Sibshops

Workshops for Siblings of Children with Special Needs

Lucy Bennett

Definitions of terms

• Siblings – brothers and sisters• Special needs – includes intellectual

disabilities, physical disabilities, sensory disabilities (blindness, deafness), autism…..

• Sibshops – workshops designed specifically for children, aged 7-14, who are growing up with a brother or sister with special needs

Overview of Presentation

• Literature review on the experience of siblings- positives and negatives

• Description of Sibshops

• Kilkenny Sibshops : Sample activities – opportunity for participation!

• Feedback from siblings and parents

• Conclusion

Review of Literature

• Sibling relationships can last a lifetime.• They have a significant effect on personality

development (Strohm, 2002). • They provide opportunities to develop identity, to

practice conflict resolution and to openly express a range of emotions, including love, anger, rivalry and loyalty.

• When one sibling has a disability, the relationship between siblings can be significantly changed (Strohm, 2002 and Trachtenberg and Batshaw,1997) .

Positive Aspects of being a Sibling of a Child with Special Needs

• Increased sensitivity, increased closeness and support within families (Taunt and Hasting 2002).

• Increased compassion, appreciation of their own health, more acceptance of difference, awareness of the consequences of prejudice and a deeper knowledge of disabilities (Eisenberg and Baker, 1998).

• A sense of responsibility beyond their chronological age (Dale, 1996; Seligman and Darling, 1997).

• Many siblings choose a career in the caring professions (Marks et al, 2005).

Challenging Aspects of being a Sibling

• Lack of time and attention from parents (Ives and Munro 2002).

• Need for information (Osman, 2001)

• Greater responsibility (Seligman and Darling, 1997)

• Isolation

• Fear for the future- Lack of care planning (Egan and Walsh, 2001)

What are Sibshops?

• Sibshops are ‘events’ which provide ‘opportunities for brothers and sisters of children with special needs to obtain peer support and education within a recreational context’ (Meyer and Vadasy, 2007:1).

• The Sibshop model uses a group work approach. It acknowledges that most brothers and sisters are doing well, despite the challenges they face in having a child with a disability in their family (Meyer and Vadasy,2007) .

• Sibshops are not therapy groups

• Children do not need to be presenting with ‘issues’ in order to attend.

• The emphasis is on meeting other siblings and on having fun.

Aims of Sibshops

• To meet other siblings in a relaxed, recreational setting

• To discuss common joys and concerns • To learn how others handle difficult situations• To learn more about their brother’s or sister’s

conditions (Meyer and Vadasy,2007).• To make parents and other professionals more

aware of the concerns frequently experienced by siblings.

Kilkenny Sibshops

• Between Mar ’06 and April ’06, twelve siblings aged between 7-14 years attended a series of five workshops in Kilkenny.

• During May and June ’06, another twelve siblings, aged between 9 – 12 years, attended a further series of workshops.

• Three facilitators ran the workshops, two of whom are siblings of adults with special needs.

Sample Sibshop

• Visual schedules

• ‘Trickle in’ activities

• Introductions

• Knots

• Information-Giving Activities – Difficult to source child-friendly material. Visits by therapists, booklets distributed, excerpts from videos watched…

Sample Sibshop cont.

• Party Games: After each sit-down activity, there was usually a more high energy activity.

• We purposely tried to play games which did not depend on sporting ability.

• We also tried to include games that the siblings could play at home with their brothers or sisters with special needs.

Cont.

• Strengths and Weaknesses Exercise (see worksheet) or

• Sightless Sculptor

• Break – time to socialise informally

• Dealing with Difficult Situations – Aunty Blabby letters, Story telling and writing, Sound Off (see worksheet), Walking in my sister’s footsteps…

Aunty Blabby

• ‘Dear Aunt Blabby,• I am beginning to feel like Cinderella. My

parents make me take care of my little sister who has Downs Syndrome. I never get to go out with my friends. What can I do?

• Response: “Dear Cinderella,• You should talk to your parents and tell

them how you are feeling. They might not have noticed you are feeling this way.’

Story telling

• ‘My sister is eight and has autism. Most of the time I like her but sometimes I don’t, like she never plays with me and is always grumpy. Whenever we go on holidays we have to do what she wants. She always gets her own way. It’s not fair! But I like giving her hugs.’

Children’s Opinions on Sibshops

• What they liked most….’all of it’, ‘the games’, ‘chain tig’, ‘meeting others’, ‘sweets’, ‘break time’, ‘indoor soccer’, ‘gym mats’, ‘the parachute’.

• When asked what they liked least ‘nothing’, ‘talking’, ‘I wish there were more weeks’.

How Sibshops helped

• ‘It was a help to talk about it and it was great to meet others with a brother/sister with special needs’

• ‘I can tell people about her’• ‘Knowing what to do’• ‘Helped to learn about other types of disabilities’• ‘I learned more about my brother’• ‘I know I am not alone’• ‘Got me away from my brother and sister’

Contact with parents

• Parents received an information leaflet and completed an application form for each child.

• Siblings were encouraged to talk to their parents when they went home and to ask them questions .

• All family members were invited to the last session.

Feedback from Parents

• All the children spoke to their parents about what happened at Sibshops.

• Their children enjoyed the Sibshops and they always (after the first night) wanted to attend.

• Their children enjoyed the games most

• They did not appear upset after any of the sessions

Parents’ feedback cont.

• ’Both appear to be volunteering more to play with their sister’, ‘I notice she is more gentle with her brother’…’ ‘He realises that there are other children with a brother and sister with a disability experiencing the same feelings and frustrations’,…. ‘She learned that she is not the only little girl with a brother or sister that is special’…’,’He has made friends with other sibs’…

Conclusion

• The Sibshop approach provides a tried and tested model for working with siblings

• I would encourage people in the caring professions to consider the needs of siblings when working with families.

• Participating in Sibshops in Kilkenny was definitely a very worthwhile and enjoyable experience for the children, for their families and for the facilitators.

Bibliography

• Dale, N. (1996) Working With Families of Children with Special Needs. Partnership and Practice, Routledge: London

• Eisenberg, L. and Baker, B.L. (1998) “Siblings of Children with Mental Retardation Living at Home or in Residential Placement”, Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 39 (30), 355-363.

• Egan, J. and Walsh, P. (2001) “Sources of stress among adult siblings of Irish people with intellectual disability” The Irish Journal of Psychology 22(1), pp 28-38

• Ives, M. and Munro, N. (2002) Caring For A Child With Autism, Jessica Kingsley Publishers: United Kingdom

Bibliography cont.

• Marks, S. U., Matson, A. and Barraza, L. (2005) “The Impact of Siblings with Disabilities on their Brothers and Sisters Pursuing a Career in Special Education, Research and Practice for Persons with Severe Disabilities, 30 (4), 205-218.

• Meyer, D. and Vadasy, P. (2007). Sibshops: Workshops for siblings of children with special needs, Paul H. Brookes Publishing: U.S.A

• Meyer, D. (ed) (1997) Views from our Shoes, Paul H. Brookes Publishing: U.S.A

• Osman, B. (2001) How Learning Disabilities Affect a Child’s Siblings, GreatSchools Inc: U.S.A. [retrieved 24th November 2008 from www.greatschools.net/cgi-bin/showarticle2334

Bibliography cont.

• Seligman, M. and Darling, R.B. (1997) Ordinary Families, Special Children. A Systems Approach to Childhood Disability Second Edition, The Guilford Press: New York

• Strohm, K. (2002) Siblings: Brothers and Sisters of Children with Special Needs, Wakefield Press: AdelaideTaunt, H.M. and Hastings, R.P., (2002) “Positive Impact of children with Developmental Disabilities on their Families: A Preliminary Study”, Education and Training in Mental Retardation and Developmental Disabilities, 37 (4), 410-420.

• Trachtenberg, S.W. and Batshaw, M.L. (1997) “Caring And Coping. The Family of a Child with Disabilities” in Batshaw, M.L. (eds) Children With Disabilities Fourth Edition, Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co: U.S.A.