SISTER ACT: TRAINING TO FACILITATE

SIBLING SURROGACY

August 2014

• Elijah - 24 years old

– Breast cancer

• Eve - 24 years old

– Pregnant

– C-section with 1st offspring

• Acara - 9 years old

– Hand raised 9 months

September 2014

• Elijah-Breast cancer in lymph nodes, lethargic

• Workup within

48 hours

• Large mass in throat

• Unable to maintain airway

Acting Out

• Acara went through a long grieving process

• Fiesty, unpredictable

• Fighting with Eve

Fighting With Eve

Eve’s Pregnancy

• Eve difficult pregnancy

• Constipated, decreased appetite

• Maintained or gained weight

• Not comfortable

• Ultrasounds, urine collection

weights

Roller Coaster

• Tuah was born via C-section November 4

• 24/7 hand raising

• Eve passed away November 30, after intensive treatment

• Systemic infection, multitude of issues, adhesions throughout abdominal cavity

Changing Gears

• 9 year old Acara and new born Tuah remain

• Acara’s emotional needs

• Keeper’s emotional needs

Soaking It Up

• Aware of our behavior

• Allowing hair pulling, fussing, grabbing and biting

• Maternal behaviors

• Cork it

• Fix your hair!

• Where is your…?

• Show me something new

Get Your Baby

Stuffy!

• Get your baby

• Hold on

• Bottle

• Gentle

• Leave it

• Getting bored

Delay

• Everybody needs to be ready

• Risk involved

• Planned for detours

Intros

• Started at 2.5 months

• Initially hours

• Baby dangling

• Not always ideal/perfect

• Worked through issues

• Remained fluid

Day 2, 3, 4…

Go The F*** To Sleep!

• Struggled at nap time

• Needed her to lay down

• Needed caregivers to

move around

• Treats lost value

• Inventive – grains of rice, pomegranate seeds,

caps of juice poured down celery

• Captured “hook him”

• Acara feedback

• Tuah feedback

• Challenge of constant change

• Goal board-small steps

Get Your Real Baby

24/7 @ 4 Months

• Exhausting for all

• Behavior modification

Nap Time

Outside

Q & A