small group proposal · Web viewElements of a Small Group 5 B. Covenanting in a Small Group (for first meeting) 5 C. How to Lead Sharing Time 6 Levels of Sharing/Followup Questions6

Small Group Training Manual for Facilitators/Shepherds

ByGregory Chao

4/14/2014

PCOM Small Group Manual, Rev. 2.0 Page 1

Table of Contents

PCOM SMALL GROUPS (GETTING STARTED)...................................................................3

Purpose........................................................................................................................ 3Facilitator/Shepherd..................................................................................................... 3Overview of Meetings................................................................................................... 3

TRAINING MATERIAL WITH EXERCISES............................................................................5

A. Elements of a Small Group....................................................................................... 5B. Covenanting in a Small Group (for first meeting)..............................................................5C. How to Lead Sharing Time......................................................................................6

Levels of Sharing/Followup Questions...................................................................6Using Sharing Exercises......................................................................................... 7

D. How to Lead Bible Study.........................................................................................................8Leading the Bible Study......................................................................................... 8Dealing with Problems during the Discusion.........................................................8Communication Skills............................................................................................9Caring through Giving Feedback (Constructive Criticism)....................................10

E. How to Lead Prayer Time.......................................................................................10Principles of Prayer.............................................................................................11Types of Group Prayer......................................................................................... 11Gradual Introduction of Conversational Prayer...................................................11Other Ideas for Prayer......................................................................................... 12

F. Ending the Small Group (How to have Closure)...............................................................12Small Group Evaluation Sheet (Printable)............................................................14

G. Resources for Small Groups...................................................................................15

APPENDIX: SMALL GROUP INTERACTION IDEAS............................................................16

ATTACHMENT: SMALL GROUP CONVENANT PRINTABLE SHEET....................................24

ATTACHMENT: BIBLE STUDIES IN GALATIANS...............................................................26


PCOM Small Groups (Getting Started)

PurposeTo provide a setting where people can experience God’s love and nurture in an

accepting and confidential setting. We desire that each member participate by encouraging others to be disciples of Christ in knowledge, values and lifestyle.

Facilitator/Shepherd RoleA. Be a follower of Jesus Christ as your Savior and Lord and committed to PCOM

including:a. Commitment to the Bible as the inspired and infallible Word of Godb. Living a morally clean Spirit-led life obedient to the principles of Scripturec. Faithful member of PCOM in service, attendance and tithing

B. You will organize the small group time including:a. Setting up the time and place and invitationsb. Facilitating the sharing time, discussions (don’t need to be a biblical scholar) and

prayer timec. Following up on the members of the groupd. Spot any special needs and help (extra-attention, a phone call, etc.)

C. Commitmenta. Attend the Small group trainingb. Be present at the Recruiting table on Sundayc. Facilitate/Shepherd small group for 7 weeksd. Attend Post-small group meetinge. (Optional) Continue to meet with group for additional 8 weeks on your own.

Overview of Meetings1. Weekly Time - You will be meeting once a week for 1 ½ - 2 hours (duration is your

choice) for 7 weeks.

2. Typical Meeting Time - Each week you will facilitate three activities; Sharing time, Bible study and Prayer.a. A typical time allocation for the three activities is sharing time (30 mins.), Bible

Study time (30-45 mins.) and Prayer time (15-30 mins.)

3. Pre-work – Before the first meeting, activities include:a. Recruiting – There will be church wide recruiting effort to assist in the recruiting.

There will be pulpit announcements, sermons and a sign up table 2-3 weeks prior to the start of the groups. You will be asked to be present at the sign up table to help with recruiting. You are encouraged to personally recruit people to your group.


b. Logistics – Once you get the list of people in your group, please contact them (email, text, phone, etc.) to confirm. Print out the Small group Covenants (see Training Material under “Covenanting in Small Group,” p. 5, 25).

4. First Meetinga. Logistics - Make sure you have a quiet room and set up chairs/couches in a circle

with no (or little barriers) between you. Name tags are helpful. Welcome people as they arrive. Light refreshments are good. Before the meeting, print out the Bible study questions from the bulletin.

b. Introductions (5 mins.) – After gathering everyone into the circle of chairs with a warm welcome, begin by short introductions and announcements. Make sure and collect contact information (email, phone numbers, etc.). Let people know that they will need a Bible (have a few extra on hand).

c. Purpose (first meeting only for 10 mins.)i. Let the group know what the purpose of the group is (see above)ii. Hand out and Read the Small group Covenants. Ask the group what they

think of these covenants. Ask if they can abide by them.d. Sharing Exercise (30 mins.) – Conduct one of the sharing exercises (see Training

Material under “How to Lead Sharing Time,” p. 6).e. Bible Study (35 mins.) – Conduct the Bible Study using questions from the

bulletin and supplementary question supplied by email (see Training Material under “How to Lead Bible Study,” p. 8).

f. Prayer (10 mins.) – Conduct Prayer Time. Start with Modified Conversational Prayer and feel free trying other methods as the weeks progress (see Training Material under “How to Lead Prayer Time,” p.10)

g. Ending the Time – End with more fellowship and refreshments

5. Middle Meetings - In the first few meetings, allocate at least 30 mins. to the sharing exercise. As the weeks progress, you can allocate less time to sharing and more time to Bible Study. 45 minutes is a good duration for Bible Study. You will be using questions supplied in the bulletin (I may sent you supplementary questions through email). Make sure and leave 15 minutes for the prayer time each week. It is highly recommended that you contact members occasionally during the week (email, phone, mail) to thank them for participating and to provide any additional support if needed.

6. Last Meeting – See Training Material under “Ending the Small Group,” p. 13. It includes pointers on a sharing exercise, evaluation, & good closure. Print out the evaluation sheet before the meeting to give to each member. Bring to the Post-meeting training. Collect the names of people who might be interested in joining another small group and notify Ken Dillard.


Training Material with Exercises

A. Elements of a Small GroupA Christian small group is an intentional face to face encounter of no more than 12 people who meet on a regular basis with the purpose of growing in the knowledge and likeness of Christ. (Hestenes and Gorman). Any more than 12 will make the logistic of the group more difficult.

A typical small group will have a time for sharing, Bible study, and prayer each week. Service and ministry projects will come spontaneously as needs arise in the group or can be planned as a special event.

1. Fellowship/Sharing - Members share their histories and current concerns. As more and more trust develops, the sharing will become deeper and more personal. Confidentiality is absolutely essential within the group.

2. Bible Study - A time of exploring God's Word and learning from it. Key is the application of the Word into our lives.

3. Prayer - Prayer is a key element and it will tie the group together. Members usually pray conversationally and as led by the Holy Spirit.

4. (Optional) Worship - Worship is the key to opening ourselves up to the inner work of the Spirit. When we worship, differences and problems seem to become insignificant, and we become free to love and accept one another. Most important, it is the group's ministry to the Lord.

B. Covenanting in a Small Group (for first meeting)All Christian small groups should develop a clear sense of purpose. Group members should understand this purpose and voluntarily promise to work toward achieving it. This promise is sometimes called a covenant. Forming a covenant makes it clear that each individual is important to the group. It clarifies the expectations and clears the way for deep love and commitment to occur. It is imperative for the survival and progress of a group.

Covenants may be discussed and revised at any time. If persons renege on commitments, the group can rethink its decisions. For example, "It seems to be hard for all of us to be here at the time we decided to begin our group. What would you like to do: adjust the time, recommit ourselves to what we decided, discuss issues that prevent our being present on time, or what?" In addition to the covenants, there are logistical agreements or ground rules that need to be established.

Print out the covenants principles before the meeting (see Attachments, p.25). When you discuss the covenants and agreements, try to get a discussion going so that


everyone is involved. Here are a questions you can use to get the discussion going, “Which of these principles is especially important to you and why?” After the discussion, you can ask the group, “ Can I assume that there is no objections to abiding by this covenant?”

Small Group Covenants

1. Affirmation: There is nothing you have done or will do that will make me stop loving you. I may not agree with your actions, but I will love you unconditionally.

2. Confidentiality: What is said here stays here! An open atmosphere flourishes when others are trustworthy. I will never repeat what another has said unless given specific permission.

3. Openness: I will strive to reveal who I am-my hopes, hurts, backgrounds, joys, and struggles-as well as I am able.

4. Sensitivity: I will try to put myself in your shoes and understand what it is like to be you. I will try to hear you, see you, and feel where you are, to draw you out of the pit of discouragement or withdrawal. But I recognize that you have the individual right to remain silent.

5. Accountability: I am responsible for my own growth. I will not blame others for my feelings. None of us are trapped into behaviors that are unchangeable. I am accountable to myself, others, and God to become what God has designed me to be in His loving creation. I will help you become what you can be.

Adapted from Em Griffin, Getting Together

Exercise 1 – Gather in a small group and have one person role play explaining, discussing, and getting agreement from the group concerning the covenants.

C. How to Lead Sharing TimeLevels of Sharing/Follow up Questions - There are different levels of sharing and it is normal for a newly formed small group to begin at a fairly superficial level before

members can trust each other. Over time, the group should achieve sharing at both level 1 and 2 (see below) with ease. If the members in the group begin to share at level 3 (feelings), it is a sign that the members trust each other. At this point, God has given the group a gift of community and trust.

Level 1 (chit chat and news) - This is the easiest to share. It involves sharing information, facts, or opinions that are not personal. People share common interest and things in common. Most groups start at this level since little trust is required. Chit


chat can be a good ice breaker before going on to deeper levels since it allows people to "test the waters."Level 2 (Concerns and Values) - This is more difficult to share and requires some trust. Sharing concerns, past history, or important values would fall into this category. This level tends to be more cognitive and thoughtful.Level 3 (Feelings here and now) - This is the most difficult to share and requires great trust. Sharing here and now feelings such as fear, love, doubt, guilt, or joy require vulnerability and risk. Intimacy occurs when people share at this level. Since it is difficult, it is a gift to the group when a person chooses to share at this level. The facilitator should recognize this and show great appreciation. Feedback (constructive criticism) would fall into this area of sharing.

Follow-up questions are questions that one can use after a group member has shared something to allow them to go deeper. It tends to be more natural and spontaneous than sharing questions and can be used anytime. For example, a person may say "I visited my father yesterday" and stop. A follow up question might be, "Was it enjoyable?" inviting the person to share how he/she felt about the occasion. Notice that the person shared at level 1 but the follow up question is inviting the person to share at level 2 or 3. Some other follow up questions might be:

How did you feel about it?You must have felt....Are you saying that...Let me see if I understand you correctly...Tell us more about...What was it like…

Encouraging others to share deeply often requires a spark or catalyst. Someone has to be the first to take the risk and share something deep. Often, it will happen spontaneously during the sharing time. A good facilitator can recognize this (the Holy Spirit will give you insight) and seize the moment. The facilitator should keep the focus on that person, invite him/her to share more by affirming them, asking follow up questions, and showing appreciation for his/her risk taking.

Using Sharing Exercises – In the Appendix is a collection of Sharing Exercises that we highly recommend that you use during different weeks. You should read over the ideas and select one (or more) to use during each week. (See Appendix under “Small Group Interaction Ideas,” p. 17).

Exercise 2 - Gather in a small group and have one person role play using sharing questions “Sharing Questions,” p.22. Also, try “Picture Association I,” p.20.

D. How to Lead the Bible StudyLeading the Bible Study - Here are some pointers for leading the Bible Study.


1. Watch the time - Begin on time and end on time. Make sure you allocate enough time for application questions.

2. Read the passage first - Have one person read the passage. Going around reading sections tend to make the passage choppy and will embarrass some who are less skilled at reading.

3. Discussion - After first response, ask if anyone else has something to add, then go on at a rather brisk pace.

4. Silence - Don't be afraid of silence. People need time to think. If you sense the question is too vague or hard to understand, reword it and try again.

5. Avoid answering your own questions - Trust the questions. If you answer the questions, you will prevent discussion from occurring.

6. Try to affirm whenever possible - Nod your head, thank people for their input, verbally agree with members after they respond.

7. Never reject an answer - If you get a wild answer, ask them where in the passage they see it. Ask others to contribute and let the group handle it.

8. Avoid going off in tangents - If people go off course, gently bring them back to the passage.

9. Make sure there is enough time for application - Since this is the most important part of the study, make sure there is enough time for it. You can word several questions with varying degrees of depth.

Dealing with Problems during the Discussion - Here are some pointers for dealing with problems during discussions.

1. Losing focus, drifting discussion - Politely intervene and point out the drifting tendency. Call the group back to the topic. Determine if the group wishes to change directions and pursue the new topic and/or schedule it for a future meeting.

2. Silence after asking a question - Trust your question, do not jump in too fast. The members need time to think. If the question is hard to understand, reword it or move on to the next question.

3. Personal opinions projected as a group opinion - Offer a friendly reminder to speak only for oneself is sufficient.

4. Failure to recognize a member's contribution - Call the group back to the unresolved question. Affirm the questioner even though the question may not be appropriate.

5. Unbalanced participation patterns - Conclude your question with "let's hear from someone who hasn't commented yet." or "Are there any other comments?"

6. Hostility toward a person's idea - Interrupt tactfully. Affirm the right to disagree. Remind both individuals of the covenant of affirmation and suggest whatever restitution is necessary to calm feelings.

7. Member dominates group discussion - Talk with the person in private. Ask for his/her assistance in allowing others to participate. In extreme cases, while affirming the value of his/her participation, ask the person to consciously limit his/her verbal response.


8. Inappropriate timing and use of humor - Talk with the person in private. He/she may not realize the problem he/she is creating.

9. Poor attendance - Contact the person by telephone. Determine the cause for being absent. If the reason is legitimate, express concern, ask if assistance is needed and state your anticipation of the person's return.

10. Inappropriate expectations - Talk with the person outside the group. Explore the possibility of seeking professional counseling. Encourage the group member to support this person outside the group meetings.

Adapted from How to Lead Small Groups by Neal McBride.

Exercise 3 – You will get a sample Bible Study. Gather in a small group and have one person role play the facilitator to lead the discussion to practice some of the principles in this section titled “Leading the Bible Study.”

Exercise 4 - You will get a sample Bible Study. Gather in a small group and have one person role play the facilitator and other person in the group pick one of the problems and act it out.

Communication Skills - Here are some pointers for improving your communication skills. Small group dynamics can be improved with good communication skills. Listed below are some of these characteristics. As a facilitator, you should practice these skills and model them to others.

1. Attending - A caring listener physically and emotionally focuses on the speaker. He/she is facing the speaker, giving good eye contact, nodding, or verbally tracking with the speaker.

2. Inclusion - To include everyone in the discussion, members can be sensitive to silent members and encourage them by asking questions like, "John, what do you think?" or "Who knows something about...?" or "Does anyone else have a comment?" or "Does anyone else have anything to add?"

3. Paraphrasing - One way to let the speaker know that you are listening is to paraphrase. A caring listener will say back to the speaker in his/her own words what he/she thinks the speaker is saying. This lets the speaker know that you are really attempting to hear.

4. Clarification - Another method for communicating that you are listening is to ask clarification questions. A caring listener will ask questions to clear up any possible confusion. For example, he/she can say "I'm not sure what you meant by ..." or "Could you run that by me again?" or "Are you saying that..." or "I'm a little confused. Is this what you are saying...?”

5. Redirecting - When the facilitator is asked a question, the facilitator can turn to a member of the group and ask "I'd be interested in what Tom has to say about this?" This is a way for the facilitator to encourage discussion rather than dominating.


6. "I" message instead of "You" messages - When expressing a feeling, uncertainty or opinion, a skilled communicator uses "I" instead of "You." such as "I feel hurt when you say that" rather than "You are a hurtful person" This will keep you from blaming or accusing others and focus on expressing your own feelings.

Caring through Giving Feedback (constructive criticism) - At times feedback or constructive criticism needs to be given to members of the group. If done properly, it can build trust. If done improperly, the receiver will become defensive and withdraw or get angered. In love, we are commanded to correct one another and often, it is unloving to avoid it. Here are some tips to follow.

1. Describe rather than pass judgment - No one should feel condemned as a person. Avoid accusing. Instead of "You are nasty" say "I felt myself growing angry when you..." Express positive feelings which are sincere.

2. Be as specific as possible - Don't say “you are dominating," rather give details of the behavior and specific cases.

3. Consider the needs of the receiver - Think about what the receiver can hear, accept, and handle.

4. Deal only with behaviors not character and only behaviors that the receiver can change - It is good to focus on behavior rather than characteristic that are difficult to change. Insure that the person does not feel trapped, unable to change.

5. Don't force feedback on another - Let the recipient invite comments. If he/she indicates he/she does not want to hear more, stop.

6. Check to see if the feedback is understood - Watch for reactions and possibly restate your points.

7. See if others agree with you - Ask questions like "How do the rest of you feel?" Be willing to be wrong.

8. Expect slow movement - This is difficult for the group and the recipient. A group may be very hesitant to express its feelings openly and it may take a long time.

Adapted from Building Christian Community through Small Groups and Using the Bible Roberta Hestenes

E. How to Lead the Prayer TimePurpose - To provide an opportunity for people to pray with and for each other. Praying together builds relationships on a deeper level, and it allows us to get to know each other better through sharing of needs and finding out what is important to each of us. It develops an awareness of the unity we have in Christ. It allows the group to experience the presence of Christ and see actual answers to prayers as the weeks go by.

Principles of Prayer - As Jesus taught on the Sermon on the Mount (Matt 5-7), prayer... is an expression of the heart rather than the preciseness of the wording need not be flowery but can be simple and direct is not ritualistic or religious sounding


should have elements of thanksgiving and adoration should have practical requests

Types of Group Prayer - Introduce a prayer time and tailor it to the needs of the group. Here are some suggestions.

a) Modified Conversational Prayer - Have people share their requests and you can record them. Then before going into a prayer time, go down the list and ask for volunteers (don't force) to pray for the requests. This will give each member a chance to think about it before they actually pray. During the prayer time, leave it open until all the volunteers have prayed and then close. Although not spontaneous, it provides a way for the less comfortable to get use to praying.

b) Focused Prayer - The facilitator beforehand gives the members a topic to focus on like thanksgiving. This helps the members direct their thoughts. The facilitator can then change the focus during the prayer time. Some have used the acronym ACTS (adoration, confession, thanksgiving, supplication) as a guide.

c) Subgroups - Divide the group into twos or threes and have them share request and pray for each other. This is less threatening.

d) Conversational Prayer – This is the most spontaneous and free form type of prayer yet the most difficult to implement. Members engage in prayer as they would a conversation where several may prayer over the same request from their unique point of view.

Gradual Introduction of Conversational Prayer - You can gradually introduce conversational prayer by allowing members to take smaller steps.

Session #1 - Facilitator opens and closes with prayer Session #2 - Facilitator opens and introduces a focused time of prayer on

thanksgiving where members can just say "Jesus, thank you for ..." The responses can just be brief phrases.

Session #3 - Same as session #2 but adds prayer of petition "Jesus, help me with..." Session #4 - Each person gets a prayer request for the person on the right. A time is

given for each to pray that request. Session #5 - Same as #4 except pair off and pray in twos. Ask them to continue to

pray during the week Session #6 - Same as #5 except prayer requests are gathered from the larger group

first before pairing people off to pray. Introduce conversational prayer. Session #7 - Conversational prayer with the whole group.

Adapted from Building Christian Community through Small Groups Roberta Hestenes

Other Ideas for Prayer - Here are some different ideas you can try to keep variety in the prayer times.

1. Keep a prayer journal. Record prayer items and keep track of God's answers.2. Divide into smaller groups to pray for one another


3. Have prayer partners over the week4. Dedicate whole group session to prayer. Study it, talk about it, and do it5. Laying on of hands - If there is a person in need of prayer, you can have him/her sit in

the middle and have the rest of the group gather round and lay hands on him/her. Then, members can spontaneously pray for the person with one person opening and closing the prayer time. Laying on of hands communicates deep love and concern to the person being prayed for.

6. Use both silent and audible prayer. At times you may want to ask people to pray silently to themselves, or use silent prayer as preliminary preparation to set the tone for audible prayer.

7. Write prayers. Whether it is a response to a passage being studied or as a separate activity. Writing prayers and the reading them out loud is a meaningful experience for many groups

8. Pray spontaneously when the need arises. You can ask the group to stop in the middle of sharing or Bible study and have a special time of prayer.

Adapted from How to Lead Small Groups by Neal McBride

Exercise 5 –Gather in a small group and have one person role play the facilitator and lead the modified conversational prayer.

F. Ending the Small Group (How to Have Closure)

Small groups are not an end in themselves. They are simply the vehicles that enable us to be the people that God intends us to be. They are the vehicles for support and spiritual growth in our lives. But, all groups come to an end.

Whenever your group ends you must remember that the things you as a member have given and received, the ways in which you have grown, the skills you have learned, will continue with you. In addition, the special friendships you have made with the other members will never end. There will always be a deep bond between you and the others. Also, there is no reason you cannot have reunions to maintain contact.

Breaking off relationships may be sad, but the ways in which you have grown can be applied to groups you will be a part of in the future. So make the ending of your group a positive celebration, freeing people to look forward to future involvement in small groups. Here are some suggestions:

1. Sharing Exercise - Pick a sharing exercise that gives members an opportunity to affirm each other. We suggest sharing exercises like The Back Game, Letters of Gratitude, Giving Spiritual Gifts, or the Affirmation Chair (descriptions found in the Appendix under “Small Group Interaction Ideas”).


2. Discussion - Discuss what you have gained by being in the group? Discuss how you feel about the group winding up its activities?

3. Prayer - Have a prayer time recounting all of God's answers to prayer during your time together. May include changed lives, attitudes... Can result in a very worshipful time, giving praises, thanksgivings, and adoration.

4. Post meetings - Go outside to lunch or dinner or do something special together. Have times of reunion afterwards just for a time to share and pray.

Evaluating the Small Group - Our goal for small groups is that people have a positive experience with one another and the Lord. We need some way of determining if this is happening. Evaluation promotes quality. It builds in accountability and it helps us improve.

People might have various attitudes about evaluation. Some may think that it is a waste of time. Others may fear negative results. Still others may believe that you cannot evaluate spiritual matters.

The Bible teaches us to be discerning and test ourselves (II Corth. 13:5,Hebrew 4:12, Galatians 6:4). Evaluation is a part of the Christian life because we are not perfect yet and sin is still influencing us. We need to have a humble attitude, an open attitude of learning and a desire to improve.

Fearing negative results stems from the false connection of our performance with who we are. This is a lie. The Bible tells us that we are God’s children, always loved and cherished by Him. We can then sever the connection between our performance and God’s acceptance of us because He will always love us. We can then approach looking at our performance without fear and rejection.

The following printable evaluation sheet is provided for you to use during your last meeting. Print this sheet before the meeting and have each member fill it out.


Small Group Evaluation Sheet

1 - Excellent 2 - Good 3 - Average 4 - Fair 5 - Poor

1. Size of Group2. Use of Time3. Leadership4. Material Used5. Relationship with each other6. Climate of Trust7. Freedom to be oneself8. Acceptance of each other's faults9. Concern for other's struggles10. Understanding of Bible passages11. Application of Scripture to daily life12. Prayer13. Worship14. Outreach15. Communication of ideas16. Communication of feelings17. Group confrontation with Christ18. Personal growth within the group19. Worship life of the Group

1 2 3 4 51 2 3 4 51 2 3 4 51 2 3 4 51 2 3 4 51 2 3 4 51 2 3 4 51 2 3 4 51 2 3 4 51 2 3 4 51 2 3 4 51 2 3 4 51 2 3 4 51 2 3 4 51 2 3 4 51 2 3 4 51 2 3 4 51 2 3 4 51 2 3 4 5

The strong points of our group are:

Aspects that could have been improved:

The group has helped me:

(If your group will end and you are interested in joining a small group, let your leader know. We will try to place you in new or existing covenant groups.)


Resources for Small Groups

Here is a list of resources for further reading.

Books for Small Group Facilitators1. Using the Bible in Groups, Roberta Hestenes; covers all the basics on small groups

including leadership, communication skills, Bible studies, prayer, and sharing2. Community that is Christian: A Handbook on Small Groups, Julie Gorman; Good

sections on Biblical basis of small groups. Strategic book for setting up small group ministries. Covers small group dynamics and research.

3. How to Lead Small Groups, Neal McBride; covers all the basics in a simple straightforward fashion that is very practical. Good lists.

4. Good Things Come in Small Groups, Steve Barker; Good section on worship5. Building Christian Community through Small Groups, Roberta Hestenes; an

expanded syllabus with great sections on sharing questions and prayer6. Equipping the Saints: A Small Group Leaders Handbook, Rick Petersen; Excellent

summary of all the basics. Worth studying.7. Getting Together, A Guide for Good Groups, Em Griffin; Good section on decision

making8. Seven Myths about Small Groups: How to Keep from Falling into Common Traps,

Dan Williams; Good practical wisdom on myths such as "groups should last forever," or "bigger is better." Good section on choosing Bible Study material.


G. Appendix – Small Group Interaction Ideas

The following are suggestions to help you stimulate communication within your small group. These methods are mainly for initial ice-breaker and interaction exercises; hopefully your group will not become dependent upon them. Consider them in prayer before implementation. Pray for your group, open in prayer and let God's Spirit move.

1) COMPLETE THE SENTENCE is an exercise to help people become familiar with each other, to get to know some information about that person and to help find common interests and viewpoints. Have each person complete the sentence. A lot of these questions are good openers as introduction to your lesson or study topic. Use your imagination.

1. My favorite kind of literature is… why?2. My favorite room in a house is… why?3. If I could ask God one question, I would ask Him this . . .4. I feel most alone when …5. My favorite holiday of the year is6. The Lord taught me…this week.7. Name one attribute of God you most appreciate or admire this week.8. I am the happiest when …9. I am closest to God when…10. My idea of a good time is doing …11. I feel the most loving towards others when I'm …12. My favorite all time spiritual song is …

2) REMINISCING helps people to analyze their hanging values and priorities, to think back on the changes in their life, and to see how the Lord has been working.

1. What was the center of warmth in your life when you were a child? (this can be a person, place or time of year)

2. When did God first become a “warm” person to you, and how did it happen?3. My first date was like …4. The first time I ever played hookey from school was when..5. The first time I ever drove a car…6. When I first accepted Christ, I felt…7. When I first came to PCOM I felt . . . and now I feel . . .8. The first person I had a crush on was …9. My hero with I was younger was…(singer, star, etc.)

3) BELIEVING: We develop certain beliefs during our life that we hold strongly to. This exercise reveals not only our convictions, but also our priorities - as the most


important things will most likely be mentioned first here. Have your group write down their beliefs and share them with the group. Here are some examples:

1. I believe in God and his love.2. I believe in His power and the guarantee of my salvation.3. I believe in people and that they are important and worthwhile.

4) THE FLAG GAME: Have your group draw a flag with four compartments. Then have them fill in the compartments with the following ideas. You may also develop your own ideas.

1. Draw your great achievement2. Write what you'd like to talk about.3. Draw how you feel today4. Draw yourself as you'd like to see

yourself in the future.

5) YOUR SPIRITUAL PILGRIMAGE: Have your group draw a graph of their spiritual life up till the present, complete with ups and downs. Be sure to include symbols along the way to symbolize important events. For instance, the cross could stand for the day they accepted Christ, the tree could stand for a camp they went to, the Bible could stand for when they really got into the Word then, etc.

6) BILLFOLD SCAVENGER HUNT is a show and tell exercise. Have everyone take out four items from their wallets and explain them accordingly. Find and share:

1. The most worthless item.2. The most cherished and priceless item.3. The most memorable item.4. The most revealing item (you may interpret this any way you want)

7) DESCRIPTIVE SHARING: the group uses their creativity to analyze and describe themselves as they see themselves. Have them describe themselves to the group by using such analogies such as comparing themselves with a building, an animal, a weather condition, a room, a sport, etc. For example, someone might describe their room as being messy because they are in a state of confusion right now, or they


might say that their room is painted bright yellow because they are basically a very warm and happy person.

8) FRUIT INSPECTION: In Galatians 5:22-23, scripture lists gifts, virtues and strengths that can be made into affirmation exercises. Study each fruit carefully and jot down the names of the people in your group next to those particular traits in which you feel they are the strongest. When everyone is through, one person sits quietly while the others share how they see him and why. Then that person will in turn share two fruits about himself: a) one where he sees himself as strong, and b) one where he sees himself as weak.

Love - the giving person, caring, sensitive to others' needs)Joy - exuberance sunny and cheerful, lives life to the -fullest)Peace - quiet inner serenity, having come to terms with God and yourselfPatience - staying power, enduring trying times without getting uptightKindness - warm-hearted, gracious and always helpful, thinks of othersGoodness - unimpeachable full of integrityFaithfulness - never forgets, a friend, always there when needed. loyalGentleness - strength wrapped in understanding and tendernessSelf –Control - keeps cool, stable in controlling emotions and actions

9) GOD IS many characteristics and attributes. He is many things to many people. And we each see different facets of God during different times of our lives. He meets all our needs and is many things to us at all times. Have each person think about what God is to him during these times.

I see God as (name characteristics and attributes):

1. When I'm sitting in church worship service.2. When I'm into finals week.3. When I'm in trouble.4. When I'm scared and confused.5. When I'm closest to Him.6. When I feel all alone and depressed.

You may think up of some more situations where God meant different things to you at that time. This exercise will help people become more aware of their relationship with God. The more you can see and be aware of His hand in your life the more real he will become, and the stronger your faith in His power and promises.


10) PICTURE ASSOCIATION I: Simply ask each person to look at the picture below and then ask this question, “Which child would you identify with in your spiritual life right now? And why?


11) PICTURE ASSOCIATION II - Simply ask each person to look at the picture below and then ask this question, “Which face would you identify with in your spiritual life right now? And why?


12) THE BACK CAME: Have each person tape a blank card onto his or her back. Now have each person in the group go around the room, writing words of encouragement or appreciation on each other’s backs.

13) LETTERS OF GRATITUDE: Have each person take out a piece of paper and put their name on top. Then circulate the papers around until everyone has had a chance to write letters to each other.

14) GIVING SPIRITUAL GIFTS: A good way to end the group is with the giving of Spiritual Gifts. Take one person at a time, and have everyone give him one gift. For instance, someone might give him the gift of self-control to get him through difficult times or patience to help him bear his trials.

15) THE AFFIRMATION CHAIR - This is a wonderful exercise where a person is designated to sit in a chair. The others go around affirming the person in the chair by telling him/her what they appreciate about him/her and what gifts they see. After going around, another person in selected to sit in the chair and the process is repeated. That way, each person will have an opportunity to tell each member what they appreciate about each person. This exercise may take a while so allocate some extra time.

16) SHARING QUESTIONS: Here is a list of additional sharing question you can use. Always give members the option of not answering the question by declaring “pass.”

1. Describe your salvation experience.2. What is your favorite Bible passage and why?3. How did you meet your spouse? What qualities do you most value about him/her?4. What about PCOM do you most appreciate?5. If you could ask God a question, what would it be?6. What values do you strive to instill in your children? (use only if everyone has children)7. What would you like to be remembered for at the end of your life?8. What one area in your life would you like to develop?9. Name a time when you felt proud of your child. (use only if everyone group has

children)10. What values do you try to bring into your work (use only if everyone works)11. Using the following scales, how would you describe yourself

happy seriousthoughtful doeractive sedatetrusting doubterpeople person loneroptimistic pessimistictalkative quiet


12. What improvement would you like to see in your present vocation by next year?13. What hobby do you enjoy?14. After a hard day at work/school, how do you relax with your friends?15. The most frightening experience I ever had was...16. Who was the most influential person in your life (besides Christ) and why?17. What one quality in your Christian life do you want to be good at in 5 years?18. What is one thing that has helped your prayer life and one thing that has hindered it?19. If you had the ability to do anything you desired in terms of ministry, what would it be?20. What is one characteristic from your parents you want to keep? want to change?21. What adjective could best describe your week? What triggered good feelings? bad?22. If you could go back and change anything in your life, what would it be?23. What are the 2 or 3 most valuable possessions you have? Why are they valuable to

you?24. Describe your ideal home and how you would furnish it?25. What is one good thing you have gotten from this group?26. If you were given a check for 1 million dollars, how would you spend it?27. Who was the most influential person in your childhood and why?28. What was the most memorable holiday you ever took and why?29. What has been your most important spiritual experience?30. What was the most exciting (challenging, difficult, growth producing, enjoyable, or

terrible) part of your life up to now and why?31. What is one part of your life that you enjoy, and one part that is difficult for you?32. What is your favorite spot in your home and why?33. What is the one thing you worried about or struggled with this week?34. What is one decision you find difficult and why?35. What is one thing you do well and one thing that you struggle with?36. Where are you changing or growing in your life, and what helps and what hinders the

process?37. What is one relationship you would like to strengthen, and what steps could you take to

develop it?38. If you could accomplish one positive change for the good of our church, what would it

be?39. How do you want your children to remember you?40. What is one dream or hope you have for the future?41. What is one quality that you value or admire in one or more members of this group?42. If you could give a special gift to each member of our group, what would it be and why?43. What spiritual gifts do you see present in one or more members of this group? 44. What do you believe God wants you to do this week and how do you intend on doing it?45. How will you practice thankfulness to God this week?46. What is a turning point in your life?47. On a scale of 1 to 10, what level of stress did you experience last week and explain?48. What character or attribute of Jesus do you appreciate the most at this time in you life?49. What is an area in your life that Christ has changed the way you think act, or feel?


50. What are some people that you have authority over and how do you try to handle that authority well?

51. What qualities do you value in your friends and why?52. What is it about God that has given you the most assurance or comfort recently?53. What is an example in your life in which Scripture has touched you?54. What are the two most pressing issues in your life right now?55. When was a time where you stood up for something you thought was right?56. When you were growing up, what was your view of God? What was He like now?57. Share a time where you were challenged to show kindness to someone, even though it

was difficult.58. When was a time in which you were hot for the Lord and when was a time in which you

were cold? What made the difference?59. What factors in your life made you open or receptive to God and how would you

describe your heart at that time?

J. Attachment: Small Group Convenant Printable Sheet


Small Group CovenantAll Christian small groups should develop a clear sense of purpose. Group members should understand this purpose and voluntarily promise to work toward achieving it. This promise is sometimes called a covenant. Forming a covenant makes it clear that each individual is important to the group. It clarifies the expectations and clears the way for deep love and commitment to occur. It is imperative for the survival and progress of a group.

1. Affirmation: There is nothing you have done or will do that will make me stop loving you. I may not agree with your actions, but I will love you unconditionally.

2. Confidentiality: What is said here stays here! An open atmosphere flourishes when others are trustworthy. I will never repeat what another has said unless given specific permission.

3. Openness: I will strive to reveal who I am-my hopes, hurts, backgrounds, joys, and struggles-as well as I am able.

4. Sensitivity: I will try to put myself in your shoes and understand what it is like to be you. I will try to hear you, see you, and feel where you are, to draw you out of the pit of discouragement or withdrawal. But I recognize that you have the individual right to remain silent.

5. Accountability: I am responsible for my own growth. I will not blame others for my feelings. None of us are trapped into behaviors that are unchangeable. I am accountable to myself, others, and God to become what God has designed me to be in His loving creation. I will help you become what you can be.

Questions: Which of these principles is especially important to you and why? Are you willing to abide by them?


Documents

small group proposal · Web viewElements of a Small Group 5 B. Covenanting in a Small Group (for first meeting) 5 C. How to Lead Sharing Time 6 Levels of Sharing/Followup Questions6