Contents

Introducing Field Representatives

Why Ministry with Men?

What is Ministry with Men?

Vision

Strategy

Team

Goals

Men’s Small Groups

Ministry with Men Survey

Ministry with Men Strategic Planning Tool

THE SEVEN PROMISES OF A PROMISE KEEPERA Promise Keeper is committed to:

1. Honouring Jesus Christ through worship, prayer and obedience to God’s Word in the power of the Holy Spirit.

2. Pursuing vital relationships with a few other men, understanding that he needs brothers to help him keep his promises.

3. Practicing spiritual, moral, ethical and sexual purity.

4. Building strong marriages and families through love, protection and biblical values.

5. Supporting the mission of his church by honouring and praying for his pastor and by actively giving his time and resources.

6. Reaching beyond any racial and denominational barriers to demonstrate the power of biblical unity.

7. Influencing his world, being obedient to the Great Commandment (Mark 12:30,31) and the Great Commission (Matthew 28:19,20).

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Grow Your Men, Grow Your Church

PASTORS& MEN’SMINISTRYLEADERS

MEN

Transforming Ordinary Guys Into

Extraordinary Men

Here to Help the Men of Your Church

COACHING & FIELD REPRESENTATIVES

EVENTS & RESOURCES

April 2011

Field Representatives - We’re Here to Help!

Establishing an effective Men’s Ministry is challenging for any church. It takes commitment and resources over a period of several years. The Promise Keepers Field Representative network is a way that men can help men succeed at a local level. Consult with a Field Representative to chart a way forward for your church using key tips, ideas and strategies. You benefit from quick and easy access to the Field Representative in your region. We are here to discuss the best way to advance your Men’s Ministry and recommend other resources where needed. The service is free, although some resources are available on a donation basis.

Who Are We?

Field Representatives have proven experience in Ministry with Men. We are volunteers who are committed to seeing growth in Ministry with Men and are willing to share our experience. Field Representatives have ongoing training in addition to benefitting from the experience of others in the network. We have access to Promise Keepers information and resources and Coaching staff. If your specific enquiry is outside our personal experience, we can still find the answers for you.

Field Representatives - another way Promise Keepers is working with local churches so that everyone wins!

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WHY MINISTRY WITH MEN?

Gender Gap

The average gender gap in NZ churches is 39% men and 61% women.1 In the Anglican Church, women make up 67.8% of their congregations; in Union/Co-operating parishes it is 66%, and in the Presbyterian Church, it is 64.1%, with the other leading denominations not far behind.2 In most churches that close their doors, it has been the men who have left first.

1 The 2001 NZ Church Life Survey, NCLS Research, Attender Demographics2 Dr Peter Lineham, Massey University 2010

Men’s Influence

Men can be positive influencers – especially of families.

If a child comes to Christ first – 3.5% of families will follow.

If Mum comes to Christ first – 17% of families will follow.

If Dad comes to Christ first – 93% of families will follow.

Why Men Are Important For Churches

1. Men’s focus on the outside world promotes church health - Men make things happen. Men expand the church and its influence in the world. Their outward focus is a gift to the church. Without a masculine spirit the church turns inward. It begins to minister primarily to the family in here instead of the world out there.

2. Men’s orientation toward risk promotes church health - Men are hard-wired for risk taking. In the parable of the talents (Matt 25:14-30), the master praises two servants who invested their assets and produced more, but he curses the servant who played it safe. He who avoids all risk is, in the words of Jesus, “wicked and lazy” (v 26).

3. Men’s pragmatism brings innovation to the church - Men are always trying to improve things. They’re tinkerers. A generation ago men like Rick Warren and Bill Hybels asked, “How can we do church better?” The results are Saddleback and Willow Creek... two churches that have scads of committed men.

4. Men bring strength to the church - Gordon Dalbey notes, “A unique and truly awesome power arises when men gather together: the power which God gives especially to men collectively, to get His work done in the world”.

5. Men bring money to the church - A straight-shooting pastor once told me, “When she comes to church and he doesn’t, you get the tithe off the grocery money. When they come together, you get the tithe off the pay cheque”.

6. Men bring their families to church - In Acts 16 Paul and Silas shared the gospel with their jailer. The man was instantly changed. He immediately took the apostles to his house, where they shared Christ with his family. In the Bible, fathers lead their children to God, not the other way around.

7. Godly men attract women - Without dynamic, life-giving men, a church will eventually lose its women as well, especially the younger ones.

Excerpted from Why Men Hate Going to Church by David Murrow

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What Men Are Looking Forby Steve Sonderman

1. Relevance - The most important issues for men are their work, family, marriage, sexuality, and finances.

2. An important cause - Men want to be involved in something driven by a compelling vision.

3. Greatness - Men want to be heroes. Give them a vision for what they can become.

4. A challenge - Men are seeking risk, adventure, change, competition, and expansion. Tell them how to find it within the mission of Jesus.

5. Action - Men want to be active in making a difference. Their desire for adventure is often expressed in the desire to be on the solution side of things.

6. Leadership - They want to follow a bold, courageous, visionary leader.

7. Fun - The world is a serious place. Men are looking to laugh and have fun to balance that reality.

8. Brothers - The church is the place where men should come to see healthy male friendships being modelled. Men need teaching on how to develop and strengthen friendships.

9. Healing - Men are carrying the burden of wounds, hurts and brokenness that need to be healed.

How Do You Grow Your Men?

Promise Keepers Survey results confirm that the greatest desire of men in the church is to grow spiritually. The desire is there, but is there a process available in most churches to develop men’s spirituality and to grow men into leaders?

The list of “what men are looking for” spells out some key things that men are looking for in their lives. All of those should be available in church but seldom are. Churches need to be able to offer men a pathway from dealing with their brokenness, to training and building them up, to challenge and mission. All this in the context of an engaged, interactive community of men.

A successful Ministry with Men mobilises men to spiritual growth and builds genuine friendships so that real mission can be accomplished. Promise Keepers NZ Benchmark Survey of Men’s Ministries

MEN’S TOP PRIORITIES60

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Spiritual growth

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Relationshipwith wife

Fatherhood/children

Balance work/home/church

Handlingfinances

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• MinistrywithMencallsandequipsmenforbiblicalmanhood.

• Itinvolvesmen-onlyactivities,notmixedgenderorfamilyactivities.

• Itincludesministrywitheverymaninyourchurch.

• Ittakes3-5yearstobuildaneffectiveMinistrywithMen.

• Thereisonlya9%likelihoodofsuccessifthereisnopastorinvolvement.

• MinistrywithMenisaBIGdeal!

• Itshouldbebasedonthetwinpillarsof spiritual growth and building friendships, with an outward focus on mission.

Men’s Ministry is not rocket science: it’s harder. Patrick Morley

Goal: Leave No Man Behind

• Howdoyouconnecteverymaninthechurch?

• MinistrywithMenshouldberelationship-notprogram-driven.

• Developastrategyandprocesstobringmenout of isolation and build deeper friendships.

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WHAT IS MINISTRY WITH MEN?

No purpose > conflict No passion > complacency No vision > confusion

A dynamic Men’s Ministry begins with a clear understanding of what you are trying to achieve.

Vision - describes a destination:

Where are we going now? Where is our church taking men?

Where is God calling us to go? Where is our vision taking us?

If you don’t know where you’re going, you might wind up somewhere else. Yogi Berra

Where there is no vision, the people perish. Proverbs 29:18

Creating Vision

1. Gather the key men in your church (including your pastor) to establish your vision.2. Use the church’s vision as a plumb line for the vision of the Men’s Ministry to align with.3. Pray - it is critical to listen to God and hear His heartbeat for your ministry.

4. Is your vision big enough?If your vision doesn’t scare you – it’s too small. Angus Buchan

5. Is it compelling?If I have learned one thing during my years of Ministry to Men, it’s that men want to be involved in something driven by a compelling vision. Men want to know what hill the church is climbing, where we are going [and] what we are about. Steve Sonderman

6. Brainstorm ideas for the vision.7. Allow sufficient time to process – remember vision is important and it should propel your

Men’s Ministry for up to 5 years.8. Vision is best written down – everyone is focussed on the same destination, and this also

allows you to evaluate progress and be held accountable for it.

Write down the vision and make it plain... so that whoever reads it may run with it. Habakkuk 2:2

Communicating Vision

Summarise your vision into a statement that is easy to remember and easy to repeat. Develop a longer statement to flesh out your vision and explain it.

You can’t just blow vision all over the church and hope that it will happen.Bill Hybels

Casting Vision

Vision needs to be continuously cast. For example, through: term planners; letterheads; notices (written and spoken); messages; conversations, etc.

Vision leaks! Bill Hybels

Checking Vision

Vision is your plumb line. Every activity you undertake should be checked against your vision – this helps you avoid going off target. Your vision needs to be checked and reviewed once a year.

VISION

GOALSSKILLSSTRATEGYVISIONPASSIONPURPOSE

Resource Sheet: Inspirational Vision - The key to keeping men involved

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No correct strategy > chaos

Once vision has been gained, a realistic, workable strategy must be developed – one that has the power to translate the vision into reality.

How Will We Achieve the Vision?

•Howwillweidentifythestrategyneeded?

•Howwillweimplementthestrategy?

•Howwillweseeourmengrowspiritually?

Strategy is BiblicalStrategy and strategic planning are all through Scripture:

•Nehemiah–buildingthewall

•Moses–spiesintheland

•Joshua–BattleofJericho

•Jesus–GreatCommission

Create/Capture/Sustain MomentumYour strategy needs to link activities together in a way that creates growth. Without a successful strategy, you are in danger of simply filling up the calendar.

Successful Strategy

Carefully consider the activities you will put time into-lessismore!Strategyisaboutleverageandisintentional. Does it help you to leave no man behind? A good strategy is measurable, and it should be customised for your Men’s Ministry.Will your strategy create a process/pathway that leads to spiritual growth and building friendships in your men?

STRATEGY

GOALSSKILLSSTRATEGYVISIONPASSIONPURPOSE

Starting Pointfor next year

Resource Sheets:

•PlanningGuideforMen’sMinistry Events

•FollowingaPromiseKeepersEvent - Bringing the Fire Home

•HoldingaLocalMen’sEventto Promote the Promise Keepers Event

FRIENDS

BROTHERS

CONVERT

FOLLOWER

DISCIPLE

LEADER

ACQUAINTANCES

OUTREACHMISSION

It’s all about me• Isolated• Uninvolved• Lacking commitment

It’s all about friends/family• Becoming involved• Getting to know friends’

families• Building deeper friend-

ships

It’s all about others• Loyal, committed• Working together• Role model• Band of brothers

It’s all about God• Focussed on serving others • Motivated by needs of

others• Dying to self

• Social activities• Breakfasts• Projects

• Promise Keepers Events• Training• Courses• Camps

• Men’s Small Groups• Group Bible studies• Discipling/mentoring

• Mission & ministry• Mission trips• Discipling/fathering next

generation in the faith• Leading men’s groups

“Come and see” (John 1:38-39)

• Shallow• Passive• Superficial

“Follow Me” (Mark 1:16-17)• Praying for others• Reading Bible regularly• Becoming active in church• Seeking God’s direction

“Be with Me” (Mark 3:13-14)

• Able to receive correction & encouragement

• Prepared to be sacrificial• Maturing spiritually

“Go” (Mark 16:15)• Evangelistic• Fully committed to ex-

tending God’s kingdom• Fruitful

FRIENDSHIP MILESTONES ACTIVITIES SPIRITUAL CHARACTERISTICS

The Twin Pillars of Men’s Ministry

Men’s greatest needs today are to grow spiritually and build real friendships with men who can speak truth into their lives. The Twin Pillars of Men’s Ministry graphic shows how a Ministry with Men can achieve this and fulfil the ultimate purpose of the mission we have been called to do.

Certain kinds of activities will produce certain kinds of outcomes. If your Ministry with Men consists of breakfasts and social activities, the result will be a group of men who are acquainted with one another, but have limited opportunities for consistent spiritual input. The value of camps, courses and Promise Keepers Events is that they provide a focused time for men to grow deeper spiritually and begin building genuine friendships. They allow a smooth transition to the next level, which is becoming involved in Men’s Small Groups and mentoring. Here they will become bonded as brothers with other men and grow to be mature disciples of Christ, propelling them towards leadership and mission.

The key to the Twin Pillars is that of connection and leverage. How do we connect the activities in our Men’s Ministry in such a way that one level of activity leads to the next? How can we leverage a social event into something deeper? Churches that understand the Twin Pillars will strategically place events and activities one after another, drawing men along a process of deepening friendship and greater spiritual growth.

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No skills > confidence crisis

Asking one man to lead the Men’s Ministry alone is a recipe for disaster – it needs a committed team.

Which roles does our strategy require?

•Whichskillsareneeded?

•Whichmenhavethoseskills?

Our Model: Jesus called and trained twelve men.

He later sent disciples out two by two.

In the New Testament Church, God “gave some to be apostles, some to be prophets, some to be evangelists and some to be pastors and teachers”. Ephesians 4:11

Team Size: The size of your team determines the size of your Men’s Ministry. The aim is for the team to represent all the men in the church. It must involve a key man for each area of your strategy.

Team Roles: Roles are vital. Each man on your team needs a clearly defined role.

•Pastor

•TeamLeader

•PrayerLeader

•Leadersfor:SocialActivities,Projects,Breakfasts,PromiseKeepersEvents,Courses&Training,Camps

•Men’sSmallGroupLeader

•Mission/OutreachLeader(s)–e.g.Widows&SolosMinistry,ShortTermMissionTrips

•YouthPastor/Leader

•Administrator

Job Descriptions: Job descriptions are a useful tool. They clarify roles and responsibilities.

Resource Sheet:Roles&Responsibilities Within a Men’s Ministry Team

Team Selection: Selection of the right men is critical.

•Prayer is vital in the selection of the right men. Jesus prayed all night before selecting twelve disciples(Luke6:12-13).Haveyouprayedandfastedbeforecallingmentothisministry?

• Identify the right men. Six guidelines for identifying leaders:

1. Character - Determines how a person will act and react in certain situations. It can be observed in:

•Family

•Conductwithothers

•Spiritualdisciplines-i.e.Biblestudy/prayer

•Speech

•Honestyandloyalty

GOALSSKILLSSTRATEGYVISIONPASSIONPURPOSE

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GOALSSKILLSSTRATEGYVISIONPASSIONPURPOSE

GOALS

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2. Competence - Does this person have the skill set for the job? There is much to be said for a willing and teachable spirit. However, if we give someone a role when they do not have the giftings or skills for it, we are setting them up for failure.

3. Chemistry - This is the ability to get along with other people. God has not created us all with the same temperaments, personalities and giftings. It is important that the team honours and utilises each other’s differences and strengths.

4. Capacity - Does this person have the time and the spiritual, emotional and physical strength to meet the demands of Men’s Ministry? The “want-to” and the “can-do” must match up.

5. Calling - It is important that the men you select have been called of God to this ministry.

•DotheyknowthatGodhascalledthemtoMen’sMinistryratherthanitsimplybeingagoodidea?

•HavetheybeenobedienttothethingsthatHehascalledthemtoandfulfilledtheircommitments in the past?

6. Contribution - Results or performance. Does the person have a track record for getting things done?

• Ask them to join your team.

No goals > completion issues

Goals deal with the practical outworking of your vision and strategies and allow you to track their achievement.

Goals are measurable, and men want and need things that are measurable:

•Menneedtoseetangibleresultsfromtheirefforts.

•Menarebuilttorespondtocleardirections.

•Menliketobeabletolookatthebalancesheetand/orbottomline.

•Menwanttoidentifythestepsrequiredontheladdertosuccess.

We need SMART goals:

Specific

Measurable

Achievable

Relevant

Timely

Goal Evaluation:

•Whenwillweachieveourgoals?

•Whenwillwecompletekeytasks?

•Whenwillweachieveourvision?

•Whenwillwereachourdestination?

I do not run like a man running aimlessly; I do not fight like a man beating the air. 1 Cor 9:26

Goals are dreams with deadlines. Diana Scharf Hunt

Resource Sheet: How to Identify LeadersforYourTeam

MEN’S SMALL GROUPS

Why are Men’s Small Groups important? Why should men be part of one?

Men’s Small Groups Are Important:1. To bring men out of isolation and build real friendships.2. To encourage and help one another. Mark 2:1-5 (the paralytic)3. Men grow spiritually - up to seven times faster.4. For men to deal with issues relevant to them.5. For evangelism - men reach men.

6. Jesus was in a group of 12 and a “small group” of 4.

Types of Groups:•Prayer/intercession •Tech/parking/securityteams•Training/shortcourses/study •Support,addictions•Opengroups (alcohol,drugs,sexual)•Fourwheeldrive(closed)groups •Divorcerecovery

•Sports/business/ministry

Purpose:1. To know Christ better – spiritual growth 2. To encourage one another – build friendships3. To help others know Christ – mission

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Start Up Strategies for Closed Groups

What:•Whatisthepurpose/goal? •Whatshouldyoudo?(resourcematerial)

Where and when:•Whereareyougoingtomeet? •Whenandforhowlong?

Who should you consider?•Existingfriendships •Sharedinterests

•Inyourlocation/area •Diverseideas/culture

Qualities and commitment:•Faithfulmen–guyswhowillturnup! •Makemeetingatoppriority•Preparedtoprayforothers •Desiretogrowspiritually

•Confidentiality •Honestyandopenness

How to invite others:•Pray.JesusprayedallnightbeforeHeselectedHisdisciples.Talk

to one man about forming a group with you.•Twomenthenprayforathirdmantojoinyourgroup.•Thenthreemenprayforafourthman.

•Makesurethereisatrialperiodforthegroupandadefinedexitpointafterthetrial.

Effective Groups

1. Keep focussed 5. Be honest 2. Start/finish on time 6. Genuine concern 3. People, not programs 7. Keep the discussion moving

4. Move slowly

Organising Men’s Small Group Ministry in Churches

Oversight Co-ordinator Responsibilities:•Contentandresourcesforgroups •Pastoralcareofleaders•Formationandevaluationofgroups •Trainingofleaders

•Administration

Continuing Education Meetings:•Leadersmeettogether3or4timeseachyear•Shareandprayforeachother•Discussproblemsencounteredintheirgroupsandanswerquestions•Teachonaleadership-relatedtopic

•Encourageandsupporteachotherasleaders

Continuing Support:•Timingforformingnewgroups •Personalinvitationculture•Keeppublicising •Initiative–encouragementoformgroups•Useexistingministryteamsasbasisfornewgroups

Resource Sheet: Men’s Small Groups Making Wise Choices

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MINISTRY WITH MEN SURVEY

Before you build a ministry to and for your men, you need to know them. The men of each church have different interests, pressures, schedules, incomes and needs. The information you gather will likely be the most valuable planning tool you have.

The Survey will give your men ownership because they get in on the ground floor. The process of surveying alerts people to the upcoming Men’s Ministry and builds anticipation. It may also help you identify more men interested in being on the organising team.

The Survey Provides You With:

1. Facts instead of impressions

2. A profile of your men

3. An essential planning tool

4. A benchmark against which you can measure progress

The Promise Keepers Survey Template

This Survey has been designed to give a range of information on bio data, interests, experience and personal devotional habits.

Promise Keepers recommends that the standard Survey be used because:

1. The questions have been carefully worded and designed.

2. The results can be analysed and benchmarked against averages from other churches and thousands of other responses.

3. Promise Keepers offers a service to collate results and provide the results in multiple graph formats.

Refer to the Ministry with Men Survey Instructions for best practice methods to get widespread participation. Please follow these instructions carefully. It is very difficult to re-survey following a failed first attempt with low participation.

It is vital to give feedback after the survey has been analysed:

•Congregation-shortsummaryofkeyresultsinahandoutsheet.

•Men’sMinistryLeaders-overviewallresultsbutfocusonareasrelatedtoplanning.Alsoworkoutthe reason for any major variations from national averages. This may be a point of difference that you need to cater for.

From Your Surveys:

1. What major themes and issues stood out?

2. Where are the men at spiritually?

3. What steps do we need to put in place to achieve our Men’s Ministry goals?

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Resource Sheets:•MinistrywithMenSurvey•MinistrywithMenSurvey

Instructions

MINISTRY WITH MEN STRATEGIC PLANNING TOOL

Promise Keepers has developed a two-page Strategic Planning Tool which gives an instant picture of where your Men’s Ministry is currently. It also provides an effective process that will propel your Men’s Ministry into the future.

Using the information gained from the Strategic Planning Tool enables your Men’s Ministry to chart a way forward that will strengthen friendships and grow your men spiritually and numerically. It enables you to see interconnections between activities so that maximum leverage can be gained to build success.

How to Get the Most Out of the Strategic Planning Tool:

Although we have found men’s needs and issues are remarkably similar everywhere, each church is different and needs a customised pathway to reach its mission of seeing men transformed by the power of God.

Promise Keepers will work through the Strategic Planning Tool with you step by step. This tool will give you a clear, consistent pathway to building an effective Ministry with Men in your church.

Each stage in the document builds upon the previous one. Working through these stages will enable you to identify potentially weak areas and allow opportunity for recommendations and advice to strengthen those areas.

Theresultsofyouractivitiesarepredictableandthepitfallsareavoidable!PromiseKeepers’guidance will mean success, not surprises.

Anything worthwhile requires commitment, perseverance and clear goals.

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Resource Sheets:•MinistrywithMenSurvey•MinistrywithMenSurvey

Instructions

Resource Sheet: Ministry with Men Strategic Planning Tool

Promise Keepers New ZealandPO Box 48123, Blockhouse Bay, Auckland 0644Phone: 09 627 0101 Email: pk@promisekeepers.org.nzWeb: www.promisekeepers.org.nz

The Growth CyclePL

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