Starter Sentences - Literacy Shed Plus · Starter Sentences The moonlight ... Are your tenses correct? Does it need ... Is it varied enough? Have you used commas after fronted adverbials?

TheLiteracyShed© 2017

MarshmallowsResource1a

StarterSentences

Themoonlightreflectedontheripplesofthelake.Therewasafireintheforest.Therewerethicktreesbytheedgeofthewater.Inthedistance,thereweremountains.Aroundthefire,therewerestones.Therewereinsectschirpinginthewoods.Nexttothefire,therewasalog.Therewasroughbarkonthetreetrunks.Thegrasswasshort.Therewasasmalltentnearthefire.Infrontofthetent,therewasasleepingbagandpillow.

SentenceStretchingHowcanweextendoursentences?• Saywherethingsare• Useadjectivesbeforeanoun• Useadjectivesafteranoun• Addinextradetail(youmightneedtousea

conjunction)• Useasimile

TheLiteracyShed© 2017MarshmallowsResource2a

TheLiteracyShed© 2017

Itwasaclear,warmnight.Cricketschirpedinthedistance,

andintermittentlyanowlhooted.Asolitaryboatbobbed

onthelakeandfromtime-to-timethewaterslapped

againstit.Moonlighthittheripplesonthelake,reflecting

littlesparksoflightlikediamondsonthewater.Faroffin

thedistance,behindthelake,greatmountainsloomed.

Theylookedlikegiantpurplesleepingbeasts.Talltrees

withthicktrunksedgedthewaterandbirdsroostedin

theirtangledbranches.Ashortleaf-litteredpathwayledto

acampingarea.Inthemiddleofthecamp,afirecrackled

withredembersandashrisingupwardsintothenightsky.

Bythefire,afallenlogwasusedasamakeshiftbench,and

totherearofthecampwasasmallcanvastent.

MarshmallowsResource2b

TheLiteracyShed(c)2017

Adjectives Verbs PrepositionPhrases

clearwarm

chirpedhooted

Inthedistanceonthelake

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Nightwascreepingin.Thewateronthelakewasbarelymovingandtheskywasabrilliantblue-violetcolour.__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Vocabulary PhrasesReflectingRipplingLappingGlisteningToweringEntwinedSubstantialSilhouettesDarkShadowyEmbersCracklingCanvasTemporarySituated

beyondthetreelinebeneaththedarkeningskyNext tothefireTowardtheforestAcrossthewaterBytheedgeofthe…Intheshadowofthe…UndertheshadowybranchesWithinseveralfeetof…BythesideofthetentAlongthepathwayBythefiresideInviewofthe…

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Skin

Ears

Tail

Movements

Sounds

Likes/Dislikes

Body

TheCreature

Eyes

Mouth



Thedonriphant isalargelandmammal;adultmalesoftenweighupto3500kg.Itsthick,wrinkledskinhelpstotrapmoistureandkeepstheanimalcoolforlonger(somethingwhichisimportantintheAfricanheat).Typically,thedonriphant walksinanuprightstanceandusesthelargepadsonthesolesofitsfeetforstability,thoughitcanrunforshortburstsonfourlegs.Ithasashortgreen-tippedtail,whichiscoveredincoarse,wiryhairs,andisusedforbalance.Twoarm-likelimbshelpittoclimbtrees,anditshandsarecapableofgrippingandutilisingtools.Itslongneckisusefulwhengatheringvegetation,andstrong,flexiblemusclesallowthecreaturetoextenditsneckbyafurther8-10inches,whenneeded.Thedonriphant hastwolongearswhichprimarilyfunctionascoolingdevices.Astemperaturesclimb,thedonriphant rotatesitsearsinacircularmotiontocooltheheadandtrunk.Thedonriphant hasacutehearing.Manyanimalshavefairlylimitedvisionandsodonriphants relyupontheirkeensenseofhearingtoprotectthemselvesfrompredators.Althoughthetrunkfunctionsmainlyforbreathing,itisalsousedforgrasping,feeding,smelling,drinking,makingsoundsandforprotection.Itgrowsaninchforeveryyearofthecreature’slifeuntiltheyreachmaturity.



Thedonriphant isfoundonlyinAfrica,thoughfossilsofamammalsimilartothedonriphant havebeenfoundinSouthAmerica.Mainlyfoundlivinginherds,thedonriphant iswelladaptedtoliveinahot,dryclimateand,likeacamel,itcanstorefattokeepitnourishedonlongjourneys.Theanimal’sbodyisdesignedtoreachtheleavesandbranchesfromthetopoftrees.Typically,anadultmalewilleataround30-35kgofleavesaday.Leavesprovidethedonriphant withsomeofitswaterandtherestisconsumedatthewateringholes,ofteninlargegroups.

Duetoitslargesize,thedonriphant hasveryfewpredators.Hyenaswilloftenworkinpackstoseparateyoung,orweak,animalsfromtherestoftheherd.Insomecircumstances,lionswilltargetalonedonriphant,thoughareunlikelytopursueaherd.Adultdeathsaremorelikelytobecausedbycrocodiles,whichstrikeintheriversandwateringholes.



Openers

The _________________isfound…Someanimals…Typicallythe______________...Afurtherimportantfeature,isthe…Duetoits_____________,the_____________...Insomecircumstances,…Today,there are…Onaverage,…Anadult_____________is…Althoughtheyappearto….Anotherobvioustraitis…Theirdietconsistsmainlyof…Itiswidelybelievedthat…__________usetheirsenseof___________to,…Ingeneral,…Unsurprisingly,…Onthewhole,…Aspredators,the________________,Lifeexpectationis…Theirhabitatisusually…



habitat physical appearance diet

omnivore herbivore carnivorous nocturnal

prey predator species endangered

inhabits exhibits vertebrate invertebrate

colouration prominent marine aquatic

acute ambush scavenger territory

forage hunt population diverse

environment feature function limbs

migration juvenile adult communicate



IntroductionWriteashortintroductiontoyourcreature.Thisonlyneedstobealineortwo.Explainbrieflywhatitisandgiveafactortwoaboutit.E.g.Thedonriphant isalargemammalandamemberoftheelephantfamily.ItisnativetoAfricaandlivesinlargeherds.

Main paragraphsWritetwo(ormoreifyouhavetime)paragraphsaboutyourcreature.Keepyourparagraphsbasedaroundatheme.Thingstothinkabout:• Thirdperson• Presenttense• Soundlikeanexpert• Varyyoursentenceopeners• Usetechnicalvocabulary• Sentencesshouldflow• Extendyoursentences• Remainformalformostofthepiece• Useheadingsandsub-headingstopresentyourinformation• Additionalinformationcouldbeaddedasbullet-pointsora‘did

youknow?’box• Attempttointerestthereader• Usenounsandpronounstoavoidrepetition(saythecreature,the

animals,theyetc.ratherthanrepeatingthename

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There are ripples on the water and the creatures eyes and ears appear.


StepNumber Foreground Background



Time Whathappens

SequenceOne

11s Firstseethe creatureappearbehindtheboy

16s Boyhearssomething ashe’stoastingmarshmallows

20s Theviewinganglealterssothattheaudience looksuptothecreature’sface- seehisteeth

22s Boystandsupandholds upthestickwiththemarshmallowonit

SequenceTwo

1m17s Creatureshowshisteeth, eyeschangeandhegrowls-viewinganglefromthefloormakesthecreatureseem

verylarge

1m22s Theboyattempts torunawaythroughthelongrustlinggrass

1m23s Theboyfalls

1m25s Theboylooksup andthecreatureisapproaching

1m28s Theboyspots thepillow

1m29s Thecreaturehashismouthopenwideasiftobite

1m33s Theboy hidesbehindthepillow



Witheyesglaringandteethsnarling,thecreaturerose

upwardstoastandingpositionbehindthechildsatby

thefire.Atwigsnapped.Withouthesitation,theyoung

boy-scoutwhippedhisheadaroundandleaptfromhis

seat,legsshaking.Themarshmallowhehadbeen

toastingsatpoisedontheendofastickandhethrustit

towardsthecreature.

Canyoufind….

Anynoun-verbpairs

Ashortsnappysentence

Aprepositionalphraseoftime

Aprepositionalphraseofplace

Verbswhichimplyspeed



Itwasawarmnight.Anowlhootedandcricketschirped.A

solitaryboatbobbedonthelakeandfromtime-to-timethe

waterslappedagainstit.A pairofbrightyelloweyesandthe

tipsoftwopointedearsappearedfromthedepthsofthelake

andmoonlightreflectedonthewater.

Ashortpathwayledfromthelakesidetoacampingarea,and

inthemiddleofthecamp,afirecrackledwithembersand

ashrisingupwardsintothesky.Alogwasusedasabenchby

ayoungboy.Theboywatchedthefireashetoasted

marshmallows,oblivioustothecreaturewhichwasslowly

makingitswayupthepathtothecamp. Thecreaturerose

behindthechildsatbythefire.Atwigsnapped.Theyoung

boy-scoutwhippedhisheadaroundandleaptfromhisseat.

Themarshmallowsatontheendofastickandhethrustit

towardsthecreaturetoscareitoff.



Itwasaclear,warmnight.Cricketschirpedinthedistance,and

intermittentlyanowlhooted.Asolitaryboatbobbedonthe

lakeandfromtime-to-timethewaterslappedagainstit.

Moonlightreflectedlikediamondsonthewaterandslowly,

fromthedepthsofthelake,apairofbrightyelloweyesandthe

tipsoftwopointedearsmomentarilyappeared.

Ashort,leaf-litteredpathwayledfromthelakesidetoa

campingarea,andinthemiddleofthecamp,afirecrackled

withredembersandashrisingupwardsintothenightsky.By

thefire,afallenlogwasusedasamakeshiftbenchbyayoung

boy.Theboywatchedthefireashetoastedmarshmallows,

oblivioustothecreaturewhichwasslowlymakingitswayup

thepathtothecamp.Witheyesglaringandteethsnarling,the

creatureroseupwardstoastandingpositionbehindthechild

satbythefire.Atwigsnapped.Withouthesitation,theyoung

boy-scoutwhippedhisheadaroundandleaptfromhisseat,

legsshaking.Themarshmallowhehadbeentoastingsatpoised

ontheendofastickandhethrustittowardsthecreatureto

scareitoff.



1. TonguehangsoutAlongpinktonguelolledfromhismouthdowntohischin.

2. Startspanting

3. Tailstartswagging

4. Pupilschange- becomeround

5. Friendlyface- eyebrowsup

6. Stopsbaringteeth

7. Whimpersforfood

8. Smilesattheboy

9. Tiltshead



SURPRISESEditingMethod- Year3/4

Sayinhead

Rehearseinheadtolistentowhatimmediatelystandsout,whichsentencesareyouhappywith?Unhappywith?Markanythingyouthinkneedstochange.

Underbreath- mumble

Inamutteredvoice,begintoFEELhowthepiecefitstogether- areyoursentencesvariedenough?Areyoursentencelengthsvariedenough?

Readaloud

Haveyouaccidentallyrepeatedanything?Areyourtensescorrect?Doesitneedanythingaddingin?

Punctuationpower

Lookatyouruseofpunctuation- isitcorrect?Isitvariedenough?Haveyouusedcommasafterfrontedadverbials?

Readtheopeners

Isthereenoughvarietyinyouropeners?Haveyouusedfrontedadverbials?

Improveworrisomewords

Improvevocabularybycheckingyourwordchoicesparticularlyverbs,adjectivesandadverbs.

Sayinheadoraloud

Readitthroughtolistentohowitisnowsounding?Haveyoudoneenough?Hasitimproved?Whatmoreneedstobedone?Couldyoure-ordersomesentences

toimprovetheoveralleffect?

Extendingsentences

Lookatyoursentencechoices. Haveyouexpandedyournounphrases?Canyouaddinformationintoyoursentence?

Sharewithafriend

Togethercanyouimproveyourworkinanyotherways?Doesitfeelfinished?


Documents

Starter Sentences - Literacy Shed Plus · Starter Sentences The moonlight ... Are your tenses correct? Does it need ... Is it varied enough? Have you used commas after fronted adverbials?