TAKE AND TEACH LESSON

Change: Loss, Opportunity and Resilience

PURPOSE This lesson includes activities to supplement the

online course, "Change: Loss, Opportunity and

Resilience." Job Club personnel and other

facilitators should use this lesson to help

participants understand how people respond to

change and why a proactive approach is better

than a reactive one.

OBJECTIVES By the end of this lesson, participants will:

• Know more about people’s general responses to change and why it's important to move

beyond viewing change only as a loss to seeing it as an opportunity.

• Understand how they usually respond to change themselves (reactively or proactively) and

why it’s important to strive for a more proactive response.

• Become familiar with the Stages of the Grief Cycle and how they have experienced these

stages when faced with unexpected, negative change in their own lives.

• Identify some ways (strategies), as well as related goals and actions, to build their capacity

for resilience.

LENGTH Allow an hour; provide this lesson after participants complete the online course.

IMPORTANT NOTES Before the online course, ask participants to remember their score from the “How Do You View

Change” questionnaire so they can fully participate in this lesson.

Before starting the lesson, fill out a sample “My Ways to Build Resilience” worksheet in order to

help participants complete theirs.

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HANDOUTS Handouts accompany this lesson. For each participant, make one copy of the following:

• “How Change Affects People” report

• “How Do You View Change?” questionnaire – with “Interpreting Your Score” information on

reverse side

• "Stages of the Grief Cycle" worksheet – with comments from others on reverse side

• “Ten Ways to Build Resilience” factsheet – Print Slide 4 from the American Psychological

Association website: http://www.apa.org/helpcenter/road-resilience.aspx.

• “My Ways to Build Resilience” worksheet – Remember to complete a sample worksheet

before the lesson in order to guide participants through this exercise.

MATERIALS • Pens or pencils – Give one to each participant who didn’t bring their own.

• Note card or paper slip – Give one to each participant.

GUIDE FOR FACILITATORS Welcome and Introduction

• Welcome participants and ask them to introduce themselves. Also ask them to briefly

share a concern or question they have about an unexpected, negative change they have, or

are, experiencing. From their responses, you will get a sense of the problems they face and

how you might customize your remarks to address their needs.

• Next, introduce the lesson by saying something like the following:

Bad things happen to us. There’s no point denying it. But we all have to figure out how to

deal with the storms of life, and staying angry or depressed won’t help. We don't want to

get stuck seeing change as a loss forever. Eventually, we want to take advantage of the

opportunities that change offers, even when we didn’t ask for that change. This course is

designed to give you information to help you bounce back from the difficulty you’re

experiencing now.

Every time you recover effectively from an unexpected, negative change you are building

resiliency. You can’t stop all bad things from happening to you, but with good planning

you can prevent some. And you can increase your capacity for resilience to weather the

next “storm” you face.

We'll talk soon about resources that will help you become more resilient. Right now, let’s

learn more about how people in general, and you personally, respond to change –

especially negative change.

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Start Lesson

• Begin the formal lesson by saying something like the following:

As you learned in the online course, some people believe we resist change. But what we

really resist is being changed. We want to have some say in the changes we go through, but

sometimes we have little or no control over changes that affect us.

However, we can control our response to change. As I said, we don't want to get stuck

seeing change as a loss forever. Eventually, we want to see the opportunities offered by

change and take advantage of them.

To get started, let’s look at the scores you received in the “How Do You View Change”

questionnaire you completed during the online course.

Review Questionnaire Scores

• Pass out pens or pencils, note cards or paper slips, and copies of the “How Do You View

Change?” questionnaire – including the “Interpreting Your Score” information on the

reverse side. Explain that this is a paper copy of the same questionnaire participants took

in the online course. Tell them they can take this document home and complete the

questionnaire again if they wish – perhaps after trying some techniques for building

resiliency.

• Now, ask participants to write their score from the (online) questionnaire on the note card

or paper slip – without their name – and hand it in to you. Record the scores on a chart or

blackboard according to where they fall on the scale between reactive (higher scores) and

proactive (lower scores). Call participants’ attention to the range of scores, noting that this

demonstrates individuals’ varying responses to change.

• Review the “Interpreting Your Score” information with participants and ask them to

describe their reactions without disclosing their scores. Were they surprised by their

scores? Did they learn some things in the course that will help them change their scores if

they want to?

• Carefully review the "Resources for Building Resilience – and More" section on the

“Interpreting Your Score” page – noting where participants can get more information on

dealing with change.

Stages of the Grief Cycle

• Pass out copies of the "How Change Affects People" report. Explain that they don’t have to

read the entire paper in class, but recommend reading it carefully at home and saving it as

a reminder of what they learned in the online course. For now, ask participants to look at

the illustration of the Stages of the Grief Cycle on page 3 of the report.

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• Next, pass out copies of the "Stages of the Grief Cycle" worksheet and ask participants to

complete it with a recent unexpected, negative change in mind. Answer any questions they

have. When participants are done filling out the worksheet, ask if anyone is willing to

discuss anything they wrote. If no one wants to share, simply ask participants, "What

observations or lessons come to mind from completing the worksheet?"

• Remind participants to review comments from others who have gone through the stages of

grief; these comments are on the back of the worksheet. Help participants understand that

they are not alone in having certain feelings following an unexpected, negative change.

Everyone goes through these stages of grief.

Ways to Build Resilience

• Transition to the final part of the lesson by passing out the “Ten Ways to Build Resilience”

factsheet and the “My Ways to Build Resilience” worksheet to each participant. Say

something like this:

Now let’s think about what you can do on your own to become more proactive in

responding to change – or saying it another way, to become more resilient.

You can learn more about building resilience, and the five characteristics of resilience, by

enrolling in the “Staying Resilient in Times of Change” online course. But if you’re not

taking that course, or you’re waiting to take that course, you can do some things right now

to increase your resilience.

Let’s look at the “Ten Ways to Build Resilience” factsheet. Please take this home and read it

closely, but for now, let’s scan the list of ways – also called strategies – to build resilience. [Read and briefly describe each point to participants.]

Choose one of the strategies, or ways, that you’d like to work on and start filling out the

"My Ways to Build Resilience" worksheet. List the strategy in the space provided and then

some goals related to that strategy. Let’s go through an example to see how it’s done. [Review your sample worksheet with the group.]

Some of your goals might fall under more than one of the 10 ways to build resilience. For

example, you may want to exercise regularly, which falls under “Take care of yourself.” In

that case, you will probably want to create a separate worksheet for “Take care of yourself”

and list your goal to exercise regularly on that sheet.

You may not need to write all these things down. Maybe you can keep your strategies,

goals, and actions in your head. That’s fine – as long as you make progress in building your

resilience. Remember, though, that writing things down helps you remember and hold

yourself accountable – so we recommend it.

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• Give participants a few minutes to start filling in the "My Ways to Build Resilience"

worksheet. When time is up, ask if any participants want to share the strategies they chose

or some of their thoughts about doing the exercise. Close by asking participants to finish

the worksheet at home and encourage them to create other worksheets to implement other

strategies on the "Ten Ways to Build Resilience" factsheet.

WRAPUP

Thank participants for taking the course and conclude with something like the following:

Dealing with change isn't easy, but some ways are better than others. The more you learn about

change and how you personally cope with change, the better choices you can make in the future.

People who thrive in times of change are those who see the opportunities change presents and are

open to new ways of doing things.

QUESTIONS OR COMMENTS? Send a message to Sharon Danes, sdanes@umn.edu

© 2013, Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. For more information on the Change: Loss, Opportunity and Resilience online course, visit http://www1.extension.umn.edu/family/tough-times/dealing-with-stress/change-loss-opportunity-resilience/online-course/ University of Minnesota Extension is an equal opportunity educator and employer. In accordance with the Americans with Disabilities Act, this material is available in alternative formats upon request. Direct requests to 612-626-6602.

How Do You View Change? A Resilience Questionnaire Think how you usually view change. Next, read each statement and circle the number to the right that indicates how true the statement usually is for you. Note that the number order varies from left to right, but the starting number always represents what is most often (or always) true for you, and the ending number represents what is rarely (or never true) for you. After reading all the statements, total the answers you circled. Check the back of the sheet to evaluate your score.

REMEMBER –From left to right: 1st number = Very true for me; 2nd number = Somewhat true for me; 3rd number =Neutral (sometimes true, sometimes false); 4th number = Somewhat untrue for me; 5th number = Very untrue for me.

1. Change is threatening. 5 4 3 2 1

2. Change is a normal and natural part of life. 1 2 3 4 5

3. Change offers opportunities and challenges. 1 2 3 4 5

4. I have an overarching purpose in my life. 1 2 3 4 5

5. Although I strive for perfection, I accept that it is impossible. 1 2 3 4 5

6. Change makes me feel insecure and uncertain. 5 4 3 2 1

7. Whenever I am faced with change, I try to anticipate the sources of resistance to that change.

1 2 3 4 5

8. I have no problem tapping into the special skills of those around me.

1 2 3 4 5

9. Many changes are the result of personal vendettas or conspiracies.

5 4 3 2 1

10. Life is supposed to be filled with choices that produce ever more demanding challenges.

1 2 3 4 5

11. The cliché, “All comes to he who waits,” describes my philosophy about life.

5 4 3 2 1

12. Life is unpredictable, confusing, and contradictory. 5 4 3 2 1

13. The discomfort of change is just part of the adjustment process.

1 2 3 4 5

14. When I feel angry and frustrated, I take it out on others. 5 4 3 2 1

15. My problem-solving mode is triggered by disruption. 1 2 3 4 5

16. Bureaucracies cannot really be changed. 5 4 3 2 1

17. Change initiatives will always be mismanaged. 5 4 3 2 1

18. Any attempt at change merely triggers organizational inefficiency and ineffectiveness.

5 4 3 2 1

Total Score ____________

__________________________________________________________________________________________

Questionnaire adapted with permission by Sharon M. Danes, Extension Family Economist and Professor, Family Social Science, University of Minnesota – from Conner, D. R. (1992).Managing at the speed of change. New York: Villard Books.

© 2013, Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. For more information on the Change: Loss, Opportunity and Resilience online course, visit http://www1.extension.umn.edu/family/tough-times/dealing-with-stress/change-loss-opportunity-resilience/online-course/ University of Minnesota Extension is an equal opportunity educator and employer. In accordance with the Americans with Disabilities Act, this material is available in alternative formats upon request. Direct requests to 612-626-6602.

Interpreting Your Score The lower your score on the “How Do You View Change?” resilience questionnaire, the more you view change proactively – as an opportunity. The higher your score, the more you view change reactively – as a loss. The more you view change proactively, the more resilient you are.

What Your Score Means People with higher scores (reactive) focus mainly on the dangers that change presents and thus see change primarily as a loss. They expend precious time and energy on feeling threatened by the unexpected instead of taking action to deal with change. On the other hand, people with lower scores (proactive), demonstrate resilience by viewing change as an opportunity for growth. Lower: If your score was on the lower end, you view change proactively most, or all, of the time. You already have a strong capacity for resilience so hang on to it, and look for ways to increase it even more. See “Resources for Building Resilience – and More” below for more information. Middle: If your score was in the middle, your view of change varies somewhat with circumstances—proactive some times and reactive at other times. Your capacity for resilience is OK, but you could do better. Think about changes you faced in the past and how you behaved. When were you proactive? When were you reactive? Now think about the future. How can you take an even more proactive view of change? See “Resources for Building Resilience – and More” below for more information. Higher: If your score was on the higher end, you tend to view change reactively, and you have a strong need to increase your capacity for resilience. How do you do that? See “Resources for Building Resilience – and More” below for more information.

Resources for Building Resilience – and More You can increase your capacity for resilience by developing five characteristics: Positive, Focused, Flexible, Organized, and Proactive. You were introduced to those characteristics in this online course; to learn more about developing those characteristics, enroll in another of our online courses, “Staying Resilient in Times of Change.” You can also find more tools for dealing with stress, getting through tough times, and building resilience on websites and in books at your local library. One book we recommend is Managing at the Speed of Change by Daryl R. Conner. In addition, check out the following websites:

• Families in Tough Times: Dealing with Stress – University of Minnesota Extension http://www1.extension.umn.edu/family/tough-times/dealing-with-stress/

• The Road to Resilience – American Psychological Association http://www.apa.org/helpcenter/road-resilience.aspx#

• The role of resilience in mental and emotional health – HelpGuide.org http://www.helpguide.org/mental/mental_emotional_health.htm#role

Questionnaire adapted with permission by Sharon M. Danes, Extension Family Economist and Professor, Family Social Science, University of Minnesota – from Conner, D. R. (1992). Managing at the speed of change. New York: Villard Books.

18 90 Proactive Reactive

Stages of the Grief Cycle 1. Identify and briefly describe a major unexpected, negative change you have

experienced in your personal or professional life.

2. Reflect on your change as it relates to the grief cycle. Briefly describe your feelings and actions in each stage of the cycle.

Shock and Denial Anger Depression and Detachment Dialogue and Bargaining Acceptance

3. Lessons: After reflecting on the major change you experienced and how you went through the stages of grief, what lessons come to mind?

Developed by Sharon M. Danes, Extension Family Economist and Professor, Family Social Science, University of Minnesota. © 2013, Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. For more information on the Change: Loss, Opportunity and Resilience online course, visit http://www1.extension.umn.edu/family/tough-times/dealing-with-stress/change-loss-opportunity-resilience/online-course/ University of Minnesota Extension is an equal opportunity educator and employer. In accordance with the Americans with Disabilities Act, this material is available in alternative formats upon request. Direct requests to 612-626-6602.

Others' Comments

Here are a few comments other people have made about the stages of grief.

Share these with the group to stimulate discussion or simply help them

understand that they are not alone in having certain feelings after experiencing

an unexpected, negative change. NOTE: Comments are paraphrased; they are

not exact quotes but stated in the first person to aid in understanding.

• It was good to know that what I experienced was normal. Sometimes I

thought I was going crazy.

• Now I understand what others in my family and friends go through when

they experience a loss. I can empathize with them more.

• It's interesting that people can flip back and forth among the different

cycles. Now I won't feel so bad if I slip back to the anger stage after I

thought I'd moved on.

• I was surprised at how strong the shock and denial stage can be. Even

after my best friend in another state died while I was with her in the

hospital, I was still denying she was gone when I came home.

• It was very hard to concentrate after I experienced a loss. Now I

understand that this was part of the depression and detachment stage; it

was natural to have the blahs.

• Now I'll be more patient when people want to talk to me about someone

they have lost. I know they're going through the dialogue and bargaining

stage of the grief cycle and need someone to talk to. I also know that

they'll need to tell stories about their loved ones more than once.

© 2013, Regents of the University of Minnesota. All rights reserved. For more information on the Change: Loss, Opportunity and Resilience online course, visit http://www1.extension.umn.edu/family/tough-times/dealing-with-stress/change-loss-opportunity-resilience/online-course/ University of Minnesota Extension is an equal opportunity educator and employer. In accordance with the Americans with Disabilities Act, this material is available in alternative formats upon request. Direct requests to 612-626-6602.

My Ways to Build Resilience Strategy: _____________________________________________________

Goal 1: _______________________________________________________

Actions to accomplish goal Timeline/ due date

Resources required to accomplish goal

Goal 2: _______________________________________________________

Actions to accomplish goal Timeline/ due date

Resources required to accomplish goal

Strategy: _____________________________________________________

Goal 1: _______________________________________________________

Actions to accomplish goal Timeline/ due date

Resources required to accomplish goal

Goal 2: _______________________________________________________

Actions to accomplish goal Timeline/ due date

Resources required to accomplish goal