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Murphys Laws in sex

1. The more beautiful the woman is who loves you, the easier it is to leave her with

no hard feelings.

2. Nothing improves with age.

3. No matter how many times you've had it, if it's oered take it, beause it'll never

be !uite the same again.

". #e$ has no alories.

%. #e$ takes up the least amount of time and auses the most amount of trouble.

&. There is no remedy for se$ but more se$.

. #e$ appeal is %() what you've got and %() what people think you've got.

*. No se$ with anyone in the same o+e.

. #e$ is like snow- you never know how many inhes you are going to get or how

long it is going to last.

1(. man in the house is worth two in the street.

11. /f you get them by the balls, their hearts and minds will follow.

12. 0irginity an be ured.

13. hen a man's wife learns to understand him, she usually stops listening to

him.

1". Never sleep with anyone raier than yourself.

1%. The !ualities that most attrat a woman to a man are usually the same ones

she an't stand years later.

1&. #e$ is dirty only if it's done right.

1. /t is always the wrong time of month.

1*. The best way to hold a man is in your arms.

1. hen the lights are out, all women are beautiful.

2(. #e$ is hereditary. /f your parents never had it, hanes are you won't either.

21. #ow your wild oats on #aturday night Then on #unday pray for rop failure.

22. The younger the better.

23. The game of love is never alled o on aount of darkness.

2". /t was not the apple on the tree but the pair on the ground that aused the

trouble in the garden.

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2%. #e$ disriminates against the shy and the ugly.

2&. 4efore you 5nd your handsome prine, you've got to kiss a lot of frogs.

2. There may be some things better than se$, and some things worse than se$.

4ut there is nothing e$atly like it.

2*. 6ove your neighbor, but don't get aught.

2. 6ove is a hole in the heart.

3(. /f the eort that went in researh on the female bosom had gone into our spae

program, we would now be running hotdog stands on the moon.

31. 6ove is a matter of hemistry, se$ is a matter of physis.

32. 7o it only with the best.

33. #e$ is a threeletter word whih needs some oldfashioned fourletter words to

onvey its full meaning.

3". 8ne good turn gets most of the blankets.

3%. 9ou annot produe a baby in one month by impregnating nine women.

3&. 6ove is the triumph of imagination over intelligene.

3. /t is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.

3*. Thou shalt not ommit adultery.....unless in the mood.

3. Never lie down with a woman who's got more troubles than you.

"(. bstain from wine, women, and song- mostly song.

"1. Never argue with a women when she's tired or rested.

"2. woman never forgets the men she ould have had- a man, the women he

ouldn't.

"3. hat matters is not the length of the wand, but the magi in the stik.

"". /t is better to be looked over than overlooked.

"%. Never say no.

"&. man an be happy with any woman as long as he doesn't love her.

". :olks playing leapfrog must omplete all ;umps.

"*. 4eauty is skin deep- ugly goes right to the bone.

". Never stand between a 5re hydrant and a dog.

%(. man is only a man, but a good biyle is a ride.

%1. 6ove omes in spurts.

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%2. The world does not revolve on an a$is.

%3. #e$ is one of the nine reasons for reinarnation- the other eight are

unimportant.

%". #mile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking.

%%. 7on't do it if you an't keep it up.

%&. There is no dierene between a wise man and a fool when they fall in love.

%. Never go to bed mad, stay up and 5ght.

%*. 6ove is the delusion that one woman diers from another.

%.