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Self-Care
Today’s Agenda: � Self-Care: What is it � Why do we need it � How to “self-care”
� Ideas for self-care � A Lesson on Mindfulness
Self-Care: What is it? Taking good care of you, means the people in your life will receive the best of you, rather than what’s left of you.
- Carl Bryan
Why does it matter? When you take time to replenish your spirit, it allows you to serve others from the overflow. You cannot serve from an empty vessel.
-Eleanor Brownn
What we’re up against: Stress, Burnout, & Compassion Fatigue
Stress Stress is the trash of modern life — we all generate it but if you don't dispose of it properly, it will pile up and overtake your life.
- Terri Guillemets
Stress takes its toll… � Immune system � Cardiovascular system � Nervous system � Increases inflammation � Increases negative mood states � Increases adrenaline and cortisol (stress)
levels � Etc., etc., etc.
Stress vs. Burnout Stress Burnout
Over-engagement Disengagement
Emotions are overactive Emotions are blunted
Produces urgency & hyperactivity
Produces helplessness and hopelessness
Loss of energy Loss of motivation, ideals, and hope
Leads to anxiety disorders Leads to detachment and depression
Primary damage is physical Primary damage is emotional
Compassion Fatigue Compassion is sometimes the fatal capacity for feeling what it is like to live inside somebody else's skin. It is the knowledge that there can never really be any peace and joy for me until there is peace and joy finally for you too.
- Frederick Buechner
Symptoms of Compassion Fatigue � Increased anxiety, blaming, isolation � Impulsivity/reactivity � Increased perception of demand/threat � Increased frustration/anger � Poor self-care (i.e., hygiene, appearance) � Sleep disturbance � Difficulty concentrating � Change in weight/appetite � Somatic symptoms
So what does self-care look like? To experience peace does not mean that your life is always blissful. It means that you are capable of tapping into a blissful state of mind amidst the normal chaos of a hectic life.
-Jill Bolte Taylor
“Doing” Self-Care 1. Ideas for self-care 2. Mindfulness
Ide
as fo
r Self-C
are
Stress Relief Activities � Engage one or more of your senses to
relieve stress
� Read a good book � Watch your favorite movie/tv show � Engage your visual senses in painting or
photography � Allow yourself to day dream for 10 minutes � Use visualization techniques � Evoke good memories from looking
at a memory or story board, scrapbook, etc.
See
Listen � Sit outside and enjoy the sounds � Listen to a favorite piece of music � Listen to some sounds; lapping water, etc. � Listen to a motivational recording � Play relaxing music � Listen to a radio program with your eyes
closed � Listen to a favorite book on tape
Smell � Burn some aromatherapy oils � Enjoy the aroma of scented candles � Do some baking- the mixture of aromas
and soothing movements � Enjoy outdoor smells hiking � Enjoy the aroma of freshly brewed tea or
coffee
Taste/Talk � Chew a piece of gum � Use deep breathing exercises � Eat a piece of dark chocolate � Use deep breathing exercises � Repeat affirmations out loud � Sing � Laugh � Have a chat with someone who
listens
Touch � Exercise � Squeeze a stress ball � Pet your animal � Wear soft, warm clothing � Bake- enjoy the soothing, repetitive
movements � Play a musical instrument � Have a massage � Yoga or pilates
Even more options…
Distraction
• Conversation • Listen to talk
radio • Do a puzzle • Play a game • Make a list • Learn something
new • Clean • Garden • Arts & crafts
Grounding
• Use your body and senses
• Smell fragrances • Slowly taste
food • Notice colors
around you • Walk on grass
barefoot • Squeeze clay or
mud • Yoga, meditate,
exercise
Emotional Release
• Go for a run/exercise
• Take a cold shower
• Have a good cry • Watch a funny
show • Watch a sad
movie • Dance to music
Self Love
• Massage hands with cream
• Manicure your nails
• Cook a special meal
• Clean your house (or just make your bed)
• Bubble bath or long shower, brush hair
Thought Challenge
• Write down negative thoughts then list all the reasons they may not be true
• Imagine someone you love had these thoughts – what advice would you give them?
Access your Higher Self
• Help someone else
• Smile at strangers (see how many smiles you get back)
• Pray • Volunteer • Do random acts
of kindness • Join a cause
That’s great, but…
what about when you’re in the moment?
Self-Care: In the Midst of Life � <iframe width="560" height="315"
src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/U2v9ZX-DmdM?list=PL0G_h7C6IqI1DtWBYAZT0fA6xE1nyebEC" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>
Self-Care: In the Midst of Life Practicing Mindfulness
What mindfulness is NOT � NOT positive thinking � NOT a way to clear your mind � NOT just a distraction � Does NOT require any particular religious
or cultural belief system � Is NOT something we acquire
Mindfulness: Definition #1 � Mindfulness is to be aware. To be aware when
you are breathing in and to be aware of when you are breathing out… it is the capactiy to be aware of what is here. Anything can be the object of mindfulness. Your breath. The sky. It is to be in touch with our felt experience in each moment.
Thich Nhat Hanh Book Recommendation:
Peace in Every Step
Mindfulness: Definition #2 � Mindfulness is paying attention, on
purpose, in the present, and non-judgmentally, to the unfolding experience moment by moment.
Jon Kabat-Zinn Book Recommendation:
Full Catastrophe Living
Mindfulness: Definition #3 � Mindfulness is to distinguish awareness
from mental activity, it is to learn to be aware of our own mental states without being caught in them.”
Jack Kornfield Book Recommendation:
Wise Heart
Three Elements of Mindfulness
Mindfulness
Attitude
Attention
Intention
1. Intention It's only when we meditate for its own sake, rather than trying to get something from it, that we find the results we're after.
- Ed Halliwell
2. Attention � Awareness of the present moment � Become aware of our mind’s activity
� Judgments: liking, disliking � Associations: memories, stories, comparisons � Emotional: what emotions are coloring our
perspective � Commentary: our thoughts comment on all
our experiences
3. Attitude � Non-judging � Patience � Beginner’s Mind � Trust � Non-Striving � Acceptance � Letting go
Being vs. Doing Being Doing
Striving Non-striving
Avoidance Approach
Thoughts as “real” Thoughts as thoughts
Living in past and future Living in the present moment
Indirect experience Direct experience
Automatic Intentional
Mindfulness in Practice
� Formal practice: meditate, body scans, breathing exercises, etc.
� Informal practice: awareness of body sensations, thoughts, emotions, and sensory input during daily life, “in the moment”
Mindfulness in Practice � Increase awareness � Placing our attention � Developing a new relationship with our
experience � Being Mind � Responding to experience based on
awareness
Stress Reaction vs. Response
Stress Reaction vs. Response
� External Event à Internal Event à Alarm Reactivity à Stress Reaction à Acute hyper arousal à Increases chance of survival in a dangerous and hostile situation
Instinctual Response to Threat 1. Fight, flight, or freeze 2. Problem solve
What keeps us stuck in distress
Stress Reaction vs. Response
� Introducing conscious process that influences the flow of events that are likely to bring about automatic reactivity
Mindful Response to Threat � Be with and approach our experience � See things as they actually are, in the here
and now of this moment � Bringing a friendly curiosity to our experience � Investigating our experience � Non-fixing, not trying to change what is � Chooses to respond based on full and current
information, rather than habitual reacting
Manage Stress Mindfully � Allows us to respond wisely and
appropriately � Instead of adding to the difficulty, as it is
perceived, through habitual (instinctual) reactions
Why practice mindfulness? � Lasting decrease in physical and
psychological symptoms � An increase in ability to relax � Reduction in pain/or enhanced coping
with pain � Greater energy and enthusiasm for life � Improved self-esteem
RAIN of Compassion � Recognition – notice what’s happening
� Acceptance – say “yes”, allow, make room for experience
� Investigate – be curious, even familiar experiences do not repeat
� Non-identification – become a witness to the experience. Do not get caught in it
� + Compassion – maintaining an attitude of kindness, friendliness, and gentleness towards self and others
When can you practice mindfulness?
whenever you’re breathing!
Self-Care Training Prepared by Allie Gross, MSW Intern
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