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Bereavement Ontario Network

20th Annual Conference

The Future of Bereavement Care: Honouring Stories and Embracing Needs

Conference Booklet

Geneva Park YMCA Conference Centre - Orillia, Ontario

Pre-Conference Workshops Wednesday, October 20, 2010 ~ 9:00 to 4:00

Conference Wednesday, October 20, ~ 4:00 to Friday Oct. 22, ~ 2:00

Table of Contents

Page 1 …………………………………….. Pre-Conference Workshop Descriptions Page 2 & 3 ……………………………..…………………………. Plenary Speakers Page 4, 5, 6, 7, &8 ………………………..….…... Concurrent Workshop Descriptions Page 9 ..………….…………………….……………………….Conference Schedule Page 10 ……………………………………………... Conference Registration Form Page 11……………………………..………………...………..…Workshop Choices Page 12…………………..Conference Details and the Dr. Jack Morgan Scholarship Page 13 ………………………..…… BON Application Form for 2010 Membership Page 14……………………………………...…………... Directions to Geneva Park

Stories are the creative conversion of life itself into a more powerful, clearer, more meaningful experience. They are the currency of human contact.

Robert McKee

Page 1

Pre- Conference Workshops Wednesday October 20 – 9:00 to 4:00

OPTION ONE

Stories Well Beyond the Grave:   Narrative Therapy and Grief Work 

WORKSHOP DESCRIPTION

So many therapeutic metaphors and practices emphasize closure and moving on as the primary markers of healthy grief and mourning. Those who can't or won't move on have often been seen as "resistant" or experiencing some form of "pathological grief". Narrative Therapy, as well as helping us to accept and say good-bye to those aspects of a relationship that have truly died, has opened new doors to "Saying Hello!" to the ongoing relationship with our loved ones that has always transcended death.

WHAT YOU WILL LEARN

This one day pre‐conference workshop will provide participants with:  

An introduction/review of the maps of Narrative Practice that pertain directly to grief and mourning.

An understanding of the unique contributions Narrative Therapy makes to grief counselling, including

Michael White's Saying Hullo Again practices and the work of Lorraine Hedke and John Winslade,

authors of Re-membering Lives: Conversations with the Dying and Bereaved.

An understanding of the ways in which Narrative Practices assist clients in appreciating and

developing on-going relationships with deceased loved ones.

An opportunity to witness a live Narrative Therapy interview and participate (optionally) as an outsider witness.

LEADERS William Cooke, MSW, RSW, RMFT, M.Div. and Margotte Kaczanowska, MA, RSW OPTION TWO

Release…Rejuvenate…Replenish

Self Care and Grief Work Workshop Description: As caregivers in everyday life we listen to the stories of clients, colleagues, friends, and family so as to be supportive. In doing so we have witnessed the power of “Being Listened To”, and realize listening is a most valuable and necessary resource for living life well. We as caregivers must utilize this resource for our own “Well Being”, by listening to ourselves. Here is where we will find our own best answers for Releasing our Burdens… Rejuvenating our Being… and Replenishing our Spirit.

WHAT YOU WILL LEARN This one day preconference workshop will provide participants with:

• An exploration of an “Enhanced Sense of Listening”. • An understanding of the influence of Self-Talk, the Unconscious Listening to Self. • An examination of methods, techniques and tools to boost Listening Memory. • An opportunity to experience the deep and profound act of “Listening In the Moment”.

LEADER: Susan McCoy, BSc., MSc.Psychology, Diploma AEd., Certified Acupressure Practitioner

Page 2 Conference Moderator:

Carol Poduch Carol is a powerful and sought after inspirational speaker who draws on personal experiences while addressing the topics of grief, life after loss and the emerging topic of post traumatic growth as it relates to grief and related life trauma. Carol will guide participants through the conference.

Plenary Sessions

Opening Plenary

Dr. Darcy Harris

• Professor and Coordinator of Thanatology at King's University College • Faculty, Coordinator at Kings University College at the University of Western Ontario

Thursday Morning Plenary

Dr. Bill Webster Dr Bill Webster is a grief counsellor, author, TV host and increasingly well known international speaker. He brings a unique blend of personal experience, academic education and many years of practical application to his work. Acknowledged as a dynamic, personable and practical communicator, Dr. Bill Webster combines his own story with his knowledge and sense of humour to effectively communicate his message.

Page 3 Thursday Afternoon Plenary

Kelly Walker His books are wonderful, his concerts are uplifting, but Kelly Walker IS a speaker. He walks the talk and it shows in his presentations. Kelly is one of Canada’s experts on the questions of transition, change, and burnout. He brings the most controlled audiences to their feet when he addresses crowds from 50 to 5000. He is wise, current and fun. A man who began his speaking career as a preacher in the Dominican Order (the Order of Preachers), he has continued to inspire, inform and confront audiences throughout North America by his fresh and authentic style of presentation. He will lead your audience from laughter to tears as he explores with them the human dimensions of transition and change. He is able to speak to the true issues that humans face since he has experienced them personally. Also, as a former priest and therapist, he has guided thousands of people through their journeys. Closing Plenary: The Power To Change

Cate Gibson – Powerful Journey Consulting

Powerful Journey Consulting was developed to assist in the recognition and prevention of unnecessary human stress. Cate Gibson utilizes her Powerful Journey techniques to teach individuals how to tackle the deep structural problems that cause stress in your work and home environment. Cate’s presentation will explore the power of change in your work and home life.

When Stories nestle in the body, soul comes forth. —Deena Metzger

Page 4 Concurrent Workshop Sessions

Session One (Thursday 11:00 am – 12:30 pm)

Session One A - (Thursday 11:00 am – 12:30 pm)

Workshop Title: Leaning Towards the Deathless— Mindful Engagement of Death, Dying & Bereavement This experiential workshop will explore some of the key concepts and practices from Buddhism that point away from and bridge the gap between the relative world of birth, death and suffering, and the absolute realm beyond suffering—The Deathless (aka Nirvana). Participants will gain some comfort and familiarity with how the essentials of Buddhist doctrine itself apply directly to the difficulties of death, dying and bereavement. Presenter: Brad Hunter—therapist and meditation teacher specializing in anxiety, trauma, grief and depression.

Session One B - (Thursday 11:00 am – 12:30 pm) "Finding Hope in Grief" The participants in this workshop will examine what "Hope" means to them in their life, what hinders people from finding hope and how the bereaved can regain their hope. This workshop will raise the awareness of hope as an integral part of the grieving process and will encourage caregivers to model hope to those in their care Presenter: John Saynor – Priest, Author – Genesis Bereavement Resources

Session One C - (Thursday 11:00 am – 12:30 pm)

Teen Grief Resources This practical workshop will examine current resources about teenage grief: websites, DVD’s, books, on-line articles, activities and technical tools to help nurture teens during their grief process. Participants will be encouraged to share information about their favourite resources. Presenter: Fran King B.A., B.Ed., C.B.E., C.G.T. Educational Consultant and Grief Therapist is a popular speaker on Teen Grief across the province and has a private practice in the Durham Region.

Page 5

Session One D - (Thursday 11:00 am – 12:30 pm) Workshop Title: Kundalini Yoga Breathing Practice Workshop: “Healing the Heart”. Grief, from the Yogic perspective, is about healing and opening the Heart. Including the breathing practice of Yoga, called Pranayam, within a counseling session is ideal for encouraging emotional healing of the client and is also a wonderful self-care tool for the counselor, volunteer and family members. Exercises will be explored to be used with professionally and personally

Presenter: Jan Shulman, RMT, Kundalini Yoga Instructor

Session Two – (Thursday 1:30 – 3:00)

Session Two E - (Thursday 1:30 – 3:00) Workshop Title: How to Create A Memory Box, Grief Coloring Book and A Teen Grief Video The Bereavement Program at CMHA Windsor- Essex has developed 3 unique resources that they will share with participants: memory boxes for families dealing with perinatal loss; Lucky’s Journey, a colouring book for grieving children; and a teen grief video. Presenter: Colleen Campo - Bereavement Resource Program - Canadian Mental Health Association - Windsor- Essex County

Session Two F - (Thursday 1:30 – 3:00) Workshop Title: Viewing in the wake of loss: A collective case study of family members' experiences with viewing soon after sudden, unexpected loss

Investigator and Project Background

Bethany and Christina, Hospital Social Workers in Regional Trauma Centre, maintain that viewing is a valuable component of care following death and routinely offer this option to loved ones. They recognize that interventions have variable effects on people in different situations and emphasize the importance of suspending beliefs to be open to perspectives and experiences family members’ choose to share. Presenters: Bethany Sprowl, BA, BSW, RSW and Christina Harrington, MSW, RSW

Page 6

Session Two G - (Thursday 1:30 – 3:00) Workshop Title: Leaving A Legacy – Executor’s Companion Guide If you have been named an Executor or are considering who to name as an Executor, then this session is for you. Learn about the emotional, legal and financial considerations when creating your own legacy; as Mme Gagnon so eloquently said: "Eventually this will be my last loving gift for my daughters." Presenter: Kat Downey is a much sought after speaker and professional educator concerning the End of Life Issues that many of us would prefer to ignore. Step into your courage and learn more in this session.

Session Two H - (Thursday 1:30 – 3:00) Workshop Title: “My Life Through the Years”, A Story Telling Project. VON Chatham-Kent has developed a “legacy” project with trained volunteers to help palliative clients as well as lonely and isolated seniors tell their life stories. They will give an overview of their successful program and will review actual the Story Telling Binder/Tool that is available for purchase. Presenters: Jane Parr RN, Jan Reinhardus – VON Chatham Kent

Session Three – Friday October 16, 2009 (9:00 to 10:30)

Session Three I – (Friday 9:00 – 10:30) Workshop Title: A Study of Being – In the presence of absence There are strategies we know and some we have yet to learn – some we use and some we have forgotten – that help us be with people who are living with the absence of a loved one. The ideal is that we can be fully present, yet empty, so the bereaved may pour out their grief. This workshop will provide helpful strategies for being in the present to avoid the hooks and anchors that pull us out of the moment. Presenter: Richard Paul – Certified Death Educator

Page 7

Session Three J - (Friday 9:00 – 10:30) Workshop Title: Movies That Move Us This popular workshop demonstrates how you can incorporate film as teacher in your work with those who mourn. We will look at scenes from films such as Departures, Diving Bell and the Butterfly, Young at Heart and Griefwalker as well as the exploding recourses now available on Youtube. We will consider what makes a film or film scene a masterpiece for grief work and practical ways you can use can make your presentations, workshops and counselling work come alive with film. Popcorn and kleenex are provided! Presenter: William Cooke MSW, RSW, MDiv.

Session Three K - (Friday 9:00 – 10:30) Workshop Title: Creativity As an Expression of Bereavment Creativity plays an ‘essential’ role in Bereaving. Art therapies and expressions of bereavement are vital factors in processing grief. Some of us need that extra expression of what we are feeling in order to process the loss and bring deep meaning to our loss. We will take a look at several avenues of expressing what is felt with various Art approaches during grief and sorrow. Presenter: Rev. Dr. Sharon Willson DCC GPP

MANDALA BOOK SHOP CENTENNIAL CENTRE – RM.15 LOUNGE DURING THE ENTIRE CONFERENCE

Page 8

Session Three L - (Friday 9:00 – 10:30)

Workshop Title: WALKING WITH FORGIVENESS – ASSISTING YOUR CLIENT WITH ANGER, GUILT AND SHAME

“To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.” As caregivers working with hospice palliative care and bereavement clients and family members we often encounter individuals that need to be forgiven or give forgiveness to others This workshop will present current thinking and practices on how to receive and give forgiveness and will examine the The Four Guidepost Model as a tool to work with clients. Participants will leave with practical tools that will help identify shame and guilt, eliminate anger and facilitate forgiveness. Presenter: Eugene Dufour – Hospice Palliative Care and Bereavement Consultant

Session Three M - (Friday 9:00 to 10:30) Workshop Title: Creating a 3D Memory With the death of a parent children are deprived of knowing the parent as the relationship would have evolved. Where do I come from? Why do I do that? Those are questions we ask as we grow and become adults. Children grieve again with each new phase of their lives. Creating a 3D image to remember is creating a real person for the child of parent loss. A real person for the child to know. With the death of a parent children are deprived of knowing the parent as the relationship would have evolved. The 3D memory creates a real person...the memories compiled from birth to death will create the person the child will want to know in coming years. Presenter: Barb Thorogood – Bereavement Resource Council of Elgin

WALK THE LABYRINTH ROOM 16

During the entire conference

Mandala Book Shop

Centennial Centre – Rm.15 Lounge

Page 9 BON - 2010 Conference Schedule

October 20th – 22nd Wednesday, October 20th 8:30 am – 9:00 Registration 9:00 am – 4:00 pm Pre-Conference Workshops Wednesday, October 20th 4:00 pm – 5:30 pm Registration - CENTENNIAL CENTRE

5:30 pm – 6:30 pm Welcome – Bev Wilson - Dinner – DINING ROOM

6:30 pm – 7:00 pm Celebration of Remembering, Hope and Healing - AUDITORIUM

7:00 pm – 8:30 pm Plenary – Dr. Darcy Harris - AUDITORIUM

Thursday October 21st 7:00 am – 8:30 am Breakfast

8:00 am – 8:45 am Registration – CENTENNIAL CENTRE

8:45 am – 9:00 am Welcome – Bev Wilson and Janet Devine

9:00 am – 10:30 am Plenary – Dr. Bill Webster - AUDITORIUM

10:30 am – 11:00 am Break

11:00 am – 12:30 pm Session One Workshop

12:30 pm – 1:30 pm Lunch

1:30 pm – 3:00 pm Session Two Workshop

3:00 pm – 3:30 pm Break

3:30 pm – 5:00 pm Plenary – Kelly Walker - AUDITORIUM

5:00 pm – 6:30 pm Free Time - Guided Nature Walk - Yoga

6:30 pm – 8:00 pm Dinner – BON Annual General Meeting – Dining Room

8:00 pm – 11:00 pm Social - COURT LOUNGE Silent Auction, Networking, Music, BON fire – cash bar Friday October 22nd 7:00 am – 8:30 am Breakfast

7:30 am – 8:30 am Yoga

8:00 am – 9:00 am Check Out

9:00 am – 10:30 am Session Three - Workshop

10:30 am – 11:00 am Break

11:00 am – 12:30 pm Plenary – Cate Gibson – AUDITORIUM

12:30 pm – 2:00 pm Lunch and Wrap-Up – DINING ROOM

Walk the Labyrinth Room 16

Page 10

Conference Registration Form

Bereavement Ontario Network 20th Annual Conference October 19, & 20 – 22, 2010, Geneva Park YMCA Conference Centre, Orillia, Ontario

Name:_______________________________________ Work Phone:_______________________________ Organization:_________________________________ Home Phone:_______________________________ Street Address:________________________________ Fax:______________________________________ City:_______________________ Postal Code:______ E-mail:____________________________________ Are you currently a member of Bereavement Ontario Network? � Yes � No IF YES, I am an organization / business member under the name:____________________________________ IF NO, I would like to apply for a 2010 BON membership (valid Jan. 1 to Dec. 31, 2010) � Yes � No Conference Fees BON MEMBERS BEFORE

SEPT. 20TH AFTER SEPT. 20TH

Full day Pre-Conference with buffet lunch (add a full breakfast for $15)

$110 $125

Main Conference with 6 buffet meals, Wed + Thurs night accommodations

$595 $655

Pre- Conference + Main Conference $625!!! $695Non-Members Pre-Conference $140 $155Main Conference $695 $755Pre- Conference + Main Conference $725 $795 � If you would like a room with someone in particular, please state name:______________________________ Pre-Conference Workshop Fee………..…………….……...….$___________ Pre-Conference - Wednesday Breakfast (add $15.00)….……..$___________ Conference Registration Fee ……………………….….….........$___________ Pre-Conference + Main Conference…………………….……...$___________ Single Accommodation (add $45.00 per night)…………...…....$___________ 2010 Membership (complete form on next page)………..….....$___________ . Total Fee Enclosed:…………………………….………..…...….$___________

Payment by: □ Cheque □Visa □ MasterCard Credit Card Number __________________________ Expiry Date (month/year) __________ Security Code:____ Name on Card _________________________________________ Signature ____________________________

Page 11 Workshop Choices

Please indicate workshop choices by number and speaker. Some workshops have limited space… Register early to avoid disappointment and list an alternate. Workshops are filled on a first-come-first-serve basis.

Choice Workshop Number and Speaker Session One – Thursday, October 21, 2010 11:00 am to 12:30 pm First Choice Second Choice Session Two – Thursday, October 21, 2010 1:30pm to 3:00 pm First Choice Second Choice Session Three – Friday, October 22, 2010 9:00 am to 10:30 am First Choice Second Choice □ Please list any special needs you may have: ____________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________________________________ Would you consider offering your vehicle to car pool from your community? □Yes □ No This is my first time attending a Bereavement Ontario Network Conference. □Yes □ No I agree to have my name and email address included on a participant list which will be distributed to all attendees in their conference package. □Yes □ No Date ________________________________ Signature ___________________________________________ Cancellation Policy: Cancellations accepted until October 10, 2010; a 25% cancellation fee will apply. Make your cheque payable to Bereavement Ontario Network Please complete both pages of this registration form. Last date for registration is October 6th , 2010. Return this registration form with your payment (no post-dated cheques please) to: ■ Bereavement Ontario Network, P.O. Box 2844, St. Marys, Ontario, N4X 1A5 ■ Fax (519) 284-0863 * Accommodation available on Tuesday night (incl. supper Tuesday and breakfast Wednesday) – contact BON . ** All costs are based on double occupancy. Single accommodation: please add $45 per night.

If you are interested in attending only part of the conference, contact BON

Page 12

Conference Details: Early Bird Pricing • Save by registering early - registration form and payment must be received September 20, 2010. Member Discount Rates • Member Discount Rates - significant savings for BON members. Workshop Choices • Review workshops and indicate choices on the Registration Form. Register early - workshops will be assigned on a first-come-first-serve basis. Deadline for Registration • Postmarked by September 20, 2010 - Early Bird Rates • Last Registration Date is October 6, 2010. Cancellation Policy • Cancellation Fee is $100.00 on or before October 6, 2010. • Final date for cancellation is October 6, 2010 (no refunds after this date). Education Units • A Certificate will be included in your conference package for CEU purposes. Ontario College of Nurses • A nurse who identifies bereavement as a learning need can attend the Bereavement Ontario Network (BON) Conference and use the conference as part of his/her annual reflective practice for his/her quality assurance program required by the College of Nurses of Ontario.

Dr. Jack Morgan Student Scholarship The Bereavement Ontario Network is pleased to offer

The John D. Morgan Memorial Student Conference Scholarship named in memory of Dr. Morgan who died in the spring of 2005.

Dr. Morgan touched the lives of many of his colleagues and students; he gave generously to the Bereavement Ontario Network along with his many pursuits in death education.

We are pleased to honour Dr. Morgan's memory with a student scholarship to our upcoming conference. The successful candidate will receive full registration including accommodation for

the conference and a one year membership to the Bereavement Ontario Network. Anyone who is enrolled in a course or program in grief and bereavement or a related field (fulltime

or part-time) is eligible for this award.

To apply, submit copies of the following by email as an attachment in Microsoft Word to: info@bereavementontarionetwork.ca Applications must be received on or before September10, 2010. Contents of application must include: 1/ Cover Letter

- Name, address, telephone number and email address - - student status - full/part-time, graduate/undergraduate - Name of post-secondary institution including brief description of program and/or course - Letter of recommendation from a professor familiar with your interest/work in grief and bereavement

2/ Essay - a paper or project which has been submitted as part of your current course work (Sept., 2009 - June,

2010) in the field of grief and bereavement.

Page 13

Application for 2010 Membership (valid January 1, 2010 to December 31, 2010)

___ $65 Individuals/professionals/small organizations (fewer than 7 paid employees) ___ $125 Large organizations (more than 7 paid employees) ___ $30 Students Name (individual or business) ____________________________________________ Occupation (individuals only) ____________________________________________ Contact Name(s) & Position (limit of 2 for small business; 5 for large organizations) 1. ___________________________________________ 2. __________________________________________ 3. ___________________________________________ 4. __________________________________________ 5. ___________________________________________ Directory Information (i.e. description of services as you would like them listed) __________________________________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________________________________ I wish to have my information published in the Bereavement Ontario Network Directory. □Yes □ No I wish to be informed of grief related activities and educational opportunities by email. □Yes □ No

Bereavement Ontario Network, P.O. Box 2844, St. Marys, Ontario, N4X 1A5 ■ Phone: 519-284-2230 ■ Fax: 519-284-0863 ■ E-mail: info@bereavementontarionetwork.ca

October 20 – 22, 2010, Geneva Park YMCA Conference Centre, Orillia, Ontario

Bereavement Ontario Network (BON) is a diverse group of organizations and individuals throughout the province that work in the field of grief, bereavement, and mourning as professionals and volunteers.

The need for a network was first discussed in 1989 at a bereavement conference in Hamilton. The ideas, enthusiasm and energy generated during that conference led to a meeting a year later at which a blueprint for the Bereavement Ontario Network was developed. It does no grief counselling or provides any direct service. Instead, it fills a distinct void by providing linkages between the various groups, counsellors and bereavement resources already in place.

Today, the Bereavement Ontario Network provides an opportunity to access, in a reciprocal manner, the knowledge, experience, wisdom and sensitivity of other members throughout the province. You can use BON to access this support for your clients, and yourself from across the province.

Membership in the Bereavement Ontario Network is open to individuals, volunteer organizations, small businesses, and corporations. If your work brings you in contact with the bereaved, BON can help you help them.

We invite you to become part of the Bereavement Ontario Network. Tell us how you can help us to help you and others involved in bereavement and death work.

Page 14 Directions to YMCA Geneva Park

From Barrie / Toronto Take Highway 400 north to Barrie then take Highway 11north to Orillia. At Orillia take second exit, Highway12 South to Rama Road (Simcoe County Road 44). Turn left. Geneva Park is 10 km from corner, on left hand side. From Peterborough/Lindsay Take Highway 7 west to Highway 12 to Atherley. Turn right onto Rama Road (Simcoe County Road 44). Geneva Park is 10 km from corner on left side. From Points North Take Highway 11 south to Highway 169 / Washago exit. Follow Highway 169 one km to Rama Road (Simcoe County Road 44). Turn right and follow Rama Road for 10 km. Turn right into Geneva Park. From Georgian Bay Take Highway 26 east through Stayner. Turn left onto County Road 22 (Horseshoe Valley Road). Continue on 22 to Highway 12 (Price’s Corners). Turn right onto Highway 12. Bypass Orillia by taking Highway 11 South for 3 km exiting onto Highway 12 south. Take Highway 12 south to Rama Road (Simcoe County Road 44). Turn left. Geneva Park is 10 km from corner, on left hand side.

Travel Tip Follow the signs to Casino Rama. Heading north, Geneva Park YMCA is approximately 5km from Casino Rama on your left (stay on Rama Road). You pass Fern Resort on the left and Casino Rama on the right.

For additional assistance, consult an Ontario Road Map or call YMCA Geneva Park at (705) 325-2253