7/31/2019 Scooby Doo movie review
I never liked Scooby Doo as a kid -- I thought the cartoon was stupid, even for a
Hanna-Barbaric cartoon, and I hated the moronic taglines: Scooby snack,jinkies, and so on. The characters were as flat as the tepid animation, and ofcourse every episode ended with and I would have gotten away with it if it hadntbeen for those meddling kids.
Flash forward thirty years or so and every lame-ass Hollywood exec is looking forthat hot nostalgia property to remake because as we all know studio executives arenot paid to be original, artistic, or to think. They are paid to take low-risk gamblesand produce high-profit movies. Remaking a beloved classic is easier than foistingoff something new on the public, and despite the fact that countless remakes havebeen atrocious films, they keep dipping into the shallow pool of 60s and 70s TV togive todays actors something to do.
Somehow someone involved with a live action Scooby Doo movie managed tohornswaggle Freddie Prinze Jr. into agreeing to it. Sadly, that pretty muchgreenlighted the flick, as his coattail-riding buddy Matthew Lillard signed on, as did,inexplicably, his intelligent, talented, and beautiful wife, Sarah Michelle Gellar. Justthrow in some chick to play Velma and a crappy looking CGI Scooby and youre allset.
Actually, the movie isnt obnoxious or annoying, its just incredibly, incrediblydumb. Everything is loud, stupid, and attempts to be funny. The jokes are weak,the plot is weak -- even the acting is pretty weak. I guess people who really like
Scooby Doo the cartoon will appreciate pee jokes and fart jokes and burping jokes,but I kept waiting for something that was actually funny to happen (only once did Ilaugh, at an actually humorous line of Shaggys. The rest of the movie I was mostlyembarrassed that I was watching it -- even for free).
Likable as he is, I cant understand how Freddie Prinze Jr. has a career. Hes a nicelooking boy and all, but he doesnt have a heck of a lot of talent. His best decisionin this life was sticking close to Sarah, who isnt much better than he is in this film.
She doesnt even look all that particularly good in purple. The only surprise in thewhole film is Lillard, whose staunch refusal to ever break out of character rendershis Shaggy a reasonable homage. I wouldnt have thought Lillard capable ofmimicry, but hes not bad here.
Its a dumb movie. Its solely meant for kids; anyone over 12 can skip watching it.Which in a way is sad, because if they had made this film with the same spirit as
the two Brady Bunch movies -- that is, making fun of the subject matter -- it couldhave been really funny. Just make two changes: cast Nikki Cox -- who looks likeDaphne in real life -- instead of Gellar, and cast Mike Myers as Velma. It still mightnot be pretty, but at least it would have been funny.