing. ' Just yer' cut to da chase stuff fer yer infer­matshun.'

Fish Fish and More Fish! Engineering Society and Joey's Only

Seafood Restaurant raised over $500 for the United Way last Wednesday. A lot of effort was put in by our charities direc­tors, Oli Dumetz and Mitch Valentik from 2A Electrical. I'm not really sure whether to thank them or curse them for making everyone eat that much fish, but it was for a good cause. Of course most of you know by now (and assuming the IW has printed a picture), that I lost a bet against

VP Internal Spews

Greetings and salutations yet again. We're all here 'cause we're not all there, and here's

the place to be because we're entering that tres happy time in the academic calendar that tells uS we' re half way there. Yes folks, we're entering the midterm zone. Good luck to ev ryone on those short tests. I known that everybody out ther has gone to all of their lectures and done all of their assignments so these midtenns should be no problem. For olid proof that there is life after midterms, here's just a few of the things you should mark on your calendars.

There's one movie that comes to mind when you think of Halloween. it's the Rocky Horror Picture Show. Let's have a toast for this fully interactive event hap­pening on October 30 at POETS!

And from the tables of our directors organizing the event )'Vhich proves that you can both dress up an engineer and take them out: the Engineering Semi-For­mal is slated to go on November 3rd.

Mike Worry. Mike bet that he could eat twice as much fish as I could. Well he was right and I had to dress in drag for the Eng Soc meeting. At this time I would like to thank my fashion and wardrobe coordinator, Erin Buchanan for her help and patience. And no I will not dress like that again anytime soon, well at least not for any man .....

Ziga zaga zlga zaga Ole Ole Ole!!! Tonight is Oktoberfest, if you don't

have your ticket yet come down to the Orifice and get it!! Of course you proba­bly waited too long and missed your chance, but I wrote this a week in advance so I don't know. A BIG Ziga zaga ziga zaga Oie Oie Oie!!! to Doron Solomon and Brenda Bouchette who planned this event in the middle of May. We're going to the Waterloo Inn and its guaranteed to be a great time! Happy Oktoberfest! !

Calling All Rambos Ever get to the point in the term where

you might feel better shooting some­body? Of course I never have, but if I did, I would go to play PAINT BALL tomor­row. That's right, Saturday October 14th is Paint Bait organized by Jason Roberts, Chris Sandink, and Brent Mills. Tickets are only $9 and each 100 ammo is only $10. If you go, make sure you request the BFG 9000. When you get it, make sure

Mark this on your calendar because it's going to be the social event of the year! There will be a contest to come up with a theme for this term's semi, and the win­ner will be showered with prizes (they'll get free tickets!).

Have you got musical talent (or are you like me and just think that you do)? We're looking to put together weekly jam sessions to touch on the musical side of

you grin from ear to ear and let out a grand: "Oooh Yeah!!".

Funny Lessons Do you think that the Enginewsletter

could be a bit funnier? If so bring your submissions to the Enginewsletter box, Pete Gordon is dying for some humour guidance, especially after the last couple of issues. So start by telling Pete what the Bf(; stands for in Bf(; 9<XXl.

The new No Glitch Co-op - Do you like it????

Having problems with Coop? Don't know how to tell them you're cheesed off (for lack of a better printable expression)? If so our SAC (Students Advising Coop) representative, Jason Murray, would like to hear from you. Part ofJason's job is to address any concerns that engineering students have about coop. He needs to know what you don't like about coop

though and you should email your concerns to him. His email is

jmurray@cscl.ub.

Semi Talk Hey Friday November 3rd is the Semi

Formal. This year will prove to be the best yet. What is a semi formal? Well lets examine the second word first: formal, enough said. The first word there is the clincher, semi, meaning partially. So come out partially formal, partially what-

engineering. If you can play lead guitar, bass guitar, keyboards, drums or any­thing else (well maybe not spoons; ah, what the heck, sure, spoons!) ,we'd like to hear from you. As well, if you can do lead vocals that would also be excellent. Our goal is to get beginners and people with a little more experience together. If you're interested, just drop a note for myself in the Orifice, or e-mail me at AEFLETCH@mechanica i or A WCAMPBE@chemical. Could you please let us know your talent, experience level and style you like to play.

On a related note, TalEng is coming up on November 9th. If you have a musical group, stand up routine, or other interest­ing talent, drop a note for myself or the arts directors in the Orifice to schedule an audition. Hey; when else will you get the chance to take to the stage in the Boml>­shelter?

WelL everything this term seems to be progressing fairly well from my stand­point, but I'm just one person. I'd like to get some feedback on how everything seems to be unfolding from your stand­point. What did you think of the new

ever, and prepared to have a great time. The evening will include dinner and dancing (no Barry Manilow so there are no other valid excuses!). Information will be available soon, so ask your class reps or come to the orifice and find out more.

Car 54 Where Are You???? I would like to test my email account,

en8-prez@novice. It seems that I'm not getting any messages there, however, I am sure that you are all sending them to me. So in order to conduct this experi­ment I need your help. Once you read this spew, walk directly to a computer ter­minal (don't pass go) and log on. Now this is the easy part, type: mail en8-prez@novice, and mail this sentence:

The purple cow likes green fruit flies because they are (enter any word here).

Now if everybody does this, I will have about 2500 email messages to get through. I would like to see if watstar (or my lab partners) care if I get this many emails. Once you are there, you might as well tell me something else, like what part of Eng Soc you ill<e the best, and what part you hate the most. Remember all correspondence is confidential, so write . If ill ..

Well with that said, I must get home to dress in my traditional Oktoberfest outfit for the Ruby's deal, see you on the bus at 7:30pm

Brian Vidler

things we tried like the Used Book Board (which is soon to become a sublet board)? Do you think w e should install microwaves right in POETS for warming up lunch? Do you like the samosas in the C&D? Do you have any great ideas on something which would look great on a T .shirt? I want to hear what Engsoc ser­vices do you really like and what other services you would like to see. Remem­ber that the Engineering Society is a stu­dent society to serve the engineering stu­dents. Even the Frosh have been around for half the term now, so everyone should have a good idea what's going on. You can either drop a note off in the Orifice addressed to myself, send me an e-mail at AEFLETCH@mechanical, or send a confi­dential e-mail to ENG_PREZ@novice. We want to hear from you!

It's time for me to be going now (study­ing for midterms is not a bad thing). I wish everyone the best of luck on the upcoming midterms, and I'll see every­one on the other side!

Ed Fletcher

E·n·g·S·o·c ·e·w·s VP External Spews

W ell, we arrived safely and without any problems here in Thunderbay for the PEO

conference. I hope that you will have had a great Thanksgiving weekend. I know that mine will have been fairly unproductive. Okay, enough mindless rambling. A lot of stuff will have hap­pened by the time you get this issue so, I'll mention them briefly: the Cannned Food drive, the Red Cross Blood drive, the PEO (Professional Engineers of Ontario) conference, the Women in Engineering conference, and the Proctor and Gamble tour. I'm afraid you'll have to wait until the next Iron Warrior issue to see results of all of the above. Other events that I haven't mentioned are internal events so, talk to Ed. Looks like I wasn't quite done rambling mind­lessly.

WEEFSpews

TIe results are in! This term' s par­ticipation rate in the Voluntary Student Contribution(VSC) was

71 %. Our best participants were the Frosh classes, followed closely by the class of '99. Thank you to all who par­ticipated.

And now for a really big announce­ment

Microsoft Corporation has agreed to make a $5,000 contribution to the WEEP.

So, if you see Bill or any of the other great people at Microsoft remember to say thanks. As soon as we work out the details we will find a much more fitting way to say thank you for this great contri­bution to our school and our future.

VP Finance Spews

I'guess they missed the mud from Frosh Week ...

Hello from the land of joyous ratifica­tions, spirit recovery and the Fmance two­step. Normally the largest problem between VP Finance cl1angeovers is the lack of continuity in record-keeping. Well, just for variety this term the books were in order but the politics were not. I wrote my original IW submission Wednesday night, but rereading it I thought I'd just start from scratch. Let's just say I was not impressed. I'm sure I'll get over it, but I have this nagging question - if this is the way Eng50c treats its most involved

Keep your eyes open for more informa­tion about a party with Queen's Universi­ty (yes the batch party). I would like to know if you have any input on dates, times etc .. .! hope I can accommodate everyone who is interested. Just come by the orifice and let me know.

On a not so happy note: The Plummer's Pledge (donations made by student after they graduate) has been experiencing a very serious lack of participation. With a new provincial budget coming along, that doesn't look too good for post-secondary education, the VSC and Plummer's Pledge are becoming more and more important. So if you are in fourth year and would like to help raise participation drop a note in the WEEF box in the Orifice.

Also, proposal forms are now available in the Orifice. If you think you know where some of this term's $5O,COO should be spent, fill out a proposal form. They are due back in the WEEF box by Oct. 27. An instruction sheet, in case you need more info, will be available in the Orifice as well.

members, how can L in good conscience, encourage others to run for Exec?

I mean, heck, I love having my dirty laundry dragged in front of Council as much as the next guy. I thought a discus­sion of ratification might include a few good things I'd done as well? A system of approval has to be questioned when a complete stranger who's done absolutely nothing has a better chance of emerging unscathed.

But then there are some confused people out there. I was watching the news after the OJ trial, and this lady off the street was talking about how she was "really glad OJ was found innocent, because he has kids. It must have been really hard for them to see their father go

I would also like to know your opinions on Women in Engineering here at Water­loo. What does it do for you? V\'hat do you think it can do for you? Do 'ou think it can be changed? I want to know what you think so I can bring this to the Women in Engineering group and if whal the offer can be improved upon.

I know I've said this before, but if yow' interested in helping out with CES ( on­gress of Canadian Engineers of Ontario), the week long conference Waterloo is fWl­

ning in January, just ,"!rite me a note. If you're just curious, and want to kI10\ more about it, again, just leave a note in my box.

Well I've said about all I want to say. If there is anything you would like to see done, just come down to the Orifice and let us know. We'll do our best to accom­modate you. Good luck on midtenns!

Nicole Alxan'U5

Derek Tokarski

through this." Excuse m ? Whal relation is there between somebody having hil­dren and if they murdered two peopl ? There was also a man speaking how he knew OJ was innocent all along and tl'l<lt this was a "sham cooked up by white sci­entists. There's no diff rence b tween white blood and black blood. TI,is lrial proves that all blood is equaL" Hello? DNA testing? High school education?

On a more financial note, there has been a new fridge purchased for the C&O. Thanks to Mary for making the arrange­ments. The repair bills on the old fridge were getting quite unreasonable. We've also budgeted to purchase some badly needed IW computer equipment. POEIS may see some improvements - there'

EngSoc Calendar

October 13 TONIGHT! Oktoberfestat Ruby'S Bu..<;<;ing subsidi7..t..'t.i by Et,SSoc Tickets available in the Orificr

0d0bel'14 Paintballat (;ot·Ya!

0d0ber16 Midterms Commence

October 18 EngSoc Meeting #3 inDC1302

0ct0'ber29 Joint Council RSVP in the Orifice

been tc,lk of rcpl.lcing lh ,pom (ridg) and buying SOffit' mkn)w"Vl'~ to rcdu ' lIlt'load on th' &OonC'S. If lh(.'rc clre any questions about the bud~ ,t, pI '(\S (~l

f rc to t<l1k to 111 befon' lIw nexl ouncil meeting.

[' d like to wekom) my two finance directors, Phil and Larry. Both of them seem quile qualified and quit eager to get involved, and I thank them in advance for their help. Looking forward to a great tcnn - there arc aU kiJ.1ds of events on the horizon: Oktoberfcst, EngW 'k, Sandford Heming Debates, Mudbowl and Indoor Soccer jusl to name a few. Hope to see you there!

Michael Worn)

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