Improving your Persuasion and Influencing Skills for

better negotiated outcomes

Presented by Katrena Friel

March 2009

Influence and Communication

Influence is more than communication.

Communication moves information.

Influence moves your ideas into action.

Call to action

Something you can observe

Influence and Power

Power is a set of resources that you have.

Use direct power for emergencies or when you need

compliance rather than commitment.

Influence is a set of skills or actions that put your

power to work. Others feel influenced when they are

treated with respect and offered a choice.

Manipulation

Manipulation is not creating a relationship and may

not be repeatable.

Influence is About Relationship

Influence is not a contest. It is a two way process that

involves relationship.

Every time you influence someone you are making it

either easier or harder to influence him or her the next

time.

Influencing Challenges

What actions do you need to influence others to

take?

What are your greatest challenges in influencing?

Identify 2 or 3 upcoming opportunities to influence

someone to support your initiatives.

Expressive and Receptive Influence Actions

Timing is not always right

Influence Framework

Relationship

Needs to be built over time.

If you don’t have a good working relationship established use someone else that does have the relationship.

Consider the:

PAST

PRESENT

FUTURE

Context

What influences are going on?

e.g. global recession

Consider contextual issues

Could be the perfect time or not.

Approach

Is the HOW?

Tactics

Behaviours

Results

What do you want to achieve?

Be specific

Have an influence goal

An end in mind

Expressive Influence Behaviours

TELLCommunicate the desired action

Suggest

I suggest (propose, recommend etc.) that….

What if we……..

Here’s an idea………

Express needs

It’s important to me that…….

Here’s what I would like…….

I need…….

SELLConvince the other to commit to action

Offer reasons

The reasons are……

Here’s why…..

My analysis shows…..

Refer to shared values/goals

You and I are both concerned about…

This could help us achieve……

We both believe in……

NEGOTIATEGive the other a vested interest in action

Offer incentives

If you will do this, I will…..

In exchange, I will……

Here’s my offer…..

Describe consequences

I need to let you know the consequences of…

If you don’t (won’t, can’t), I’ll need to……

Here’s what we face if……

ENLISTCreate enthusiasm and alignment

Envision

Here’s what I believe could happen…..

Picture this……

I can see us……

Encourage

I know you can do this – remember when you…

I know that you are capable of…..

I believe that as a team……

Receptive Influence Behaviours

INQUIREGet information or involvement; guide thinking

Ask open-ended questions

What do you think about…?

How do you think we could…?

What concerns you about….?

Draw out

Tell me more about……

Help me understand…..

How do you see that working?

• Who

• What

• Why

• When

• Where

• How

LISTENLearn real limits or expand other’s thinking

Check understanding

So you think (hope, feel, believe, etc)…..

You’re saying that…..

So, from your point of view……

Test implications

I’m wondering if you might be concerned about…

If you do X, you are concerned about Y. Is that right?

ATTUNEBuild trust or increase openness

Identify with other

I feel (have felt) exactly the same way when….

If I were you, I might be feeling (thinking etc.)…

Disclose

I could really use your help on……

You’re right. I should have…..

I’m certain about…..

FACILITATEGet other to take responsibility for action

Clarify issues

So your dilemma (bind, concern, etc.) is….

On the one hand you……and on the other…..

Pose challenging questions

What options have you considered for…?

What would it take for you to…?

What action could you take to…?

The Magic of Influence

The magic of influence happens when you combine

them together.

Key Idea

Influence happens in the mind of the other person.

Regardless of your intention, if the other’s mind

doesn’t move, influence has not occurred

Key Idea

Keep a good balance between expressing your ideas

and soliciting the ideas and concerns of the other.

Key Idea

If you want to influence someone, never do anything

that makes him or her look or feel bad, wrong, or

stupid.

Effective Influence Requires Versatility...

Exercising Influence Instrument

Self-Assessment

Exercising Influence Instrument — Results