Killing Me Softly - September 2006 Pacific Mediation Resolving Team & Staff Conflict

Killing Me Softly - September 2006 Pacific Mediation

Resolving Team & Staff

Conflict


What is Conflict?What is Conflict?

Conflict occurs as a result of a perceived divergence of interest, or a belief that the current parties aspirations cannot be met simultaneously (Rubin,Pruitt & Kim, 1994)


Types of ConflictTypes of Conflict

Substantive • Facts

Procedural •Way situation has been handled

Psychological•Impact on feelings


Some Common Causes Some Common Causes of Conflictof Conflict

Relationships

Interests

Communications

Value differencesDiffering

Perceptions

• Emotional Issues

• Resource Competition

• Differing Goals

• Personality Clash

• Management Styles

Conflict Escalation


Responses to ConflictResponses to Conflict

Do Nothing (Live with it!)

Negotiate Mediate Formal Investigation/Enquiry Arbitrate / Litigate


Personality TypesPersonality Types

Turtles

Teddy Bears

Foxes

Owls

Sharks


Perceptual PositionsPerceptual PositionsWalking, Seeing, Hearing, Thinking, Feeling, BelievingWalking, Seeing, Hearing, Thinking, Feeling, Believing

1st PersonFrom my perspective

– Impact on ME– How I see things– How I feel


Perceptual PositionsPerceptual PositionsWalking, Seeing, Hearing, Thinking, Feeling, BelievingWalking, Seeing, Hearing, Thinking, Feeling, Believing

2nd Personfrom their perspective

– Impact on them– How they see things– How they feel


Perceptual Positions Perceptual Positions

3rd Person– Observers View– Impartial position– Helicopter


Negotiation StylesNegotiation Styles

Power Based Strikes, Sanctions, War

Rights Based Courts, Adjudication, Arbitration

Interest Based Mediation, Negotiation


Power BasedPower Based

Win / Lose outcome Total lack of trust Focus on differences Damages relationships Outcome unsatisfactory for one/both Costly


Rights BasedRights Based Third party decision Law/precedent based Uncertain outcomes High cost

$$$, and Emotions/Stress Time

Relationship deterioration


Interest BasedInterest Based Issue identification Interests

– Wants, needs– Fears, concerns

Mutual respect Flexibility Protects relationships Outcome more sustainable


Resolution StylesResolution Styles

Interest Based1

Mediation

Rights Based

Adjudication - Arbitration

Power Based

Strikes - War

Low

COST

High

LIKLIHOOD of

SATISFACTORYOUTCOME

Low

High


Questions?Questions?

Do you think this dispute will still be going on in ………?

If there were two methods of resolving disputes


Key Skills - QuestioningKey Skills - Questioning

Closed questions invite Yes/No End the exchange

Open questions begin with:–How, What, When, Where, Who…–Tell me about …–How do you feel about? ...


Key Skills - ListeningKey Skills - Listening

A skill that can be learned and improved

What do good listeners do?

What are the impacts of good listening


Key Skills - Reflective ListeningKey Skills - Reflective Listening Reflective Listening is “Active”

Words, Intonation, Body Concentration & Focus - Two Way Multi level Attitude as well as skills

Paraphrase facts and feelings Clarify with open questions Validate feelings - From THEIR point of view


Key Skills - ReframingKey Skills - ReframingBe 'hard' on the issues, but 'soft' on the person.

Move from : Person to Problem Positions to Interests Past to Future

Neutral language and “I” statementsDescribe the speakers feelings, not the other

persons character/action


Negotiating AgreementNegotiating Agreement

Focus moves from past to present and futureLooking for settlement options

– Challenge to take responsibility– “What do you think would be the best outcome for everyone?

– “What do you feel you could do to move negotiations along?”

How the parties feel about the others point of view

Looking for common ground


What is Mediation?What is Mediation?

Impartial 3rd Party

Facilitated discussion

Parties in control

Parties work to THEIR solution


How is Mediation different?How is Mediation different?

Expectations– Win / Loss

Hostility Equity over Law Flexibility Formality Parties retain Control


Benefits of MediationBenefits of Mediation

Far less costly Interest Based Preserves relationships Quick Less formal Flexible Participants in Control Increased chance of procedural fairness


Role of MediatorRole of Mediator

Responsible for ProcessFacilitates discussionImpartialReal empathyEmpoweringAssertive


Settlement AgreementsSettlement Agreements

WHO

agrees

to doWHAT WHEN


““Blessed are the Peacemakers”Blessed are the Peacemakers”

Good Luck

If we can help please contact us

Pacific [email protected]

Tel: 9855 0855

Documents

Killing Me Softly - September 2006 Pacific Mediation Resolving Team & Staff Conflict