Rosebud Was a Dog

8/3/2019 Rosebud Was a Dog

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Rosebud was a Dog

By

Michael Dong

Revised 09/09/10



INT. RECEPTION AREA - DAY

A SECRETARY sits behind a long desk that extends across thewall at the back of the room answering the phone with ahands-free headset while typing on a computer.

On the wall behind the desk is the name, "Ascension Talent

Agency." The large reception area has several couches andglass end tables with copies of this morning’s entertainmenttrades.

The look and feel of the room is modern. The artworkdecorating the walls highlights this style.

SECRETARY(answering the phone)

ATA, please hold...ATA, how may Idirect your call? Thank you.

The elevator doors open and ORSON WELLES, a conservatively

dressed 25 year old exits the elevator and walks across thereception area toward the desk.

ORSONHi. I have a 10AM...

The secretary does not even look up to acknowledge him butraises her hand to signal to wait. Picking up on this Orsonpolitely stops talking.

SECRETARYATA, how may I direct yourcall?...He’s not available but Ican transfer you to his assistant.

(to Orson)How may I help you?

ORSONHi. I have a 10AM appointment withMichael Shapiro. My name is OrsonWelles.

SECRETARY(dialing the extension andspeaking into her headset)

I have a Orson Welles here for 10AMappointment with Mr. Shapiro.(to Orson)

Please have a seat and someone willbe with you shortly.

Orson walks over to one of the couches and sits down. Hepicks up a copy of the Hollywood Reporter and beginsreading.

(CONTINUED)



Michael Dong 2.

MARY DWYER, an attractive 24 year old dressed in formalbusiness attire with mousy brown hair enters the room from adoor next to the reception desk. She walks to the seatingarea.

MARY

Mr. Welles?

ORSON(rising to his feet)

Yes.

MARYHi. I am Mary Dwyer, Mr. Shapiro’sassistant. Follow me if you will.

INT. ATA MAIN OFFICE FLOOR- DAY

Mary leads Orson through the door into the main office ofATA. The din of people at their desks working on phones andcomputers fills the room. Orson eyes widen as he observesthe fast paced workers in front of him.

MARYMr. Welles, can I get you somethingto drink? An espresso, a softdrink, perhaps a bottled water?

Completely distracted by the manic speed of the office,Orson is oblivious to Mary.

MARYMr. Welles?

ORSON(snapping to attention)

Oh, I’m sorry. What did you say?

MARYCan I get you something to drink?

ORSONNo...no thank you, Ms. Dwyer. Tellme, is it always this busy here?

MARYYeah. This is pretty much businessas usual here. We represent clientsin film, television, music andsports. And we have offices here,New York City, Chicago, Nashville,Vancouver, London and Hong Kong.



3.

Mary and Orson walk past several cubicles and offices to amassive corner office.

INT. SHAPIRO’S OFFICE - DAY

A large ceiling-to-floor window at the back of the officeoffers a picturesque view of the Hollywood Hills. A hugeglass topped desk dominates the room.

Two chairs are placed in front of the desk and there is aleather sofa along the right wall. MICHAEL SHAPIRO, a 46year old who is sharply dressed in an Italian suit, sitsfacing the window in a high back executive leather officechair.

He is speaking on a wireless headset and does not noticeOrson and Mary enter the room.

MICHAELListen, you have our counter-offerand we don’t intend to negotiateany further on this matter. So ifthose are terms that you can workwith then let’s make this happen,otherwise I’m not sure what else wehave to discuss...okay...that’sfine...call me at the end of theday.

Michael swivels his chair towards his desk and notices Orsonand Mary.

MARYMichael, this is Orson Welles.

MICHAELThank you, Mary. Sit down, Orson.

Mary leaves the room as Michael and Orson begin theirmeeting.

ORSONI really appreciate you meetingwith me, sir. My father sends youhis best.

MICHAELYour father saved my ass in collegeby giving me clean urine so I couldpass my drug tests. We were on thebaseball team together and I wouldhave lost my scholarship if it

(CONTINUED)



Michael Dong 4.

MICHAELwasn’t for your dad. So when hecalled me asking if I’d meet withyou, I couldn’t say no.

ORSON

Wow. I knew you and my dad playedbaseball together but he nevermentioned the urine.

MICHAELYour old man was definitely a hellof a guy. So tell me Orson, whatare you working on?

ORSONI have a script that I justfinished. I emailed it toyou. Did you get a chance to read

it?

MICHAELListen, Orson. I’m not going tobullshit you. I don’t readscripts. I have readers that dothat for me and then they writecoverage. If the coverage is good,the script gets passed up thechain.

(searching through papers onhis desk)

In fact, I believe Mary gave me the

coverage for your script.

ORSONSo what did the coverage say?

MICHAELI didn’t read that either but themere fact that Mary brought it tome assures that enough gatekeepershave read your script and they havegiven you a thumbs up on at thevery least having some skills as awriter. If the coverage was bad,

it would have never made it to mydesk. So why don’t you pitch meyour script.

ORSONIt’s called Citizen Kane. It’s thestory of the rise and fall of anewspaper tycoon, Charles Foster

(CONTINUED)



Michael Dong 5.

ORSONKane, whose wealth and powerisolate him from ever knowing love.

MICHAELThat’s it?

ORSONWell...it’s told through a seriesof flashbacks investigating Kane’sdying word...rosebud. It examineshis ultimately tragic life whichincludes his abandonment by hisparents, two failed marriages and afailed campaign for the U.S.Senate.

MICHAEL(sarcastically)

Christ, kid...I’m dying to hear howthis ends.

ORSONIn the end, Kane dies alone in hispalatial estate and it is revealedthat his final word was the name ofa sled from his childhood; the onlytime when he was truly happy.

MICHAELHoly shit, kid. You got yourself areal tearjerker. Are you going to

give cyanide capsules to everyonewho watches this depressing film?

ORSONI don’t think it’s depressing atall. It’s a pragmatic story thatshows happiness can never beequated to the amount of money youhave. I think it will resonatewith audiences in the currenteconomic downturn.

MICHAEL

You got it all wrong if you thinkthe public can relate to a story ofa guy who is richer than god but isdepressed because his mommy anddaddy didn’t hug him enough.

(CONTINUED)



Michael Dong 6.

ORSONThat’s not what I was saying atall, sir.

MICHAELListen, kid...in shitty economic

times, the audience whats to bedistracted and entertained, notreminded about how bad thingsare. Why the hell do you thinkAvatar was so successful? Peopleloved it because it took them to afaraway place for three hours. Aplace away from double digitunemployment and home foreclosures.

ORSONSo you don’t think audiences aresophisticated enough for real

character driven stories anymore?

MICHAELYou got to give the audience whatthey want. At the top of the listof what audiences want is sex andviolence. Mix in some CGI and youhave box office gold.

ORSONI don’t know, sir. I think filmstoday play to the lowest commondenominator and audiences thirst

for films with some substance.

MICHAELAnd I think the Twlight movies, theSex and the City movies and thePirates of the Caribbean moviesprove that the audience only wantto be entertained. They arewaiting to be spoon fed whateverwe’re serving regardless of thesubstance.

ORSONSo what about Citizen Kane, sir?

MICHAELIt sounds like you wrote a nicespec script that shows off youskills as a writer and that’sdefinitely a plus. If it had alittle action or some T and A, it

(CONTINUED)



Michael Dong 7.

MICHAELwould be more marketable...but Igotta be honest with you, CitizenKane is a tough sell.

ORSON

I was also hoping to direct andmaybe play the lead role.

MICHAEL(jumping up from his chair andrushing to the window)

I don’t see it. Maybe it wentaround the corner.

ORSON(confused)

What...what are you looking for?

MICHAELI am looking to see if the god damntruck you fell off of was still onthe street so I could drop kick youback on it and send your ass backto Iowa.

ORSONWisconsin, sir.

MICHAELWhat?

ORSONI’m not from Iowa, sir. I’m fromWisconsin.

MICHAELTotally irrelevant...

(walking back to desk andsitting down)

because regardless of where you arefrom you sound like every otherclueless dreamer who shows up inthis town from middle America.

ORSONSir?

MICHAELIf you want to be some kind ofwriter slash director slash actorthen march your ass out of here andgo straight to film school. Once

(CONTINUED)



Michael Dong 8.

MICHAELyou pay your tuition, they willindulge your asinine notion ofbeing some kind of triple threat.

ORSON

I didn’t mean to sound naive...

MICHAELListen...people like you are adime-a-dozen in Hollywood. Young,good looking, probably the mostpopular kids in theirhometown. Their heads are full ofsmall town idealism and everyoneback home has told them how greatthey are their entire life...sowith delusions of grandeur, theycome out here to become...

(makes air quotes)"big stars". But when they get outhere, they realize that there arethousands of others just like themand none of them will ever findmeaningful work inentertainment. The ones withself-esteem will wait tables whileliving denial that they aretalentless hacks and the oneswithout self-esteem will work ontheir craft doing porn in thevalley!

ORSONDamn...my dad said you might be alittle intense but I didn’t thinkyou’d be this abrasive.

MICHAELAbrasive? You think I’mabrasive? I’m a motherfuckingrealist! I tell you I think youmight have some skills as a writerand the next thing you say is youwant to direct and act in the

fucking script! All three of thosejobs are insanely complex andhighly competitive but you’re Orsonfucking Welles, so why not let youdo everything under the sun!

(CONTINUED)



Michael Dong 9.

ORSONOkay...I’m sorry, sir. I didn’tmean to offend...

MICHAEL(interrupting him)

And stop calling me "sir". Thatpoliteness is useless and peoplewill either think you’re an asskisser or a chump if you call them"sir" all the time.

ORSONGot it. Again, I apologize for themisunderstanding.

MICHAELIt’s okay, Orson. I know I mightseem like a hard ass but do you

want an agent like me or some pussythat kisses your ass and tells youonly what you want to hear?

ORSONI totally understand...so what areyour final thoughts on CitizenKane?

MICHAELI’m not a miracle worker...like Isaid before, it’s a tough sell. Itmight be useful as a spec to help

land you a writing job but I’m notsure if I can find a buyer forthis.

ORSONI understand, Michael. Thanksagain for taking this meeting.

They both stand up and shake hands across the desk. Orsonturns and walks out of the office.

SUPER:

Several days later



10.

EXT. MENTOR’S BAR - DAY

The sign that adorns the doorway has small cursive scriptletters that read, "Meet me at" and in a larger font below"Mentor’s". The sign and the outside of the buildingindicate that this bar has been around since the mid-20thcentury.

INT. MENTOR’S BAR - DAY

It is late afternoon and people in work attire fill the barfor post-work libations. JACK MENTOR, a heavy-set 63 yearold man, is stocking bottles of liquor on the shelf behindthe bar.

The front door of the bar opens. Jack looks up andrecognizes Orson walking in.

JACK

Orson! How are you doing today?

ORSON(sitting down at the bar)

I’m hanging in there. How are you,Jack?

JACKSame as I ever was. What can I getfor you?

ORSONGrey Goose and soda with a couplelimes.

JACK(makes Orson’s drink)

Last time you were in here, youtold me that you had a meeting withan agent. How did it go?

ORSONIt was alright, I guess. On onehand, he told me I had skills aswriter but on the other hand, he

admitted he didn’t even read myscript.

JACKYeah. As soon as you understandthat the entertainment industry isbased on half-truths and outrightlies, the sooner you’ll be tomaking it...

(CONTINUED)



Michael Dong 11.

(beat)or you wise up and run screamingback to where your from.

ORSONYou’re joking, right?

JACKYes and no. I wish I could tellyou that if you work hard that thedoors to success will open for youbut that’s not the way things work.

ORSONI’m beginning to understand that.

JACKYears ago, I had a customer who waslike you except he was an aspiring

actor. He had an agent but monthsand months went by without gettingany auditions. One day, his agenttold him, I don’t have any actingjobs but I have one for a make-upartist.

ORSONSo what happened?

JACKHis agent told him to make a fakeresume with fake make-up credits

for small films and theatricalwork. He told him to go buy atackle box used for fishing becauseevery make-up artist has one.

ORSONNo way.

JACKHis agent said they would look athis resume and he would be told hewasn’t right for the job. Whenthat happened, he was instructed tojump up and say, "I can do anymake-up you want! Call yoursecretary in here and I will do anytype of make-up on her!" Theyliked his attitude so he got thejob.

(CONTINUED)



Michael Dong 12.

ORSONWhat did he do without any make-upexperience?

JACKWell...he called his agent and

asked the same thing. His agenttold him to go buy as many books ashe could find on make-up and figureit out. That was his first job inthe business and he went on tobecome Vice President of Post-Production at Paramount.

ORSONSo the moral of the story isbullshit your way until you makeit?

JACKNo. The moral of the story isattitude is everything in thisbusiness. The agent who thinksyou’re a good writer through hisown methodology without readingyour script...that is all based onhis attitude from his years ofexperience.

Orson’s phone starts ringing on the bar. He picks it up tosee who is calling.

ORSONSpeak of the devil...he’s callingright now.

JACKGo ahead. Answer it.

Orson steps outside to answer his phone.

EXT. MENTOR’S BAR - DAY

Orson walks on the sidewalk outside the bar avoiding ahandful of patrons who are smoking cigarettes.

ORSONHello, Michael?



13.

INT. MICHAEL’S CAR - DAY

Michael is driving in a BMW 7 Series car on a freeway in LosAngeles. He is speaking on a hands-free speaker phoneinside his car.

MICHAELWho do you love?

ORSON (V.O.)What?

MICHAELWho do you love?

ORSON (V.O.)Seriously? My mom, my dad. What’sthis about?

MICHAELI’ll tell you who you love...YOULOVE ME! I sold Citizen Kane!

ORSON (V.O.)What? How? Are you kidding me?

MICHAELIt was really an accidentalpitch. I was in a meeting and thestudio passed on everything else Ihad and I jokingly pitched CitizenKane so I could at least close the

meeting with a few laughs...andthey loved it!

ORSON (V.O.)I don’t know what to say,Michael! You fucking rock! Ican’t believe you sold my script!

MICHAELI can only get you mid-six figuressince you’re a first time writerbut come in to ATA tomorrow so wecan take care of the contractualbusiness. I set-up a meeting nextweek with the studio. They want meto help package the script with ATAtalent to get this on the fasttrack.

(CONTINUED)



Michael Dong 14.

ORSON (V.O.)Wow. This is all happening soquick. I can’t thank youenough. I guess you’re a miracleworker after all.

MICHAELIf they’re paying, I am playing...Let’s go make Citizen Kane!

INT. STUDIO CONFERENCE ROOM - DAY

LESLIE ISSA, a 44 year old studio executive impeccablydressed in a pleated skirt and a designer blouse and AARONROBERTS, a 52 year old executive dressed casually in jeansand a polo shirt are sitting at a meeting table in theconference room of the studio’s main production office.

Michael and Orson enter the room escorted by a productionassistant. Leslie and Aaron both stand up to greet them.

LESLIEMichael, so good to see you again.

MICHAEL(walks over a gives her a hug)

Looking great as ever, Leslie.

LESLIEAnd you must be Orson, pleased tomeet you.

(extending her hand to Orson)My name is Leslie Issa.

ORSONNice to meet you, Leslie.

LESLIEAnd this is Aaron Roberts.

AARON(reaches to shake his hand)

How you doing, Orson? Michaeltells me you’re the hot new writerat ATA.

ORSON(modestly)

I don’t know about that. Pleasedto meet you, Aaron.

(CONTINUED)



Michael Dong 15.

LESLIEWhy don’t we sit down and getstarted?

Everyone sits down at the conference table. Each one has ascript in front of them.

LESLIESo Orson...we really love yourscript and we are happy to bedeveloping it for the studio. Asit’s written now, it’s a nicelittle movie but we have some ideason how we can pump it up into areal four-quadrant tent polemovie. Aaron, why don’t you start.

AARONI guess we should start with the

beginning. The opening done as anewsreel is pretty good but what ifwe got Mary Hart to do anEntertainment Tonight styleopening?

LESLIEOr we could even do a throwback andget Robin Leach to do somethinglike "The Lifestyles of the Richand Famous"

MICHAEL

I like that! I’m sure we can getLeach on the cheap. He hasn’tworked on anything since he hostedthe Surreal Life.

ORSONI’m okay with that. The newsreelidea is a little dated.

LESLIEGood, good. Next, what if CharlesKane takes over a televisionnetwork instead of a newspaper?

AARONYou see newspapers are a dyingmedium and we think it would bestronger if his business was intelevision over being a newspaperpublisher.

(CONTINUED)



Michael Dong 16.

LESLIEKane can still be involved in thenetwork’s news division so itshould be easy to maintain thoseelements from your original script.

ORSON

Okay...I guess that could work.

LESLIEGreat. Now the scene after Kanehires away his competition’s newsreporters in the newsroom with thechorus girls...cute idea, kind ofquirky but what if we change it alittle bit.

ORSONWhat do you have in mind?

LESLIEI am thinking that Kane rents out anightclub instead and then he hiresa rock band to perform?

MICHAELHow about the Pussycat Dolls? ATArepresents them and we could getthem to write some original musicthat we could package into thesoundtrack.

AARON

Excellent, Michael!

ORSONWow. A soundtrack. I neverimagined a soundtrack for CitizenKane, let alone one with thePussycat Dolls.

AARONGotta have one, Orson. Anyadditional revenue streams that areavailable, we gotta jump all over.

LESLIEWhile we are talking about music,we really should discuss thecharacter of SusanAlexander. Having her be astruggling opera singer doesn’treally work for me.

(CONTINUED)



Michael Dong 17.

AARONYeah...opera doesn’t help us marketthis film to any demographic undersixty. What if she was a singer ona show like American Idol that wason Kane’s television network?

LESLIEAnd then there could be a scandalwhere Kane tries to crown her thewinner.

MICHAELThat’s a great idea and it gives usanother opportunity to package somemore musical acts into the film.

ORSONThat’s a pretty significant change

but I guess I can work with it.

LESLIESo finally...I want to talk aboutthe whole "rosebud was a sled"ending.

MICHAELWhat are you thinking? A productplacement deal with Radio Flyer?

LESLIENo, no...actually I was thinking

more out-of-the-box on thisone. Orson, your ending is kind ofcold and depressing. What ifinstead of a sled...rosebud wasdog.

AARONWhat kind of dog?

LESLIEI was thinking of a bordercollie...maybe even a puppy.

AARONEven better. I love it.

LESLIENow stay with me...instead of thefinal scene with the sled beingthrown in the furnace, we have afinal flashback. It starts with a

(CONTINUED)



Michael Dong 18.

LESLIEclose-up on a dog tag that has thename "Rosebud" and then the camerapulls out to reveal the cutestborder collie puppy running on asummer day in Colorado into the

arms of a young Charles FosterKane. Audiences will love it.

MICHAELFucking Genius. What do you think,Orson?

ORSONWhat do I think? I think it soundsterrible! I think all the ideas Ihave heard today will ruin thisfilm!

MICHAELWhoa, kid. Calm down!

ORSONNo! I have sat here holding mytongue while I listen to thesenotes and I can’t take itanymore! I can’t for the life ofme understand how any of you canpossibly think these changes willmake this a better film!

LESLIE

(with a tone of arrogance)I’ll have you know that our studiohas had the highest box officegross for the past three years so Ithink we know how to make asuccessful film.

AARONI hate to break it to you, Orsonbut we’ll do whatever we want tothis script. If our market researchtells us that audiences want a filmabout a pre-op transvestite thenwill make Charles Foster Kane be a"chick with a dick".

ORSON(with his face buried in hishands)

This is unbelievable!

(CONTINUED)



Michael Dong 19.

AARONAnd furthermore...you can eithermake the changes or we’ll getanother writer to make the changesthat we want. At the end of theday, we own Citizen Kane and yourinput from this point forward is

neither necessary orrequired. This meeting is done.

Aaron and Leslie gather their belongings and exit theroom. Michael stands up a begins walking towards the dooras he is about to leave, he turns to Orson.

MICHAELNice going, kid. You couldn’t playthe game for one single meeting andyou sabotaged your career before iteven began.

Michael walks away before Orson can say a word. A dejectedOrson sits alone at the table.

INT. MENTOR’S BAR - DAY

The bar is practically empty except for a couple sitting ata back table and Orson who is sitting at the bar. Jack iswashing glasses behind the bar.

ORSONI can’t believe how quickly thingscan change. After selling my

script, I was on top of the worldand now I’m completely miserable.

JACKThat’s the entertainment businessfor you, Orson. High highs andlower lows.

ORSONI just feel like I wrote an amazingscreenplay and I sold it to bunchof assholes who have no respect formy vision.

JACKOrson, you got to know when to letgo and know what battles to walkaway from. You put your heart andsoul into Citizen Kane and that’swhat makes it so painful right now.

(CONTINUED)



Michael Dong 20.

ORSONIt’s a tough pill to swallowbecause I really thought CitizenKane was going a great Americanfilm that would established mycareer and put me on the map.

JACKSnap out of it, Orson and stopfeeling sorry for yourself! Icould line up a million people whowould trade places with you in aheartbeat! You sold your firstscreenplay and you should beecstatic about it! You got to getover being depressed about yourvision being compromised becausethis is par for the course inHollywood!

ORSONI guess you’re right, Jack.

JACKI know I’m right...this one is outof your hands now but at least yougot a nice paycheck. Go out andget drunk, get laid and celebratethis moment as a victory...itshould be a high point in your lifeinstead of one that leaves youlooking like a sorry sack of

shit. Besides you’re still young,you got time to write another greatscreenplay.

FADE TO BLACK:

SUPER:In memory of Gregg, Jimmy and mybrother, David. When looking inthe eyes of death, laugh in hisface because you only live once.

FADE OUT:

THE END

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Rosebud Was a Dog