Negotiation Skills1

2121stst Century HR Century HR ConsultantsConsultants

A workshop onA workshop on

Negotiation Negotiation SkillsSkills

2121stst Century HR Century HR ConsultantsConsultants

Dr. Farooq-e-Azam CheemaDr. Farooq-e-Azam CheemaMSc in Human Resource Management and Development, MSc in Human Resource Management and Development,

University of Manchester, UK.University of Manchester, UK.

PhD in Public Administration, University of Karachi. PhD in Public Administration, University of Karachi.

[email protected]

mailto:[email protected]

I.I. Why Why Negotiation?Negotiation?

Negotiation is needed to resolve intra-person Negotiation is needed to resolve intra-person or inter-person conflicts / disagreements / or inter-person conflicts / disagreements / clash of interests. clash of interests.

Negotiation is something that we do all the Negotiation is something that we do all the time and is not only used for business time and is not only used for business purposes. The aim of negotiation is to explore purposes. The aim of negotiation is to explore the situation, and to find a solution that is the situation, and to find a solution that is acceptable to both the sides. acceptable to both the sides.

Only man negotiates; animals do not; when Only man negotiates; animals do not; when faced with larger predator, they do not ask for faced with larger predator, they do not ask for negotiation or justice rather just run away. negotiation or justice rather just run away.

Negotiation is one of the most difficult Negotiation is one of the most difficult jobs a person can do. It requires not only jobs a person can do. It requires not only good business judgment but also a keen good business judgment but also a keen understanding of human nature. understanding of human nature.

Negotiation

Intra-person Negotiation

Inter-person Negotiation

Unplanned Negotiation

PlannedNegotiation

DistributiveNegotiation

IntegrativeNegotiation

HardNegotiation

SoftNegotiation

PrincipledNegotiation

Hard Negotiation Hard Negotiation Hard negotiation involves the negotiation of Hard negotiation involves the negotiation of

positions, rather than interests. positions, rather than interests. It is highly competitive, seeing victory as the number It is highly competitive, seeing victory as the number

one goal. one goal. Hard bargainers, see the participants as adversaries. Hard bargainers, see the participants as adversaries.

They distrust the other side and play sneaky games They distrust the other side and play sneaky games to try to gain the negotiating advantage. to try to gain the negotiating advantage.

Hard bargainers refuse to make concessions and Hard bargainers refuse to make concessions and demand one-sided gains as the price of an demand one-sided gains as the price of an agreement. agreement.

When confronted with a softer opponent, hard When confronted with a softer opponent, hard bargainers almost always will win. When confronted bargainers almost always will win. When confronted with another hard bargainer, however, it can result with another hard bargainer, however, it can result in no agreement, both losing. in no agreement, both losing.

Soft Negotiation Soft Negotiation Soft negotiation also involves the negotiation of Soft negotiation also involves the negotiation of

positions, rather than interests. However, it positions, rather than interests. However, it treats the participants as friends, seeking treats the participants as friends, seeking agreement at almost any cost, and offering agreement at almost any cost, and offering concessions easily in the interests of preserving concessions easily in the interests of preserving (or creating) a good relationship with the other (or creating) a good relationship with the other side. side.

Soft bargainers trust the other side, and are Soft bargainers trust the other side, and are open and honest about their bottom line. open and honest about their bottom line.

This leaves them vulnerable to hard bargainers This leaves them vulnerable to hard bargainers who act competitively–offering few, if any who act competitively–offering few, if any concessions. concessions.

Principled Negotiation Principled Negotiation Principled negotiation is the interest-Principled negotiation is the interest-

based approach to negotiation.based approach to negotiation. Fundamental principles of principled Fundamental principles of principled

negotiation are: negotiation are: 1.1. it separates the people from the it separates the people from the

problem; problem; 2.2. focuses on interests, not positions; focuses on interests, not positions; 3.3. insists on objective criteria of the insists on objective criteria of the

solution. solution.

II.II. Negotiation StylesNegotiation StylesA

sser

tiv

eU

nass

ert

ive

Uncooperative Cooperative

Avoidance

Win / Lose

Accommodating

Win / Win (Collaborating)

Compromise

Win – Lose StyleWin – Lose Style The win-lose is the most common style of The win-lose is the most common style of

distributive negotiation wherein a person distributive negotiation wherein a person pursues his or her own wishes at the pursues his or her own wishes at the expense of other party.expense of other party.

Under this style negotiation is viewed as a Under this style negotiation is viewed as a game to be won. Losing may be taken as game to be won. Losing may be taken as failure, weakness, and a loss of status.failure, weakness, and a loss of status.

When engaged in this style, the parties When engaged in this style, the parties may use different tactics to win like: may use different tactics to win like: persuasion, argument, power, or even persuasion, argument, power, or even threat.threat.

Usefulness Usefulness A forceful position during negotiation may be A forceful position during negotiation may be

appropriate when the stakes are high and costs appropriate when the stakes are high and costs of indecision and compromise are non-of indecision and compromise are non-affordable.affordable.

It is useful when issues of legality and ethics are It is useful when issues of legality and ethics are at hand. at hand.

Where you do not expect to deal with people Where you do not expect to deal with people ever again, and you do not need their goodwill. ever again, and you do not need their goodwill.

When there is only one prize.When there is only one prize. At management level, this style is helping when At management level, this style is helping when

unpopular but necessary decisions must be unpopular but necessary decisions must be made.made.

Win-lose is also a style to use when the other Win-lose is also a style to use when the other party has a tendency to take advantage of you. party has a tendency to take advantage of you.

Avoiding StyleAvoiding Style Avoiding the conflict in certain situations – need Avoiding the conflict in certain situations – need

of no negotiation at all – is also a negotiation.of no negotiation at all – is also a negotiation. People may physically withdraw by simply People may physically withdraw by simply

leaving the scene of conflict or they can refuse to leaving the scene of conflict or they can refuse to get involved by using silence, or changing the get involved by using silence, or changing the topic of conversation.topic of conversation.

Psychologically, avoiders can also deny the Psychologically, avoiders can also deny the existence of conflict.existence of conflict.

During formal negotiation, avoiding style is During formal negotiation, avoiding style is exercised by paying deaf ear and / or blind eye exercised by paying deaf ear and / or blind eye to the conflicting stimulus. to the conflicting stimulus.

Usefulness Usefulness Useful when:Useful when:

your involvement will only result in negative your involvement will only result in negative outcomes for you;outcomes for you;

issue is insignificant;issue is insignificant; cost of challenge / cost is quite high;cost of challenge / cost is quite high; there is little chance of success;there is little chance of success; relationships are more important to be relationships are more important to be

maintained;maintained; to buy time and / or get other party cool down.to buy time and / or get other party cool down.

Accommodating StyleAccommodating Style Accommodating style of negotiation entails Accommodating style of negotiation entails

giving in to the wishes of the opponent party.giving in to the wishes of the opponent party. Like avoidance, accommodating the other Like avoidance, accommodating the other

party almost in one-sided way, is also a party almost in one-sided way, is also a negotiation.negotiation.

Unlike avoiders, the accommodators enter Unlike avoiders, the accommodators enter into negotiation and give in a way that into negotiation and give in a way that strengthens the relationships.strengthens the relationships.

During negotiation, giving in totally / During negotiation, giving in totally / partially may be part of strategic partially may be part of strategic maneuvering. maneuvering.

Usefulness Usefulness When other issues are more important that need When other issues are more important that need

satisfying others and maintaining cooperation.satisfying others and maintaining cooperation. When social credit is to be built for some latter When social credit is to be built for some latter

issue.issue. To minimize loss when one is already losing.To minimize loss when one is already losing. When relationships are more important than the When relationships are more important than the

interests.interests. Though frequent yielding is not a virtue, a Though frequent yielding is not a virtue, a

yielding to a fellow in ire, a balanced yielding yielding to a fellow in ire, a balanced yielding among spouses, or even the frequent yielding among spouses, or even the frequent yielding obedience of a child to a parent or teacher is a obedience of a child to a parent or teacher is a healthy move.healthy move.

Compromising StyleCompromising Style Compromising, the most common style of Compromising, the most common style of

conflict resolution, entails splitting the conflict resolution, entails splitting the differences and reaching an acceptable middle differences and reaching an acceptable middle ground solution through give-and-take whereby ground solution through give-and-take whereby each party should gain something and may have each party should gain something and may have to lose something.to lose something.

Parties under this style of negotiation, generally Parties under this style of negotiation, generally use techniques like trading, bargaining, use techniques like trading, bargaining, smoothing over differences, and voting etc.smoothing over differences, and voting etc.

Most of the negotiations though start with lose-Most of the negotiations though start with lose-win style, do end up at the compromising style. win style, do end up at the compromising style.

Usefulness Usefulness It is useful:It is useful:

when two parties have relatively equal when two parties have relatively equal power and have mutually exclusive goals;power and have mutually exclusive goals;

when time is not available to solve when time is not available to solve problems that are complex and require a problems that are complex and require a great deal of effort to sort out all the great deal of effort to sort out all the issues;issues;

to allow for a temporary solution until to allow for a temporary solution until more time could be devoted to unravel and more time could be devoted to unravel and analyze the complexities; andanalyze the complexities; and

when competition or collaboration fails to when competition or collaboration fails to lead to a solution. lead to a solution.

Collaborating (Win-Win) Collaborating (Win-Win) StyleStyle

Collaborating is based on a willingness to Collaborating is based on a willingness to accept other party’s needs while accept other party’s needs while asserting your own needs as well. asserting your own needs as well.

It assumes that there is some reasonable It assumes that there is some reasonable chance that a solution can be found to chance that a solution can be found to satisfy both parties in conflict without satisfy both parties in conflict without losing much.losing much.

Such solution, most of the time, is not Such solution, most of the time, is not possible but a collaborator believes that possible but a collaborator believes that it is worth trying to find that.it is worth trying to find that.

Illustrative StoryIllustrative Story Two brothers had an orange. Each of them Two brothers had an orange. Each of them

wanted to have it. wanted to have it. Ultimately they resolved the conflict through Ultimately they resolved the conflict through

splitting the orange into two halves, one half splitting the orange into two halves, one half for the each.for the each.

Elder brother ate the pulp and threw the Elder brother ate the pulp and threw the peeling. peeling.

The younger brother who did not have an The younger brother who did not have an innate liking for the oranges and just wanted innate liking for the oranges and just wanted the peeling as a recipe ingredient, used the the peeling as a recipe ingredient, used the peeling and discarded the pulp. peeling and discarded the pulp.

Your Comments…Your Comments…What negotiation style(s) the two What negotiation style(s) the two brothers adopted to resolve the brothers adopted to resolve the conflict? Offer your comments over conflict? Offer your comments over degree of usefulness of the style(s) degree of usefulness of the style(s) used in this situation.used in this situation.

Case Study 1Case Study 1

III.III. Preparing for Preparing for NegotiationNegotiation Take care, your negotiation goals should be Take care, your negotiation goals should be

insightfully prepared. “If there is no harbour insightfully prepared. “If there is no harbour to seek, every wind is the right wind.”to seek, every wind is the right wind.”

Further realize that the more realistic and Further realize that the more realistic and reasonable are your goals, the more likely reasonable are your goals, the more likely you will reach them. you will reach them.

When setting the goals, do not forget one of When setting the goals, do not forget one of the most fundamental point in negotiation– the most fundamental point in negotiation– “Leave Yourself Room To Negotiate.” “Leave Yourself Room To Negotiate.”

1. Set your negotiation goals1. Set your negotiation goals

Always keep in mind some alternative goals Always keep in mind some alternative goals to your main goals. Your alternative goals to your main goals. Your alternative goals constitute a fallback position--the deal you constitute a fallback position--the deal you are willing to settle for if your original are willing to settle for if your original suggestion s turned down. suggestion s turned down. The beauty of preparing alternative goals in The beauty of preparing alternative goals in advance is that by arming yourself with advance is that by arming yourself with alternatives, you can hear the word “no” alternatives, you can hear the word “no” without losing face. without losing face.

2. 2. Set alternative Set alternative goalsgoals

Before you negotiate, you should also Before you negotiate, you should also consider the options you have if you consider the options you have if you cannot reach an agreement. These cannot reach an agreement. These options make up your BATNA- your best options make up your BATNA- your best alternative to a negotiated agreement. alternative to a negotiated agreement. Developing a BATNA in advance of the Developing a BATNA in advance of the negotiation will keep you from negotiation will keep you from accepting poor terms-- or turning down accepting poor terms-- or turning down terms that you ought to accept.terms that you ought to accept.

3.3.BATNA BATNA (Best Alternative to Negotiated (Best Alternative to Negotiated Agreement)Agreement)

Once you’ve determined what you want, Once you’ve determined what you want, what you’re willing to settle for, and what what you’re willing to settle for, and what you can afford to lose, you have to consider you can afford to lose, you have to consider any and all forces that will work in your any and all forces that will work in your favor. Any factors that bolster your primary favor. Any factors that bolster your primary base are called your base are called your secondary bases.secondary bases. You should keep these forces in mind as you You should keep these forces in mind as you negotiate--they will boost your confidence negotiate--they will boost your confidence and prevent you from setting for an and prevent you from setting for an unsatisfactory deal. unsatisfactory deal.

4. Getting on to Secondary Bases4. Getting on to Secondary Bases

The more hard facts, statistics, and The more hard facts, statistics, and documentation you have, the more difficult it documentation you have, the more difficult it will be for anyone to turn you down. More will be for anyone to turn you down. More complex negotiations will require more complex negotiations will require more elaborate files and documentation. elaborate files and documentation. You don’t want to rely on memory alone You don’t want to rely on memory alone during the heat of the discussion, when you during the heat of the discussion, when you may be under a lot of pressure. Having all may be under a lot of pressure. Having all the information you need on paper will also the information you need on paper will also free up your attention to focus on what the free up your attention to focus on what the other person or people are saying---which is other person or people are saying---which is where your concentration where your concentration shouldshould be. be.

5. Doing Your Homework5. Doing Your Homework

All the files in the world won’t help you if All the files in the world won’t help you if they’re spilling out of your briefcase onto the they’re spilling out of your briefcase onto the floor. You cannot afford to break a deep floor. You cannot afford to break a deep discussion while you fumble for a document discussion while you fumble for a document or search for an important piece of or search for an important piece of information. information. If you aren’t organized, you will appear less If you aren’t organized, you will appear less effective and less competent and you could effective and less competent and you could lose your negotiating momentum. lose your negotiating momentum. All documents relating to each major subject All documents relating to each major subject under negotiation should be separated into under negotiation should be separated into individual folders and each folder with a individual folders and each folder with a large, boldly written title that’s easy to read.large, boldly written title that’s easy to read.

6. Get Organized6. Get Organized

In most of the everyday negotiations, In most of the everyday negotiations, you can successfully and confidently you can successfully and confidently represent yourself. But certain represent yourself. But certain negotiations that carry important negotiations that carry important financial or legal ramifications (such as financial or legal ramifications (such as buying or selling a home or negotiating buying or selling a home or negotiating a labor issued) require professional a labor issued) require professional help.help.

7.7.Who Else Is on Your Side?Who Else Is on Your Side?

Before you can be successful in any Before you can be successful in any negotiation, you must negotiation, you must believebelieve that you that you can be successful. Once you’ve settled can be successful. Once you’ve settled your position, review the issue from all your position, review the issue from all angles until you’re fully convinced of angles until you’re fully convinced of the merits of your case. Your conviction the merits of your case. Your conviction and enthusiasm will be obvious when and enthusiasm will be obvious when you negotiate.you negotiate.

8. Psyche Yourself Up For Negotiation8. Psyche Yourself Up For Negotiation


IV.IV. At the At the TableTable……………… Negotiation StrategiesNegotiation Strategies Communication SkillsCommunication Skills

Negotiation StrategiesNegotiation Strategies Ahmad and Hassan decided to purchase Ahmad and Hassan decided to purchase

an office for their newly started business an office for their newly started business three months ago. Their first choice was three months ago. Their first choice was an office located in a new development, an office located in a new development, and priced Rs. 500, 000 (about Rs. and priced Rs. 500, 000 (about Rs. 25,000 above their limit). Ahmad thought 25,000 above their limit). Ahmad thought they could get the price down through they could get the price down through negotiation with the salesman Mr. negotiation with the salesman Mr. Sheikh around their limit while Hassan Sheikh around their limit while Hassan was less optimistic in that regard.was less optimistic in that regard.

Ahmad conducted some research on the Ahmad conducted some research on the development and learned that several of the development and learned that several of the offices including the one they liked had been offices including the one they liked had been on the market almost a year. Though the house on the market almost a year. Though the house they liked was their first choice, other offices they liked was their first choice, other offices were also quality offices and could be were also quality offices and could be accepted as a second choice. Ahmad met the accepted as a second choice. Ahmad met the other salesman, Mr. Agha and learned that the other salesman, Mr. Agha and learned that the prices of those offices were also within their prices of those offices were also within their limit. With this homework done, he made an limit. With this homework done, he made an appointment with Mr. Sheikh and decided to appointment with Mr. Sheikh and decided to meet him alone.meet him alone.

Ahmad informed the Ahmad informed the salesman he really salesman he really liked the office and liked the office and might be sincerely might be sincerely interested at a lower interested at a lower price such as Rs. price such as Rs. 450,000.450,000.

LOWBALLLOWBALL

He was going for He was going for the lowest possible the lowest possible price.price.

Approach StrategStrategyy

VINEGAR-VINEGAR-HONEYHONEY

ApproachApproach StrategyStrategy

The salesperson The salesperson sounded shocked sounded shocked and said, “That is and said, “That is impossible, we impossible, we would not even would not even consider it”. Ahmad consider it”. Ahmad anticipated that anticipated that response, and asked, response, and asked, “If you would not “If you would not accept Rs. 450,000, accept Rs. 450,000, what will you ask?”what will you ask?”

PINPOINT THE NEED

It had been established that the seller would take less than the asking price but not Rs. 450,000. The task then was to pinpoint how much less than Rs. 450,000?

ApproachApproach StrategyStrategy The salesperson did The salesperson did some figuring before some figuring before he said “Rs. he said “Rs. 490,000”. Ahmad 490,000”. Ahmad was prepared for was prepared for this response who this response who tried another tried another strategy saying, “Mr. strategy saying, “Mr. Agha has recently Agha has recently sold two office of sold two office of similar stature for similar stature for Rs. 470,000, and Rs. 470,000, and several others are several others are available with him. available with him. Why would not you Why would not you do the same for do the same for me?”me?”

A strategy designed to put the other party on the defensive in an effort to win some concessions. Added to the Pinpoint, the Need strategy assists in determining what the seller will actually take.

CHALLENGE

ApproachApproach StrategyStrategy The salesperson The salesperson said, “That house said, “That house went cheaper, went cheaper, anyway perhaps I anyway perhaps I could trim the price could trim the price to Rs. 485,000 but to Rs. 485,000 but you will have to pay you will have to pay 20% cash down and 20% cash down and the rest within one the rest within one week.” Ahmad week.” Ahmad guessed the guessed the salesman has a room salesman has a room to tread downward to tread downward and said, and said,

ApproachApproach StrategyStrategy ““Down payment is Down payment is not the problem but not the problem but I cannot pay the rest I cannot pay the rest before three weeks.” before three weeks.” “It is impossible”, “It is impossible”, said the salesman, said the salesman, “our company rules “our company rules do not permit it”. do not permit it”. Ahmad replied, “But Ahmad replied, “But I cannot pay at least I cannot pay at least this much within this this much within this period of time.”period of time.”

FEINTINGThis strategy gives the impression one thing is desired whereas primary objective is really something else.


Politicians use a variation of this strategy to test receptivity by the public to something they plan to do.This planned action is “leaked” by a “reliable resource” to test acceptability before final action is taken.


““I do not think I I do not think I could make further could make further concession”, said the concession”, said the salesman. “Ok! Let salesman. “Ok! Let me consult my me consult my business partner business partner since final decision since final decision will only be after our will only be after our mutual consensus”, mutual consensus”, said Ahmad and left said Ahmad and left the salesman’s the salesman’s office.office.

LIMITED AUTHORITYLimited authority is an attempt to postpone the decision on a pretext to get approval from a competent authority. Whereas the real aim is to gain time for reconsideration, and / or keeping the opponent under pressure for a possible negotiation breakage.

ApproachApproach StrategyStrategy Next day, Ahmad Next day, Ahmad appeared in the appeared in the salesman’s office salesman’s office again along with again along with Hassan, his business Hassan, his business partner and partner and reiterated his reiterated his yesterday’s position yesterday’s position that they could not that they could not pay Rs. 485,000 at pay Rs. 485,000 at least within one least within one week. “It seems week. “It seems difficult to give any difficult to give any further concession further concession without consulting without consulting the builder”, said the the builder”, said the salesman. salesman.


““I told you not to I told you not to approach this agency, approach this agency, you could never you could never conclude any deal with conclude any deal with them”, growled Hassan them”, growled Hassan and stepped out of the and stepped out of the office. office. ““You are spoiling You are spoiling almost a almost a concluded deal. I offer concluded deal. I offer Rs. Rs. 475,000 though I am 475,000 though I am not surenot suremy partner will agree my partner will agree to it. A slight budge to it. A slight budge from your position can from your position can bring the deal back on bring the deal back on track”, murmured track”, murmured Ahmed to the salesman Ahmed to the salesman in confiding style.in confiding style.

ApproachApproach StrategyStrategy ““By the time you By the time you bring your partner bring your partner back, I call to the back, I call to the builder for his builder for his opinion. I think it is opinion. I think it is possible to reach a possible to reach a deal”, said the deal”, said the salesman while salesman while dialing a telephone dialing a telephone number when number when Ahmad walked out of Ahmad walked out of his office to trace his his office to trace his “estranged” “estranged” business partner.business partner.

GOOD GUY / BAD GUY

The good guy / bad guy is an internationally used strategy. One member of a team takes a hard line approach while other member is friendly and easy to deal with.


When bad guy steps out for a few minutes, the good guy offers the deal that under the circumstances seems too good to refuse. Bad guys usually comprise spouses, lawyers etc.


After few minutes Ahmad After few minutes Ahmad entered the salesman’s entered the salesman’s office along with Hassan. office along with Hassan.

““The builder has not been around,The builder has not been around,but I have availed my own limitbut I have availed my own limitand reduced the price to Rs. and reduced the price to Rs. 482,000 provided you could give 482,000 provided you could give us your offer in writing today with us your offer in writing today with the 20% deposit. the 20% deposit.

ApproachApproach StrategyStrategy Ahmad sensing they Ahmad sensing they were close to their were close to their goal replied, “We goal replied, “We really do like this really do like this office, but it is still office, but it is still more than we want more than we want to pay. Please to pay. Please excuse us while we excuse us while we discuss ways in discuss ways in which we might which we might increase our offer. increase our offer. Would you please Would you please reevaluate your reevaluate your position too?position too?

DEFER

Deferring strategy allows the negotiators time to reevaluate their positions. Deferring a decision to make often proves that patience pays.


Ahmad and Hassan Ahmad and Hassan returned in an hour returned in an hour and offered Rs. and offered Rs. 478,000. 478,000. The salesperson told them,The salesperson told them,

I called the builder while I called the builder while you were away. He gave a you were away. He gave a little, but Rs. 478,000 just little, but Rs. 478,000 just won’t do. won’t do.


However, if you However, if you would be willing to would be willing to split the differences, split the differences, and make it Rs. and make it Rs. 480,000, we can 480,000, we can make a deal, make a deal, providing you sign providing you sign the paper and put the paper and put down your 20% cash down your 20% cash today. today.

SPLIT THE DIFFERENCE

Ahmad and Hassan looked Ahmad and Hassan looked towards each other and towards each other and accepted with pleasure.accepted with pleasure.


Communication SkillsCommunication Skills Oral CommunicationOral Communication Non-verbal CommunicationNon-verbal Communication

Oral CommunicationOral Communication Phrase the words properly; it delivers.Phrase the words properly; it delivers.

Two priests were so addicted to smoking that they desperately needed to puff on cigarettes even when they prayed. Both decided to ask their superior for permission to smoke. The first asked if it was okay to smoke while praying? Permission was denied. The second priest asked if he was allowed to pray while he was smoking. His superior found his dedication admirable and immediately granted his request.

Use simple language instead of complex Use simple language instead of complex terminology. However use frequent terminology. However use frequent jargons when negotiating with your jargons when negotiating with your professional counterpart.professional counterpart.

Be as descriptive as possible. Avoid Be as descriptive as possible. Avoid generalities.generalities.

Listening: a strong Listening: a strong negotiation tool!negotiation tool!

Perhaps the best strategy to adopt while the Perhaps the best strategy to adopt while the other side lets off steam is to listen quietly other side lets off steam is to listen quietly without responding to their attacks.without responding to their attacks.

You often get more through listening by finding You often get more through listening by finding out what the other person wants than you do by out what the other person wants than you do by clever arguments supporting what you need.clever arguments supporting what you need.

Standard techniques of good listening are to Standard techniques of good listening are to pay close attention to what is said, to ask the pay close attention to what is said, to ask the other party to spell out carefully and clearly other party to spell out carefully and clearly exactly what they mean, and to request that exactly what they mean, and to request that ideas be repeated if there is any ambiguity or ideas be repeated if there is any ambiguity or uncertainty. uncertainty.

Non-verbal Communicati

on

VibesSymbolic

How something is said instead of what is said i.e. volume, rate and

rhythm, silent pauses, sighs etc.

Facial expressions, body gestures,

dress etc.

KinesicsParalanguage

Feelings and emotions received

from others through their body actions

Body LanguageBody Language What it could What it could meanmean

Avoiding eye contact Lack of confidence in bargaining position

Trying to bully or intimidate

Making excessive eye contact

Lack of confidence in bargaining position

Fiddling with objects such as hair, pencils, or papersCrossing and uncrossing the legs

Impatient – wants to cut a deal quickly

Not receptive to your bargaining position

Keeping legs and arms crossed

When we do not know others, there body When we do not know others, there body language remains the first source of language remains the first source of building image about them.building image about them.

What people say may be reinforced or What people say may be reinforced or contradicted by the non-verbal cues.contradicted by the non-verbal cues.

When there is no congruence between the When there is no congruence between the verbal and non-verbal communication, verbal and non-verbal communication, reliance is placed on the non-verbal aspect reliance is placed on the non-verbal aspect that creates a credibility gap on part of the that creates a credibility gap on part of the speaker labeled as the “non-verbal liar”. speaker labeled as the “non-verbal liar”.

Be careful, actions speak louder than the words.Be careful, actions speak louder than the words.

Negotiation TipsNegotiation Tips1.1. Do not underestimate your power. Most Do not underestimate your power. Most

people tend to have more power than people tend to have more power than they think. Your base of power rests on they think. Your base of power rests on a foundation of more than just a foundation of more than just competition or financial matters. competition or financial matters. Commitment, knowledge, risk taking, Commitment, knowledge, risk taking, hard work, and negotiation skills are hard work, and negotiation skills are also real sources of power. Making a also real sources of power. Making a systematic analysis of these sources, systematic analysis of these sources, you can understand your strengths. you can understand your strengths.

2.2. Do not assume that the other party Do not assume that the other party knows your weaknesses. Rather knows your weaknesses. Rather assume that they do not. You may assume that they do not. You may be better off than you think. be better off than you think.

that some people with PhD’s quit learning that some people with PhD’s quit learning years ago;years ago;

some people in authority are incompetent; some people in authority are incompetent; a specialist may be excellent in their field a specialist may be excellent in their field

but without skill in other areas; but without skill in other areas; learned people, despite high positions of learned people, despite high positions of

power, sometimes lack the courage to power, sometimes lack the courage to pursue their convictions or have none. pursue their convictions or have none.

3.3. Don’t be intimidated by status. We are Don’t be intimidated by status. We are soso accustomed to showing deference to accustomed to showing deference to titles and titles and positions that we carry our attitudes positions that we carry our attitudes to the to the negotiating table. It is well to negotiating table. It is well to remember that some remember that some experts are superficial;experts are superficial;

4.4. Don’t be intimidated by statistics, Don’t be intimidated by statistics, precedents, principles, or precedents, principles, or regulations. It’s 2007, some regulations. It’s 2007, some decisions are made on the basis of decisions are made on the basis of premises and principles long dead premises and principles long dead or irrelevant. Be skeptical. or irrelevant. Be skeptical. Challenge them. Challenge them.

5.5. Most negotiation will require some Most negotiation will require some concession making. Don’t set your concession making. Don’t set your initial demand near your final initial demand near your final objective. There is sufficient objective. There is sufficient evidence to conclude that it pays to evidence to conclude that it pays to start high. Don’t be shy about start high. Don’t be shy about asking for more. Many times your asking for more. Many times your demands may be too modest, or too demands may be too modest, or too easy to achieve. easy to achieve.

6.6. It is a mistake to assume you know It is a mistake to assume you know what the other party wants. It is far what the other party wants. It is far more prudent to assume you do not more prudent to assume you do not know, and then proceed to discover the know, and then proceed to discover the realities of the situation by patient realities of the situation by patient testing. If you proceed to negotiate a testing. If you proceed to negotiate a deal on the basis of your own untested deal on the basis of your own untested estimates, you are making a serious estimates, you are making a serious mistake. mistake.

First, the other party probably is willing to First, the other party probably is willing to make some additional concessions. make some additional concessions.

Second, if you do accept the first offer, Second, if you do accept the first offer, there is a chance the other party will have there is a chance the other party will have the feeling that their offer was foolish. the feeling that their offer was foolish. They may find ways to spoil the agreement They may find ways to spoil the agreement later. later.

In either case, the negotiator who takes In either case, the negotiator who takes the first offer too fast makes a mistake. the first offer too fast makes a mistake.

7.7.Never accept the first offer—Never accept the first offer—many people do. There are two many people do. There are two good reasons not togood reasons not to::

8.8. Never give a concession without Never give a concession without obtaining one in return. Don’t give obtaining one in return. Don’t give concessions away free or without concessions away free or without serious discussion. A concession serious discussion. A concession granted too easily does not contribute granted too easily does not contribute to the other party’s satisfaction nearly to the other party’s satisfaction nearly as much as one that they struggle to as much as one that they struggle to obtain. obtain.

9.9. Never fear toNever fear to negotiation, no negotiation, no matter how great the differences matter how great the differences are. Fear can create enormous are. Fear can create enormous pressure on you and impact your pressure on you and impact your negotiating success. Remember, negotiating success. Remember, negotiation is not a contest. Don’t negotiation is not a contest. Don’t shy away from negotiating just shy away from negotiating just because you are afraid of making a because you are afraid of making a mistake or doing poorly.mistake or doing poorly.

10.10. Never trust your assumptions. They are Never trust your assumptions. They are likely to be as wrong as right. They are likely to be as wrong as right. They are neither right nor wrong until proven so. neither right nor wrong until proven so. However, they can defeat you before However, they can defeat you before you even start negotiating through you even start negotiating through lowering your expectations. lowering your expectations.

11.11. How much you are prepared, something How much you are prepared, something unforeseen always seems to come up in unforeseen always seems to come up in most negotiations. When it does—a time-most negotiations. When it does—a time-out is called for. It might just be a caucus out is called for. It might just be a caucus with yourself (i.e. Please excuse me I with yourself (i.e. Please excuse me I need to use the restroom), or a meeting need to use the restroom), or a meeting among your own people to discuss the among your own people to discuss the new issue. Diplomatic negotiations are new issue. Diplomatic negotiations are usually 10 percent conference and 90 usually 10 percent conference and 90 percent time-out whereas most business percent time-out whereas most business deals reverse this time relationship. deals reverse this time relationship.

It helps reduce the other person’s It helps reduce the other person’s aspiration level;aspiration level;

It gives you a chance to test the It gives you a chance to test the strength of the other person and their strength of the other person and their willingness to stand firm;willingness to stand firm;

It also helps you gather valuable It also helps you gather valuable information about the other person’s information about the other person’s position and feelings.position and feelings.

12.12. The case for high demands but slow and reluctantly The case for high demands but slow and reluctantly given concessions is a strong one.given concessions is a strong one.

13.13. Our emotions get in the way of effective Our emotions get in the way of effective negotiations regularly. Nothing kills negotiations regularly. Nothing kills creativity quicker than anger, pride, creativity quicker than anger, pride, embarrassment, envy, greed, or other embarrassment, envy, greed, or other strong negative emotion. Anger is often an strong negative emotion. Anger is often an expression of fear, or lack of confidence in expression of fear, or lack of confidence in our ability to get what we think we want. our ability to get what we think we want. If we can improve our ability to manage If we can improve our ability to manage our emotions and respond without getting our emotions and respond without getting defensive, we have gone a long way toward defensive, we have gone a long way toward creative negotiation. creative negotiation.

Common mistakes to be Common mistakes to be avoidedavoided

1.1. Inadequate PreparationInadequate Preparation2.2. Ignoring the give/get principleIgnoring the give/get principle3.3. Use of intimidating behavior.Use of intimidating behavior.4.4. Impatience.Impatience.5.5. Loss of temper.Loss of temper.6.6. Talking too much, listening too little, and Talking too much, listening too little, and

remaining indifferent to body language. remaining indifferent to body language. 7.7. Arguing instead of influencing.Arguing instead of influencing.8.8. Ignoring conflict.Ignoring conflict.

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Negotiation Skills1