New Cads Report July 2011v2

8/3/2019 New Cads Report July 2011v2

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CADS Report publishes private, secret, and classified nonsense about the state of the UK from anonymous news sources.

CADS REPORTJuly 2011

NETHERLANDS TO GIVEGREECE A SHIP LOAD OF

OF USELESS EUROS...WE CANNOT AFFORD TOLET GREECE DEFALT UNTIL ISELL MY GREEK VILLA SAYSDUTCH CASINO MANAGERJAN THE MAN DE JAGER.

CADS PHONE HACK ATTACK

Murdoch inspired Phone hack attack on

CADS members reveals nothing as most

members don't know how to use one. Pigeon

post, smoke and tin cans with string preferred

ways to communicate.

PIGEON POST

Issue No: Two http://cads-amsterdam.org/

FORSALE

CORRUPTOS ISLAND

ELGINM

ARBLES

NOT INCLUDED

EUROSNOTEXCEPTED

SWISSFRANCSPREFERRED

non compos mentis

CADS PHONE

HACK ATTACK

OUR DAVE IN SEWER WITHDAILY TORYGRAPH

by Peter Osborne

Sooner or later prime ministers make a fatal mistake from

which there is no ultimate recovery. With Tony Blair it was

the Iraq war and the failure to find weapons of mass

destruction. With John Major it was Black Wednesday and

sterlings eviction from the Exchange Rate Mechanism.

With David Cameron a series of disgusting revelations

concerning his friends and associates from Rupert

Murdochs News International has permanently and

irrevocably damaged his reputation.

DearElgin,

Rememberthosemarblesyou

borrowed when we werekids? Well I've got my

self

intoaspotofbother andI

was wondering if I could

have themback so that I

canflogthemoneBay?

YoursIn-Sincerely,

G.Reece.
http://cads-amsterdam.org/Welcome.htmlhttp://cads-amsterdam.org/Welcome.html


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There i s subs ta nt ia l ev idenc e of

incompetence in the Belastingsdienst.

Loonheffing bills correctly paid go

unrecorded, resulting in the enforcement

mechanism trundling into action against

law-abiding businesses. The situation has

now got so bad that the automatic

telephone answering service at the

Belastingdienst Leiden cuts off many callers

who are ringing to complain. If a call isfinally successful, the invariable response is

that they can do nothing by phone, and

dont have email, so one must write by snail

mail. Being tough and entrepreneurial, the

average Dutch small businessman at this

point gives up trying to help the tax office,

and waits for the court summons so he can

have his day in court. But the tax office

bypasses this part of the system by applying

for a bailiff distraint order directly without

the benefit of a court process. Finally, after

turning away the bailiffs, the business can

apply to the court for a review.

Eventually, the Belastingsdienst drops

the case, but accepts no responsibility and

often doesnt even turn up at court to

explain itself.

END OF EURO IN SIGHT

Prices to fall back to 1/2 price pre-euro

period. This will apply to everything from

house prices to hookers.

DAVID CAMERON KILLS BBC WORLD SERVICE

Rather than cut ridiculous DJ salaries, Dave

Chipping Norton Cameron prefers the

BBC to cut off its most influential listening

group in Europe the Wyndham Set.

Dave the grimreaper Cameron

KILLS BBCWORLD

SERVICE.WINSTON

CHURCHILLROLLS IN HISGRAVE AND

CAUSESJAPANESETSUNAMI.

IN GREECE, THE GOVERNMENT AND THE GOVERNED HAVE AN AGREEMENT: THE GOVERNMENT

CHARGES HIGH TAXES, BUT THE PAYMENT IS VOLUNTARY.

IN THE NETHERLANDS, THE GOVERNMENT CHARGES HIGH TAXES..... THEN AGAIN, AND AGAIN,

AND AGAIN, AND AGAINSTUCK IN AN ENDLESS LOOP IT CANNOT ESCAPE.

Dutch Poultry farmers get 10

more years to clip beaks without

anaesthetic

Poultry farmers do not have to stop clipping birds'

beaks without anaesthetic until 2021, farm minister

Henk Bleker said on Thursday. A ban on clipping beaks without anaestheticwas introduced in 2001 but successive farm ministers

have delayed its introduction. However, farmers will

have to switch to a new method of beak removal

using infra red light which is already used for turkeys,

Bleker said.

The beaks of some 37 million birds are currently

removed every year on Dutch poultry farms to stop

the birds pecking each other.

PARTHENOMICSGREEK Versus DUTCH

TAX SYSTEM

CHICKEN-GATE


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We have an interesting agenda for the

summer:

This month there will not be a speaker;

however, we will be joined by senior

m em b er s o f G N E ( G en o o t s c h a p

Nederland-Engeland). During the lunch we

plan to debate the recent cessation of BBC

World Service in Benelux, and our reaction

to it. If you have views on this subject, or

would like to meet our GNE visitors, please

do make the effort to attend.

We will enjoy the culinary and aesthetic

delights of the Apollo terrace if it is warm

and sunny.

In August, we will up sticks andrelocate once again to the Dutch

International Cricket Ground, where John

Richardson has been kind enough not only

to organize a lunch, but also a cricket clinic

for those who would like to hone their skills.

Im afraid that in my case it would require a

full resuscitation team.

And in September we have the golf

trophy challenge cup, courtesy of Inder

Singh. This wil l be held at the

Haarlemmermeersche GC in Cruquius onthe 16th September at 1230, followed by a

dinner at the club at 1800 for both players

and non-players alike. Please let me know

on [email protected] if you will attend

in either capacity. Enough of the CADS issues, and onto the wider world. By the time you read

this, I expect the dreadful Rebekah Brooks

will have resigned in shame and disgrace

from the cesspit of News International she

has created with Robert Murdoch and his

son. Various police officers, including a

senior one, will have been charged with

corruption, and the practices of the British

press will be in the same sewer as UK

politicians expenses and Iraqs WMDs.

David Cameron will emergetarnished, but still with a shiny Eton coat,

despite the arrest of his chief PR man Andy

Coulson on bribery charges. And will limp

on for another 3 years before losing the next

election.

As the halcyon days of a Dutch

summer get underway, we can thank God

that there are still some diverse, interesting

and fundamentally decent people left in theworld, and that we are meeting for a good

lunch!

TWO TRILLION INSECTS KILLED ON DUTCH

CARS EVERY YEAR

Almost two trillion insects are killed by

being splattered on Dutch cars every year,

new research has found.

HOLLAND SEE OFF KENT IN ROTTERDAMHolland claimed their third win of the 2011

Clydesdale Bank 40 campaign against Kent

on Sunday thanks to a thrilling innings from

captain Peter Borren.

Met PoliceAssistant

CommissionerJohn Yates has

quit aftergrowing

pressure amidthe phone-

hacking scandal

IT IS WITH JOYFUL ANTICIPATION AND SOME TREPIDATION THAT I FACE MY FIRST LUNCHEON AS

CHAIRMAN. PLEASE FORGIVE ME THE INEVITABLE MISTAKES. I WILL MAKE IN THE COMING

MONTHS (NO DOUBT YOU WILL TRAIN ME ALONG THE WAY!).

CHAIRMANS CORNER

PAGE THREE.

SCANDALOUS

OUTRAGIOUS

APPALLING

WillDaveSurvive(ToryLongKnive

sBeingSharpened)?
mailto:[email protected]:[email protected]:[email protected]

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New Cads Report July 2011v2