Parenting and Development. Parenting Diana Baumrind

Parenting and DevelopmentParenting and Development

ParentingParenting

Diana Baumrind

Dimensions of ParentingDimensions of Parenting

1. Punitiveness


1. Punitiveness

2. Withdrawal of Love


1. Punitiveness


3. Encourages give-and-take


1. Punitiveness



4. Demandingness


1. Punitiveness



4. Demandingness

5. Restricts Autonomy


1. Punitiveness



4. Demandingness


6. High Power


1. Punitiveness



4. Demandingness


6. High Power

7. Firm Control

Authoritarian

Punitive varies

Love w/drawal varies

Give & take low

Demands high

Autonomy low

Exerts power high

Firm control high

What does the Authoritarian parent What does the Authoritarian parent

do?do?

• Attempts to shape, control, and evaluate the child’s behavior and attitudes based on the parent’s own set of standards, which are usually rigid and absolute

• Values obedience, believes in keeping the child in his/her place and in restricting the child's autonomy

• Does not encourage verbal give-and-take; believes child should take the parent's word for what’s right

Authoritarian Permissive

Punitive varies low

Love w/drawal varies varies

Give & take low high

Demands high low

Autonomy low high

Exerts power high low

Firm control high low

What does the Permissive parent What does the Permissive parent

do?do?

• Consults with the child about all decisions• Makes few demands regarding chores &

responsibilities• Does not view herself as a resource as an active

agent responsible for shaping or changing the child's behaviors

• Allows child to regulate own activities• Avoids exercising control

Authoritarian Permissive Authoritative

Punitive varies low low

Love w/drawal varies varies low

Give & take low high high

Demands high low moderate

Autonomy low high moderate

Exerts power high low moderate

Firm control high low high

What does the Authoritative parent do?What does the Authoritative parent do?

• Encourages verbal give-and-take

• Shares with child the reasons behind expectations and rules

• Values both autonomy and disciplined conformity

• Exerts consistent and firm, but not excessive, control

• Affirms child's qualities but sets standards of behavior

• Does not base decisions solely on child's desires

outcomes of outcomes of authoritarian parentingauthoritarian parenting

• low social & cognitive competence• low self-esteem• little initiative• anxious, withdrawn• when frustrated, respond with hostility• boys: anger and defiance• girls: dependence and retreat from challenge

if authoritarian and punitive: more severe problems

outcomes of outcomes of permissive parentingpermissive parenting

• immature

• low impulse control

• little responsibility

• little independence

• disobedient of demands that conflict with own desires

• demanding of adults

• aggression

outcomes of outcomes of authoritative parentingauthoritative parenting

• high social and cognitive competence• self-reliant, self-controlled• moral maturity• girls: high achievement orientation• boys: high social cooperation

Responsiveness

LOW HIGH

Demandingness

LOW Neglecting Permissive

HIGH Authoritarian Authoritative

Neglecting/Uninvolved ParentingNeglecting/Uninvolved Parenting

• Low responsiveness • Low demandingness/control • May be neglectful • Sometimes related to parental depression

• Outcomes: antisocial behavior, poor self-regulation, low academic and social competence

Effective versus ineffective discipline strategies

Effective Remain CalmPick battlesNegotiate from a position of authorityBe authoritative, but respect the child’s

autonomyBe consistentBe contingent

Ineffective Harsh language or behaviorPersonal attacksThreats (particularly idle threats)Lack of follow throughPermissivenessLong winded explanations

Responding to negative emotions

Anger, Fear, Hurt/Disappointment

• Reinforce the distinction between words and actions

• Do not negate or suppress the expression of negative emotions in pro-social ways

• Contain and withstand child’s emotions

Parent ChildParent Child

• Child’s temperament influences parental behaviors.



• Child’s characteristics influence outcomes of discipline.




• Parents tend to parent different children differently





• Parents of hyperactive children change their parenting style when their children go on medication.





• Parents of hyperactive children change their parenting style when their children go on medication.

Not a unidirectional relation!

The Transition to Parenthood:

Preparing for a chronic emergency

Transition to ParenthoodTransition to Parenthood

• Cross-sectional Studies– marital satisfaction declines over the first 15

years of marriage

– similar curves for parents and non-parents, but childless couples tend to be more satisfied

– U shaped curve (but least satisfied couples may have divorced…)

Transition to ParenthoodTransition to Parenthood

• Longitudinal Studies– marital satisfaction declines after birth of baby

• lack of comparison group of childless couples

– continuity over time in new parents’ marital quality

• babies don’t appear to create severe stress where it was not present before

• initially, babies do not bring parents closer together

a normal consequence of the a normal consequence of the transition to parenthood is transition to parenthood is

polarizationpolarization

Changes in…Changes in…

• identity and inner life



• the roles and relationships within the marriage




• the three-generational roles and relationships





• roles and relationships outside of the family





• roles and relationships outside of the family

• new parenting roles and expectations

Factors that affect the quality of the couple relationship during the transition

• Capacity to balance individuality and mutuality


• Capacity to balance individuality and mutuality• Communication skills of both parents


• Capacity to balance individuality and mutuality• Communication skills of both parents• Realistic expectations about what the baby will

bring



bring• Division of labor in ways that are consistent with

both parents’ beliefs



bring• Division of labor in ways that are consistent with

both parents’ beliefs• Conflict management skills (regulation of affect)

Marriage is a developmental Marriage is a developmental phenomenon rooted in the phenomenon rooted in the

individual’s early family individual’s early family experienceexperience

Marital satisfaction Marital satisfaction affects parental competenceaffects parental competence

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Parenting and Development. Parenting Diana Baumrind