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8/7/2019 Of Saints and Sinners
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Of Saints and Sinners
By John McCarrick
One Steve Glendenning
Jefferson High School
110 Mordington Avenue, Charles Town WV, 25414
Thespian Troupe 2774
December 8th
, 2010
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O f S a i n t s a n d S i n n e r s , P a g e 3List of Characters:
Alexander
Caroline
Despair
Jessica
Judgment
Madness
Officer Bornholm
Retribution
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O f S a i n t s a n d S i n n e r s , P a g e 4(The play opens with three distinct scenes in the dark created in any way the director
chooses. The first is ALEXANDER alone under a large industrial bridge [this can be implied
with a flat painted to look like such in the distance].The second is a crime scene with OFFICER
BORNHOLM and JESSICA laying dead on the ground covered by a bloody sheet and
surrounded by crime scene tape polls [From here on referred to as Jessicas House set].The
third is CAROLINEin her and Alexs home[known from here on out as Home set],sitting on a
couch alone with a box of tissues.)
(Lights up on Alexs scene, from here on referred to as the Bridge set)
ALEXANDER: (holding his head in his hands) What have I done God whathave I done
(light on Bornholm immediately)
BORNHOLM: (shouting towards the audience, music starts) I WILL bring you to justice! I
swear to you, you son of a bitch!
(lights up on Caroline immediately, music builds up during lines)
CAROLINE: (crying) Alexander! Where are you! Come home, please
(all lights out immediately, music climax and loudly, abruptly, ends)
ALEXANDER: (over a microphone two seconds after the music ends) What have I done?
(a single light fades onto center stage, focusing on Alex only. He is kneeling over on the ground,
still with his hands on his face)
JUDGEMENT: Murder. You have committed murder.
(JUDGEMENT stands on a pedestal, with a morose stone pair of wings in the background as
well as a light. He stands almost perfectly still, except for hand movements and the like, the
entire play)
ALEXANDER: (snapping his head up and standing quickly) WHOS THERE?
MADNESS: Why, YOU are there!
(lights up on MADNESS, whom leaves his cluttered and messy desk to start slowly/creepily
crawling or stalking towards Alexander and around him.)
DESPAIR: Alone, in the dark.
(lights up on DESPAIR, sitting at a chair and desk with a single hour glass on it. He has a set of
dice that he occasionally plays with. The motions he makes are stiff and skeletal)
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O f S a i n t s a n d S i n n e r s , P a g e 5MADNESS: (Skulking behind Despair in the light, giving Madness the iconic moose-antlers
before popping out from beside him to speak, despair shows no response) With us. (Madness
moves back to his own desk with a dance or skip)
ALEXANDER: (looking at Despair and Madness, then back to Judgment) Where am I?
RETRIBUTION: Silence, listen now.
(As RETRIBUTION is talking above, lights up on Retribution and Alexander turns to face him.
[now with all lights up, this is referred to as The Trial set from here on out]Retribution is sitting
behind his own desk, which is neatly organized with an ink well, quill, and several papers)
DESPAIR: It is all you can do.
JUDGEMENT: Alexander Hanes (Alexander responds to his name immediately and turns his
back to the audience) you are hereby on trial for the murder of Jessica Bornholm. What say you?
ALEXANDER: (turning shamefully back to the audience, moving forward in the light some) I
God I dont know what happened. She was being so cruel, so spiteful, years she hurt me and
Caroline God I just, I snapped! I didnt mean to kill her!
RETRIBUTION: That does not change the fact. (turning his chair or simply in his chair
towards Judgment, as if petitioning) I for one stand that Alexander should face justice at the
hands of the legal enforcement that are currently perusing him as we speak!
MADNESS: (leaning his head on his arm as he is speaking, drumming his fingers on the desk
with the other hand) Oh NATURALLY you would wish that, wouldnt you? (Retribution faces
Madness, Madness has a quick change in attitude to bright and happy, but while speaking thelines slowly change to a twisted violent anger) I say we let him lose! Go wild! Have a party! Kill
a few more whores, no ones going to miss them!
RETRIBUTION: (rebuking Madness) Enough blood has been spilt!
DESPAIR: (rolling his dice before talking, very calmly) Not enough. No, there is only one end
to this. Come Alexander, let us find a nice high bridge
RETRIBUTION: (scoffing) A cowards way out, he deserves to be punished!
MADNESS: (said inquisitively) Or he could be really ballsy and try to take on the entireBornholm line!
RETRIBUTION: (overlapping argument) (standing quickly from his chair and pointing
accusingly at Madness, very dramatically like an upper class stereotype offended) How dare you
say such a thing! Do you have no concept of morality and law, cretin!
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O f S a i n t s a n d S i n n e r s , P a g e 6MADNESS: (overlapping argument) (jumping up on his desk and mimicking Retributions exact
movements while speaking) Dont be so boring! Morality is for the weak, law abiding puppets!
(starts breaking his mocking and plays with an imaginary marionette, giggling)
DESPAIR: (overlapping argument) (hissing whilst standing and loudly tapping his scythe on the
floor) Youre both wrong! His fate is clear, allow him to embrace it with clear mind!
JUDGEMENT: (holding out his hand after the rest have argued, cutting them off) ENOUGH!
(Retribution sits back down and folds his hands, with a scorn on his face. Despair likewise sits
down and taps the hour glass on his desk, then points to Alexander, and continues rolling the
dice. Madness, whom is giggling, finally is aware ofwhats happening and back flips or melts to
the floor and gets in his chair before continuing playing with his imaginary puppet and silently
talking to it under his desk. As Madness is off his desk, Judgment clears his throat and continues)
Alexander, can you recount exactly what happened?
ALEXANDER
: Yes I can, it started. It started (closes his hands over his face, stressed)
JUDGEMENT: (annoyed, but still very calm) We do not have time for this, speak!
ALEXANDER: (dropping his hands and pleading) Please, I dont understand it! Its
shattered. Broken. (calming down to explain) I was drunk, and I think I blacked out somewhere
downtown running away.
RETRIBUTION: Go on.
(lights fade down, lights on Bornholm, whom is sitting at a cluttered and messy desk with a
phone [from here on out known as the Office set].A phone rings with lights)
BORNHOLM: (on the phone, lights up on Caroline and the Home set) Caroline? Its me again,
you have to tell me where he is. He is clearly dangerous, you MUST report him. Caroline I know
youre there! Answer me! (growls while hanging up) Damn it Where is he?
(lights fade down on Bornholm, but remain up on Caroline)
CAROLINE: (ignoring the phone) Hesnot dangerous. I know what he did was wrong, but
God she was ruining him! He had every reason to hate her. I have to find you, Alex. Before
that vulture does. (Carolinestands up to gather her things, anything handy that would make
sense [keys, a purse, shoes, ect] will do)
(lightsfade down on Caroline, blue lights go up on Alex at the Bridge scene)
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O f S a i n t s a n d S i n n e r s , P a g e 7ALEXANDER: (stumbling around, he has blood on his hands and clothes, and has a bottle of
liquor) She deserved it! She had it coming! She was trying to ruin our life! (continues drinking
from the bottle) Ive shit, Ive got to hide! Ive got to hide! (runs off stage)
(blue lights down, lights up on Bornholm and the Office set)
BORNHOLM: (on the same phone) The suspect were looking for has the following
description. [race, hair color, weight, height, and eye color description of actor playing
Alexander optional]
(lights fade down on Bornholm, and back up on at The Trial set)
ALEXANDER: What were we fighting about this time
MADNESS: (no longer under the desk, but leaning on it as if bored with the story) Who cares?
The bitch deserved it, and she isnt the only one. (suddenly growing excited, smacking his lips
like a dog and cocking his head) How about her pappy? (picking up an over-the-top Britishaccent, or alternatively mocking Retributions voice and posture) I would rather relish in the sport
of it, what ho!
RETRIBUTION: Hold your tongue, foul thing!
ALEXANDER: She got Caroline fired, they argued. She called her a slut, called me a useless
drunk. Later, she called us. She threatened to put Caroline in jail for verbal assault. Told me it
would (using a feminine voice, mocking her words in contempt) at least be a step up from the
streets, where youre going to live. (Alex sighs and slumps his shoulders, ashamed) I went to
the bar, had a few drinks, and decided I had to stand up for myself and for Caroline. So I went
to her house
DESPAIR: (sighing deeply, bored) Despair leads only to further despair. (throws the dice once
again)
MADNESS: (wild excitement) Oh I like where this is going!
ALEXANDER: I knocked loudly. She answered, but kept it only partially open
(lights fade down on Alex as he speaks, lights up on Caroline who is traveling through the
streets, the Bridge set)
CAROLINE: ALEX? ALEX? WHERE ARE YOU?
(blue glow lights up on Alex, who is outside the door of Jessicas House set. He knocks loudly on
the door, Jessica opens it partially)
ALEXANDER: (slurring his words) You, you cant fire her! Whatd she do to deserve that!
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O f S a i n t s a n d S i n n e r s , P a g e 8JESSICA: Suits you right, you drunk stalker. Get off my property, or so help me Ill call my
father and have you arrested for harassment! In fact, my father will hear about this! Go! GET
LOST!
ALEX: NO! NO I WONT GO! LET ME IN!
(Blue lights fade, but Jessica screams as the door continues to be banged on loudly, bringing
lights up immediately on Alex on trial)
JUDGEMENT: And then what happened?
ALEXANDER: (shocked at the realization) I I killed her.
MADNESS: (Madness jumps on top of his desk, then poses as a super hero and slightly overlaps
Alexs line) Justice! And he should be free to doll it out! Vigilante of the new world!
RETRIBUTION: (curiously) Wait, Alexander, who was this woman toyou?
ALEXANDER: Jessica was an ex lover of mine. Shes been taking Caroline and I to court
constantly, Im not entirely sure why. She wants me to be in jail orwanted. (a slight chuckle to
himself, shrugging) Knowing herfather, Id die in jail anyways if he didnt shoot me on the spot.
(blue lights up onJessicas Home, with Caroline and Jessica. Jessica stands at the door,
Caroline stands facing them outside the door)
JESSICA: How dare you accuse me!
CAROLINE: I was just promoted! They would only fire me if someone complained or gave
them reason to! Jessica please, we NEED this job! Just call them and tell them that it was a
misunderstanding,please Ill be happy with my old position!
JESSICA: What about Alex? Still havent found a job, or is he too drunk to do that?
CAROLINE: He doesnt drink anymore! Your constant court appointments keep him from
being able to hold down a job long enough! Why do you hate him so much?
JESSICA: I dont have to tell you that! I have my reasons, and I have more than enough reason
to get every penny I can out of you two! Maybe he shouldnt hit a girl so hard when hes drunk!
CAROLINE: We both know he never touched you now stop it!
JESSICA: What, he doesnt hit YOU?
CAROLINE: No, he doesnt! Never has, and he never hit you anyways! Your lies are as hollow
as your heart, I hope you and your father rot in hell!
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O f S a i n t s a n d S i n n e r s , P a g e 9JESSICA: (very angrily yelling) ILL SAVE YOU AND THAT USLESS DRUNK SEATS,
SLUT! (slams the door)
(immediately with the door slam, blue lights go down and lights up on The Trial set)
DESPAIR
: It is the lot of mortals to live as such and die in despair. (clearing throat, he holds upthe hour glass, sets it down, and gestures with his hand to hurry up)
JUDGEMENT: And her father is Gregory Bornholm, am I correct?
ALEXANDER: (bitterly) Yes, her father is the city chief of police. (exploding in anger) He
brought up false charges against me to help her! Hes a crook! Bending the law to protect his
bitch of a daughter! (sedated, calming down) God, hes hunting me down right now I bet. He
probably wants to find me himself just so he could have the pleasure of killing me himself.
RETRIBUTION: (standing, pacing back and forth on a rant) Why, that vile worm! And you!
Youre both vile! All of you disgust me! (turning as if pleading to Judgment) Let us kill thecharlatan (turning and pointing to Alexander) and then turn yourself in!
MADNESS: (playing patty cake with Despair, whom is not responding at all, his concentration
not broken as he looks to Retribution and responds) Finally I like something youve said! Except
for the whole turn yourself in part. (at this point he stops playing patty cake and begins to
inspect his shoes for marks)
DESPAIR: (annoyed with the further debate) Why kill him too? (returning to his typical cold
voice) No, he could never get away with it. (leaning forward, smiling) Why sit and wait for your
death when you can giveyourselfpeace?
MADNESS: (while checking his shoes, he takes one off and ties it onto his head while saying his
line [if unable to tie it onto his head, alternatively wear it like jewelry around his neck]) Peace
no peace. Hahaha! Never peace! Only the warm, loving embrace of madness! (Madness then
begins to loudly hum Hall of the Mountain King[as this is done, optionally fade the song in into
a sound cue] and dance spinning around in circles around of Alexander)
JESSICA: (Jessica enters sprinting into Alexs circle as Madness continues to dance around
him. Alexander falls backward and pulls himself away from her as she talks. She is in full gore)
Look at me Alex! LOOK AT ME! DO YOU SEE WHAT YOU DID TO ME ALEX? DO YOU
LIKE WHAT YOU SEE? DO YOU WANT ME ALEX? DO YOU WANT ME TO TAKE YOUBACK? KISS ME ALEX! MAKE LOVE TO ME!
ALEXANDER: NO! Please! I didnt mean to kill you! Please! (Alexander crawls to the middle
of the light and into a fetal position and covers his face)
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O f S a i n t s a n d S i n n e r s , P a g e 10(both Madness and Jessica laugh wildly, Jessica shows her many wounds off and attempts to
seduce Alex sickeningly before mirroring Madnesss dance and dancing off stage. Madness
continues to dance until he is upstage left of Alex after Alexs next line)
ALEXANDER: (explosively sitting up and shouting[music stops immediately if played]) SHUT
UP! Shut up shut up shut up! (Madness frowns and covers his heart, then has a great big smileand classily walks back to his desk emphasizing his fashionable new shoe hat [or necklace].
Alexander wipes his face) God, please! Let me live to see Caroline one more time. Please
JUDGEMENT: Tell us more about her, Alexander.
(lights fade, lights up on Caroline, still in the Bridge set)
CAROLINE: (leaning on a wall or kneeling on the ground, looking sorrowfully defeated)
Where could he be? Alex if you can hear me somehow, stay hidden! Ill find you, I promise. I
love you, I always will! Ill find you, Ill find you if I have to search every tunnel, bridge, and
abandoned shack in the entire city!
(lights fade down on Caroline, blue lights on Alex and Caroline in the Home set. Theyre sitting
close to each other sweetly)
ALEXANDER: (holding Caroline, and Caroline holding him like a couple) Im so sorry about
this, this is all my fault
CAROLINE: (comforting Alex) No, no it wasnt your fault.
ALEXANDER: I cant help but feel bad Caroline. I love you, and I hate seeing you punished for
it.
CAROLINE: I love you, Alex. You dont have to feel guilty, I chose to stay. Money isnt so
important anyways, besides I still have my job. Well make due. I promise. Another couple
weeks and youll have a job again, dont worry.
(blue lights fade down, lights back up on The Trial set)
JUDGEMENT: So she will help you, should she find you?
ALEXANDER: She hated Jessica too, weve been under her and her fathers thumb for years
now. The constant court cases caused me to lose my job three months ago, and kept me fromgetting another one since. Then she got Caroline fired too somehow, it must have been her!
JUDGEMENT: So, you dont know that she did?
RETRIBUTION: (haughtily, mockingly) What proof do you have that she DID?
ALEXANDER: Honestly I had none.
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O f S a i n t s a n d S i n n e r s , P a g e 11DESPAIR: (chuckling to himself) None was to be had.
ALEXANDER:No! Youre wrong! (facing the audience still he pivots slightly to Despair, who
looks up at him curiously) Maybe no physical evidence (turns back to the audience for a
moment) but I know she was involved! (still speaking, turns facing toward the audience) She
always is!
RETRIBUTION: (continuing the previous haughty and mocking attitude) Why? Are you so
important that she focused her life on making yours miserable? Hahaha! Ridiculous!
ALEXANDER: I dont know. We broke up years ago, then she started taking me to court
over and over again! Supported by her father, we spent a fortune on lawyers. In the last two
years, Caroline and I could barely afford an apartment together. Now with both of us out of the
job If this wasnt stopped, it was only a matter of time before we both really were on the
streets.
MADNESS: (lounging on his desk) The streets arent so bad you know, (jumping down and
rushing under the table) not as bad as the zoo you call a prison! (Holding and shaking the legs of
his desk like bars on a cage, a massive frown to audience, looking for responses, nodding and
smiling pending audience response)
DESPAIR: (leaning back in his chair, comfortably) And there is something more, isnt there
Alexander?
ALEXANDER: Well, yes Shes pregnant, we hope. (Madness slinks up, back towards
Alexander, and pivots himself slowly towards him with a stone pose and expression of frozen
disgusted surprise) We finally started saving up enough money to support a child last year anddecided to, and Caroline just got promoted too! It was going to be what we always wanted!
RETRIBUTION: (very serious and accusing) And THIS is why you murdered Jessica
Bornholm, isnt it?
ALEXANDER: (panicking)No! I didnt mean to! I swear I didnt mean to!
RETRIBUTION: Lies! You knew you didnt have the stones to do it sober, so you drunkend
yourself up first! Tell me, why are you such a coward that you cannoteven stand up for your
own actions!
MADNESS: (breaking his statue form by shaking his head and body wildly for a moment, then
continuing to twitch during his line) Stop being so boring! Always boring! Always angry! Never
any exciting changes! Look at it this way, you got your stupid retribution when he killed her!
(leaning in Alexs direction) ten points! (winking, then returning to facing Retribution directly) I
propose something new! (jumping up on the desk, acting like a cat) How about we. Gut the
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O f S a i n t s a n d S i n n e r s , P a g e 12old bastard hahahaha! Then we can gut another! And another! Then maybe plow Caroline before
you go plow fifty more hahahaha!
ALEXANDER: STOP! DONT talk about her like that!
MADNESS
: (turning around and slapping his buttocks) OOohhh dont you want a piece of that!Ahahahahahha! (jumps down with a twist and sits down, silently posing like a polite little girl)
DESPAIR: (no longer content with his dice, Despair starts to twist his scythe in his hand) If
youre quite finished, may we continue? This trial is a waste of time. Alexander, you dont have
a choice. (Alexander turns to Despair) Dont you see? One way or another, you will die. If you
go to the police, Officer Bornholm will have you put on death row. Then wheres your lovely
fianc left? If you kill Bornholm, you risk death there and then. Even if you do manage to kill
him, or anyone else really, youll be on the run until youre hunted down like an animal. If you
try to escape, or hide, you will eventually die alone. Come, let us finish this ourselves. (Despair
gets up, slowly walking towards Retributions desk. Retribution looks on horrified. Despair holdsup the quill and inkwell as well as some paper from Retributions desk, then walks towards
Alexander and drops the paper in front of him, still holding the ink well and quill) Write a nice
little letter to the ones you love. (Despair plucks the quill from the ink well and hands it to
Alexander, whom takes it and picks up the paper) Let them know where youre going. Its
somewhere very beautiful. You will never fear for them again, you will never have to worry
about false charges of court, never disappoint your darling fianc or children. I promise theyll
still love you, and youll be just at home with me. (he begins running his finger along his scythe
while welcoming Alex to him with hand gesture. As he does this, Madness and Retribution both
stand in shocked defiance)
RETRIBUTION: No! No dont listen to him Alexander! We can work through this!
MADNESS: I TAKE BACK EVERYTHING I SAID ABOUT PLOWING YOUR WOMAN!
MOSTLY! PLEASE, DONT KILL US!
ALEXANDER: (turning back to the audience, after a moment of thought, nodding his head no)
If I kill myself, where would that then leave her? No, no I wont do it! (tosses the quill back to
Despair and crumples up the paper and throws it away)
DESPAIR: (disappointed, Despair sighs and calmly returns the quill and ink well to
Retributions desk and walks to his own desk before replying) The offer stands until youve
realized the error of your ways. (Madness and Retribution both sit down relieved, Despair sits
down and picks up his dice and throws them)
JUDGEMENT: You know your options Alexander, make your choice.
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O f S a i n t s a n d S i n n e r s , P a g e 13(lights fade down on the trial, come up on Bornholm, at the Office set)
BORNHOLM: (on the phone) Yes? Yes? FANTASTIC! You will be promoted as soon as this
case is over, I swear it! (hangs up, stands up triumphantly) Finally, answers! So the little tramp
thought she could go looking for her sweet heart without being noticed? Ha! Hell probably
come running out into the open if she finds him. Perfect (grinning, loudly exclaiming) yes, yesperfect!
(lights fade down on Bornholm and rise on Caroline, still at the Bridge set)
CARONLINE: (speaking to people outside of the light or in the audience, she holds a picture in
her hand of Alexander) Im sorry, have you seen this man? Damn it! Please help me, have you
seen this man? Shit! Please, tell me, have you seen this man? Its my fianc hes missing, please
tell me where he is! God damn it! Alexander where are you? (sound cue of car pulling up, or a
police siren) Oh God now what? Are they following me? (she runs off stage wherever is closest,
Bornholm enters from the opposite direction OR from the audience)
BORNHOLM: Just keep running Caroline! Just keep running. Well find you, and well find the
monster that murdered my little girl!
(lights fade on Bornholm and rise on The Trial set)
(Despair is twisting his scythe and resting his head on his fist, Madness is playing imaginary
chess with himself going back and forth in front of and behind his desk, taking on different
personalities with each player. Retribution is stressing, hands held on his head thinking of
what best to do. Judgment, as always, is like a statue. Alexander is pacing around in his personal
light)
ALEXANDER: Wait a minute, why do I HAVE to do anything any of you say? ([all
simultaneously]Retributions face raises an eyebrow and looks sternly annoyed as he sits slowly
straight into his chair, Madness spazzes out as he hears that and flips the imaginary chess board
before sitting down and listening, Despair picks up a single die and inspects it closely before
placing it down and giving attention to Alex) Why cantI return home, and pretend this never
happened? Why cantCaroline and I run away from this? This terrible city! Somewhere green.
Somewhere nice. I dont care if Id have to live the life of a mountain hermit, anything is better
than here!
JUDGEMENT: You dare defy your own guilty conscience, Alexander? You cannot run away
from us. You know that.
MADNESS: (crawling[contortionist or crab walk preferable] towards Alexander, in the
creepiest voice possible) Dont talk like that, Alex! Were the best of friends! You cant leave
us! We cant leave you! (rolling and shoving his face intoAlexanders, growing suddenly very
violent and angry) WE WILL BE FRIENDS FOR EVER ALEX! FRIENDS FOREVER!
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O f S a i n t s a n d S i n n e r s , P a g e 14RETRIBUTION: (getting up from his desk and slowly, confidently, walking towards Alexander)
Your thoughts are our thoughts, our existence is your imagination. If you run from your
punishment, youll be damned to live in this trial of your heart forever.
DESPAIR: (getting up slowly, picking up the exact same die that he inspected earlier, and stiffly
walking, using his scythe as a walking stick) You cannot escape destiny, and your destiny waspurchased when you ended anothers life. (holding the die over Alexander) You are no more able
to escape than we are from this trial. Make your choice Alexander. Make. Your. Choice. (drops
the die ontoAlexanders lap, and readies his scythe)
ALEXANDER: (getting up, shoving all of them back) I CHOOSE LIFE! I CHOOSE
FREEDOM! I CHOOSE JUSTICE! I CHOOSE CAROLINE, THE BABY, A NEW LIFE!
Leave me alone! Leave me alone figments of the mind! Ive no use for you to haunt my thoughts
any longer! MY WILL IS MY OWN!
(lights up on Caroline outside of the trial, lights remain up on the trial)
CAROLINE: ALEXANDER! (runs to Alexander and embraces him, Judgment, Madness,
Retribution, and Despair slink into the darkness ignored by Caroline and Alexander. The lights
fade down on them as Alexander falls to the ground, Caroline holding him) Oh Alex! Itll be ok,
I promise. I swear it!
BORNHOLM: (appearing from the same side Caroline did with a gun in his hand) ON THE
GROUND! BOTH OF YOU! (pulling out a pair of hand cuffs) Caroline, get over here! You are
now an accessory to murder. (Caroline fights this, but is over powered and placed in hand cuffs.
She is thrown to the ground again) And you, you bastard! (turns around gun first to Alexander)
CAROLINE: NO!
ALEXANDER: (Alex charges towards Bornholm and gets shot in the torso, but not before
tackling Bornholm off the bridge [if possible, push Bornholm off the stage and have him scream
with a loud thud sound effect].He stagers backwards, having been shot, and falls onto Caroline
who worked her way out of the loosely placed handcuffs) Caroline Please, tell me
CAROLINE: Alex? Tell you what? (holding Alex in her arms) Tell you what?
ALEXANDER: Do you love me?
CAROLINE: (kisses Alex) I love you Alex. (a light shines on Judgment alone above where he
has been, watching Alexander) Please dont go, we can get you to a hospital. Please stay awake,
stay awake!
ALEXANDER: (looking up at Judgment, he waits for his response. Judgment nods approvingly,
and waves his hand as the light that came faded back away [optionally, have him say this over a
microphone while the light is fading]) I love you too.
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O f S a i n t s a n d S i n n e r s , P a g e 15(all lights fade on stage, entire set is now a wedding scene)
(costume changes, Alexander is in a clean suit, Caroline into a white flowing bridal dress, both
have their hair combed and make up cleaned off quickly. Judgment is much the same, except
more lively make up blush is added, hes holding open a bible)
JUDGEMENT: Do you, Alexander Hanes, take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife?
ALEXANDER: I do.
JUDGEMENT: And do you, Caroline Peirce, take this man to be your lawfully wedded
husband?
CAROLINE: I do.
JUDGEMENT: (closing his bible and smiling) You may now kiss the bride.
(Caroline and Alexander kiss and leave the stage hand in hand with organ music playing,Judgment follows after they departed from the light. The three guests, Madness, Despair, and
Retribution, get up and slowly walk together down to leave)
MADNESS: You know Ive always loved a happy ending!
DESPAIR: I could hardly imagine.
MADNESS: You could try having a personality once in a while.
RETRIBUTION: You could try sticking to one personality for five minutes.
MADNESS: (overlapping banter) You know I think Ive had just about enough of you two
fibbily wibbily whops! What ho Mr. stereotypes! At least Im likable. (improvise till lights fade
down)
RETRIBUTION: (overlapping banter) At least I have a vocabulary consistent with the English
language, madman! I mean really, fibbily wibbily whops? Mr. stereotype? Why I never!
(improvise till lights fade down)
DESPAIR: (slightly delayed overlapping banter) Please, spare me of an eternity with these two
blundering idiots! (improvise self-monologue responses to the other two till lights fade down)
(curtain call, Alexander and Caroline first. Then Officer Bornholm and Jessica come out.
Lastly, the four figments come out at one time. Group bow)