! No Regrets ! Journal!

! !! ! ! ! Winter 2013 Issue 9

No Regrets is a journal of poetry, proseand images about the twists and turnsin the human condition, the search for love, meaning and community.

Poems in this issue are by:

Clayton MedeirosNeil McKayRobert Lashley! !Clayton Medeiros, editor is a poet and collage artist. Neil McKay (Johnny Trash) Webmaster

Submissions are by invitation of the editor!Copyright January 2013

3

4

! ! !! ! ! Jean-Michel Folon

! ! ! Head full of birds! ! ! Top hat! ! ! Singing quietly ! ! ! Against ! ! ! The red sunset! ! ! Of star filled! ! ! Eyes

! ! ! Clayton Medeiros

5

6

Sleep Cycle

I. Circadian

You fall asleep while I do the dishes. Later I fall asleep while you write a letter. Last night you couldn't bear to sleep without me, So I slept with you until 6 a.m. and went home.

Tonight I sleep alone and you sleep alone. We somehow do that together. You like to sleep late in the morning. I fall asleep early on the couch.

There are times we are both awake, At the same time, in the same room, With the same idea. Later I fall asleep while you read.

II. Friday Night

The moon strolls by your houseWith no one watching.A possum tries to get inOr out of your crawlspaceOn tiptoe so he won't disturb us.You are asleep like a child,Me, snoring like my father.In the morning the paperboy willWake me with his pitcher's arm.You will wait until the coffee is made.On Saturdays I rise for you.

III. Early Morning

Eating miniature doughnuts and drinking coffeeAlone in your kitchen.On the other side of the wall youBegin to stir. The glow fromLast night's laughter still surrounds me.

Neil McKay

7

8

!

!

! Venus

! Luminous iron blue prepares for stars! Constellationsʼ secrets in polaris slow turn! And us with them across curved night! Round and round halted now for Venus! Who peers from the dark horizon! Serenely silent despite Greek tales! As we fall in love with eveningʼs star

! Clayton Medeiros

9

! On Listening to David Foster Wallaceʼs Essays! For Allie Medeiros

! Just because you described it going on,! Understood the whys and wherefores, ! Does not mean you can live with ! Post modern loneliness and complexity;

! Not get overwhelmed by a generationʼs cynicism! Encapsulated among indifferent ironies! About inherently impossible happiness ! Regardless of periodic lyrical moments.

! There would never be simple answers,! Each thoughtʼs essential footnotes ! Required explication sometimes left out,! In full knowledge that no one is ever known.!! September 11th in Bloomington! “I do the only thing Iʼll do all day by explaining! where midtown Manhattan is” so one of the! Parishioners wonʼt worry over a distant relative.

10

You knew the words wouldn't be enough,! Inevitable uncertainties muddled across ! Endless arcane cognoscentiʼs discourse! With intrinsically tricked out philosophy,

! Your heart was taken by Bloomington,! Women of an uncertain age, ! “What these Bloomington ladies are,! It seems to me, is innocent.”

! A condition you fully understood! In all of its impossibility, in these days! Of clever repartee, making fun of faith! So desperately needed after all.

! Clayton Medeiros

11

12

!

! ! Shakespeareʼs Oregon

! ! A descending sea of heads! ! Flows to the stage! ! In Shakespearean wonder! ! Righteousness dissected in! ! The foibles of love war and politics! ! Tragedyʼs inevitable misunderstanding! ! Resolved by deathʼs dominion! ! Brutusʼ wields his single sword! ! Caesarʼs many bloody daggers! ! No one left to lay claim to truth! ! Strewn across linguistic frailty! ! Lexicographerʼs shattered purpose! ! Celebrated in the standing ovation

! ! Clayton Medeiros

13

14

! !

! ! Timeʼs Trap

! ! Time holds us ! ! In memory and expectation! ! The present experience! ! Devolves into history! ! Evolves into the future! ! Forever indeterminate! ! Memoryʼs literary license! ! Expectationʼs false dreams! ! Swirl the passing hours

! ! Clayton Medeiros

15

Funeral Blues For Whitney:( After Auden's In The Memory Of W.B Yeats)

1: On the day you found what we were missingus skinny, hungry, thugged out young boysstopped dead in front of the boom-box.

Runs were froze. Crap Games almost deserted.Hood niggas disfigured by public statuteswere transformed by the sound wavesof you back in the day. On you and your instrument, we young thugs agreedyou were wonderful back in the day.And far from our projectslittle homies dreamed you in evergreen forestsghetto nerds were transfixed by radio playsscattered over a thousand stationsscattered--squared--to a thousand more affectionsimmediately and all at once,immediately, every time we heard you and called ourselvesto be better than we were,Immediately, as we dreamed to besomething grand if not grandioseif only to win your heart.If only then, we would scheme up some shitto unearth the sword from our gravel stonesand win--win you--and live happily in your kingdombut the magic dust ate you alive.

16

! ! II! ! Earth, receive a troubled guest.! ! Whitney Houston is laid to rest.! ! Let this Newark vessel lie! ! emptied of our dreams.!! ! For in the nightmare of the dark! ! all the masks we had of your majesty! ! ate your face, all our refusals! ! to look into your blackness! ! have blinded and scarred our eyes.! ! Have turned to brown ash! ! all our crystal strewn pedestals! ! in a parable of genius and dust.! ! And now you hang in memory over us! ! our lady of chemical and too human sorrows! ! trapped eternally in a crystal cage! ! only free in the shadow of Sirius,! ! only free in fleeting notes and electrons! ! of youth, love and limitless potential! ! before yours turned slow to a curse.

Robert Lashley

17

Chunkybrotherlovepoem

For you, I an unwashed pear.I peel all my masks syntheticand temporarythen offer any or allfor want of comfortdesirable and clean.I spread my sections belowand beneath you,lay bare as an arrayof walls and canvases,lay, in the secondsand minutes you wantas a space for your imagination.Spin me. Spin me. My globes are yours, love.My circumference is a land that centerson your presencethat seasons around your moods and your movementin the times you feel a need.

Robert Lashley

18

19

20

! ! !!

! ! ! Empty Sky

! ! ! The skyʼ s empty ! ! ! Incomplete blue! ! ! In this momentʼs! ! ! Flight against! ! ! Timeʼs flutter

! ! ! Clear noon pales! ! ! To dusky! ! ! Sunset glow! ! ! Harbinger of dreams ! ! ! Song lines performed

! ! ! Among evening star ! ! ! White constellations! ! ! Spiraled birth! ! ! Lights inquiries! ! ! Into darkest night

! ! ! Bent timeʼs! ! ! Momentary birth! ! ! Infinite meandering! ! ! Endlessly strewn! ! ! In nightʼs euphoria

! ! ! Clayton Medeiros

21

22

! ! ! Spring Song ! ! ! For Mary Oliverʼs Autumn

! ! ! Do you imagine how ! ! ! Birds dream now?! ! ! How comfortable it is! ! ! To touch the soft air ! ! ! Without earthʼs furrows. ! ! ! Do you think the trees, ! ! ! With buds breaking free, ! ! ! Look for birds to come,! ! ! Settle in nest and branch? ! ! ! Do you hear the daffodilʼs! ! ! Brief blossoms whisper ! ! ! To the first dew of spring? ! ! ! A smooth pond, green field, ! ! ! A hawk over the meadow, ! ! ! Long golden shadows. ! ! ! Wind wags its many tails,! ! ! Flowers close to rest,! ! ! Waiting for morning.

! ! ! Clayton Medeiros

23

24

Rain

! ! Rain pelts high windows! ! Streaks the sky in rivulets! ! Gray against the light! ! Of a Tuesday afternoon

! ! Rain sweeps the waves! ! Peppers the frothy steel! ! Curling toward the beach! ! ! ! ! Empty but for a single gaze

! ! Rain falls to puddles ! ! Flows across the rocks! ! Surges down the road! ! Grows comfortable

! ! Rain drops suddenly! ! Darken the warm cement! ! Curved around the plaza! ! Shoppers scurry for canopies

! ! Rain sheets over streets! ! In the dusky dark! ! Between places and things ! ! No longer dust covered

! ! Who will watch the rain! ! On this long quiet day! ! With nothing to be done! ! And none required to do it

! ! Clayton Medeiros

25

26

! !

!

! !

! ! Tenets

! ! Does our love have tenets! ! That we carefully hew to! ! Should we climb a mountain ! ! To retrieve them carved in stone! ! Contain them in a romantic ark! ! Loveʼs covenant between us! ! In a temple built in cubits! ! Where our love walks freely! ! Among infinite oil lamps

! ! Clayton Medeiros

27

Chicagoʼs Lake

Chicagoʼs bound shorelineGray water fogged to whatCould have been a horizonBeyond the worldʼs edgeGray white caps cool their heelsBreakwater guardians assurePropriety between lake and city

Late morning spring hope inA baptismal of sun blue hintsLake Michiganʼs big shoulderedSaints and heartland churches White clapboard bell towersOnion skinned orthodoxySend prayers and save souls

Clayton Medeiros

28

Lake Guards

! ! ! By the lake! ! ! Sentinels! ! ! Stand against! ! ! Night blue sky! ! ! Guard our dreams ! ! ! Owls slow glide! ! ! Eyes dark grass! ! ! Cedars reach! ! ! To the stars

! ! ! ! ! ! !! ! ! Clayton Medeiros

29

Steel Blue Curved Sky

A steel blue curved skyNo stars now or everIf the world endsFor my eyes The only ones For this nightTime Place View of thingsNot to comeNever to beA moment lost

A curved steel blue skyTimelessBound to a past DisappearedNo history writtenNo books readNo poems recitedTo earsNo longer availableTo listen The quelled voiceWrings no discord

30

! ! !

! ! !

! ! ! A steel curved blue sky! ! Starless ! ! New moon dark! ! A night ! ! No dreams! ! No dreamer! ! No quest ! ! Ever begun! ! To capture! ! In prose! ! In rhyme! ! In free verse

! ! A small quiet play! ! Nostalgia filled! ! Purposeful in! ! Lost nonchalance! ! Of a moment! ! Only I saw! ! Spread through! ! Sudden ageless ! ! Wanderings of! ! Calm eyes ! ! Closed against ! ! A steel blue curved sky

! ! Clayton Medeiros

31

!

!!

! No Regrets Journal! Web site noregretsjournal.com! claymedeiros@aol.com! issuu.com/claymedeiros/docs! facebook.com/NoRegretsJournal

32