The Golden Path

7/28/2019 The Golden Path

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TThhee

GGoollddeennPPaatthh

By Ashram Kain

Edited by Indigo Matthews


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Dedicated to all of my good friends who have helped me grow

And to all those people who deserved better from me


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Preface

As I begin this paragraph, in the prologue to the first book ofthree, I am twenty-eight years old, while small I doubt I will

finish this text in the next day, week, month, or year.

I tell you this because I believe it is important for you

understand that the man who has begun this text will not be

the same man that finishes it, just as you will not be thesame reader who finishes this text. As we take this journey,

we will grow, we will evolve, and we will, I hope, reach an

apotheosis. To understand how and why, I must explain

what this text is. But before I do, I must ask you to do me a

favor, my reader, whoever you are: Please read this text

through to its end. Walk with me along this road andcomplete this journey, regardless of your bias, your beliefs,

or your convictions, even if only to tell me Im wrong, please,

finish this text with me, it is not long, but it does matter.

With that said, what I hope to discover with you is a method

of rational thought and mindfulness, which anyone can applyto achieve lasing happiness. I will not try to convince you of

any ideas, I will not try to convert you to my way of thinking.

I will only ask you that you think, at times in new ways, at

times in ways that may not be immediately comfortable. I

will no doubt struggle to choose my words very carefully, if

at times I use a word in a context that does not immediatelymake sense, or it is one with which you are not familiar, do

not be discouraged at all. Learning new things helps us all

grow; be willing to learn and to question it if you do not

immediately agree or understand.


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This is not a self-help book. If you want mantras or self-

actualizations, please look elsewhere. If you want to be rich,

successful and confident, I am sure that you could be, but I

dont think this text will cover it. But, if you want happiness,

truth, understanding, and maybe a bit of freedom, we

should continue. If you dont want to come along, I

understand, and will be waiting for you when you are ready.

I cannot yet imagine what each chapter in each book will

contain, nor will it be an easy task to for us to understand

this method. I can tell you that first we must examine the

mind, thinking, and learn to question. Second, we must

question ourselves, the nature of emotional investment,

happiness, and thought. Lastly, we must apply the first and

second we must master thought, decision, and choice.

To do this, any of this, we must draw upon a hundred

thousand years of human history, knowledge, and evolution.

We will draw upon great thinkers and philosophers and we

will extract the abstract essence of their ideas.

I am eager to begin, I hope you are too.


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Book one: Meditations

Small StepsEverything we do, each act, takes time. The more factors,

the more moving pieces, the more time. Time is in a

metaphorical essence (and in many non-metaphorical ways),

the energy that drives all things forward, but time can only

become work as long as the time is being used, otherwise it

flows right by. To gain any ability you must use the time to

practice, and with practice you will grow. To accomplish any

small feat takes an infinite number of smaller feats of which

you are likely unaware. This is what allows for gradual

change: a number of far smaller far less profound plateaus.

You have already reached one, in reading andcomprehending the paragraph above. You may have had

similar thoughts before but it has never been put exactly like

that before, and that new knowledge has created new

pathways in your brain. If youre quick youll already know

what Im about to say in principle: What I hope to

accomplish will take time and an infinite number of small

feats. You will have those moments of sudden epiphany, but

they will be spread out over a period time. Do not expect

instant results, instead, expect to put in the time necessary

to move your mind forward.

Human learning is a complicated subject with many facets.

What we will focus on now in this book is the principle of

rational thought; that is practicing thinking methods that are

constructive and healthy, while identifying unhealthy

methods. This will take many small steps to master.


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Thinking

You may rightfully believe you know how to think, and may

indeed be capable of thinking. If you questioned for amoment whether or not you know how to think rationally,

you probably just did. The key to thinking is questioning. To

think properly we must first be willing to question, by this I

mean to have intellectual curiosity of those things we

experience, our thoughts and our actions. As we are exposed

to new ideas and knowledge we must accept them, andquestion them. This is the definition of open mindedness,

always accepting and thinking about new ideas. This is not to

say we should at all time doubt things, ourselves or others,

rather what I mean is we must always look at situations and

be willing to question what we know and what we think we

know. The more you are certain of any fact, feeling, or belief

you hold, the more you should be willing to question it. To

question a thought or feeling ask:

Does this thought help me accomplish any tasks or goals?

Is this thought based on observable evidence?

Can I test this thought to see if it is true or false?

If the answer is yes to all of the above, this knowledge,

feeling, or belief that you have questioned, has withstood

your inquiry and examination. These are valid objects for

making decision and forming new ideas. If you answered noto even one, then the idea, knowledge or feeling is invalid,

and should be considered less useful for making choices.


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Consider why we call these ideas or feelings valid or invalid;

valid ideas are ones that can be understood rationally and

help us accomplish things, valid ideas can also be proven to

be invalid if they eventually lose their usefulness. Invalid

ideas are either not useful to us, have no evidence to

support them as a conclusion, or cannot be proven to be

true or false. This means they cannot be used to make

rational decisions. Would you want someone making choices

for you based on ideas that were harmful, had no basis inevidence, or were beyond your ability to prove or question?

Of course not!

Questioning is not the same a doubting. Do not let doubt

sabotage good ideas. Question your doubt if your doubt

can be questioned, you were right to second guess an idea, if

it cannot, then your doubt is baseless, and you should act on

the healthy thoughts you have.

Thinking is the ability to accept and question knowledge,

feelings, or beliefs to ascertain their validity.


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Feeling

Few things are as wholly misunderstood as our feelings, and

few languages are as poor at expressing the depth andbreadth of human emotion as English. In psychology we

associate emotions with stimuli, behavior, mood,

temperament, and personality. Biochemically, emotions are

observable responses in the brain that while honed by

experience seem, all too often, beyond our control.

This Idea, that our emotions are beyond our control, is a very

common fallacy.

Many emotional responses are instinctual knowledge that,

devoid of reason, would enable an organism to survive and

reach some measure of success. However, we are beings

with reason, and we must think about our emotions

question and validate thus we can address our feelings.

The first step to self-control, discipline, and mastery of our

emotions is simply questioning them. Ask why you feel each

powerful emotion and you will often find it no longer

controls your behavior. There is nothing at all wrong with

feeling, so long as we understand why we feel the way we

do, and we do not make choices ruled by feelings we dont

fully understand.

The reason for this is to prevent bad habits and keep others

from dictating our actions through emotional bias such as

fear, desires, or loneliness. These are often exploited, and

very rarely questioned in everyday life.


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One of the most common methods by which we are

manipulated and deceived is through emotional appeals.

This is called Pathos, and is one of the three methods of

persuasion; it is also the method most commonly used to

deceive us. This is why questioning our feelings rationally is

so important, when presented with a situation where

someone or thing is appealing solely to your emotions, trying

to invoke strong overpowering feelings, they are often trying

to prevent you from thinking.

When you are presented with strong emotional appeals,

especially fear, practice thinking about the feelings you have.

This makes you the master of your emotions.

Feelings are good; understanding our feelings is better.Question what you feel, and why, to rule your emotions.


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Practice

Long ago people realized that with enough small steps you

can accomplish great things; the mind is absolutely nodifferent. This process, of repeating behavior over and over

in iteration, it is called practice. The more you practice a

pattern of thinking the better at it you become. To think and

master feeling takes practice questioning your ideas, feelings

and beliefs.

To practice this internal examination question all knowledge

and feelings, and question new information and new

situations. By practicing this kind of thinking, you learn to

see the truth in yourself and in the world around you. And

remember, we learn by doing small steps, each act is an

improvement over the last.

Just as you repeat the act of thinking and questioning, repeat

the thoughts that you have examined and found to be

helpful. This grows the ability to think new thoughts that are

rational, provable, and healthy. Furthermore it makes your

ability to question stronger and more able to adapt to newsituations, problems, and dilemmas.

Repeatedly think about new and old ideas, practice

questioning and repeating valid thoughts.


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However, this same process of repetition and practice can

also lead to self destructive behavior and delusions.

Repeating bad ideas over and over will ingrain them deeply

in the mind, it is the basis for many mental disorders,

delusions, and cognitive dissonance. This is why you must

question each thought and feeling:

Does this thought help me accomplish any tasks or goals?

Is this thought based on observable evidence?

Can I test this thought to see if it is true or false?

If the answer is No to any of the above, the thought is

destructive, and probably not something you want to base

choices on. This helps prevent delusions and breaks down

bad thoughts in our mind.

Ultimately, these things take practice and iteration to

master. Consistently practicing this kind of questioning will

build up a resistance to bad ideas and help you overcome old

ones, but only through practice, time, and consistency.

Practice thinking by questioning your thoughts, the things

you learn, what you think you know, and what you feel.


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Evidence

We have discussed thinking and questioning what we know

and whether it is valid. To discern if anything we think or feelis valid we must also accept evidence. Simply because an

idea or feeling has evidence to back it does not make it true,

rather, only if an idea or feeling has evidence that can

withstand scrutiny of observation and explains our idea or

feeling, or is explained by the idea, we can consider it valid

evidence for forming our thoughts and feelings.

Evidence cannot be its own validation, you would not believe

a police-officer who threw you in jail and told you he was

right, because he said he was right. You would want a Jury

and Judge and a fair trial. Just as we question ideas, we must

question our evidence for ideas to prevent delusion.

We do this so that a valid idea, thought, or feeling is one we

can use to make choices. This is paramount you must think

about (question and observe) evidence for ideas, thoughts,

and feelings to make good choices.

If any idea or feeling has no evidence or source the idea

cannot be proven wrong, therefore it is invalid, because we

cannot properly question or understand the idea. If the idea

or feeling is caused by another idea or feeling, we must

question that idea or feeling, and if that idea or feeling has

no evidence, it is also invalid.

The key to thinking about your ideas is respecting the need

for evidence or correctness for an idea or feeling.


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Mindfulness

For our purposes, mindfulness is an awareness of self and

our surroundings in any given moment. Practicingmindfulness allows us to examine others and our selves, be

keenly aware of our bodies, thoughts, feelings, and the

actions of others around us. Awareness and wisdom grow

from mindfulness.

For those that have never experienced this kind of mental

state, it can be exceedingly challenging at first. A

mindfulness state requires considering each thought as it

arises, being aware of the sensations of the body and

environment, and not succumbing to distraction or negative

thought patterns.

To be mindful requires practice, but explaining how to

practice mindfulness is a serious challenge that has confused

and confounded eastern philosophers for millennia, and

psychologists recently for decades. However, mindfulness is

a constant ever present thing, you dont need to follow strict

steps and spend an hour a day being mindful. Yet we stillneed a guide, to show us where to begin practicing mindful

thought.

But the truth is, if you have practiced thinking about the

thoughts and feelings you have in any moment, you have

begun practicing mindfulness. We can develop mindfulness

by taking a quiet moment, and considering all those things in

our mind, surroundings, and what we are doing and feeling.

Think on these, consider their validity. Be present in the

moment and in your mind. This is mindfulness.


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Mindfulness is awareness born from practicing thinking. As

you develop your ability to question and experience

understanding of your thoughts, feelings, and ideas, you

develop mindfulness.

It becomes clear which are successful ideas and which arent

as you question more and more of our thoughts and feelings.

Thoughts that are destructives stand out as they inhibit your

ability to perform or succeed, they lack any basis in

evidence, or they cannot be tested.

To be Mindful, be present in the moment and aware of

your thoughts and feelings as they come.

Try to focus on the things that are happening now, right

around you, and inside you.


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Book Two: Truths

Lasting HappinessIt is a difficult subject to broach with people, that of

happiness and its definition. People have very interesting

and wholly destructive ideas of happiness, and few have

ever been contradicted. Worse, English is a rather poor

language to discuss the topic, as most emotional topics,

because it is very short of finite and specific words for

emotional states.

Because this idea is so nebulous and so complicated I want

to first clearly define what I mean when I say Lasting

Happiness, and what that isnt. It is important because ideas

like bliss, contentment, even comfort and safety are notlasting happiness, but often confused with lasting happiness,

or worse, sought in place of lasting happiness. So what is

lasting happiness?

Lasting Happiness is a ground state of optimistic,

content well-being. When I say ground state, Imean when all other stimuli and impetuses have

been removed, the state of mind is one that is

optimistic, alert, content, and accepting.

Because Lasting Happiness becomes the ground state, the

normal position of the mind, this happiness will pervade all

other aspects of life. This state will breed benevolence and

confidence which in turn create further happiness.

Unfortunately, most societies fail to recognize this for a

variety of reasons. People who have attained lasting


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happiness tend often to question authority and bring about

innovative new ideas. Most cultural ideas of happiness are

transitory happiness, the kind that can be lost in an instant,

or require consistent gratification.

The truth is that love, wealth, entertainment, indulgences,

narcotics, and sexual gratifications are all often confused

with or cited as sources of happiness. While all these things

will bring about bliss, and even joy, none will create lasting

happiness.

Once achieved, lasting happiness cannot be stolen, lost or

taken in life. It will always be a part of your thoughts and

feelings and define you.

People with Lasting Happiness have no need of Stone Agemorals and antiquated dogmas, they dont harm other

people. Why? Because lasting happiness is watered by other

peoples happiness. In the success of others we find the keys

to our own success. In others happiness is a community that

is happy, successful, and free of the petty demons of

jealousy, greed, and violence. All this things are thesymptoms of an unhappy mind.

Stop wanting to be happy and just smile.

Fake it if you have to.


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That was the first step, and it is the only one that is easy,

because the rest of the trials and complications that come

with seeking lasting happiness are not simple, are difficult to

understand, and will test our world view.

We will not achieve happiness by sitting there reading this

wanting happiness, you will achieve it by smiling and

thinking about things rationally, practicing happiness. You

wouldnt expect to achieve getting to the store by sitting on

the couch wanting to get to the store would you? No, you

achieve getting there by getting up and taking one step at a

time until, before you know it, youre there.

Lasting Happiness is the same way so lets keep walking.

The second step you have hopefully already taken, and thatis thinking and developing mindfulness. To move forward we

need to understand what creates lasting happiness.

Lasting Happiness is built upon a foundation of mindfulness,

wise emotional investments, ownership of successes, and

firm correctness in decisions.

The journey is getting interesting, Let us move forward and

confront emotional investments, owning success and

failures, and succeeding more when we do fail.


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Realize Emotional Investments

We only have so much emotional effort to give, and where

we are investing that effort is very important if you want toachieve lasting happiness. Part of lasting happiness is being a

wise investor of emotional effort; knowing what gives a solid

emotional return, and what does not, and how to spot an

emotional sinkhole.

Everything we let in to our lives requires an emotional

investment; some measure of emotional effort is spent on

everything, from our job, hobbies, loved ones or friends, to

our problems, worries, debts and conflicts.

Investing emotional effort is just like investing money you

should only invest it in things that have a high return rate:

people who treat you well, jobs that are rewarding, hobbies

that are fulfilling, and problems you can solve. When we

begin investing in things that have little or no return; people

who treat us poorly, jobs we hate, problems we cannot

solve, or conflicts that are self-perpetuating, we quickly run

out of emotional energy and must borrow that energyfrom somewhere.

We borrow this from our lasting happiness. This creates

emotional debt, a state of stressed exhaustion brought

about by poor emotional investments eating up our

emotional effort and then burning away our lasting

happiness with interest.


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When thinking about our emotional investments, we can use

the basic criteria set forth in book one to analyze each thing

we have invested emotional effort in:

Does this investment help me accomplish any tasks or goals?

Does this investment return based on observable evidence?

Can I test this investment to see if it is positive or negative?

This is a great chance to practice thinking; looking at thethings in your life, what is rewarding, what is not? If the

answer is No to any of these, then withdrawing your

investment and letting go of this element in your life is

essential to your wellbeing.

But letting go is easier said than done, isnt it? After all,youre invested.

Practice thinking you know this investment is bad, you can

demonstrate it is bad because it fails to meet criteria for a

good investment. Making bad investments with your

emotional effort does not make you feel better, nor does itmake you a good person.

We want to be good people, because benevolence waters

our own happiness. Yet we also want to be able to share our

happiness in the form of emotional effort invested in people

and things that return to us happiness. A common myth is

that good people sacrifice their happiness for another

persons.

This is an incredible lie, and it uses pathos to deceive us,

because we want to be good and benevolent.


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Good people elevate the happiness of others through

sharing a little bit more emotional effort than they initially

receive, if they will receive more from this investment than

they gave. If someone in your life is constantly taking your

emotional effort, and never has any to give they are a thief

stealing from you.

Being a good person means investing emotional effort wisely

to elevate peoples happiness, not sacrificing your own

energy and wellbeing for others. By elevating their happiness

you create a healthy cycle of emotional returns for them,

and for yourself.

The more you consider your good investment vs. your bad

investments the easier it will be to withdraw your effort

from them. Letting go of investments means slowly limiting

their place in your life, each time more effort is required

question why you should and if there is a return. If there is

not, do not continue to invest. This is a process that takes

time and practice.

Worrying about issues we cannot or will not be able to solveis a poor investment there will be no return and it takes a

lot of emotional effort.

Addressing small problems in your life that you have a

solution for already is a great investment because the return

is slightly higher than the original effort.


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Own Success and Failure

Taking responsibility is often associated with taking the

blame (or stealing anothers glory) for some failure oraccomplishment. But ownership has a very different

connotation. When we hear ownership we think of

possession, physicality, and maybe responsibility.

When I speak of owning both successes and failures, I dont

mean taking responsibility or getting bragging rights, I mean

that you need to take possession of each decision you made,

you need to think about the things that led to that success or

failure and why. Remember, when I say think, I mean

question and analyze. In owning each success and each

failure you make them a part of you and your story, you

learn from them how to repeat successes and how toprevent failures. This is accomplished by simply thinking

about each and how you behaved, where your emotional

effort investments were at the time of each, and what

qualified as a positive return.

There is more to understanding ownership, but we need toexamine other elements of decision making first. For now we

can understand that lasting happiness is impacted by our

ability to accept ownership of our successes as much as our

failure, from here we can grow an understanding of choices

and why we make them. By thinking we can develop

mindfulness and learn to be aware of ourselves and ourenvironment, simply by observing and questioning, and most

importantly, practicing thinking.


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Succeed More When You Fail

This is really the basic foundation of lasting happiness. In

many cases our mistakes and failures haunt us. If we arepracticing thinking, rather than recriminate ourselves for our

mistakes we can critically analyze them, why we took that

action, and what ideas we gained from it. We can determine

valid vs. invalid ideas and emotions form this. Most

importantly we can learn from what happened by

questioning our thoughts and feelings.

Bad things do not happen to us because of karma or fate

Bad things do not happen because of some supernatural

force at work in the universe. We do not suffer for some

beings grand plan or evil forces working against us.

Bad things happen because we are either in the wrong place

at the wrong time or we make choices that bring about

misfortune. This is hard to accept but it is true.

When faced with mistakes, challenges, and failures you

should practice thinking; why did you think that way, why

did you feel that way, was it beneficial, was there any

evidence to support these thoughts or feelings, can these

thoughts or feelings be proven true or false?

These basic questions can help you understand, and more

importantly, not repeat mistakes and failures.


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Book Three: The Golden Path

ActualizationBook One and Book Two laid out a framework of ideas to

support and hopefully help us reach the following concepts.

Understanding the above was essential to understanding the

following.

We have been armed with an understanding of whatthinking is and how to do it. You have been presented with

an idea of lasting happiness, why it is good, and been shown

some of the obstacles that prevent you from achieving it. So

let us begin understanding how to live happily.

Lasting Happiness is actualized by accepting that choicesonce made cannot be changed, you cannot doubt choices;

such requires that decisions are made and accepted

equanimously, with calm consideration.

Accept and own our choices; they cannot be changed, but

we cannot let ourselves feel regret or resigned to these

choices. They are our own. Own them.

Each decision, if you have thought about it, you must accept

with firm correctness this is the acceptance that there was

no other choice you could have made given the same

information and situation, you have to understand that you

were doing the right thing if you have been mindful and

have thought about the things that drove you to this choice

then it was the right thing.


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Firm Correctness

This is a term borrowed with some interpretation from

Chinese. It can be summarized as simply this:

Do the right thing by your choices.

The right thing this is not an ambiguous idea; morality,

ethics and all the social constructs can be ignored.

The right thing is the choice that maintains your lastinghappiness while supporting the wellbeing of those around

you. I do not imply this is simple.

There is no choice that harms another person that brings

about lasting happiness, and there is no choice that harms

you that brings about lasting happiness. Encouraging thelasting happiness in others builds the firmament of your own

happiness through benevolence.

To act in firm correctness we must think about our thoughts

and feelings, questioning whether our actions are rational;

you must consider why you make each choice, understand

them and yourself. And we must help others think and

understand themselves and their choices.

We must stand by our choices, especially when wrong.

In acting with firm correctness we act rationally, with

mindfulness and consideration, and we make choices that

are beneficial for ourselves and others.


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Benevolence Grows Happiness

Perhaps you are beginning to realize lasting happiness is

cultivated by acceptance of your choices and making choicesyou think are the right thing because you have used reason

and evidence to evaluate them.

The next step is to fertilize happiness in yourself and the

world around you. This is accomplished through firm

correctness, treating others with respect, and encouraging

their happiness through rational thought; sowing the seeds

of lasting happiness in their minds.

Helping others will fertilize your mind for happiness, and

creates a lasting feeling of success. Beyond the mental

effects, as you help others you will create lasting positive

impacts on their lives that may grow in to loyal friendships,

and may also help you identify those who only take but do

not reciprocate your benevolence.

This increases the social happiness of your immediate

environment, and by extension removes elements that may

inhibit the development of your lasting happiness. To

understand this, we must understand our emotional

investments and avoid emotional debt.

Employ benevolence and wise emotional investments to

create an environment of lasting happiness, within, and

with-out.


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Choice Hypotheses

The final step to Lasting Happiness is the understanding of

choices, and learning to make Choice Hypotheses.

Making a choice and owning the decision is a process of

commitment and learning. Each choice is a hypothesis,

which is experimentally tested by the outcome. The next

time the situation is similar, looking at the validation or

invalidation of the choice determines the course of action.

This prepares you to repeat good choices, and by owning

choices frees you from regret and resentment.

Testing emotional process is difficult and challenging. If you

feel a way about a choice, the best option is to remain

uninvolved or to choose something opposing your feelings,

so that you can observe the validity of your awareness and

emotional responses. You must remember these key

decisions, however, and keenly observe the outcome.

From this you will learn when to trust your instincts and

emotions, and when not to. You will learn what choices youare ill equipped to make and those where you are acutely

aware of the most desired outcome.

This experimental method is the accumulation of all of the

above, and it means making mistakes, sometimes

intentionally, so that you may learn from them.


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Choose Happiness

Finally, Lasting Happiness is a choice, one we must commit

to, and it is difficult. It is unfortunate that we have heard thisso often that the power of the statement is lost.

Lasting Happiness means owning even the most disastrous

outcomes as your own and accepting them, it means owning

every misfortune, every ounce of powerlessness, and

building happiness by rationally considering all the things in

your past you cannot change.

Because you can change what becomes of tomorrow.

You have an entire life of experiences and information upon

which to learn and make better choices, you have the

faculties to think, question, and reason a solution to all of

your problems.

The Golden Path is one you walk a step at a time. It is paved

in rational thought, open mindedness, and awareness. It is

happiness that cannot be stolen, taken, or touched.

We have begun that path.


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Final Thoughts

I encourage you to question and think about my conclusions. I am in no

way shape or form wholly responsible for the sum accumulated

information that informed my conclusions and I encourage you to look

into these subjects for yourself.

My thoughts on thinking and valid thoughts are fundamentally identical tothe basic principles of the scientific method, as well as rudimentary logic

and critical thinking.

I extensively researched the work by Matthieu Ricard, Nancy Etcoff, and

Daniel Kahneman in understanding happiness and peak human

experience. For much information about neurological aspects of happiness

I looked closely at the work of Dan Gilbert, and Srikumar Rao.

Mindfulness as an idea presented here is a synthesis and extrapolation of

ideas in Buddhist, Zen, and Taoist philosophy and strongly encouraged by

the work of Jon Kabat-Zinn, whom I encourage you to look into if

awareness-based cognitive development is of any interest.

Lastly the idea for this book was inspired by the 14th Dalai Lama, Jetsun

Jamphel Ngawang Lobsang Yeshe Tenzin Gyatso who once said thatreligion has a foundation in nurturing the happiness and spiritual needs of

people, and will not disappear until a secular philosophy arises to fill that

need. Im paraphrasing, that is not exactly his quote.

Any mistakes, fallacies, or faults in this work are, however, mine and mine

alone and should not be attributed to any of the wonderful and brilliant

minds whose ideas informed me.

Thank you for reading.

I hope you gained something worth having from this.

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The Golden Path