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Master Your Mind for Success in Business and Life
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“Master Your Mind for Success in Business and Life” by Suzi Stich
Published by Suzi Stich, 2090 Dunwoody Club Drive, Ste. 106-172, Atlanta, GA. 30350
Email: [email protected]
© 2019 Suzi Stich. All rights reserved This book or parts thereof may not be reproduced in any form, stored in any retrieval system, or transmitted in any form by any means – electronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, or otherwise – without prior written permission of the published, except as provided by United States of America law. For permission requests, write to the published at “Attention: “Permissions” at the address above.
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About the author.
From a remote Outback Australian sheep and cattle farm to a full university scholarship to a Corporate Training and Development Specialist. Then to senior leadership positions in Human Resource Management in both Sydney, Australia, and the US. Suzi Stich, the Founder, and CEO of Suzi Stich, LLC is no stranger to hard work and overcoming the odds. She has recognized that what may seem insurmountable to some can be achieved through Mastering your Mind for Success. Nothing is impossible if you put your mind to it. Her dynamic, yet very personal style, gives her the ability to connect multi-generationally and inspire people to adopt her mind mastery message in their own lives to achieve joy, satisfaction and their true potential in life. As a now 10-year breast cancer survivor, she has had to seriously practice what she preaches.
Suzi is a public speaker, trainer, and Human Resource professional who has developed the “Master your Mind for Success” program. This is the transformational blueprint for bringing your emotions, thoughts and actions into alignment to pave the way for success and fulfillment in your life in your area of passion. She holds a B. Sc. In Education, a B.A. in Human Resources Development and Communication Management, and an MBA in Human Resource Management and International Business. Suzi lives in Atlanta, Georgia, with her husband and son.
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You can achieve business and personal success with a high-performance mindset.
You are not a helpless victim of your circumstances. You are a master of your own mind.
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Testimonials for Master Your Mind for Success in Business and Life. "As a business owner in Melbourne, Australia, I have had the pleasure of working with Suzi Stich. What she brought to my organization was a rare breed of real life emotional intelligence and resilience experience that was tempered with a systematic approach to how we can all develop our ability to align our emotions and thoughts, and work on overcoming disappointment and adversity. She is a role model for how strong we can be when difficulties enter our lives.” Margie Buttriss Adolescent Health Expert State Representative - Protective Behaviors Victoria Speaker, Educator, Author, Trainer
“I learned how to Master my Mind working with Suzi some years ago. She had a knack for weaving the skills into all she said and did. At the time, I had been through some challenging life experiences, and was looking to get back on my feet financially and restart my career. Suzi provided me with the skills and courage to change my thinking, and present myself in the best possible light to a prospective employer.
I started part-time as a Marketing Assistant, and after five years, I was the Director of Development Operations with The Atlanta Opera. I started a new position in July, 2019 and am now the Director of Advancement and Alumni Services at Emory University - Advancement and Alumni Engagement. Without Suzi's insight, encouragement, and mentorship, I would not have achieved the career and personal success that I enjoy today. I believe I am well on the way to being the best version of Self possible.”
Rachel Jorgensen, Director of Advancement and Alumni Services at Emory University, Atlanta, GA.
I was so fortunate to work for Suzi when I was an HR Generalist and she was my boss. She was the Director of Human Resources in a large healthcare group with multiple facilities. Her own self-awareness, self-management, social awareness and relationship management taught me a great deal. It is the entrepreneurial worlds’ gain that she is sharing her expertise and knowledge throughout the globe with her company, Suzi Stich LLC. Bryain Winfrey, Human Resources Professional, Toyo Tires, GA.
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Introduction:
First there was chaos, anxiety and doubt. Then there was calm, clarity and commitment!
You realized that you had a choice as to react to a situation, or step back, think, and respond to it. This can be
you in all areas of your life!
Imagine that you can take all of the stress and turmoil in your life and transform yourself into a self-aware and thought-driven person who strives for your goals and greatness in both business and life. You can! No more letting others push your buttons and derail you from being the best person you can be. Your potential for success and satisfaction with your life will increase dramatically once you’ve acquired the necessary skills of mind mastery. (A.K.A. Emotional Intelligence on Steroids)
Chapters 1 and 2 of this e-book will describe Personal Competence and the two subcomponents: Self-
Awareness and Self-Management. In these outlines, you’ll read about the importance of being aware of your emotions as they are happening, and how it is possible for you to manage them to favorably work for you.
Chapters 3 and 4 will detail the next area in mastering your mind. That is Social Competence and its two
subcomponents: Social Awareness and Relationship Management. Both components consider how you are being in social situations and your ability to connect and form relationships with others in life.
No matter what gender you are, we all have emotional reactions to almost everything that happens in
our lives, whether we notice them, or not. Our growingly complex society constantly presents challenges that require us to make quick decisions.
Many times, we are unsure and don’t have all of the information that allows us to feel comfortable in our decision making. The resulting emotional reactions contribute greatly to our level of stress, anxiety and
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depression. Some of the more common results of this can be lower self-esteem, low self-confidence and a lack of belief in our own ability. If left unchecked, the cumulative consequences can prove to be catastrophic. It doesn’t have to be like this though.
The specialists at Suzi Stich, LLC are equipped to guide you through the program so you can “Master
Your Mind for Success”. It will become a life-long habit once you have learned how. You can use the skills to alleviate a lot of undesirable emotional reactions you may later regret. You’ll be guided in how to make thoughtful responses, rather than automatic emotional reactions. It doesn’t require any prior training or experience - just a desire to fulfill the greatness you are capable of.
Did you know you inherited your “irrational” brain from ancient creatures who needed to act on instinct
to survive? This is also the segment of the brain that causes fast emotional reactions. Your “irrational brain” hijacks all of your thoughts with an emotional reaction before information actually gets to your rational brain.
Humans developed rational brains once they started to develop language skills. Your rational brain is responsible for complex thinking in the frontal lobe—located under the forehead. The frontal lobe controls our reasoning, planning, voluntary movement, and some aspects of speech.
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Chapter 1 – What is the key to mastering your mind for success?
Your mind is your instrument and you can learn to master it like a maestro!
To master your mind with skill, you need to be proficient in emotional intelligence (EI). The next four chapters will provide insight into ways of understanding and recognizing the four components that make up EI. Without it, we can only rely on unfiltered reactions that date back to ancient times when we had to fight for survival and go into the “flight or fight” mode to defend ourselves. We call this the “Lizard Brain” reaction. EI engages rational thought in the frontal lobe and engages what we term the “Wizard Brain.”
Think about the multitude of situations where people made rash decisions in the heat of the moment -
and lived to regret them, sometimes finding themselves within the justice system and/or isolated from those they love. It is our irrational brain (Lizard Brain) that instinctively takes action without any thought of consequences or danger.
Below are just a few examples: - Getting involved in fights at home or at school. (Wizard or Lizard?) - Resigning from a job without another job. (Wizard or Lizard?) - Saying harsh words to a friend, family member or partner. (Wizard or Lizard?) - Being verbally or physically abusive to people. (Wizard or Lizard?) - Treating a person badly and without respect. (Wizard or Lizard?) - Disregarding people. (Wizard or Lizard?) - Not giving people a chance to speak and interrupting them. (Wizard or Lizard?)
The list could go on forever. Once we start this spiral, the situations we encounter start to explode further because of the way we are, not the way the rest of the world is. It’s our choice to respond in this manner. This way of being changes our behavior completely. As they say, “treat people how you would like to be treated.”
Unfortunately, without the skills of EI, people lose sight of what makes them truly happy, what motivates them, what they do well, what satisfies them and what pushes their buttons. All of their emotions condense down to varying degrees of being happy, sad, angry, afraid or ashamed. Often it is the latter four that start to control their way of being!
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If someone is very angry, they aren’t going to take time to think about the consequences for themselves
and others. It’s the same if they’re afraid, sad, ashamed, furious, worthless, disgraced, dejected, hopeless, or petrified. To relieve the emotional distress they are experiencing, some travel down a path that is detrimental or even lethal to themselves. There are ways to circumvent these feelings when they initially arise in your mind.
We want to provide you with the opportunity to prioritize learning EI skills and change your life. You’ll be
able to minimize stress, anxiety, depression and the constant see-saw of emotions with these skills in your tool kit. You’ll also reignite your passion, goals and aspirations for greatness in your life.
To achieve your greatness in life, we guide you in how to be persistent, positive and patient in pursuit of your passions.
(Disclaimer: People who’ve been diagnosed with a psychological illness will learn something in this program; however, it’s not a substitute for psychological treatment.)
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Chapter 2 – Personal Competence - “Knowing Yourself is the Beginning of Wisdom.” This saying was first spoken by Aristotle, the ancient Greek philosopher and scientist. His words are totally
relevant today. So much so that the first core skill of Mastering your Mind for Success is Self-Awareness. The diagram below outlines four core skills of Emotional Intelligence (Mastering your Mind for Success) They will be reviewed in the sequence outlined so you can refer back to them and see how they
complement each other and transform your mindset from good to great.
Personal Competence and the two key concepts: For you to achieve greatness and develop resilience, you need to understand who you are, why you do what you do, how you go about doing it, and the impact it has on other people. We start this process by delving into the first cornerstone of Mastering our Mind for Success – Personal Competence.
Personal Competence is all about “You” and how well you recognize your emotions, moods and drives, and then how well you’re able to manage them. It’s broken down into Self-Awareness and Self-Management. Let us explore these.
“By becoming self-aware, you gain ownership of reality; in becoming real, you become the master of both inner and outer life”.
Deepak Chopra
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● Component 1 of Personal Competence: Self- Awareness
Self-Awareness is how well you know yourself. It gives you great insight into areas of your emotions and behavior that you may be blind to. People with high self-awareness are honest with themselves and those around them. They are not overly critical or unrealistically hopeful. To be self-aware, it is important to think honestly about our strengths, weaknesses, motivations, values, and goals. We have to use these as our filters when we’re responding to those around us. With astute awareness, it’s very possible to manage our emotions and behaviors, so they greatly contribute to our efforts for all types of success, and to be our best “Self”.
Building self-awareness is possible for anyone. There are some guided questions we use in “Mastering Your Mind for Success” training that provide you with a pathway to increasing your self-awareness. By developing self- awareness, you’re giving yourself the gift of choosing a path or new opportunity that plays to your real strengths, skill set, and preferences.
After building your self-awareness, you’ll see yourself in a new light and with new ability in the areas of self-confidence, a realistic self-assessment and a self-deprecating sense of humor.
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Component 2 of Personal Competence: Self-Management
Self-Management is your ability to regulate emotions, thoughts and behaviors effectively in different situations. This includes managing stress, controlling impulses, self-motivation and working hard on personal and work goals. It also refers to suspending our judgement and thinking before acting, in addition to our ability to control disruptive outbursts or bad moods.
Some of the skills of self-management include managing our stress, managing our time, having clear,
calm communications with others, problem solving, self-control, being open to innovation, and being adaptable, to name a few.
I know, it sounds too good to be true. Realistically it isn’t though. If you become more self-aware, you
can use your new skills of your own emotional awareness to stay flexible and direct your behavior positively. Again, it’s something that can be learned, and is part of the “Master Your Mind for Success” process.
Recall someone you know who is always patient, understanding, listens well, and deals with difficult
situations with knowledge and wisdom. They do this with a calm demeanor. What they are doing is exercising their self-management competence. People love to be around these people because they appear to have it all together. We also find that people like this usually succeed in most of their endeavors because they don’t succumb to anger, fear and shame when situations become challenging. We are all capable of being like this.
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Chapter 3 – Practical ways to practice Personal Competence in your life.
Developing and practicing Self-Awareness and Self-Management are directly related to our EI and
success. We aren’t out to uncover dark secrets about you, but instead understand who you are, why you do what you do, how you do it, and the impact it has on other people. Self-Management development and practice help us regulate our emotional responses so we respond in a way that will lead to a positive outcome for us and others involved in the situation.
We know our biological impulses drive our emotions and without self-management, we are allowing our
“flight or fight” primitive “Lizard Brain” to have the upper hand, rather than rational thought. By learning to manage our emotional responses to challenges and situations, we are putting ourselves in the “driver’s seat” to master our minds, and thus embark upon our journey towards resilience. With self-management skills, we will also have the ability to control or redirect any disruptive outbursts and negative moods.
This list is not exhaustive so in our “Master Your Mind for Success” training, we take a deeper dive into the
topic in our “Master Your Mind for Success” training:
Ways to practice self-awareness. 1. Believe in yourself. 2. Try to be frank and realistic in your communication. Avoid apologizing and being effusive in conversations. 3. Focus on your strengths and view your weaknesses as “areas for development.” Ways to practice self-management. 1. Be self-aware. The first person you need to lead and manage is yourself!
2. Be accountable for yourself.
3. Plan and organize yourself.
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Chapter 4 – Social Competence: “Listen and observe to know what others are thinking.”
Now that we’ve explained the concepts of Self-Awareness and Self- Management as they relate to your degree of Personal Competence under the umbrella of EI, we are going to take a step further and outline what it means to be Socially Competent. In this analysis, we’ll consider the two key components that make up Social Competence, Social Awareness and Relationship Management.
Social Awareness is the ability to take the perspective of and empathize with others from different backgrounds and cultures. It is a critical foundation skill for successful and fulfilling social interactions at home, at work, and in teams.
For us to be socially aware, we need to show our ability to effectively understand and respond to the needs of others.
A classic example is a waiter at a nice restaurant who suggests something to your taste when you
inquire about a particular dish. Another example is the doctor or nurse who goes that extra mile and not only provides you with the medical treatment that you need, but also comes back and checks at intervals for the next 2-4 hours to see how you’re doing. That kind stranger who stops on the side of the road to help you change a flat tire, or a nice neighbor who drops over with a casserole after you’re home from hospital stay.
Those who exhibit outstanding social awareness show empathy, understand the politics and nuances in
a social or work situation, and are of service to others. Scientific American reported that our degree of empathy has declined during last 30 years due to an
increase in social isolation. The use of digital communications, social media, video conferencing and other forms of gaming and electronic media make it easier for people to say things they wouldn’t say to another person’s face. There is no longer a need for people to engage with each other and be civil. They can “unfriend” people on Facebook without the other person even knowing.
We’ve also had a dramatic increase in the number of cases of cyber bullying amongst our 10-16 year olds. Some victims take their own lives. There is a void of empathy and this impacts our understanding of others
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and their point of view. Ultimately, this leads to a complete lack of trust in those who’ve chosen to treat others badly.
Understanding other people's feelings is central to EI. Showing empathy, understanding of others and that can be trusted is first and foremost for any successful business or personal relationship. Get it wrong and you'll be seen as uncaring and insensitive.
“Seek first to understand, then to be understood”. (Stephen Covey)
Getting Social Awareness right is essential for success. You have to be able to spot and understand peoples’ emotions while you are right there in the thick of it. You can do it!
Ways to practice Social Awareness 1. Seek to understand others and their ideas before you speak. 2. Show you are genuinely listening by using active listening skills. 3. Show you care about them and what they are saying. 4. Turn your phone to silent when you are talking to people. Interruptions in communication via other people or other forms of communication show a disregard for the value of this person’s message to you. 5. Be non-judgmental at all times. Relationship Management refers to how we use awareness of our emotions, and pick up on the nuances and politics in emotions of those around us, to have effective social interactions. The same term is used in business to typically refer to the supervision and maintenance of relationships between a company and its external partners, especially clients.
Here’s an illustration that forms the basis for all business Customer Relationship Management Systems that value the relationships they have with clients, vendors and other groups that contribute to business success. This graphic also has great application in our personal lives. We could replace the “Customer Relationship” cloud with “Personal Relationships” and surround it with family, friends, colleagues, teammates, and others we spend quality time with. All healthy relationships require ongoing:
- Trust
- Reliability
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- Support - Loyalty - Being of service to each other - Quality interactions - All people aiming to do their best. - Clear and honest communication (this applies to marketing for businesses)
Ways to practice Relationship Management: 1. Develop trust – This is the basis of every good relationship. When you trust your family, team and colleagues, you form a powerful bond that helps you to work and communicate with them more effectively. 2. Be mutually respectful – When you respect the people you associate or work with, you value their input and ideas, and they value yours. 3. Show mindfulness towards others – This means taking responsibility for your words and actions. Those who are mindful are careful and attend to what they say, and they don't let their own negative emotions impact the people around them. 4. Welcome diversity – People with good relationships not only accept diverse people and opinions, but they welcome them. For instance, when your friends and colleagues offer different opinions from yours, take the time to consider what they have to say, and factor their insights into your decision-making.
5. Practice open communication – We communicate all day, whether we're sending emails and using social media, or meeting face to face. The better and more effectively you communicate with those around you, the richer your relationships will be. All good relationships depend on open, honest communication.
Self-Awareness, Self-Management, Social Awareness and Relationship Management form the family tree of
Mastering your Mind for Success in Business and Life.
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Chapter 5 – Putting it All Together.
So far you’ve learned how to build your EI by enhancing your skills in these key areas: Personal Competence
- Self-Awareness - Self-Management
Social Competence - Social Awareness - Relationship Management
It is time now to apply what you have learned to your life. Here are some steps you can take. • Do a self-evaluation. What are your strengths and weaknesses? Are you willing to accept that you're not
perfect and that you could work on some areas to develop into the best version of yourself possible? Have the courage to look at yourself honestly – it can change your life.
● Examine how you react to stressful situations. The ability to stay calm and in control in difficult situations is highly valued – in the business world and outside it. Keep your emotions under control when things go wrong. This will go a long way towards achieving greatness.
● Observe how you react to people. Do you rush to judgment before you know all of the facts? Do you stereotype? Look honestly at how you think and interact with other people. “Try and walk a mile in their shoes”, and be more open and accepting of their perspectives and needs. You may learn something valuable too.
● Look at your social environment. Do you seek attention for your accomplishments? Humility can be a wonderful quality, and it doesn't mean that you're shy or lack self-confidence. When you practice humility, you say that you know what you did, and you can be quietly confident about it. Give others a chance to shine – put the focus on them, and don't worry too much about getting praise for yourself. “Give and you will receive”!
Please go to our website www.suzistich.com to find out more. There is a link where you can organize a 15- minute Discovery call to find out. You can also complete the Contact Sheet on the website and we’ll contact you about your particular program needs. For further information and speaking events, coaching or counseling, contact us directly at [email protected]
