RELATIONSHIPS WITH PARENTS

1. What does RBA stand for?2. Give an example of a deposit.3. Give an example of a withdrawal.4. What are the three C’s to relationships.5. Name 3 of the 6 ways to build strong families. (If

you name all 6 you’ll get extra credit).Extra Credit: Give a tradition you do in your family that you like. If you don’t have one, write down a tradition that you will have in a future family.

QUIZ

Describe your relationship with your parents. Do you get along with your mom? Your dad? Do you confide in them when needed? Do feel like you have a strong bond with your mom/dad?

JOURNAL

How can you practice these skills with your parents?

COOPERATION AND COMPROMISE

What are some deposits we can make in the relationship bank account?

What are some withdrawals from the relationship bank account?

PARENT RELATIONSHIP BANK ACCOUNT

MY DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE

What does independence mean?How do you gain or lose independence?The basic reasons for struggles related to

independence with teens and parents are:FreedomControlPower

MY DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE

What is the relationship of independence between individuals and families?

How is independence tied to responsibility?

Independence does not mean that we don’t need others.

MY DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE

Independence = Freedom, Control, Power

If independence is freedom, what are you free from? Free to do?

If independence is control, what do you have control of?

If independence is power, what kind of power? What or whom do you have power over?

FREEDOM AND RESPONSIBILITY

Most teens view freedom as being free from the restrictions of parents.

The images that this brings is being free from any restrictions and rules.

This type of belief is unrealistic.

FREEDOM AND RESPONSIBILITY

“Freedom to…” is a much better concept:Freedom to actFreedom to make your own choices

Freedom to be yourself In this case, freedom and responsibility go hand-in-

hand.The playwright, George Bernard Shaw once said,

“Liberty means responsibility. That is why most men dread it!”

FREEDOM AND RESPONSIBILITY

Define Freedom:The power to gain responsibility over one’s own life.

Increased freedom brings increased responsibility. Increased responsibility brings increased freedom.

MULTIPLE ROLES OF PARENTS

What’s hard about being a parent?What’s hard about being an adult child of an older

parent?What’s hard about being the parent of a teenager?Parents were once teenagers too. You many be the

parent of a teenager someday!

10. Recognize how hard raising a child is.9. Seek your parents’ advice and ask their opinions on hard things8. Blood really is thicker than water. Your family will always be there.7. The less you push your parents for something, the better your chances are for getting what you want.6. You’ll be respected only when you respect them.5. Nothing good comes from fighting with you parents and being against them.4. Help around the house.3. Do not underestimate their ideas and advice.2. Do your homework, buy them flowers, and save money.1. Your parents don’t always have a reason.

TOP 10 THINGS YOU OUGHTA KNOW ABOUT PARENTS

STRESS RELIEVER OR STRESS GIVER?

Are you a stress reliever or a stress giver?Do you try to help your parents in situations?Or do you cause more problems?

METHODS OF COMMUNICATION

Mature communication stylesConflict resolutionResolving conflict with integrity

MATURE COMMUNICATION STYLE

A childish answer can elicit a childish response:If you yell and throw tantrums, others may yell and throw tantrums back.

The goal is to get two individuals on the adult level of communication.

If you want to be treated like an adult, then act like one…really!

Which style of communication should we use to communicate with our parents? (Passive, Aggressive or Assertive)

CONFLICT RESOLUTION

How to win with parents tips:Don’t bring up a problem when parents are busy.

When a favor is wanted, ask for it—don’t tell.Stick to only one problem at a time.Never say, “All my friends…”

CONFLICT RESOLUTION

Always ask parents before making plans.

Do not be sarcastic.Shouting is seldom convincing and only leads to accelerated confrontation.

It is hard to carry on a meaningful. conversation when composure is lost.

Inaccurate accusations never help.

RESOLVING CONFLICT WITH INTEGRITY

Family members should be able to have differences of opinions and ideas without the conflict.

Family Feud Activity

SUMMARY

Teenagers will always struggle to find their independence. Just remember, increased freedom = increased responsibility.

Parents have many roles to fulfill. Make sure you are part of the solution and not the problem.

Choose effective methods of communication with your parents.

Homework: “How Well Do You Know Your Parents?” Due next class period.