WhenTheWorldIsRunningDownYouMakeTheBestOfWhat’sStillAround

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March / April 2010| ISSUE 4 |

Your opportunity to help...

...is Right About Now.

http://ran4.us/rtt-2010PHOTO: MARIO TAMA / GETTY IMAGES

THE MUSIC ISSUEShagadelic. Yeah Baby!What’s Fat and Blue and Almost Famous?Shamisen on SpeedBad to the Bone ZeroMichael Wade is a SchizoVinnie Vintage Spits FireUnsound Unraveledand more...

Hope, Prayer and LoveEven though Japan is a country wherenatural disaster is always right around thecorner, how do Japanese respond to disasterwhen it strikes unfamiliar places?J7 sat down with a local Haitian to guagethe response on the street here.

No Hope for Haiti?

Bleeding PinkPink Eiga in the afternoon

Nana CafeYou want an underage girl with your coffee?

A Gathering of Penises

Crossword PuzzleCheck out this cultural crossword from Power English.

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The Green SpotTrapped in a Plastic Bubble

Deadly’s TipsSound and Silence

When In RomeForeign Dudes Suck

RAN RecommendsIf we eat it, see it, listen to it, buy it, go to it, and we love it, then we think you will too.

TasteCasablanca

Should I Stay or Should I GoJPN 4 LYFE bitches!!

FashionBoost your Eye-Q

RAN ZOOWe couldn’t get away with saying shit like this, but animals can.

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COVER PHOTO: LARRY DEFELIPPITABLE OF CONTENTS PHOTO: ACHIM RUNNEBAUM

CONTENTSMarch / April 2010 - ISSUE NO. 4

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Publisher: TD HouchenChief Editor: Jason L. GatewoodPhotography Editor: Achim RunnebaumCheif designer: Adrien SanbornIllustrator - designer:Adam Pasion

Send story ideas to:editor@ranmagazine.comSend photography and illustration to: asanborn@ranmagazine.comTo advertise, contact:ad-sales@ranmagazine.comPromotional Events/Co-Promotion:trevlove1@ranmagazine.com

www.ranmagazine.com

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On the cover of our second issue, we told you Nagoya Rocks! –There was a reason behind this not-so-subtle proclamation--music is pouring out of the pavement

in our fair city-everywhere you go you can hear it practically coming from the sidewalks and trees and rocks in the parks.

Whether it’s super-explosive Jet Shamisen notes ringing out in Sakae, golden guitar chords swirling around Kanayama Station at midnight, percussive hip-hop drum beats thumping under the bridge at Wakamiya Dori, or dope bluesy rock making you nod your head in Central Park, there is no doubt that Nagoya is a musical city—and all that is just what’s going on in the street.

In our fourth issue out, we’re exploring the musician’s soul here in Nagoya. We’ve got a sick-ass intro to some of the folks here in the Nag who are making themselves heard, word. Of course, there are tons more musos in the area, we don’t claim to know them all, but these are a few. My man Mike Wade is a screaming demon when you see his alter ego ‘STONEY’ live..Vin spits fire every single time, and if you’re a blues man, Takashi has your licks…DJs, rock

bands, acoustic balladeers, soul-shakin’ RnB, emo, techno, dubstep, drumandbass, reggae, house, thrash, funked up rock, whatever your pleasure musically, we’re telling you man, NAGOYA FRICKIN’ ROCKS.

On March 5th, at the Hard Rock Café, you can check out some of Nag’s best gaijin superstar musicians in our benefit show for Haiti. It’s called ROCK THIS TOWN -and that is exactly what will happen on that very same evening. You need to be there to support not only the musos here who are digging in their souls for you, but also to help support the folks who are displaced and whose lives have been shattered by disaster and catastrophe in Haiti. It can happen anywhere, anytime, and we all get by with a little help from our friends.

Support the scene. Support art. Support your friends. Support RAN. Support each other. This is part of our “message” at RAN, if we’ve got to have one…the streets of Nagoya are alive with the sound of Music.

Is everybody IN?tdh

BAND PICTURED: TOMO FRIENDS

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| By Larry Defelippi |

The unbearable

Tomo Shagger Band Examined

The Tomo Shagger Tribute Band hail from a tradition of bluesy riffs and ramshackle lyrics of 60’s British rock bringing to mind The Kinks, The Yardbirds and The

Stones.....or not. Tomo ,the lead singer of the band, has it that he is indeed channeling Elvis....his accent, his moves, his style et al... Not Jagger at all... But if indeed he is the Japanese personification of Elvis (and I thought that was Former PM Junichiro Koizumi), then he is a boy, strike that-- man, from Gifu channeling Elvis who in turn is channeling Mick Jagger with some James Brown thrown in for good measure...Testicles included. Enough there to give Kundera a moment’s pause of thought. Behind our iconic lead singer Tomo are four gaijin whose playing is as tight as a 13-year-old Mandy Smith. To see them play is to know, to put it quite simply, that the Tomo Shagger Tribute band are one of the best rock bands out there in Nags.

RAN: Let’s start with a round of band member intros.James: I’m James...I’m from England...I’ve been in Japan for seven years...I’m eating a big fuck off salad...and I play bass.Mitch: Mitch from Texas..I’ve been in the band for about a year and a half now...plus another year I was in the band before...another incarnation of the...uh...I was in the Marmites.James: I’ve been in the band longer than I’ve been in Japan...longer than I’ve been alive.Mitch: You’ve been a Marmite...You’ve been a Shagger...James: I was created from Marmite....Mitch: So yeah...Mitch from Texas...I play guitar.Sam: I’m Sam from England...I play the drums. I met Tomo in a bar on a night out. He recruited me into the Shagger band...Tomo: This is Tomo. I’ve been in Japan a long time. I’ve spent all my life in Gifu and Nagoya.RAN: Aren’t you a lonely old boy from Gifu? From what I hear.Tomo: Boy?RAN: A lonely old boy.Tomo: Boy?James: Just agree with everything

he says.RAN: That was the piece you gave me. It said ‘ I’m a lonely old boy from Gifu’.Tomo: Oh yeah..yeah...absolutely...I’m just a lonely man....RAN: You’re a man now...Tomo: This old boy getting lonely...Ben: I’m Ben from Australia and I believe in the healing power of rock’n’roll.RAN: Let’s jump into musical influences. What music has influenced you?Tomo: I like Elvis a lot. I stole his accent..RAN: Elvis Presley? He would’ve spoken with an American accent...Tomo: Yeah....he was an AmericanRAN: I kinda saw you as Jagger-esque...but actually Presely....like a slim Elvis Presely...before he got fatTomo: Absolutely.....Yeah....I like him...I like him a lot.Sam: You channel Elvis...Mitch: We all like James Brown..Tomo: I have his soul as well....I stole it after he died...James: You have his testicles as well.....In your cupboard...in a jar.RAN: I was hoping to segue into a Stones question....so I’m going to do it anyway....even though....Mitch: It’s the elephant in the room.RAN: It is basically. I was going to put it out there that The Yard Birds are far more influential musically than The Stones....not that there is any Stones influence going on here.Tomo: I agree.RAN: You’re meant to disagree with me..Mitch: What would be your argument?RAN: Just saying we have Jimmy Page, Clapton...we have Beck...three of the greatest guitarists of all time that came out of The Yardbirds....The Stones gave us Bill Wyman....James: The Stones made more money.Sam: Maybe they have more fun.James: They have naked girls on the aeroplane.Tomo: Ever since they’ve been playing...they’ve been singing a song called Money...money don’t buy everything it’s true.....PH

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Nick Edges (stereophonic)they know it’s true...they are very down to earth. They are very rich....yet they can’t be satisfied.James: Tomo...you’ve always said how you like how the Stones have stayed together for so long....and they’ve kept on going....a lot of bands fall apart...they have disagreements....break ups...The Rolling Stones stayed together...They’re a unit...It’s what Tomo preaches here as well. He keeps us together.RAN: A lot of bands just broke up because they became shit and no one wants to listen to them anymore.James: I don’t know....they seem to rise above that....they might realize that they are not the most cutting edge...they are just having fun....they have the opportunity and they are going to enjoy it.RAN: How do you feel about amateur archaeology as a band?

Everyone: (Silence)RAN: There is a good reason or perhaps not that I asked this....archaeology...Its probably unknown to many people....but Bill Wyman has his own brand of signature metal detectors.Mitch: That’s right...I knew that....He’s really into that.RAN: And he’s one of the top living sex legends of all time....number 4 after Tomo Shagger....So if the Tomo Shagger Tribute Band were going to endorse a product...What would you like to see the Tomo Shagger name on?James: What would we brand?Mitch: Styling wax...We could endorse lipstick....different shades...James: We could have a funeral parlor as well....A Tomo Shagger Funeral parlor...RAN: Shagged to death....that’s lovely...that’s where I want to be interned after my death.Tomo: We would endorse rock n’ roll.RAN: How rock n’ roll is it being a ‘Shagger’?James: Very.RAN: Yours is very rock n’ roll....you have that fuck off chicken salad thing going on...James: Yeah....I just don’t stop....Tomo: I like to do my rock n’ rolling on my bed... While I’m taking my socks off... That’s as rock n’ roll as I get.

RAN: That’s a very sexy image of you...Mitch: Whilst wearing lipstick...Tomo: The night is fantastic.RAN: You mostly write your own materialTomo: Yeah...RAN: But you refuse to do any Stones covers?Mitch: We do some covers... but no Stones covers.Ben: We’ve probably done covers that they’ve done.Tomo: In a way we are covering satisfaction.James: Rolling Stones step aside.....Tomo Shagger rises above...RAN: If you had just one album and one only?Mitch: For my one album It’d have to be Who’s Next... It’s one of those albums I always come back to... I was a huge fan when I was younger.

James: The four people I’ve listened to most and I’m sure I’ll listen to forever more... are Gil Scott-Heron, Nick Drake, Tom Waits and James Brown.Sam: I don’t know about the album but I’d have a CD full of songs by The Meters...A funk band from New Orleans.Ben: Swordfishtrombones by Tom Waits....always sticks in my mind as the one.Tomo: I love all the great musicians from the fifties to the seventies... I particularly love the Junior Wells album Hoodoo Man Blues... I just want to make that sound.RAN: What is that you want as a band?Tomo: Why can’t there be a Japanese rock’n’roller? ...I want to see that. People know how to rock not how to roll... I wanna bring this to the people.Sam: Everyone to have a good time.James: People dancing like loons.Mitch: Just have fun.Ben: To entertain.Tomo: I want me some donuts on the bed.

We know you’d be up for a Shag--check out their tunes on their Myspace page:

http://www.myspace.com/tomoshaggerband

Born in the UK, Nick grew-up when the UK underground scene reached a critical mass - raves were being shut down left right

and center and the club boom hit off. What was underground now became mainstream and he had tickets for it all, spending his misspent youth on a keen diet of clubbing and what was now illegal raving.

On arrival to Japan Nick Edges spent his first 5 years running one of the top clubs in Hamamatsu, Shizuoka. With his move to Nagoya, he met Babur Mogul another keen-minded DJ/Promoter with an unstoppable desire to push something new in Japan leading to the formation of the event and promotion group Stereophonic. Since its creation the group continues to bring something new and fresh to the clubbers of central Japan with their simple approach of good music and unforgettable nights, be it show casing the local talent or flying in International artists such as Danny Howells.

The success and reputation of Stereophonic has lead in the past to Nick and the team working with reputable UK label Defected, Japan’s No.1 online music store Wasabeat, support from in-ternational companies like Zima & Chivas and producing the yearly renowned 3 venue mega-party “The Absolute Halloween”. Edges has also had the pleasure of working with many

nightclubs and other events such as “Smash” with resident Dj/Producer Ogawa, to bring artists like John Digweed, Jim Rivers and Hernan Cattaneo to the region.

Overseas has seen Nick on the white island of Ibiza playing at the legendary Bar M, the Orange Corner and Koolwaters Pool Party in San Antonio, before having the opportunity to DJ alongside UK’s Deepgroove and Marc Vedo at the 5,000 capacity mega-club Eden in summer 2008.

You can find Nick Edges playing in Nagoya at Stereophonic parties held at Club JB’s which was ranked in the top 100 clubs in the world by DJ Mag in 2009 or at other events and venues around the region and beyond

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Nick Edges (stereophonic)

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/ pages/Nagoya-Japan/ StereophonicProductions/ 30554153542?ref=ts

Bookings: stereophonicjapam

@gmail.com

I’d like to lead an honorable life, to dam up the flow of decline on our Japanese musical traditions. Sometimes I think my weapon of choice, the Shamisen isn’t “cool”

enough... It’s a traditional instrument, but I’ve chosen it... So I have to use what I’ve chosen.

I started out 10 years ago in Kanayama, you know... The south side of Kanayama station where a lot of musicians play. I had no skill. zero. But I didn’t care, I just played with reckless abandon. It really didn’t matter; the professional shamisen players would show up there, pack away ¥20,000 in tips each day, and I would be left with scraps.

So I decided to head up to Tokyo--I may have played every train station there! I crashed at my friend’s place whenever I needed to sleep, but I played all the time--rain or shine, cold or hot, to crowds, or nobody at all. I just kept playing. I really had no plan. I just played to increase my skill level... I couldn’t help myself.

One day a woman I was fooling around with says, “ I can’t make love with you!”

“Why?”, I asked.“Your shamisen is too strong... It makes your

love-making bad... You have to be gentle sometimes too. Both with shamisen playing and love-making...”

I couldn’t understand what she was saying; I was still a young man in attack mode! I’d make my shamisen scream and cry out... We were both rough, and liked to make the crowds jump and flinch. This became the basis for the style I’m known for today.

One day I was invited by a friend to play at a club known for techno. I took one listen, and was inspired; I found myself prisoner in the digital music world, and I liked it. I wanted to fuse the sound of the shamisen with this type of music.

It was me freestyling; there hadn’t been anything like this style before. But I also noticed that my skill hadn’t increased. Sure I could play, but I couldn’t seem to follow the music organically. I thought I was finished, nothing worse than an almost-has-been in music. So I decided to come back to Nagoya to see some old friends. One friend heard my new sound and said it was really good, that I should continue trying to refine this style. Then I remembered my old flame’s words, “be gentle.” So I did, and became Electric Jet Shamisen.

I started playing back here in Nagoya, playing with no shirt on on the street. I was able to land a gig in a few TV ads, make some CDs. These days though, I play one day at a time... If I come up with something better, then I’ll do it, but for now I’m the Jet Shamisen.

Shamisen on Speed

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Check out Jet Shamisen online:

http://ran4.us/jet-shamisen

Shamisen on Speed

Name: Takashi TeradaAge: 24Birthplace: NagoyaStyle: Blues, Classic RockInfluences: Jimi Hendrix, Chet Atkins, Jimmy Page, Stevie Ray Vaughn, BB King, Buddy Guy

Why did you pick up a guitar in the first place?: “I thought the American band KISS was cool, my friends played J Pop, which was just chords, I wanted to play notes and blues riffs, I wanted to feel the music more…”Why do you enjoy playing with non-Japanese?: “Playing with gaijin is really interesting and fun, the feeling is different, they have more feeling, [conversely] playing with Japanese is quiet and polite..”Where is your favorite place to play in Nagoya?: “Hard Rock Café, because it’s Rock-n-Roll.”Dream Gig?: “I want to play around the world.”

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Government name: MR. K.P. ADU

Artist name: VINNY VINTAGE

Place of birth: MISSISSAUGA, CANADA

How long in nagoya music?: about 1 1/2 yrs

Style: What is produced when hip hop has intercourse with other genre.

Music influences: A long list. But just to name a few: James Brown,Michael Jackson, Bob Marley, The Beatles, Sade, Lucky Dube, Lau-ryn Hill, Kool Moe Dee, Quincy Jones, Dr. Dre, Timbaland, etc...

Music goals: to express myself and send out messages to everyone in the world until i am no more.

Upcoming gigs: there will be many as soon as i am done recording my album.

Favorite artist/why?: In the hip hop category I’d say Biggie Smalls, Tupac, Nas, Jay Z, Kool G Rap, Busta Rhymes, Eminem, Kanye West and 50 cent. They wrote songs that have unique flows, great delivery with many subliminal messages.

Best nagoya moment thus far: performing at the maddlovely springfest 08 was one. becoming one of Japan’s most wanted and surviving it was another.

If not nagoya, where and why?:Toronto...cause there’s no place like home.

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emceethe pureemcee

Government name: Michael William Wade

Performer name: Michael William Wade, Michael William

Place of Birth: Hollywood, California

How long you been in Nagoya?: 5 1/2 years

How long you plan to stay?: As long as I’m happy.

Day job: School Teacher

Musical influences: Elvis, Aerosmith, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Eric Clapton, Waylon Jennings, Rob Thomas, Dave Wallace, David Crosby.

Musical goals: To keep playing live as long as people enjoy my gigs.

Favorite artist(s): Linkin Park, Rob Thomas, David Crosby, Garth Brooks

Best Nagoya moment: 8/4/04: The day I fell in love unconditionally for the first time.

Worst: The first time I tried natto, even worse, the second time.

If not Nagoya, where?: Living in the tropics. Beach, sun, sand, beer, guitar…Heaven!

Performer name Johnny Stone ( Stoney )”

Place of Birth uknown

How long U been in Nagoya? 2 months

How long u plan to stay?

When the yellow fever breaks I’m gone.

Day job What day joB?

Musical inFLuences Robert Plant, Elvis, James

Brown, Jim Morrison, Steven Tyler, Axl Rose, Bono,

David Lee Roth, Jerry Lee Lewis, Trent Reznor,

Ozzy, Mick Jagger, Freddie Mercury, Otis Redding,

Frank ZappaMusical goals World Tour

Favorite artists Linkin Park, Aerosmith, Van Halen

Best Nagoya moment thus far Becoming Stoney .

At that moment I realized I was a proper

entertainer. The stage was mine.

Worst None thus far.

If u weren’t in Nagoya, where would u rather

be and why? Los Angeles.

24 hours in LA Snowboard in the morning Dodger

game in the after noon Lakers game in the evening

and a midnight surf session.

MIKE WADE IS A SCHIZO!emcee

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Name: J. FoxBirthplace: KenyaAge: UnknownAffiliations: Foxhole Entertainment, Roots Vibes Reggae BarRole: Producer, Rapper, Singer, Cultural IconStyles: Reggae, Hip Hop, Hybrid

J Fox is a mystery man, known throughout Japan as a premier producer/performer, ‘Fox’ is a staple on the underground hip hop and reggae scene here in Nagoya.His label, Foxhole, has the lofty goal of attaining international cultural diversity in and outside of Africa, through music.When you are in the market for dark, soulful, driving, percussion-laden beats, seek out the Fox. When you’re in the mood for real roots reggae vibes, his joint, Roots Vibes in Toshincho is open until sunrise. Just pass on thru.

The African

RootsmanThe African

Rootsman

Roots VibesLocated in Toshincho, ROOTS VIBES bills itself as an “All Reggae Muzik Space”. It’s got live reggae musicians on any given night, food, plus DJs and a great bar. If you’re into deep dub bass and crisp reggae beats, ROOTS VIBES is for you. Say “HAIL UP” to JFox when you fall in..

6Th Floor Ocean Bldg. 4-10-2 Sakae Naka-ku 052-263-3181

Unsound basically all met through mutual friends; the one exception is Mike who

had been picked up whilst gigging through the Nagoya music scene. The current

roster stands as: Matt from Oklahoma in the US on guitar and vocals, Yasu from here

in Japan also on guitar and vocals, Zack also hailing from Japan strumming the bass,

and finally the aforementioned Mike from the golden state of California in the US

keeping time on drums.Their influences are mixed, but include David Bowie, Radiohead, Pink Floyd,

Joy Division, Dinosaur Jr., The Church, Neil Young and Black Sabbath. Most of the

members were members of the band Oran, whose roots go back about five years.

Unsound has been the active successor group since about mid-to-late spring 2009.

Right now they’re working on a few new songs, with plans to start playing live

more as spring approaches. They are also laying the groundwork for a CD, on the

horizon for later on in the year as well. Let’s hope they cut it sooner than later!

UnSound Unraveled

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Bone Zero is something that just kind of happened, like a force of nature, a law of karma, like Over the Rainbow, like having the best looking girl at the party hit on YOU

for a change. But mostly Bone Zero came about because Nagoya needed a band that played rock and roll the way it was meant to be played. Four seasoned musicians from four widely different backgrounds got together and clicked from day one through a shared love of classic Rock and Roll.

“Magnificent” Mike Bagely (drums and backing vocals). From California, the land of Disney and Hollywood. Mike was given his nickname by the women who come to see the band. See when he plays, they leave their panties on the dance floor and throw THEMSELVES at the stage! Mike has had a long career with various bands both in the US and Japan, most notably when he was formerly the drummer for Nagoya’s popular band, Sushi Cabaret Club.

“Magic” Tom Bauerle (vocals and guitar) from Indiana USA, the land of James Dean, Michael Jackson, the Reverend Jim Jones and Bible-thumping snake handlers. Tom has been a fixture on the Nagoya music scene for a long time-- singing jazz, soul, blues, folk and country music in various combos. He was previously with the rock and soul group the Screaming Hormones, but he is ecstatic to be belting out raunchy Rock and Roll with this band.

“Jolly” Robert Hewer (lead guitar) from British Columbia, Canada, the land of moose and maple. Robert played professionally for a number of years in Canada

before moving to Japan. He’s calm. He’s Canadian. But there’s a fire hidden within. Beware of the calm before the storm… when he rips off a riff, it shakes the walls down.

Stephane Vizio (bass) from Switzerland, land of chocolate and cheese. Stephane has many aliases, including “Jaco,” “Chopper Sikorsky” and most mysterious of all, “Stephane.” No one knows why. The police have been informed and are on the case as we speak. It’s Stephane’s skill at improvising on the bass plus his encyclopedic knowledge of classic rock songs that is an integral element of the foot-stomping rhythm of the band.

The name “Bone Zero” comes from the idea of basic, stripped down, lead guitar-driven rock and roll, that defined the genre from the start. It’s fun, it’s loud. it’s straight-ahead driving music that gets you jumping up out of your seat and dancing.

“I’m constantly surprised at how good a musician these guys are,” says Magic Tom. “We take Classic Rock songs and change them around, make them our own. We write and play original music that sounds as good or better than the classic stuff. But most of all, these guys know how to IMPROVISE at the drop of a power chord.”

He adds, “It’s in the same tradition as the great guitar bands of the early days of Rock. There are some songs we never play the same way twice. And while we’re playing, if one of us, say the guitar player or the singer, goes off in a new direction, the others are right there with him. If the drummer or bass player want to take a solo, off they go, and we create something new there in the moment, and it sounds great, and DAMN THIS IS FUN!”

The Classic Quartet:

Bone ZeroBone Zero

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If you have been in Nagoya for any amount of time, it’s very likely you have heard the name Fatblueman more than once. The name Fatblueman might conjure up images of

Tobias Funke from the TV show Arrested Development, but the truth is there’s a reason you’ve heard that name so much. Fatblueman creates compelling and relateable music that sticks in your mind after one listen. The music is rooted in alternative country, but it strays from its genre like all mature bands ought to, and the simple and straightforward lyrics betray a richness of experience and insight. John, the central figure around which the fatblue world spins, accurately describes the feelings of alienation and frustration of living in a foreign land without coming off like a bitter old expatriate and more often than not, you’ll find yourself nodding in agreement to his observations of life. What follows is a heavily edited transcript of a discussion about physics, God, copyright and Google. Oh, and there is a little bit about music thrown in for good measure (pun intended).

RAN: For those who are uninitiated, what is Fatblueman all about?John: It’s basically about me and whoever I can get to do music with me and has always been. So the first Fatblueman was four guys who are all gone now. That’s the problem with doing music with foreigners, so then we said let’s not get foreigners lets get Japanese guys. We did get Japanese guys, and we got a Japanese girl and then the foreigner starts dating the girl which leads to all sorts of other problems. So what has become the “main period” of Fatblueman was when we had five members, Hiroko on violin, Tom on bass, Eishi on drums, Hiro Hirashiki on lead guitar and me doing stuff up front. When it was that format, that’s when we had some Youtube videos get to the front page and get a bunch of views, sold a bunch of CDs and got invited to the Youtube Live event about a year and a half ago in Tokyo with BoA and some major Japanese artists. Anyway, these days live music is a little more limited as far as what you can do and what you can draw so we are kind of focusing more on the internet anyway.RAN: So you think that embracing the internet is where you want to take the band?John: It fits our station of life right now, older guys with kids and jobs and degree studies and stuff. We got the CD on i-tunes and CD baby, and we put the album for free on Jamendo which is a free download, creative commons license site where we got all kinds of downloads and the cool back story is sales went way up instead of way down. Obviously people were listening to it with that version they

downloaded, and then going and buying it as well. Its kind of like-- you can trust the good heart of your fans. You know, recorded music has existed for what-- 50 years or whatever. Okay, so it was a big money getter for some big bands for a while, maybe those days are over and maybe that’s fine. I was listening this week to Gene Simmons from KISS. Asshole. He said the sad fact of digital music is that there will never be another mega band like KISS or The Rolling Stones. I say you might be right and I say who cares? The only reason that you were a mega band is that we didn’t have any other options. When I was a kid growing up in the mid-eighties, the music that was good was whatever you were told was good by the big companies. Now the quality of the music I want to listen to has gone so far up. I almost never listen to big artists anymore. Actually sometimes I feel like I have a responsibil-ity to steal their music. If its a big artist then download it, if its a small artist then pay for it. Its kind of like, you’re plainly telling us what it’s really all about for you. Its about getting rich, having lots of groupies, kinky sex, drugs.RAN: Well if groupies and sex was your main goal then Fatblueman was probably not the best choice of names. How did you choose that name?John: When I chose it as a screen name it was because I was really huge – I was like 113 kg sumo size, and really lonely and blue. No friends, didn’t speak the language and we didn’t have the internet like now. To be honest I don’t really like it, but it’s the one that got known and once you’re known you can’t switch it. The other thing is that it googles really well.RAN: How do you feel about the term gaijin superstar and do you think it applies to you?John: Anyone who ends up staying in Japan for a long time probably has a bit of a celebrity complex. Some gaijin say Oh I hate it when people notice you and stop and try to talk to you. I always liked that. I grew up in a town that was nothing but white people and if a black guy came to town I would have been the one to be like hey what are you doing here? How are you? What’s your name? I am interested in interacting with someone who is different, but I understand that for some people like my wife, she hates to be noticed, she hates to be the outsider. We have little white babies and when you go out in public with little white babies you get super noticed. I like that but she hates that. She is just like don’t touch them, don’t look at them, just treat me the same as everybody else. Whereas I think, you’re not the same as everybody else your a gaijin superstar.RAN: So you think every gaijin is a superstar in a sense?John: I didn’t say that! Well, famous or notorious. It has a good side and a bad side, every gaijin stands out...

FATBLUEMAN

|RAN|18

On January 13th, I woke up and downloaded the news podcasts like I do every weekday so I

could listen to them on my commute in to work. As I boarded the subway, and hit play on the iPhone, CNN was reporting that a massive earthquake had hit the island of Haiti in the Carribean. Details were sketchy at that point; the quake struck around 6:53am Japan Time (4:53pm Haiti Time), so scarcely an hour had passed since my podcast’s download. But one thing gave me a chill down my spine--the newscaster’s words “all com-munication has been cut, and we fear the worst.” The last time I heard those words was during the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina’s onslaught of the American Gulf Coast. Images of devastation and despair filled my mind.

We all know what came next. In the days and now weeks that have passed since that great tragedy, some untold losses have mounted. So many people have lost everything, but eventually houses, churches and buildings can be re-built. Sadly there is no recovery plan for a human life lost. I have been priviledged to be aquainted with someone who calls Haiti her homeland, and she granted me permission to share her story here on the pages of RAN in order to put a local face on this tragedy.

“I came to this land to discover myself”, says Dominique Fevry. She’s a spunky, outspoken, very atypical Ca-nadian-Hatian from Montreal. “I came because I wanted to go someplace completely opposite of the spectrum from my own experiences.” She explains,” when I was going to university, we’d always have these case studies in World Politics class. We’d often see what the opinions were of the residents of a lot of ‘First-World’ countries, and more often than not a lot of those opinions would end up being similar. However, the exception in a lot of cases would be Japan. It made me wonder ‘what’s up

with Japan?’ and ultimately it influenced my decision to become a JET once I graduated.”

About three years ago, Dominique became the JET representative for the city of Gero, in northern Gifu prefecture. “My first year there was extremely hard. It was the first time for many of the locals to ever see a black person.” Most people’s idea of someone from the West still evokes images of “blue eyes, blonde or brown hair, and fair skin--A straight up White person.” Dominique is the very antithesis of this. She has skin the shade of a dark chocolate, dark eyes, and high cheek bones. Less like even a girl you’d come across in the Canadian Great White North; she brings to mind the people you’d see from Liberia, Gambia, or Sierra Leone. “even in the mega-cities of Japan, you’d have a hard time finding a black woman there. So my first year in Gero was tough. I found it difficult to be accepted.” She is also a very outspoken, opinonated woman. “I had to fight just to keep my [motor]bike. My position as a civil worker was on the line, just because of my hobby. The older people here believe a woman shouldn’t be riding motorcycles.”

However after getting to know her neighbors and vice-versa, things have become different than that first year. “I was only going to spend a year--maybe two, in Gero. But I became close to the people here. I have found a deeper respect for Japan, and it’s people. Especially after what happened in my motherland.”

Of course she’s talking about the Haitan Earthquake that hit January 12. “I wasn’t even aware of the quake at first. When I wake up in the morning, my routine is to check the CBC news online. I remember seeing some pictures of black children crying and there was some rubble, and the headline Haitian Quake, so my thought was ‘Oh there was a quake back home’ and I didn’t

think the damage was as widespread and complete.” I didn’t have the time to read, since I had to go to work, but even my sister who is studying back in Canada emailed and said “what’s going on” and I said “I dunno”. It was too early.” It wasn’t until she had gotten to the school she was teaching at for the day when a Japanese friend broke the full severity of the news upon her. “My friend says ‘is your family ok’ and I say, ‘oh I don’t know’ but then again we don’t really have earthquakes. It took me two days to grasp the scale of the event.” Due to the time differences, a busy work schedule, and the lack of real news coverage on the local stations in her area, she didn’t have a complete scope of the event until 48 hours later. “Thank God for the internet, ya know? Of course maybe to most Japanese, this isn’t day-to-day news so it really wasn’t covered like it was, say in the States.”

When asked about her intial feelings once she could take in the full scale of the devastation, she takes a moment... “We have no country.　Our palace... The presidential palace is the symbol of government for Haitians. It’s like the White House to Americans, or Parliament House to Canadians. I saw a picture of it toppled over like a house of cards. I couldn’t believe what my eyes were seeing. We have no government. Its like waking up and seeing the White House is gone.”

Haiti is the poorest country in the western hemisphere by most statistics. But the Caribbean island nation is also the only country in the world that was taken by former African slaves after they revolted and kicked their French colonial masters out in 1804. This also means it was the first independent black-led republic in the world. It has a past that is sprinkled with years of dictatorships, wars, coup d’etat, and other huge natural disasters, usually hurricanes. Haiti is described by some as “A nation on the verge” and by others as “Trouble

La voix d’un Hatian, de nombreux oreilles Japonais

Halfway around the world, a daughter of Haiti sends

hope, prayer, and love.| Pictures and words by Jason Gatewood |

|RAN| 19

in Paradise.” For Dominique and others with Haitian heritage, it’s simply home--the Motherland.

“This is a sad thing...”, she says with tears welling. “But the beautiful thing about it is seeing the Hatian diaspora stand up. Hatians from Montreal, Toronto, New York, Miami, Paris, and all over helping our homeland. We’ve never had something like this to unite us, I think.” She goes on to tell me how Second-generation Haitians are able to become connected now to the country that their parents talk about growing up in, that they know only from summer trips or grandparent’s visits. “In the sadness of it all, we can feel the connection and the deep love for our country. It brings hope, because we are very strong and in very hard situations, we’ve been able to stand up before. We can do it again.” For over 200 years as an independent nation, Haiti’s economy and standards of living have been tumultuous at best; perhaps this is the fire that the phoenix can be born from.

Being here in Japan though, what can someone do? Being a whole 24 hours away by plane, half a world away literally... You might as well be on Mars trying to do something to help your homeland. And its hard enough for this American to donate money and clothing to the Haitian relief efforts back home-- initially, the only way I could personally do anything, was by going on the internet and using my Paypal account to donate. So what about the Japanese response? What’s it like being up in Gero, population 38,623 mostly Japanese, and 1 Haitian-Canadian, when this type of tradgedy hits? Do they even care?

“It took something of this magnitude to get me to see the beauty of the people here. Most of the Gero-ites have never met a Canadian or American, let alone one of Haitian descent. This was the biggest surprise of all, the response that I got from my neighbors in Gero.” She lives in the naka-no-inaka or as I call it “waaaay the F up in Gifu.” Gero is known for its hot springs and ryokan inns. There’s only one road winding its way through the Hida River valley and connects the various communities in town. “It took this sad event though for me to see this community less as a backwoods town, and see it as a close-knit community.” Dominique’s friends in the town rallied around her the second they heard the news and came up with various ways to support her and show they care. “I went with the idea that

I was all alone up there [in Gero] for the past 3 years. Now I see that in Japan--especially in the countryside--it takes a while for people to open up to you, but they’re not blind to you. They see everything.” When asked what changed her mind, “I only talked to two people-- My two friends since the beginning of my stay here, Junko and Yuko. We talk every week so they were the first to respond.” Her friends then spread the news like wildfire, and along the way, someone got the local Gero city elementary schools involved. “Before I knew it, I was being told the school kids had raised ¥90,000 in 1 yen coins... I couldn’t believe it. I still can’t”

Sometimes it takes tragedy and great loss to make one appreciative of the things that make up our lives. “It’s sad but true--and I feel more than a little foolish for saying this, but my great loss is actually a gain. Before I felt like a stranger in a strange land. Maybe more than that, I was an alien on another planet. But now I feel so connected. These past few weeks have erased 3 years of stigma I’d built up.” Dominique will be attending graduate school from this coming fall back in Canada; but she wants to find ways to help her Haitian brothers and sisters from right here in Japan. “We each have something we can let go of; an old jacket, maybe forgo a trip to the izakaya a few times a month, and you’ve got a few thousand yen to give, no pain” True-- I’ve taken to walk past the Hub in Sakae recently--walk past it a few blocks and hit the Circle K and save ¥300 on beer in one go. The rest goes to Haiti.

And before you start groaning about giving up that catbird seat in the back of OXO in Kanayama once a week, remember all this could easily happen here in good ol’ Nippon. I just know you didn’t forget that we sit atop one of the most active geological zones on Earth, right? Perhaps you’ve forgotten the rattler we had just 7 months ago last August. That was a M5.1 quake that hit around 5:30am, centered in western Shizuoka/ eastern Aichi prefectures. It was enough to shut down a 3km section of the Tomei expressway due to a section of it sliding off into the Pacific! Hmm... Need more? Go to Kobe and ask those folks about quakes, and if they were around during 1994, you’ll get all kinds of sympathetic ears. The Great Hanshin Earthquake struck around 8am on a cold January morning, killing 8000, and leaving many more homeless and injured. Half of Sannomiya, Motomachi and surrounding

districts in the Kobe seaside were on fire or collapsed. This could easily happen here in Nagoya. Scientists are calling for an M7 or greater quake to hit the Tokai region sometime before 2025, and there’s a 10% chance that it’ll top M8. Not good. The region hasn’t had a large earthquake in a few hundred years, so there’s cause for concern, but unlike Haiti, Japan has a strict, uniform building code, along with lots of lessons learned from previous events. In other words, the same M7 quake that hit Port-au-Prince and left that town in shambles, would scarcely be worth writing home about here... We hope.

So while I’m on the subject, break out your wallet twice. Once to make a donation for Haiti and pay that karma bill. And once more to prepare an earthquake kit for when it’s our turn. As of this writing, the death toll from the earthquake has reached 212,000 with 300,000 injured and over one million homeless.

Haiti, one of the poorest countries in the Caribbean, was struck by a magnitude 7.3 earthquake on January 12th 2010. Who doesn’t know that? I am sure everyone of

us feels the same sympathy for the small country, where reports estimate that up to 200,000 people may have perished within a few minutes. That is bad. Really bad. How bad? In the recorded natural disasters in the 20th and 21st centuries, only the Sumatra Tsunami of 2004 that took 246,000 lives and the 1976 China earthquake that claimed 246,000 lives is larger in scale to Haiti. The Kashmir earthquake in 2005 killed more than 75,000 people in India and Pakistan and another earthquake in China killed more than 69,000people in 2008. And who could forget Cyclone Nargis, that made landfall in Myanmar in 2008 and killed more than 138,000 people…OK, so maybe you don’t remember that one and neither do I, but before we start to feel guilty about not remembering foreign catastrophes half way around the world (I saved that for the end of this article….) these comparison DO show the severity and huge scope of Haiti’s disaster. This one will go down in the history books. Sure, some of you are thinking, Haiti’s population was among one of the world’s poorest poor, they can’t have lost that much anyway, right? So, their corrugated iron shacks collapsed, and maybe they lost what few measly possessions they had…maybe a few family members…they got big families, right? Surely it won’t take too many US dollars to fix them right up again, right? Lickety split. I mean, Haiti had it bad before they lost 200,000 people within a few short minutes. With a Human Development Index (HDI) rating by the UN of 149 (out of 182 listed countries), Haiti was considered pretty much the bottom of the barrel in developmental terms, or a “low-development” country. They are far below even neighboring Caribbean countries with Cuba rated at no. 51, border-sharing Dominican Republic at no. 90 and Jamaica no. 100. Most Western countries are in the top 20. Actually Japan is the only non-Western country in the top 20. Though Haiti’s claim to fame has long been their reputation as being the only nation, historically, born of slave revolt, their recent history has been marred by political and financial instability. They have seen 32 coups in their short 200 year history with US, German, French and British forces often helping things along by bankrolling and arming opposing Haitian military factions. Nothing new here. When has the West ever kept out of 3rd world nations’ domestic problems

when there wasn’t something to be gained from it. That would just be lost opportunity! Haiti was also in fact occupied by the US from 1915-1934 (and we wonder why they are politically unstable….?) More recently, the UN was forced to station inter-national peacekeepers in the country since 2004 under the UN operations name of MINUSTAH (US Stabilization Mission in Haiti) This article will brighten considerably after a quick token mention of even more widespread misery-inducing and devastating tropical storms that struck Haiti in 2004 and 2008. (severe flooding is reportedly partly to blame from widespread and rampant deforestation, so severe that you can see the border clearly from space, the Dominican Republic side is green, the Haitian side is brown.) Ok, so Haiti has had a hard century and a half. How can you help? Any donations that you give will only be a drop in the ocean compared to Haiti’s problems. A grain of sand on a never-ending beach….the money will never actually reach the needy, it’ll be snapped up and thrown into government coffers…or offshore accounts…they’ll never get their shit together anyway, why waste my money on them? Ok, maybe we are not all that negative in our assessment of charitable donations to less fortunate nations. I for one, really really wanted to donate something after the quake. (lame) I asked my husband last week, “So, don’t you feel like making some kind of donation to the victims in Haiti?”.

“No”. Oh. “Really? You don’t even want to give, like 5,000 yen to help them?”. “My money won’t reach them anyway….There are too many people on the planet…I would much rather give my money to animal charities”. (lamer) Are we all really such apathetic lameasses these days? Am I any better? Enthusiastically pointing my righteous finger at my pessimistic husband for his apathy to donate? I want to donate…but didn’t though. The point being that as of Feb. 3rd, I never actually made a donation. (lamest) Why not? Well, I don’t want to use my credit card online, in case it gets illegally stolen by some hacker. I never use my card online anyway, if I can help it. Unless of course you count that time last month I bought books on Amazon for my book club…or

purchased movie tickets online….or bought some songs on itunes….but those are all really secure sites and, I mean, come on, can we really trust the Japanese Red Cross online banking system? A flaky NGO? And I really needed all those material things, whereas I don’t really need to donate my hard earned cash to needy people that I have never met and can’t be sure

| By MzLove |

No Hope for Haiti ?No Hope for Haiti ?

|RAN|20

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will ever even see any of it….right? Totally understandable.It’s just logical. And completely lame. What is wrong with us? Youtube showed that George Clooney’s comments for HOPEFORHAITI telethon concert generated 286,000 hits at the end of January. Beyonce’s performance, “Haiti I can see your Halo…”, alone generated 80,753 views. Regular news updates only showed half of those hits or much much less. No one must be interested in Haiti unless Taylor Swift and Shakira are involved (involving very very tight pants I might add…). Are we such a celebrity addicted and obsessed civilization that it takes Clooney’s skillfully assembled “recognizable bag of faces” answering phones while celebrities hog the spotlight to make us donate our money to helpless victims of a nearly unprece-dented natural disaster? I mean, if even one percent of the net worth of all those “recognizable-bag-of-faces” was donated to Haiti, they wouldn’t have even needed to have the bloody telethon. 61 million dollars raised? How much did George make on his last movie? How much did Conan O’Brien just get for being bumped out of his late night time slot? I saw the telethon on TV a few weeks ago live while I was channel surfing and actually flicked past it. I saw Madonna belting out her 80’s hit “Like a Prayer”, (or was it 90’s?) in black leather pants and wondered whether I could physically prolong a cringe for that long while sitting on the couch. I figured it would actually be detrimental to my health and moved on…eventually turning the TV off as the Discovery channel was showing re-runs of that medieval war re-enactment. I’d already seen that. The point is, is assembling mega rich celebrities to answer phone live in TV really the only way to coax our lackadaisical and lazy asses into donating anything these days? Even lackadaisical asses who

won’t watch telethons won’t make donations. What is wrong with us? Ok. Guilt trip is over. What was the point of this seriously downer inducing article? Opus Dei style self-flagella-tion? Nietzsche-esque introspection of the worthless losers in all of us? If you did donate, then you deserve a pat on the back. Go ahead, do that right now. You deserve it. For the rest of us, donations can be made online to the Japanese Red Cross at: ……..Ok, forget that. I just went to the site and it says you can make a bank furikomi donation until Feb. 12 through UFJ? Ya, right…. I know you are sooo doing that right now…..I could only access the Emergency Relief Donation page in Japanese (the English site hadn’t been updated since 2009…) and though I could see Japanese people have donated the equivalent of 292,000 US$ by 59,000 people, I could not for the life of me figure out where to click to actually pay anything…and my Japanese is level 1! Forget that. Donations can additionally be made to the Canadian Red Cross at www.redcross.ca where a nice big red flashing “DONATE NOW” icon is waiting for you. You can even donate in French if the fancy so takes you. Pick a charity. Donate. Don’t be lame. Your money will help. You will get into heaven for free. You will be beatified after your death by the Pope in Rome. You will feel good. You will help someone. Just do it. Peace.

(At the time of printing MzLove still hadn’t donated a damn thing to Haiti, but is waiting to do so in person at the RanMagazine benefit concert of local, very non-celebrityish artists at the Hard Rock Café, at 7:00pm on March 5th. It’s written in ink here…with witnesses present. She will then, officially, no longer be donationally-challenged or lame. Join her!)

No Hope for Haiti ?No Hope for Haiti ?

|RAN| 21

|RAN|22

As you do your usual grocery store run, you suddenly notice that you forgot to bring your backpack or

grocery bag with you. No problem! In Japan, they wrap everything two or three times for you and (unlike most European countries) you get a free plastic bag to boot. Not anymore! The days of free plastic bags are numbered, and that’s a good thing. We all know how convenient plastic is. If you visit any conbini or supermarket these days you’ll notice about 90% or more of the goods are wrapped in some kind of plastic container. Without giving it a second thought, we buy plastic drink bottles, ready-made bento in styrofoam, and don’t even notice that bananas come wrapped in plastic as well. It almost seems like there’s more plastic here than even in Hollywood.

While I can’t explain the necessity for a Hello-Kitty plastic wrapped banana, why don’t we take a look at what all that plastic does to our bodies and the environment.

Is plastic biodegradable? - for the most part, no, so it ends up in a landfill, or worse..... in a burning facility, thus releasing one of the most toxic substance known to man into the air - dioxin.

Is plastic harmful for the environment? - It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that plastic is a horrendous

burden for the environment all the way from the production stage to the the waste management and disposal stage.

Does all this contact with plastic have any effects on our bodies? - Yup, afraid so. One of the building blocks of any plastic is a chemical called Bisphenol A (BPA). Plastic will leech this chemical and others into whatever food or liquid it’s wrapped around. Also the amount of Bisphenol A that is leeched into the food or liquid drastically increases as heat, pressure, or time breaks down some of the chemical bonds. Now how many of those combini bentos do you see being carelessly shoved into the microwave each and every day? And who doesn’t appreciate a hot (BPA infected) drink from a vending machine on a cold day? Think about all those chemicals that end up in the food or liquid and thus in your bodies any given day.

* How does it actually affect the body? -- Well, that’s really tough to say with any kind of certainty because everyone’s body reacts differently, but one particularly popular “C” word comes to mind - Cancer! But that’s not all plastic contamination has to offer you:

* Premature Puberty* Hyperactivity* Low-Sperm count

* Obesity* Schizophrenia

The problem with plastics in regard to this potential is their relative instability. Plastics break down over time, releasing toxins. This process is sped up in the presence of heat. When these toxins leak into the environment, they tend to contaminate our food, cosmetics, commonly used products, and toys, or are spread into the air where we then inhale them. Almost all toxins released from plastics make their way to humans in one form or another.

Still think plastic is not harmful? Well, these next few statements should really give you a good wake up call:

“BPA shows negative effects in brain tissue “at surprisingly low doses.”

-Scott Belcher, PhD.

“BPA has often been implicated in disease or developmental problems.”

-University of Cincinnati Research Team headed by Scott Belcher

Since it mimics Estrogen in the body, it has also been linked to changing sexual orientation in Lab Mice. In another series of tests, it has been

The G reen SPOT

TRAPPED IN A

| Story and photo by Achim Runnebaum |環境

PLASTIC BUBBLE

shown to alter the brains of baby boys, making them more feminine. Males exposed to high doses in the womb went on to be less likely to play with boys’ toys like cars, or to join in ‘rough’ and tumble games, say US Researchers. The study group was still very young, but it was concluded that reduced masculine (testoster-one-fueled) male play at an early stage of development might lead to other ‘feminized’ developments later in life.

Heard enough? Scared yet? If reading these facts (and there are many, many more) has finally woken you up from your deep slumber enough to notice that especially in Japan, we are surrounded by plastics, and you’re wondering what to do about it, think no further and join me in trying to boycott or at least significant-ly reduce the use of plastics from our everyday lives.

Instead of buying bottled water, buy a good filter for your tap water and use a reusable bottle or container to bring the water with you instead of buying 3-5 plastic bottles a day.

If it can be avoided, don’t microwave any food that is covered by plastic, whether its a bento box, or an onigiri, etc. Heat releases more BPA into the food you’re about to eat.

By the same token, resist the urge to get those hot drinks from vending machines if they come in a plastic bottle. The bottles have been sitting in the machine for who knows how long, while being kept at a certain temperature. The amount of BPA and other harmful chemicals released into the liquid throughout the day must be staggering.

Don’t use and/or reuse plastic eating utensils. I know it’s tough trying not to rely on plastics so

much. Try this little experiment: The next time you go shopping, notice all the plastic things that end up in your shopping cart. Think for a second if there are alternatives available and if that’s the case, get those instead. Let’s stop the widespread usage of plastics to improve our health and improve the environment around us. Everyone can do their part. It’s time to stop living in a bubble, open your eyes and realize what’s really affecting your lives, and how you can contribute to the global environmental change in a positive way.

“Because we don’t think about future generations, they will never forget us.” -- Henrik Tikkanen

Fo r more in fo rma t ion , check ou t t he fo l lowing l i nk s abou t p l a s t i c :

http://www.ecologycenter.org/factsheets/plastichealtheffects.html

http://www.eco-ethical.co.uk/plasticbag.html

http://lifewithoutplastic.com/

|RAN|24

Deadly’s Tips恋愛関係

Sound and Silence| By Deadly D |

The way in which one’s personal worries, fears, anger, emotions and feelings are shared is strongly

dictated by the culture one was brought up in. Some cultures stress the stiff upper lip while others pull knives and threaten each other on a daily basis. If you are from a so-called “open” culture like Australia or the US where people are urged to “talk it out” and “communicate” with their partners, you’re not going to fit harmoniously together with a culture like Japan where real heart-felt emotions are never, NEVER displayed except under extreme circumstances.

The Japanese have two terms for their emotions: tatemai and honne. Tatemai are the feelings you express in public and to people you know. In essence, you say and feel what you are supposed to. You are expected to react just like everyone else in the same situation. Honne are your true feelings, your true heart, which you are obliged to keep to yourself so it doesn’t bother anybody. This takes a great toll on them as human beings. All that anger kept bottled up inside can over flow and explode at what seems to be rather absurd times. It’s obvious to see the difficulties that would arise when someone who wants to “talk it out” gets

involved with someone who has been taught to stonewall any unpleasant emotions as a matter of good manners.

Enough problems arise naturally between women (who tend to be more

intuitive) and men (who tend to be more logical) when trying deal with daily life. An oft-repeated scenario goes something like this:

Male: Why are you mad at me?

Female: You didn’t do A.

M: You never told me you wanted me to do A!

F: You should have known I wanted you to do A!

A: How the hell could I know that? I’m not a mind reader?

F: Well, you should have known!

Now multiply this effect a thousand times when you factor in the vast differences in background experience and expectations between two different cultures:

M: Now what? Why are you angry?

F: You should have done A!

M: How was I to know that? You never said to do A!

F: How can you be so stupid? Everybody does A! How can you not know that? And you didn’t do A the last time six months ago, either!

M: Why didn’t you say something six months ago? Nobody does A where I come from!

F: This is Japan!

M: But I’m not Japanese. Why do we need to do A that way anyhow?

F: Because that’s how everyone does it. Everyone knows that!

So it is inevitable that judgments

about appropriate behavior during a crisis are vast and various from one another. Japanese see many foreigners as too uncontrolled and rude because they can’t help expressing their emotions even when it is not deemed appropriate in Japanese society. Many foreigners see Japanese as being emotionally immature because they can’t express themselves emotionally except in two modes: either stoic silence or in screaming about in-consequential things.

Case study #1: One friend’s Japanese wife began yelling uncontrollably at him one day for no reason that he could fathom. After everyone had calmed down it came out that she had been angry at him for years because of the way he ripped open the plastic bags inside cereal and cracker boxes instead of cutting them open neatly with a pair of scissors. “The cereal always falls out through the broken top and is messy,” she said. “Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked. “I was too shy,” she replied.

Case study #2: One friend’s Japanese wife actually ran him over with the family car during what he thought was a routine argument over mundane things. Obviously they weren’t so mundane to her! [Whatever the problem was, it was quickly forgotten by us due to the gravity of the ensuing outcome --Ed.]

An international couple needs to figure out a way to communicate their feelings somehow before internal frustration poisons the water for everyone.

* Japanese see many foreigners as too uncontrolled and rude...

Many foreigners see Japanese as being emotionally immature.

. . .

| By Larry Defelippi |

Sexploitation, thinly masked social critiques or allegories for left wing political themes? Whatever

the consensus, Pink Eiga marches to it’s own drum.

The elemental and explicit imagery present in Western erotica are absent, Japanese ero-productions had been infused with their own particular style primarily because of what couldn’t be shown. Though with plenty of gratuitous displays of bare breasts, asses and simulated sex, no working parts were to be seen. The genre ironically lost it’s popularity because of it’s lack of explicit pussy shots and fucking favored by the at-home, VHS watching, wanking male.

It seems video killed more than just the radio star.

It is the roles of the women in these narratives that are the main attraction here; the stereotypical subservient, cute Japanese women that predominate Japanese pop culture are not to be found. Instead were tough, not-to-be-fucked-with women who after surviving no end of degradations and humiliations; rape, cat-fights, sukebe, torture, sword-fights, proved that the fastest road to female empowerment was at the end of a bloody katana.

Eulogizing a lost genre

|RAN| 25

When In Rome郷に入れば

|RAN|26

| By TD Houchen |

Look. We’re all a bunch of misfits, ne’er do wells, social outcasts, adventure seekers, and maladjusted perpetual adolescents, that’s why we’re here, on this lonely little island off the coast of nowhere. We’ve come to reinvent ourselves and some of us are doing almost too good a job.

Lost your marbles yet?

Last issue, we looked at stereotypes of Japanese women, for which I received a lot of flak, but what the hell is so great about us? Check these stereotypical foreign dude personality types and see which best describes you. Come on, you’re in there somewhere..

“...why am I such a misfit?”-as sung by “Charlie In The Box” on the Island

of Misfit Toys/Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer

ILLU

STRA

TIO

NS:

AD

AM

PA

SIO

N

The-Uber-Idiot-Supernerd- Who-Has-Somehow-Trans-formed-Himself-Into-The- Coolest-Guy-You-Know

Back home, this is the guy who everyone in high school took turns punching in his arm. Here, he’s the classic example of “zero-to-hero” in 60 seconds flat, give or take. He still doesn’t look quite cool, overbite and grey crew-neck wool sweater and all, but tell that to his smoking hot Japanese medical-student girlfriend. He speaks fluent Japanese, has a black belt in Aikido, a great apartment, and a million yen in the bank. This is the guy we all aspire to be here, but somehow, the Nerd wins the prize.

The Over-Ambitious-Deluded-Wanker

Everytime you see this guy, he’s got some new scheme that’s either going to make him rich, make him famous, or allow him to never have to work again. He’s full of ideas on how he can capitalize on being here in Japan, yet nothing seems to quite work out like he planned. Right now, he’s working on becoming a world-famous gangsta rapper, straight out of Ichinomiya. Put down the pipe homie.

The Bitter Guy

This guy is a walking dark cloud of discontent. He complains about everything and everyone and wonders why people are dropping him like a bad habit. He’s a negative force always trying to bring everyone down and/or destroy everyone else’s good time. He’s a killjoy in every sense of the word, and blames Japan and Japanese for his bad fortune. He’s about as fun as diarrhea.

|RAN| 27

The Pathetic Loser

Woe is him. This guy has no money, no job, no place to live, no plan and no clean clothes. How did all this happen? He doesn’t quite remember, but wants you to spare him 300\ for some coffee. You want to help him out, but first, he’s gotta want to help himself. He lives in a park near you. He’s always down on his luck, no matter where he is.

The Shady Guy

No one really knows much about this guy. Where he lives, where he works, IF he works, where he’s from, it’s all a mystery. He goes by initials only, “DB”, “JR”, “ET”, something like that. He’s always around and makes everyone a little nervous. He could be a serial killer on the lam, or a spy, or a terrorist, or all three. He speaks in hushed tones and then suddenly, he’s gone. Last I heard, he was in a Vietnamese jail, I don’t know really, no one does.

The-Guy-Who-Thinks-You-Should-Be-His-Best-Friend-Because-You-Two-Are-Not-Japanese

The song that best describes this dude is Radiohead’s ‘Creep’-“..and I wish I was special/you’re so fucking special..”-this guy wants friendship by default, the only commonality between you two is that you’re both non-Japanese. Usually, the first thing out of this winner’s mouth is, “..you know what I hate about Japanese…?”, he says this not considering that maybe you’re married to a Japanese, or maybe you’ve learned a thing or two about Japanese since arriving here. He’s a bit like an earache, this guy, you just want him to go away.

The Japanophile Otaku

This guy presumes to know everything there is to know about Japan, it’s people, it’s culture, history, language, everything. He spends his time reading Japanese history books, watching anime movies, and trying to memorize every Kanji symbol that exists. He’s constantly trying to school and impress anyone within earshot of his boundless knowledge of Japan, while he deludes himself into thinking one day they’ll accept me as one of them, not realizing he’s the one they’re making the most fun of. He’s wearing pajamas outside now.

The Loud Mouth

This guy is always talking a-mile-a-minute, about nothing of any particular interest to anyone besides himself. He’s practically begging someone to chop him in his adam’s apple. He’s been everywhere, met everyone, and always has a story to top whatever anyone else is saying. He might be telling the truth, but who cares? You just want him to shut the hell up for a minute..

|RAN|28

The Parasite

As the name implies, this cretin sucks you dry of everything, offering nothing in return. He wants your friends, your contacts, your style, your dreams, your ideas, wants to know your places of interest and wants to go everywhere you’ve been invited, not to mention he’s tailing your girl-but he never thinks to return the favor of what you’ve done for him. Friendship is hard to come by in Japan, or anywhere for that matter, and this guy is just sucking your blood.

The Liar

Nothing this guy says regarding his present or past life remotely resembles reality. He “used to” do and be everything under the sun. Of course, you can’t prove or disprove anything he says, all the better for this former shark-wrestler/stock broker/professional stunt man/news anchor/NASA Scientist/Pulitzer prize winning journalist/Formula 1 Race car driver/best selling author/lawyer/gangster/cop/doctor/drug-dealer/hitman/male stripper/gynecologist-to-the-stars/DJ-come on man, are you on qualuudes or do you think everyone else is? Get a clue Pinocchio.

The Perpetual-Culture- Shock-Victim

This guy has been here 7 years and still can’t get over the fact that he lives here now. He hasn’t learned a word of Japanese, hasn’t adopted to the social customs, and he sticks out like a giant purple squid. He’s about as flexible as a lightpole and the first words out of his mouth are almost always, “..in my country”-he doesn’t yet realize no one gives a shit about his country. Thing is, he’s not going anywhere fast, and everyone knows this but him. People tiptoe around him where it isn’t necessary and he’s a bit like a big baby.

The Wanna-Be-Japanese

Not to be confused with the Japanophile, who actually knows something about Japanese culture, this guy wants to be Japanese so bad he can taste it. He bends over backwards trying to “fit in” every chance he gets, saying “sumimasen” to anyone within earshot and over-doing every little gesture to make sure the Japanese within view don’t mistake him for being a foreigner. He bows so low his nose scrapes the concrete. Yeah, sure buddy, keep it up, one day you’ll wake up and actually be Japanese. Enjoy that.

The Lifer

This guy has been here since the Edo period. He hasn’t been back to his home country in 3 decades. He’s neither “foreigner” nor “Japanese”, but something else entirely. He’s a man with no country, as it were. This guy could be either the coolest guy to hang out with, or the most bizarre prick you’ll ever come across. Or both.

Are you one of these guys, or something altogether different? We can all use a makeover, no one’s perfect, but don’t make yourself over into one of these guys…next time you’re complaining about anything or anyone, first, check yourself mate, what’s so great about you?

Like my man Robert Nesta Marley said, “...who the cap fit/ let them wear it.” Sometimes, I’m all of these guys. The thing is to notice who we are in the moment, become concious of it, and learn and grow from that point forward. Carry on.

tdh

|RAN| 29

CLUBS - LOUNGES - BARS

Plastic FactoryLocated in Imaike, PF is a great event/art/music space housing some of the best electro/house/techno parties in town. It’s also home to HARMONIUM PARLOUR, Nagoya’s best open-mic event-the last Sunday of every month. Plastic Factory has an eclectic mix of events and music, call ahead.

Cover at PF is usually around 1500yen, drinks are decent. Say what’s up to HEINZ behind the bar. Good man.

32-13 Kando-Cho Chikusa-Ku 090-9894-9242 ・ www.plasticfactory.jp

Roots VibesLocated in Toshincho, ROOTS VIBES bills itself as an “All Reggae Muzik Space”. It’s got live reggae musicians on any given night, food, plus DJs and a great bar. If you’re into deep dub bass and crisp reggae beats, ROOTS VIBES is for you. Say “HAIL UP” to JFox when you fall in..

6Th Floor Ocean Bldg. 4-10-2 Sakae Naka-ku 052-263-3181

ID CaféThis place is infamous on the Nagoya nightclub scene, and for good reason. This space has 6 floors of music, each floor a different theme. Saturday nights are rammed and the party is not for the faint of heart. For pure balls-out drunken juvenile beat-laden fun, ID is the place. Right in the center of Sakae, walking distance from seemingly everywhere. Cover runs about ¥3000 w/4 drinks, hip hop/techno/80’s/reggae, ID covers all bases. If you make this a regular spot, cop yourself a discount card, to get that cover charge nixed.

3-1-15 Mitsukoshi Bldg. Sakae Naka-ku.052-251-0382 ・ www.id-cafe.info

SoulGroundI almost don’t want to give this one away. It’s a small, cozy, very cool bar upstairs from JB’s in Toshincho. The DJs play vintage soul music accompanied by a large video screen. It’s romantic, but laid back, sexy and mellow…and the music, classic man. Bring your girl. Or your girl’s girl. Or both..No cover.

3F Marumikanko Bldg. 4-3-15 Sakae Naka-ku 052-241-7366 ・ www.underground.co.jp

RADIXLocated sorta close to TSURUMAI, Radix is a late-night club-space made for dancing the night away underneath thumping beats and a dope light show. Radix usually houses reggae events, but also hip hop,

techno, and trance events make their home here. Cover is usually in the 2000yen range, really nice party space, if you don’t mind the trains clamoring overhead every few minutes..

4-7-38 Chiyoda Naka-ku 052-332-0073 ・ www.info@radix.to

Samba BrazilThis large Brazilian nightclub/restaurant/live house is famous for all night parties with lovely Brazilian ladies, sexy Samba, delicious food and tropical drinks. An evening at Samba is going to set you back at least 3000yen, but the party goes until dawn and this place definitely has it’s own flavor. Wild nights here. Carnivale in Nagoya all-year round.

4-15-21 Kanko Bldg. No. 2 Sakae Naka-ku052-251-1051

LIVE HOUSESHuck FinnLocated in Imaike, HF is a Nagoya fave. Two floors, downstairs usually features punk, thrashcore, rockabilly, hardcore, speed metal, etc, acts from as far away as NY, Australia and San Fran regularly make their way onto the HF stage. Upstairs is a hodge-podge mixture of acoustic stuff…was there recently and was serenaded by the sounds of a very cute J-girl singing Christmas songs accompanied by a ukulele. Odd, but nice. Great food and drinks on hand as well. Down By Law. 2000yen range.

B1 Ishii Bldg. 5-19-7 Imaike, Chikusa-Ku 052-733-8347 ・ www.huckfinn.co.jp

Gary’s MotownGary’s is known throughout Japan as a hot jumpoff spot for partying, drinking, dancing and mingling. It’s walking distance from anywhere in Sakae, and it’s a Nagoya institution. The bands who cruise through Gary’s are some of the best R-n-B/Hip Hop/Jazz musicians you’ll ever see anywhere. They know how to get the party going and KEEP it going until the wee hours. Usually around 2000yen.

B2F Koasha Bldg. 4-2-10 Sakae Naka-Ku052-263-4710 ・ www.garys.jp

MisfitsYou know the place, but what you don’t know is that recently Monday Night Open Mic has been blasting off. With some really talented musicians rolling through, Michael Wade serving up the booze, and

|RAN|30

recommendsRAN ’s staff and readers like these places / this stuff. You might, too...

Stevie P. cooking up his gourmet specialties, MISFITS MONDAY NIGHT is suddenly all the rage. No cover.

Bee House Bldg 3F 4-10-16 Imaike Chikusa-Ku052-733-7352 ・ www.misfitsnagoya.com

Club QuattroClub Quattro is a gem of a live-house located in the Parco Building in the middle of Sakae. It regularly features famous acts who are either on their way up or down, but who rock out none-the-less. The space holds upwards of 4 or 5 hundred people. Prices vary according to acts, but the sound is excellent and the vibe is right. For Those About To Rock.

Parco Building 3-29-1 Sakae Naka-ku052-264-8211 ・ www.club-quattro.com

RESTAURANTS - CAFESGolden Child CaféThis is a sweet little café located underneath the train tracks on the Tsurumai line near Kanayama St. Nice food stuffs, attractive clientele, massage chairs and low prices keep the customers coming back. Don’t tell everyone though, it’s our little secret.

4-26-1 Chiyoda Naka-Ku (Kanayama Sta)052-331-8139 ・ www.goldenchildcafe.com

Pa’INA Aloha TablePa’Ina means ‘party’ or ‘dinner’ in native Hawaiian language. Aloha offers a delectable variety of food that you can’t quite get anywhere else. The atmosphere is low key and the music is soft and enchanting, sorta like Hawaii. There are two of these in the Nag area, by Nagoya Station and one in Asunal at Kanayama Station. Really nice date spot, and the Kanayama joint is poppin’ when the weather gets warmer.

3-17-19 Meieki Nakamura-ku Nagoya(Nagoya or Kanayama Stns)052-589-3900 ・ www.zetton.co.jp

Outback SteakhouseMeat done Aussie style, blooming onions and delish sweet bread, bet you forgot Nagoya has an Outback didn’t you. Located in the heart of Sakae, Outback is your spot if you’re craving a thick steak and great service.

3-24-22 Kowa Bldg. B1F Nishiki Naka-ku 052-968-7800 (Subway Sakae Sta) www.outbacksteak-house.co.jp

Le BerseyTrust me, the only thing French is the name. Just up the street from Ikeshita station, this has become my “dive” over the past year. I say that with toungue in cheek; the decor, drinks, and eats are far from dive quality, but the

prices most certainly please the tightest of budgets--Can you say ‘One Coin Beer?’ Suzuki-san and his sons keep the place humming, and there’s a crowd of regulars that will make you think you just walked on the set of Cheers.

1-12-28 Hi-Home Bldg 1F052-751-8058

EVENTSROCK THIS TOWNRAN/ROCK/RELIEF - Haiti Earthquake BenefitMarch 5th ・ 7pm - until ?

Live Music featuring some of Nagoya’s best bands.

Cost: Free, but asking at least ¥500 cash, clothing or durable food donation.

Where?: HARD ROCK CAFÉ, Fushimi, Nagoya.(Subway Fushimi Sta)http://ran4.us/RTT-2010

St. Patrick’s Day ParadeMarch 6th ・ 12pm

Everyone’s Irish on March 6th! Every year we have hundreds of people join us in the celebrations at Osu Kannon. The opening ceremony starts at 12:30 and the parade begins at 2pm. After the parade there’s an Irish music concert at the Osu Engelijo Theater. The celebration continues at Shooters at Fushimi from 6pm. I wonder if they’ll have some green beer like back home?

Where?: Osu Shopping Streets and Park(Subway Osu Kannon Sta or Kamimaezu Sta)http://stpatricksnagoya.com/

Nagoya WalkathonMay 23rd ・ 9am-4pm

The 19th annual ACCJ / NIS Walkathon and Interna-tional Charity Festival is coming soon, so its time to start signing up to walk! They’re building bridges between the Japanese and international communities to raise money in support of vital work being conducted by local non profit and charitable organizations in the Chubu region. Last year they garnered ¥5.5 million, and this year the goal is ¥8 million in donations. Go get your walk on, then enjoy the bands and foods in the rest pavillions afterwards. Sign ups can be done on their website.

Where?: Tsurumai Park(JR & Subway Tsurumai Sta)http://www.nagoyawalkathon.com

|RAN| 31

RAN ’s staff and readers like these places / this stuff. You might, too...

GOT INK?GOT INK?Your body is a temple, but how

long can you live in the same house before you redecorate?

Pop Quiz; what do David Beckam, Johnny Depp, and Amy Winehouse have in common other than being instantly recognized anywhere? They all would probably be denied entrance to an Onsen in Japan...... Why, you may ask.... simply because they have Tattoos.

Having a Tattoo is almost becoming the norm in other countries; it’s a different story, at least on the surface, in Japan....

I got inked recently to remember a certain period in my life of which I wanted to have a permanent memory. While totally accepted in most of the western world (even my mother, who is nearly 70 years old got a tattoo about 5 yrs ago), here in Japan, it’s still somewhat of a rarity.... or so I thought.

In the past, tattoos here were associated first and foremost with the Yakuza, who display full body tattoos done the traditional Japanese way (Tebori)....or at least, that’s the common belief we’re all told, but actually it’s a far older tradition in Japan than that. It all started with the Ainu people, who lived in what is currently Hokkaido, and tattooed the lips and mouths of their single women with broad blue bands that looked much like mustaches. This ceremony was called “Nuye” or “Sinuye”, the Ainu synonym for tattooing. According to legend, a deity descended from heaven and explained to all the women that every woman without a tattoo, who married a man, is committing a big sin and she won’t find salvation after death.

From that time tattoos were indis-pensable and vital for Ainu women. The tattooing is conducted by specialists over years, by rubbing charcoal dust in the with sharp little knives which carves the skin, giving young girls a black-blue looking, sideways pointed line called “Anci-Pini”.

Ainu women also believe that tattoo marks lets them assume the appearance of their goddess, so that the several evil demons of disease will mistake them for the goddess, and flee away.

This is a far cry from the sometimes still frowned upon practice of tattooing in Japan today. While it is certainly becoming more and more accepted, there are still many people here who frown upon anyone displaying their

tatoos, because of the strong, negative connotations this art has in Japan. Several people I interviewed even stated that they would feel uncomfortable dating someone who has a tattoo. But the times are changing fast, and more and more people are getting inked for various reasons. There’s a growing community of Tattoo lovers emerging all over Japan, even in our somewhat conservative Nagoya. “To be tattooed in Japan is to suggest that you have abandoned society and turned your back on the rules” said one heavily Tattoo artist I had the chance to interview.

Historically, The Meiji Restoration of 1868 marked the start of Japan’s advent into the “modern” world. Japan’s goal was to become the “equal” of the Americans and British. Feudal systems were abolished and Japan attempted to absorb western culture, with the Japanese adopting western clothing, manners and education. As part of this “restoration,” in 1872 the government banned tattooing which was regarded as a sign of barbarism.

While most people get tattoos just for fashion, or in a drunken haze, there are far more meaningful reasons. Some people get tattoos because they want to remember a certain time in their life, some get tattoos as a mark or insignia (ex: prison tattoos), some get their partner’s names tattooed, while others get tattoos as symbols of protection or right of passage. A small minority even let themselves get tattoos simply for adver-tisement purposes for big corporations. Microsoft Zune anyone......So the reasons for getting them are as various as the designs, but for me, a genuine tattoo.... tells a story. I like stories and tattoos, no matter how well done, and if they don’t tell a story that involves you emotionally, then they’re just there for decoration; then they’re not a valid tattoo. There has to be some emotional appeal or they’re not, in my way of thinking, a real tattoo. It tells people what you are and what you believe in.

One of the purveyors of the Tattoo scene in Nagoya is Sabado of Panda Cafe/Eccentric Super Tatoo in Osu. This guy is a legend in the Tattoo Art world, frequently traveling all over the world to show his designs. As a young man, he was traveling through South America and met

a tattoo artist on the streets in Brazil. As fate would have it, he got his first tattoo, which was done in a very simple way (on the streets of Brazil with self-made equipment), and was hooked after that.... Eventually he would meet none other than Ed Hardy who gave him another Tattoo and inspired him to become a Tattoo artist himself. According to him, when getting a tattoo, one of the most important things is who did the tattoo, after that comes the design. It’s not just about the design, but also about building a relationship with the artist, because the personality of the artist comes out in the designs. And his personality certainly comes out in the designs... They were some of the most vivid, clean and professional designs I’ve ever seen. He only does original work though, so don’t even think about asking him to put your partner’s name on your body, or getting a tramp stamp....he won’t have it.

Another main player in the Tattoo World in Nagoya are BoobiesTattoo and Black Rebel in Osu. When the gang from Motley Crue came through Nagoya, this is the place they choose to get a tattoo. Boobies/Black Rebel are one of the biggest Tattoo parlors in Nagoya, and the Staff there are great! There are 8 Tattoo artists, including Ta’co (seen in the pictures), who will help you with your design, or come up with something truly original...

If you’re in the market for a Tattoo, you can’t go wrong with either of these places. Best part is both Sabado and the people at Boobies speak English!

Tattoos have served in many various and diverse cultures as rites of passage, marks of status and rank, symbols of religious and spiritual devotion, decorations for bravery, sexual lures and marks of fertility, pledges of love, punishment, amulets and talisman, protection and as the marks of outcasts and convicts.

Now it’s your turn. We wanna hear from you. Shoot us a picture of your Mark and the story behind it for a follow up in a future issue....

editor@ranmagazine.com

Now it’s your turn. We wanna hear from you. Shoot us a picture of your Mark and the story behind it for a follow up in a future issue....

editor@ranmagazine.com

|RAN|32

| Story and photos by Achim Runnebaum |

GOT INK?GOT INK?

|RAN| 33

SABADOECCENTRIC SUPER TATTOO

3-5-49 OSU, NAKA-KUAichi Prefecture

Nagoya 460-0011Japan

Phone/fax: +81-(0)52-262-3246www.lovesabado.com

Boobies Tattoo Studio

Aichi-ken, Nagoya ShiNakaku, Osu 3-17-1

Akamon Brother Building 4F

Phone: 052-262-4649www.boobiestattoo.jp

Ink to paper is thoughtfulInk to flesh, hard-core.

If Shakespeare were a tattooistWe’d appreciate body art more - Anonymous

*Special Thanks to Ta’co of Boobies/Black Rebel for letting me sit in and document

one of her Tattooing Sessions.

|RAN|34

Far beyond the novelty of eating food from such a remote area as Morocco, the charm of Casablanca

becomes evident even before the spoon hits your mouth. The warm light of Moorish lamps, ornate Berber rugs and Arabian tapestries draped over the walls creates an ambiance that is unmatched anywhere in the city. On weeknights the soothing Moroccan music creates an intimate and romantic dining experience, but with the arrival of the weekend, Casablanca transforms into a high-spirited and boisterous atmosphere with live belly dancing.

To sample a wide variety of dishes, I opted for the Casablanca set course, a wise choice for first-timers. The first dish to arrive was a flavorful bean soup called Harrira. The soup is seasoned herbs and spices as well as meat, but like almost everything on the menu, there are vegetarian substitutes. The next to arrive was couscous and steamed vegetables with a gravy like sauce, sprinkled with chickpeas. The sensation on the tongue is a rich, almost buttery taste and yet its subtle and sophisticated. Immediately following this was the briwat, a sort of meat pastry. I will be the first to admit the words meat and pastry do not sound good together, but the briwat largely succeeds. The crust is crisp and flaky, almost like baklava and slightly sweet, while the inside is made of ground beef. The vegetarian course included a briwat made of fish which was a bit spicier and more to my liking, but there is also the option of cheese briwat as well.

The main platter had kebabs which is a deceptive word because nearly every country from the Nile to the Ganges has their own version of the kebab, and no two kebabs are even slightly similar. Comparing Turkish kebabs to Moroccan kebabs is like comparing pasta to ramen; distant cousins but not distant enough that it’s okay to fuck them. That said, the kebabs at Casablanca are exceptional. They can be had in the form of roasted lamb, beef, chicken or fish. Far removed from the salty, oily (and irresistible) kebabs that call your name from the Turkish food carts after the pubs are closed, these are kebabs you can eat and not feel bad afterward. Of course the Pièce de résistance is the tajine, a sort of conical earthenware pot that funnels steam and concentrates it to stew vegetables with no extra water. Necessity is the mother of invention and the harsh desert is the mother of the tajine which cooks the most delectable stewed meats and veggies to perfection every time. Casablanca’s tajines include hearty portions of beef, lamb, chicken or fish along with thick and succulent slices of carrots, potatoes, okra and squash. One can easily imagine sitting inside a nomadic Berber’s tent, gathered around a steaming tajine, mouth watering like a Pavlovian dog. Slurp.

But what is the point of all this exquisite food without something to wash it down with? Casablanca boasts an assortment of Middle Eastern and African wines and various international beers as well. Every time I’ve tried this restaurant

I find myself slightly disappointed by the wines; perhaps they are not to my taste. The South African white wine I found too sweet, the Lebanese red wine I found to be a bit dry and lacking a full flavor. The Moroccan beer, also called Casablanca, is a touch more flavorful than the typical flavorless lagers like Asahi or Sapporo, but is still quite run of the mill, lacking any real character or aroma. The best drink on the menu is included in the course: Moroccan mint tea. This refreshingly sweet tea serves to cleanse the palate in a very subdued way without shocking your mouth the way ginger does. Its an excellent way to calm your stomach after overindulging and it leaves a nice sweet aftertaste on the tip of your tongue.

If Humphrey Bogart was eating chow like this every day, its no wonder he sent Ingrid Bergman off on that airplane alone. He wanted it all to himself. Casablanca is open every day from 5:30 to 11:00pm. Its a 4 minute walk from Takaoka station, near the Denny’s. Don’t take me and Humphrey’s word for it, go check it out yourself!

Nagoya-shi, Higashi-ku, Izumi, 1-9-14, Takaoka Residence 1F052-953-7774Map link: http://goo.gl/TTdg

Taste味わう

“of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world...” - Humphrey Bogart

CasablancaCasablanca| Review and photos by Adam Pasion |

|RAN| 35

Tissues, tissues everywhere and all the guys did drool (over the Nana girls). Whether you frequent the

bustling streets of Sakae, or hang around Nagoya Station area, you’ll never have to buy tissues for yourself. As a matter of fact, I can’t remember the last time I paid for tissues since coming to Japan. The advertisements on them range from language school offers to beauty products, all the way to “companion” services.

I’m sure you’ve accepted the occasional tissue handed to you by a very young girl, dressed a little too provocative for her age, or wearing a yellow coat with comic characters on the back. Chances are, she works for Nana Cafe. You’ve probably wondered just what goes on in these “encounter cafe’s”. Are they just a systemized way to have a “konpa”? Do they serve young girls with your coffee? Sit back, relax, strap in, and put your tray tables in the upright and locked position because you’re about to embark on a journey to a place that not many gaijin have been allowed to explore. This one’s on the house...

Outside it’s cute and fuzzy characters, but inside its systematic perversion at its best. Imagine a cross between a peep show, a maid cafe and a soapland style “health club”. Nana Cafe and places like it cater to the tastes of men who like their girls young, fresh, and (mostly) underage. It’s a haven for sugar daddies and guys who pop Viagra like candy.

Usually, these kinds of places aren’t really my thing, but journalistic curiosity drove me to take a peek for our readers (...the things I do for you guys...)

The patrons pay an entrance fee to get in, and it quickly becomes apparent, that this place is a “cafe” by name only. Once inside, there are separate rooms: girls hang around in a special “social” room, doing their makeup, gossiping, giggling up a storm, and generally just being young and careless, and having fun. They also get free food (mostly

snacks), and drinks. The patrons are in a special lowered viewing area behind a one-way mirror, where their eyes are about waist level on the girls. This way, they can view the action up close and personal. (The drinks, of course ain’t free) If a guy fancies a certain girl he can let her know through the staff, and if she agrees, they can meet in a private cubicle in a “couples room” to talk for 10min (1,000 yen).

From here it gets interesting. If the guy passes all of the “tests” (vague conversation guided by the girl to gauge job, income level, what car he drives, etc.) then the two “lovebirds” can agree to meet outside the cafe for a “date” all for an extra fee of course, which is “negotiated” between the girl and her customer. This naturally entails him taking her to fancy places, taking her shopping, etc. What happens on these dates is entirely up to the girls (and how much she was offered) They have no obligation to do anything. If the girl agrees, the guy has to fork over 3,000 yen to the Cafe for the priledge of taking his new friend out.

So let’s recap, the guys have to pay for just getting into the place, have to pay extra to get a chance to talk to a girl they fancy, and are expected to take said girl out to expensive places if she agrees to go on a date, for which he has to pay again. And if a sufficient amount of money is forked over to the girl, and she’s so inclined, she might (or might not) offer sexual favours in return.

These guys are getting screwed in every sense of the word. It’s almost like future hostess training camp. Talk about lifetime employment: Start in an Encounter Cafe, and work your way “up” to a Hostess Club.

The reason why so many young girls work there (or rather hang out, as the Cafe puts it), is that they basically get paid just for talking with their friends, and meeting guys. It sounds enticing to young easily impressed minds... Hmm, let’s see, hang out after school in a place

where they can get free food, free drinks, free use of beauty accessories, etc, get to read all the magazines they want, and get paid to talk to guys; or go to Starbuck’s and pay. Yeah, which one would you choose? How else do you think so many girlies can afford those expensive designer clothes and the ubiquitous Luis Vuitton Bags? Is that all that separates these girls from designer clothing bliss? Do sexual activities happen at these places? Are these girls even legal?

Yes and no. Because it’s not a “health club”, the sex-industry laws don’t apply at these places since there are no ‘professional’ hostesses there. These shops are legally seen just as coffee shops, so there are no regulations that prevent people under 18 yrs old from entering them. The Cafes say that it’s none of their concern what happens outside their doors. In other words, there’s the potential for very young girls, some of whom are still in high school, to meet men who are old enough to be their fathers, or even grandfathers easily, and enter into an enjo kosai agreement. In Japanese, enjo kosai means compensated dating and is a major social phenomenon in Japan.

This is voyeuristic materialism taken to the next level. Is having a new Prada Bag really worth selling your soul, so to speak? Most of the girls being targeted for this kind of job are still very young, barely (if at all) legal, and easily sucked into that kind of lifestyle, thinking it’s the quickest way to get good money, which is why most girls who work there don’t seem to mind the job.

Of course, these places are busted from time to time, but another one will just take its place eventually. Currently there are about 100 of these kinds of places in Japan.

So, Should you want to visit Nana Cafe, or its counterparts, bring your Japanese skills, definitely your wallet, and leave your soul at the door, cause it’s not just hot, steamy coffee you’ll find inside...

Nana CafeYou want an underage girl

　　　　　　　　　with your coffee?

| Story and photos by Achim Runnebaum |

|RAN|36

In Japan, there’s a fesitval for everything, right? There’s the naked man festival, several virgin teenage nubile girl festivals,

and even one that celebrates the invention of nihon-shuu. Well we’ve got one that brings all the dogs to our yard, right here in Aichi prefecture. This one celebrates... err.... manhood... Specifically, the one thing men have and women don’t... The dangling part. Man-junk.

Honen matusuri or Harvest festival is a is a fertility festival celebrated in and around Tagata shrine in Komaki every year on March 15th. Like any festival, you have a large number of Shinto priests, traditional Edo-era music, yattai food stalls serving kara-age, kishiyaki and more, and of course spectators like me who turn up with conbini-bought adult beverages, and a good buzz going already. But this is like no other matsuri you’ve ever been to... This is Phallus Phest.

The walk from the train station to the shrine grounds is... Interesting. You’ll notice stands selling all sorts of shlong-inspired wares. A wind up cock with feet. A soft sponge looking peter. There’s one guy who seems to have a hobby by taking driftwood and carving some very realistic renditions of the male appendage. It’s like an outdoor AV shop. The food items even give it a go... Chocolate-covered BANANAS made even more realistic looking with the help of icing... (Why did I see elementary school kids eating them too? Why did I see elementary school kids AT ALL there??)

Then it’s time for the main “attraction”-- The largest pecker you’ve ever seen not attached to a whale. The HUGE shaft is lovingly and carefully crafted in one of two area shrines and makes its way to Tagata Shrine starting at 2pm. It’s carried on a large palanquin and the accomanying entourage passes out plenty of free sake for the spectators. On arrival at Tagata shrine, the huge wooden erection is placed somewhere so women can touch it--this is because it is supposed to help make them fertile... Everyone then gathers in the square outside the shrine and waits for the mochi nage, at which time the crowd is showered with small rice cakes which are thrown down by the officials from raised platforms. The festival concludes at about 4:30 p.m.

A Gathering ofPenises

A Gathering ofPenises

WHEN: March 15th ・ 10am~4pm

WHERE: Tagata Shrine, Komaki City, Aichi

ACCESS: Take Meitetsu Kami-Iida line to Tagata Jinja Mae Sta. Once you exit, just follow the crowds. Plenty of staff on hand to help.

| By J.L. Gatewood |

PHO

TOS:

AD

AM

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It’s fair to say Colin didn’t know what he was getting into when he came to Japan. He didn’t watch anime, he had no interest in judo or karate, and he was far from a connoisseur of Kobe

beef. The only reason he chose Japan over any other country to spend his vacation was because Japan was hosting the FIFA World Cup that year. He came to watch soccer. Somewhere between the first kick and the airport he met somebody and that month-long stay turned into a life commitment that now includes a wife, children and car payments. Maybe Colin had no reason to come, but he certainly has a reason to stay.

The (quite wonderful) fact of the matter is every person on this island chain has their own reason for coming and their own reason for staying. For some people, living in Japan is the fulfillment of their lifelong dreams. For others its the constant reminder of why you ought to practice safe-sex. But the matter of coming and the matter of staying are two very different things and realizing that is perhaps the most crucial point in not only braving the rough waters of daily life, but enjoying the surf.

The difference between flourishing here and just surviving all comes down to the fundamental issue of intent: that is whether you intend to try living in Japan, or you intend to try Japanese life. This will almost surely seem like a semantic triviality but it’s so much more than that. There are far too many people in this city alone who are trying to live as if they just transplanted their life at home into a new context, but their new life is rejecting

the donor. Daily life in Japan is different than life in any other country, and the frustrating thing is that it seems like its not. Certain things will inevitably rub you the wrong way, not because they are inherently bad, but because they are different than what you may be used to. Certain delicate social graces that a native Japanese might take for granted will be completely misunderstood or misinterpreted by a foreigner, but that doesn’t make it a bad thing. This problem is not unique to Japan at all. Living in another place is difficult. Just changing states or provinces in your own country can be surprisingly difficult.

For people with Japanese spouses or families this problem becomes infinitely more frustrating because the native and the foreigner are not on equal footing. The pressures of living in a land where the customs and culture is unfamiliar is very taxing on the nerves, but now the people you turn to are not on your

side. When you are watching the Olympics on TV and you can’t find out who received the gold medal because the Japanese athletes didn’t place, you have nobody to vent to. When your partner’s elderly grandmother insists that sleeping with the fan on will kill you and no amount of medical facts will assuage her, nobody else sees the humor. Any attack on anything Japanese is interpreted as an attack on your partner’s heritage. And before you point the accusing finger consider for a moment how angry it makes you when your husband or wife complains, “all western food is oily and disgusting.” Even though you may happen to agree, you don’t want to be told this by somebody who puts mayonnaise on their pizza or makes spaghetti with ketchup. If the couple were in a country mutually alien to both parties, they might have a grand time of nitpicking every little difference. We all get frustrated and grumble about trivialities, but things can ease-up considerably by a simple change in perspective.

Do you still remember that feeling when you first stepped off that plane. For some it requires a trip in the way-way-back machine, but try to recall those first few months when everything was new and novel. When you still took pictures of the Sakura every spring instead of making fun of the locals for doing it. When you thought the way young girls flirt was naïve and coquettish instead of a form of mental retardation. Before the new car smell faded away and everyone sunk into the mundane routine of it all, life was so exciting and fresh

here in Japan. Keep this much in mind, in the months, years or decades that you have been here, Japan didn’t change as much as you did. That eager attitude of not only accepting the things that are different or new but actually looking forward to them is the secret ingredient to a more fulfilling experience.

Last week my wife put on a germ mask before she went into a veterinarian clinic. I could have called her an obsessive-com-pulsive germophobe but I just smiled and remembered where I live. This is Japan and you came here for a reason. Even if you don’t remember what it was, there are always reasons to stay. Every time I see Buddhist priest on a moped I remember why I like it here. When I see a high school student with an eye-patch carefully applying eye-liner to her one good eye, I smile and accept it. Sometimes the only reaction you have left is laughter, so smile and enjoy the rare adventure you get to experience.

C e r t a i n d e l i c at e s o c i a l g r a c e s t h at a n at i v e J a p a n e s e m i g h t

t a k e f o r g r a n t e d w i l l b e c o m p l e t e l y m i s u n d e r s t o o d o r m i s i n -

t e r p r e t e d b y a f o r e i g n e r , b u t t h at d o e s n ’ t m a k e i t a b a d t h i n g .

Should I Stay or Should I Go?

行くか行かないか | By Adam Pasion |

|RAN|38

|RAN| 39

|RAN|40

Boost your Eye-QFashion

| Text and photos by Achim Runnebaum |

流行

While it seems like most people understand what sunglasses are, the application seems to elude some.Let’s be honest here, there are only three people who can get away with wearing sunglasses at night: The blind, Corey Hart fans, and Jack Nicholson.

|RAN|42

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