November 1, 2016

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orner B u l l y - B u s t i n g C u r r i c u l u m—

L e s s o n s T h r e e & F o u r :

I -Messages & Te l l i ng vs . Ta t t l i ng

DP students with character know the difference between telling and tattling. Telling is often a good choice. Students are encouraged to tell if someone is being hurt either physically or emotionally. Telling is helping someone get OUT of trouble. Tattling is a negative behavior. When tattling, the goal is to get someone IN to trouble. Tonight at dinner, ask your children to tell you the difference between telling & tattling!

Students practiced an important skill: “I-Messages”. It has nothing to

do with technology, but everything to do with effective communication.

It is important for words to be chosen carefully in order to avoid

escalating a conflict. When your child experiences a conflict with

another student, they should use an “I-message” in an effort to

resolve it peacefully.

You messages such as, “You

told my secret!” tend to escalate

conflict. On the other hand,

“I-messages” are objective; for

example, “I feel embarrassed

that my secret was told because

you betrayed my trust. I want

you to be a trustworthy friend.”

Tonight at dinner, ask your child

to use an “I-message”!

It is our mission to foster

students' character

development in a caring

and developmentally-

appropriate manner that

engages the students, the

staff, and the community in

activities that promote

responsibility. The

comprehensive school

counseling program is an

integral part of Rumson’s

educational system: All

district employees are

concerned with the whole

child and recognize the

uniqueness and personal

worth of each child. The

personnel providing

counseling services are

alert to the multiple

dimensions of the child and

view her/him as an

individual – a unique human

being endowed with dignity

and worthy of respect.

DP’S COUNSELING

MISSION

“The best way to cheer yourself up

is to try and cheer somebody

else up!”

-Mark Twain

Attendance Being in school every day means your child won’t miss out on

learning. Try to schedule appointments and family trips outside of

school hours. If they ask to stay home “just because” remind

them of what they will miss, such as reading group or art class.

Explain that one can only be absent if they are sick of if there is a

family emergency. Also, school is not a choice!

Celebrate Success Suggest that your youngster create a fun reminder of all the things he or she

has accomplished. Let your child(ren) cover a container with construction

paper and label it, “I did it!” Then, they can write each success

(“I memorized my times tables”) on a slip of paper and put it in the container.

If your child(ren) is feeling discouraged, read the slips.

https://charactercounts.org/

http://www.education.com/static/ebook/education-com-bullying-ebook.pdf

http://kidshealth.org/parent/emotions/feelings/bully-proof.html

http://kidshealth.org/parent/emotions/feelings/tolerance.html#

http://www.nasponline.org/resources/crisis_safety/talkingviolence.pdf

C a l m i n g D o w n T i p s

A n t i - V i o l e n c e w e b s i t e s f o r P a r e n t s

What is HIB? Harassment, Intimidation, and Bullying

Why do I need to know about HIB? New Jersey passed the Anti-Bullying Bill of Rights Act in 2010.

http://www.njleg.state.nj.us/2010/Bills/PL10/122_.PDF

What is the process if I feel my child is being bullied? There is a reporting form available on the school website. However, if you are unsure, call your school counselor. If a report is filed, there is a 10 day investigation in which all parties involved will be questioned. The Anti-Bullying

Specialist reports the results of the investigation to the Superintendent. Names are not used but the results are reported to the Board of Education. 5 days after the results of the investigation are reported to the Board of

Education, parents of the students who are parties to the investigation shall be provided in writing if HIB occurred.

What is the threshold for HIB? In short...In order to be deemed HIB, all THREE of the following criteria needs to be met: it needs to have happened

because of a perceived characteristic like race, color, religion, sexual orientation, etc. It needs to have occurred on or off school grounds, AND substantially disrupts with the operation of school/the rights of others. In addition, ONE of

the following has to be present: the person knows it is harmful, has the effect of being insulting, OR creates a hostile environment.

For a full definition and explanation go to http://www.nj.gov/education/students/safety/behavior/hib/ .

What if it looks like the school is not doing anything about it? A child may not have crossed the threshold for HIB according to the law, but that does not mean that they have not violated student code of conduct. Due to confidentiality, we are not able to discuss discipline of a child other

than your own. Consequences take many forms. To change behavior, we feel it is just as important to teach responsibility and pro-social behaviors.

T h e I m p o r t a n c e o f H . I . B.

C h a r a c t e r C o u n t s : O u r P r o m i s e

On Monday, October 17, 2016, the Social Emotional Learning Committee hosted the first Parent Academy Session to review the Anti-Bullying Bill of Rights, understand bullying vs. normal conflict, and identify at-risk behaviors. Here is a link to the presentation:

Parent Academy Presentation 10/17/16

It is our mission to foster

students' character

development in a caring

and developmentally-

appropriate manner that

engages the students, the

staff, and the community in

activities that promote

responsibility. The

comprehensive school

counseling program is an

integral part of Rumson’s

educational system: All

district employees are

concerned with the whole

child and recognize the

uniqueness and personal

worth of each child. The

personnel providing

counseling services are

alert to the multiple

dimensions of the child and

view her/him as an

individual – a unique human

being endowed with dignity

and worthy of respect.

DP’S COUNSELING

MISSION

R e a d y, S e t , P re t e n d !

No matter how old your youngster is, pretending can boost their creativity and teach them to think abstractly. Try these activities:

Ask your child to close their eyes and imagine being a person they studied (explorer, inventor) or that they are visiting a place learned about (White House, rain forest). Encourage children to describe what they see, hear, and smell. In the rain forest, for example, they might see colorful birds, hear monkeys howling, and smell damp leaves.

Pick a random object (sponge). Have each family member list creative uses for it (pincushion, hamster tumbling mat, ice pack). After three minutes, compare your lists. The person with the most ideas gets to pick the next time.

Wouldn't it be terrible? Wouldn't it

be sad? If just one color was

the color that we had? If everything was purple? Or red?

Or blue? Or green? If yellow, pink,

or orange was all that could be seen?

Can you imagine just how dull the world

would be If just one single color was all we got to see?

Parent Academy Session #2! Please join us on:

Monday, December 12, 2016

at 7 P.M. in the Forrestdale Media Center

December’s topic is: College & Career Readiness for 21st Century Learners

We look forward to seeing you!

O c t o b e r wa s a B u s y M o n t h !

Week of Respect Mrs. Wagner, Music Teacher, taught all students the “Respect

Song” to respect oneself, others, and the school community PTO sponsored assembly: “The Right Choice” by Camfel Productions Write letters on National Custodian’s Day to our own custodians Mrs. Piernik came into all lunches to show videos promoting

respect, discussed the importance of being kind to one another, and reviewed the HIB policy with students + MORE! Anti-Violence Awareness Week (Peace Week)

Officer Dougherty from the Rumson Police Department discussed ways to be safe and provided Halloween Safety Tips!

Many great morning meeting activities—ask your child for details! Fire Safety Month

Volunteers from the Rumson Fire Department came to show DP students what’s on and inside a fire truck, show them what firefighters look like and sound like during a fire, as well as discuss safety tips such as Stop, Drop, and Roll. Thank you to Captain Luiten, Mr. Bradley, Mr. Berry, Mr. Eyerkuss, and all the volunteer firefighters!