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NAUGHTY

Naughty - · PDF file4. SEXUAL INNUENDO MONTAGE A BOY and GIRL rip wrapping off their gifts. A BOY and GIRL suck and lick huge candy canes. A BOY and GIRL jump up

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Page 1: Naughty -  · PDF file4. SEXUAL INNUENDO MONTAGE A BOY and GIRL rip wrapping off their gifts. A BOY and GIRL suck and lick huge candy canes. A BOY and GIRL jump up

NAUGHTY

Page 2: Naughty -  · PDF file4. SEXUAL INNUENDO MONTAGE A BOY and GIRL rip wrapping off their gifts. A BOY and GIRL suck and lick huge candy canes. A BOY and GIRL jump up

FADE IN:

INT. LIVING ROOM - NIGHT

The room is meticulously decorated for the holidays. Multi-colored lights twinkle on the Christmas tree in the corner. A plate of cut-out cookies and a tall glass of egg nog siton a table next to a large cushy chair.

"Dance of the Sugarplum Fairies" plays as --

TWO BLACK BOOTS tiptoe across the room to the Christmas tree. A red velvet sack drops down to the floor.

SANTA CLAUS, white beard, red suit, a jolly old elf, bendsdown, opens the sack, pulls out a small box decorated withbright paper, ribbons, and bows.

Santa places it under the tree next to a sleeping kitten. The tag on the gift reads: To Candy, From Santa.

Santa stands, nods, then tiptoes towards the door.

CANDY (O.S.)Where are you going, Santa?

Santa stops, winces.

SANTAGo back to bed, little girl.

CANDY (O.S.)I will...if you tuck me in.

Confusion sets in. Santa turns to see --

CANDY, 20s, tall, voluptuous, beautiful, stands in thedoorway, strikes a seductive pose in a transparent, rednightie.

Santa swallows hard.

SANTAUh, I should be going.

CANDYBut, you just... came.

SANTAReally, I have to be somewhere else. Anywhere else.

Candy unties the top strings of her nightie.

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2.

SANTA (CONT'D)I guess a few more minutes won'tmatter. I could skip Cleveland.

Candy saunters to the chair.

CANDYWhy don't you come sit down. I'lltell you what I want for Christmas.

SANTAThat's okay. I have a pretty goodidea what you want.

CANDYPlease, Santa?

Candy leans over, pats the chair cushion. Santa drops hissack, meanders over to the chair, sits. Candy sits on hislap, places her arms around his neck.

SANTAUh, okay, what do you want forChristmas, little girl?

CANDYI have a confession to make. MyChristmas wish is a little naughty.

SANTAReally? What a surprise.

Candy leans in, whispers in Santa's ear. His eyes widen.

SANTA (CONT'D)Whoa Vixen!

Santa bolts up out of the chair, Candy falls to the floor.

CANDYHey!

SANTAI'm sorry, you're a sweet girl. Maybe a tad deranged, but very sweet. I really have to go. I'm married.

CANDYWhat do you mean you have to go? You just got here. And so what ifyou're married. People cheat allthe time. What world do you livein?

Santa stares off, deep in thought.

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3.

INT. SANTA'S BEDROOM - NIGHT - FLASHBACK

MRS. CLAUS, (50), granny glasses, frilly cap, lies in bed. PUDDIN' McSPRINKLES, (25), elf, sits on top of her, panting.

PUDDIN' MCSPRINKLESWhat if Mr. C finds out?

MRS. CLAUSDon't worry, Puddin'. He won't behome for another -- Kris!

Puddin' McSprinkles looks up at the mirror above the bed. Santa stands across the room, his hands on his hips, pissed.

EXT. SANTA'S CASTLE - NIGHT - FLASHBACK

The front door opens. Santa carries Puddin' McSprinklesoutside, tosses him one hundred yards into a mound of snow.

END FLASHBACK

INT. LIVING ROOM - CONTINUOUS

Santa looks down at Candy, offers his hand. She smiles,takes Santa's hand, stands. Santa sits on the chair, guidesCandy back onto his lap.

SANTANow, about that Christmas wish.

Candy smiles, reaches to the table beside them, takes a twigof mistletoe, holds it above his head.

Candy kisses Santa's cheek, slinks down to the floor.

Santa produces a metal flask from his coat, twists off thecap, empties it into the glass on the table.

CANDY (O.S.)Well, well. What do we have here?

Santa picks up the glass, drinks it down.

CANDY (O.S.) (CONT'D)This is one Christmas package that'sgonna get opened a little early.

ZIIIIP.

Santa chokes, spits eggnog across the room. He places theglass back, slumps in the chair. His eyes widen.

"Here Comes Santa Claus" plays over --

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4.

SEXUAL INNUENDO MONTAGE

A BOY and GIRL rip wrapping off their gifts.

A BOY and GIRL suck and lick huge candy canes.

A BOY and GIRL jump up and down on pogo sticks.

A GIRL blows bubbles.

A BOY plays with a toy train set. The engine and cars entera toy tunnel.

A BOY and GIRL sleep on the sofa in their pajamas. OpenedChristmas packages lie all over the room.

END SEXUAL INNUENDO MONTAGE

INT. BEDROOM - LATER

Santa and Candy lie naked in bed under the sheets. Santasmokes his pipe, his hair sticks out in all directions. Candy snuggles with him, wears his red cap.

CANDYThat was amazing. It's been myfantasy since I was a little girl.

Santa blows a smoke ring.

SANTAI'm glad you waited to tell me.

INT. LIVING ROOM - LATER

Santa, dressed in red suit, and Candy, dressed in a red robe,stand at the front door.

SANTAI really must be going, Candy. Ihave a lot more stops to make.

CANDYWow. You don't ever break character,do you?

SANTAHave a Merry Christmas.

Candy kisses his cheek.

CANDYThank you.

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5.

Santa picks up his sack, opens the door. Candy hands him anenvelope.

SANTAWhat's this?

CANDYYour tip. You earned it.

Santa places the envelope back in her hand.

SANTAJust doing my job.

CANDYMaybe we can do this again some time. You know, I kinda have a thing forthe Easter Bunny.

SANTAI could probably arrange that. MerryChristmas.

CANDYMerry Christmas.

Santa leaves. Candy closes the door.

KNOCK KNOCK.

Candy opens the door. TONY, (30), gigolo, stands in hall,wears a slinky red coat, fake beard around his neck.

TONYHo, ho, ho. I hear somebody's beennaughty.

Candy's eyes widen.

FADE OUT

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6.