1. Run over by a police car, decapitated, hit by train, knifed, freezes to death, squashed by tree, squished by tombstone~ touched by Death himself, trampled to death, head explodes in planetarium, eaten by Ozzy Osborne. All of these, FTP, are related in what way?

A: Ways Kenny has died (Accept similar)

2. California, Al Gore, Tabloids, Punk Rockers, The Hour of Slack, Big Media, Tax Reform, New York, CIA, IRS, Rewriting History, Japan, Necronomicon, Gnomes of Zurich, and of course the Good Sex For Mutants Dating League all come from what collectible card game.

A: Illuminati New World Order - -

3. If you won, you usually got a trip to Space Camp or Disney World. Most teams weren't able to do so~ because of the time constraint and the requirement for frantic physical activity. In the early 1990's, adults could participate for the first time. A reluctance to get dirty was a huge hindrance in this game, since almost every physical challenge involved some amount of food and! or sloppy goo. FTP, name this game show which involved the tactic of 'daring' .

A: bouble Dare

4. Originally he was a used car dealer. Therefore, creating a terrorist organization was a step up for him. He took over a town named Springfield at onepoint,and his own son, Billy, tried to assassinate him. In the movie, he was exposed to spores that changed him into a reptillian creature. FTP, name this enemy ofGI Joe, the leader of Cobra.

A: Cobra Commander

5. Some of the other nominees in its category were Pigs in a Polka, Blitz Wolf, All out for V and Juke Box Jamboree. Since it was 1943, the fact that this cartoon had a war theme probably helped it win. A Disney cartoon, it was also known as Donald Duck in Nutziland. In it, Donald struggles to make do with disgusting Nazi food rations and a day of toil alan artillery factory. He has a nervous breakdown, and awakens to find that his experience was a nightmare. FTP,name this Disney cartoon, winner of the 1943 Academy Award for best cartoon, which has been banned from reissue in the US by Disney.

A: Der Fuehrer's Face

6. The train was never seen again, the ship went down under a heavy gale with no survivors, the balloon remained in outer space, a posse was formed and ran him out of

time, a cyclone destroyed the town, he got dropped in a hamburger hopper, Sidneytown floated out to the bay, an H-Bomb destroyed civilization, but what, FTP still happened?

A: The _CAT CAME BACK_the Very Next Day

7. There are two countries, divided along a straight border> Both countries send raiders into the other country to attempt to reach a token and return the token to their home territory. If the raiders are caught, they are incarcerated in the enemy country until some of their comrades can free them. The battle ends when one team is able to return the token to their home country before the other team can. FTP, name this game where the token is usually a flag.

8. The village is surrounded by fortified Roman camps. However, the inhabitants repeatedly go on adventures throughout the countryside and visit several other countries including Britain, Spain, Switzerland, Corsica, and Belgium. With the help ofGetafix's magic potion; the main character and his friend Obelix always teach the Romans a lesson. FTP, mime this main character.

A: ASTERIX the Gaul

9. Harvard Alumni pay to make sure that ice cream is served with every meal, Princeton students rioted in celebration of the solving of Fermat's Last Theorem, there is a policy of when it is OK to leave the class if a professor is late that depends on the seniority of the professor, professor gives "announced quiz" to surprised class by placing ad in newspaper, and you automatically get an A if your roommate commits suicide are all college versions of this genre of modem folktale.

A: _URBAN LEGENDS_ (accept equiv.)

10. This cOlIlpany advertised heavily in comic books, both Marvel and DC during the 70s. Generally, the hero was engaged in a fight that they were losing, until they gave this product to the villain. At that point, the villain started eating the pastry product, and the hero was able to triumph. FTP, name this company, with the Twinkies, Fruit Pies and Devil's Food CupCakes that let truth, justice and the American Way triumph.

A: Hostess

11. Several Presidents have died during office, but some have died under stranger circumstances than others. Recent evidence has shown that this President, a known adulterer, may have been poisoned during his term of office, leading to his death from a heart attack in San Francisco. The most interesting part of this is that some of the

evidence is from Florence's, his wife's, diary, which was remarkably prescient concerning his death. FTP, name this President, the 29th of the United States.

A: Warren HARDING - -

12. It's time for the obligatory Army of Darkness Tossup. Oh shit .... well, that's ruined now. Dmm ... just ring in and say Army of Darkness and let's move on. Let's never speak of it again.

A: _Army of Darkness_

13. The National Security Agency has banned this toy from its premises for fear that it could pose a threat to confidential conversations. There have also been reports that Hasbro has made a payment to Warner Brothers because of this toy's similarity to Gizmo from Gremlins. They were the hottest toy in America this Christmas, so FTP, name this doll which <learns' English and can repeat your words back to you.

A: Furby

14. The Foundation for Law and Government started everything by giving the protagonist a new face and identity after he was shot in the face by his partner. Peter Parros played Reginald Cornelius III, RC3, on the show and Bonnie was played by Patricia McPherson. Garth Knight is one of the villains, but the real star of the show has to be the Knight Industries Two Thousand that Michael drives in. FTP, name this show.

A: Knight Rider

15. This Simp sons character has apparently been killed, or at least has been in situations in which most people would have died, four times. He has been hit by a football in the groin in a video. He has been forced off the road by Otto because he was driving a Gremlin. He apparently has a radio talk show in which he has told people about the pain in which he lives his life. Once, he was brainwashed into believing that he was Bart. FTP, give the name of this nearsighted man with thick glasses who feels like a peanut.

A: Hans Moleman

16. The Tiger Tops Tuskers were the dominant team for most of the eighties, but there is no dominant team in the 1990's. From 1990 to 1996, the Nepal National Park team has won three times, while the Tiger Tops have only won in 1992. There are very few teams in this sport, partially because the mounts are very hard to get. The usual polo rules seem to apply, but there have to be some additions al?out not letting the mounts lie down in front of the goal, thus preventing anyone from getting a shot. FTP, name this event, dominated by Nepal and India.

A: Elephant Polo

17. He was a mild-mannered janitor at the police station working with Rosemary, tqe switchboard operator and the gruff Sgt. Flint. He is taking a Kung Fu Correspondence Course and gets a little support from his cat, Spot. Whenever a crime is being committed, he jumps into the dumpster to get into the shape-changing vehicle he has hidden there and goes off to be, FTP, what superhero with a super karate chop>

_Hong Kong Phooey_

18. This form appears appears on the computer screen during the Matrix, but is never used by Keanu Reeves or Lawrence Fishburne. This may be because the chaotic movements and staggering that this form requires probably could not be easily made faster or more fluid. This form emulates the external motions of a drunkard, but provides a sense of agility and fluidity, rather than clumsiness. FTP, name this style which many of you may have seen in Drunken Master.

_Drunken Boxing_ (Drunken Fist also Acceptable)

19. He first produced in 1916 with the Vagabond. He had directed Twenty Minutes of Love in 1914, which he also starred in. He was knighted in 1975, an occurance that probably would not have happened to most of the characters he played. He was called before the House Un American Activities committee three times, but he never went, and it was determined that it was not necessary that he go. FTP, name this actor who starred in such films as Gold Rush, The Kid, and The Great Dictator.

A: Charlie CHAPLIN - -

20. He has his own show in Detroit and owns a very large ranch. An avid bow hunter and member ofthe NRA Board of Directors, he is a popular guest on many talk shows. Despite all of this, he is probably best known for his guitar showmanship and the fact that he's sold over 30 million records. FTP, name this guitar virtuoso who "killed all the animals".

A: Ted NUGENT

2l. It recently started service out ofIslip, Long Island. Traditionally a short haul airline, it ignores the idea of hubs and just goes from point to point, wherever it can make a profit. There is no assigned seating on this carrier and the CEO works as a flight attendant for a few trips every year. The wet T-shirt contests have stopped, but the peanut bag throwing contests and the rapping of the safety instructions continue. FTP, name this airline that gets its name from the geographical region it mainly serves.

A: Southwest Airlines

22. Someday you'll find her, Life is a Circus, Be my Valentine, You're in the Superb owl, Hei's your dog, It's flashbeagle, Bon Voyage, and Race for Your Life are all missing, FTP the name of what Peanuts character.

A: Charlie Brown

BONI

1. SPORTS OFFICIALS SIGNALLING BONUS! For the stated number of points, perform the given motion performed by various sports officials.

For 5- Home run in baseball

A: point index finger in air, and rotate it

For 10- 6-point goal in Australian Rules Football

A: two index fingers extended at waist level

For 15- the following football play: Offense's ball on the 20. 1 second before the snap, a linebacker (who had previously been disqualified from the game) runs across the line of scrimmage on a blitz. He is also the 12th defensive player on the field. However, the quarterback manages to get off a throw before he is even touched, to his wide receiver, who fumbles it just 5 yards later. Thinking quickly, he kicks the bouncing ball to his center, who runs 74 yards before collapsing on the 1. The offensive tackle picks up his teammate, and heaves him across the goal line.

A: the answer is "dead ball" so a single arm must be raised in the air with palm extended

2. In the grand Lemur Bowl tradition of taste and decorum, we are proud to present the My Little Pony, Porn Star, Both or Neither. Identify the following as My Little Pony characters, Porn Stars, both or neither. Five points each.

1. Cherry Treats

A: _MY LITTLE PONY_

2. Honey Rose

A: PORN STAR - -

3. Little Orchid

A: NEITHER - -

4. Sweetie Pie

A: YORN STAR _ (appeared in Breastman's American Butt Search)

5. Daisy Sweet

A: MY LITTLE PONY - -

6. Ruby Lips

A: BOTH - -

3. It's time to revive another great Lemur Bowl tradition. Given a country, identify it as monarchy, penis-shaped, both, or neither. 10 points each.

1. Tonga

A: MONARCHY - -

2. Norway

A: Both

3. Togo

A: PENIS-SHAPED

4. Well, the much-vaunted quarterback class of 1999 has drawn comparisons with the legendary class of 1983. Answer these questions about the class of '83 for the stated number of points.

1. First, for 10 points, all or nothing, name the 6 members of the class of '83. A: Dan Marino, John Elway, Todd Blackledge, Tony Eason, Ken O'Brien, Jim Kelly.

2. Second for 5 points, Which of the 6 was drafted last. A: Dan Marino

3. Finally, for 15 points, The 1971 draft also saw a QB frenzy, with quaterbacks taken with the first 3 picks. Name them

A: Jim Plunkett, Archie Manning, Dan Pastorini

5.Few authors have seen as much of their wprk on the silver screen as John Irving. Given a list of stars, name the book (liot necessarily the same as the movie)from which the sceen adaptation is taken. 10 pts. each.

1. Ian Michael Smith, Ashley Judd, Oliver Platt A: A Prayer for Owen Meany

2, Robin Williams, Glenn Close, John Lithgow A: The World According to Garp

3. Rob Lowe, Jodie Foster, Matthew Modine A: The Hotel New Hampshire

6. Perhaps the greatest scandal in pro sports history was the 1919 Black Sox scandal, which resulted in 8 members of the White Sox being banned from baseball for life. One, of course, was Shoeless Joe. Name any 6 of the other 7 for 5 points per correct answer.

A: Eddie Cicotte, Claude "Lefty" Williams, Hap Felsch, Swede Risberg, Buck Weaver, Chick Gandil, and Fred McMullin

7. Everybody loves Raymond, but everybody would hate a bonus about him. So instead here's some Simpsons/Futurama stuff. For five points, sing the song the audioaudimantronic dolls perform in the Duff Gardens ride.

ANSWER: DOFF BEER FOR ME DUFF BEER FOR YOU I'LL HAVE A DUFF YOU HAVE ONE TOO (repeat)

Now, for 25 points, sing the song from the "Whalers on the Sea of Tranquility" ride in Futuntma:

Answer: WE'RE WHALERS ON THE MOON

WE CARRY A HARPOON BUT THERE AINT NO WHALES SO WE TELL TALL TALES AND SING A WHALING TUNE

8. The Onion frequently features none-too-helpful advice columns, in which the columnist has other things on their mind than answering questions (for instance, Ask A Gut~shot Policeman). For ten points each,

we'll give you part of a letter and the columnist's answer, you tell us the title of the column.

1. I know unemployment has undermined his confidence, but I'm not his mother! How do I get him out of the house and looking for work? --Peeved In Palmyra

Dear Peeved, Killing silently is a tall order, but a quick look at an anatomy chart will show that the larynx is an easy enough target:--providing you can make a stealthy submerged approach, sneak up on your victim, and catch him unaware. answer: ASK A NAVY SEAL

2. Not to mention that ifI did meet someone, I can't imagine bringing him home to meet the kids. Any suggestions? --Ready In Raleigh

Dear Ready, Ooh-hoo! I know what I'll do! I'll hide a big stick of dynamite in the cheese!

ANSWER: ASK A _HUMOROUS CARTOON CAT_

3. If you ask me, your response to "Torn In Tuscaloosa" was way off the mark. If her boyfriend doesn't want to get off the couch and start working for a living, he's nothing but a no-good, selfish moocher. Thatgirl should drop him like a hot potato! --Peeved In Peekskill

Dear Peeved, Who's afraid of my big bad weenie / Rub it and see if it's got a genie / Gonna make disappear this 10-inch zucchini / Just like Houdini

ANSWER: ASK SIR MIX-A-LOT - -

9. Readers of Max Cannon's Red Meat know very little about Bug Eyed Earl's private life, or even what he looks like from the waist down--he pretty much just stands there. But we do know what he says, so for fifteen points each, finish these quotes.

1. I had to move to a new apartment recently. The old place was getting a little too small for me and my cat.

ANSWER: _YOU'D BE SURPRISED HOW MUCH SPACE IT TAKES FOR A CHEETAH TO RIDE A DIRT BIKE_ (accept reasonable paraphrases)

2. My cat died a couple days ago from chewin' on an electrical cord. Kind of a stupid thing to do ...

ANSWER: CONSIDERIN' AS IT WAS THE ONLY THING HOLDING HER ON TO THAT HELICOPTER BLADE _ (accept reasonable paraphrases)

10. Identify the novel, 30-20-10

30- A minor character, Orin, is a punter for the arizona cardinals.

20- The other characters, Hal and Mario Incandenza, attend Enfield Tennis Acadamy, outside of Boston near a rehab house David Gately runs.

10- This immensely large and immensely well-footnoted novel is by David Foster Wallace and takes its title from Hamlet . - -

A- INFINITE JEST

11. We'll give you a fragment from an R. E. M. song, you identify the song for ten points each.

1. Speak out sometimes but try to win. A- PERFECTCIRCLE - -

2. I know the mortar in the wall. breaks I recognize the weapons, I used them well

A- WORLD LEADER PRETEND

3. tough spun. hard won. no ocean flower aquarium A-_LOTUS

12. Identify the actor, 30-20-10.

30- He played cops in both "Flight of the Intruder" and "Wolf"

20- Homer Simpson has this to say about him, "He is handsome, in an ugly sort of way. "

10- He's best known for his role in "Friends," where he plays Ross Geller.

A- David Schwimmer.

13. Identify the journalist, 30-20-10

30-His grandfather founded the newpaper he writes for, using the only two words he knew in english to name it.

20-Recent adventures have revealed his archen~y Black Scarlett to be none other than Freddie Mercury of Queen, who apparently faked his death to execute a vendetta against him.

10- This publisher of the Onion is frequently mistaken for a decomposing corpse, yet finds time between enemas to write "A Note from the Publisher" every week.

A. T. Herman ZweibeL

14. We'll give you album titles, you give us the band for ten points each.

1. Surfer Rosa, Bossanova A- THE PIXIES 2. Regretfully Yours, Head Trip In Every Key A- SUPERDRAG - -3. The Return of Bruno A- BRUCE WILLIS

15. Baseball and movies two good things that go good together. Hell, the combination even makes Kevin Costner look good. Identify these baseball movies, 10 points each.

1. Based on a Mark Hanna novella, it stars Robert DeNiro as a dying catcher and Michael Moriarty as the team's star pitcher and DeNiro's best friend,

A: Bang the Drum Slowly

2. This movie stars Edward James Olmos as a scout who finally digs up the one true phenom after years of trap sing through the bushes, and shepards his youthful charge into the majors as a California Angel

A: Talent for the Game

3. William Murphy stars as a chemist tryingto keep bugs off trees. Be accidentally discovers a way to make baseballs repel wood becoming an unhittable pitcher in the process and leading the Cardinals to the pennant. Name it.

A: It Happens Every Spripg

16: Identify the following video games based on the Star Wars Universe for the stated number of points.

5- This ultra-popular flight game for Super Nintendo and PC lets you take Luke Skywalker's role in a series of in-atmosphere combat scenarios.

A-STAR WARS: _ROGUE SQUADRON_

10- This slightly older game was the s~quel to perennial favorite _Dark Forces_; you continue Kyle Katarn's adventures as he trains to become a jedi. The add-on missions were called "Mysteries of the Sith."

A-STAR WARS JEDI KNIGHT DARK FORCES II

15- This just-released title puts you flying missions to prevent a rival family from encroaching on your family'S business; for a finale, you get to fly the Millenium Falcon into the second Death Star.

A-STAR WARS _X-WING ALLIANCE_

17. Identify the television show from quotes, 30-20-10.

30: "Are you butt-ugly with nasty ass taste? Then come on down to Betty's no good clothes shop and pancake house!" 20: "I don't like the term 'research'; I find it too restrictive. I feel I've Qpened up a whole new field of study which I like to call. .. monkey torture. " 10: 240 dollars worth of pudding.

A THESTATE - -

18. Given a brand of beer, tell me its country of origin, 10 points each.

1. Spaten A: Germany

2. Plisner Urquel A: Czech Republic

3. He-Brew A: United States

19. WRESTLING MOVES CHALLENGE! We know you all really want to be professional wrestlers like Jesse the Mind. Show off your skill performing the given moves for ten points each. One team member must do the move on another team member. If it is a one man team, skip to another bonus.

1. Full Nelson

A: One team member stands behind another and puts arms under armpits, below shoulders. The arms are then pulled up behind the team members neck and held together.

2. HammerLock

A: One player pulls a teammates arm behind his back and pulls arm across the back.

3. Camel clutch

A: One player lays face down on the ground. The other sits on his/her back and then pull sup on his/her chin.

20. Identify the following movie from quotes, 30-20-10

30-Speaker 1: So what if we do develop this Solaranite bomb? We'd be even a stronger nation than now.

Speaker 2: "Stronger." You see? You see? Your stupid minds! Stupid! Stupid!

20-We are all interested in the future, for that is where you and I are going to spend the rest of our lives. And remember, my friends, future events such as these will affect you in the future.

lO-Now, don't you worry. The saucers are llP there. The graveyard is out there. But I'll be locked up safely in there.

A- PLAN 9 FROM OUTER SPACE