This is my second President’s Report and there is little to report that is different to last month. BUT, there is some good news – we are now four weeks closer to being able to hold a General Meeting - the only issue is when.

Thank you to those who have paid the subs for the year. You need to get your payment to us to retain your membership status. It is pleasing to see that the number of financial members is growing, but there are still quite a few outstanding. I am aware that a number of members have paid using direct deposit for the first time – well done. For those who have yet to pay, your current options are Direct Deposit, cheque to the P.O. Box or give cash to another member who is willing to make a Direct Deposit payment on your behalf. If you have made a Direct Debit payment and need to verify that your payment has been received, please give our Treasurer, Keryn a call.

Refunds for cancelled activities are in hand. I ask for your patience as our activity organisers and the Treasurer work towards getting refunds to you as soon as possible, but this does take time.

I want to sincerely thank those members who are contacting other members who are on their own. These are trying times for all of us and this gesture is most welcome. Similarly, if you feel that you need to give someone a call, then why not do so.

Please stay safe and healthy.

John Vickery

President’s Message

PROBUS CLUB OF LEUMEAH COMBINED INC. 9894048

MAY 2020 VOLUME 11 ISSUE 5

PRO BUZZ

Next Meeting:

Later in 2020 ?

All meetings start at 10:15 am

Door Greeters:

Following Month:

Guest Speakers:

Following Month:

Inside this issue:

Tours, Sister Cities 2

Welfare, Treasurer’s

Report 3

Humour 4

Theatre 5

Theatre 6

In Memory of My

Grandmother 7

The Funny Side 8

More Humour 9

Your Committee 10

Events Calendar,

Payments 11

www.leumeahprobus.org.au

P.O. Box 335X LEUMEAH NSW 2560

Deadline for next issue: 4th June, 2020 Email: editor@leumeahprobus.org.au

Private & Confidential for Probus use only.

Not to be used for any other purpose.

There may be need to amend further planned outings as time progresses, depending on Government restrictions. The following information remains current:

Monday 1st June: "Sydney Wildlife Zoo" Cancelled

Monday 29th / Tuesday 30th June: "Yulefest" Medlow Bath Cancelled

Diary Dates:

Monday 3rd August: "Mystery Tour"

Monday 7th September: Club 10th anniversary Lunch at Appin House. (Members only function)

Wednesday 7th October: "Mystery Tour"

November: TBA

Monday 14th December: Xmas Lunch (Wests)

Keep safe & healthy. Hopefully, it won't be too much longer until we can once again enjoy "Fun, Friendship & Fellowship".

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Tours/Activities Ruth Pipet Phone 9603 9896

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The Campbelltown - Koshigaya Sister Cities Assoc. is a community based organisation dedicated to bringing the rich tapestry of Japanese culture to Campbelltown. Our major activities include youth exchange and cultural dis-plays. Founded in 1984 and striving to improve understanding between two different cultures - Campbelltown Park is a large recreational area for relaxing, walking the dog and mild exercise. Similarly Koshigaya Park is a beauti-ful area constantly used for picnics, barbeques and having fun. In 1988 the Koshigaya community built an authentic 16th Century Japanese Tea House as a gift for the bicen-tenary of Australia which stands proudly in the grounds of the Art Gallery and is a popular spot for wedding photos. In response to this generous donation the Campbelltown community gifted a collection of Australian birds and Koshigaya City Office have built a magnificent Campbelltown Forest of Wild Birds aviary opened in 1996 - the largest in Japan. It has now been extended to house wallabies and emus also a gift from Campbelltown. MEETINGS ARE HELD AT 7.30PM ON THE 2ND WEDNESDAY EACH MONTH AT THE COUNCIL STAFF TRAINING CEN-TRE (NEXT TO THE CIVIC CENTRE) FOR 1 HOUR - YOU ARE WELCOME TO COME.

Campbelltown - Koshigaya Sister Cities David Symonds

Page 3

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Hoping all our Probus friends are keeping well and staying warm. We are getting closer to being able to meet up again. In the meantime if you know of anyone who might like a chat or needs a card to cheer them up, please let me know. My mobile hasn’t changed – 0431567820. Happy Birthday to everyone with a birthday in May. Best wishes to all.

Welfare Chesne Patterson

Robin Coleman

Allan Harding

Lynne Hodge

Janette Koelmeyer

Gwen Overton

Ray Pipet

Prue Semple

Bob Tracey

Gail Tyson

Paul Whiting

Treasurer’s Report Keryn Morrison

I will be processing all refunds for cancelled activities during May. Thank you for your patience.

Payment is due for Membership Subscription (SUB) $35.00. As we cannot accept cash at present, there are four options available for payment:

Direct Deposit into the club’s account:

BSB: 814 282 Act No: 50418969

If you are unable to make a Direct Deposit, ask a friend to do it through their account and reimburse them.

3. Go to the CUA branch at Macarthur Square and deposit cash into the club’s account (details above) using your name as the reference number. (CUA is upstairs next to the SANITY store) 4. Pay by cheque and post to:

Probus Club of Leumeah Combined PO Box 335X Leumeah 2560

Page 4

Humour

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Head-nurse Kratchit demonstrates social distancing when applying a suppository

(With Apologies to Pythagoras)

There once were three squaws pregnant at the same time. The child of the first was conceived on a lion hide, The

second child was conceived on a buffalo hide, whilst the third conceived on a hippopotamus hide.

In due course the first gave birth to a son on the lion hide. The second gave birth to a son on the buffalo hide. The

third gave birth to twin sons on the hippopotamus hide.

This proves that the sons of the squaw on the hippopotamus are equal to the sons of the squaws on the other two

hides

Theatre

Page 5

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CRUNCH TIME you will receive a refund

9 to 5 Postponed date may not be until 2021. Our booking cancelled.

You will receive a refund.

A CHORUS LINE Hold onto your tickets. This will be the first

show to reopen the theatre. Your current tickets will be honoured as a

credit. No refunds.

THE CARETAKER Our club has paid a deposit to the theatre.

27 names are down. Watch out for new date.

FROZEN. Disney will not give refunds for our booked date at this

time. Latest is they are “proceeding with their season”

VENUE: Capitol Theatre

DATE: 8th October 2020

TIME: 1.00pm Thursday

AS SITUATIONS CHANGE, YOU WILL BE KEPT

UP TO DATE

Kevin Matthews (02) 4628 6974

theatre@leumeahprobus.org.au

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Theatre (continued)

HAMILTON Coming to Australia in March 2021 at the Sydney Lyric Theatre.

The producer advised on 1st May that he is confident that it will open on

schedule.

“The best Broadway musical of the past 30years” “Revolutionary musi-

cal a thrilling salute to America’s immigrants”

Winner of 11 Tony Awards including Best Musical, 7 Olivier Awards,

Grammy for best musical theatre album, and Pulitzer Award for drama.

Premiered in Broadway 2015 where, up to the virus, could command

ticket prices from US$270 to US$840. Premiered in West End London

in 2017 where, up to the virus, could command prices of up to 250

pounds. Let’s hope that the ticket prices here will be more realistic.

The amazing true story of America’s Founding Father, Alexander

Hamilton. Born penniless out of wedlock in the West Indies. Immigrated

to the US to become a Revolutionary War Hero as George Washing-

ton’s right hand man and was the new nation’s first Treasury Secretary.

He was the genius behind much of America’s government, all before

dying in a duel at age 49 at the hands of the US Vice President.

Hamilton’s score and lyrics are fresh, innovative and catchy. The

soundtrack became the best selling cast album in history.

All citizens of the town of Arnhem where I was born, and subject of the film “A Bridge Too Far” were forcibly

evacuated by German forces in September 1944. At ten months of age I was unaware of the world around me.

However my parents and my father’s sisters travelled together in an effort to find shelter. My late aunt Dinie kept

a diary of those days and recounted their experiences which were ultimately published in a book “Arnhem Spook-

stad” (Arnhem Ghost City). At this time as we celebrate Mothers Day I thought it appropriate to reproduce part of

the story. These are my aunt Dinie’s story and diary notes.

Mother was unaware of the events around her. The aircraft flying overhead and the parachutists landing in the

distance, the family opposite on their balcony shot dead by aggressive Germans, which meant we no longer dared

enter our front room, and had to crawl to reach the toilet – it all passed her by. While we spent the nights awake

and in prayer she sang the nursery rhymes learnt as a toddler. She was suffering from dementia and thus we

hoped to be able to stay in our home.

On Mothers 68th birthday we were ejected with brute force from our home by the Germans. Before we had

reached the end of the street she had already collapsed. After an hour one of our neighbours came to our aid

with a handcart. We laid her on it and so we went in the direction of Huissen. There we went to a cloister which

had been converted to an emergency hospital. There were also some severely wounded German boys, very

young, calling for their mother. We then found shelter with a friendly family. After two weeks we had to leave.

Pa and Mother went by ambulance transport to Barneveld. In wind and weather and on a flat cart they went by

punt to Pannerden whilst there was gunfire across the Rhine. It was the last time I saw my mother. Keeping

contact those days was impossible. We tried a number of times without result. There were after all many thou-

sands living with uncertainty. Even we had no fixed address.

(Dinie, her sister and my parents departed with a group of evacuees to the town of Pannerden where they found

shelter in a school)

The conditions there were horrible. We slept on straw, everyone was covered in vermin, and there were barely

any sanitary arrangements. After a week we travelled on to another school where we stayed for four days. Then

onward again to Hengelo where we were sheltered in a bowling facility. There homesickness struck. Sick with

misery I laid in the straw. On 14th December came news from the Red Cross; Mother had passed away on

24th October. I felt totally empty and intensely sad. The time of uncertainty had passed, but there had been hope.

Now there was the hard truth. Although she barely knew me the last few years, now I no longer had a mother.

Page 7

In Memory of My Grandmother Wim Reyntjes

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Page 8

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Half of us are going to come out of this quarantine as amazing cooks. The other half will come out with a

drinking problem.

I used to spin that toilet paper like I was on Wheel of Fortune. Now I turn it like I'm cracking a safe.

I need to practice social-distancing from the refrigerator.

Still haven't decided where to go for Easter …...The Living Room or The Bedroom.

PSA: every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pyjamas will have you believe all is well in

the kingdom.

Home schooling is going well. 2 students suspended for fighting and 1 teacher fired for drinking on the

job.

I don't think anyone expected that when we changed the clocks we'd go from Standard Time to the

Twilight Zone.

This morning I saw a neighbour talking to her cat. It was obvious she thought her cat understood her.

I came into my house, told my dog..... we laughed a lot.

So, after this quarantine.....will the producers of My 600 Pound Life just find me or do I find them?

Quarantine Day 5: Went to this restaurant called THE KITCHEN. You have to gather all the ingredients and

make your own meal. I have no clue how this place is still in business.

My body has absorbed so much soap and disinfectant lately that when I pee it cleans the toilet.

Day 5 of Home schooling: One of these little monsters called in a bomb threat.

I'm so excited --- it's time to take out the garbage. What should I wear?

Classified Ad: Single man with toilet paper seeks woman with hand sanitizer for good clean fun.

Day 6 of Home schooling: My child just said "I hope I don't have the same teacher next year".... I'm

offended.

Better 6 feet apart than 6 feet under.

The Funny Side Lyn Dumont

Page 9

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THREE BLONDES (contributed by John Vickery)

Three Blondes were all applying for the last available position on the Texas Highway Patrol. The detective con-

ducting the interview looked at the three of them and said, 'So y'all want to be cops, huh? 'The blondes all nodded.

The detective got up, opened a file drawer and pulled out a folder. Sitting back down, he opened it and pulled out

a photograph, and said, 'To be a detective, you have to be able to detect. You must be able to notice things such as

distinguishing features and oddities such as scars and so forth. 'So saying, he stuck the photo in the face of the first

blonde and withdrew it after about two seconds. 'Now,' he said, 'did you notice any distinguishing features about

this man? 'The blonde immediately said, 'Yes, I did He has only one eye! 'The detective shook his head and said, 'Of

course he has only one eye in this picture! It's a profile of his face! You're dismissed!' The first blonde hung her

head and walked out of the office.

The detective then turned to the second blonde, said, 'What about you? Notice anything unusual or outstanding

about this man? ''Yes! He only has one ear!' The detective put his head in his hands and exclaimed, 'Didn't you

hear what I just told the other lady? This is a profile of the man's face! Of course you can only see one ear!! You're

excused too! 'The second blonde sheepishly walked out of the office.

The detective turned his attention to the third and last blonde and said, 'This is probably a waste of time, but ... He

flashed the photo in her face for a couple of seconds and withdrew it, saying, 'All right, did you notice anything dis-

tinguishing or unusual about this man? 'The blonde said, 'I sure did. This man wears contact lenses. 'The detective

frowned, took another look at the picture and began looking at some of the papers in the folder. He looked up at

the blonde with a puzzled expression and said, 'You're absolutely right! His bio says he wears contacts! How in the

world could you tell that by looking at his picture? 'The blonde rolled her eyes and said, 'Well, Helloooo! With only

one eye and one ear, he certainly can't wear glasses.'

Page 10

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Your Committee

Position Name Telephone

President John Vickery 0431 458 001

Vice President Lyn Dumont 4634 1348

Past President Janette Koelmeyer 0415 257 807

Secretary Robyn Donney 0408 411 262

Asst Secretary Robyn Bugeja 4625 4767

Treasurer Keryn Morrison 0452 417 286

Asst Treasurer Glenys Dudley 4628 5775

Editor Stephen Bailey 0468 791 690

Website Stephen Bailey 0468 791 690

Tours Ruth Pipet 9603 9896

Membership Di Broadfoot 0412 637 080

Hospitality John White 4625 1091

Welfare Chesne Patterson 0431 567 820

Guest Speakers Gwen Overton 4625 0777

Attendance Jacqui Webber 0419 161 530

Page 11

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Events Calendar

EVENT DAY/DATE COST PAYMENT BY * CODE

Wildlife Sydney Zoo Mon 1 June, 2020 Cancelled

“Yulefest” at Medlow Bath Mon/Tues 29-30 June Cancelled

9 to 5 the musical Wed 3 June, 2020 Cancelled

The Caretaker 21 July, 2020 Postponed

Club’s 10th Anniversary Lunch Mon 7 September, 2020

(NEW DATE) Already all paid

Disney’s FROZEN the musical Thu 8 October, 2020 Closed

* These (meeting) dates are the deadline for cash/cheque

payments. Direct Deposit payments are due by the Tuesday

preceding the Monthly General Meeting.

Payments

You can pay for activities by Direct Deposit to:

BSB: 814282 Account No: 50418969

Detail your deposit as follows:

Outing Code Surname Initials

Example:

FT Smith JW

(Fawlty Towers Smith John & Wendy)