Fingers wearing his Tuba Christmas hat

Tuba Christmas is a more recent addition to the lists of traditions observed by the Purdue University tubas. Tuba Christmas is an event in December where tuba players and baritone players gather from all over, playing a concert of Christmas carols. Many of the particiapants have never met before and will never meet again, but they come to-gether anyway and rehearse a few hours before they perform for a live audience. Tuba Christmas was started in 1974 in honor of William J. Bell, born on Christmas day of 1902. Purdue University began hosting Bell, born on Christmas day of 1902. Purdue University began hosting and participating in Tuba Christmas 4 or 5 years ago, and will most likely continue to be a part of the lives of Purdue tubas and alumni every December for many years to come.

Kira and Fingers participating in a time-honored tradition of the AAMB Toobah SectionOne of the oldest and most beloved traditions in the All-American Marching Band’s toobah section is know by one simple word: “SATCHEL!”. None of the alumni to whom I have spoken can remember a time without the satchel, nor can the remem-ber where it began. The tradition of satcheling is very simply carried on. One member of the toobah section makes a fist, targets another toobah member, and yells, “SATCHEL,” after which they have five seconds to connect that fist with the targeted toobah member’s testicles. The satchelee is allowed to block or evade the satcheller’s assault, as long as no physical harm comes to the satcheller. The only satcheller’s assault, as long as no physical harm comes to the satcheller. The only satchel which can be carried out using anything but a fist is the legendary Double-Footed Meleé Satchel, which consists of the satcheller jumping and connecting both feet, at the same time, with the satchelee’s testicles. Needless to say, there is a female form of the satchel, though it involves no violence. However, the procedure for the female satchel is a closely guarded secret known only to the toobah section leader, and has not been knowingly acheived in written or spoken band-lore.

Toobah Hail, at women’s basketball

A quite entertaining tradition of the Purdue Tubas (more inclusive term than “toobah” because it is not limited to members of the AAMB) is called Tuba Hail. Played only at women’s basketball games, Tuba Hail is a very dramatic version of Hail Purdue, which starts with a slow tuba soli playing the chorus of Hail Purdue. The band iterrupts the tubas twice, until the tubas suddenly play faster and run left in one big circle. Then, the music slows, the tubas stop moving, and bend over backward, with the ultimate goal of getting the bell of the toobah as close to the court as possible, even trying to touch it. Few can say they’ve succeeded in the court as possible, even trying to touch it. Few can say they’ve succeeded in their endeavor of flexibility. The fans love this tradition, and cheer for the tubas as they attempt to imitate a cephalopod in an amazing back-bending feat. The crowd even gives sympathy cheers to the tubas who fall whilst trying to defy their spinal column. Tuba Hail often even gets the opposing teams’ fans cheering. This is one of my favorite traditions to continue.

Epic Toobah section photo

In my section, we do not play sousaphones. We call our instruments and our-selves “Toobahs”, due to experiences regarding insults thrown at us by Indiana University fans about our toobahs. Toobah, therefore, is not a misspelling, but a way of life for the Purdue University Toobah Section. Toobah tradition dic-tates that within the first week of band in the Summer, commonly referred to as “band camp”, each new member of the section is given a nickname. To avoid legal confrontations, if one is offended by one’s assigned nickname, one is allowed to request an alternative, though this has never happened in the history of the toobah section. The All-American Marching Band Toobahs from 2010 are as fol-lows: Lunchbox, High Life, Fingers, Klepticus Maximus (Klepty), Aftershock, MFS, Myaaaat Dwason, Roach, Trebek, Gump (me), OPS, Flossie, Captain Karma, Tetons, Cracker, Watergate, [Insert Name Here] Lee, Woody, Shaggy, Tiberious, and Fergie.