Self Esteem For Men: How to Be Hip and Cool

ByLance Long

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Table of Contents

IntroductionYou’re crazy if you listen to what society saysWhere the heck did you get your low self-esteem, man?

What are the normal standards in young boys?Do you have the guts to admit you’ve been picked on?

Are you a loser or winner?Deadbeat dad or not, father’s role mattersBuilding accomplishments can be an excellent remedyWhat is the devastating impact of low self-esteem in a man’s life?Why not making enough money affects low self-esteem and what to do?Asking questions can be your best friend

Job finding questionsIncome increase questions

Why a low self-esteem is a choice?Get your rear end into gear, read something positive everyday, dude

Why happy people is an excellent medicine?Self-talk and low self-esteem are an evil combinationYou make your choices, bro, change your self-esteem by changing your self-talkYour body is one of the keys to changing your lifeThe secret to walking correctly for men

Why if you don’t smile your low self-esteem will not go awayThe secret to sitting down correctlyGood hand gestures help you feel good

Practice eye contact the right wayHow to dress cool and hip for high self-esteem

Personal speechWhy you should be grateful?Give other people complimentsSit your rear end where it makes a differenceWhy you can’t shut up but must say something?Don’t be lazy. Get your butt in the gymGive to others

Look for happiness and you’ll find itConclusion

Introduction

It is estimated that over 8 million men struggle with depression. Men, just like women, have a lot of pressure they have to deal with. Quiteoften it seems like the standard that men have to live up to is controlled by the media.

The ideal man is supposed to be someone who is strong in character, and emotions. They must have a strong, well-shaped physique. A lowself-esteem man isn’t well accepted by society. Such a person is looked down upon as being weak and a loser.

This is why men who struggle with low self-esteem have a tendency to stay in the closet. They do everything they can to hide how they thinkand feel. But, have no fear, there is help. This report can help you began the process of dealing with your low self-esteem.

It’s easier than you think. Changing low self-esteem as a man is very similar to changing your mind and habits. The person you say you areis based on a series of thoughts that follow you about all of the time.

What if, by changing those thoughts, you can change your low self-esteem? What if you can create thoughts that are more uplifting ratherthan downgrading?

You can begin to create a new you the real you, full of potential and vigor. If your reoccurring thoughts are more positive and inspiring, youcan begin to say you are a person of high self-esteem and confidence. You become who you think about most of the time. You become who youbelieve you are.

However, here are some things to consider. People only treat you based on who you believe you are. You are treated based on what youexpect. If you expect the worse, this is what you’ll get, more often than not. If you expect the best, this is also what you’ll get, most of the time.

Furthermore, have you considered that your body posture may be keeping you down? The way you use your body holds a profound effect onhow you think and feel. There is proven research that states our body posture can influence if you are feeling confident or if you are feeling downand out.

We can easily begin the process of changing your low self-esteem by solely dealing with your day to day thoughts that run through your mindas well as the way you use your body to maintain the right ideas and emotions.

Additionally, to overcome low self-esteem you will have to change how you think. But there are ways you can use your body posture to makethis much easier for you.

You’re crazy if you listen to what society says

Magazines, newspapers and television create who and what a man is thought to be. When you have Brad Pitt being named the sexiest manalive, even when some of us don’t talk about it, an image of what is expected of man is created.

You have to be blonde hair and blue eyes to be considered handsome and loved by women. A good man must look good but in a very subtlemanner. He must be a leader and provider.

There are many men who are not fazed by this because of confidence they have in themselves.

Others of us really struggle with this, the reason being is that we don’t meet the standard of what an appealing man is. When the picture ofthe right kind of man is beyond what we are able to meet, it can create a low self-esteem.

Society assists in producing men with low self-esteem. Most men enjoy interaction with the opposite sex. When these standards are set it’smuch harder for a man to win with the ladies. If a man has a hard time approaching the kind of woman they are interested in it’s disheartening anddiscouraging. And over a period of time it can create a low self-esteem.

An individual like this may be forced to settle and feel like a failure.

Although society has a standard, our world still consists of many different kinds of men. Some of us who are trying to compete with society’sstandard of what a man is are fighting a losing battle.

The standard of what man is should come from you. From this perspective you are only dealing with yourself and not other people. Ofcourse, this standard must be based on the desire to be a good person and treat others the way you would like to be treated.

Now let us take a look at where low self-esteem comes from.

Where the heck did you get your low self-esteem, man?

Often, low self-esteem in men comes from childhood. Our beliefs are shaped based on how we grow up. How we grow up creates how wethink. A series of ideas that are repeated over and over again become beliefs.

Also, any situations that are dramatic and intense help create our core beliefs. To boot, beliefs are created based on interaction withparents, siblings, friends and strangers, before birth while still in the mother’s womb. We began creating beliefs as infants and we continue tocreate them as grown adults.

Low self-esteem is created through negative encounters as children.

What are the normal standards in young boys?

There are different standards for young boys than there are for young girls. Toddler boys are expected to be stronger and to handle toughersituations. While toddler girls are allowed to show their emotions and what is considered weakness in our world today. If a little boy falls to theground, most often their dads do care but they expect for a young boy to be stronger and not cry as much. These parents sometimes say things like:‘you’re a big boy,’ ‘that didn’t hurt,’ ‘man up,’ and ‘don’t cry; only girls cry.’

Situations like these can begin the foundations for low self-esteem in a young boy. Although this isn’t always the case, it should besomething that is taken into consideration.

Men with low esteem were often picked on as children. This is the worst of all scenarios. Even as kids everyone wants to be liked. Beingaccepted and wanted is a major part of human needs. We all want to feel wanted and loved by everyone.

When there is a situation in which we are not liked, accepted, or feeling wanted, we usually end up feeling bad about it. We punish ourselvesfor it. We focus more on our weaknesses and make them bigger.

And we use what people say about us to become our reality and beliefs. In addition, these are the types of negative situations we remembermost as kids. We usually recall the worse encounters from childhood.

Sadly, people with low self-esteem usually refer to these occurrences a lot more often.

The reason we remember them is because there is so much emotion and thinking about these dramatic incidents over and over againforces us to recall them, and thereby become part of components that create a low self-esteem.

Low esteem is created based on the many similar specific occasions explained in the previous paragraph.

Do you have the guts to admit you’ve been picked on?

A lot of time little boys do not admit to getting picked on to their parents. Usually because they think they will brush it to the side or they arebeing picked on by a sibling. Situations like this really affect young boys psychologically. Something else that really affects men’s self-esteem ishaving their dad in their lives.

We men need guidance from our father as children and, even as grown men, sometimes we need some minor guidance. As a toddler wereally need closeness, guidance and bonding time with our dads. Young boys don’t really need a lot of time though. Most kids are happy with thirtyminutes to one hour spent with their dad daily. There’s no time that is more crucial than that.

Are you a loser or winner?

When we are picked on as children it begins to create low self-esteem. However, what affects low self-esteem the most is consistentfailures. We are always measuring our successes against losses as grown men and as kids.

Our happiness is based on how often we win as children. Boys who are good at sports, have a lot of friends, are always praised and spenda lot time with their dad tend to grow up with confidence and high self-esteem. Likewise boys, who are loners, are picked on a lot and are notcomplimented usually end up having low self-esteem.

Deadbeat dad or not, father’s role matters

Men are assumed to be stronger and able to handle tougher situations. It’s possible for a man to become strong and lead. Nevertheless, it issomething that must be taught and engrained in a little boy with caution. This idea is also applied to young boys. It is left to assume they can takecare of themselves. When they get picked on by other kids, more often than not, parents are not alarmed by it. They tend to brush what their toddlersays to the side. When they don’t like sports or something that is considered manly, they are pushed to do them anyway.

Not having our fathers in our lives enough will affect how we grow up in a negative way. We constantly compare ourselves with the men thatwe look up to, consciously and unconsciously. Even as kids, we want to understand how to be a boy. Our dad should always be the man we look upto. Even if there are other men we look up to.

A father can set the stage for what man is supposed to be, based on the way they treat the family. How he takes care of his wife, hisdaughters, finances, household and the way he behaves with other men and women.

A young boy is always watching his dad consciously and unconsciously. We need to really take this into consideration as fathers. In addition,they watch their moms to. But the focus is more on the dad. He sets the tone for the family and what kind of man a young boy will become.

This is why you find boys who did not have a father when growing up tend to feel unloved and grow up looking for love and acceptance in thewrong places.

Even if one’s father wasn’t there, a man can still be confident and strong, with high self-esteem.

One of the things you can do to begin overcoming low self-esteem is to begin comparing yourself with you. Reward yourself for succeedingand exceeding your expectations based on specific small goals that you set.

Building accomplishments can be an excellent remedy

In order to continue this process of dealing with low self-esteem we have to build on accomplishments one win at a time, reaching specificgoals that we set for ourselves.

You can begin setting goals for simple, and what may be considered trivial things, such as for smiling and keeping your head up high duringthe day.

A great thing about our mind and the human body is their ability to work with one another. Your mind will follow what your body does.

You can set a simple goal of completing a task for that day. This task can be anything you can think of. The goal can be something likefinishing all the work to be done that day.

You can set a goal on spending time with some friends of yours. It could be going to the gym. How about looking for a better job? If thatinvolves getting training to be able to do so, then do so, even if it means going back to school at night or taking specific training.

Be willing to do whatever it takes to reach your goal. The most important thing about building upon accomplishments is making sure youcreate easily attainable goals.

Once you have set your small goal, your next step is to decide how you are going to reward yourself.

There are a lot of different ways to reward oneself. Going out for ice-cream can be a reward. How about buying you a new piece of clothing,a pair of pants, shirt and tie? You can reward yourself with a vacation.

The reward can be anything that you enjoy doing. It could be whatever it is that you can think of right now.

Building upon your accomplishments is a great way to increase your confidence and make yourself feel strong and important. If you do thisright you can begin the process of building a stronger self-esteem.

The idea is to focus on the good things that are happening around you. Make every effort to not focus on the things that don’t go your way. Itdoesn’t mean you ignore them, just don’t intensify them.

What is the devastating impact of low self-esteem in a man’s life?

Most men’s happiness and joy goes hand in hand with what’s happening in his life. When a man has a low self-esteem, it’s easy to see. Itaffects every aspect of his life, his family, social life and dating life. He’s more inclined to be withdrawn, lazy, downcast and unable to perform to thebest of his ability.

Men like this usually have lower salaries. They don’t make enough money. They are not very active. They don’t have a social life.

Low self-esteem is one of the biggest motivation stealers. It will prevent you from trying at anything. You will not enjoy life. Your mind will focusmore on when things don’t work out for you than when they do.

The brain will only focus on things you give a lot of attention to. When you’re focusing on negative things you will see more of the same thing.You’ll find that you will meet people who also have low self-esteem and are usually down.

Our mind functions in such a way that it will see more of what you point out is important. Your reticular activator filter only focuses on thingsyou say mean something to you.

The biggest problem is not enjoying and making the best out of life because of this. You will miss out.

A low self-esteem is a choice. You don’t have to decide you have a low self-esteem because of all the reasons you have to convinceyourself.

You can decide that you have an excellent self-esteem and are confident.

Why not making enough money affects low self-esteem and what to do?

We men are expected to be providers financially, even though we live in a society that is pro women. More females want to have jobs andhelp provide for their family and themselves.

Nevertheless, it is still engrained into society that a man must have money. What's more, most men feel the natural deep inner need toprovide and have money to survive. When this isn’t the case it can create a low self-esteem.

This desire to provide is well rooted in us men. It’s part of the very essence of who we are, the provider, supplier, and cultivator.

A low self-esteem will exist in men who do not make enough money to live and also someone who has been out of a job for a long time. Nothaving a place to work can create all kinds of problems for a man.

He can feel insignificant, weak and unable to be what he was born to be - a provider. Lack of work can make a man feel incapable, like aloser.

Men who are in these types of situations for long periods of time usually have really low self-esteem.

The reality is individuals like this make their situations a lot worse than it is. They think and feel like losers because they are focusing on thewrong things.

Your brain only recalls the thoughts you give strong importance to. The same way you can think about how bad things are, is the same wayyou can think of a solution to the problem.

There are many solutions to any problem. Are you aware that when in these types of situations you think more deeply about it and make itworse because of the questions you are asking in your head?

A person who is having problems finding work usually thinks like this, ‘Why am I such a looser?’ ‘How come I can’t find work anywhere?’‘Who would hire me? I have nothing to offer,’ I don’t have the required skills.’

Do you notice the questions here are disempowering.

Whenever you are faced with any problem if you ask the right questions you can find the right answers that can help you get out of it.

Asking questions can be your best friend

Questions help guide our thoughts. Powerful questions have the power to help you come up with powerful answers. You can find answers alot easier if you’re asking the right questions. You can be a better problem solver. The answer to your money problems can be just a few goodquestions away.

When you’re not working, rather than ask questions that are guiding you in the wrong direction, ask questions that can guide you in the rightdirection.

Job finding questions

For example, here are some questions you can ask when looking for work. You first must already know what you financial responsibilitiesare and what kind of income you’ll need to survive comfortably.

· How can I find a job that pays me $100,000 per year? (You can use whatever number you desire here)· What training will I need to get this job?· How can I use the skills I already have to make $100,000 per year? (You can use whatever number you desire here)· Who do I know that can help me find a job that pays well?· Where do I look to find a job that pays well?· What research do I need to do to find this employment?· What companies do I have to apply to make this kind of money?· What position would I need to get?· What industry would I have to be in to get paid my desire income level?

Income increase questions

If you’re just looking for more money, here are some helpful questions to ask.

· How can I make more money easily?· What would I have to do to create more income?· What training do I need to create more income?· How do I get a promotion so I can make more money?· What secure investments can I get into to create more income?· What skills do I have I can use to create more income?· Is there anyone I know that can help me create more income?

Do not under estimate the power of this exercise. Questions are profound. Once you begin to find answers to your problems you can beginto build confidence again. It doesn’t matter what problems you have, begin the habit of asking good empowering questions to help you findanswers.

You will find that the answers are there. And your results will increase.

You can create joy by thinking this way. You will be able to solve your problems and become the man you’ve always wanted to be.

Why a low self-esteem is a choice?

An extremely profound way to see self-esteem is to see it from a perspective of choice. You decide what to think. You decide who you are. Ifyour self-esteem is low, you decided on that.

A high self-esteem is only a simple decision away. Decide to be confident and you can show this by what you do with your body. You candecide and change your posture. The choice to be free of being handicapped by yourself and handicapped in your mind can be undone andignored.

Decide that you will ignore your mind and listen to what you want to be happy.

Everyday we have decisions to make. You can decide to be happy and decide to be sad. You make the decision in your head.

If you are thinking negatively, you can decide to think positively. Let’s look at an example to illustrate this point, instead of saying, ‘I can’t dothis’ say, ‘stop,’ and instead say, ‘I can do this.’ It’s possible for you to do anything. When you’re tempted to think and say you can’t do somethinginstead say, ‘I can do this.’

You can do anything you put your mind to. Just believe you can, do whatever it takes to achieve it and you will. Make the decision to becomeconfident and you will. Something else you can do is listening to motivational speakers.

There are many choices out there. Focus on topics that have anything to do with achieving, high self-esteem, motivation and being your best.People like Les Brown, Tony Robbins, T Harv Eker, Brian Tracy, Jack Canfield, Earl Night and Gale, Dr. Norman Vincent Peal and Jim Rohn.

You don’t have to spend any money, although it would not hurt. You can just go to YouTube and watch a different video every day. Here’swhat you can do, type Youtube.com in your internet browser and just type the name of any of the guys above in the search box, for example, “JimRohn achieving” or “Tony Robbins motivation” then hit search.

Watch anything motivational every day. By listening to a motivational speaker you can begin to create a different mindset. You can start tobecome the person you’ve always wanted to be.

If you listen to something enough you will begin to create a new belief.

Get your rear end into gear, read something positive everyday, dude

It’s also helpful to read something positive every day. You can go to sites like, Positiveselftalk.com and effective-positive-thinking.com, anddrjerm.com. These are just a few sites amongst many that can help you find something positive to read every day.

You can buy great eBooks, similar to, “The Power of Positive Thinking” by Norman Vincent Peale, “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living”by Dale Carnegie, “The Amazing Results of Positive Thinking” by Dr. Norman Vincent Peal, the Bible and many others.

Take 15 minutes a day to read something positive from a book similar to the ones described above. By doing this you can assist your mindin developing a new belief. You need to do this for as long as it takes to create a new you. This can be done for the rest of your life if you have to.

Why happy people are an excellent medicine?

It’s critical that you are around people that are joyful and happy. It will help you quite a bit.

If you can’t be around happy people, watch videos on people who are happy daily. Make a habit of consistently feeding your mind withpositive things. It will help you change.

By spending time around people who are happier than sad you can adapt to their ways. We are creatures that learn by watching. You canlearn how to be joyful by watching other joyful folks around you.

Joining a group of successful people, happy hour at a local bar, and time spent with friend who makes you happy can all help. Anything youcan think of can help you.

Use the examples of who to listen to and what eBooks to read that were given in the previous section.

Self-talk and low self-esteem are an evil combination

Your self-talk is one of the main things that create self-esteem. Do you realize that in order to create a low self-esteem you have to do someconvincing of yourself?

Self-talk are the things you say to yourself inside your head. And sometimes you say things out loud to yourself. Nevertheless, our inner talkis very important - we become what we say we are. The things you say to yourself have an intense effect on the things you think about.

We are our own worst enemy. We say the worst things to ourselves - things we wouldn’t say to our worst enemy, sometimes.

A man with a low self-esteem says things like:

· I don’t fit in· Women are always turning me down· I’m interested in her but I don’t know what to say· I can’t do this· I can’t take this risk· I don’t have what it takes· I’m so stupid· I don’t have the skills· I don’t have the schooling· I don’t know the right people· I’m not smart enough· I’m not strong enough· I’m too fat· I’m too skinny· If my dad was there for me none of this would have happen· My dad did not teach me how to be a man· I’m not made out of money

Most times, men with low self-esteem usually do not have the confidence to believe they can do anything.

A simple shift in your self-talk can change things around for you. You need to focus on incorporating ideas that encourage you. The worldputs us down enough. You should, in every situation you get, put yourself up. Never say in your mind, ‘I’m so stupid,’ ‘I’m an idiot.’

All of these things are just choices. You decided to say these negative things to yourself. What if you decide to say positive things toyourself? You can indeed change your entire life this way, one day at a time.

You are not the only person on earth that things sometimes don’t work out for. Every person in this world goes through times when things donot work out for them.

The problem isn’t the obstacles because this is something that is guaranteed in life for everyone. The problem lies in how you deal with theissues that arise.

Your inner talk is where we deal with predicaments. When something goes wrong, instead of saying something negative about it, saysomething positive about it. It may be a difficult task at first but if you do the steps mentioned earlier it will work.

Listen and read something positive everyday, ask questions that help find the answer and you can be begin to create a better self-talk.

You can choose who you are based on what you say inside your head. You don’t have to settle for a negative perspective of yourself. There’sa saying: who you really are comes out when you’re by yourself. Well, when we practice self-talk there’s no time when we are most by ourselves. Weuse our inner voice everywhere.

That’s why I said earlier a low self-esteem is a choice. We choose to let our past get to us. We choose to become down about things. Wedecide to interpret things as certain.

We make a clear choice to say yes or no. We decide if we are going to agree or disagree. We decide to say yes I belong, and no I don’t.You make a clear choice.

With the same token we can say instead:

· Yes we can· Yes I’m· I’m smart· I’m happy· I can get a high paying job· I can get an excellent job· I can make the money I want to make· I can meet a great girl· I can provide for my family· I can be a man that a woman loves· I can help out my kids and family· I can do the things I always thought I could

You make your choices, bro, change your self-esteem by changing your self-talk

In order to defeat low self-esteem you’ve got to change your inner voice. You need to begin saying more positive things inside your head.Basically, get rid of any kind of negative self-talk that you have. Who you say you are is a series of thoughts that you run in your mind over and overagain.

By changing the things you say you can become completely different. This will take some work - even years - but if you work at it. You can getresults much faster, if you did not.

Here is some uplifting self-talk you can apply to any area of life:

· I have what it takes· I’m motivated· I’m a provider· I have a positive self-talk· I am as capable as anyone else out there· I can find a solution· I’m positive· I’m an achiever· I get things done· I’m successful· I know with time and effort I can accomplish anything· I’m accepted by others· I accept others· I am comfortable in front of people and say the right things· I’m confident· I know who I am and I am special· I have a high self-esteem· Anyone who meets me will remember how fascinating I am· I’m intelligent· I can accomplish any task set out before me· I keep a smile on my face· I find things out when no clear answer is defined· I know how to dress· I am worthwhile, successful, and happy· I know how to talk to a girl· I know how to treat my wife well· I love life· I love people· I have a lot to give to others· I can make a difference· I can be a great dad· I’m a great friend

Decide to use these inner talk examples everyday. Copy them down somewhere. Email them to yourself to place on your desk top. Printthem out and leave them in your car. Say the positive statements all of the time.

If you say something negative to yourself you can change it with a one of the positive statements we have here. A positive statement is tentimes more powerful than a negative one. You use these positive statements throughout your day.

You can also make your own positive statements by saying the opposite of anything negative that you say.

Your body is one of the keys to changing your life

Your posture affects how you feel about yourself. Your confidence doesn’t just come from your thoughts alone but how you carry your body.

Your body posture can make a big difference on how you feel. Most importantly, what you do with your body can change your mind. Did youknow that your body posture and emotions are connected to one another? The ability to move a certain muscle in your body affects whatemotions you feel. A very intriguing statement indeed, so powerful that it is stated in bold.

Likewise, low self-esteem is shown by your body posture. You most often do not smile. You don’t walk fast. You seem downcast. You aremore self-conscious.

Our bodies can change our mind. Our thoughts can affect what we do, who we are and our outcome. Posture is very important. You want tofake it until it becomes you by using the correct posture. This is one of the things that really work to help people. You don’t need to spend a lot ofmoney, you can easily change your situations by simply changing your body stance and how you carry yourself. You should take this very seriously.Simple changes in your posture influence your life in a very powerful way.

The body posture you have mirrors the emotions you are feeling. If you practice the right body posture you will have the right emotions to gowith it. Even if you are not feeling the right emotions but have the body posture that most relates to it then you can create that emotion just from yourstance and how you move your body.

What do you think? Simple, right?

A consistent change in your body posture, over time, can change your life.

Here are some specific areas you can change.

The secret to walking correctly for men

Your body posture has the ability to change your brain and body chemistry. When walking, try to walk straight with your head up, it’s not agood idea to look down a lot as you walk because this signifies a lot of thinking and more downcast emotions - insecurity. Take big steps as youwalk with your head up.

Aim at walking faster while using more space as you go. Swing your arm farther apart as you walk. This will change how you feel and howyou think. Individuals who walk faster tend to have more confidence in general. It’s a good idea. The reason to do this is to make you bigger, moreimportant. Not to mention motion creates emotion. The more you move, the better you’ll feel.

Men who have low self-esteem usually move at a slower pace. They are less inclined to be as active. Moving a lot can change one’s moodquite a bit and quickly.

Why if you don’t smile your low self-esteem will not go away

You can use smiling to get out of depression or a low self-esteem. Make certain to smile and say ‘hi’ to people that walk by you. Smile eventhough you don’t feel like smiling. Say, hi even though you don’t feel like it.

You should smile no matter where you are. It is virtually impossible to feel sad while you smile. There have been tests done by researchersthat prove this. Try it.

By smiling you can change your mood from bad to good. You can make other people feel comfortable around you as well.

Watching a funny movie can keep you smiling and make you feel amazing. Try viewing funny videos on YouTube. YouTube lists million uponmillions of videos - there are tons of videos you can use to help you smile.

You need to smile while walking, sitting down, on the phone and anywhere else you can think of. Use every excuse you can to smile andlaugh. Laugh at jokes that are barely funny. Smile for all and any reason.

Don’t worry about other people looking at you. You are working on your recovery; anything you can do to move the process along is great. Byshowing your teeth more people will smile back at you. You will attract more people who are happy.

The secret to sitting down correctly

When sitting down at your desk, you should sit down in a way in which you try to take up more space. Also, make sure you are keeping yourback straight and your shoulders back, as if puffing up your chest. The reason for doing this is to feel bigger, in charge, important, confident.

You can build confidence by sitting in this manner. Don’t forget you must keep on smiling.

Don’t cross your arm or legs. Closing them can give the effect of making yourself smaller and more downcast. Rather, keep your legs apart,take up as much space as you can in order to create more self-confidence. Do not slouch your back or bend your back. Make certain you keep yourback straight. Psychologically you are creating power, strength and self-assurance.

This will help you feel more comfortable in your own skin. When on the phone do the same thing, make sure you smile to people you aretalking to.

Good hand gestures help you feel good

Use your hand gestures. Use your hand a lot more than you would normally when talking. Using your hands and moving them with each wordyou say makes you feel excited, happy and strong. You want to do anything that can help you feel good. Again, when you move your body you willfeel better.

Practice eye contact the right way

It’s very important you make eye contact with other people. Eye contact can help you feel more confident and connected with others.

Someone with low self-esteem typically looks away from people in social settings and usually makes no eye contact whatsoever. In the U.S.,and in similar countries, it makes people feel uncomfortable when you don’t look them in the eye.

Lack of eye contact also shows disinterest. By practicing eye contact toward others they will feel more confident around you and you in turnwill be more confident.

If it’s difficult for you to look people in the eye than try staring in the space between their eyes and nose, they will not know the difference.While you’re in a social setting or out somewhere make eye contact with everyone that you first come in contact with.

At first you may have some difficulty with this but it does portray a message of confidence to others.

Are you seeing a pattern here? You do the suggestions for 30 days and you will have changed your life - guaranteed. The body has theamazing capability of building confidence that most of us ignore and do not pay attention to.

How to dress cool and hip for high self-esteem

Dressing well can create confidence. You will feel happier. The way you dress can have a powerful effect on your self-esteem. Individuals,who are sharp, are more confident.

People are not as conscious about your appearance as much as you are. The way you act and how you are around others changes whenyou’re not dressed sharply. Dressing down and out of style can make you feel less confident and attractive.

You can make a big difference by simply making sure you cut your hair and shave often, at the very least keep your mustache and beardnicely shaped. It’s very important you keep up with the latest trends and styles.

There are some stores that are mentioned in the next paragraph. You don’t have to spend a lot of money. Remember, with clothes, theamount of money you’re willing to spend affects quality and you want quality clothes. For two reasons, not only does it look better but they also lastlonger. If your clothes are able to last you can create a very nice wardrobe over a short period of time.

And let’s not forget to mention, especially for men, expensive clothes stay in style much longer. Don’t even think about buying cheap clothes,not only will it not last; most do not look that great. As a result, you’ll have to buy more cheap clothes which end up being more expensive.

Dry cleaning your clothes will also make them last and keep their quality longer.

Have you noticed men who have nice suits on and nice shoes? They are most often powerful people. Take the time to watch men that aredressed nicely as they walk by you. They seem to be more confident, stand taller, and are happier and feel better. Those guys you walk by whohave old clothing tend to be more down and hunched over. Test this; let me know what you see.

Try buying yourself nicer suits and clothes. You can also purchase better looking pants, shirts, shoes, socks and underwear. It’s very easy todress nicely for a man. We do not need to do a lot to succeed at this.

All you need to do is just get yourself a hair cut from a good barber. You want to make sure you cut your hair nicely.

Next you can go to the following stores to find nice outfits to wear for men. The outfits are sometimes put together on mannequins. If therearen’t many options you can just ask a woman or man at the store that appears to dress nicely to help you put something together. You notice I said‘who appears to look nice’ If they dress bad, do not ask them to help you put together outfits.

Visits stores like, Today’s Men, Macys, JC Penney, Delancey street in lower east side, Manhattan, New York (oh my gosh, amazing spot toshop for men), Tommy Hilfiger, Ralph Lauren, Timberland, Outlets, REI, Aldos, Saturday NYC, Billy’s Reid, SID Mashburn, Nordstrom, Portland DryGoods Co. Tom Ford, Union Made, Paul Stuart, J Crew and many more.

Personal speech

You can write something great about yourself that point out your strengths and recite it out loud to yourself in front of the mirror. For example,you can say, ‘I’m confident and also a very important person. I succeed at whatever I do. I can do anything no matter what it is.’ You can make upyour own.

Why you should be grateful?

Something you can do is take time out each day to be grateful. What’s great about being grateful is it puts you in an excellent mood and canhelp you to become happier and more confident. It also prevents you from focusing on negative things and going back into a downward spiral.

There are times we think a lot about the things we want; the negative thing about this is, if we do it too much, we begin to think about why wecan’t. It makes us feel like we are unable to accomplish it. A good thing to do to help avoid this is to practice being grateful everyday.

Repeat and think about everything you are grateful for. Focus on things you have done great at and have succeeded at in the past, thepeople in your life and a positive outlook. Take about 5-10 minutes a day to do this. You will get excellent results from this.

Give other people compliments

What you can do as part of your daily task or adventure. You should compliment other people. This is a great way to get out of your head.Low self-esteem stems from thinking too much about your shortcomings.

By talking to other folks you can begin to create a different attitude and become stronger in who you are and how you feel. People will tend tolike you better when you take the time out to compliment them. It will create a double effect not only will you help people to feel good, but you willalso feel better about yourself from being outwardly focused. People will also compliment you, therefore making you feel great about yourselffurther.

Sit your rear end where it makes a difference

When you are in class, office, meeting, an event, always sit upfront. People with low self-esteem tend to want to sit in the back of the roombecause they don’t want to be seen by others and have more people focusing on them.

Yet, by sitting in the front you can get noticed more. The more you do it, the more it will help you get over the fear. But most of all it can createhigh self-esteem and confidence over time.

Why you can’t shut up but must say something?

You should take time to speak up when given the chance. It might be difficult at first to speak up but if you keep doing it you can build a lot ofconfidence. The reason you want to do this is you normally wouldn’t speak up because of the low self-esteem you have.

By taking time to speak up you’ll realize it isn’t so bad at all. You will begin to create more self-belief. If you keep doing this you will eventuallybuild high self-esteem and become a completely different person.

Let’s not forget to mention, when in a group setting, most often people tend to feel the same way. Most people in the room are probablyafraid to speak up just like you are. Also, people are a lot more accepting these days than you think.

Taking the time to say something every time there’s a group discussion and meeting will mean you’ll become a much better speaker inpublic, more secure in the way you think and other people will see you as a leader.

Don’t be lazy. Get your butt in the gym

There are a lot of benefits to working out or exercising. You body has something called endorphins and when you move your body you createmore of it. The longer you work out, the more endorphins you create.

Again this is a great way to feel joyful and get in shape at the same time. Exercising consistently creates discipline and is a great start toyour day. Exercising in the morning can be an excellent start to your day.

Give to others

As mentioned prior, a low self-esteem is created by thinking about our flaws too much. Finding a way to give back to other folks can reallyhelp you to begin to get out of yourself and start to see someone else. You can create more confidence because you are helping other people.

It will make you feel wanted and important. Helping someone else will not only help that person but also you. We always reap what we sow.What we reap may come back in different blessings; nevertheless, good things do come back to us.

Look for happiness and you’ll find it

If you look for things to be happy about, you will see them. You can find things to be happy about. You can watch great comedies to makeyou feel better. Who is your favorite comedian? Make a goal to watch movies they create. An amazing movie I can recommend is “Death at aFuneral,” the British version. This film will have you laughing your pants off.

Ease down the rules that you create for yourself. Laugh at anything that is funny in nature. Decide to look for things that will make you happyand you will find them. Spending time with someone you find fun - your kids, a brother, uncle, sister -there are many things you can look for that canincrease your joy.

The biggest issue with low self-esteem is that we focus more on negative things rather than positive things. But the truth is, no matter what itis we do, we will always face ups and downs. Things in life will never go exactly the way we plan. If this is taken into consideration, it’s much easierto deal with life and obstacles.

Conclusion

You need to practice everything mentioned in this book every single day. Your low self-esteem was created over time and with a lot of self-focus. And so, to create high self-esteem you must practice the suggestions over and over again in order to create and develop stronger neurons inyour brain which will make this permanent. Eventually, over time, you will become the man you’ve always wanted to be.

Table of ContentsIntroductionYou’re crazy if you listen to what society saysWhere the heck did you get your low self-esteem, man?What are the normal standards in young boys?Do you have the guts to admit you’ve been picked on?Are you a loser or winner?Deadbeat dad or not, father’s role mattersBuilding accomplishments can be an excellent remedyWhat is the devastating impact of low self-esteem in a man’s life?Why not making enough money affects low self-esteem and what to do?Asking questions can be your best friendJob finding questionsIncome increase questionsWhy a low self-esteem is a choice?Get your rear end into gear, read something positive everyday, dudeWhy happy people is an excellent medicine?Self-talk and low self-esteem are an evil combinationYou make your choices, bro, change your self-esteem by changing your self-talkYour body is one of the keys to changing your lifeThe secret to walking correctly for menWhy if you don’t smile your low self-esteem will not go awayThe secret to sitting down correctlyGood hand gestures help you feel goodPractice eye contact the right wayHow to dress cool and hip for high self-esteemPersonal speechWhy you should be grateful?Give other people complimentsSit your rear end where it makes a differenceWhy you can’t shut up but must say something?Don’t be lazy. Get your butt in the gymGive to othersLook for happiness and you’ll find itConclusion