PASSION 2006 CONFERENCENashville, Tennessee

Day 1(January 1, 2006)

Woke up to sauerkraut at Oma's, followed by some packing for Nashville.Around 7, Anne came over, we checked out the conference website forschedules / bands / speakers, then left for Applebee's before rendezvousing forthe trip.

[insert pounding chest]

We get there, order, and finally meet clarity. The terms of the relationship werelaid out on the table, and there was brutal honesty and many emotions. Anneand I are not together, and there is no confusion as to that now. A very importanttalk, Anne eventually pulled herself together enough to register for the trip afterseveral hours on the verge of breakdown.

[wait 4 hours for departure]

We leave Akron, OH, for Nashville, TN. I take sleeping pills and have anexcellent (and refreshing) 8-hour coma.

Day 2

I wake up downtown, and I'm soon in a room with Joe Tucker and Mike Smith,unpacking. We head out for the Gaylord Arena (Nashville's Gund) and join10,000+ people packed on a single city block to register and get tickets.

[standing in lines until 7pm]

Enter Gaylord Arena. Occupancy at 18,000.

So much energy. This night was one of the best nights of my life. Maybe Ishould say that again. Basically, you put 18,000 college students who all loveJesus into a room, and sparks start to fly. So loud. So excited. So energized.

Later on, despite extreme tiredness and feeling like I was going to pass out, Iheaded down to the Municipal Auditorium to see David Crowder perform. I didn’twant to do anything but sleep. I didn’t want to stand in line with another 6,000+pack. But I did. And it was the best time of the entire trip.

David Crowder is a used-to-be-stoner, then he started a relationship with Jesus,started making music professionally, and became one of the biggest artists in hisgenre. Actually, I don’t know if that’s accurate, but I am damn near positive heused to smoke, or something. He talks about being in love with Jesus likebuzzing really high. One of his songs is called “Intoxicating.” In another, he endsthe song repeating, “I am so high. I am so high. I am so high.” Anyway, he hasan incredible amount of energy and put on an awesome show. I had manymoments when I connected with my God. Very powerful. Very up.

Check out codicil to hear a song by him about reckless abandon and joy.

So that was the best night of the trip, Day 2. Completely moving. Completelyoverwhelming. I was ready to go home, but there was more.

Day 3

Wake up way too early (8am), and go to our Community Group meeting, of whichI was elected leader of the last night. Oh yeah, I forgot that. I was elected“leader” of a smaller group that meets twice daily. The purpose of CommunityGroups was to downsize the massive conference to a manageable andpersonable group where learning, support, and growth could realistically occurover the course of the week. Responsibilities of being a “leader” basicallyinvolved showing up 15 minutes early to Community Groups and making surethat conversation with our 8-person group stayed on track. No problem.

So we do Community Group, I really like my group, and we leave for the Arena.

[awesome time of learning and worship, but nothing compared to last night]

[lunch, listen to afternoon speaker talk about some deep stuff, wade through thecrowds to get tickets for concerts that night, eat dinner]

7pm: second Arena meeting. A woman speaker (a nice change) and worship

10pm: Community Group meeting

11pm: Go to two concerts, decide that I would really rather sleep than anythingelse, though both were good. Sing It Is Well With My Soul very loudly beforedoing so.

Day 4

9am: Community Group

10:30am: Arena

12pm: lunch

2pm: Afternoon speaker, Tim Hughes, talks about leading worship. Favorite talkof the trip, hands down. Very funny style, likeable guy, thick British accent, lotsof stories, practical advice, and a good time. Not serious at all, but definitely myfavorite speaker. Definitely applicable to my life and what I do.

7pm: Arena. Off the hook. Passion conference president spoke, and he used anamazing multimedia demonstration about the wonder and vastness of the

universe [insert one hour of dropped jaw] and ended with a heart-stopping turn tothe ultimate sacrifice that same God made for us by dying in our place. Eye-opening. Made me want to thank God to ridiculous levels. Wanted to hang onthat cross instead of him, but knew I wouldn’t even be good enough to pay theconsequences of my own fuckups, let alone those of the world. Don’t understandwhy he did what he did. So glad he did. Dumfounded by true love.

10pm: Community Group

11pm: Arena for “latenight.” So exciting- they did night worship! Ok, backtrack:on the way to the Arena, everyone was asked to walk silently from acrossdowntown Nashville into the Arena. So I kid you not, thousands of collegestudents walked silently into the Arena at 11 o’clock at night. Silently. It was theweirdest and most unique thing I had seen in a long time. 5th Avenue wascompletely packed, including sidewalks and all traffic lanes, full of collegestudents who didn’t make a sound except walking noises. Everyone entered theArena silently, and eventually the presentation started, except this time- without asound.

A typewriter typed words across the screen and led the entire auditorium formore than a half-hour without a single sound. After that, intermittently, an artistwould play a song, or someone would act something out, but the screen-led nightworship continued for another hour. Finally, tension was released and after anexplanation of the salvation message, we partied. Quite literally, I mean, thesong we sang was called, “Party.” And we sang it. and partied. and screamed.and probably maxed out at 140 decibels, which basically is like standing next to ashuttle launch. and we kept singing. and there were lots of lights. and lots ofmotion. and lots of dancing. and we screamed our heads off until way into themorning, when we finally went to bed. What an incredible night.

Day 5

Pack up hotel room, go to Community Group, and head off for the final meetingat the Arena.

I wasn’t expecting much, perhaps a kind “thanks for coming” and some farewelltidings. Complete surprise.

Louie Giglio, leader of Passion, spoke again, but in a much different way thanever before. He talked about jeans. A little bit about architecture, too. He saidthat no matter what we do in life, whether we’re serving bowls of soup to starvingrefugees or making designer pants for boutiques, we can serve God withintegrity, sincerity, purpose, and passion. Whatever the call of the 18,000 collegestudents, there are people to be served, a world in need, and the power of Godto help us along the way, however we lived out our specific lives. Veryuncharacteristic of many speakers who don’t understand how you can love Godand people but do accounting for a living. It’s possible, and completelyawesome.

Then came worship. But this time, it wasn’t just the biggest names performing onstage. There was a new element.

Throughout the week, students had been drawing on white canvases withhighlighters in a graffiti gallery. This was part of the Passion hub in the basementof the Nashville Convention Center. So they had taken these canvases, sewnthem together, and hoisted them onto gigantic cranes that could raise them up insynchrony from the ceiling of the Arnea. So, as they were when we entered, theywere folded on the stage, not visible.

During a climactic moment in the music, however, the cranes started lifting, andthe canvases became a huge cube, rising from the four sides of the square,omni-directional stage in the center of the Arena. With only white lights hittingthe canvases, the audience could eventually read what was never legible before:the canvases spelled out the word “GLORIOUS.” Funny, we happened to besinging a song with the same title at the time this all was happening.

[amazed at the awesome size of the canvas cube rising nearly 100 feet]

Then, the lights switched to blacklight, and the highlighter marks were revealed.Thousands of inscriptions about life, God, Jesus, emotions, jokes, pictures,poems, verses… they all became visible and were projected onto the screens.An incredible moment. Maybe a picture would help…

[prayed, loaded vans, came home]

What did I learn?

God is awesome, whether or not we feel it. God is the same (i.e. perfect) always.He never changes. He doesn’t move, or become “more distant.” It’s me. It’s us.He is great and glorious. He is beyond anything we could ever imagine. He putsmeaning back into that phrase.

Someone died for me. I deserve to die, stay dead, and pay the consequences ofmy actions here on earth. But over 2,000 years ago, God became man and wasmurdered for no just cause- only to pay the penalty I should have paid. This isthe free gift- someone else jumped in front of the oncoming car and pushed youout of the way. Except in this case, he didn’t stay dead. He returned to life, and Iwill be with him forever in paradise some day; not because I deserve to be there,but because he offers it to me freely, illogically, and wonderfully. This gift is forall people. I wish they understood this.

I should talk to this God more. I should read his book more. I should stopfucking up so much.

I need passion. I need wonder and excitement. I want my other friends to befriends with Jesus and understand what it means to be unconditionally loved.God is completely amazing. I love him so much. He loves me more. And you.