Summertime. Commute Time. Time Off. Vacation Time. Time Out.

It doesn’t take long when you begin to read St. Benedict’s Rule to

notice how often Benedict talks about time. He sets out specific times for

prayer, for eating, for sleeping and he recognizes that during the year as

seasons change, his monastic's need to change their daily routine as well. Why

would a man who is intent on guiding people to heaven have so much concern

about time?

As human beings we are allotted only so much time and how we use it

can determine what kind of person we are. If we spend our time focused on

only one area of our life – be it work, prayer or leisure – then we distort our-

selves and lose the opportunity to live fully-developed lives.

Benedict wanted his followers to live balanced lives, knowing that this

was their best way to achieve holiness. As Oblates we need to pay attention to

the spirit of Benedict’s Rule, not just the words he sets forth. How do we

balance the varying demands in our lives to remain true to what we pledged

through of our Act of Oblation? We promised to dedicate ourselves to the

service of God and humanity, according to the Gospel and the Rule of Benedict

in so far as our state in life permits. That last phrase is key to understanding the

Benedictine meaning of balance. The daily changing demands on our time

require that we keep always before us the principal behind our oblation. We

are serving God and humanity. It’s not either/or but rather and.

In establishing this year’s schedule for our monthly Oblate meetings, it

seemed important that we return our focus on the Rule – both the words and the

spirit it offers to us as tools for holiness. A number of the Sisters will be pre-

senting on particular aspects of the Rule, which is always a nice addition to the

meetings.

We will also be holding an Education Day – Come Home to the

Monastery -- on October 8. This should be a great opportunity to enjoy a day

at Bristow, spend time with our fellow oblates, and hear presentations on the

Psalms, Contemporary Benedictines, and Lectio Divina/Centering Prayer.

Greetings from Sr. Charlotte and Kathy Frick, Oblate Co-Directors

OBLATES

Summer 2016

St. Benedict Monastery, 9535 Linton Hall Rd, Bristow, VA 20136

Email: oblates@osbva.org Phone: 703-361-0106

Those who

follow the way

of Jesus Christ

must attempt

the balance in

which the

demand for

justice is

balanced by

the need for

mercy for

ourselves and

our neighbor

Door of Mercy opened

for this Year of Mercy,

Vatican City, Rome

FINDING THE NARROW PATH

Deciding to walk away from God did not come easily or quickly. Nor did the

decision to return. These kinds of tumultuous events feel as if they happen impul-

sively, spontaneously. But, if we take the time to look back at patterns, we find the

seeds of the decision sown years before the actual action.

Faith and all which accompanies religion like regular church attendance and a

belief that there is something greater here, someone present, informs our decisions

and choices, even our goals. Just so, its absence widens all boundaries. More and

more is acceptable.

This, at times, brutally honest story of the reasons for Wilder’s walk away

from God, then years later, return, cannot fail to provoke and challenge. Her deci-

sion to reveal intimate and painful details of the life lived during the years she refers

to as ‘lost’ will cause even the most devoutly faithful to take a peek at the shadows

of the selves we hide from the world and from ourselves.

NEW BOOK BY NEVEDA OBLATE Lin Walker

Page 2 OBLATES

Page 3 Summer 2016

OBLATE MEETING SCHEDULE

RETURN TO THE RULE

2016-2017 Bristow

September 10, 2016: The vocabulary of the Rule – Presenter: S. Andrea Westkamp

October 8, 2016: “Come Home to the Monastery” – Education Day

November 12, 2016: Contemplative Dimension of the Rule - Presenter: S. Julia

December 10, 2016: Hospitality – Presenter: S. Cecilia

January 14, 2017: Obedience – Presenter: S. Charlotte Lee

February 4, 2017: The Porter of the Monastery – Presenter: Carol Semon

March 11, 2017: Mercy, Spirituality of the Rule – Presenter: S. Joanna

April 8, 2017: History and Sources of the Rule - Presenter: S. Connie Ruth

May 13, 2017: Oblation Ceremony

Oblates and the Rule – Presenter: Kathy Frick

2016-2017 Richmond

September 17, 2016: The vocabulary of the Rule – Presenter: Sister Kathy Persson

October 8, 2016: “Come Home to the Monastery” – Education Day

November 19, 2016: Contemplative Dimension of the Rule_- Presenter: S. Julia

December 17, 2016: Hospitality – Presenter: S. Cecilia

January 21, 2017: Obedience – Presenter: S. Charlotte Lee

February 18, 2017: The Porter of the Monastery – Presenter: Kathy Frick

March 18, 2017: Spirituality of the Rule – Presenter: S. Joanna

April 8, 2017: Presenter: Annie McEntee

May 13, 2017: Oblation Ceremony

Oblates and the Rule – Presenter: Kathy Frick

2016-2017 Bedford

September 10 History of the Bedford Deanery & Benedictine Metal – Mike & Becky Holderbach,

Obl.SB-The Rule: Chapter 63

October 8 “Come Home to the Monastery” Oblation Education Day, Bristow

Baking supplies for St. Pat is to be brought on this day.

November 12 Rule of Benedict – Kathy Frick, Obl. SB -Rule: Chapter 73

December 10 St. Benedict – John Kowalski, Obl. SB - Rule Chapter 50 & 51

Christmas Gifts for our Sisters in Training will be collected at this meeting.

January 14 Liturgy of Hours – Ruth Bailey, Obl. SB - The Rule: Chapters 8 to 19

February 11 History of Monasticism – Sr. Joanna Burley. SB - The Rule: Chapter 1 & 58

March 11 Obedience – Sr. Charlotte Lee, SB - The Rule: Chapters 5 & 71

April 8 Lectio Divina – Nancy Eck, Obl. SB - Rule: Chapter 20

TBD Retreat for Novices ONLY – Bristow (9:00 am – 4:00 pm)

May 13 Oblate Ceremony (Bristow) 10th Anniversary of the first Oblates from Bedford,

July TBD Annual Summer Retreat

PSALMS FROM OUR OBLATES

Page 4 OBLATES

Psalm by Josephine “Chepi” DiCalogero

O, Lord, stop this hurting pain,

It makes me less than I want to be

My frustration becomes anger and hatred

I no longer am your child, no longer a loving being.

Help me to see his pain and fear

To change my anger into kindness and love. Open me and cleanse my corruption

Help me, Lord, to love again.

Hold me so I may hold him under your pinions. Return us to your loving kindness

For you know all there is and promised to be always with me.

Bless you and guide me each day

To become the person you want me to be.

Peace

Psalm followed by prose thoughts from Gillian Quintana

Lord help me to be the one who gives the Hug

Help me to gracious

Others are in my life for a reason

Help me to love ever those that I find hard to love

Thank you for our lives

Help us to find the path to peace

As I write this note on the Feast Day of St. Benedict, July 11, I reflect in amazement on the fact that one man

could write a rule for others, 600 years ago and that it is still relevant today for so many worldwide.

I have been an Oblate for 10 years Each day I read Joan Chittister’s “Insight for the Ages, The Rule of

Benedict” and ponder on the messages. It is a blessing to attend the monthly Oblate meeting at Bristow.

My discernment began over 20 years ago. Sr. Laurence Bucher and Sr. Eileen Heaps were each Directors of

the Oblates then. Now we have grown in membership and instead of meeting in the living room we meet

downstairs in the Subiaco Room - a fitting place and name. I love the fact that the whole community shares

their faith with us.

When I visited Bury Saint Edmunds in England a few years ago I toured the grounds and ruins around the Ab-

bey of the old Benedictine Monastery. I could feel the presence of the former Benedictines. The flowers and

trees reminded me of Sister Pat Haggerty and her love of nature here at Bristow.

Thank you to Sister Cecilia and Sister Andrea Verchuck who have been staunch supporters of the Oblate pro-

gram from the beginning. I am blessed to work side by side with Sister Ann Marie Lange and Sister Trinidad

Montero as a Pastoral Care Team at All Saints Church in Manassas. Thank you Sister Charlotte and Kathy

Frick, our current Co-directors of the Oblate Program. Thank you to St. Benedict and St. Scholastica for your

vision and insight.

Page 5 Summer 2016

Psalm for Help in a Troubled World

To you oh Lord, we call; Our rock, please hear our humble plea

Left without your tender ear, we too might become lost,

lost as have those who have acted in hate.

Hear the voice of a world in sorrow as we cry to you for help.

We lift hand and voice to ask your Holy Sanctuary

Teach us to speak Peace to our neighbors,

Despite the presence of evil in their hearts.

Requite them according to the evil of their practices.

Guide them from malicious thoughts and deeds with your tender grace.

Those who do evil do not regard your word,

Teach them to examine their hearts

and act more closely in harmony with your word.

Blessed be the Lord. You are the source of Peace for a troubled world.

You can soothe the hearts of those in despair, and heal hearts of evil.

Save your people.

At your hand, may future generations learn to live without acts of violence one toward another.

For you are the One True Shepherd, the One who can bring about

The spirit of Love, Peace, Joy, Justice and Hope to a troubled world.

Amen

Page 6 OBLATES

On April 17th, I was honored to serve as a guest panelist for the forum, “St. Benedict for the

Rest of Us,” at Holy Cross Abbey in Berryville, VA. The discussion centered on various ways that

lay Christians can follow the Rule of Benedict in our daily lives without leaving our family and

careers to enter a Monastery.

The audience seemed curious about my role as an oblate. What is different in my life since

I’ve made my profession? What has remained the same? Here is some of what I shared…

I discovered the Rule and the Oblate Way of Life in 2012, and began attending meetings in

Bristow a year later. Like many who live in the DC-Metro area, I was a “workaholic,” focused on

career and personal achievements, sometimes to the point of near-exhaustion. My concentration in

getting things done often rendered me oblivious to the needs of others around me, to the detriment of

precious relationships.

I was initially attracted to the ROB’s call for balance in life. – There is a time for work, a

time for rest, a time for recreation, a time for prayer. I immediately began making changes to better

structure my day – working weekdays between 9-5, with a breaks for food and prayer, then dedicat-

ing my evenings and weekends to home and family. Learning to pray the Daily Office also helped

me to segment my day, taking time to “check-in” with God at Prime, Terce, Sext None, and Vigils.

Daily prayer became routine for me. I felt the changes in the daylight hours and seasons of the year

more keenly. I began to shed responsibilities and activities that unnecessarily took time away from

family, friends and God. Life slowly became a bit more manageable.

Relationships began to flourish. I felt like I was really starting to listen and respond to the

needs of others. I began looking forward to spending time with people I may have avoided in the

past. For example, I now recognize my son’s girlfriend as a lovely and intelligent young woman, and

enjoy our time and conversations sitting in the bleachers as we watch him play baseball. I’ve begun

to spend more time volunteering with outreach efforts at our local homeless shelter and food pantry.

I concluded my portion of the panel discussion with a quote I’d heard from a Sunday sermon

long ago: “We should not relegate God into a single slice of the ‘pie’ that represents our life. Instead,

God should be the filling that permeates our entire pie.” Since making my oblate profession in May

2015, I have strived each day to make this happen.

St. Benedict for the Rest of Us by Pamela Butler, Obl.SB

My first Oblate Retreat by Deborah Charles

Page 7 Summer 2016

I was full of wonder and anticipation as I traveled with my friends from Saint Andrews to

attend the February 27, 2016 Annual Oblate Retreat. I knew that several of the Oblates from the

Bedford Deanery would be present and I was anxious to hear Brother Benet

Tvedten’s presentation “Being an Ordinary Benedictine.” In addition, I

had never been to a monastery and was looking forward to the visit.

We arrived Friday evening and I received a brief tour of the

monastery and the guest house and met many lovely people, including Sister

Charlotte and Kathy. The Friday Night Prayer was so peaceful and I was

struck by the humility of the community and knew those present, including

me, were truly seeking God. After prayer we had dinner at the monastery

with Sr. Charlotte and members of the community.

Saturday morning I was very excited to find out what the day had in store for me. The

Morning Prayer was so beautiful along with the songs and prayers. My heart was full as I listened

and prayed with the community. I felt the presence of the Holy Spirit and knew this was where I

belonged. This was where I could deepen and renew my spirituality. During the petitions, I asked

for prayers for the health of my niece, Kathryn, and her unborn Down’s syndrome son and felt so

much peace.

Brother Benet did not disappoint me with his presentation. We are studying the Book of

James at St. Andrews and several of the points he made in his presentation made me think of

James, including works and service.

Midday Prayer with the whole community was a peaceful and grace-filled time, as I ex-

pected and lunch was a delightful selection of very tasty foods.

Brother Benet continued his presentation after lunch and as I

reflected on his comments I was examining my conscience and thinking

about the times I was negligent in serving others. His presentation was

thoughtful and enjoyable.

I purchased many books from the book store and a few items

from the gift shop and would like to have purchased more books.

In closing, I must admit my first Oblate Retreat was very

humbling, informative and enjoyable. Spirituality, calmness and

peacefulness was evident. I felt the presence of the Holy Spirit, made

new friends, and am eager to attend the next retreat.

Page 8 OBLATES

A Journey by Fran Cannon Slayton

As many of you know, I was diagnosed with brain cancer on January 17th. Thanks to my dear

Benedictine Sisters and Oblates, I’ve been encouraged and uplifted by prayers, cards, calls, emails, and

visits ever since. There is no way for me to thank you all properly – I’ve discovered that having brain

cancer has a way of shining a spotlight on my many limitations. But from the bottom of my heart (and

brain) I do thank you, and I also thank God for you.

The last six months have not been an easy road for me and my family, but neither have they

been as bad as I would have imagined before going through them. I can honestly say the experience of

brain cancer has been a good one in many, many ways. I’d like to share some of the unexpected

“goodnesses” that have come from this admittedly difficult situation.

Bravery and Grace. Many people have told me I have been very brave as I’ve faced my diag-

nosis and surgery. From the outside, I have to admit that it looks this way. I have been surprisingly –

shockingly – calm and at peace in the face of some very scary facts and events. My sense of humor

was very good (well, as good as it ever is) on the morning of my craniotomy – and even during the sur-

gery itself, when I needed to be awake in order to help the surgeons make sure they were only taking

out my tumor and leaving the rest of my brain intact.

But this wasn’t bravery so much as it was, and continues to be, an amazing experience of God’s

grace. Preparing for my surgery, I discovered what it means to be carried completely. I could not rely

on myself to solve the issues at hand. It became painfully clear that I was not in control of the situation

at all. (Nor have I ever been, I’ve come to realize more clearly.) And while I prayed for my doctors

and surgeons, they were not totally in control of my situation either. They did their part, and I did

mine, and our parts were all important to make up the whole. But exactly how all the pieces came to-

gether on the day of my surgery – and ever since – was in hands other than our own. For me, the grace

was to play my part, to trust others to play their parts, and to surrender it all to “other hands.” While

this may look like bravery from the outside, I can assure you it was not. It was a process of acceptance,

surrender, and constantly striving to stay in the present moment.

The Present Moment. I’ve practiced Centering Prayer for around 15 years now. I am con-

vinced that nothing could have prepared me better for having brain cancer. The very idea of brain can-

cer, along with the uncertain future it brings and the many medical procedures that accompany it, can

be overwhelming. To me, its enormity is akin to the idea of trying to understand global poverty – it’s

so big and traumatic and devastating that it is virtually impossible for one mind truly to comprehend.

But Centering Prayer had taught me that I don’t have to get my mind around the whole thing at once –

in fact, it’s better not to.

Instead, I practiced staying in the present moment. I tried my best not to bite into the future

with all its uncertainties, preferring to stay with the facts as they existed at the moment. I stayed away

from the “what ifs” and hypotheticals and just let the days and moments unfold little by little. I did not

speculate about the type of tumor I had, or all the possible prognoses I could have possibly faced. That

was too much. Plus, I wasn’t going to have to deal with every tumor and prognosis – just the ones they

would turn out to be. If I worried about all the possibilities, I would be overwhelmed (not to mention

expending energy I didn’t have). But if I stayed only “in the moment” I only had to comprehend and

deal with what was there in that moment. And that wasn’t too much to handle.

Page 9 Summer 2016

Twenty Minutes of Tears. I didn’t cry very much before my surgery. Not when I was diag-

nosed. Not even when I discussed it with our daughter, Hannah. I wasn’t suppressing the tears – I just

honestly didn’t feel like crying. Frankly, most of the moments between my diagnosis and my surgery

weren’t all that bad.

But two days before my craniotomy, I visited the hospital for a day-long pre-op appointment. I

met with the doctors, heard the nitty-gritty details of what the surgery would be like, and gave some

blood. All-in-all, not too bad. But as Marshall and I drove away from the hospital, a new understand-

ing of the situation suddenly washed over and saturated me. This brain surgery was my journey, my

fate, my calling. The path was set. No one could walk it for me; no one could save me from it. Al-

though I was surrounded by those who loved me, I would have to be the one to do it.

I can’t adequately explain the loneliness I felt as I began to weep at that moment, like Jesus in

the garden before his death, when his disciples were sleeping and he was completely alone. I felt grief,

apprehension, and a very painful understanding of what was to come. I did not ask God to take my cup

away; I was certain it was mine to drink, and the certainty of it brought terror and grief to my heart.

My husband, Marshall, gave me the great gift of allowing me to cry without interruption for the whole

20-minute car ride home from the hospital. And then, just as mysteriously as my crying began, it

ended. I was done. I was calm. And I did not cry again before my surgery.

Wishes and Hopes. My surgery went very well. It turned out I had a grade II

oliodendroglioma tumor, perhaps the best possible outcome of all the possibilities. Brain cancer is not

generally considered curable, but this type of tumor is usually slow-growing and so my prognosis is

better than it otherwise might have been. There are no guarantees – there never were. I continue to

learn how to live with uncertainty as the doctors keep a close eye on me.

Living with brain cancer – living in the present moment – seems to leave me with fewer con-

scious expectations of the future. I just keep trying to face what I need to face each day, and enjoy my-

self as much as I can along with way. I have a great deal of hope. Not hope in a particular outcome – I

think of that more as wishing “for” something. My hope is more a belief – an assurance “in” some-

thing or some One – that everything will be okay, no matter what happens to me, physically. God’s got

me covered, because that’s just who God is and that’s just what God does. I believe this, perhaps more

than I believe anything else.

But believing this doesn’t mean I don’t get uncomfortable, anxious, or even downright scared

sometimes. I have felt all these things on this journey. But, at least so far, that’s not where I live most

of my life. I live most of my life in an exceedingly good and happy present moment. A moment that

holds great hope in God.

Follow my blog at Francannonslayton.com

Page 10 OBLATES

A Review by Patty Tancyus

After working as a nurse for many years, I was forced to "retire" after having 4 back surgeries. I

worked mainly in pediatrics and geriatrics and found my work very fulfilling. Finding myself at home

without a regular work schedule was, at first, pretty depressing until I discovered the BSV website. I

felt divinely led to the Benedictine way of life and to my oblation in 2013.The Rule of St. Benedict has

changed my way of living and my outlook on life both spiritually and in the way I view my "work" in

the world. St. Benedict calls our work an expression of love. We are called to perform our duties with-

out grumbling, without sadness, and without being overburdened. We are encouraged to go about our

work faithfully, cheerfully and carefully. We are to treat our tools and equipment used in our work with

as much reverence as the sacred vessels used at the altar. I read a story in a book titled "Lone Woman

on the Boat" by Melba Milak. The story as follows reinforces this work practice for me and I would

love to share it. It is called "A Blue-Bristled Broom" by Melba Milak.

A sight from Guatemala that I will not forget is the one of someone sweeping. Sweeping the

floors of those cinderblock huts, like a woman in sassy orange slacks and a sleeveless blouse that I saw

on my way to the marina this morning at 6:30 a.m., using a blue-bristled broom to brush the night's

cobwebs out through her open doorway.

Sweeping the porches in front of the huts, like another woman in a short black skirt and an em-

broidered top, a little further down the road, clearing the dust from the front of her store ,"The Tienda

Rosita."

Like a man dressed in an official cobalt blue Esso shirt, cleaning off the islands where the

pumps stand at the gas station. Like a Mayan man in a straw hat using a green and red broom to sweep

the street around his basket of avocados and display of flowers at the central market in Puerto San

Jose'.

Sweeping the dirt where there is no concrete, like a woman who is fortunate to have a white

stucco house with painted pink trim and a yard with a clothesline-all of it enclosed by a snaky wire

fence-but not fortunate enough to have grass in the yard-raking the dirt out from under a line of

just-washed kids' plaid school uniforms.

At the hotel every morning, the pool man skims away the black hunks of ash that fall in the pool

from the dark cloud of smoke caused by the burning of sugar cane fields. The maids, Luki and Estella,

sweep the tile floors of the bungalow every day and then wash them with a wet rag mop.

After a week, I think I would be so discouraged that I would throw away my broom or my mop

or my pool skimmer and just live in the dirt-which is everywhere-a mixture of volcanic ash and

blowing brown soil and gray, gray poverty.

And yet, these Guatemalan people wash their bright-colored blouses and wash their shirts and

pants and hang them out to dry each morning with a smile at sunrise- Sweeping, sweeping; Sweeping

the dirt off the concrete; Sweeping the dirt off the dirt."

Page 11 Summer 2016

A Walk Through a Suburban Eden by Meg Kermon

Tucked away in the sleepy suburb of San Marino, just removed from the bustling noise and

traffic of Los Angeles, lies an oasis of peace. In March, I visited the Huntington Library and Mu-

seum, which houses extensive manuscript and art collections. The library displays early works and

illuminated manuscripts by Chaucer, Shakespeare, a Gutenberg Bible and a liturgy of the hours, as

well as American treasures penned by Lincoln, London and Audubon. The museum buildings show-

case European and American paintings and sculpture, including works by Gainsborough and Cassatt.

The cluster of buildings founded in 1919 by financier Henry Huntington is a museum-goer’s dream.

But I really went for the gardens.

The botanical gardens sprawl over 120 acres and flow from one themed section to the next.

As a practitioner of Tai Chi, the Japanese and Chinese gardens held a special attraction for me. The

Chinese garden follows the traditional approach of incorporating plants, rock, water and architectural

features into a harmonious sanctuary. A waterfall with rock sculptures pours itself into the serenity of

the pond where bridges cross the water, while rounded doorways welcome visitors into the curved-

roof buildings. The Japanese garden, built into steep slopes, includes a replica Japanese house, a

ceremonial tea house and a moon bridge arching across the pond.

Entering the jungle and subtropical gardens provides welcome shade beneath the canopy of

lush tall trees and surrounded by the large-leafed elephant plants and ferns. I was astonished by the

ombu tree from Argentina, whose gigantic swollen base helps the tree deal with wind, grass fires and

scarcity of water of its native habitat.

The foliage of the Australian and Desert gardens seems more at home in the semi-arid south-

ern California soil. Eucalyptus and acacia trees adorn the Australian garden, along with flowering

plants like bottle brush. The Desert garden, the only one I have ever visited, is home to 10 acres host-

ing over 2000 species, from fat golden barrel cactus to the slender, forklike boojum tree. The flower-

ing cactus plants provide wonderful pops of color in the midst of the sandy desert landscape. In these

gardens there is little shade, it is best to visit early in the day.

The camellia garden was in full bloom when I visited, and the gardens

also feature more traditional plantings such as rose and herb gardens, a conser-

vatory and a children’s garden.

Near the bottom of the gardens, a gully on the grounds has been trans-

formed to a setting for the Lily Ponds. The network of small ponds, shaded by

redwood and bamboo, harbors turtles, bullfrogs, koi and numerous aquatic

plants. The ponds are wrapped by shoreline plants including papyrus and

swamp iris, and are decorated by floating water lilies and lotus. And they are

home to a bronze statue of Saint Francis, cast by Clara Huntington (Henry’s

daughter) in the 1920s, welcoming visitors of any faith to a place of tranquil

beauty. What a joyful surprise that I missed on my first trip here!

Page 12 OBLATES

REFLECTIONS ON BEING AN OBLATE OF SAINT BENEDICT (20 years)

by Sue Riley, Obl.SB

Age related occasions have never weighed heavily on me unless there is a specific number

assigned to it. When thinking about the past 20 years as an oblate I had an epiphany----------------

THIS JOURNEY STARTED A LONG, LONG TIME BEFORE THAT.

It was always the swing. It was a simple wooden swing built by my father when I was a very

little girl. I would sit on the swing and wait for my father to come home from work. And, like clock-

work, every night he would set his lunch box down on the front porch and walk to the side of the

house and push me on the swing. It was a ritual that gave me a feeling of peace, joy and content-

ment. The impact of this small act and our time together was much more far reaching than I could

ever imagine. In the coming years while growing up and experiencing life I would return to the feel-

ings that were embedded in me from that simple act, usually at a time in my life of stress or upheaval.

I might add that my father was the person in my life that saw to my everyday Catholic up-

bringing and he was Methodist. When my parents were married they were not allowed to be married

in the church and had to agree to raise their children Catholic. A point that my father took very seri-

ously. My mother did all the big things like sacraments, choir and religious education but together

they were a force of Catholicism.

And as most of us can relate, life moves on and at quite a fast pace. We get involved with

school, college, work, husbands or wives, children and all that that entails. We haven’t left our spiri-

tuality behind, it just gets a little cloudy. I found that all of these things happened to me, --- nothing

bad, but a feeling that there was something more. Something that I was missing. So, I decided to try

to get back to the things that I still believed in, but again, had gotten a little cloudy.

I came to a retreat here at the Monastery, I believe Sister Louise was the moderator, and

something started to stir inside of me. She actually had us doing a directed meditation and believe it

or not, guess where I was- back on the swing.

Well, life again is always full of surprises. We enrolled our daughter at Linton Hall when it

was the early days of the school being coed and there were still boarders at the school. When the

school had a teacher opening, I ended up teaching art.

Then the powerhouse, that was Sister Joan Ann, came into my life. I truly believe that God

orchestrates the people that we are meant to have in our lives. Those people that will make a differ-

ence. Sister Joan Ann and I were soul mates from the very beginning. We did a lot of things to-

gether at the school. We would be annoyed by the same things, work the Holydays/Holidays sale and

sometimes laugh uncontrollably at the same thing until we were in tears. Like I said a real Benedic-

tine force. Sister Joan Ann had brought up the Oblates to me several times and I just said “I’ll think

about it”. Well, it started again that feeling that I wanted to know more. I will be the first one to

admit that sometimes it seems that I need to be hit in the head with a two by four before I get the

message.

Page 13 Summer 2016

So started a not so speedy process. My husband is in the Knights of Columbus and came to

the monastery for many events and activities. I came with him. Sister Joan Ann was still ever pre-

sent and made me feel like this special place was home. After attending several First Fridays here, I

decided it was time. I CAME TO AND OBLATE MEETING

Our meetings were eye opening for me. As I wasn’t sure of exactly what was expected of

me, I listened very carefully. Waiting for the hidden ins and outs of being an oblate-was there

extreme fasting, self flagellation, hair shirts and giving up so much of what I was use to in life and

doing this as a lay person as well? I really did have a picture in the back of my mind that my hus-

band and children would think I had gone over the edge. As for all of these wild thoughts- noth-

ing could be further from the truth.

I came to find out that this Rule of Benedict was something that I was almost following my

whole life and didn’t know it. The scripture study that goes along with the Rule is the glue that

brings it altogether and would eventually fill that space in me that wanted more.

When I first started there were not many oblates that attended the meetings. Perhaps the first

row of seats in the living room would be filled. I am in awe at how this group of people has grown.

We did the same kind of program that we are doing now. And, for some reason I usually did the

first talk of the year. On a personal note I’m glad that there are so many oblates now to share that

responsibility. I have learned so much from all of you. Each person’s life carries a different mean-

ing and experience, and that is a benefit to us all. When we see the Rule from someone else’s eyes

we can only learn a new and different view of the Rule of Benedict. My years associated with the monastery have been happy and complete. I have come to

learn that the Rule of Benedict certainly isn’t boring. Although it is repeated constantly, its

teachings and what we learn constantly change.

The Rule is simple, it is life that is difficult. How we felt or interpreted a particular part of

the Rule last year may be totally different when we read and contemplate on it this year. The

guidelines don’t change but our lives do. We as oblates have found that we can relate and connect

with a document that is 1500 years old. It is with amazement and respect that we as oblates--

ordinary people of the 21st century, can incorporate this Rule into our daily lives. When this often

chaotic world we live in throws us curves, and we all have them, it is this place that grounds me.

Whether I’m here or just picturing it in my mind.

Now getting back to the swing. I think the memory of

the swing and the feelings that came from it was a precursor to

the monastery and the oblate program. I get the same feeling of

peace, joy and contentment here that I got out of that simple

ritual of my father pushing me on the swing. Perhaps, I have

finally learned that there is a force much greater than I ever

imagined guiding me on this journey of the spirit. I will thank

God every day for bringing me here and getting to know and

learn from all of you.

Page 14 OBLATES

Evil, Enemies, Persecution - A Reflection on Patient Endurance By Natalie Daniels

Evil, enemies and persecution (all individually defined) come dressed up in many disguises. Some-

times we can see it coming a mile away, sometimes it slithers upon us from an unseen direction, and too often

we only recognize it after it has gone. The task in dealing with the “terrible three” (evil, enemies and persecu-

tion) is twofold: (1) our immediate reaction and (2) later on, food for growth thoughts. The discipline of our

faith is being put to the test. Do we respond with our feelings, our hearts or a demonstration of our under-

standing? Misunderstandings and conflicts between humans can and do occur for us all. More often than once

a day, a week, a month or even once a year.

To paraphrase author Michael Casey, we need to ‘prime our conscience’ to exercise its function of

choice we will make in response to any of the ‘terrible three’ situations. We need to operate rationally by

weighing the elements at hand, and avoid being compelled to choose an option solely based on an initial

visceral feeling. That being said, we must in essence reprogram and then ‘prime our conscience’ to ‘let go’ of

existing resentment, override the shock factor and stretch out our short patience. Rebooting ourselves with a

conscience primed to act in this specific purposeful freedom is the kind of freedom about which Jesus taught

and martyrs attempt to implement: revolutionized non-violence and peaceful resistance. When the self-

defined “terrible three” (evil, enemies and persecution) reoccur amidst our more intimate relationships; those

we juggle at home, in our marriages, with family, at work and even on occasion church, our discipline of

belief and use of our improved ‘primed conscience is being put to the test.

‘Priming my conscience’ to respond quietly and with resolve is easy if I have had time to prepare

myself to encounter the evil, the enemy or persecutor. But I fall short when the demon catches me off guard.

It seems that my response comes out of my mouth before my thoughts can get out of my heart! The mass

exodus comes’ au-naturale’ with no frills. Usually, caustic with lighting speed. Casey writes that we do not

seek trouble and we invest reasonable efforts in minimizing its power to harm us, but we cannot escape what is

unavoidable. Not having time to head off the wrong choice of words or flee, Casey says we must consider

moving (quickly) to an inner space and going deeper into our hearts to find a place of refuse and peace.

St. Benedict tells us to make prayer the first step in ANYTHING worthwhile that we attempt and to

persevere and not to weaken in that prayer. The 7th chapter of the Rule discusses the fourth degree/step of

Humility. It educates us on dealing with ‘Behavior Problems’. Many a man has taken his pen to explain how

to ‘deal with difficult people’. Ones we find difficult at home, at work and in church, every day of our lives.

In 17 separate notations (pg 102 – Casey) St. Benedict’s ground rules for handling ‘behavior problems’ is

PATIENCE, fortified with and by HUMILITY!

Patience in ‘hard things’, unfavorable things, undeserved injuries, suffering, examinations by fire,

being led into a trap, being struck on the cheek, being spat at, being forced to walk a mile (w/a cross), in all

these citations St. Benedict recommends Patient Endurance of that negativity and maintenance of our inner

peace. Sometimes easier said than done! “Lord, how do I keep from thinking about how to get even or how I

can make this person go away, for good?? The fourth step of Humility says we are meant to go even further

than the situation by readily accepting the person’s behavior challenge with patience and silent endurance.

Not even thinking of avoiding the issue or giving up. Casey writes that to be a non-violent person, it is

essential to be able to bear injuries done to oneself without the desire for retaliation. His referencing of

Benedicts’ teachings, support that we “must be able to bear equably through today’s rough and tumble

communities in order to find peace within ourselves. This’ historical advice’ has withstood the test of time.

We must be diligent in applying our commitments of obedience, humility and stability of the Rule.

Page 15 Summer 2016

Benedict’s words of discipline and teaching are based purely on Scriptural teachings, which when

applied, can get us through almost anything in this daily life. I submit that this discipline that we follow

(Rule of St Benedict) is what Michael Casey is talking about when he addresses ‘priming our conscience’ so

that we can operate rationally in challenging situations and not be impelled toward a particular option based

on how we feel. Imagine how much ‘priming’ Jesus had to do during his final week of life!

In our daily Oblate prayer we ask for help in becoming people/Oblates of prayer and peace. We ask

for hearts wide enough to embrace all whose lives we touch. We are fortified by the Rule which is based on

the scripture words that say ‘whoever perseveres to the very end will be saved.’ Psalmists remind us to be

steadfast in our hearts and trust in the Lord. Listening with the ear of our heart so that we can accept with

willing freedom and fulfill by the way we live, the directions of our Heavenly Father that come thru the Rule

of Benedict.

Not allowing ourselves to be triggered into reciprocating injuries done to us requires stamina and

patience. We can’t always assess the true character of the person we are dealing with, but we can judge and

self-assess going beyond the suffering/injured feelings we are experiencing and remain faithful to our

Benedictine commitments and goals, because we have courage, determination and humility. Our interior

dispositions determine the moral quality of our behavior. To do no injury, and endure patiently any injury

we may be feeling, gives us the ability to strive to reach this plateau, which is in itself is a gift given only to

those who are chosen.

Patient endurance, Benedict writes, is our principal means of identifying directly and personally

with Christ. Casey says that patient endurance is not denying evil in the world but being willing to absorb

part of it as a means of reducing the totality of evil. Being patient with another when they are rejecting

Christ’s words of’ loving one another’ is a challenge.

Five times in different ways Benedict writes us about endurance and non-retaliation. He recom-

mends that we ‘turn the other cheek, seek to understand and shift the focus from the perceived enemy to

ourselves. Benedict insists that we be serious about our Christian Discipleship. Monastic life at any level

leads to eternal life but only through hard, rough work. People who think that Nuns, Brothers, Priests and

Oblates have an inside track without persecution to God’s rewards need to think again!

When we begin to experience difficulties and engage in spiritual warfare (evil, enemies and persecu-

tion) we double down on prayers. We choose to open up all lines to God and worship even harder. Ah!

Food for the ‘devil’. The harder we struggle it seems the harder our way becomes in multiple situations, we

may think of giving up, quitting or turning from God. But, the Word says persevere! Hard times are often

not the sign of progress being made slowly, but often of opportunities for solid progress to occur. Pray and

persevere! Persevere in prayer!

In the scriptures of Mark and Matthew we are taught that Jesus warned his disciples that even their

rewards at one-hundred fold would come along with persecution. Benedict shares with us the fact that in

order to qualify for the happiness and freedom Jesus promised, we will endure persecutions in our trails

because of our fidelity to grace, to our vows, and to our Monastic traditions.

As every one of us meets our measure of evil, enemies and self-defined persecutions on our individ-

ual journeys, enduring persecution, evil and enemies is something to which we are called by circumstances

but only with the permission of our all-loving Father.

“Lord, help me remember today that nothing is gonna happen that you and I can’t take care of”.

Page 16 OBLATES

The eyes are the windows of the soul - English proverb

By Meg Kermon

Just as eyes may provide a glimpse of the soul, the stained glass windows of the Immaculate

Conception Chapel in the monastery at Bristow illuminate God's house of worship, casting beauty

and light on all who pray there. For centuries, stained glass windows have served to beautify and

educate the congregation through scenes from the Bible and Christian history or inspiring visions of

God.

Above the chancel shines the window showing the back of the medal of St. Benedict. In

widespread use since its formal approval by Pope Benedict XIV in the 18th century, the medal is

used by Catholics and followers of St. Benedict to ward off spiritual and physical danger, especially

those related to evil, temptation, and poison. The latter protection harks back to when a group of

monks tried unsuccessfully to poison Benedict early in his monastic life.

The medal depicts a cross encircled by the word “Pax” (peace) at the top, and the letters V

R S N S M V - S M Q L I V B, in reference to the Latin phrase for "Begone Satan! Never tempt me

with your vanities! What you offer me is evil. Drink the poison yourself!" Pax is the international

motto of the Benedictines.

The central cross includes the inscription C S S M L on the vertical bar, which stands for

“Crux sacra sit mihi lux! (May the Holy Cross be my light)” while the horizontal bar displays N D

S M D “Non draco sit mihi dux! (May the dragon never be my overlord!)”. The cross literally

glows as sunlight passes through the window.

The letters C S P B flanking each quadrant of the cross commemorate the founder of west-

ern monasticism, “Crux Sancti Patris Benedicti (The Cross of Holy Father Benedict)”.

Page 17 Summer 2016

2016 Oblation Ceremony

New Oblates - Patty Droppers, Josephine

DiCalogero and Ann Cimini with Sr. Cecilia New Novices - Steve Tomaziefski,

Lisa Leary and Deborah Charles

Anniversary Oblates:

George Healy

Gillian Quintana

Sandra Winans

Mary Simpson

Sue Riley

Gene Epperly