The WIFS Book Summary Club tele-class offered by WIFS is a resource for members to review the latest business and personal development books.

For 2007, the Book Summary is facilitated by Denise Davis and this summary is provided by Denise for those who are unable to attend the tele-class.

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Feel The Fear and Do It AnywayAuthor: Susan Jeffers

Book Summary by Denise Davis, WIFS Book Club Facilitator

Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway is designed to help people grab hold of their fears and live their life the way they want to live it – moving them from a place of pain, paralysis and depression to one of power, energy, and enthusiasm. Our inability to deal with fear (educational or psychological) We learned that we can reeducate our mind. We can accept fear simply as a fact of life rather than a barrier to success. We can unlearn the thinking that keeps us a prisoner in our own insecurities. Discovering our fears and the three levels of fear 1) Level One Fears: Fear that permeates many areas of our life (Those that “Happen” – aging, becoming disabled, war, etc. and those that “Require Action” – changing careers, loosing weight, using the telephone, etc.) 2) Level Two Fears: These fears have to do with our “inner state of mind” rather than our exterior situations – rejection, success, failure… 3) Level Three Fears: I can’t handle it! (At the bottom of every one of our fears is simply the fear that we can’t handle whatever life may bring us). Does Fear ever go away (five truths about fear) Truth #1 - The fear will never go away as long as you continue to grow. Truth #2 - The only way to get rid of the fear of doing something is to go out and do it. Truth #3 - The only way to feel better about yourself is to go out…and do it! Make deposits into our self-confidence bank. Truth #4 – Not only am I going to experience fear whenever I’m on unfamiliar territory, but so is everyone else. Truth #5 – Pushing through the fear is less frightening than living with the underlying fear that come from a feeling of helplessness. Moving from pain to power (our vocabulary) We learned to start eliminating from our vocabulary words that imply PAIN (I can’t, I should, It’s a problem) and start replacing them with words that give us POWER and choices (I won’t, I could, It’s an opportunity).

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Taking responsibility We don’t blame others for anything we are being, doing, having, or feeling We do not beat up on ourselves We are aware of when we are not taking responsibility so we can change We are handling the “chatterbox” in our head We are aware of the payoff that is keeping us stuck We are setting goals and working towards them We understand that we have choices in any given situation

“Fear (whatever yours happens to be) is holding you back from experiencing life the way you want to”.

We create our own reality: when we learn to handle our fear, we move from a position of pain to one of power! Myth: negative talk = reality and positive talk = unrealistic – Not true. About 90% of what we worry about ever happens. That means our negative worries only have a bout a 10% chance of being correct! A positive outlook can create a very “realistic” life of joy and satisfaction. Our mind reacts to what we feed it. Stop feeding yourself negative thoughts. Question: how do you feel when you are around negative, depressed, complaining people? Positive thinking toolbox – tape or CD player, inspirational tapes or CD’s, inspirational books (your own so you can highlight and mark in them), index cards, positive quotes, statements of affirmation (pg. 80 for examples ) If we will commit to a positive thinking program and routine it will change our lives. Our energy will increase. Our fears will begin to diminish, we will feel better physically, and we will silence the negative chatterbox in our head. We will begin to draw more positive people into our lives. We will begin to gain the power we need to handle whatever life throws at us. When “They” don’t want you to grow…when significant people in your life don’t want you to change or grow – how do we handle that?

• Awareness…are you a member of the moan-and-groan club or crowd? As you become more positive, you will be more aware of the kind of people you are around and whether they exude a negative or positive behavior and speech; you will automatically draw and be drawn to more positive people.

• Seek out strong, motivating, inspiring, supportive people: mentors, friends who are farther along in the journey than you, a good coach, nutritious co-workers, friends, and clients.

• Strive for healthy assertiveness. We lean towards aggressive behavior when we are hanging on to our new behavior for dear life. That’s when we will tend to lash out at those who don’t support us or when our statements become obnoxious and hurtful. We will lean towards passive behavior when we are not quite sure of ourselves and feel the need to defend our behavior.

• Acknowledge others when they are supporting you. Learn to respond to your significant others in a way that is positive and uplifting. Let them know how much you appreciate them, their support, and their willingness to help you grow.

• Be your own best friend. Do not put yourself down. Your new strength will help you break unhealthy ties and establish new, healthier ones.

How to make a no-lose decision – Two models on pgs. 112-115 It is our choice to live in a “no-lose” world. It’s the way we think about outcomes and opportunities. When we handle our fears in a way that allows us to reach our goals our self-esteem is considerably raised. We learn to trust that we will survive, no matter what happens.

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How whole is your “Whole Life”? – Example on page 138-139 Create what you want in each area of your life – set goals & action steps, read it daily, share your grid with someone you trust, find an accountability partner. Keep asking yourself, “How whole is my life?” Continue to create richness for yourself that nothing can ever take away your basic sense of completeness. It is then that you will realize how little you have to fear. Just nod your head and say “Yes!” Janet Zuckerman, “Say ‘yes’ to your universe”. Say yes to instead of “no” to the things life brings us that is beyond our control. Saying NO implies we are a victim. Saying YES is our hope. Acknowledge the pain – denying it can be deadly. Saying yes means getting up and acting on your belief that you can create meaning and purpose in whatever life hands you. Steps to saying YES…

• Create awareness that you have a choice in saying yes or no. • Nod your head and say yes – physically do this • Relax your body • Adopt an attitude of “Let’s see what good will come from this situation.” Look for the value

in the experience. • Be patient with yourself. It takes time to adopt a “yes” approach to life. • Go with the flow…like a river…we can not push the water up stream. Consciously accept

what is happening in your life. Choosing Love and Trust If all of your “giving” is about “getting,” think how fearful you will become. When we give from a place of love, rather than from a place of expectation, more usually comes back to us than we could ever have imagined.

• Give Away Thanks • Give Away Information • Give Away Praise • Give Away Time • Give Away Money • Give Away Love

Your life is abundant, and you count! You must become what you want to attract. Be the kind of person you would want to surround yourself with. Filling the Inner Void The author refers to this as our “Higher Self” (Inner Self, God-self). Our Subconscious Mind chooses its source of information and energy from either our Higher Self (a source of positive thoughts and positive energy) or our Chatterbox (source of negative thoughts and negative energy). It then sends this information to our Subconscious Mind. Our Subconscious Mind listens to the Conscious Mind and carries out the instructions given. (See diagram on pg. 193). If we do not consciously and consistently focus on the spiritual part of ourselves, we will never experience the kind of joy, satisfaction and connectedness we are all seeking. Page 210 list great examples of when we are tuned into our Chatterbox and when we are tuned into our Higher Self. There is Plenty of Time “One of the biggest pitfalls as you make your way through life is impatience”. Being impatient is a way of punishing yourself. When you are ready to move forward – you will. Until then, keep taking it in and keep learning. Remember that life is an ongoing process of learning so refuse to beat up on yourself for not having “made it” yet. Commit yourself to pushing through the fear and becoming more than you are at the present moment. Commit to learning how to bring whatever you do in life the loving and powerful energy of your Higher Self. Whatever it takes to get you there, Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway.