Linda Loman’s Diary

Written by Yea Uen Park

May 22, 1921

Debts are piling up. My husband, Willy Loman, is trying his best to earn more money, but it’s not enough. I know it’s hard. Being a salesman is not a easy job. I believe my husband is doing well.

However we still need more money... The bathroom faucet is broken again and the refrigerator doesn’t work well. Both need to be repaired. Also, the roof is so old that water leaks from it. I’d like to replace the entire roof if I can.

Today Willy gave me $60, which is not bad. Actually this is a better amount than before. However his salary is irregular so I can not stop worrying

I just hope Biff and Happy grow up fast and help their father.

October 29, 1934

The weather is getting colder. Now hanging wet clothes outside to dry is a really bad idea.

I guess this winter will come soon.

To prepare winter I searched for my old stockings which Willy gave me almost two years ago.

I found it inside of the dark-brown wooden wardrobe. It was covered with dust and had many holes. It seemed impossible to wear …

Does he know I need new stockings? … … I believe he will bring one back for me from his trip to Boston…

I just want to believe that…

I will mend the old pair of stockings again. This time I will mend them so perfectly that they will seem brand new.

I wish Willy doesn’t get cold in the Boston.

October 30, 1934

My son, Biff looked pale and sick today. However, I did not worry about it too much because I knew he visited Boston to meet his father and discuss math problem and graduation. So I figured it was just travel sickness.

However in the morning, Biff walked home feebly, like a dead person. Happy and I were shocked when we saw him. His pupils weren’t focused.

I wonder what happened to Willy and Biff, but I couldn’t ask any questions. Biff didn’t seem to want to talk about happened between him and his father.

I just let him go upstairs to his room and made some warm vegetable soup for him.

The argument between Willy and Biff seemed serious this time. It was different from other arguments.

I haven’t said it yet, but I think Biff should apologize to his father for whatever he did.

Willy is a poor man who works hard for his family, especially for his two sons.

So Biff and Happy should be polite to their father and try to understand him.

November 3, 1936

Biff left home leaving only a letter on his bed. I couldn’t believe it. How could Biff, a boy who loves his family so much, leave his family without saying goodbye!?

Everything changed after Biff came home from Boston. Willy and Biff never said anything to each other again. It seemed like both were trying to avoid each other.

Willy did not say anything, but I could feel he was disappointed in Biff. This condition only made Willy’s temper worse than before.

I still don’t know what ruined Willy and Biff’s good father-son relationship, but I could guess that something bad happened in Boston.

I will not ask Willy any questions until he comes and tells me the truth.

A letter I received from Biff.

Dear, Mom

I’m going west.

Do not ask me why and do not ask me to change my mind. Please respect my decision. This is something I need to do as an adult.

I need to get out of the city and go somewhere in order to get a new perspective on things.

I will send you letters as often as I can. Don’t worry about me. Take care of yourself.

Love your son,

Biff

January 25, 1943

Oh my god!

I just found out that Willy tried to commit suicide. Last month there was a car crash which I simply thought was an accident. But the policeman said it was planed by Willy. He tried to kill himself!

How could he have done this! What made him think to attempt suicide?

Oh, my poor Willy…

I also found the gas turned on under the basement… I didn’t tell him yet, but … in fact I don’t know what to do… How can I deal with this problem!?

Oh, I miss Biff… If he were in the house, maybe he could stop Willy from planning suicide… Where are you son?

December 21, 1949

Nobody came to my husband’s funeral except his only friend, Charley. Where are all the people that Willy mentioned before? Do they even know that he is dead…?

People said my husband, Willy, was a crazy old man who only liked money. Maybe people were right because Willy spoke to himself a lot and he really liked money. But he was a great husband and father to our children.

He worked hard to earn money for all of us. He never gave up! I felt proud of my husband and hope Willy went to heaven and is at peace there.

The last present that he gave us was his insurance. Our family could finally afford to pay off all the debts with his insurance money… Even the house rent, too.

I still can’t believe that Willy is gone. To me it feels like he just went on another business trip.