220179206 D G Tharindu (HSNS264) Assignment-Part A.pdf

by Tharindu Dushyantha Dewalegama Gamacharige

Submission date: 23-Apr-2018 01:32PM (UTC+1000)Submission ID: 951642479File name:140127_Tharindu_Dushyantha_Dewalegama_Gamacharige_220179206_D_G_Tharindu__HSNS_264__Assign.pdfWord count: 1711Character count: 9806

Paper Reviewed by Dr Z Smith U/C

Reference needed

Reference needed

Reference needed

Reference needed

Good

Reference needed

Reference needed Poorly worded

Conjunct ionJoin sentences

Reference needed

Reference needed

Join sentences

Reference needed

Join sentences

Author

Join sentences

Reference needed

Author

--------, this

Author

Reference needed

Author

1

Unnecessary informat ion

Dif ferent Font

Reference St ructure Protocols

18%SIMILARITY INDEX

9%INTERNET SOURCES

6%PUBLICATIONS

16%STUDENT PAPERS

1 6%

2 3%

3 2%

4 2%

5 1%

6 1%

7 1%

8 1%

9 1%

220179206 D G Tharindu (HSNS 264) Assignment-Part A.pdfORIGINALITY REPORT

PRIMARY SOURCES

Submitted to University of New EnglandStudent Paper

Submitted to Australian Catholic UniversityStudent Paper

Submitted to Bridgepoint EducationStudent Paper

"Allergy and Asthma", Springer Nature, 2016Publicat ion

www.tandfonline.comInternet Source

Submitted to Flinders UniversityStudent Paper

Submitted to University of Western SydneyStudent Paper

Submitted to McMaster UniversityStudent Paper

Submitted to Kaplan UniversityStudent Paper

www.cen.ulaval.ca

10 1%

Exclude quotes Of f

Exclude bibliography Of f

Exclude matches Of f

Internet Source

QM

QM

QM

QM

QM

FINAL GRADE

21/25

220179206 D G Tharindu (HSNS 264) Assignment-Part A.pdfGRADEMARK REPORT

GENERAL COMMENTS

InstructorD G Tharindu

You have covered most of the pathophysiology ofasthma and Zach's signs and symptoms.Unf ortunately, some of your inf ormation was toogeneral and some areas need more specif ic detail.

There are a f ew structural issues throughout yourassignment, and there were some problems withyour ref erencing.

Please ref er to the notes and quickmarks in yourassignment.

Overall well done.Debra

PAGE 1

Paper Reviewed by Dr Z Smith U/C

Paper Reviewed by Dr Z Smith U/C

PAGE 2

Reference neededWhenever you are making a statement about something, such as the one here, you need toref erence it. You need to make sure that the reader understands how you know thisinf ormation.

Reference neededWhenever you are making a statement about something, such as the one here, you need toref erence it. You need to make sure that the reader understands how you know thisinf ormation.

Reference neededWhenever you are making a statement about something, such as the one here, you need toref erence it. You need to make sure that the reader understands how you know thisinf ormation.

Reference needed

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Whenever you are making a statement about something, such as the one here, you need toref erence it. You need to make sure that the reader understands how you know thisinf ormation.

GoodGood inf ormation.

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Reference neededWhenever you are making a statement about something, such as the one here, you need toref erence it. You need to make sure that the reader understands how you know thisinf ormation.

Reference neededWhenever you are making a statement about something, such as the one here, you need toref erence it. You need to make sure that the reader understands how you know thisinf ormation.

Poorly wordedThis is poorly worded and a litt le bit hard to understand, it would be better if it was slightlyreworded.

ConjunctionDo not start sentences with conjunctions ie. words such as but, because, and, f or, yet, so, or.

Join sentencesThese sentences should be joined, and made into one sentence.

Reference neededWhenever you are making a statement about something, such as the one here, you need toref erence it. You need to make sure that the reader understands how you know thisinf ormation.

Reference neededWhenever you are making a statement about something, such as the one here, you need toref erence it. You need to make sure that the reader understands how you know thisinf ormation.

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Join sentencesThese sentences should be joined, and made into one sentence.

Reference neededWhenever you are making a statement about something, such as the one here, you need toref erence it. You need to make sure that the reader understands how you know this

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inf ormation.

Join sentencesThese sentences should be joined, and made into one sentence.

AuthorYou need to ref erence the author not the tit le.

Join sentencesThese sentences should be joined, and made into one sentence.

Reference neededWhenever you are making a statement about something, such as the one here, you need toref erence it. You need to make sure that the reader understands how you know thisinf ormation.

AuthorYou need to ref erence the author not the tit le.

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Text Comment. - - - - ----

Text Comment. , this

AuthorYou need to ref erence the author not the tit le.

Reference neededWhenever you are making a statement about something, such as the one here, you need toref erence it. You need to make sure that the reader understands how you know thisinf ormation.

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AuthorYou need to ref erence the author not the tit le.

Comment 1Why is this in capitals?

Unnecessary informationThe inf ormation contained here is unnecessary. As you have limited words it is important toalways try to f ocus on what inf ormation is the most relevant. Preservation of word count tomaximise the strength of your assignment can sometimes be crucial.

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Dif ferent FontWhy is this in a dif f erent f ont/colour. This tends to happen when you copy and paste. Makesure that everything is in the same f ont and colour prior to submitt ing to maintain consistency.

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Reference Structure ProtocolsRef erences should always f ollow a standard structure of :

Author. (Year). T it le, Source.

Books need to have the Town, Country: Publisher at the end of the ref erence.

Journal articles should include the name of the journal article, issue, volume, pages and doi.

Websites need the f ull URL, not just the homepage.

If you are cit ing a website and there is no author then the website becomes the author.If there is no year f or when the website was updated then you should use the year that youaccessed the website.

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RUBRIC: HSNS264_T12018A3A

CRITERIA 1 (40%)

HD(100)

HD(95)

HD(85)

D(80)

D(75)

C(70)

C(65)

P(60)

P(55)

P(50)

N(45)

N(40)

N(35)

CRITERIA 2 (40%)

HD(100)

HD

82 / 100

85 / 100

Content and f ocus\nDemonstrates an understanding of Asthma pathophysiology

Discussion successf ully demonstrates supported and substantial arguments andideas;<br />Paper thoroughly reviews and integrates current and relevant literature

Discussion successf ully demonstrates supported and substantial arguments andideas;<br />Paper thoroughly reviews and integrates current and relevant literature

Discussion successf ully demonstrates supported and substantial arguments andideas;<br />Paper thoroughly reviews and integrates current and relevant literature

Discussion demonstrates supported and substantial arguments and ideas with onlyminor digressions;<br />Paper suf f iciently reviews and integrates current and relevantliterature

Discussion demonstrates supported and substantial arguments and ideas with onlyminor digressions;<br />Paper suf f iciently reviews and integrates current and relevantliterature

Discussion demonstrates supported and substantial arguments and ideas with somedigression;<br />Paper reviews and integrates current and relevant literature

Discussion demonstrates supported and substantial arguments and ideas with somedigression;<br />Paper reviews and integrates current and relevant literature

Discussion has limited demonstrated support and substantial arguments and ideas;<br />Paper has limited review and integration of current and relevant literature

Discussion has limited demonstrated support and substantial arguments and ideas;<br />Paper has limited review and integration of current and relevant literature

Discussion has limited demonstrated support and substantial arguments and ideas;<br />Paper has limited review and integration of current and relevant literature

Discussion lacks demonstrated support and substantial arguments and ideas; <br/>Paper lacks review and integration of current and relevant literature

Discussion lacks demonstrated support and substantial arguments and ideas; <br/>Paper lacks review and integration of current and relevant literature

Discussion lacks demonstrated support and substantial arguments and ideas; <br/>Paper lacks review and integration of current and relevant literature

85 / 100

Analysis and crit ical thinking

Succinctly and consistently exhibits higher- order crit ical thinking and analysis<br /><br />Research and Evaluation<br /><br />Synthesis and analysis<br /><br/>Application<br /><br />Comprehension<br /><br />Knowledge

Succinctly and consistently exhibits higher- order crit ical thinking and analysis<br />

(95)

HD(85)

D(80)

D(75)

C(70)

C(65)

P(60)

P(55)

P(50)

N(45)

N(40)

N(35)

CRITERIA 3 (10%)

HD(100)

HD(95)

HD(85)

D(80)

<br />Research and Evaluation<br /><br />Synthesis and analysis<br /><br/>Application<br /><br />Comprehension<br /><br />Knowledge

Succinctly and consistently exhibits higher- order crit ical thinking and analysis<br /><br />Research and Evaluation<br /><br />Synthesis and analysis<br /><br/>Application<br /><br />Comprehension<br /><br />Knowledge

Exhibits strong higher-order crit ical thinking and analysis<br /><br />Synthesis andanalysis<br /><br />Application<br /><br />Comprehension<br /><br />Knowledge

Exhibits strong higher-order crit ical thinking and analysis<br /><br />Synthesis andanalysis<br /><br />Application<br /><br />Comprehension<br /><br />Knowledge

Generally, exhibits limited higher-order crit ical thinking and analysis <br /><br/>Application<br /><br />Comprehension<br /><br />Knowledge

Generally, exhibits limited higher-order crit ical thinking and analysis <br /><br/>Application<br /><br />Comprehension<br /><br />Knowledge

Exhibits simplistic or reductive thinking and analysis <br /><br />Comprehension<br /><br />Knowledge

Exhibits simplistic or reductive thinking and analysis <br /><br />Comprehension<br /><br />Knowledge

Exhibits simplistic or reductive thinking and analysis <br /><br />Comprehension<br /><br />Knowledge

Minimal simplistic or reductive thinking and analysis <br /><br />Knowledge

Minimal simplistic or reductive thinking and analysis <br /><br />Knowledge

Minimal simplistic or reductive thinking and analysis <br /><br />Knowledge

70 / 100

Follows requirements f or structure, presentation\ngrammar and spelling.

Accurately and consistently adheres to essay f ormat writ ing conventions,grammatical conventions with no errors and is a logical / well and succinctly structuredassignment

Accurately and consistently adheres to essay f ormat writ ing conventions,grammatical conventions with no errors and is a logical / well and succinctly structuredassignment

Accurately and consistently adheres to essay f ormat writ ing conventions,grammatical conventions with no errors and is a logical / well and succinctly structuredassignment

Mostly accurate and consistent adherence to essay f ormat writ ing conventions,adheres to grammatical conventions with f ew errors and is a logical and well-

D(75)

C(70)

C(65)

P(60)

P(55)

P(50)

N(45)

N(40)

N(35)

CRITERIA 4 (10%)

HD(100)

HD(95)

HD(85)

D

structured assignment

Mostly accurate and consistent adherence to essay f ormat writ ing conventions,adheres to grammatical conventions with f ew errors and is a logical and well-structured assignment

Partial but close adherence to essay f ormat writ ing conventions, adheres togrammatical conventions, but with f requent errors, mainly a well- structuredassignment, lacking cohesion in places

Partial but close adherence to essay f ormat writ ing conventions, adheres togrammatical conventions, but with f requent errors, mainly a well- structuredassignment, lacking cohesion in places

Minimal adherence to essay f ormat writ ing conventions, minimal adherence togrammatical conventions with multiple errors, a weakly structured assignment,f requently lacking cohesion

Minimal adherence to essay f ormat writ ing conventions, minimal adherence togrammatical conventions with multiple errors, a weakly structured assignment,f requently lacking cohesion

Minimal adherence to essay f ormat writ ing conventions, minimal adherence togrammatical conventions with multiple errors, a weakly structured assignment,f requently lacking cohesion

Litt le attempt to adhere to essay f ormat writ ing conventions, multiple grammaticalerrors with minimal attention to writ ing / spelling conventions that signif icantly distractthe reader f rom the content. A poorly structured assignment, lacking cohesion

Litt le attempt to adhere to essay f ormat writ ing conventions, multiple grammaticalerrors with minimal attention to writ ing / spelling conventions that signif icantly distractthe reader f rom the content. A poorly structured assignment, lacking cohesion

Litt le attempt to adhere to essay f ormat writ ing conventions, multiple grammaticalerrors with minimal attention to writ ing / spelling conventions that signif icantly distractthe reader f rom the content. A poorly structured assignment, lacking cohesion

70 / 100

Follows requirements f or ref erencing (APA 6th Edition) and the application of evidence

Accurately and consistently adheres to APA ref erencing conventions f or the in- textand ref erence list<br /><br />Explicit ly acknowledges all sources used throughout theassignment

Accurately and consistently adheres to APA ref erencing conventions f or the in- textand ref erence list<br /><br />Explicit ly acknowledges all sources used throughout theassignment

Accurately and consistently adheres to APA ref erencing conventions f or the in- textand ref erence list<br /><br />Explicit ly acknowledges all sources used throughout theassignment

Mostly of f ers accurate and consistent APA ref erencing conventions f or the in- text

(80)

D(75)

C(70)

C(65)

P(60)

P(55)

P(50)

N(45)

N(40)

N(35)

and ref erence list<br /><br />Principally acknowledges sources used throughout theassignment

Mostly of f ers accurate and consistent APA ref erencing conventions f or the in- textand ref erence list<br /><br />Principally acknowledges sources used throughout theassignment

A number of inaccurate and inconsistent APA ref erences in the in- text and ref erencelist<br /><br />Mostly acknowledges sources used throughout the assignment

A number of inaccurate and inconsistent APA ref erences in the in- text and ref erencelist<br /><br />Mostly acknowledges sources used throughout the assignment

Multiple inaccurate and inconsistent APA ref erences in the in- text and ref erencelist<br /><br />Minimal acknowledgment of sources used throughout the assignment

Multiple inaccurate and inconsistent APA ref erences in the in- text and ref erencelist<br /><br />Minimal acknowledgment of sources used throughout the assignment

Multiple inaccurate and inconsistent APA ref erences in the in- text and ref erencelist<br /><br />Minimal acknowledgment of sources used throughout the assignment

Did not adhere to the APA ref erencing conventions and/or made catastrophic,multiple and consistent APA errors throughout<br /><br />Litt le or no acknowledgmentof sources used throughout the assignment

Did not adhere to the APA ref erencing conventions and/or made catastrophic,multiple and consistent APA errors throughout<br /><br />Litt le or no acknowledgmentof sources used throughout the assignment

Did not adhere to the APA ref erencing conventions and/or made catastrophic,multiple and consistent APA errors throughout<br /><br />Litt le or no acknowledgmentof sources used throughout the assignment