8/10/2019 REVIEW SoFi Caf South Beach

1/4

MIAMI MIRROR TRUE REFLECTIONS

Page 1 of 4

SoFi Caf500 South Pointe Drive305-763-8692 Delivery

22 December 2014

By David Arthur WaltersTHE MIAMI MIRROR

The Holidays are a sad time for many people because they are supposed to be happy and arenot very happy at all. They may feel sorry for themselves because they do not have family orgood friends, not understanding, because they do not have them, that some of the unhappiestpeople in the world do have them.

The tragedy is worse for the lonely in big cities like New York when the winter is cold and dark.Sad sacks are advised to treat themselves to sunny climes. I consider myself fortunate to live inSouth Beach year around. It is a great tourist trap for me because it is a beautiful place, and Icannot afford to get out of it.

Still nothing is perfect, so perfect that sometimes I long for nothingness. My occasion for sadsackness this Happy Holiday Season is that my only friend who lives here turned down myinvitation to lunch at the SoFi Caf in the elegant South of Fifth district. I should not haveinformed her that the SoFi Caf is a very casual, healthy food establishment, with an attractivelunch special, my intention being to let her know that she would not have to wear Dior and

8/10/2019 REVIEW SoFi Caf South Beach

2/4

MIAMI MIRROR TRUE REFLECTIONS

Page 2 of 4

Ferragamo and the like. She demurred, saying that as a Republican finishing school graduate,she would fain wait for a China plate opportunity.

Needless to say, she would have been jarred by the water jar the attentive waitress placed onthe table immediately after I sat down. Needless to say, I felt as blue as the hue the absurdglass reflected from the environs, which included a surfboard on one wall!

Little did my best friend know that the upper crust from up north habituate SoFi Caf. Youwould never know it because the most of them are down dressers. They recognize one anotherby secret brand coding. A woman might be wearing $15,000 and only her casual peers wouldknow it. If the owners of the very casual caf knew it, they might raise the prices, whichhappen to be very modest for the booming South of Fifth district of South Beach. That is lastthing discreet clientele would want to happen, not because they could not afford it, butbecause the place would be flooded with indiscreet people. Remember how the Yuppiesinvaded all those cool retreats in the city?

8/10/2019 REVIEW SoFi Caf South Beach

3/4

MIAMI MIRROR TRUE REFLECTIONS

Page 3 of 4

I brought along Musils The Man Without Qualities for company.

Two selves that know how questionable the self is nowadays hold on to each other, saidUlrich, the man without qualities.

I was surprised the $19.85 lunch special I opted for included a bottle of Peroni beer. Howgenerous, given the rent around here! I said to the server , who plunked it down along with aNumber 31 sign, something else that would have mortified by absent friend.

Thirty one? I asked in mocked horror at the gaucheness.

A lucky number for her, she said, as she was born January 31. Well, I was born January 9, I said.So we have the characteristics of a two-faced goat and a new age dreamed up by potheads, butdo not count on your astrological qualities, I said, because modern astronomers havediscovered miscalculations. Oh? So who are we? Darned if I know who or what I am or where I

belong, as I do not have any qualities.

With that I got down to business. The menu offered smoothies, acai bowls, fruit drinks withhealthy stuff mixed in, wraps, sandwiches, salads, pancakes, quinoa rice bowls, veggie andturkey burgers, and so on.

The $19.95 Special has a choice of crab cakes, caesar salad, or power salad appetizer, with achoice of mahi mahi, salmon, chicken breast as the main course, with sides of mashed potatoesor brown rice and vegetables.

I chose the power salad, and the salm on to compare it with my missing friends salmon. Sheloves to cook, and happens to be one of the best cooks on South Beach, at home of course.

8/10/2019 REVIEW SoFi Caf South Beach

4/4

MIAMI MIRROR TRUE REFLECTIONS

Page 4 of 4

The food was so excellent that I sent my compliments to the chef. Of course nothing is perfectalthough this is the best of all possible worlds at the moment. There must be things for peopleto complain about so civilization can advance to absolute utopia. Dessert should be included inthe $19.95 Special. Still, I was satisfied, and a little tipsy from Peroni to boot, nearly hypnotized

into bliss by the spinning crane on the construction site outside.

-XYX-