‘Skill Focus: Developing Personal Resilience’Kiki Maurey, Executive Coach & SpeakerDirector, Kiki Maurey Consultancy Ltd

resilience is vital: handling change

Getting honest feedback

Maintaining relationships & support

Sustaining ourselves

Meanings & accomplishments

resilience is vital: managing performance

HOLY GRAIL

The ability to…

1. cope with pressure and stress2. manage one’s emotions (but not

suppress them)3. develop mental toughness

or‘hardiness - despite challenging circumstances

4. maintain perspective and ‘bounce back’ from adversity

… but 1st, what is‘resilience’?

9 beliefs and qualities of resilient people

1. grounded in reality and can consciously keep a sense of proportion

2. a belief in a higher purpose to what they do

3. have a vision for the future

4. set milestones and goals for their career trajectory

5. have a clear understanding of their values and strengths

6. disciplined: find the space to think creatively (problem-solving) & apply it effectively

7. learn positively from their own, and others’ failures

8. understand that the quality of their thoughts leads to how they feel

9. believe in their innate ability to adapt and improve

… pressure or stress

• as pressure on us increases, we enter ‘peak performance’

• pressure helps us focus on the task and perform well

• TASK: balancing PP pressure, and disruptive levels of stress?

we can’t always control events, but we can learn we have a choice

over how we react

… who’s in charge?

the stress cycle

What are you noticing?How to

‘reset’?

4. Physical symptoms

3. Behaviours 2. Moods/Feelings

1. Thoughts

… reflections

1. Do you feel genuinely connected to who you really are at work?

2. Do you recognise the value of self-awareness and reflection?

3. Are you disciplined about how you look after yourself?

4. Are you able to build empathy and reciprocity in your

professional relationships?

5. What about the level of support you get, and also what you

offer others?

… the ‘secret’

It’s the HEART stupid!

Very strong relationship between heart

rates, brain-heart messaging and peak

performance

… at ‘the HEART’ of resilience

High heart rate / challenge

Low heart rate / relaxation

Resilience/S

uccess/W

ellbeing

Str

ess/

Sub

mis

sion

/Des

pair

DynamicPassionate

Engaged

Loss of interestCynicalDepressed

FrustratedAngryPanicked

Cool under pressureIn ‘the flow’

Contented

[HeartMath and The Authentic Organisation]

Hig

h P

erform

ance

Lo

w P

erfo

rman

ce

2.

1.

4.

3.

… the ‘secret heart’

• the heart has its own complex nervous system – the ‘Heart Brain’

• the heart sends far more information to the brain than vice versa

• the heart signals especially affect the brain centres involved in decision-making, creativity and emotional experience etc

• extensive magnetic force around the heart

Source: HeartMath and the Authentic Organisation

• keeping heart, mind and emotions in-sync and balanced

• enabling the immune, hormonal and nervous systems to function in a state of coordination

• COHERENCE is being…

• energetically centered

• able to increase mental and emotional flexibility

• able to increase your capacity to be in charge of yourself

Source: HeartMath and the Authentic Organisation

… the ‘secret heart’

… sometimes things just don’t work out

…coping takes commitment

Be honest, are you a “frustration junky”?

message to the brain:

“Switch off executive centre, revert to primitive brain… freeze, flight, or fight”

…coping takes commitment

How about becoming an “appreciation junky”?

message to the brain:

“Everything’s fine, there’s no threat just engage with the experience and enjoy… be at my best”

the message: ‘this too will pass’• recognise the pattern, and take steps to disengage

• breathe through your heart, 7:11, relax your body

• invoke a positive feeling / focus on things and people you love

• ask yourself ‘is there another way of looking at things?’

• smile, hugs, empathy, love, send blessings, and give thanks

• note the change in perspective, and write down your small victories

your resilience self-assessment

1. I am grounded in reality and can consciously keep a sense of proportion

2. I believe there is a higher purpose to what I do

3. I have a vision for the future

4. I set milestones and goals and can feel my trajectory

5. I have a clear understanding of my values and strengths

6. I find the space to think creativity (problem-solving) and to apply it effectively

7. I learn positively from mine and others’ failures

8. I understand that the quality of my thoughts leads to how I feel

9. I believe in my inbuilt ability to adapt and improve

we can’t always control events, but we can learn we have a choice

over how we react

… who’s in charge?

resilience is vital: your approach is up to you