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WE’RE ONLINE TOO! www. aldersgate.sg

WHEN FAMILY IS THE ISSUEBRAND NEW LOOK, SAME GOOD READ

ISSUE 11 | JUNE 2009

WHO’s TO

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Why was I born into it? Should I drag them back?Q&A

BLAME CRACKs ATHOME

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The media, school or God?

when

Aldersgate Methodist Church雅德门卫理公会

98 Dover Road Singapore 139647tel: 6773 1964 • email: [email protected]

www.aldersgate.sg

DONE READING THIS MAGAZINE?Pass it on to a friend, family or a colleaguer

DEC 08 liveline 01

LiveLine is a publication of Aldersgate Methodist Church, Singapore. Views expressed in

LiveLine are the contributors’ and do not necessarily reflect that of the church or the editorial team. Materials in LiveLine may only be reproduced

with permission from the editorial team or the contributors.

Printed by Pica Digital Pte Ltd

Advisors Pastor Chiang Ming Shun

Pastor William Sam

Editor-in-Chief Leslie Chiang

Editors Shirley Pee

Andrew Ang

Derrick Ho

Geraldine Ang

Gracia Chiang

Loh Ka Wai

Rudy David Wong

Teresa Chong

Tiffany Ang

Yip Poh Lin

Contributors Pastor Chiang Ming Shun

Pastor William Sam

Alvin Chua

Beverly Ang

Chen Qiuluan

Eric Chiok

Gordon Yuen

Gilbert Lok

Grace Ho

Henry Tan

Sheena Yang

Photographer Jacob Kong

IN THIs IssUE

RETHINKING THE FAMILY

JUNE 2009 | Issue 11

CONTRIBUTION OF ARTICLEsIf you have enjoyed reading

‘LiveLine’ and want to contribute a short write-up on your Bible reflections, your Pastoral Care

Group (PCG) activities or even share some ‘favourite makan places’ or a great place to shop, do drop us an

e-mail to let us know. We’ll be most happy to liaise with you for your

valued contributions. You can send your contributions to [email protected]

Please tell us how you feel about our new

design or about the issues covered.

Email us at [email protected]

We’d love to hear from you!

FEATURES

10 UndEr a flimsy roof Pastor Chiang Ming Shun explains why

families are in trouble and in need of rescue.

13 noT JUsT a Cool CErEmony Some non-Christians in Japan hold church

weddings because it’s in vogue, but what does tying the knot in a church really mean?

16 WHEn faiTH & family ClasH I hate my family, why did God put me

here? Is it important for the whole family to worship in the same church? Questions asked and answered.

REGULARS

4 mETHodisT minUTE We find out why Methodist pastors don’t

stay in one church for too long.

10 aroUnd aldErsGaTE LiveLine’s Editor-in-chief spends a day at

Fairfield Methodist Primary’s Uniquely mE and sees how volunteers there help.

22 sHoUT oUT Alvin Chua explains why he decided to

enter the workforce during these times of economic uncertainty.

25 lifEsTory Henry Tan reflects on the day his lung

collapsed and the miracle that came after.

26 TraVEl TalEs Sheena Yang explains how she survived

touring Taiwan with her sister based on “three-favours-a day”.

33 all aCCEss Eric Chiok gives his take on Stephen Curtis

Chapman’s latest album; Gordon Yuen takes us through Aldergate’s website revamp; and recipes from our very own ladies.

18HoUsE of minisTErsTwo families show how one household can make such a huge impact as they share what it’s like to serve in multiple ministries in and around church.

PaGE 26 Sheena Yang shares what travelling with her sister was like.

编辑团队前些时候决定以“家庭”作

为这一期《活力线上》的主题内容。

当时，我们并不晓得雅德门，这个尤

其重视家庭的教会社区，将在本月庆

祝创会三十周年纪念。我认为这个巧

合是神的安排。

可能关于家庭的课题已经说得太多

了，所以听起来有点老套。然而，如

果仔细想想，我们将发现许多社会问

题如青少年犯罪、堕胎、同性恋、赌

博与吸毒等等，都和当事人的家庭生

活素质息息相关。

许多孩子们都背着心酸的故事上

学，比如面临离婚的父母、缺乏父爱

的家庭、只懂得用钱给于无穷物质享

受却无暇施舍一小时陪伴孩子的父母

等等。

我个人很庆幸有教会和“家庭焦

点”等机制来继续传达保护家庭的重

要性。除非我们能持续不断的重视这

个基本社区核心的价值，否则我们的

社会将会迷失。

请到雅德门和我们一起为你的家庭

而庆祝。

ConsiDEr it a divinely arranged coincidence that our editorial team decided on the theme of family for this issue, without remembering that in May, Aldersgate celebrates her 30th Anniversary as a church community that values the family.

Maybe much has been said about the family that it sounds almost cliché but if we take time to consider, we will realise that much of societal issues like teenage delinquency, abortions, homosexuality,

gambling, drugs… and the list goes on, can in one way or other be

traced back to the quality of family life that victims caught in these issues have experienced.

Many of our children in schools carry heart-

breaking stories of parents on the verge of divorce, the

absent father, parents who give tonnes of money and material comforts to their children but cannot afford to give one hour to spend with their kids.

I am personally grateful for institutions like churches and ‘Focus on the Family’ that continue to sound the call for the protection and priority of our families. Unless we continue to place value and priority on this basic nucleus of community, our society is lost.

Join with us at Aldersgate and celebrate your family.

LEsLIE CHIANGEdiTor-in-CHiEf

JUNE 2009 | liveline | 01

编辑的前言

EDITOR’sforeword

PAsTOR’sreflection

thE PArAblE of the Lost Sheep and the Parable of the Lost Coin are two beautiful stories we have in the Bible.

In these stories, a shepherd and a woman make all-out efforts to search for a lost sheep and a lost coin.

If the sheep or the coin could voice their appreciation to the shepherd and the woman respectively, we may hear things like: “You never know how much your loving action has meant to me!”

It’s always, I believe, assuring and encouraging to know that there is someone out there who reaches out to us. These are the ones who put their love into actions.

But such persons are getting rarer in a world of hurry and flurry. Most people today will say: “There isn’t even enough time to finish the daily tasks I have on my plate, where then do I find the extra time and energy to reach out in love”

Do you find yourself saying the same thing? Do you find it a challenge to live day by day as a Mary - who sat and listened to Jesus when He visited - in a Martha - Mary’s sister who busied herself instead - world?

FIND FELLOWSHIP,NOT FOLLY, WHEN CAUGHTIN THE FLURRY

The speed of every day life is amazingly fast. Some, not wanting to lose out are tempted to go at an even faster pace, all at the expense of their health, marriage and family. Mohandas K. Gandhi once said: “There’s more to life than increasing its

speed.”As we celebrate our 30th Church Anniversary,

let us slow down, reach out in love and be a blessing. Zechariah 8:13b, the theme verse for our 30th Anniversary Celebration says: “… so will I save you and you will be a blessing. Do not be afraid but let your hands be strong.”

In this season of our family life at Aldersgate, we are looking at how we can be a blessing to others.

As St Francis has prayed so shall this prayer of his be ours too:

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace,where there is hatred, let me sow love;where there is injury, pardon;where there is doubt, faith;where there is despair, hope;where there is darkness, light;where there is sadness, joy;O Divine Master, grant that I may not so

much seek to be consoled as to console; to be understood as to understand; to be loved as to love. For it is in giving that we receive; it is in pardoning that we are pardoned; and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.

迷失的羊和失落的银币，是圣经中两个美丽的故事。

羊和银币虽然不见了，但并没有被遗弃或遗忘，因为有人竭尽所能地寻找它们。

如果羊和银币能对牧者和妇人表达感激之情，我们可能会听到这样的话：“你不会知道你爱的行动，对我来说意义有多重大！”

知道有人会帮助我们，总是让我们感到安心和鼓舞。然而，这些把爱化为行动的人，在这个世上已经越来越少了。如今，多数的人会说：“要做完每天的事已经不够时间了，哪里还有余力和时间伸出爱的援手？”

你发现自己也说同样的话吗？你觉得在马大那样忙碌的世界中，像马利亚那样日过一日是一种挑战吗？

时下的生活节奏非常快速，有些人为了不落人后，以更快的速度追逐生活，结果损失了自己的健康、婚姻和家庭。

圣雄甘地曾说：“生命的意义远大过加快生活的脚步。”

在我们庆祝雅德门卫理教会30周年的当儿，让我们放慢脚步，留一点时间向别人伸出爱的援手，成为他人的祝福。

这一季，雅德门把目光放在家庭生活上，我们将探讨如何成为他人的祝福，就让圣弗朗西斯的祷告词，也成为我们的。

主啊！求祢使我成为和平的工具，在仇恨的地方，让我播撒爱心；在伤害的地方，让我播撒宽恕；在怀疑的地方，让我播撒信心；在绝望的地方，让我播撒希望；在黑暗的地方，让我播撒光明；在悲哀的地方，让我播撒欢乐。噢，主啊！求你使我不求人的安慰，但求能安慰人；不求人的理解，但求能理解人；不求人的怜爱，但求能怜爱人。因为在施舍中，我们有所收获；在宽恕他人时，我们也被宽恕；在丧失生命时，我们将复活并得永生！

from the desk of

PAsTOR WILLIAM sAM

The speed of every day life is amazingly fast. some, not wanting

to lose out are tempted to

go on an even faster pace, all at the expense of their health, marriage and

family.

GOT A

ISSUE ORQUESTIONYOU WANT ANSWERED?

TELL US!

Send us your feedback and suggestions and we’ll try our best to include them in the next LiveLine

Email us [email protected]

02 | liveline | JUNE 2009

METHODIsT around aldersgateHaPPEninGs in and

THE METHODIST Church started as a small group movement within the Anglican Church. Methodist groups sprung up all over Britain and the United States, and there were so many groups in different cities that there were not enough pastors to go around.

So during the days of John Wesley, Methodist ministers rode on horses as they went about their travelling preaching ministry.

They would travel hundreds of miles on horseback to preach the Word of God. They were known as “Circuit Riders”. Each minister was in-charge of a few churches that were grouped together in Circuits. We inherited this itinerant system and this explains why Methodist ministers in Singapore are appointed to different churches from time to time.

The responsibility of appointing pastors to the twenty Trinity Annual Conference (TRAC) churches rests with the President of the Annual Conference who is advised by a Board of Appointments. The Board regularly looks at the needs of the various churches and recommends pastors for the best fit - the right pastor to the right church. – PAstor MinG shUn & PAstor WilliAM sAM

起初,英国圣公会有一群人兴起小组运动.后来逐渐形

成一个新兴的宗派-卫理公会,并在英国和美国如雨后

春笋般的茂盛起来,在各个城市成立了无数的小组,以

至牧师的数目不足以应付这么多小组的需要.

早期在约翰卫斯理的时代,卫理公会牧师们都是骑

马到处传道.他们长途跋涉数百哩路,传讲神的道.因此

被称为巡回牧师,每位牧师负责牧养几间教会.这些有

两间或超过两间教会所组成的牧区议会叫做巡回牧区

议会.

我们承袭这种巡回传道的系统,因此新加坡卫理公

会牧师都会被委派到各个堂会.

负责委派牧师到20间三一年议会(TRAC)堂会的,就

是会长.他在委任牧师之前,必须先与年议会委任部磋

商.委任部定期为各堂会的需要及牧

QWhy are Methodist pastors appointed annually? Why do methodist

pastors need to be appointed annually?

PAsTOR CHIANG MING sHUN

MAKING THEIR ROUNDS

PAsTOR WILLIAM sAM

WHAT Is AN ANNUAL CONFERENCE?

John Wesley used to gather his preachers and leaders annually to discuss theology, doctrine and other matters related to Methodism. We continue this today but the Annual Conference has evolved with the Methodist Church. Today in Singapore, local Methodist congregations are organised into three Annual Conferences: Trinity Annual Conference (TRAC), Chinese Annual Conference (CAC) and Emmanual Tamil Annual Conference (ETAC). Each Conference is headed by an elected President who is an ordained minister. According to the Methodist Discipline, “The purpose of Annual Conference is to make disciples for Jesus Christ by equipping its local churches for ministry and by providing a connection for ministry beyond the local church; all to the glory of God.” – PAstor MinG shUn

minute

UNIQUELY ME

MINIsTRY FOCUs

One Wednesday afternoon, I shadowed Jessie Chan as she makes her regular visit to Fairfield Primary School where the “Uniquely mE” programme is faithfully conducted, four days every school week. >>

by lEsliE ChiAnG

>> Pg 8 YOUNG ADULTs MEET FOR HIGH TEA

2000-2004 assistant Pastor Kampong Kapor methodist Church

LiveLine asks our two pastors where they were beforebeing posted to Aldersgate Methodist Church

2005 Pastor Kampong Kapor methodist Church

2006 Pastor-in-charge aldersgate methodist Church

2002-2006 assistant Pastorang mo Kio methodist Church

2007-2008 Pastorfaith methodist Church

2009 Pastoraldersgate methodist Church

04 | liveline | JUNE 2009 JUNE 2009 | liveline | 05

around aldersgate

I believe many of these kids will one day look back and see this programme as a life-changing event in their lives. – JEssIE CHAN, PROGRAMME COORDINATOR

If you would like to be involved in the “Uniquely Me” programme as a volunteer, you may contact Mrs Jessie Chan through the Aldersgate church office at 6773 1964.

CLOCKWIsE FROM LEFT: Ms Gaw starts the class by checking each student’s handbook for any outstanding homework; Jodi, another AMC volunteer, befriend and coaches her charges; Activities conducted in small groups led by volunteers; Ms Gaw commending a student for a job done well.

THE “UNIQUELY ME” programme was first initiated by a group of Fairfield School teachers from Aldersgate to help students in the Fairfield school who needed academic help.

Subsequently, in 2002, Jessie Chan, took over as the programme coordinator and the “Uniquely Me” programme was positioned as one of the projects under the Social Concerns ministry in Aldersgate.

Today, this initiative has now blossomed into a strategic ministry reaching 26 primary 3 and 4 students, conducted from Tuesday to Friday every school week and staffed by a partnership effort between Fairfield teachers and 10 volunteers from Aldersgate.

Volunteers, according to Jessie, consist of retirees, home-makers and students in transition who spend 2 hours from 1:45 to 3:45 pm each week to befriend a group of 1 to 4 students and to provide much-needed coaching in Math and English.

Ms Gaw is a trained teacher

specially engaged by the school to run the programme. While her role is to ensure classroom discipline, look for teaching resources and conduct a teaching session in the first hour, the volunteers serve as small-group coaches and classroom assistants who are well positioned to befriend students and provide personal coaching in a less threatening environment. According to Jessie, some students will warm up to the volunteers enough to even share their personal or family struggles which are opportunities for the volunteers to encourage and minister to these young lives.

LiveLine asked Jessie why she was

involved with this ministry these past 6 years. Without much thought, she confidently replied, “Firstly, I see the need to help these students, secondly, this is a wonderful avenue for Christians and the church to be involved in nurturing young lives and finally, I believe many of these kids will one day look back and see this programme as a life-changing event in their lives.”

Although she shyly declined to be photographed, her parting words to me was to thank and appreciate all existing and past volunteers who have quietly but faithfully given of their time and resource to make this ministry an impactful one. She remembered some faith-stretching years when she had only 2 volunteers to work with but somehow they pulled through and she is grateful for the team of 10 that co-labour with her now.

“WE DID not start out as CLAY. We were first known as Group for Accountability and Prayer (GAP). A group of youths from Fairfield Methodist Secondary felt that there was a lack of accountability and prayer in the weekly youth ministry meetings, thus they decided to come together every Friday fortnightly to do just that with the help of 3 mentors. It was the first mixed gender group that was formed for the 13-16years old.

So when it was time to formally make the shift for the older youths in JC and above to be in a mixed group, we decided to stay together and form a group.

We are a lively group of people that loves to eat, talk and have fun together. Over and above that, we look forward to learning more about each other and God’s word through Bible study.

Taking turns to host PCG at our homes, unlike meeting in church like we used to, has proven to be a winning formula in forging stronger bonds with our own members and also the new friends that we bring. Many feel welcomed and are comfortable sharing the things that each one has been going through no matter how small it may seem to be.

We hope that our group can be a place where non-Christian friends come to see and experience the same warmth and love that we have for them, for each other and also for God.

我们的小组组名是“圣果”。圣果小组

在2002年成立。至今，大约有16位组员。

我们的小组刚增添一位新成员，就是刚

出世的吴育恒小弟弟，而年纪最大是秀

花姐，现年74岁。我们小组就如一个大

家庭，一起团契，彼此关怀。小组在每

月的第一个星期六聚会。

“圣果”这组名主要是取自加拉太书

5:22-23。圣灵所结的果子就是仁爱、喜

乐、和平、忍耐、恩慈、良善、信实、

温柔、节制。圣灵的果子就是圣灵在我

们生命里面的工作。圣灵所结出的这些

品格特性，都可以从耶稣基督的本性

中看到。这些都是我们让基督掌管生

命而结出的果子。如果我们想在生命

中结出圣灵的果子，就必须与基督的

生命联合。盼望各组员在耶稣基督里

成长，以主耶稣为榜样，结出圣灵的

果子。

“I have learnt that not only must we be bound to God spiritually, it is also important to have social bonds with earthly mates” – EDWIN

“ I feel that CLAY has provided me a family from which I can learn, grow and have fun” – CHEE sIONG

“ What I have gained from our PCG are not only lessons or life impacts but a family…one where I

feel comfortable and a group that I know I can

turn to when I need” – DANIEL WOON

关怀牧养小组分享

黎维忠弟兄

圣果组”

LETTING THE MASTER MOULD

PAsTORAL CARE GROUP sPOLIGHT

CHRIsT LIVING ABUNDANTLY IN YOU (CLAY)

by ChEn QiUlUAn


around aldersgate

MARCH M YHEM!BOYs’ BRIGADE UPDATEs

During the March holidays, Boys and recruits from the 33rd Singapore company spent an extended time building friendships and bonds with their new squad leaders and each other.

A

AfTER SEVEN years of dedicated service as Captain of the 33rd Singapore Company, Mr Glen Tan (below right) has handed over the baton to Mr Joel Li (above). Joel formally took over as Captain of the company in April at the Enrolment Service.

The 26-year-old is a Mathematics teacher at Fairfield Methodist School (Secondary). Like Glen, Joel rose through the ranks in the 33rd and returned during his junior college days to volunteer as a senior during which he served as a drill and adventure officer. Joel worships at Grace Methodist Church.

— DERRICK HO

Change of Guard

WHO SAID HIGH TEAS WERE ONLY FOR TAI-TAIS?

IN AN effort to build better friendships amongst our young adults in Aldersgate Methodist Church, members from all young adult PCGs came together at a YAM High Tea Fellowship on 27 Dec 2008 at the NUSS Guild House. More than 50 young adults interacted over dim sum. We shared light banter, and engaged in serious conversation on how the church can minister to young adults, how young adults can contribute to the body-life at AMC, and how AMC can serve the community.

YOUNG ADULTs MINIsTRY

by GilbErt loK

Photos by niCholAs AnG ONUNFAMILIALGROUNDS

WHEN FAMILY Is THE IssUE

PG 10 Under One (Flimsy) RoofPG 10 When Faith & Family CollidePG 10 House Of Ministers

FEATUREs

>>


WHILE GOD KEEPS STEADFAST LOvE FOR THOUSANDS AND FORGIvES SINS, CHILDREN PERPETUATE THE ERRORS OF THEIR FAMILIES FOR THREE OR FOUR GENERATIONS.

A RECENT POLL conducted by The Straits Times showed that some children today consider having to get their own glass of water from the kitchen a household chore.

When I was young, a household chore was washing the clothes for the whole family, or hanging them up to dry. A chore was something like washing and cooking rice for the whole family for dinner. These were chores I did almost everyday. I never considered having to get my own drink a “chore”.

In Singapore, there are more and more cases of children and youth who are “beyond parental control”. In 2007

alone, there were 140 new cases. Who would have imagined in the past that there would come a time when young children of primary school age would be uncontrollable, even by their own parents?

We now hear stories of children who refuse to attend school and instead closet themselves at home because of gaming addiction. We read stories about children who attack parents and teachers.

Everywhere you turn today, you see signs of disintegration of the family. Where did things go wrong?

I think it was when we focused mainly on academic education, when we saw the school as the main institution for preparing and grooming children for adulthood. Of course, this

families are in trouble.

only to be expected now that parents spend so much time at work and children, so much time in school.

But is instruction in languages, science and mathematics (and so on) all there is to education? What about character? Can character be taught in a school as a subject in an hour a week? Education in traditional, or advanced and innovative subjects may prepare you for a job and a livelihood, but it doesn’t quite prepare everyone for life.

We need firstly to learn values. Values that are neither trendy or of the moment, nor derived from consensus. We need values that are also high ideals, values that don’t come from within us but from beyond us. These are exemplars to live up to, some perspective of goodness that can inspire us.

Secondly, we need to live them out. Knowing one set of values while living to another is hypocrisy. People who only make a show of being righteous are not called saintly; they are called sanctimonious.

Where should we learn about values and how do we live them out? In families.

We need families to reproduce honourable and moral values. families are best-placed to pass on ethics and standards. The Bible tells us in Proverbs 22:6, “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.”

Children will copy and reproduce both the values and their practice from what they have experienced in their own families (see “Bringing Up A Criminal”). for example, a child whose parents are selfish, who do not care for others while seeking to fulfil their own needs, will probably grow up to be the same.

Perhaps that is what the Bible means in the book of Exodus, chapter 34 verses 6 and 7:

“The LORD, the LORD, a God merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love and

faithfulness, keeping steadfast love for thousands, forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin, but who will by no means clear the guilty, visiting the iniquity of the fathers on the children and the children’s children, to the third and the fourth generation.”

While God keeps steadfast love for thousands and forgives sins, children perpetuate the errors of their families for three or four generations.

The senior prison chaplain in Singapore tells me that one trend he notes among prisoners is that most of them come from dysfunctional families. Parents who go wrong lead their children into error. Unless someone intervenes, the wrongdoing is preserved (see “Reaching Out”).

On the other hand, while errors are maintained for a time, we are told that those who love God and keep His commandments are sustained for a thousand generations. Deuteronomy 7:9 says:

“Know therefore that the LORD your God is God, the faithful God who keeps covenant and steadfast love with those who love him and keep

his commandments, to a thousand generations...”

AGE-OLD PROBLEMsThe Bible has a lot to say about dysfunctional families. In fact, it is full of them. Incest, adultery, favouritism, all these are in the Bible. Even when families were fine, problems would still crop up. for example, Jesus’ family thought that he was mad! We read in Mark 3:21 that after Jesus had begun his work and appointed his twelve apostles, “when his family heard it, they went out to seize him, for they were saying: ‘He is out of his mind.’”

And yet the Bible has an unsurpassable example for us to follow – God Himself. We are told that:

• God is “gracious and merciful, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love…” (Joel 2:13)

• He “delights in steadfast love” (Micah 7:18)

• God is love (1 John 4:8)• He is the God of truth (Isaiah

65:16)As we read about how God loves

us as a father, as we learn about His

>>

>>>


BY PASTOR CHIANG MING SHUN


character, we have our role model and paradigm. As we seek to conform to His ways, we can build strong families.

IT sTARTs FROM TWOAnother way to build strong families is to have strong marriages. When children are nurtured in a caring and affirming environment by loving parents, when they can see love in action, they will be better able to follow their parents’ example.

Yet even the traditional concept of marriage is in danger today. The entertainment and popular media happily and regularly send us messages that it is legitimate to have sex outside of marriage, that single-parent families are normal, that divorce is unexceptional.

In fact, I cannot recall a single Hollywood movie I have seen in years that show married couples being intimate: they all depict sex between unmarried couples.

We need to support and strengthen marriages so that families might be tenacious and indomitable.

The Bible tells us that God created man and woman in His image. Not just that they look like Him, but that together, they resemble His beauty, love and character. The Bible also says

that the first couple chose to disobey God and hence lost their relationship with God. Apart from God, man only got worse.

We need to recover God’s plan for marriage, which is one man and one woman complementing each other, building not just on each other’s strengths and negating each other’s weaknesses, but developing and improving each other so that each blooms and prospers.

Training and time are needed for this, which is why marriage preparation and marriage enrichment are of the essence. We know how a wedding should run, but we need to learn, above all, how to be married for life (see “The fashionable Wedding”).

WHEN THINGs FALL APARTYet marriages are breaking up faster today. It seems that almost half of all marriages in the US end in divorce.

In Singapore, the general divorce rate is about eight persons for every 1,000 married persons according to 2007 figures. But the rate is going up. I know a couple who broke up less than a year after getting married.

Divorce is not God’s plan. In fact, the words of the marriage vows specifically say you agree to be

Senior chaplain at Prison Fellowship Singapore, Rev Dr Chiu Ming Li, highlights four categories of families that can contribute to the “production” of criminals.

1 Over-indulgent Parents

often, rich or middle-class families

give children everything they want.

These parents give their children

everything, including lots of money,

toys, even businesses, to over-

compensate for perceived deprivations

like absent parents. These kids then

grow up expecting everything they

want to be given to them.

2 Absent Parents

Parents in these

families may be dead,

in prison, out on the

streets or they simply

don’t care. as a result,

their kids grow up

never knowing parental

love or discipline, so

they have no family

socialisation and no concept of a

relationship with a significant other.

They are like the lost children in

the Peter Pan story. These children

end up starved of attention, and

desperate for affirmation and a

sense of belonging. They often find

these in the wrong company.

3 Authoritarian/Abusive Parents

These parents overwhelm

their children with criticism. They

give very little affirmation so their

children seek solace among other

verbally abused children. They

are inwardly bitter but outwardly

ingratiating, while yearning for

affirmation.

4 Wrong Role Model Parents

some parents are already

involved in vice – the mother might

be a prostitute, the father a drug

addict or gangster. Their child

has no one else to follow after

and end up following their

parents’ way of life. in this

vicious circle, the children

learn from their parents how

to be parents. They repeat

the cycle of neglect and

abusiveness towards their

own children.

married “as long as you both shall live” (or “till death do you part” in older versions). Couples take an oath to remain married “for better, for worse”.

Unfortunately, it is not that clear-cut nowadays. With reduced community support for troubled marriages, with straightforward and more convenient procedures to get divorced, with the removal of the stigma of divorce, it has become an easy option.

Jesus taught in Mark 10 and Matthew 19 that, while it was not God’s original plan to allow divorce, Moses permitted it because of the hardness of man’s heart.

I am not saying that nobody should get divorced. I am saying that divorce

must be a last resort and not another alternative in a whole bundle of choices.

Where reconciliation has been tried and found impossible, when abusive spouses refuse to change, when a spouse or children are in danger, certainly and regrettably divorce may be explored.

But allowing “no-fault” divorce, or divorce for irreconcilable differences just cheapens the whole enterprise. It encourages couples not to weather storms together.

Keeping a marriage together necessitates working through difficulties. This is hard and painful. But it can be done with God’s help.

REACHING OUTBRINGING UPA CRIMINAL

>> What can you do when you encounter struggling families and marriages?

Pray for them. Better still, pray WiTH them.

listen to them without judging. listen to understand and support.

do not suggest divorce! instead persuade them to seek help.

approach your pastor for a list of Christian counsellors.

Having your wedding in church means more than just wearing a gown and walking down the aisle behind flower-strewing girls.

In Japan, when a couple has already been married, it has become fashionable to have a western-style “church wedding” to round off the experience, although most of the population there are followers of Shinto or Buddhism. Almost always, an actor is hired to play the part of the priest or pastor, and the couple gets to enjoy a “church wedding” escapade.

Getting married in church means that you seek God’s blessings and the church’s recognition of your marriage. It means that instead of having some fuzzy feeling of love as the source of

your marriage, you have decided to let God be the centre and sustainer of your marriage. It means that you call on the church, with all its resources, to come around and reinforce your marriage.

It also means that when things go wrong you turn to the church for help:

1You return to the pastor who married you or to the pastor of your church for

advice, not just to friends and family.

2You allow the church to assist in healing and reconciling, and not

immediately consider separation.

3You try and follow God’s principles in saving your marriage and not the

way of the world.

A FASHIONABLE WEDDING


家庭出了问题。

《海峡时报》最近的调查

显示，有些孩子甚至把到

厨房拿一杯水喝当成家事杂务。

在我小时候，家事杂务是帮全家洗衣

或晾衣、为全家煮饭，这就是我当时几

乎每天都做的家务，我从没想过给自己

倒水也算在内。

在新加坡，越来越多儿童与少年让父

母难以管教，单是2007年就有140起新案

例。从前，有谁会想到竟有这么一天，

小学生已任性到连父母都束手无策。

如今，我们听到有的孩子沉迷于电脑

游戏而不愿上学；有的孩子甚至攻击父

母和老师。

现在不管我们走到哪里，都能看到家

庭成员之间脱节的迹象，到底哪里出了

问题？

我想，当我们把焦点放在教育、当我

们把学校当成是培养和装备孩子步入社

会的主要机构，问题就产生了。当然，

由于今日父母长时间工作及孩子长时间

在学校，这也是可以理解的。

然而，教导语文、科学和数学（及其

他科目），是教育的全部吗？品行呢？

品行可以成为科目，每星期教一小时

吗？传统、先进或创意科目，可以为一

个人将来的职业作准备，但作为日后生

活的准备，是不太足够的。

我们必须先学习人生的价值观，这

些价值观不是建构在时尚、潮流和当下

的感觉上。我们需要的价值观是高标准

的，不是随兴而是超越自我，可以追求

同个屋檐下从古至今的问题

圣经提到的问题家庭，不胜枚举，好像

乱伦、通奸和偏心等等。就算不是问题家

庭，也难免出现问题。好比耶稣的家人就觉

得他疯了。马可福音3:21记录，当耶稣要去

传道并设立12门徒时，“耶稣的亲属听见，

就出来要拉住他，因为他们说他癫狂了。”

圣经有一个无法超越的典范让我们效

仿，那就是上帝。圣经告诉我们：

•上帝“有恩典，有怜悯，不轻易发

怒，有丰盛的慈爱……”(约珥书2:13)

•“喜爱施恩”。(弥迦书7:18)

• 神就是爱。(约翰一书4:8)

• 是真实的神。(以赛亚书65:16)

当我们知道上帝是如何像父亲般爱我

们，当我们懂得他的性格，我们就有一个学

习的典范。当我们遵照上帝的诫命，就可以

建立一个稳固的家庭。

问题从婚姻开始建立稳固家庭的另一个方法是先有稳固

的婚姻。当孩子看到恩爱的父母，并在关

怀和给予肯定的环境中长大；当他们看到

父母的言行中充满爱，他们自然较能效仿父

母。

然而，对婚姻的传统看法，在今日已岌

岌可危。大众化媒体和娱乐圈不断传送这样

的讯息：婚姻以外的性关系是可以接受的；

单亲家庭是正常的；离婚没什么大不了。事

实上，这些年来我看过的好莱坞电影，几乎

少不了未婚男女的性关系，我不记得有任何

一部讲述婚姻中的亲密关系。

我们必须支持和巩固我们的婚姻，以便

章明舜牧师

并激发我们做得更好和更团结的。

其次，有了价值观后，必须付诸实

践，如果说一套做一套便是虚伪。那些标

榜自己很正直的人，不是圣洁，而是假道

德。

要如何学习正确的人生价值观，并身

体力行呢？这必须从家庭开始。

我们需要家庭把正确的价值观传给

下一代，箴言22:6告诉我们：“教养孩

童，使他走当行的道，就是到老他也不偏

离。”

孩子会模仿和重复他们在家里看到的

价值和言行（见小文“家庭繁衍罪犯”）

。如果父母是贪婪和自私的，为达目的而

无视他人的，那么他们长大后可能也会像

他们的父母一样。

也许这就是出埃及记34 :6 - 7所说

的：“耶和华，耶和华，是有怜悯有恩典

的神，不轻易发怒，并有丰盛的慈爱和诚

实。为千万人存留慈爱，赦免罪孽，过

犯，和罪恶，万不以有罪的为无罪，必追

讨他的罪，自父及子，直到三，四代。”

尽管上帝爱世人并宽恕我们的罪过，

但子女往往延续家族的错误直到三四代。

一名到监狱服务的本地资深牧师告诉

我，他发现囚犯多来自问题家庭，父母犯

错导致孩子也走上歧途。除非有人干预，

否则错误将延续下去。另方面，圣经告诉

我们，只要我们爱上帝并遵守的诫命，将

信守我们：“所以，你要知道耶和华你的

神，他是神，是信实的神。向爱他，守

他诫命的人守约，施慈爱，直到千代。”

（申命记7:9）

家庭可以稳如磐石，不受动摇。

圣经告诉我们，神照着自己的形像造

人；人不单长得像神，也有类似神的爱和性

格。圣经告诉我们，神造的第一对男女因不

服从神，而和神断了关系。离开神后，人类

只会变得更糟。

我们必须回到神要求一男一女结合的婚

姻制度，婚姻不仅仅是互相取长补短，而是

帮助彼此成长和提升，以便双方都能发挥所

长。

这需要训练和时间，这也是为什么婚前

准备和强化婚姻是重要的。我们都知道怎样

筹划一场婚礼，但我们更需要学习如何维系

一辈子的婚姻。(见小文“时尚婚姻”)

当婚姻亮红灯今日的婚姻很难天长地久，美国一半的婚姻

看来就以离婚收场。在本地，离婚率是8％

，相当于每1000人就有8人离婚，这个比例

还在上升中。我认识的一对夫妇，结婚不到

一年就离婚。

离婚不是神的原意。事实上，你们也在

结婚誓言中同意“有生之年”都会持守婚

姻(或至死才会分离)，并许下“无论遭遇好

坏”都携手共度的诺言。

不幸的是，如今情况改变了，社区对问

题婚姻支持不足的同时，离婚程序却变得越

来越简便，加上离婚已经见怪不怪，成了一

个方便选择。

耶稣在马可福音第10章和马太福音第19

章里告诉我们，神无意让世人离婚，摩西所

以允许休妻是因为男人的心变硬了。

我不是说绝不可离婚，我是说离婚应该

是无可奈何的最后途径，而不是众多选择中

的一项。

当努力尝试后仍无法在一起；当暴力的

一方拒绝改变；当其中一方或子女的生命受

到威胁，那就要探讨离婚的可能性。

然而，允许“没问题”的离婚，或为了

未经调解的分歧，就轻易放弃婚姻，这等于

是鼓励夫妻不必共患难。

于其放弃婚姻，为何不先尽全力挽救？

破镜重圆不等于漠视问题和伤害，不是对不

满睁一只眼闭一只眼，或默默承受痛苦。维

系婚姻必须共同走过困境。这是艰难和痛苦

的，但可以在神的帮助下办到。

邱明理牧师是资深的监狱牧师。他在谈到

问题家庭和罪犯之间的关系时，列举了4

种会“生产”罪犯的家庭。

1 过度溺爱的父母

很多时候，富裕或中产家庭，对孩子总

是有求必应，他们给孩子他们想要的，包括

大笔金钱、玩具，甚至是生意，对无法陪伴

在孩子身边作出过度补偿。这些孩子长大后

也期待他们要什么有什么。

　

2缺席／忽略的父母，并有婚姻问题

这些家庭的父母也许已经逝世，或在监

狱服刑，或在外流浪或根本就不关心家庭。

结果，孩子在没有爱和纪律的家庭长大，

他们没有和父母沟通的体验，也不知道如

家庭繁衍罪犯何与至亲维持关系；他们就像童话故事

《小飞侠彼得潘》里迷失的孩子一样，

急着想获得归属感和他人的肯定，结果

误交损友。

3权威式家长／施虐的家长

这些家长过度批判他们的孩子，

他们很少肯定孩子，这使到孩子向粗野

的孩子靠拢。这些孩子尽管内心充满委

屈，表面上却摆出逢迎的态度，希望得

到认可。

4错误示范的家长

有些家长涉及黑社会活动，母

亲可能是妓女，父亲可能是嗜毒者或私

会党徒。他们的子女也有样学样，步父

母的后尘。

在教堂结婚的意义，远超越穿结婚礼

服，在花童开路下走过长廊。

在日本，虽然大部分人是神道和佛

教徒，但男女结婚后，再行一次西式

婚礼已成了时尚。他们通常聘请艺人

扮演道士或牧师，以便享受一次“教堂

婚礼”。

在教堂结婚意味着寻求上帝赐福，及

教会对这段婚姻的认可。这意味着你不

是把婚姻建立在对爱的感觉上，而是让

上帝成为维系婚姻的基石。这意味着你

让教会和它的资源包容你和强化你的婚

姻。这也意味着当婚姻出现问题时，你

将向教会求助。

1. 你可向为你主持婚礼的牧师或教会的

牧师求助，而不只是向朋友和家人求

助。

2.你允许教会协助修复和调解，而不是

马上考虑分居。

3.你尝试遵循上帝的教诲来挽救婚姻，

而不是跟随世人的做法。

当你接触有问题的家庭和婚姻时，

能怎么办呢？

1 为他们祷告，更好是和他们一起祷告。

2 怀着同理心聆听，给予支持而不评断。

3 不可建议离婚！鼓励他们寻求帮助。

4 向牧师索取基督徒辅导员的名单。

不要漠视求助的声音。如果有地方出了问

题，就必须把它处理好！如果你掩盖问题，

有一天可能会一发不可收拾。

伸出援手

时尚婚姻


1 My family thinks I’m spending too much time in church and complain that I’m neglecting my

family, studies, etc. How do I balance the two? families generally want the best for each other. So these complaints may have very good intentions behind them. Take them seriously and examine yourself – are you really neglecting your family? You need to talk to them and reassure them. Are you really coping well? If you are not sure, talk to your pastor as well.

But it is not always a choice between family and church. Have you considered that your family might be your mission field, your area of service? Loving and serving your family members are far more difficult than loving and serving other church members or strangers. But if you don’t do it, who will?

If your family is Christian, why don’t you consider serving together with them? You can study the Bible together, assist in the same ministry or work in the same committee.

2 I hate my family. They have so many faults. Why did God put me here? A lot of people think

this way, but it still doesn’t make it the Right Attitude. The fact is, whether we can see it or whether we want to admit it or not, ALL families have problems, some bigger than others. Some families have hiccups every now and then, others struggle daily. There is no perfect family because no one is perfect.

So maybe God put you where you are to teach you how to love. After all, we were in our sin and God still loved us. Jesus said in John 13:34-35, “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” We are called to love each other, especially those we may consider unloveable. Maybe God also put you there to teach you how to pray. What you can do is pray every day for your family members individually. Pray in love and ask God to bless them. Praying will not only change your heart towards them, it will change them also.

3 My parents are non-believers and don’t allow me to go to church, pray or read the Bible.

How do I respect them and yet follow Christ? Parents do this because they don’t know Christianity and they fear losing a child to an unknown entity. They have to see that Christianity makes people better children, not more disobedient or rebellious.

Become a model child at home and you will give your parents a good impression of Christianity. Offer to pray for your family members. Perhaps then they will be more open and flexible.

On the other hand, we have to be good children of our father in heaven as well. There may come a time when we have to make hard choices. Since there are different levels of parental objection, you should consult your pastor before making a decision.

1 My children worship in a different church. Is it important for families to worship in the same

church? It is very important for families to worship together, but it is perhaps just as important for every Christian to be able to worship God “in spirit and truth” (John 4:23-24). If children find they can grow better in soil elsewhere, then they should be planted there. The crucial thing is that they are able to grow.

What parents can do is make sure the church their children want to worship in is the real thing. There are too many strange places these days. So do a little investigation, go and attend worship there yourself, talk to your own pastor about it.

Naturally, it also depends on the age of the children. Look at it this way: are the children of an age where you would allow them to choose their own school? If so, and if it is an unknown school, wouldn’t you at least check up on it first?

2 My children have backslided and don’t want to come to church. Should I “drag”

them every Sunday in the hope that they will one day be saved or should I let them decide when they want to come back to Christ? God has no “grandchildren”, only children. Everyone must come to God on their own and personally accept Him as Lord and Saviour. All too often, children come to church only because of their parents. It becomes part of their Sunday routine and they never develop personal faith in Jesus. So it may not be a question of backsliding. They may never have had faith in the first place! Or they may have outgrown their childish faith but not developed the historic Christian faith. faith at home should not be a Sunday show. Parents must take responsibility for developing their children into Christian disciples. What the children see at home during the week has to be a continuation of what they see in church on Sunday.

So create a worshipping environment at home by praying and studying the Bible together. Don’t “tell” your children, show them and lead them instead. If your children see what you have is good, they will want it for themselves too.

3 My spouse is a non-believer. How can I respect his/her views yet bring him/her to

church? There is some teaching about this from 1 Corinthians 7:10 onwards. The Bible says that we are not to leave unbelieving spouses, and that they can become holy because of us.

The most important thing you can do is pray for your spouse. Then expose your spouse to the Gospel without imposing your views. Consider reading the Bible in your spouse’s presence. Share what you learned in church. Ask your spouse how you can pray for him/her. Host a small group meeting in your home.

Again, it is crucial that your life reflect the grace of God. Otherwise you are just opening yourself up to charges of hypocrisy.

Remember also that respect is a two-way street. Non-believing spouses should also respect beliefs of Christians and not forbid church attendance.

READ THE CHINEsEVERsION ONLINE www. aldersgate.sg

faith versus familyWHaT HaPPEns WHEn THEy CollidE?


HEard amonG THE adUlTsHEard amonG THE yoUTHs


ofHOUSEMINISTERS

Driven by love, two families share how they use their

individual skills and talents to build the church of God.

By GRACE HO

FROM LEFT: Eugene; Joel; Christina and Philip


THE TANSPHILIP TAN, 53, Bank Regional Corporate ManagerWhat are your areas of ministry?I teach in the Church School. Years ago, I used to lecture on a part-time basis, imparting knowledge and training others, so I thought of bringing my teaching skills into service in church. I am also an usher.

What spiritual gifts are you exercising? Teaching. Children are open to anything so it’s important that we teach them the right values from young.

What has been your most encouraging experience? It caught me by surprise when the kids came up to me one day and told me that they liked what I taught. They also said “thank you”. When kids say that, they really mean it.

CHRISTINA TAN, 51, Church staffWhat are your areas of ministry? I started working in the church office 11 years ago and I help to keep the accounts. I had been working in the commercial world for too long and was looking for a change of environment. It’s usually “backstage work” that I do, such as overseeing administration and property management, so that the church can run smoothly.

What has kept you in this job? I’m thankful for my colleagues. We often help each other out. for example, Clara is in charge of the bulletins but we all help to fold them and see tasks to completion. Somehow, in a Christian environment, we give and take, making sure that things go well in the end.

What is your most satisfying experience? I am most satisfied when everything goes smoothly during the weekly service (with no breakdowns). EUGENE TAN, 23, third-year undergraduate What are your areas of ministry? I’m the student president of Singapore Management University’s Campus Crusade for Christ (CCC) ministry, and a youth pastoral care group (PCG) coordinator and leader of a group of 19-year-olds in church.

What spiritual gifts are you exercising? Shepherding and teaching. I have been able to translate difficult concepts into something easier to understand and also be involved in casting visions for both ministries.

What has been your most memorable experience? When my PCG showed their appreciation through a video they made for PCG Leaders’ Appreciation Day and when my small group at university sang me a song – 朋友 (friends).

JOEL TAN, 20, FULL-TIME NATIONAL SERvICE MANWhat are your areas of ministry?I serve in the 33rd Boys’ Brigade Junior Company at Fairfield Methodist Primary, lead worship every month for the pre-school ministry in church and am involved in the Youthphoria outreach committee. I’ve been doing ad hoc work for the Boys’ Brigade since my JC days. What has been your most encouraging experience? Seeing the boys move on to Fairfield Methodist Secondary. It’s encouraging to see that they are growing in Christ. I’ve found my passion in kids.

Are there new areas you are interested in serving in? I am now learning how to present gospel stories using balloon sculpturing and magic tricks. I hope to use that in my ministry!

It caught me by surprise when the kids came up to me one day and told me that they liked what I taught.

PHILIP

>>

PHOTOS BY JACob KonG


THE CHOOS

WILLIAM CHOO, 46, General Manager of a shipping company What are your areas of ministry? I served as an usher since I was a young adult but became the chief usher two years ago. The role is a good fit because planning the usher roster and managing the usher duties are tasks I’m able to do in between my travel schedule. My wife and I also host a pastoral care group (PCG) called Oasis 1.

What spiritual gifts are you exercising? More of the gift of helps. The ushers are usually the first group of people whom worshippers meet and interact with just before entering the sanctuary. for the PCG, it would be more about being hospitable.

What are your most encouraging experiences? The smile on the worshippers’ faces, their warm handshakes and cheerful greetings add joy to our service to God as ushers. As a PCG facilitator, I am encouraged by our new members’ openness in sharing their faith journey with the group.

CHOO AIK ENG, 46, HR executive What are your areas of ministry? I have been serving as a teacher assistant in the Church School (K1/K2 level). The Church School played a significant role in imparting biblical principles in all our three children, and serving there is my

expression of thanksgiving to God and to the group of teachers. I’ve also recently started volunteering at the Uniquely mE programme at Fairfield Methodist Primary.

What spiritual gifts are you exercising? I see myself more in the area of helps. Teacher assistants play a more supporting role during class – paying more individual attention to each student, helping them with activities and reinforcing the Bible stories.

What is your most encouraging experience? It’s heart-warming to see the children, young as they may be, responding to the love of God through their singing and listening to Bible stories.

HOSEA CHOO, 19, NSmanWhat are your areas of ministry? I play the guitar in the worship team for Youthphoria and the Sunday Service. I’m also a PCG leader for the Secondary 3 and 4 guys. About three years ago, I facilitated a group for the 40 Days of Purpose programme and that group later became my PCG.

What spiritual gifts are you exercising? My gifts are shepherding, creative communications and faith. My passion is evangelism through music so I try and serve wherever I can.

What has been your most encouraging experience? Last year during church camp, I saw how my PCG mature in their faith, their sharing, and the way they worship and pray. It’s great to see them grow.

ATHALIA CHOO, 16, Secondary 4 student What are your areas of ministry? I’m helping in the 8.30am kindergarten Church School. I’ll help out with whatever they require, like with worksheets and during interaction time.

How did you get involved? Last year, we had to serve in church for two months to earn a badge for the Girls’ Brigade. I enjoyed it very much and decided to stay on as a teacher assistant. I guess it’s the gift of helps. I like children and being around them.

What is your most encouraging experience? I feel very happy when the kids come up and say “hi” after Church School. They actually remember you!

AMANDA CHOO, 12, Secondary 1 studentWhat are your areas of ministry? I used to count the weekly offering in Church School before joining Youthphoria

this year. We would write how much money was collected, sign our names and submit the form to the church office.

What did you learn? Sometimes my friend and I would count different amounts so we ended up recounting and recounting. Finally, we decided to count together. It’s important to put the money into groups of $1 or $10 so it’s easier.

Are there new areas you are interested in serving in? Maybe the same as my sister – helping out in Church School. I have also seen my mother serving there.

FROM LEFT: Athalia; Amanda; William; Hosea and Aik Eng.

I’m helping in the 8.30am kindergarten Church School. I guess it’s the gift of helps. I like children and being around them.

ATHALIA

>>


sHOUTOUT

JEREMIAH 29:11 SAYS: “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope

and a future.” Today, many in the working force are

wondering if they could be jobless by the end of the day. Most people my age are wondering if they can find a job once they graduate. As I am writing this, there are about 15,000 degree holders who are jobless. And while you are reading this, there will be about 12,000 more fresh graduates looking for a job.

With bleak figures like these, is it still possible to believe in Jeremiah 29:11?

I would have just graduated by the time this issue of LiveLine is published and I cannot deny that I am not looking forward to it. Don’t get me wrong, my university days were great, and they still are.

But with the weeks left in school dwindling into single digits, the uneasiness of the next phase of my life has more than replaced the relief that school is ending. Studying seemed to have lost its sheen, especially with the fairer gender of the same age earning a load of cash because they have had a few years of headstart. A minor inferiority complex is creeping in.

A year ago, my friends and I decided to graduate and take that next big step into the working world. Normal conversation topics included where the next step of life will take us, where we will be going for our grad trip and, of course, the impending economic recession.

Though things didn’t seem bad at the time, most people felt that the logical decision was to continue studying. Why enter the workforce at a time when the future looked so uncertain? I made a last-minute logical decision to continue on in my Honours year.

Nearly a year later, what seem “not so bad” at that time

had turned out to be worse. Following the dramatic changes to the economic situation, the conversations have likewise changed. There is still talk of an economic recession, but less of grad trips and even less of where the next step of life will be. Half of my friends do not seem to have made any concrete plans for life after university.

I guess I’m one of the fortunate ones. I applied for and was recently accepted into the National Institute of Education (NIE). No more interviews, waiting for replies, or worse, receiving rejection letters. It is probably not a

surprise that I’ve taken this route too. It would have been the same decision had I graduated a year earlier.

Everything I did in life seemed to have been in preparation for this — entering the Faculty of Arts and Social Science, majoring in English Language. The recession perhaps only helped curb an insane desire to get a better paying job.

The economy is still in turmoil and it will be for a while more. However, Jeremiah 29:11 reminds graduating students like myself, that the plans set by God are already in motion. If I were to get or have anything, it is only by the grace of God. No amount of worry would have comforted me more than the verse could. With this verse, I know my direction has been set out before me.

All I need now is to take the steps, no matter how illogical they may seem to the world.

BY ALVIN CHUA

The economy is still in turmoil and it will be for a while more. However, Jeremiah

29:11 reminds graduating students like myself, that the plans set by God are already in motion.

As unemployment numbers surge, this might seem the worst time to graduate. Or is it? Our columnist offers a different perspective.

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.

Matthew 11: 28

Small Steps, Giant Leap

TRIED A DIFFERENT KINDOF AID?

OUR CORPORATE TIME OF PRAYEREvERY WEDNESDAY, 8PMBasement rooms 3 and 4

ALDERSGATE FIRE PLACE


LIFEsTORY

iT WAS LIfE as usual as I headed off for work on the morning of 26th September 2008. Nothing, however, prepared me for what entailed in the

coming weeks. Since 2000, I have experienced

occasional bouts of chest pain and breathlessness. Thinking that they were heart-related, my doctor ordered an X-Ray and electrocardiogram to be taken. Nothing abnormal was detected and I was given a clean bill of health. While the symptoms persisted when I entered the army and even surfaced during my overseas mission trips, several checkups churned out the same normal outcome. I was even referred to a cardiologist when I was working in Tan Tock Seng Hospital.

That Friday morning when I arrived at the office, the same sharp pain pierced my chest and I had difficulty breathing. As I usually recover within half a day, I brushed it off and continued with my work. When the pain did not subside the following day, I visited the Polyclinic again and went for the same procedures. This time, my X-Ray was blurred.

Plainly, I was told that my left lung had collapsed. In medical terms, it was Pneumothorax, an emergency condition caused by the accumulation of gas in the pleural cavity. I was immediately admitted into the hospital and given local anaesthesia in order to insert a tube into the left side of my chest. The tube sucked and pumped out gas from my body into a chest tank. The procedure caused me several sleepless nights, and dragging the tank around with me was also a hassle.

The doctor monitored my condition over a week and

My Jehovah Rophe

results fluctuated. The presence of gas remaining in my chest prompted him to increase the suction speed of the tank. Undoubtedly, this move created much pain and I endured yet another sleepless night.

The next morning, I was informed that surgery would be required if my condition did not improve. The thought of surgery filled me with dread.

Miraculously, my X-Ray scan on 8th October was completely normal. I was cleared and discharged. What a relief!

I thank God for walking me through it all. Had this episode not happened, I would not have found out the real cause to my chest pains. He was also my Primary Healer as the doctors did not do much to help me with the recovery. I was not even prescribed any medication.

Through this hospitalisation, I had the chance to fast from my computer and television programmes, living away from the calls of this world. I learnt that everything works in God’s time. My life had been moving at a very rapid pace, accumulating stress

along the way. This incident reminded me to slow down and dwell in what matters.

Finally, I also thank God for my friends’ prayers, blessings and concern. Whenever they came to visit me, I felt incomprehensible peace and joy in my heart. The pain in my chest would also subside. God’s mercy has been evident in this entire episode.

BY HENRY TAN

Through this hospitalisation,

I had the chance to fast from my computer and television programmes,

living away from the calls of this world. I learnt that

everything works in God’s time.

Doctors said he needed surgery after his left lung collapsed. But the next day, he was given a clean bill of health.


FAMILY DAY@ SENTOSA

All are invited

27 June 2009Saturday, 9am onwardsTanjong BeachLook out for more details inthe bulletin or check www.aldersgate.sg

Aldersgate celebrates 30 years

travelling

Our family vacation last December was initially planned with more people in mind, but due to busy schedules and other commitments, we finally settled on what would be our first “sisters only” trip, something Rowena and I had wanted to

do since a while back. However, like most siblings, we do have our share of frequent bickering at home, and while people generally tend to be more accommodating when travelling with friends, doing so with your sibling – someone you are used to taking for granted many a times – could be quite a different experience.

with my sisterSheena Yang explains how she toured Taiwan with her sister based on “three-favours- a day”

TRAVEL TALEs


thrEE FAVoUrs A DAYKeenly aware of this challenge, my younger sis and I actually sat down for a pre-trip discussion on how we would resolve conflicts that might arise during the trip. This was definitely a good idea, considering how we already argued over how we’d settle our arguments! Our resolution was that each of us would give in to, or “tolerate” if you will, three favours per day from the other person – however unreasonable those requests may be – during our travel together.

CrAZY oVEr bEEF broth rAMEnOurs was an 8-day free-and-easy trip to Taiwan. Our hotel in Taipei City was right smack in the middle of Ximending, a famous shopping hotspot dotted with huge department stores, swanky shops and street vendors. This did a lot of damage to our pockets as we practically spent all our time there shopping and eating. The wintry

weather did not help either because as I discovered, a person’s appetite tends to increase when one is cold.

Dubbed the “Harajuku” of Taipei, Ximending is a popular hangout for young people. Here, you can find anything from trendy clothes, shoes, and accessories to CDs, books and souvenirs; from movie museums, theatres and karaoke pubs to restaurants, eateries and street stalls selling local snacks. The night markets in Taipei are a must-go. All the mouth-watering local foods and snacks are available here. Yummy favourites such as Taiwanese fried pancakes (a thicker version of our Roti Prata with fillings), crispy fried chicken chop, seasoned maize on a stick, beef broth ramen and so many more were simply too tempting to pass up. (Travel tip: resist big portions as you’d need the stomach space to sample the wide variety of scrumptious delights).

Rowena was so crazy over the beef

broth ramen that we consumed it five days in a row for breakfast. I had no choice but go along because she used her daily entitlement of “favours” on me each time. The Taiwanese themselves frequent the night markets and during the weekend especially, much of our time was spent queuing up with the locals for food. Every night, we’d return to the hotel and just collapse on our beds, totally exhausted but contented.

rEFrEshED bY hotsPrinGsFrom Taipei, we travelled south to visit Sun Moon Lake, a popular tourist attraction in Taichung. It was a good break away from the hustle and bustle of Taipei City. On the

recommendation of our homestay host family, we woke up bright and early before dawn to settle by the lake and enjoy the peace and serenity of the surrounding. The scenery was breathtaking as the sun revealed itself slowly, casting a lovely glow upon the glistening lake. In stillness we sat, marvelling at this beautiful sight before us. I gave thanks for the opportunity to witness God’s majestic glory and also for this time of quietness that was much needed. The air was remarkably fresh and the weather so perfect that we even went trekking on the trails. We felt so refreshed and healthy after that! The hot springs we visited later helped to soothe our slightly aching muscles.

Throughout this time together, I was thankful that my sister and I did not have any major arguments even though this was something rather common on previous holidays. Minor disagreements, such as one person’s desire for midnight shopping while

the other preferred hitting the sack, were quickly resolved – just like the beef broth ramen episode – through our “three favours-a-day” pact made before the trip. I thank God for giving me wisdom to know when to hold my tongue and when to give in. It was a trip we both thoroughly enjoyed and it certainly brought us closer together as sisters. In fact, I’d say I look forward to more holidays with Rowena!

Rowena was so crazy over the beef broth ramen that we consumed it five days in a row for breakfast. I

had no choice but go along because she used her daily

entitlement of “favours” on me each time.


seemed like the norm. Our team also visited two

village schools to bless the local schoolchildren via creative outreach and interactive games. We also delivered clothings and other forms of aid to the villagers, because the people there still live in relative poverty. Due to the ravages of the Vietnam War, during which numerous Laotians died, 45 per cent of the population is under 15 years old. This explains the disproportionate number of children compared with adults in the country. Statistically, Laos is the poorest country in the region, and this was painfully evident to us. Some of the children we encountered, for example, had no shoes and wore clothes that were much too big for them. Our simple gifts of biscuits and hair ribbons, which had cost us so little, were met with child-like contentment that really touched my heart. I was personally

As part of my TRACKERS discipleship programme held between January and March this year, I embarked on a 10-day

mission trip to Laos. Our team, comprising nine youths and two mentors from various local Methodist churches, visited three destinations within Laos, namely Oudomxay, Luang Prabang and Vientiane.

After weeks of preparation and seeking God’s discernment for the team’s ministry in Laos, we finally started on our great adventure on the night of Feb 16. For many of us, this was our first mission trip experience, and needless to say, we were tremendously excited.

As there was no direct flight to Laos, we had to transit in Kuala Lumpur where we spent the night in sleeping bags on the airport floor. This was not the most comfortable of accommodation, but it was a small price to pay for the profound

disturbed by the stark disparity between the children in Laos and those back home, as I recalled a scene I witnessed just before I left for my trip — that of a young boy throwing a frightful tantrum, simply because his mother did not accede to his demand for a toy car.

My mission team also travelled to Luang Prabang, which is a UNESCO World Heritage site and is famous for its many historic Buddhist temples and tourist attractions. Due to the limits on ministry resulting from the government’s anti-Christian stance, the team’s only form of ministry was confined to prayer walks around the city. Even then, we were told to be wary and to pray with

experiences we had in Laos.Upon arrival at Vientiane, we had to

make another transfer to Oudomxay, the heart of northern Laos. This time however, the hour-long flight was onboard a tiny, slightly claustrophobic propeller plane that resembled those of bygone eras. We made it there safe and sound though.

Our team stayed with our Laos-based missionary contact from Youth With A Mission, in the school set up years ago. For security reasons, we were instructed not to divulge names or release any photographs of the missionary upon our return to Singapore. Laos is a closed communist country, steeped in Buddhism and animistic beliefs. The strict prohibition of evangelism makes it difficult for Christians to minister to the people there. Even missionaries who reside in the country usually go under the cover of another profession. These manifold challenges facing Christian ministries in Laos means

we had to be extra careful and sensitive to the people we encountered, especially at the immigrations.

Our ministry with the missionary consisted mainly of helming nightly, covertly held prayer meetings as well as ministering to the missionary and eight disciples via dance, skits, testimony sharing and a one-day workshop that we conducted for them. During our stay, we were given the opportunity to bless our hosts by cooking meals for them. This entailed a trip to the wet market, which is similar to those back home… with the exception of a lot more raw meat on display, including bags of pig’s blood, entrails and pig heads. I got a slight culture shock when the butcher returned our change by placing the kip (Laos currency) directly on top of the slabs of raw meat which still had traces of blood on them. In squeaky clean Singapore, this practice would have garnered wide-eyed stares; over there, it

Truly, Laos is a beautiful country, but also one that elicits much sadness. After the Vietnam War, Laos was said to be more heavily bombed than the whole of Europe during World War Two

CloCKWisE FroM toP lEFt: The Patuxay (meaning Victory Gate) in Vientiane is dedicated to those who fought in the struggle for independence from France; Villagers’ houses in Mai Village, in Oudomxay; A roadside vendor near a wet market in Oudomxay; Our mission team with some of the Laotian disciples we ministered to; Rickety bridge spanning across a tributary of the Mekong River.the jewel of the

MEKONGLAOS

TRAVEL TALEs

BY BEVERLY ANG


our eyes open so as not to draw unwanted attention to ourselves. Some of us – myself included – had a strong sense of spiritual oppression and ongoing spiritual warfare as we walked around the temples, but we battled these feelings by repeatedly claiming the name of Jesus and establishing His throne in this predominantly Buddhist city.

Our final destination was the Laotian capital of Vientiane, where we had the opportunity to interact with the Singapore Ambassador to Laos and learn about the challenges facing Laos as a country. Interestingly, we were told that all Vientiane-based Singaporeans gathered every last Friday of the month to fellowship at Novotel, which is a Singaporean-owed hotel.

Truly, Laos is a beautiful country, but also one that elicits much sadness. After the Vietnam War, Laos was said to be “more heavily bombed than the whole of Europe during WWII”; many artillery shells remain undetonated, even to this day!

The country is also largely “forgotten” by the rest of the world, I mean, how many

times have we seen Laos mentioned in the newspaper, if ever? In my mind, there is a real need for the gospel to be brought to this country because the natives are living in spiritual bondage.

What struck me most was that many of the Laotians appear to live without any hope for the future. Our team’s call from God was to bring hope to these people, and to love them with the love of Christ. On a personal level, God burdened my heart with Isaiah 61:1-3; in particular, to “bind up the brokenhearted” and “provide for those who grieve in Zion – to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair.” I dare say we fulfilled God’s vision for us, and in turn, we were richly blessed as well. Meeting the missionary was the highlight of the trip for many of us, especially when she shared her incredible testimony with us. Even though some time has passed since my mission trip, Laos still holds a special place in my heart.

FroM lEFt: Some of the pupils in a spartan classroom at the Mai Village School; Being a UNESCO World Heritage Site, Luang Prabang has many such restaurants and guesthouses catering to tourists.

Laos, one of the world’s few remaining communist states, is one of east Asia’s poorest countries. Since the collapse of the Soviet Union in 1991 it has struggled to find its position within a changing political and economic landscape.

Communist forces overthrew the monarchy in 1975, heralding years of isolation. Laos began opening up to the world in the 1990s, but despite tentative reforms, it remains poor and dependent on international donations.

PolitiCs: Ruling communists maintain a monopoly of political power.EConoMY: One of the world’s poorest nations, Laos has little domestic industry and relies on foreign aid; hopes are pinned on a hydroelectric project.intErnAtionAl: Its communist regime is backed by China and Vietnam.- soUrCE: bbC WEbsitE

fact box

ALL ACCEss

CDs are available at SKS Warehouse. Please call 6227 9700 for enquiries.

SOngS THaT CHangED THE CHuRCH - HYMnSVARIOUS ARTISTS

This is a compilation of some of our all-time favourite hymns that played a significant part in the way we as a church express our worship to God in song. Among these are hymns such as Amazing Grace, Be Thou My Vision, Great Is Thy Faithfulness, and you will find the remaining tracks very familiar as well. These timeless hymns are performed by some of Christian music’s most popular artists. It brings out how the church has grown through cultural changes and yet still keeping true to the rich biblical truths these hymns carry and to the good news of the gospel.

WoW hits 2009 VARIOUS ARTISTS

This double-CD album needs no introduction.

It’s an annual release of the best hits Christian radio has to offer in the past year. Among the track listings are regulars such as Chris Tomlin and Switchfoot. Be sure to also check out several noteworthy and upcoming artiste such as soft-rockers Tenth Avenue North with Love Is Here and Jazz/R&B artist Brandon Heath with Give Me Your Eyes. Track for track, it may not be as memorable as previous WOW Hits, but nevertheless, its still the album to go for if you want quick access to the best hits the last year has to offer.

MUSIC

THIS MOMENTSteven Curtis Chapman

HE’S ONE of Christian music’s veterans and he’s back with a new album after some three years. This album has a message about enjoying and experiencing God in the present moment and it’s most clearly brought out in the title track Miracle of the Moment. Like other veterans such as Michael W. Smith, the challenge for Steven is keeping true to his style while keeping relevant to current musical tastes and Steven has done a pretty decent job at this, adding a lot more rock to his usual pop style. On the tracks Broken and With One Voice, it even sounds like a cross between Chris Tomlin and Switchfoot. Also, one of his trademarks is the rich and meaningful lyrics. This album surely doesn’t disappoint.

BY ERIC CHIOK

ERIC’sCHOICE

Steven Curtis Chapman


ALL ACCEss ALL ACCEss

THE CULTURE-WISE FAMILyAUTHOR TEd BaEHr & PaT BoonEPUBLIsHER rEGal BooKs

This is a book for parents who want to raise their children to make wise choices concerning the mass media and entertainment that is rife in society today. Written by Ted Baehr (noted movie critic, educator, lecturer and media pundit) and Pat Boone (a popular singer in the 50s and 60s), this work offers practical advice on the world of the mass media and how it affects the Christian family.

BECOMING A WORLD-CHANGING FAMILyAUTHOR donna THomasPUBLIsHER yWam PUBlisHinG

An activity-packed book that will guide and encourage you to lead a family that is focused on one of the most important tasks of a Christian - fulfilling the Great Commission. from dinner invitations, picnics, writing letters, taking trips, playing games, and many more - author Donna Thomas will share with you the many possibilities of sharing the Gospel through your family!

NO PERFECT PEOPLE ALLOWEDAUTHOR JoHn BUrKEPUBLIsHER ZondErVan CorPoraTion

This is a powerful book that is written for this generation and culture in mind - the post-modern and perhaps even the post-Christian generation. Attempting to break down the 5 main barriers to authentic church community (namely the lack of trust, intolerance, falsehood, brokenness and aloneness), author and pastor John Burke shares why creating a culture of dialogue, authenticity, acceptance, truth, hope and connection can help your church connect deeply with today’s generation.

Books are available at SKS Warehouse. Please call 6227 9700 for enquiries.

BOOKS TECHBY sKs BOOKs BY GORDON YUEN

A RENEWED& REFURBISHEDWEBSITEwww.aldersgate.sg

WORSHIPPING WITH AMC since November 2007 and through the ministry of the weekly teachings (and Biblical admonishments), I had come to grow in the Lord, having consciously and deliberately walked away from Him for several years. That period of relationship renewal with God brought about a quiet desire to serve Him in a tangible way with the talents He had given. Thus began the re-building of the AMC website in Nov 2008. At the same time, through God’s Grace, He ministered to me and gave me the opportunity to re-build my own life as well. Crafting the site led to many, wonderful hours conversing with God, through reading His Word and prayerful considerations for the overall design, layout and concept.

Today, the site has many pages. They each tell a different story - of the people and the lives in AMC. More website features will be added in the coming weeks and months. Like trees that bear the rings of time in their trunks, I hope that the AMC website will leave an ongoing history of the sights and sounds of the life of the church, its people and more importantly our walks with God.

ViDEos oF WEEKlY sErMonsEdited, uploaded and ready for viewing by 2am the following day after any sermon

WEEKlY PrAYErs Uploaded every Friday night for the following Sunday’s services

liVElinEWorking on having every published issue available online

GAllErY Showcasing hundreds of photos of events held by various AMC ministries

bloGDirect posting of blog entries and comments through emails, for anyone to share news and other activities of the church

MYAMCLatest feature – providing a rich media community platform for members to create individual pages and content to share and grow their online experiences with young and old members and friends of the church.

CHOKED WITH FEATURES


Aldergate’s recipes from the heart

From Florence Ang

GLUTINOUS RICE (SERVE HOT)1 kg glutinous rice, wash & soak for 3 hours 8 cloves garlic, finely chopped 250g dried prawns, wash & drain 250g dried Chinese black mushrooms, cut into small cube & soak till soft 3 tbsp light soya sauce 3 tbsp black dark soya sauce 1 tbsp pepper 2 tsp salt 1 tsp five spice powder GARNISHING30 pcs shallots, finely sliced & fry till golden brown3 red chilli, sliced into strips 8 stalks spring onion, cut thinly METHOD 1. Fry garlic over medium heat. Add dried prawns, mushroom, light & dark soya sauce, pepper, salt, five spice powder and fry for 25 minutes until fragrant 2. Turn off heat. Add glutinous

rice, mix and blend well 3. Transfer mixture into a steamer tray and steam for 1 hour. Allow rice to cool 4. Garnish with fried shallots, red chilli strips and sliced spring onion. Serve

From Chan Chui Foong

DRY MEE SIAM 1 pkt Beehoon I bottle ready-made mee siam pasteBean sprouts (a handful or more if preferred) Chives (koo chye), cut to 2cm long 2 cups of dried shrimp, chopped coarselyDried bean curd (tau pok), cut into strips 1 onion, chopped coarsely3 tbsp of tamarind or lime juice 1 tsp sugar Salt, to tasteMETHOD 1. Scald beehoon and set aside 2. Parboil bean sprouts & chives.

3. Heat oil, fry dried shrimps and set aside 4. Heat oil, sauté onions until soft, add mee siam paste5. Stir in fried dried shrimps, tamarind or lime juice, sugar and salt 6. Add beehoon, bean sprouts, chives and dried bean curd. Mix thoroughly. 7. Garnish with hard boiled egg and prawn (optional)

From Chan Chui Foong

YAM COINS1 kg yam root2 cups tapioca flour 7 tbsp peanut cooking oil 4 cloves garlic, finely chopped300g minced pork50g dried cuttlefish strips 50g mushroom strips 50g dried shrimps Pepper Fish sauce (to taste if preferred/optional) Spring onion, cut into 2cm longChinese parsley

PREPARATION1. Pare yam root. Handle with plastic gloves. Sap may cause itchiness

2. Cut yam 1cm thick, crosswise3. Steam yam for 30 minutes, or until soft 4. Put yam in mixing bowl, add tapioca flour and knead to a fine paste5. Roll paste to a 2.5cm ball and press lightly in the middle. Set aside6. Bring water to boil and place yam coins into boiling water7. When cooked, yam coins will rise to the top8. Remove and immerse into cold water for about 10 mins9. Remove and mix with some oil to prevent yam coins from sticking together. Set aside

COOKING1. Soak cuttlefish, mushrooms and dried shrimps separately. Drain2. Heat oil in work, fry garlic until fragrant3. Add minced pork, cuttlefish, mushroom and dried shrimps4. Stir fry and add in cooked yam coins and fry for a further 5 minutes.5. Add a dash of pepper. Remove Garnish with spring onion and parsley. Serve

Lobang BY LESLIE CHIANG

JUNE 0921.06 fathers’ Day

24.06 LCEC Meeting

27.06 family Day

29.06PCG Leaders’ Quarterly Meeting

JULY 0905.07 Youth Sunday

19.07 Church Conference

31.07Prayer & Praise

AUGUST 0928.08 Methodist Schools’ Staff Get-Together

METHODIST WELFARE SERvICES GOLF TOURNAMENT

FELLOWSHIP ON THE GREENS

29.07JULY 09

HIGHLIGHT

tAnAh MErAh CoUntrY ClUb (tAMPinEs CoUrsE)

Through this annual charity golf event, the MWS hopes to raise $300,000 to help the terminally ill, elderly poor, homeless, needy families and at-risk children and youth. Read more at www.mws.org.sg

Guest of honour: Dr Vivian Balakrishnan, Minister for Community Development, Youth and Sports.

ALL ACCEss

LOBANGSBY GERALDINE ANG

As our church celebrates 30 years of God’s blessings, LiveLine managed to gather some of

Aldergate Methodist Church’s chefs to share their favourite recipes with us. Enjoy them!

UPCOMINGEvENTS

see www.aldersgate.sg for more updates


Go to www.aldersgate.sg for more recipes!

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LIVELINE Issue 11