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Stefanut
Main OfficePathway to Joy Ministries 1415 Wiley Street, Hollywood
FL 33020, (954) 556-6191
Romania OfficePathway to Joy Ministries
Str. Stefan cel Mare nr. 88 Oradea, cod 410437, Romania
April 2014
C O n t e n t S
Stefanut
Prayer needs
When I learned of the unique challenges the child Stefanut Varga had, I wondered what type of family would take him in and care enough to have him be a part of their family. It was puzzling to me. He was a child so in need of a loving family. The Petrila family was comprised of nine natural-born children, rang-ing from age four to 16 at the time they took Stefanut. They took not only Stefanut, but also Debora. Debora was their first foster child, Stefanut, their fourth. In be-tween were two other foster children who have since been adopted by other families. But nine children of their own, I thought to myself, and still having the love and heart to add more to their lair? How did this in-terest in other children come about? In their church one Sunday, social workers from Pathway to Joy Min-istries (PTJM) presented the need for foster homes for children without families. Their hearts were taken. Mama and Tata discussed it together with their chil-dren and came to a unanimous decision to act on tak-ing a foster child. Though Stefanut was abandoned at birth at the hospital, he was not taken into the Petrila family until he was four years of age. When Stefanut was born, he had serious health prob-lems and difficulties. At eight months, he was unable to sit up or crawl. At 13 months, he was unable to eat from a spoon and could only have a bottle for feed-ings. He was a child who kept everything inside. He seldom cried. At 13 months in 1999, Stefanut was placed in a foster family who was eager to care for him. It was an older couple, and it worked for a year. Due to their failing health, the couple gave him up, and he was placed in a family who sadly was unable to keep
him longer than one week. They had underestimated the intensity of care required. Stefanut was taken back to the first family because the social workers couldn’t find anyone else to care for him. They did a lot of pleading, and that first couple took him back just for temporary housing. No one wanted to return him to the hospital, which at that time had very horrible con-ditions. Stefanut would likely have been tied to a crib, maybe changed once in 24 hours, and would seldom have been held. This force situation of placement was better than the hospital, though it presented great dif-ficulty for that family.Pathway to Joy social workers, Ina and Gina, spent a lot of time praying for a family for Stefanut, one who would take care of him and give him a loving home. Gina had taken time off for her own family and had just returned to work with PTJM at the time the search for Stefanut’s family was happening. They lo-cated the Petrila family in November of 2002. It took eleven months to find this family. Eleven months for the answer to their many prayers. Stefanut has now lived with the Petrila’s since age four. Twelve years later now, they’ve seen positive changes progressing from outright stubbornness and uncooperative atti-tudes to the development of listening to instructions and the ability to obey instructions. He can now fol-low through on completing simple tasks.Stefanut attends a special school suited to his needs. This year he started to say a few words and make a short sentence or two. Even though it’s not a lot, it’s enough that he is able to say a little regarding what he wants. He can say give me this or that. It’s something
By Irene Byers
Debora and Stefanut Debora, Valeria and Stefanut
Is it your birthday? Or, will you celebrate another occasion? Instead of receiving gifts or flowers you can change the life of a child or a family with your gift. This will be your best gift of love! If you need information, please contact us by e-mail: [email protected]
Monthly E-mail Updates Available PTJM is providing a monthly brief update to anyone inter-ested in receiving the latest news and prayer requests. If you would like to add your name to our “E-mail List”, please write to [email protected] Write: “E-mail Update” on the subject space.
Estate Planning and Living Family MemorialsIt is our desire with humility and respect to become the living testament for your family and friends in their time of grief, offering some comfort as a life-giving partner in ministry to these once abandoned children we serve. Such a decision should only be made in complete confidence, so we invite you to contact us directly for more information of ways to establish a living family memorial. Please write to [email protected]
�Mia, Maria, Adina and Ana, our workers at the Chil-dren’s Hospital in Oradea Romania. Please pray that their efforts to provide comfort, love and care to the abandoned babies will be fruitful. Many times they have to defend the rights of the children before the Hospital administration and personnel as they struggle to pro-vide for their needs.
�Please pray for Cornel, a Romanian living in the Gypsy village of Tinca. He was homeless and the Gypsy church took care of him. Later while attending the church ser-vice he gave his life to the Lord. Now he is the custodi-an of that same church. Imagine a black church in the South having a white custodian in the 60’s. That is the image that reflects what is happening with Cornel in the village of Tinca. God for sure has a sense of humor.
�Pray for Cornel Bucur, as he travels throughout Midwest speaking in different churches trying to raise awareness and resources to fund the ministry projects we have in Romania. Please pray for him as he travels and shares the vision God gave the Bucurs.
�Please pray for Stefanut and the Petrila family. Pray for the other 24 families that are part of our PTJM Foster Care ministry, for their children and for their needs.
�Please pray for our Orphan Summer Camp that is being held this year in the month of June in the Transylvania’s Carpathian Mountains. We are in full swing prepara-tion for this event. We have people who are coming to help from Indiana, Tennessee and the Isle of Man.
Prayer Needs
Thank you for making this ministry possible through your prayers and financial support.
the family collectively has been working on with him. It’s an exciting time for the family to see him learning letters, those in his name, and to see him grasping numbers, such as his age. He can understand many things that are said, but cannot carry on a conversation at this point. They keep working with him and en-couraging him. “When I’m going with him to church,” explained Valeria, “I go to a smaller church for his sake, because I try to help him feel comfortable. When he first came to live here, I had to repeat things many times for him to do them. Each day I had to say the same things over and over and over. I had to keep working with him. It was constant repetition. I did not want him to depend on rewards. After awhile he learned to listen and began to obey. I would not give in to what-ever he wanted until he listened to me. It took many times, again and again.”Stefanut loves jigsaw puzzles and things with small items that fit together in a spe-cial way. He eagerly tackles any puzzle from 100 to 1000 pieces. No sweat. And they are completed in record time. While we visited, his mother had Debora bring a puzzle for Stefanut to put together. Without hesitation, he squatted on the floor and set to work as-sembling the pieces. I had to look twice to see what I was seeing. It can’t be, I thought. He was putting them together one complete horizontal row at a time starting at the top and going all the way down! What! There was no putting the outside border together first and then laboriously trying to find piec-es that fit by shape and by color. No. It was go across the puzzle left to right, one horizontal row at a time. All the way down! I was in awe! He also loves screws and mechanical things, activities where he uses his hands. He made some kind of little machine. He loves to build things.The Petrila family had to teach Stefanut to use the bathroom when he first came to live with them. He had just done his business wherever he happened to be. “It was hard for him because he was like in a jungle of thought,” Valeria detailed. “He was wild and untamed, wandering in all directions. He broke the flowers off my plants. He was out of
control. He didn’t understand anything I told him or anything that was expected of him. Now he understands everything, but it’s still hard for him to explain what he wants to say.”In it all, Stefanut respects his Mama and Tata. When I asked who his mom is, he quickly pointed to Valeria. And he had a happy face as he did so. And his sisters? He pointed with pride to both Debora and Ema. It was obvi-ous to me that he is content in this family.As for Stefanut’s future, Valeria sees that he could work with something mechanical, something he can do with his hands. Regrets for taking him? Valeria said they have none. No one in their family regrets their decision. “With your love for children, Valeria,” I asked, “are you considering adding any more foster children to your home?” She laughed at my question and replied, “Stefanut and his care is like having two or three children because he requires a lot of attention working with him. Special needs children take a lot of patience and time. Everyone helps to take care of him. It’s a family commitment. We all work to-gether with Stefanut. But we feel this is what we need to stick with right now.”The family has no problem in keeping Stefa-nut long-term. They did have an experience with one foster child who became aggressive and belligerent, and there came a point in which they had to let him go. So far this hasn’t happened with Stefanut.“This family,” PTJM’s social worker Gina stated, “seems to be a family prepared by God for the care of Stefanut. The difference with this family compared to the previous ones is that they have never given up on him. They accepted the challenges, and there have been big ones. But they have been willing to work with him from little things to big things. Because of that, they have effected positive behavioral changes.”I couldn’t help but agree that God had pre-pared the Petrila’s and Stefanut for each other.
Editor’s note: This story is an edited version taken from the book “From Heartbreak to Joy” by R. Irene Byers (278 pages). If you are interested to read Stefanut’s full story or other similar God stories please visit our web page: www.pathwaytojoy.org, and order a copy.
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