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Making an effort at making friends abroad
*
*
*Korea is a very introduction-based culture, if I make one
friend, I can inherit 10 more.
*In the U.S., this will not likely be the case. You will have to
take the initiative.
*So you may ask yourself, “How can I connect with American
students?”
*
*What are 3 appropriate conversation starters?
*What are 3 topics we shouldn’t discuss when we meet
new people?
*
*Weather: This one is always safe and can open doors to other
topics.
*Common Interests: Maybe you want to talk to someone in your
class about the course or things to do on campus.
*Sports: Americans generally love sports.
There are so many, but these are three easy suggestions.
*
As we discussed some last time…
*Religion
*Money
*Politics
Religion: Once again, unless you want to get into
this topic, avoid it. You should have plenty of
other things to talk about without bringing this
up.
Money: It’s common in Asia for people to ask me
how much I make in a month, but in the U.S.
this is very off-limits. It’s a private matter
unless the other person brings it up.
Politics: As we’ve discussed, Americans will
often bring up politics, but it’s not something
you should discuss during a first meeting. Do
not feel pressured to talk about it.
If the university sets up a social event for you,
GO!! It’s the easiest way to meet people if you
are shy.
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*Bars
*Cafés
*House Parties
*
Bars (especially college bars) aren’t like they are
in Korea. In many cases, Americans go to bars to
meet new people. In Korean university bars,
mostly groups of students already know each
other or are grouped in booths. American bars
are a much freer atmosphere.
*
What are 3 ways to start a conversation in a
local or campus café?
*1. Same book
*2. Same drink
*3. The person across from you (almost anytime)
Campus and near-campus cafés can become
quite crowded! Don’t be alarmed if someone
asks you if they can share the table with you.
This is also a great way to start a conversation!
You never know, they may have a lot in common
with you.
*
Probably the biggest difference in the way U.S.
students socialize compared to Koreans is the
house party. Many students are either too young
for or can’t afford the bar. The house party is
an alternative for meeting new people. You may
be invited to one! Here are three things to
remember if you are.
*
Knowing who is hosting the party can go a long
way in making a good impression and new
connections.
*
Compliments go a long way for anyone.
Take the time to say something nice about what
someone is wearing. You never know where the
conversation can go!
*
Moving around the house and smiling will almost
certainly invite a conversation. Remember, a lot
of American students have not been abroad
(especially to Asia) and might be intimidated by
you. Smiling can help diffuse the tension, and
you may teach them more than they will teach
you!
*
What if you try class, the bars, the cafés, and a
house party and still can’t make a friend in your
short time there? Well, you are on a university
campus, and there are so many students just
like you there. Reach out to the international
community. I did in China.
*
*
*Money
*Demands on your time--Learn time management
strategies.
*You may never get another chance to go abroad,
so you have to make the most of this chance.
Don’t let money stop you from taking a weekend
trip. Budget, talk to your friends about sharing
costs to see something new.
*
Let’s talk food!