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Paralysing Power of Perfectionism Matthew Hoelscher [email protected] m

Paralyzing Power Of Perfectionism

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Page 1: Paralyzing Power Of Perfectionism

Paralysing Power of Perfectionism

Matthew Hoelscher

[email protected]

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SMILE!

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If one person can learn to do something, anyone can learn to do it.

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Perfectionism

Who is a Perfectionist?

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Albert Ellis, PH.D.

"How to Control your Anxiety before it Controls You"

"The Myth of Self-Esteem"

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MUSTerbation

"Since it's so awful to fail, that means that I absolutely must succeed and that I'm a thoroughly inadequate person if I do not!

"Because unfortunate things keep happening to me, they'll continually happen and make me miserable."

"Because I failed pretty miserably at this important project, that means that I'll always fail and never succeed at important things."

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Prefrences Become Musts

Musts, Shoulds, Oughts, DemandsAbsolute AutonomyUnmitigated Love

Complete GratificationGuarantees

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If one person can learn to do something, anyone can learn to do it.

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Freedom

ACT

Awareness

Choice

Trust

STOP

Step Back

Think

Organize

Proceed

Universal Acceptance

Self

Others

Life

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Self Esteem

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Unconditional Self-Acceptance

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Alfred Korzybski

"I am many of my feelings and actions, but not any

one of them."

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Unconditional Other-Acceptance

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Unconditional Life-Acceptance

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Acceptance

1. Accept the unpleasantness of mistakes and failures  

2. Accept the frustrations of other people stopping you

3. Accept the blocks to your desire that events put in your way

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Relasping

1. Acknowledge your relapsing  

2. Thoroughly accept yourself, your being, with your lapses

3. Look for the Irrational Beliefs (IBs) that led to the relapse

4. Dispute your IBs vigorously and persistently

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If one person can learn to do something, anyone can learn to do it.

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Tim Gallway: "Inner Game of Stress"

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ACT

Awareness

Choice 

Trust

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Awareness

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Choice

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Trust

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If one person can learn to do something, anyone can learn to do it.

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Step Back

Think 

Organize

Proceed

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Step Back

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Think

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Organize

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Proceed

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Freedom

ACT

Awareness

Choice

Trust

STOP

Step Back

Think

Organize

Proceed

Universal Acceptance

Self

Others

Life

Page 45: Paralyzing Power Of Perfectionism
Page 46: Paralyzing Power Of Perfectionism

If one person can learn to do something, anyone can learn to do it.

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Paralyzing Power of Perfectionism

Matthew Hoelscher

[email protected]

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Title: Paralyzing Power of Perfectionism

Matthew (hole-sure) Hoelscher is the President of Miami Executive Coach. He is a member of the International Coaching Federation (ICF). Matthew has twelve (12) years of sales and five (5) years of product marketing experience. He earned a Bachelor's Degree in Liberal Studies from Iowa State University. He graduated from the University of Miami's Proficient Coaching program. He has been a member of Toastmasters International for 5 years. He has been married for seven (7) years to a feisty woman from Argentina and has 4-year-old fraternal twin boys. He enjoys reading over 50 books a year, scuba diving, and photography above and below the water. After coaching his executive clients he found a pattern of perfectionism that was paralyzing them and keeping them from moving forward. Today will learn how to navigate around these pitfalls.Please help me welcome Matthew (hole-sure) Hoelscher....