Ordev C Relationships the Five Love Languages

The The LanguagesLanguages

of of LoveLoveThe The LanguagesLanguages

of of LoveLove

The Five Love Languages The Five Love Languages

1.1. Words of AffirmationWords of Affirmation

2.2. Quality TimeQuality Time

3.3. Receiving GiftsReceiving Gifts

4.4. Acts of ServiceActs of Service

5.5. Physical TouchPhysical Touch

The Five Love Languages The Five Love Languages






Words of AffirmationWords of Affirmation

AffirmationAffirmation To ‘affirm’ something is To ‘affirm’ something is

to to confirmconfirm its truth and its truth and to to strengthenstrengthen it. it.

Affirmation can be shown byAffirmation can be shown by

Words of encouragement/praise: to Words of encouragement/praise: to inspire courage in one’s partner. inspire courage in one’s partner.

Kind words: love is basically kind.Kind words: love is basically kind. Humble words: love makes requests, Humble words: love makes requests,

not demands.not demands. Words of affection: “I Love You”Words of affection: “I Love You”

The Five Languages of The Five Languages of LoveLove






A Central Aspect of Quality time is Togetherness.

It is not proximity …

Togetherness has to do with focused

attention

Dialects in the language of Quality Time

Quality conversationSympathetic dialogue where two

people are sharing their experiences, thoughts,

feelings and desires in a friendly, uninterrupted context


Learning to listen Maintain eye contact

Do not listen and do something else at the same time

Listen for feelings Observe body language

Refuse to interrupt

Quality Activities

Doing things together things she likes to do and the

things he likes to do

One of the byproducts of Quality Activities is thatthey provide a memory bank from which

to draw in the years ahead

These are memories of love specially for theperson whose primary love language is quality time


Learning to talk Self revelation: Paying attention

to your emotions

Quality Activities

Doing things together things she likes to do and the

things he likes to do

Quality Activities

One of the byproducts of Quality Activities is that

they provide a memory bank from which

to draw in the years ahead

Quality Activities

These are memories of love specially for the

person whose primary love language is quality time







GIFTSGIFTS

Visible and tangible symbols of loveVisible and tangible symbols of love By its very nature, a gift is something By its very nature, a gift is something

which is not deserved; it is given which is not deserved; it is given because the giver desires to share because the giver desires to share unconditional love to one’s partnerunconditional love to one’s partner

Another aspect of gift giving is that it Another aspect of gift giving is that it should be done with some measure should be done with some measure of “ceremony”of “ceremony”

If your mate is a If your mate is a giftgift receiverreceiver

1.1. Make a list of gifts that make Make a list of gifts that make him/her excitedhim/her excited

2.2. Select the gift he/she enjoysSelect the gift he/she enjoys

3.3. Select gifts that you feel Select gifts that you feel comfortable purchasing, comfortable purchasing, making, or findingmaking, or finding

4.4. Don’t wait for special Don’t wait for special occasionsoccasions







Acts of ServiceActs of Service Doing things you know your partner Doing things you know your partner

would like you to do. It is a loving would like you to do. It is a loving service. service.

Loving service is not slavery. Loving service is not slavery. Loving service is an internally Loving service is an internally

motivated desire to give one’s energy motivated desire to give one’s energy to others.to others.

Loving service is a gift, not a necessity.Loving service is a gift, not a necessity. Loving service is done freely, not under Loving service is done freely, not under

coercion.coercion.

Learning the language of Learning the language of serviceservice requires that requires that

We do not use such to We do not use such to manipulate the other. manipulate the other. Manipulation is never an Manipulation is never an expression of love.expression of love.

We need to overcome We need to overcome stereotypes of male and stereotypes of male and female roles.female roles.







Physical Touch

A very powerful way of communicating

emotional love

It should be communicated at the

appropriate time, in the appropriate

place and in an appropriate manner

• Sexual intercourse is only one dialect of the language of Physical Touch

• Touching is not limited to one localized area of the body

• Physical touch can make or break a relationship. It can communicate hate or love.

Discovering your Discovering your partner’s primary love partner’s primary love

languagelanguage

Ask questionsAsk questions Make observationsMake observations ExperimentExperiment

Finally, it is important to note Finally, it is important to note that:that:

Your partner needs to receive love Your partner needs to receive love from you in all five love languages.from you in all five love languages.

The primary love language will The primary love language will speak more deeply and will more speak more deeply and will more quickly fill the emotional love tank; quickly fill the emotional love tank; but, it must be complemented by but, it must be complemented by speaking the other four languages speaking the other four languages as well.as well.

Once your partner is receiving a Once your partner is receiving a sufficient amount of love in his/her sufficient amount of love in his/her primary love language, then the primary love language, then the other love languages become even other love languages become even more meaningful.more meaningful.

On the other hand, if your partner’s On the other hand, if your partner’s primary love language is ignored, the primary love language is ignored, the other four are not likely to fill your other four are not likely to fill your partner’s emotional love tank. partner’s emotional love tank.

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Ordev C Relationships the Five Love Languages