South Yorkshire Resolution Committee embraces the C word in abundance…

Christmas, Children & Comedy!

We turn to our Clients with a heavy heart when they raise the issue of arrangements for children at Christmas. A perpetual quarrel between separated parents that is yet to be determined to any sufficient degree.

This year South Yorkshire Resolution didn’t want to leave it to Smarties to have the answer. Instead, the local Committee hosted an open debate on the very issue, entitled ‘This house believes children should be with the resident parent on Christmas Day!’

70 professionals made up of Solicitors, Barristers, Judges, Social Workers, Mediators and more filled

the room at the Hilton Hotel, Sheffield, for a night that is likely to be remembered for a long time to come.

Joined by a guest star line up, the panel included Sheffield’s Designated Family Judge, Her Honour Judge Carr QC, who chaired the debate, Simon Bickler QC, Taryn Lee QC, who recently took Silk, Jill Troy, who sits as Recorder regularly in Sheffield and David Hawkins, Barrister. The Committee opened up the floor for regional family professionals to thrash out whether children should wake up on Christmas morning with their main carer or elsewhere.

Lee and Hawkins were for the motion. Hawkins opened the debate, captivating the room with a side-splitting stint that had everyone in tears of laughter. Sporting a jester’s hat, he talked us though the coming changes in legislation that will introduce Child Arrangement Orders which in turn will abolish Residence and Contact, replacing the terms with less definitive wording, and in turn make shared parenting easier, some will say.

Hawkins’ position was simple. The child knows Santa comes down the chimney and that chimney should be the one in the home at which the child lives.

We heard tales of Baby Jesus, and what might have happened had he spent Christmas morning with his real father before Tiny Tim got the final words "God bless us, everyone!"

Lee, a true northern lady proud of her Cleethorpes roots took to the stage in true east coast cabaret style, emphatically singing her own remix of The Little Boy That Santa Forgot, with HHJ Carr as the evil protagonist in the story, confusing Santa with two chimneys, leaving a forgotten child in tears come present time on the 25th. Nat King Cole she wasn’t, but her explanation of the Norgrove Report coupled with her ability to laugh at herself gave rise to an eruption of applause when she hit her final note.

Bickler then fired an effective counter strike, taking a different approach than expected but equally as engaging nevertheless. Both he and Troy mounted an arsenal against tradition. Bickler shared his personal perspective. As a Jewish boy, he grew up having to wear all kinds of hats, literally and metaphorically speaking. His experience of ‘the best of both worlds’ left him feeling enriched as a child. ‘Why can’t children have it all?’ was his parting shot before handing over the mantle to Troy.

Not one to be outdone, lyrical genius Troy had reworked Lonnie Donegan’s classic hit, My Old Man’s a Dustman to illustrate the life of the District Bench once Public Funding cuts lead to a surge in self represented persons. Not allowing the comedy slant to overshadow the seriousness of the issue at hand, Troy’s words resonated with everyone in the room, many of whom will suffer once Public Funding becomes more scarce. She ended with a snigger at the ghosts of Christmas past and present, proudly depicting her case as that of the future.

To bring the debate to a close, HHJ Carr gave her Judgement. In the absence of an agreement between the parents, she would always fall on the side of the resident parent. She did go on to note however that in her years of experience, she has rarely been forced to impose an arrangement of this nature, with most cases proceeding by way of some agreement or

another.

The reaction in the room could not have been more to the contrary. An overwhelming majority vote in favour of Christmases being split between both parents was demonstrated by a show of hands. When asked if this affected her opinion, HHJ Carr firmly fired back a curt ‘no, with the exception of Jewish children, of course.’ She meant this completely tongue-in-cheek, and Bickler joined in the laughter, which demonstrates how relaxed and at ease everyone in the room was following such a fun filled furore.

That’s the beauty of South Yorkshire Resolution. It is a group of family practitioners that really do sign up to the Resolution Code of resolving matters as constructively and amicably as possible, acknowledging that there are always two sides to every tale, whether it’s Tiny Tim or Scrooge telling the story.

Alison Straw stepped down as Chair of the local Committee after 2 years after being congratulated for her sterling efforts, and I stepped down as a Committee Member after 2 years to make way for new blood in 2013.

The evening was a resounding success made all the more special by the fact that the Committee was able to donate a cheque to the Stephen Switalski Trust. Stephen was a much loved and highly respected Barrister who sadly died a short time ago. The Trust has been set up to support children and families struggling to cope with Court Proceedings.

What is Resolution?

Resolution’s 6,500 members are family lawyers committed to the constructive resolution of family disputes. Our members follow a Code of Practice that promotes a non-confrontational approach to family problems. Our members encourage solutions that consider the needs of the whole family - and in particular the best interests of children.

For more information, contact your new local Chair, Vanessa Fox, of HLW Keeble Hawson.