The Plague of Every Relationship ~ Genesis 3:1-15, 20July 26, 2015 ~ New City Church of Calgary ~ Pastor John Ferguson

Intro: In less than one month, Heather & I will be celebrating our 22nd anniversary. Weve been through a lot together, but were very thankful that we have made it for 22 years because there is a plague at work in our relationship that threatens to undo us day in and day out.

This plague is like an ever-present enemy waiting patiently for an opportune moment to ambush us. It lurks behind every conversation we have, every decision we make, and every intimate moment we share. If this plagues is not held in check, it will utterly destroy us and everything we hold dear.

Though we didnt know it then, even while we were standing at the alter and binding our lives together with covenant vows, the plague was waiting with baited breath for us to say, I do.

This plague isnt just a danger to us, but it is an every present danger to everyone in this room. Though you may be reluctant to admit it, this plague has already infected you and you carry it with you every where you go. It threatens to infect, contaminate, and destroy every relationship you hold dear, and every relationship you hope to have.

What is this plague, and is there any hope for mankind? Thats what were going to look at today.

Were going to listen in to the story that informed the identity of Jesus. Its a story set in an idyllic paradise with two lovers, and it tells us how it all went wrong. If were willing to enter into this story which claims to be the true story of the world and thus the story in which our personal stories make sense, then we will not only understand the plague that haunts humanity, but well be in a position to receive the cure that Jesus offers.

Context: Adam & Eve were created as the first husband and wife who were given the charge of being kingdom builders. They were to bring out all the hidden potential of this world as they went about the task of spreading Gods kingdom over the face of the earth. They were given the charge to be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth. Their base of operations was a little corner of paradise called the Garden of Eden, and its in this Garden where they were faced with a monumental decision. Genesis 3:1 Now the serpent was more crafty than any other beast of the field that the LORD God had made. He said to the woman, Did God actually say, You shall not eat of any tree in the garden? 2 And the woman said to the serpent, We may eat of the fruit of the trees in the garden, 3 but God said, You shall not eat of the fruit of the tree that is in the midst of the garden, neither shall you touch it, lest you die. 4 But the serpent said to the woman, You will not surely die. 5 For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.

Two dierent interpretations of reality; two dierent loyalties; two dierent kingdoms.

6 So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate, and she also gave some to her husband who was with her, and he ate.

Together, the first husband and wife took the plunge, and instead of centring their lives on God and loving him, they suppressed reality and stepped out of line with their design and did what was right in their own eyes.

7 Then the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked. And they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths.

Their eyes were opened to a world where everything is dierent. Strangers to God & themselves.

8 And they heard the sound of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God among the trees of the garden. 9 But the LORD God

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called to the man and said to him, Where are you? 10 And he said, I heard the sound of you in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked, and I hid myself.

1. Question #1: Where are you? This is an invitation to be found.

2. The presence of fear: I was afraid, because I was naked, and I hid myself.

A radical insecurity now dogs our steps all the days of our lives.

11 He said, Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten of the tree of which I commanded you not to eat?

Question #2: Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten of the tree? This was an opportunity to take responsibility, to confess their betrayal, to seek forgiveness. But now the power of the plague was in full eect.

12 The man said, The woman whom you gave to be with me, she gave me fruit of the tree, and I ate. 13 Then the LORD God said to the woman, What is this that you have done? The woman said, The serpent deceived me, and I ate.

1. Disordered loves

(1) Augustine / Luther: homo incurvatus in se: a human curved in on oneself / turned in toward oneself; it describes life lived in light of ones self interests instead of for God and others. This curve, this bent, this turning is what the Bible describes as sin; not just sin as an action, but sin as a disposition that holds sway over our lives.

(2) Stott, Like salvation, sin is a word that belongs to the traditional Christian vocabulary. I am not a sinner, people often say, because they seem to be associating sin with specific and rather sensational misdeeds like murder, adultery, and theft. But sin has a much wider connotation than that. What the Bible means by sin is primarily self-centredness. For Gods two great commandments are first that we love him with all our being and secondly that we love our neighbour as we love ourself. Sin, then, is the reversal of this order. It is to put ourselves firstour neighbour next when it suits our convenience, and God somewhere in the background.

(3) The Greek word agape means self-sacrifice in the service of others. By definition it is not directed towards oneself. But this is what we do. This plague of selfishness is our fundamental bent.

2 Tim 3:1, 4, people will be lovers of selfrather than lovers of God. We are natural born narcissists. We are addicted to ourselves. That is our plague. And it is epidemic.

2. Illustrations

(1) Music

Michael Jackson: I love the feelin youre givin me / Just hold me baby and Im in ecstasy / Oh, Ill be workin from 9-5 / to buy you things to keep you by my side / I never felt so in love before / just promise baby youll love me forevermore / I swear Ill keep you satisfied / cause youre the one for me / The way you make me feel / you really turn me on / you knock my off my feet now baby / my lonely days are gone.

JM Montgomery, I love the way you love me.

Whitney Houston, Everybodys searching for a hero / people need someone to look up to / I never found anyone who fulfilled my needs / a lonely place to be / And so I learned to depend on me // Because the greatest love of all is happening to me / I found the greatest love of all inside of me / the greatest love of all is easy to achieve / learning to love yourself it is the greatest love of all.

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I Cor 13:4-5, Loveis not self-seeking.

(2) Marriage. JKA Smith, Marriage for the Common Good, Indeed, the myths we load into weddings almost doom marriages to fail. Weddings are centered around the romantic coupling of two star-crossed lovers, as if marriage was an extended exercise of staring deep into one anothers eyeswith benefits. But even then, my spouse is one whoseesme, will meet my needs, will fulfill my wants, will complete me. Even our romantic coupling becomes a form of self-love.

(3) Friendships. Don Millers Blue Like Jazz: The most difficult lie I have ever contended with is this: Life is a story about me.

Living in community made me realize one of my faults: I was addicted to myself. All I thought about was myself. The only thing I cared about was myself.It's like in that movie About a Boy where Nick Hornby's chief character, played by Hugh Grant, believes that life is a play about himself, that all other characters are only acting minor roles in a story that centers around him. My life felt like that. Life was a story about me because I was in every scene. In fact, I was the only one in every scene. I was everywhere I went. If somebody walked into my scene, it would frustrate me because they were disrupting the general theme of the play, namely my comfort or glory. Other people were flat charact-ers in my movie, lifeless characters. Sometimes I would have scenes with them, dialogue, and they would speak their lines, and I would speak mine. But the movie, the grand movie stretching from Adam to the Antichrist, was about me. I wouldn't have told you that at the time, but that is the way I lived.

Main Idea: The plague of every relationship is the epidemic of self-centredness.

1. Receive the Diagnosis.

Question: Is it possible that you are more self-centred than you have the courage to admit? We are usually the last to see our self-absorption (HT: Keller).

(1) Rom. 3:23, All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.

Eccl. 9:3 NIV, the hearts of people, moreover, are full of evil and there is madness in their hearts while they live.

(2) Word of wisdom to those who aspire to marry: you will marry a self-centred sinner. Whats more, you are a self-centred sinner too! Dangerous combination.

(3) Tim Keller, Self-centerednessis the ever-present enemy of every marriage. It is the cancer in the centre of a marriage when it begins, and it has to be dealt with.

Gary & Betsy Ricucci, One of the best wedding gifts God gave you was a full-length mirror called your spouse. Had there been a card attached, it would have said, Heres to helping you discover what youre really like!

You are committing to be known in all your flaws, imperfections, and sinsin all your selfishness.

2. Seek the Great Physician.

(1) Mark 2:15-16, And as he reclined at table in his [Levis] house, many tax collectors and sinners were reclining with Jesus and his disciples for there were many who followed him. And the scribes of the Pharisees, when they saw that he was eating with tax collectors, said to his disciples, Why does he eat

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with tax collectors and sinners? And when Jesus heard it, he said to the, Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. I came not to call the righteous, but sinners.

(2) If you are infected with the plague of self-centredness, then you are Jesus kind of people!!!

3. Apply the Remedy of the Gospel.

(1) 2 Cor. 5:15, And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again.

(2) T. Keller, The Christian principle that needs to be at work is Spirit-generated selflessnessnot thinking less of yourself or more of yourself but thinking of yourself less.

(3) Colossians 3:13, as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive one another.

E.g., the recent shootings in Charleston, SC, in which victims families extended forgiveness.

Imagine a city in which people didnt think less of themselves, but just thought of themselves less. And imagine that was because people were thinking more about God and others. Imagine your work place, your neighbourhood, your family, in which people primary impulse was not to use others for their own gain, but to serve others for their gain.

And imagine a city in which people no longer lived for themselves but for the living God who made himself known in Jesusthe God who loved them, died for them, and was raised again.

Imagine how the power of the gospel working against the plague of selfishness in your lifehealing your marriage, healing your friendships, healing your city.

NCC, may you be a people who no longer live for yourself, but for him who died for you and was raised again.

Q&A for today.

Next Week: Redeemed Sexuality ~ PG13

Two Weeks: The Gift of Singleness + a special afternoon with Bryan Clarke (CM at the UofC).

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