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BreakingConventionStudentEssay2019Knowlesi
MakingsenseofayahuascaexperiencesofthoseintheUK
Aninterpretativephenomenologicalanalysis
ByAdamKnowles
BreakingConventionStudentEssay2019Knowlesi
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AbstractAyahuasca,anAmazonianplant-medicinebrew,isincreasinglypopularintheUKwith
seekersofpsychological,emotional,biologicalandspiritualhealing.Ithinkpsychotherapists
well-placedtoamplify,questionandworkwithayahuascaexperiences.Iexplorewhatfour
peopleintheUKmakeoftheirayahuascaexperiencesusingpurposivesamplingtofocuson
smallgroupsusingayahuascaforhealinginritualsettings.Witheachparticipant,Iconducta
45-to60-minutesemi-structuredinterviewwiththequestion,‘Whatdidyoumakeofyour
past,personalexperienceswithayahuasca?’thenuseinterpretativephenomenological(IPA)
analysis.IPAemphasisespersonal,directexperienceovertheorising.Igroupthefindings
intofivethemesformedfromparticipants’responses:‘1.Ourtelephonelinebacktosource:
insight/changes’;‘2.Threeguyswithfeathers:interculturalexchange’;‘3.Watchloadsof
ballet:differentpathsofhealing;‘4.Getsyouoffyourhead:adrug?’;and‘5.Iendedupin
myfather'spsyche:perspective’.Participantscredittheirayahuascaexperiencesasbeing
importantfornewinsightsthathelpthemmakesubstantialimprovementsintheirlife.The
difficultymakingsenseoftheinternationalandinterculturalaspectsofayahuasca
permeatestheparticipants’commentary.Participantsregretthebarrierstohealingcreated
byillegalityandIoutlinetheproblematicbasisoftheillegalityofayahuascaintheUK.
Participantsconsiderotherthingsalongsideorinsteadofayahuascaasessentialtotheir
well-beingincludingintegrationworkafterceremony,psychotherapy,meditation,
shamanism,andyoga.WrittenbyaUK-basedexistentialpsychotherapistwithaqualitative,
phenomenologicalapproach,thisresearchmakesafreshanddistinctcontributionto
existingdiscourses.Thefindingsandargumentsarerelevanttopsychotherapy,philosophy,
psychiatry,politics,pharmacology,medicine,socialscienceandanthropology.
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ContentsAbstract.............................................................................................................................i
Contents............................................................................................................................ii
Introduction......................................................................................................................1
Literaturereview...............................................................................................................3
Anayahuascaprimer............................................................................................................3
Healingandtherapeuticpotential........................................................................................3
Safety....................................................................................................................................4
Legality.................................................................................................................................5
Theneedforfurtherempiricalresearch..............................................................................5
Methodology.....................................................................................................................7
Method.................................................................................................................................8
Tableofparticipantdemographics.......................................................................................8
Datacollection......................................................................................................................8
Dataanalysis.........................................................................................................................9
Rigour,validity&transparency............................................................................................9
Findings...........................................................................................................................10
Tableofcodingsperparticipant/theme.............................................................................10
1.Ourtelephonelinebacktosource:insight/changes......................................................11
2.Threeguyswithfeathers:interculturalexchange..........................................................12
3.Watchloadsofballet:differentpathsofhealing...........................................................13
4.Getsyouoffyourhead:adrug?.....................................................................................14
5.Iendedupinmyfather'spsyche:perspective...............................................................15
Discussion.......................................................................................................................16
Relevancetoandimplicationsforpractice........................................................................17
Limitations..........................................................................................................................18
Futureresearchanddevelopment.....................................................................................19
Reflectionasaresearcher..................................................................................................19
Conclusion.......................................................................................................................20
References......................................................................................................................21
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IntroductionAyahuascaisaplant-medicinebrewimportanttoindigenouscommunitiesoftheAmazon,
uniqueinitsculture,historyandeffect(Shanon,2010,p.141).ThoseintheUKseeking
psychological,emotional,biologicalandspiritualhealingareincreasinglyattractedto
psychedelicceremonies(Sessaetal.,2017).IbelieveUKpsychotherapistsarewell-placedto
offerpreparationandintegrationservicesthatareessentialtosafeandeffectiveuseof
psychedelics.
ItwassoonaftermyinitialexperienceswithayahuascathatIstartedtrainingasan
existentialpsychotherapist.Fiveyearson,Iwanttoknowhowayahuascahasaffectedthe
livesofothersintheUKandhowpsychotherapistsmightbestsupportayahuascaasapath
toinsightandhealing.
Researchintothetherapeuticpotentialofpsychedelicsisresurgingfollowingahiatusgoing
backtothe1960s.UKresearchbytalkingtherapistsonthelonger-termapplicationsof
ayahuascaremainsrare,withevenlessfromanexistentialmindset.WrittenbyaUK-based
existentialpsychotherapistwithaqualitative,phenomenologicalapproach,thisresearch
makesafreshanddistinctcontributiontoexistingdiscourses.
Usinginterpretativephenomenologicalanalysis(IPA),Iinvestigatedwhatfourpeopleinthe
UKthinkabouttheirpast,personalayahuascaexperiences.Iconductedsemi-structured
confidentialandindividualinterviewsof45-60minutes.Ifollowedthiswithtranscriptionof
theinterviews,thematiccodingandasubsequentwrite-up.Myprojecttooksixmonths
withinthesecondhalfof2018.
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Ihaveonlywordstorepresentpsychedelicexperiencesthatcanbenuminous,expansive
andineffable.IopposeboththeimpersonalstyleprizedbyscienceandtheKafkaesque
prosetypicalofsomephilosophers.IwriteaspersonallyandclearlyasIcan.
Myexistentialoutlookemphasisestheintersubjectivenatureofthehumanexperienceand
owningone’sthoughts.Iuse‘I’and‘you’inthisessaytoreferrespectivelytomyselfasthe
writerandyouasthereader.
Let’stakeatrip.
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LiteraturereviewAnayahuascaprimer
Asabrew,ayahuascaisadecoctionoftheayahuascavineBanisteriopsiscaapi(Spruceex
Griseb.)C.V.MortonandtheleavesofthechacrunabushPsychotriaviridisRuiz&Pav.The
crushedayahuascavineandchacrunaleavesworktogether(Nutt,citedinCocozza,2014)to
produceeffectsincluding4-6hoursoftrance,euphoria,connectionandinsightsinto
problemsofliving,alongsidevomiting(ICEERS,2017,p.8)andfrequenttripstothetoilet.
Visualandauditoryeffects,symbols,imageryarecommon.Shanon(2010)providesa
compellingcartographyoftheseexperiences.
Healingandtherapeuticpotential
Arangeofliteraturedescribehealingandtherapeuticassociationswithayahuasca(ICEERS,
2017;Shanon,2010;Tafur,2017;Blainey,2015;Ryan,2015)andtheUK-basedBeckley
Foundationfindsencouragingresults(Morales-Garciaetal.,2017).Snider’squalitative
researchaddressesayahuascaandpsychotherapyinaNorthAmericancontext(Snider,
2016;Snider,2017)asdoesHarris(2017).
ThepertinentaspectthatemergesfromthesesourcesistheclashbetweenWestern
notions/mechanicsofhealingandotherdiscourses.Metzneridentifies‘profound
differencesintheunderlyingworldviewandconceptionsofreality’(Metzner,1998,
abstract).Providinganexample,Pollan(2018)theorisespsychedelicexperiencesvia
pharmacological,psychiatricandneuroscientificlenses.Ithinkweneedwiderglobal
perspectivesandamultidisciplinaryapproach.
Tupper(2009)takesadifferenttacktoscientisticliterature,speakingof‘entheogenic
healing’,where‘entheogen’meanstoentrainexperiencesofgod(s).Dev(2018)goesfurther
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toproposethatayahuascapossessesit/him/herselfaconsciousnessthatdeservesdirect
research,coiningthisidea‘interspecieslistening’(Dev,2018,title).Luke(2011)describes
‘discarnateentities’(Luke,2011,title).TheseconceptionsofLukeandDevstandapartfrom
WesternscientificmodelsandopenthewaytounderstandingsIbelievewillhelp
psychotherapistswithourclients.
ManyhavemadesubstantialattemptstosquaredifferencesbetweenWestern
science/medicineandothermodalities(Grof,2000;LabateandCavnar,2018b;Judith,2011;
Mackinnon,2012;Luke,2015;Tafur,2017;Miller,2017;LiesterandPrickett,2012).I
concludethatpsilocybinfordepression(PsychedelicResearchGroup,2019)orayahuasca
forwell-beingisnotthesameasinsulinfordiabetesoribuprofenforaheadache.Schmid
(2011,p.246)suggeststhatayahuascaisbetterthoughtofasapsychologicalcatalystthana
pharmacologicallyactivesubstance,whichmakessensetome.
ThedifferencebetweentheWesternmedicalmodelandotherhealingmodalities
constitutes‘averyfundamentaldifferencewithagoodmanyimplications’(Rogers,1976,
citedinSandersandHill,2014,p.60).Ibelieveexistentialism(vanDeurzen,2014;
Kaufmann,1960)helpfultoaddressthisdifferencesinceitaddressesontologicaland
epistemologicalconcerns.
Safety
Ayahuascaisoneofthemostpowerfulpsychoactivesubstancesknowntohumankind,butis
safewhenproperprotocolsarefollowed(ICEERS,2017;dosSantos,2013;Barbosaetal.,
2012;Johnson,RichardsandGriffiths,2008;Doering-Silveiraetal.,2005).Zinberg(1986)
explainsthevitalimportance,beyond‘substance’,ofthemindsetwithwhichpeople
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approachayahuasca,thecontextandcircumstancesoftheritual,andtheskillofthosein
theroleoffacilitators.
Ifoundnoliteraturelinkingayahuascato‘HallucinogenPersistingPerceptionDisorder’
(HPPD)(AmericanPsychiatricAssociation,2013;WorldHealthOrganization,2018)andthink
spiritualperspectivesofferalternativestopsychiatricnosologies.Whatpsychiatrists
describeasapsychoticbreakothersdescribeasaspiritualemergency(Megler,2017).
ExistentiallyImightconsiderthesamephenomenaanontologicalchallenge.
ICEERSconcludethatayahuascahasan‘acceptablephysiologicalandpsychologicalsafety
profileandwiththerapeuticpotential’(ICEERS,2017,p.10).
Legality
Whilelegalinothercountries,theUKgovernmentwebsitestatesitisillegaltotake,carry,
makeorsellpsychoactivesubstances,thenexcludesalcohol,nicotineandcaffeinefromits
definitionof‘psychoactive’(Gov.uk,2015).Itisfarfromanevidence-basedpolicy.
Szasz(1992)makesacomprehensiveandpersuasiveargumentagainsttheUKposition.My
viewalignswithSzasz’sthatgovernmentsshouldlistenmoretoscientists,andscientists
shouldallowotherstomakeuptheirownminds.
Whatevermydisagreements,Iworkwithinthelawasaprofessionalandaresearcher.
Theneedforfurtherempiricalresearch
Therehasinrecentyearsbeen‘anexplosionofhigh-qualityscientificresearchinto
ayahuasca’(Gearin,2017).Whilethisexplosioniswelcome,researchrelevanttotheUKand
fromanexistentialpsychotherapeuticperspectiveremainsrare.
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Anexistentialapproachmeansopennesstoapluralityofwaysknowing.Nosingle
perspectivecomprisesthetruthandafullunderstandingliesforeverbeyondourreach.
Furtherempiricalresearchcouldnotjustdeepenourunderstandingwithinexisting
paradigmsbutbroadenitusingahumbleandinterdisciplinarymindset.ThisiswhatIoffer
here,andIencouragemoreresearchalongthoselines.
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MethodologyAftersomeinitialreading(Silverman,2017;WilligandStainton-Rogers,2013;Braunand
Clarke,2013;Waddell,2007),Iconcludedthatquantitativemethodsthatreducerich
phenomenatonumbersviastatisticalanalysesareunsuitableformyquestion.
GivenNietzsche’sideathat‘truthisdivine’(Nietzsche,1974,p.283,§344),Iconsideredthe
transpersonalresearchmethods(Anderson,2015;AndersonandBraud,2011;Braudand
Anderson,1998;Romanyshyn,2013).Isoughtamethodologythatcoulddojusticetothe
extraordinaryexperiencesofayahuascaandperhapsincorporatethepersonal
transformationoftheresearcherasdata(Anderson,2015,p.164).
Afterconsideringmethodologiesincludingnarrativeinquiry,actionresearch,grounded
theory(Thomson,2011),heuristicinquiry(Hiles,2001),andFoucauldianDiscourseAnalysis,
IsettledonInterpretativePhenomenologicalAnalysis(IPA).
Phenomenologymeanssuspendingpastconceptionsandreductionistmodelstoget‘back
tothethingsthemselves’(Husserl,2001,p.168).Assuch,Iavoidpsychoanalytic,humanistic
andeventranspersonalpsychotherapeutictheoryheretosupportphenomenological
epoché.Iwantto‘makethescientificthemesecurebyworkingoutthesefore-structuresin
termsofthethingsthemselves’(Heidegger,2016,p.195).Itrytostayclosetomy
participants’words,meaningandinterpretationsratherthangeneralise,theoriseand
reduce.Thisistheexistentialapproachinaction.
IchoseIPAbecauseIhavesomerelevantexperienceofphenomenology,becauseitiswell-
describedifdifficulttomaster,becauseitisrespectedbymyschoolwithinRegent’s
UniversityLondon,andbecauseitencouragesresearcherreflexivity.Iremainmindfulof
scholarlycriticismofIPA.InitsopennessIPArisksbeingambiguousandunderspecified
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(Tuffour,2017,p.4),hasabiastowardeloquentspeakers,andislimitedtoparticipants’
perspectives(Giorgi,2011;Paley,2017;Pringleetal.,2011).
Method
Mypurposivesamplingsoughtfourparticipantsthatmeteligibilitycriteriadesignedto
enablesafeandeffectiveresearch.Irecruitedfrompersonalandprofessionalnetworks,
rulingoutanyonethatalreadyknewme.Aheadoftheinterview,Iinformedparticipantsof
mycommitmenttoconfidentialitybutalsotherisksoftakingpart,includingthatof
incriminatingthemselves(Finch,2001,p.41).
Tableofparticipantdemographics
Signifier Gender Age Nationality Occupation #of
ceremonies
P1 Male 42 British Bodyworker 2
P2 Male 53 British Entertainment [blank]
P3 Female 38 British Entrepreneur [blank]
P4 Female 63 British Semi-retired 25+
Datacollection
Isetupaface-to-faceinterview(Smith,FlowersandLarkin,2012,p.57)witheach
participantlasting45–60minutesthentranscribedandtimecodedtheaudiousingthe
F4Transkriptsoftware.Theresultingtranscriptstotalapproximately40,000words.
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Dataanalysis
IcodedmytranscriptsusingtheF4Analysesoftwareandgroupedmycodesintofivethemes
usingabstraction,subsuming,polarisation,contextualisation,numeration(sic)andfunction
(Smith,FlowersandLarkin,2012,pp.96-99).Toroottheanalysisinwhatmyparticipants
sayIquotetheirwordsinthethemetitles(Pringleetal.,2011,p.21).
Rigour,validity&transparency
Itisimportantnottoassessthevalidityofthisqualitativestudybycriteriameantfor
quantitativestudiessuchastheresearchbeinggeneralisable,repeatable,scalableor
externallyverifiable.Yardleyprovidesmoreappropriatecriteriaofquality(citedinSmith,
FlowersandLarkin,2012,pp.179-185).Ithinkmystudyisappropriatelyrigorous,validand
transparent.
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FindingsTableofcodingsperparticipant/theme
Theme P1 P2 P3 P4 Theme
totals
1.Ourtelephonelinebacktosource:
insight/changes
13 38 32 48 131
2.Threeguyswithfeathers:intercultural
exchange
67 31 18 18 134
3.Watchloadsofballet:differentpaths
ofhealing
19 12 15 30 76
4.Getsyouoffyourhead:adrug? 14 36 7 16 73
5.Iendedupinmyfather'spsyche:
perspective
4 17 14 17 52
Participanttotals 117 134 86 129 466
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1.Ourtelephonelinebacktosource:insight/changes
Thisthemereferstoexpressionsthattheexperienceofayahuascaleadstoinsights,manyof
whichprovokedsignificantimprovementsinparticipants’lives.Participantsgenerallyspeak
ofthepositiveimpactofayahuasca.
Providingthethemetitle,P4says:
allofthesethings,they'reourtools.Ourtelephonelinebacktosource
(P4,Paragraph25)
P1isreluctanttocreditayahuascawithsubstantialchanges.P2ismoregenerous:
Ifyoudoitcorrectly,thiscansaveyourlife(P2,Paragraph100)
P2saysayahuascahelpedhimmovepastalifelongaddictiontorecreationaldrugs.
P4agreeswithP3that:
I'drathergothroughthetoughest,horriblest,ceremonythanhavethe
rainbowsandunicorns(P4,Paragraph65)
ShamanicexperiencesledP4tochangeherlifefromonefocusedonherselftoonemore
aboutothers.
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2.Threeguyswithfeathers:interculturalexchange
Passagesunderthisthemecentreoninterculturalaspects,positiveandnegative.
P2,providingthewordstothetheme,enjoystherootingofritualinculturalhistory:
Whenthere'sthreeguyswithfeathers.Andyoujust,I'mlike,'wellthis
was<year>,actually,I'mwatchingthousandsofyearsofceremony(P2,
Paragraph148)
P1,bycontrast,reportshisexperienceofvisitinganAmazon-basedayahuascaresort:
everythingislikeaneco-resort,andit'sverynice.Butyoujustseeallof
theworkandallofthepeopleinvolved,allofthelocals,practically
enslavedforthebenefitofmyexperience.Itjustdidn'tfeelright(P1,
Paragraph201)
P1andP3founddifferencesincultureproblematicwhileP2andP4embracedthe
differenceanddiversityinfavourableterms.
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3.Watchloadsofballet:differentpathsofhealing
Participantsarekeentostressthatayahuascawasnecessarybutnotsufficientforthe
changestheymade.P1begins:
therearejustdifferentpaths(P1,Paragraph38)
P2muses:
youmightwatchloadsofballet;youmightgorunningonthebeach.
Anythingthathelpsyoubecomeconsciousofyourself.(P2,Paragraph184)
ForP3ayahuascaoffersadvantagesoverthemanyotherpathsofhealing.UnlikeP3,P4
thinkspsychotherapyandpsychedelicsgowelltogether:
[Idid]cognitivebehaviouraltherapy.Ididthatalongsidemicrodosing
mushrooms.(P4,Paragraph149)
P4didnotrevealthistothepsychotherapistatthetime.
P1thinksnon-ayahuascahealingismoreimportant,P2creditsayahuascaasaunique
componenttohealing,P3dismissespsychotherapyandP4thinksa50/50mixofayahuasca
withotherpathsofhealingworksbest.
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4.Getsyouoffyourhead:adrug?
Participantsoftencommentonthe'drugginess'orotherwiseofayahuasca.
P1struggleswithayahuascabeingadruggivenhisviewthatdrugsareharmful.
P2struggledwithlife-threateningdrugaddictionsfordecades.Theideaofayahuascaasa
drugstoppedP2tryingitforyears:
whenIsatdownwiththelady,shesaid‘Look,it'samedicine.Wecallit
medicineforareason’.AndthatdayIwaslike‘Rarraritdoesn't,getsyou
offyourhead,it'sadrugrarrar.’(P2,Paragraph54)
P4asP2preferstheterm‘medicine’to‘drug’,differentiatingitfrommanufactured
substancesandexplainingthatayahuascaismoreoftendifficultthanfun:
Ayahuascaisamedicine.It'ssomethingthatweusetohealourselves.It's
notsomethingthatpeoplecanusetogethighbecauseittastesso
horrible.(P4,Paragraph25)
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5.Iendedupinmyfather'spsyche:perspective
Iconsiderperspectiveayahuasca’smechanismofactionforhealing.P3leadswithher
startlingrevelation:
Iendedupinmyfather'spsychewhenhewasfive…basicallyhismother
disappeared…buttheydidn'ttellhimwhathadhappened(P3,Paragraph
341)
P3couldnotmakepeacewithherfatherviatherapyorre-birthing,butthisayahuasca
experiencehelped.
P1notes:
it'sjustmovingbeyondyourrange,andifyoucanget360…adifferent
vista.(P1,Paragraph297)
P2talksofrealisingasenseofsmallnessthathelpshimrecognisethathislifeismore
manageablethanhethought.P2andP3speakaboutayahuascaofferinginsightsabouttheir
fathersfromtakinguptheirperspective.P3characterisesayahuascaasaconsciousplant.
ForP4,ayahuascaisa(female)bestfriendwhoisn’tafraidtotellyouthetruth.Perhapsthe
perfecttherapist.
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DiscussionMyfirsttheme,thatinsightsfromayahuascaceremonieshelppeoplemakeimprovements
intheirlives,alignswiththeexistingliteratureandpopularnarratives(ICEERS,2017;Luke,
2015;Miller,2017;Tupper,2009;Tuffour,2017;Frecska,BokorandWinkelman,2016).P2’s
ideathatayahuascahelpedhislongstandingdrugaddictionfindssupportin(Liesterand
Prickett,2012),amongstothers.
Participantsofteninterpretayahuascaasadistinct,separateconsciousness,relevantto
(Dev,2018;Luke,2011).P4toldmethatayahuascawroteamanifestoofitsown,
channelledviaahuman(Ayahuascamanifesto,2011).
Myparticipantsdescribeddifficultceremoniesas‘terrifying’(P2),‘dark’(P3),and‘weird’
(P4).TheirandmyresponseconcurswithICEERSthata‘badtrip’ispoorlynamedandcan
havedistinctpsychotherapeuticoutcomes(MultidisciplinaryAssociationforPsychedelic
Studies,2017,p.42).
Still,psychedelicterrorisnotsomethingmanywishforevenif,forsome,itisworthit.
ICEERS(2017)supportproperscreeningandpreparationasdoothers,e.g.Lewis(2008,
abstract)andIconcur.
Regarding‘threeguyswithfeathers’,the‘urbanshamanism’ofmodernayahuasca
ceremoniesisacuriousculturalcombination(LabateandCavnar,2014;James,2015;Pollan,
2018;Tafur,2017).Thereisamomentwhenculturalexchangebecomescultural
appropriation(LabateandCavnar,2018a,title).Trichterprovidesanaccuratesummaryof
‘thebenefitsandrisksofaspreadingtradition’(Trichter,2010,p.131).Westernersneedto
bealerttodomineeringorcolonisingaspectsoftheirculture.ThisiswhatIthinkNietzsche
(2013)meansbyovercomingourselves.
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Oneimportantcomponentof‘watchloadsofballet’concernstheneedforintegrationpost-
ceremony.Itisdifficulttotransportinsightsacrosstheboundarybetweenayahuascaand
non-ayahuascaaswithtryingtorecalldreamsonceawake.Ittakesdetermination,skilland
effort.ItiswiththisintegrationIbelievepsychotherapistscanhelp.
Ayahuascaaimstoreachcertainstatesofmind,bodyandsoul.Thereareotherroutesto
somewhatsimilarstates.Grof(2000,p.189)usedbreathingtechniquesandJung(2009,p.
9)activeimagination.Therapistswithsuchexperiencearerelevanttothistopicdespitenot
usingthespecificvehicleofpsychedelics.Perhapstherearedifferentwaysupthemountain
fromwheretheviewissimilar.Ayahuasca-specificexperienceandknowledgeremains
important.
Relevancetoandimplicationsforpractice
Psychedelicmeansmind-manifesting(OxfordDictionaries,2017)andGrof(2016,p.45)
considerspsychedelicstobediagnosticinstrumentslikethemicroscopeformedicineorthe
telescopeforastronomy.
Icarriedoutthisresearchasapractisingpsychotherapistand,‘thebesttherapistisalways
awareofthetranspersonal,thoughnotnecessarilypractisinginthatmodemuchofthe
time’(Rowan,2016,p.69).
Relatedtothemefive,psychotherapyofteninvolvestheclientgaininggreateranddifferent
perspectives.Inmywork,Ihelpclientstoclarifygoodandbad,trueandfalse,realand
unreal,theirsandothers,importantandincidental(R.D.Laingcitedin,Heaton,2015,p.57).
Ithinkpsychotherapistswell-placedtoamplify,questionandworkwiththenew
perspectivesmadeavailablebyayahuascaexperiences.IntheUS,boththeMultidisciplinary
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AssociationforPsychedelicStudies(2018)andCIIS(2019)nowofferpostgraduatetrainingin
psychedelictherapy.
MyreadingandinteractionswithparticipantsleadmetoagreewithCarhart-Harriswho
encouragesprofessionalstoattendtothecontextinwhichmedicationsaregivenwithan
expandedmodelofmentalhealthcarethatencompassesbothpharmacologyand
psychotherapy(Carhart-HarriscitedinO'Hare,2017).
Allparticipantsspokeofthehealingbenefitsofayahuasca,thebarriersofillegalityandthe
needforlong-termintegrationandsupport.Formany,friends,family,booksand
conferencesmayprovideenough.ForothersintheUK,Ibelievethatqualified
psychotherapistsarebetterplacedtoofferserious,committed,long-termsupportthan
shamans,scientists,doctors,psychiatrists,nursesorundergroundtherapists.
PsychotherapistscandothisbetteriftheUKmakespsychedelicslegal,atleastforclinical
purposes,somethingsupportedbytheevidence.
Limitations
BeyondthelimitationsimplicitinIPAidentifiedearlier,thisresearchisastudyofonlyfour
participantsconductedbyafirst-timeresearcher.Idonotimplythatalargerstudywould
necessarilybebetter,justdifferent.
IthinkthereisscopeforepistemologicalchallengesmoresignificantthanIofferhere.Dev
(2018)encouragesmetoaskhowthefindingswouldchangehadImadeoneofthefindings
central;thatayahuascacanbetreatedasaseparateconsciousness.Thesemore
transpersonalapproachestoresearchareenticing,butIfeelnotyetqualifiedtoconduct
this.Ihopethisstudypavestheway.
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Futureresearchanddevelopment
Iwouldliketoseemorequalitative,phenomenologicalandtalkingtherapy-focused
researchbecauseIthinkotherresearchoftenfailstoaddresswhatismostpertinentto
clients’needsforceremony-preparationandintegration.Thedifferencesandpotential
alliancesbetweenpsychotherapyandayahuascadeservefurtherinvestigation,buildingon
thequalitativeworkofSnider(2017)andRyan(2015).
Regarding‘getsyouoffyourhead’,ayahuasca-as-a-drugisthesinglebiggestobstacleto
morewidespreaduse.IwouldliketoreadaFoucauldianDiscourseAnalysisthatsituates
ayahuascawithinmainstreamdiscoursesaroundthewarondrugsandtheinternational
drugstrade.Thisobstacleissubtlerthanthemereproblemofillegality.Whatliesbehind
theillegalityofayahuascaistheconceptionofayahuascaasadangeroussubstance.Further
researchcouldhelptoclarifyandquestionthisconception,whichmaybringmorepeopleto
theconclusionsreachedbyP2,P3andP4.
Reflectionasaresearcher
Beforeconductingthisstudy,Iknewlittleofqualitativeresearchandno-oneresearching
psychedelics.Now,Iengagedailywithaninternationalcommunityofleadingayahuasca
researchers,whichisthemostdiversesocialgatheringIhaveeverencountered.
Duringthisresearch,Igavemyfirsttalkatapsychotherapyconferenceonayahuascaand
wrotemyfirstpaper(awaitingpublication)formyaccreditingpsychotherapycollege.Ihave
completedmyfirstqualitativestudyandimmersedmyselfincontemporarydiscourseson
research.Somewhereamongstthis,ayahuascaresearchhas,alongsidemyclientwork,
becomeanimportantpartofmylife.Ilookforward,beyondtheconclusion,tothenext
chapter.
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ConclusionHavingaccompaniedmeonthistrip,letmenowreviewtheterritoriesvisited.Aftermy
introduction,literaturereviewandmethodology,inmyfindings,Ipresentthefivethemes
underwhichIgroupparticipants’interviewresponses.
Mydiscussiontakesupthemainthemesfromthefindingsandsetsthemwithinthebroader
contextofexistingliterature.Iestablishthelimitationsofthisstudy,suggestimplicationsfor
psychotherapeuticpracticeandareasforfurtherresearch.Ibelievethefindingsand
researchworthwhiletothosefromarangeofdisciplinesbeyondpsychotherapy.Ireflecton
myselfasaresearchertoacknowledgeaprofoundchangeinmeduetoconductingthis
research.
Itwasmyhonourtohearwhatmyparticipantshadtosayoftheirayahuascaexperiences,
andIwashumbledtoreceivetheirtime,energyandcare.ThesenseImadeofthoseinthe
UKtellingmeoftheirayahuascaexperiencesisthatayahuascainsightsoftenleadto
substantiallifeimprovementsviathemechanismofdifferentperspectiveswhenusedas
oneofmanydifferentpathsofhealingwithinadynamicinterculturalexchange.
Psychotherapistsareonlyjustbeginningtoexplorethisvaluableareaand,followingmy
career-switchinspired,inpart,byayahuasca,Iamjuststartingout.Ibelievethisresearchto
beonthecuttingedge,bringingperspectivesfromexistentialphilosophythatchallenge
existingdiscoursesinaproductiveway.Ihopetotakemyresearchforward.
BreakingConventionStudentEssay2019Knowles21
Page21of28
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