Music Monster Mini Adventures Episode 11: They're Society's Problem

8/14/2019 Music Monster Mini Adventures Episode 11: They're Society's Problem

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Outside the Tanaka household, everything was seemingly dead; the trees were bare of their

leaves and the clouds had the tint of whitish-grey. Not everything was dreary, though. A flock of

European starlings sang their awkward melodies, which sounded like out-of-tune bells. The wind blew,

but the birds kept singing in their naked tree.

What was going on inside the Tanaka household was a different story. It had been a week since

Mabel the skipper had sacrificed herself to save Taro. In her egg stage, she was just as seemingly dead

as the trees outside. The only difference was that there were no birds to brighten the situation.

After Taro came home from the Rhythm and Melody World that day, he confessed to his parents

that he had been doing drugs. Since that fateful day, Taro spent the majority of his time in his room

sulking. He sat on his bed and starred at Mabels egg, acknowledging the fact that this was entirely his

fault.

Why do I make such stupid decisions? he asked himself in the

barely lit room, Why? He asked his question in hopes that the egg would

speak to him somehow, but it sat there silently. Those other children,

they still have their monsters to train and love, but I have to start over. He

felt like his body was surrounded by an aura of darkness, one that gave him

depression so mentally crippling that he could barely move.

Haruko and Kano were downstairs having some green tea. Harukowas baffled and saddened by Taros unexpected direction in life.

Who knew our son would succumb to this diabolical habit? asked

Haruko, I thought we raised him well. What have we done wrong? Why is

it that I was able to raise my baby brother all by myself when I was a

teenager, but Im unable to adequately raise my own children now?

Honey,assured Kano, Stop blaming yourself. Its notyour fault.

Youre an excellent mother. It is Taros friends that are to blame. Hes just been hanging out with the

wrong people. At this time, Taros parents didnt know how to make things better. Their son wasnt

doing drugs anymore, but his new habit of sitting in his room all day wasnt any better.

At the household of Harukos brother Kiyoshi, sister-in-law Amy was spending some quality timewith her daughter Ayami. They were playing with one of those play ovens that helped little ones create

little delicacies. When one of the miniature cakes came out of the oven without any burns or unbaked

parts, Amy and Ayami certainly knew that the bonding experience was there.

May I taste some of that cake? asked Ayamis mother. Ayami may have been four years old, but

she was mature enough to share her creations.

Sure, she said. She broke off a modest piece and gave it to her mother. Amy tasted the cake

and found nothing particularly wrong with it; she was quite satisfied.

Mmm, she said, Its nice and moist.


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Thats what she said.

I beg your pardon? Ayami, to the horror of her parents, was also mature enough to repeat

innuendos, as sweet and innocent as she was.

Ayami reached for the can of frosting to complete the cake, but noticed that it had disappeared.

Mommy, wheres the frosting? she asked.

I dont know, said Amy. She heard sounds of consumption coming from the kitchen

consumption of food that wasnt necessarily solid. She got up and peeked into the kitchen to see who it

was. Indeed, it was little Kiyoshi Junior, who had discovered the irresistible taste of confetti frosting. By

now, he had eaten the entire small canister of the stuff and it was clearly visible on his face and hands.

Junior! gasped Amy, Shame on you! Junior was startled at the tone of his mothers voice. His

young mind couldnt fathom the thought of this act being wrong. Give Mommy back the frosting now!

No! he replied. Amy was startled that her own son talked back to her using the one word that

all two-year-olds loved; then again, she shouldnt have been that surprised, either.

Honey, Mommy would really like that carton of

No! As you may have guessed, by now Amy was becoming irate. Well, you guessed right.

Alright, mister, she said, Youre going to your room! This was the first time that Amy truly

raised her voice towards her youngest son. Frightened, Junior tried trotting away but was caught by

Amys hands and picked up. He struggled and continued to move his legs with no avail.

Nooooo! he screamed. Amy carried him all the way upstairs like this and she didnt stop for

anything, no matter how much he screamed and squirmed.

Amy put Junior in his room and shut the door behind her as quickly as possible. Junior was a littleless than pleased, so he banged on the door and screamed like a Banshee, wishing that he was tall

enough to reach the knob. Amy knew that she had to do this, yet she felt horrible. She needed to

confine in somebody.

Meanwhile, at the DMV, Cathy was in the passengers seat of a hover car with a young man who

was taking his drivers test. She had her clipboard ready and was prepared to write down any strengths

or flaws that the test-taker showed.


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Are you ready to begin, Callum? she asked formally. The young man nodded his head, since he

was too nervous to mutter a three-letter-word such as yes. Okay. First, start the car. Callum put

the key into the ignition and the wheel-less vehicle started floating one foot above the ground. He

proceeded to turn on the headlights and put the car into drive. Youre doing well do far. See, theres

nothing to be nervous about. Cathy was interrupted when her b-phone rang. She pressed the answer

button on the dragonfly-shaped cyborg and it eagerly flew up to her ear. Hello?

Cathy! said Amy, Im so glad youre there!

Im kind of busy, Amy. Is this serious? The hover car started driving down the street at almost

the right speed limit, stopping at the stop signs to look for any other hover cars going by before making

a turn.

Its Junior. He has entered the dreaded no phase.

Amy, its nothing to worry about. You have to accept that your child has hit that age when he

acts like a total jerk to his parents. Listen, two of my three kids havealready gone through this phase

and it will pass in due time

Callum! Get off the sidewalk! The

boy behind the steering wheel lost

his concentration for some reason

and had only half his hover car onthe road. Cathys voice started

sounding nervous as she continued

her statement. Besides, that big

day were going to have is only two

days away. Amy sighed with relief

amidst the banging and screaming

from her small child.

Yeah, youre right. I really

need that Caribbean cruise. I

really, really need it.

Im glad I could make you feel better. Meanwhile, a bump could be felt from the front of thetest vehicle. Callum stopped driving and started breathing heavily.

Mrs. Bertolli he said, I think I hit a cat.

Several days later, pretty much every character in the series (human and music monster) except

for Taro and Hiroko met at the portal station with their sleeping bags and tents. Things had changed

since weeks ago; several monsters had undergone drastic

transformations. Delilahs monster, Sasha, had mutated

from a nixie into a rex (above) and Mays monster, Emanuel,

had mutated from a drakoro into a mininigma. Adlai wasnt

too happy about being forced to go to The Rhythm and

Melody World. He wouldve much rather stayed in his room

playing video games. Unlike the forms of the two monsters

described, his sour attitude toward most things hadnt

changed in the slightest.

Youre abandoning us in the woods?! he said.

Honey, said Caitlin II, wearing her stylish fake fur

coat, Think of it as a camping trip. I need to relax and the

other adults need to relax so this is what we have planned

for you.


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But why do I have to be in charge of these little brats?

Taro was originally going to be in charge, but hes all depressed and refuses to come out of his

room. Besides, Uncle Giovannis monster Augusto will make sure everythings in check. Adlai felt

disheartened about these plans. Could things get any worse than being stuck in the woods with younger

children? No, they couldnt or at least thats what he thought.

In other words, yes, they are abandoning us in the woods, said Emmett while he was grasping

his flute case.

Aw cmon, said Flyer the miwreckmore as he was holding on to Emmetts shoulder, Cheer up.

Were going to be out in the woods with no adults and monsters lurking in the darkness. Nothing could

possibly go wrong.

The children went to the Rhythm and

Melody World escorted by Adlai and Augusto

the imperieckmore, the closest things they

had to responsible adults (which is pretty sad

if you think about it). They wandered through

the wooded land on the Continent of Te, rightwhere it met the Continent of Ray in the

north. The lands trees had twisted shapes

and bamboo shoots were situated on the

hillsides. Other than that, the ground barely

had any underbrush the ideal place for

tents. Yeep-yeeps and mingpays glided along

the wind and cooed at each other under the

calming other sun. Augusto the

imperieckmore knew exactly where to set up camp in a safe grove between the spiral trees.

Later that night, a bonfire was set up and Flyer the miwreckmore used his fire breath to get it

going. The children gathered around the fire and ate foodstuffs while basking in the warmth.


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The air outside was a little balmy since this particular area was near the equator, but it was still

cool compared to the roaring flame. Ferdie was asleep next to Emmett and Delilahs tent, wrapped in a

swaddle made of fake fur. He had been bottle fed earlier since he wasnt yet able to dine on hotdogs,

marshmallows, non-poisonous berries or fish from the river. Fortunately for the rest, it wasnt that easy

to interrupt his blissful slumber.


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Adlai was having an argument with Augusto the imperieckmore about his position as leader.

What the hell am I supposed to do? he asked, Ive never been in charge of a bunch of kids

before!

Why dont you engage them in a sing-along? asked Augusto, I hear that when the conditions in

The Rhythm and Melody World are just right, you can actually see the music as it is being played.

But all Ive got to go on is my moms old sheet music from when she was in an Aerosmith cover

band.

That will have to do. Now go out there and entertain them! Augusto knew that Adlai wasnt

thrilled to do this, so he pushed him along with his giant, green hands like he was expected onstage for a

cabaret act. The children stopped talking simultaneously and paid close attention to Adlais every move

as he was sitting down on the log. He started tuning his acoustic guitar and, sure enough, music notes

emerged from the strings as he plucked them, each one a different color. The children didnt want to

speak up for fear that they would feel the wrath of the oldest kid there.

You little maggots better keep shutting your mouths and sitting down because were going to

execute a sing-along, said Adlai.

How are we supposed to do a sing-along andshut up? pondered Emmett. That sounds

impossible.

Listen, do you want to sing and have a good time or do you want my Romanian-born foot rightup your half-Italian ass?! Emmett cringed and gulped.

Ill sing Adlai looked throughhis mothers stack of old Aerosmith songs and picked one out at

random. Okay, were going to sing the classic camp fire song Living on the Edge.

How come Ive never heard of that song? asked May.

Because you wet your bed at night. The other started giggling as May blushed, since this was

clearly a fact.

You promised you wouldnt tell!

Listen up because Im going to teach this songto you ungrateful swine.

Fifteen minutes later, the children learned their parts of the song and had a good time, even if

Adlai was singing the verses, the bridge and half of the chorus. The others were more like the backup

singers as they were swaying back and forth on the logs. This kind of defeated the purpose of calling it asing-along, but caring was the last thing they did.

Living on the edge

You cant stop yourself from faaaaalliiing

Living on the edge

You cant stop yourself at aaaaaaallll

Living on the edge

You cant stop yourself from faaaaalliiiing

Near the end of the song, they repeated those lines with gusto. Some kids even held up their b-

phones to make it look like they had lighters at a rock concert. By now, little Ferdie could detect the

noise and was turning in his sleep. Adlai strummed his guitar and sang his final line with the fervor of

Steven Tyler himself.

Yeeeeaaaaahhh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!!!!!!

Adlai nearly broke the guitar string from his big finale. The tips of his fingers were chafed and red,

but it felt rewarding since he had never played a song with back-up vocals before. The final line of the


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song woke Ferdie up and, as an infant, he didnt like being disturbed from his sleep one bit. He let

everyone know of his disturbance simply by screaming.

Oh, you really did it this time, said Emmett.

Well, hes yourbrother, you do something about it, replied Adlai. Emmett, Flyer the

miwreckmore and Augusto the imperieckmore got up to calm down the restless child.

Ferdinand had stopped bawling by the time they approached him but he was still unhappy and

unwilling to go back to sleep.

I know what will put him to sleep, said Augusto. He closed his eyes and started to sing a

traditional lullaby that just about every baby in the western world knew. Rock-a-bye baby, on the tree

top

Hes not into that outdated mumbo-jumbo, commented Emmett. Emmett then belted out a

tune that wasnt familiar to most babies, but was familiar to people who came of age in the 1970s.

Carry on my wayward son

There will be peace when you are done

Lay your weary head to rest

Dontyou cry no more

On the other hand, the lyrics did have that soothing, lullaby charm to them even if it was a classic

rock song. Ferdinand may not have known what the lyrics meant, but he became lost in them and

forgot why he was unhappy. His eyes closed and his state reverted back to the sleepiness that was

looming over him before.

Emmett returned to the bonfire with a satisfied smirk on his face signifying that he had

accomplished something.

So? inquired Adlai, What did you do?

I sang one of his favorite classic rock songs.

I sang a classic rock song and that was what made him cry in the first place.

Maybe you didnt do it right. Adlai was insulted by Emmetts remark and let him know his true

feelings by lifting his acoustic guitar by the neck and hitting Emmett over the head. A comical purplemark protruded from his skull soon after.

Ouch! You should treat your instrument with a little more respect, buddy.

Junior sat on the log and had a fun time participating in the merriment, whether it was sing-

alongs or slapstick, but he started having an itchy feeling atop his scalp. Every five seconds or so, he

would scratch it to make it go away. This itching simply would not cease and the areas became more

and more raw with the digging of each tiny nail. Adlai rested the acoustic guitar on his legs once more

to prepare for a new song.

Alright, kiddies, he said, How about we all sing a rousing rendition of Love in an Elevator?

Itchy, said Junior.

No, I dont know that song. Like a peckish monkey, Augusto the imperieckmore examined

Juniors hair for the source of his discomfort. He nearly jumped out of his feathers when he noticed the

tiny bugs hopping around and making themselves at home.

What is it, Augusto? asked Emmett.

Im afraid Junior has staccatos.

Staccatos?

Little bugs that enjoy drinking the sweet blood from the hair and fur of music monsters. Im

afraid well have to send little Junior home.

But his parents are on vacation, Adlai chimed.


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We have his grandparents contact information. You should probably call them to meet them at

the portal station. Adlai was just starting to have a good time with people that he didnt even like and

now he had to do something that he trulydidnt like no matter how hard you try to make it fun.

A little later, the children continued to chat around the fire like social chipmunks while Adlai

contacted Ayami and Juniors grandparents (the ones on their mothers side, since the ones on their

fathers side had died years ago if you had been paying attention to earlier plot lines). He no sooner

emerged from behind a spiral tree to make his announcement to the group.

Listen, you maggots, he said, I have to go to the portal station to drop off Junior. You guys

better not do anything stupid or youll pay for it by letting me wail on you. By now the children were so

used to Adlai threatening them that they didnt mind his warning.

These woods can be dangerous at night, so Im coming with you, said Augusto the

imperieckmore.

But Saul is my music monster partner.

Yes, but if you confronted a strong, angry monster and you had a choice between whether Saul

or an egg beater would protect you, I would certainly choose the egg beater.

Adlai and Augusto the imperieckmore walked away from the campsite with little Junior scratching

his head like he was contemplating a difficult math equation. At the same time, he was toddling along

so he could catch up with the older boy and the giant, green land bird. Adlais guitar lay right next toFerdinand as he was sleeping comfortably in his swaddle.

Adlai was once again in a bad mood. Darkness filled the entire plain and the light from his

flashlight was only confined to a small space. The air was frigid but felt relaxing when facing the right

direction. Junior could hardly keep up from all the itching that he was doing.

Junior! said Adlai as he shined the light in his direction, Come! Startled, Junior ran over to

Adlai, where he knew that he would be safe.

Are you sure you should be talkingto Junior like hes a dog? questioned Augusto.

Augusto, little kids need to be watched so they dont run off, dogs need to be watched so they

dont run off. Therefore, Junior is a dog.

Maybe I just shouldnt question your logic.The three of them went deeper into the forest of spiral trees but couldnt remember the direction

of the portal station. Augusto the imperieckmore was growing increasingly worried for reasons that he

didnt reveal until he asked Adlai a favor.

Can I see your flashlight? he asked. Adlai complied and handed him the flashlight, which he

used to shine a light on Juniors head. Its worse than I thought.

Whats wrong? asked Adlai as he got a closer look. Junior felt uncomfortable at them looking at

his scalp, but he sighed and allowed it.

Its worse than I thought. Those staccatos have been on his head for so long that theyve

developed a futuristic society that largely rivals our own. If one looked closely, he could see that the

little bugs had developed further, creating a tiny city with tiny buildings, tiny flying cars, tiny moving

sidewalks and the like.

All that itching is contagious, said Adlai as he scratched his own head.

Theyve colonized your scalp! Adlai felt the uncomfortable urge to scratch his itches even

though he knew not do to it.

No situation as annoying and seemingly inescapable couldve crossed his mind. That is how Junior

felt, too. Since he couldnt express it in words, he ran off into the dark woods. Junior, where are you

going? As Junior was running, he started to cry; he wanted no part of the situation and wanted to

wake up from this horrid nightmare that was unfortunately real. During his hissy fit, he tripped over a

protruding root and fell flat on his face.


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Quit playing games, Junior! shouted Augusto the imperieckmore. He stopped making light of

the situation when he heard little Junior screaming in the distance.

Come, boy! said Adlai. His assertive, inhumane tone didnt help make anything better, as Junior

continued to ignore their calls.

Nothing looked bleaker in those dark woods, but a strange, green glow escalated from Juniors

cloudy vision. Maybe it was hope or maybe an alien encounter. Either way, Junior was comforted by

its eerie presence.

There you are, said Augusto. He stopped in his

tracks as soon as he discovered the source of the

glowing. Right there was an imp; a green being with a

stubby horn on its head and a three-pronged tail; the

use for such a tail is up to your imagination.

So said an intrigued Adlai, Whats your

deal? The creature didnt answer at first; he only

cocked his head to the side like a curious chicken.

What are you, deaf? The creature, a monster species

called a ping, spoke words.

You look like you are hopelessly lost, he said ina tone that sounded almost like a mutter, Would you

like to come with me? The trio of desperate travelers didnt say anything. They didnt know how to

continue; should they trust this creature who is possibly misleading them or should they keep suffering?

This might be a trap, said Augusto.

But it might not.

But it might.

But it might not. To prevent this from lasting for all of eternity, Augusto gave in to Adlais

demands.

Alright. Lets follow this imp and see where he takes us.

They followed the ping until they reached a hole protruding from the ground like a cave. The ping

easily fit through the hole and slid down the tunnel to an unknown place underground.I knew there was a catch, said Adlai.

You wanted to follow him, said Augusto the imperieckmore, being more aggravated than usual.

The tunnel looked like it couldve been the home of a tiny bear and it was made of packed mud so it

wouldnt collapse (everybody knows how unreliable dirt can be as a building material).

It cant be that dangerous or else that green thing wouldnt have gone in there. Augusto

decided to try going into the hole first since it was his job to protect Adlai and Junior. You could say that

he was the green, abnormally large canary in the coal mine.

Here I go Augusto crawled oh-so-carefully into the hole and found it to be a cakewalk (or,

rather, a mud walk). Well, this isnt too GAAAAAAHH!!! Augusto fell down an unnoticeable hole as

soon as his enormous, cumbersome hand tried to touch the ground that wasnt there.

You heard him, Fido, said Adlai to Junior, Youre next! He pushed the poor child into the cave

until he, too, fell down the hole. Adlai just sat on his knees in the dark basking in his smugness and

being thankful that he was still above ground. He quickly stopped feeling superior when he started

feeling lonely and a bit scared. What the hell, it looks like fun. Fearlessly, he stuck his legs into the

mysterious hole and became victim to its slide-like qualities, just like the other two characters before

him.

Adlai, Junior and Augusto soon came out at the other side, to a place that looked like a small,

dark cavern.


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This is anticlimactic, commented Augusto the imperieckmore.

Youve yet to see the main course, said the ping, using a culinary euphemism.

The group followed him through the tunnel and found the most astounding thing since children

first discovered monsters made from music. Through that tunnel was a large metropolis far more

advanced than anything on the surface, though that probably isnt saying much. If you imagined a cross

between New York City and ancient China, you

basically have the main idea. There were sky

scrapers with oriental designs and city parks with koi

ponds that were pleasing to the eye. The streets

were filled with ping, but also had pings other

forms: quaddle (a baby monster that was green with

spikes on its head), unicone (a small, orange

quadruped with cones on its head and back), ozeo (a

giant, yellow and orange cat wearing cool gloves),

and vikeguar (a cross between a blue cougar and a seafaring Viking). Possibly the most interesting part

of the city was the fake sun and moon that went up and down as the hours passed.

Wh said Adlai, What is this place? Adlai was so amazed at the sight that he nearly had a

sensory overload; he almost forgot that he was miserable and itchy. Augusto already forgot that he was

hanging out with a couple of boys who were miserable and itchy.

Welcome to Serenade City, said the ping, The most advanced city in the Rhythm and MelodyWorld. The imp led them down the underground hill and into the street, where cars made from

hollowed stone were wheeling along the smooth pavement. Monsters in the streets were chatting and

selling things, though some negative activity, like a purse being stolen, was happening. Fortunately, the

monsters had some pretty good attack moves for when something like that happened.


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Adlai, Junior and Augusto trusted

the ping to lead them through the

oriental-inspired city, passing the

residences, noodle carts and medicine

shops. The scent of dust and spices

filled the air, scents that tickled the

gangs noses just right. The ping led

the weary travelers to a fancy purlple

building that sat near a clear river. The

sign outside the building said Clean

Bodies, Clean Heads and underneath it

was the word Sanitarium. This was

such a strange thing to happen to a

couple of unlucky fellows. Was it too

good to be true?

Whats a sanitarium? asked

Adlai, feeling a little groggy and still

very itchy. The ping giggled because heknew what was in store for them.

Just the place you need, he said. And that was all he said.

Back in the woods, the children were waiting patiently for Adlai and Augusto the imperieckmore

to return so they could resume their nighttime activities. Of course, these are children were talking

about, so their patience could only be measured by the tiniest scale.

When are they getting back? asked May. Are they lost?

Yes, said Aaron, jumping to a conclusion in a single bound. Saul the bassala resorted to looking

in the most unlikely places, like under rocks and leaves, since using his hound nose did not suffice.

One of us should go out and find them, said Delilah. Chastity was quick to volunteer her time.

I can do that! she said while daintily clapping her fingers. Being the nave girl she was, Chastitytreated this as a harmless task that anybody could do.

No you cant! said Aaron, You cant even untie your shoes by yourself!

For you information, theyre boots, and those things at the end of the laces always get in the

way! Just then, the other kids started pitching ideas and squabbling about how bad they were. It was

chaos until Emmett interfered.

You guys, stop it! said Emmett, If everybody can just settle down, you can hear myidea, which

is way better than any of yours!

Well, said Lloyd the unieye, Hes got myattention. Emmett went over to the leftover

foodstuffs and pulled out a bunch of assorted plastic straws that were lying near a pair of scissors. He

grasped every color in the spectrum and made sure nobody saw their bottoms. Were all going to pick

straws. Whoever has the longest will venture out with their music monster partner and find Adlai and

Junior and Augusto. The children gathered around Emmett and took their turns pulling straws, each

one secretly hoping that theirs was a short enough length. May took a good look at her straw and

sighed when she realized that hers was one of the cut ones. Aaron, on the other hand, was terrified.

His straw had not felt the blades of Emmetts scissors and was unchanged from when it was removed

from the package.

So who has the longest straw? asked Emmett for all to hear. Crickets and locusts could be

heard; nobody spoke up. Cmon I left one of those straws intact.


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Aaron has the longest straw! blurted out Declan being his little kid self instead of his pleasant,

poetic self. Aaron sank a little when everyone glared at him. He and Kelly the pelbo was far from

prepared for such a task.

Well Emmett invaded Aarons personal space by having his nose touch his, like a less

romantic version of an Eskimo kiss.

Why are you starring at me like that?

Because yours is the longest!

Thats what she said! commented Ayami while she was roasting a marshmallow. Needless to

say, this made quite a few kids turn their heads away from Aaron, if only temporarily.

I dont want to do this! said Aaron. He was normally calm and cool, but this situation brought

out the most fearful emotions.

I have a better idea, said Delilah sounding rational, We should just all go together. The

children thought about this for a brief second and agreed. They would defeat the strange feral monsters

easier if all their monsters worked together.

I dont know why we didnt think of that before, said May under her breath. The children let

the campfire to die a slow and peaceful death while they trekked through the mysterious night. Their

safety fell in the hands of weak monsters, ones hoping that nothing stronger than a firefly would stand

in their way.

Meanwhile, Adlai, Junior and Augusto gazed at the beauty around them. Sure, it was just a front

lobby, but everything about it screamed luxury; the fountain, the dragon statues, even the buxom ozeo

who was manning the front desk. The group stood out with their ravished outer features but they

suspected that those features were

about to disappear soon.

Please come this way, said one

of two kimono-clad ozeos standing

there, You humans are positively

filthy. She was a monster of few

words who lead them to partsunknown. They didnt know what the

heck was going to happen to them but

gut feelings told them that it was

probably going to be something

worthwhile.

The weary travelers entered a

room that had four extravagant tubs,

porcelain beauties that looked fit for

gods. Colorful soaps and shampoos

adorned the sides, each one still in their

packaging. Adlai and Augusto were so happy that their faces started aching from all of the smiling they

were doing.

Please strip your clothes while the tubs fill, said the ozeo, I will be getting some towels and all-

natural staccato-killing shampoo.

Spas usually arent my thing but this is pretty damn sweet, said Adlai as he removed his shirt.

Lets hope they hurry, said Augusto the imperieckmore, The staccatos on your head are about

to go to war with the staccatos on Juniors head. Sure enough, the tiny bugs on Adlais dirty scalp had

built a tiny missile that was just moments away from being fired.

Victory is ours! said a tiny, almost inaudible voice.


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A little later Adlai found himself melting into the warm water with bubble jets shooting at his bare

skin. One of the ozeo attendants was massaging his scalp with some special shampoo that was causing

the deaths of the tiny, tiny horrors atop his head but really, who cares about theirwellbeing? Adlai

was feeling so good, so euphoric, that he lost track of time and space unlike our other characters.

The other children trekked through the dark woods calling out the names of Adlai, Augusto and

Junior. They vocalized their calls all at the same time, causing them to be loud but unintelligible.

Why did we get Chastity to lead us anyway? asked Emmett.

Because Im the oldest one here, said Chastity in a smug tone.

That doesnt mean you know what youre doing!

Its not like youve accomplished anything! The others became more and more discouraged

with their efforts to find the rest of their group. In fact, they started thinking that they should have

stayed back at the camp site and waited a little longer like good little children.

Just like the last hopeless situation, a green glow with which we are all familiar appeared before

the group, one belonging to the species ping as you may have guessed. In fact, it was the same one.

More lost souls, he said to himself, What a night. He walked toward them. His presence from

the corner of Emmetts eye caused him to stop arguing with Chastity. You humans look lost. Would

you like to come with me to some shelter? The children all thought: what an opportunity! Well, exceptfor Chastity.

No thank you, chimed Chastity, Were not lost at all. We were finding some friends, who are

around here somewhere.

Yes! said Aaron, We need help! Were miserable out here! Aaron never got into his schools

drama club but he was pretty convincing to the strange monster. The ping smiled and turned his back to

the children.

Come with me, my fair urchins.

At the sanitarium, Adlai and Junior were staccato-free and clean as whistles. It had been many a

moon when their skin was that soft and sweet-smelling, especially of cucumber-melon. Now that their

outsides were clean, they needed to get the impurities out from the inside by excreting them throughthe pores in their skin. Junior was too young to go into the sauna but Adlai spent his sweet time in there

with Augusto the imperieckmore, even though Augusto was of a species that was unable to sweat.

How are we going to pay for this? asked Adlai as he put more water on the steaming coals,

Dont things like this cost money?

Ive got it covered, said Augusto, who didnt really need to wear a towel, Ive got some money

with me. Always come prepared. Adlai could relax a little better knowing the contents of Augustos

wallet. Unfortunately, money has the habit of

disappearing for one reason or another.

After the sauna, Adlai laid the front part of

his body onto a cushiony spread while he rested

his chin on his hands. Two quaddles bounced up

and down on his back as hard as they could to

give him a deep massage. Adlais body was so

relaxed that it felt like pudding, or Jello, or any

other soft dessert that a person with a toothache

could enjoy.

A little lower, said Adlai.

Be patient, said one of the quaddles,

There are years of tension in your shoulder


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regions alone. These monsters were just babies but they were expert masseuses and knew more about

human muscle than most humans knew.

Like Adlai and Augusto, the other children trusted the ping to take them to safety since they had

become quite desperate (not to mention cranky). They followed him down his hidey-hole and into the

dimly lit tunnel that led to the city. By now, they were far away from their camping equipment and even

farther away from the expectations of their camping trip.

This tunnel connected to a different entrance to the city. There wasnt any way the ping couldve

found the exact same one as he did when he met Adlai; there were just so many of them. This one led

to a slummy-looking street on the outskirts that had bungalows and soup kitchens. However, the

children were still impressed by the existence of any habitable area in a seemingly uninhabitable space

like the underground. The ping finally stopped at a church. This churchs architecture had Asian

influence like the rest of the city but also had stain glass windows with pictures of valleys and legendary

music monsters sort of like east meets west. In front of the church was a statue of Hikari, the

legendary monster of light.

You kids look like you need a place to stay, said the ping, Other than that, you dont look that

miserable.

Inside the cathedral was a rescue mission for homeless monsters. The children were the only

humans there, not to mention the only beings there at present. They were placed in a dingy room in the

basement with cots that were perfectly aligned in rows. It may not have been luxurious to somebody

who was well off but to a hobo, it was heaven.

The children were chatting, playing, and teasing by the cots. Baby Ferdinand was laying flat on his

back on a blanket. He seemed anxious and uncomfortable to the point where he was flailing his little

legs. Unfortunately for Lloyd the unieye and Saul the bassala, there were certain parental duties that

had to be fulfilled no matter how repulsive they looked. I think you know what were talking about


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Why do I have to do this? complained Saul.

Because when Augusto and Adlai disappeared,

they left us in charge of the kids, and that includes

changing the diapers, said Lloyd the unieye. Besides,

you have bigger claws so you would have an easier time

getting the job done.

Oh, so you want me to maim the child as well as

clean him? Because thats what street sweepers are for,

LLOYD.

Aaron was doing his usual starring out into space

and thinking, the only time when he could be himself. He

was doing other things, too, like wiggling his feet and

tapping his fingers on the slightly dusty linoleum floor.

Is anything bothering you, bro? asked Chastity. Aaron sighed.

Oh, nothing, he said. He was obviously wrong since he had more to say on the subject. Mom

and Dad and the other parents wanted us to go on an authentic camping experience, something that is

hard to do in these modern times, and instead we find ourselves in a city taking advantage of shelter in a

warm, dry building. Thats not exactly a camping experience.Mom and Dad just wanted to get rid of us by any means necessary, said Chastity. Youre

smarter than me so I cant believe you havent figured that out by now. Besides, this place isnt exactly

Buckingham Palace.

Saul, for Petes sake! said Lloyd from across the room, Dont rub his nose in it!

I thought thats what youre supposed to do, said Saul, I should know, Im a dog. Bad baby!

You have better things to do in your pants!

At the sanitarium, Adlais grooming and rehabilitation were complete and not a moment too

soon. The fake ceramic moon that was hung to remind everyone of the time of day moved higher in the

so-called night sky. Adlais wristwatch read a quarter to eleven while he sprawled out on his elegant

bed wearing his perfect-fitting bathrobe. Good luck statues of yoshibaras (cat-like monsters wearingponchos) adorned the room, though reproductions of those statues were found in every room like it.

Junior had an entire other bed to himself, which meant that he could jump on it as much as he

wanted. Adlai hadnt said a word for awhile and Augusto the imperieckmore was busy in the bathroom

brushing his um beak razor, so Adlai decided to talk to Junior. Junior eventually wore himself out

from all that jumping and decided to lie on his back just like Adlai.

You know, Junior, started Adlai. Just saying Juniors name caught his attention right away.

Dont tell anybody else this, but out of all the other children, I think I like you the best. Unlike those

other kids, you stay quiet and dont argue or say things that make me want to hit you with a hammer.

Unfortunately, youre at the age where youre just learning how to communicate verbally, so this stage

of your life wont last very long. Im not against free speech or anything, but our world would be a

better place if more people just shut their mouths. Just the way Adlai said those words made Junior

feel appreciated, even if he didnt entirely understand them. His vocabulary was mostly made up of the

words mine, no, mommy, daddy, and cookie, and Adlai hoped that it would stay that way.

Im bushed, said Augusto the imperieckmore, Lights out. Nobody objected to his decision to

go to bed, so Adlai and Junior went along with it and accepted their visit from the sandman.

At the less glamorous rescue mission, all the children and monsters were asleep in their cots.

Despite the creepy atmosphere and the radiator that wouldnt quit making noise, they were slumbering


16/20

quite peacefully. Saul the bassala, who was sharing a cot with Lloyd the unieye, was having a pleasant

and slightly disturbing dream that caused him to spoon Lloyd like a romantic college student.

Mr. Jelly Donut, muttered Saul in his sleep, You seem to have a gaping wound. Here, let me

clean the area for you With that, he wrapped his mouth around the back of Lloyds head, slobbering

profusely and drenching his pink fur. Yes, it was about to be a long night.

The next morning, the children left the rescue mission to pursue their search for the missing

members of their group. Emmett, making the smart decision to be alpha male of the pack, asked the

strange-looking residents for the whereabouts of their fellow campers. So far, nobody could give a

positive answer to the question have you seen a two-year-old child and an adolescent jerk-face

following a giant green bird?

Lloyd the unieye and Saul the bassala were in the midst of an argument while they were following

the group.

Its going to take me more than one shampooing to get your saliva out of my fur! said Lloyd.

At least I know how to properly raise children unlike YOU! said Saul. His comeback had

nothing to do with the topic of fur care, but that didnt stop him.

Me? Youre the one who treats babies like theyre dogs!

Lloyd, babies need constant attention, dogs need constant attention. Therefore, babies aredogs.

You know, Im really starting to question your musician partners logic and ethics.

Saywhat you want, but they make sense.

You guys! said Emmett, That giant black cat in the Viking garb over there told me that he did

see two humans and an imperieckmore at the spa down the street! A random monster just so

happened to see a few of the only humans in the entire city. Good news sure does come fast, doesnt

it?

The children eventually found the sanitarium amidst the detailed architecture. Everything to

them was definitely noticeable and out of the ordinary the carpet, the statues and everything else.

None of the children thought that this would be a place where Adlai and Junior would go.

Perfect timing Adlai and Junior emerged from the stairway to check out right after two hours ofwatching cartoons on the cable TV that was provided. Adlai was a bit startled to find the rest of the

group starring at him.

Hey, guys, he said as though it was no big deal.

Weve been looking all over for you! said Emmett, We had to put up with sleeping in dingy cots

and youve been living in luxury all this time? How do I even begin to comprehend this?

Well, its a funny story how I arrived here Just then, Augusto the imperieckmore ran out of

the fancy double doors located to the left of the lobby. He was terrified to an immense degree,

clutching his gigantic hands to his head as if he was keeping something from escaping his skull.

Augusto, my man, whats wrong? Augusto gulped and took a

deep breath before giving them the bad news.

You guys he said, I just lost all of our money. Adlai

flinched from hearing that startling piece of information.

You mean all the money in your pockets?

Yes.

Every single cent in your bank account?

Uh-huh.

How the hell did this happen?!

Is it a bad time to mention that Im a compulsive

gambler? Adlai rolled his eyes and turned his gaze towards


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the other children, who were as confused and irate as any of their parents would be if they were here.

Your bill, sir, said the kimono-clad ozeo behind the reception desk. In her paw was a sheet of

paper with all of the treatments that were given in the order that they were given, along with numbers

written on the far right side. At the bottom was the price of the entire stay at the sanitarium a

number that was unbelievably high, so high that some of the kids couldnt count past it.

Are you guys positive that you put the decimal in the right place? asked Adlai. Adlais pupils

dashed back and forth across his eyeballs. That fight-or-flight response so synonymous with anxiety was

fueling his actions. Everybody run!!! Adlai burst through the double doors to escape the fact that he

was screwed really, really screwed. The receptionist glared at the other children and their monsters,

even though they had nothing to do with this.

Are any of you urchins going to foot the bill? Just the sight of the high number intimidated the

children so much; reminding them that high school level math wasnt so far away in their young lives.

Every monsterfor himself! shouted Flyer the miwreckmore.

Security! The receptionist pressed a special button behind the desk that summoned two

vikeguars in police uniforms faster than one could say snafu. By then, the children and the monsters

ran through the double doors, leaving behind nothing but the sounds of their little footprints. And the

chase was on.

Behind the double doors was a casino that was almost as big and fancy as one in Las Vegas

(almost Paul Anka was nowhere to be found). The place was filled with monsters who were gaining

money, losing money and enjoying colorful drinks. When the children noticed the axe-wielding cougars

chasing them, they pulled a sneaky move; they split up so that the three vikeguars would only

concentrate on chasing some of them. The others were safe for now.Emmett was one of the unlucky few who were being directly pursued by one of the security

personnel. As he was hiding behind a slot machine, he spotted a couple of pings wearing all black from

their heads to their tiny toes. He bravely approached them, not knowing their business, if they had any.

Can you guys do me a favor? he asked. The nice monsters smiled and complied, agreeing to do

his bidding without using words.


18/20

Emmett waited out in the open for the security personnel to find

him, which he eventually did. As soon as his developed cat vision

caught sight of the adolescent, he ran over to him with his arm

extended so he could grab him.

Now! shouted Emmett as he was about to flinch. The pings

dressed in black dropped down from the ceiling and struck fighting

poses. The security guard was a little confused at first but things went

awry for him when the little ninjas attacked parts of his body. This left

plenty of time for Emmett to escape. The ninjas werent able to take

the guard down since he was a higher level, but they certainly

distracted him and caused quite a ruckus.

We move on to our next shenanigan, caused by Aaron and Kelly

the pelbo. The guard chasing them was even more threatening than

the last he ran while swinging his axe. Aaron took advantage of the

short amount of time when he was out of his sight to hurry upstairs to

a loft where broken slot machines and spare poker tables were stored.

Kelly the pelbo was quickly cornered by the guard. The guard lifted his enormous axe into the air,preparing to slice the baby monster like a piece of raw fish. Kelly wasnt afraid in the least bit.

Wait! she said. The guard stopped being angry and unforgiving and decided to listen to what

Kelly had to say. You can persecute me to the fullest extent using your chopping implement, but that

will only enforce the stereotype of the ruthless, power-hungry Viking.

The guard wasnt too bright and started tilting his horned helmet to the

left to scratch his head.

What does per-see-kyoot mean? he asked.

Your answer is up there. Kelly pointed toward the ceiling. The

guard, being dimwitted and gullible, looked upwards for the answer, but it

didnt come in the form of an omnipresent sky being; instead it came in

the form of Aaron pushing a busted slot machine over the edge of the loft.The machine came crashing down on top of the vikeguar guard and made

a noise like a mini mechanical apocalypse.

Ugh said the guard.

I guess curiosity killed the cat! remarked Aaron.

In this case, it injured him in a manner befitting a certain cartoon

coyote, inquired Kelly the pelbo.

May and Emanuel the mininigma stopped running frantically to look

around the bustling setting.

Any particular reason youre letting him catch up to us? asked Emanuel.

We cant run around forever, said May, Weve gotta hide! Almost immediately, May spotted

a cart draped with a stylish white cloth. The ozeo who was guiding it was chatting it up with the ozeo

who was shooting craps. Bingo! The ozeo waitress didnt notice the little girl and the young monster

lifting up the cloth to hide in the bottom part of the cart; they made sure that the drinks on top werent

disturbed.

We cant hide forever, either, said Emanuel the mininigma, sounding somewhat annoyed. A

janitor ozeo passed by with a broom. He decided to lean the broom against the cart since he had no

janitorial tasks, at least none that were visible. May, being speedy with her arms, grabbed the broom

from behind the cloth and turned it upside-down. With the stick side down, she forced it toward the


19/20

ground to get the cart moving. What are you doing?! If this is your idea of getting away, we couldve

just ran! As the cart was gaining speed, its wheels wobbled a bit from the Mays control of the broom

not being entirely even. Monsters moved out of the way, confused at the acceleration of the ghost

cart. May wasnt quite sure where the cart was heading, but curiosity got the best of her and she

peeked at the outside world from beyond the cloth.

Ahhh!!! she screamed. She realized too late that the cart was headed toward the wall and, as

good as her reflex skills were, she couldnt react in time. The child and monster duo felt unpleasant

vibes as the resulting crash shook up the cart and caused the drinks on top to spill.

With nowhere else to go, May grabbed Emanuel the mininigma and used her feet as her mode of

transport once again. Using her instinct of survival, she pushed open the first door she approached and

dashed up the three stairs that lead to the backstage of a theater. A show was already in progress

frisky female vikeguars were dressed in vibrant outfits and doing the can-can for the rowdy males in the

audience. The dancers shrieked and threw off their concentration and synchronization when the young

human dashed across the stage and stepped on

their humungous back paws. By then, the

vikeguar guard had caught up with May and also

made his way across the stage. He was within

fifteen feet of the child, but became distracted byone of the dancers and her dazzling, Vegas-style

beauty. He was swooning too much to care about

the cat-and-mouse chase or his other duties.

Hey babe, said the guard, You might not

realize this, but you look a lot like my next

girlfriend. The dancer wasnt very impressed

with the first impression, so like the wildcat she

was, she slapped him across the face. Call me.

Eventually, all the children found Augusto

the imperieckmore and followed him, hoping that

he would protect them from any of the axe-wielding psychopaths known as policemen. He

knew he wouldnt stand a chance against two top-

levels monsters and that he couldnt stand the

thought of having a criminal record, so he high-

tailed it instead of fighting them off. Some say this

is cowardly, but things were difficult enough

already and an escape was in order.

Come, children! he ordered (as if they wouldntrun without his orders). The children and

monsters followed him through the exit and into the fancy Asian-style garden, complete with cherry

blossom trees and a large koi pond. They dashed across a busy intersection, causing cars to stop short

for the group that had no time to pay attention to the walk/dont walk sign.

Augusto was running fast, but he was making rational decisions (excluding the whole crosswalk

ordeal). Looking around, he saw a set of shafts on the very edge of the city. Each shaft had up and

down arrows that lit up when they were pushed. This could only mean one thing.

Elevators! shouted Aaron. The group sprinted to one that wasnt being used. Adlai pushed the

up arrow many, many times in a row, even though the elevator was going as fast as it could.

Ithink I lost ten pounds, said Lloyd the unieye, wilting like an undernourished houseplant. The

door chimed as it slowly opened for the group, who barely waited until it was finished exposing the

entire inside.


20/20

You guys go on ahead, said Augusto, Im going to fly. Adlai impatiently pushed the elevator

close button multiple times, once again thinking that it would close faster if he did so. The door closed

slowly, and thankfully, the guards never did catch up to them. The elevators cables lifted the children

to supposed safety while relaxing them with its upward pulling motion.

That was too close, said Chastity.

I think we learned a lesson from all this, said Delilah.

And what is that? asked Emmett.

Living in the wilderness might be hard, but sometimes civilization can be just as harsh and

unforgiving.

Amen to that, agreed Adlai.

After that experience, the children were obliged to spend the rest of the weekend in the woods,

where they didnt have to worry about policemen, traffic or having to pay anybody. They never did

figure out how a humongous civilization was built underground or why anybody would put a casino right

next to a sanitarium, but what they did learn was that luxury isnt always luxurious.

Documents

Music Monster Mini Adventures Episode 11: They're Society's Problem