Positive Positive Communication:Communication:

Making Our Making Our Interactions WorkInteractions Work

Presented by:Presented by:MCPS Employee Assistance ProgramMCPS Employee Assistance Program

240-314-1040240-314-1040

OutcomesOutcomes Learn the STARR model for Learn the STARR model for

communicating in a positive waycommunicating in a positive way

Understand the physiological impact Understand the physiological impact of stress of stress

Know effective listening and Know effective listening and speaking skills speaking skills

STARRSTARR PowerPower SSTOPTOP and breathe and breathe TTHINKHINK through your optionsthrough your options AACTCT with positive with positive

communicationcommunication RRESPECTESPECTyourself and the other person yourself and the other person RRECHARGEECHARGE take care of yourselftake care of yourself

SStoptop

Take a Deep Take a Deep BreathBreath

SStoptop

TThink Before You Acthink Before You Act Is this important ?Is this important ? Are you ready to listen ?Are you ready to listen ? Are you labeling the person ? Are you labeling the person ? How would you feel if you wereHow would you feel if you were in the other person’s shoes ?in the other person’s shoes ?

SStoptopTThinkhink AAct with Positive ct with Positive CommunicationCommunication

Active Listening Skills Active Listening Skills combine listening and talking combine listening and talking skills so that the other person skills so that the other person

feels understoodfeels understood

Pop QuizPop Quiz Most of us are distracted about _____% of Most of us are distracted about _____% of

the time we think we are listening.the time we think we are listening.

Right after we listen to someone, we recall Right after we listen to someone, we recall about ______% of what he or she has said.about ______% of what he or she has said.

Long-term we recall ____% of what we hear.Long-term we recall ____% of what we hear.

_____ % of our communication is conveyed _____ % of our communication is conveyed non-verbally.non-verbally.

*International Listening Association*International Listening Association

AnswersAnswers Most of us are distracted about Most of us are distracted about _75%_75% of the of the time we think we are listening.time we think we are listening. Right after we listen to someone, we recall Right after we listen to someone, we recall

about about __50%50% of what he or she has said. of what he or she has said. Long-term, we recall Long-term, we recall 20%20% of what we hear. of what we hear.

70%70% of our communication is conveyed of our communication is conveyed non-verballynon-verbally

*International Listening Association*International Listening Association

Listening ExerciseListening Exercise

Active Listening Active Listening SkillsSkills Body LanguageBody Language Door OpenersDoor Openers ParaphrasingParaphrasing ReflectingReflecting

““YouYou” ” MessagesMessages vs vs ““II” ” MessagesMessages Why did you…?Why did you…? You You alwaysalways or or

never never . . .. . . Yes, but you . . .Yes, but you . . . It’s your fault!It’s your fault! How come you…? How come you…? You made me You made me

angryangry

I hear . . .I hear . . . I feel . . .I feel . . . I want . . .I want . . . I need . . .I need . . . I don’t understand I don’t understand I’m wondering I’m wondering

about…about…

Reframing Reframing “You”“You” MessagesMessages

You are always asking me to do You are always asking me to do extra work and it is making me extra work and it is making me fall behind.fall behind.

Reframing Reframing “You”“You” MessagesMessages

You complain about every You complain about every little thing I do and never little thing I do and never seem satisfied with my work.seem satisfied with my work.

SStoptopTThinkhink AActct

RRespectespectRespect Yourself and Respect Yourself and the Other Personthe Other Person

SStoptopTThinkhink AActctRRespectespect

RRecharge!echarge!

Biodot Color KeyBiodot Color KeyMore Relaxed

Less Relaxed

MCPS EAPMCPS EAP Assessment, short term counseling,Assessment, short term counseling, and referraland referral Confidentiality/recordsConfidentiality/records Other services: workshops, crisis Other services: workshops, crisis responseresponse Access point for mediationAccess point for mediation

Thanks for coming!Thanks for coming!

For more information about the EAP, For more information about the EAP, contact us at contact us at 240-314-1040240-314-1040

or visit our website ator visit our website atwww.montgomeryschoolsmd.org/departments/eawww.montgomeryschoolsmd.org/departments/eapp