June July 2006 - Performance in Motion

CANADIAN PUBLICATIONS MAIL PRODUCT SALES AGREEMENT #40609642

June/July 2006 • Volume 6 • Issue 4 • $3.95 Canadian

Inside: KEEP YOUR COOL THIS SUMMER!

Editorial ..............................................5Letters to the Editor ..........................7Keep Cool this Summer! ..................8 So Fine Top-Hiding ‘59 ....................10350Z Turbo Install ............................12

Performane Engine ............................16Coming Soon: Rat Fink Movie! .......18Pantera ................................................23Stratford Motor Products Cruise ....24Performance Killing Smog Parts? ...26

Advanced Fuel Economy ..................30New Product Showcase .....................32Motorcycle Hall of Fame ..................34Book Review: Paint your Car ...........36Reluctant Passenger ..........................38

Contents June/July

On the Cover Joe Kwakernaak’s 1959 Ford Skyliner. See story, page 10.

Editorial

P|M • June/July 2006 5

Why are we living in fear of unfriendly oil producers and increased gas prices, when there appears to be a “Made

in North America” solution on the horizon?With the high cost of gasoline there is a re-

newed interest in alternative fuels. 60 Minutes had a segment on the making of corn-based ethanol. It caught my attention and caused me to do some research on a very viable alternative to gasoline.

Ethanol is made from renewable crops such as corn, readily available in both the U.S. and Canada. By converting to ethanol power we would no longer be dependant on foreign oil imports and the see-saw pricing structure of a barrel of oil would no longer be constantly hanging over our heads. Currently, in the US there are 83 plants refi ning ethanol, with 16 more under construction. 2004 production was 3.4 billion gallons, far below that of gaso-line, but it’s a start.

In Canada, Suncor is constructing an ethanol production facility near Sarnia. Production, when up and running, is expected to reach 200 million liters of ethanol, distilled from 20 million bushels of locally-grown corn. In Ottawa, Iogen is operating a demonstration plant making cellulose ethanol, touted as the next generation of ethanol.

In September 2005, the Canadian Re-newable Fuels Association estimated the cost to produce a barrel of ethanol at $41, with oil running over $70. Increased production will lead to even lower ethanol costs. Th at fact alone should have the politicians jumping all over this idea.

Th ere are two types of ethanol being sold in the U.S. and Canada. E10, which is ten percent ethanol and 90 percent gasoline, can be used in most vehicles on the road today with little or no problems. Sunoco and independents like Pioneer in Canada are selling ethanol en-hanced fuel from pumps in many of its stations.

E85 is a mix of eighty fi ve percent ethanol and fi ft een per-cent gasoline. Currently it is only recommended for fl ex fuel vehicles (FFV) Most manufacturers have FFVs in their off erings. Th e prob-lem here is a lack of supply for E85. But it seems that Sunoco will be in a position to solve that problem.

Ethanol is a clean burning, high octane fuel. In fact 100% ethanol has an octane rating of between 110 and 113. When you run E10 you are actually raising the octane of gasoline by 2 to 3 points! It also burns cooler than gasoline. Th e Indy Racing League is switching over from methanol to ethanol. Th is year they will be running 10% ethanol, in 2007 they will have made the switch to 100% ethanol. If these racers can do it, so can the car manufacturers.

So why don’t we switch right away? Well fi rst there is not enough capacity to allow a complete switch-over. Also there are some dis-advantages that have to be dealt with, ethanol does not burn the same as gasoline and requires more powerful ignition systems. It is also takes more ethanol than gasoline to get where you want to go, requiring either more frequent fuel stops or a larger fuel tank. On pre-88 engines ethanol could corrode rubber and some metal parts. To successfully run ethanol in a pre-88 engine you would have to eliminate all the po-tential problem parts by replacing them with ones made from post-88 compounds.

What about my old car? How can I take advantage of the benefi ts to both the environ-ment and my pocketbook that ethanol off ers? Legally you can’t. To make the change you would have to have your vehicle certifi ed by the EPA in the US. Certifi cation cost would run $23,000. plus you would have to prove your vehicle could maintain low emissions for 50,000 miles. Th ese costs are far out of reach of the normal car owner. However this could change.

Once there is a wide availability of ethanol I suspect that the brains behind the performance aft ermarket would be capable of resolving these problems. Ethanol conversion kits would become available. Mr. Gasket would have ethanol friendly gaskets, there would be stainless steel gas lines and tanks and I’m sure that MSD or Mallory would be able to solve the ignition problems. Barry Grant, Edelbrock and Holley would bring out ethanol carbs.

Th ere are just too many benefi ts to continue to ignore ethanol. Its wide use will

lower greenhouse gas emissions, it would reduce our reliance on non renewable fossil fuels and remove the threat from the hands of middle east oil producers. Best of all it will help to rebuild our rural economies. Bye bye Osama, hello Corn Cob Bob.

Performance in Motion Publications 1100 The QueenswayToronto, ON M8Z 1P7Phone: 416-259-3678 • Fax: 416-259-6433

EDITOR/PUBLISHERCANADIAN ADVERTISINGBob [email protected]: 416-259-3678

U.S. ADVERTISINGDick Van [email protected]: 1-818-506-7773

PRODUCTION DESIGNRob [email protected]

CONTRIBUTORS Thomas AndrewsBob McJannettRobert MichaelsStephen MillerJeff NorwellStéphane RiouxLen SlyJoe TriciniKayvene with Bonnie Staring as the Reluctant Passenger

PROOFREADER“Spike” LaVigne

MOVING? Please let us know! E-mail both your old & new address to: [email protected]

Return undeliverables to: 1100 The Queensway Toronto, ON M8Z 1P7

PUBLICATIONS MAIL AGREEMENT NO. 40609642

PERFORMANCE IN MOTION is published six times a year: February, April, June, August, October and December. Circulation is 30,000+ (ISSN 1703-8421)

Contents copyright ©2006 and all rights reserved by Performance In Motion Publishing. The fine print: We respect your right to privacy, and do not sell our mailing list. This magazine may not be reprinted or duplicated without express permission of Performance In Motion Publishing. (We’re nice guys, just ask) All opinions are those of our writers, and some of whom have sniffed too much gasoline fumes. The information presented is from various sources from which there can be no responsibility by Performance In Motion Publishing as to legality, complete-ness and accuracy. Be good to the environment - recycle this magazine to a friend. I can’t believe you made it to the end.

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Cruising and Friendships Following the tragic loss of my loving wife

and cruising partner of 41 years, Merleen, the ‘Cruising’ community supported my family and I with distinction. These friendships, forged through the mutual passion and inter-est in our hobby, have made painful times tolerable. Members of the Canadian Street Rod Association, Back Alley Cruisers, Perfor-mance Improvements and, of course, BK Cruisers should all be commended for their loyalty, friendship and genuine caring during, and following, this tragedy. I am unable to thank you all enough.

A special couple, however, must be recog-nized both as true friends and examples of what truly epitomizes our hobby. The past seven months they have practically adopted me. They have supported me during my personal moments, helped me rebuild my life and, of course, my Hot Rod.

Alan and Phyllis White live near me in Port Credit. On numerous occasions Merleen and I would drive by their house and stop to see Al and Phyllis in their driveway admiring what I thought to be a “heap of scrap” on a car dolly. Al would look at me and say “what a beauty, eh?” His ability to see the beauty within is truly admirable.

If you don’t know Al and Phyllis, you may know their car. It is an absolutely flawless baby blue 1958 Chevrolet Convertible. This “driver” (no trailer queen here) was the Silver Medalist winner of the Cruise Nationals at the International Auto Show 2006.

This “heap of scrap” was built by Al in his one-bay garage and driveway, in Port Credit. Frustrated by an unwillingness to paint it by local shops, Al built a makeshift, plastic tent in his garage, complete with a fan and vent at either end. Al painted his own car in this tent and accomplished a finish to rival any profes-sional painter.

In closing, I would like to thank each and every one of you once again, and wish you a wonderful “Cruising” summer.

Sincerely,Wayne Scott

Performance in Motion Publications, 1100 The Queensway, Toronto, ON M8Z 1P7 CanadaFax: 416-259-6433 or E-mail: [email protected]

Letters may be edited for length, and all submissions become the property of Performance in Motion.

Letters

Wayne Scott credits cruising friends like Al and Phyllis White, with their baby blue 1958 Cheverolet Convertible (pictured), for helping him through the difficult times after his tragic Street Rod accident.

Letters to the Editor

8 June/July 2006 • P|M

Use a mix of less than 50/50 antifreeze and water. Plain water transfers more heat than anti-freeze. Unless it is -34 degrees where you live, you should be able to thin the mix. Try 70/30. Do not run plain water; the engine needs the inhibitors and corrosion preventing chemicals included in the antifreeze

Install a high pressure ra-diator cap. Increasing the pres-sure will give you a higher boiling point. Today’s radiators should accept caps as high as 22-24 PSI. Check with the radiator manufac-turer before changing the cap.

Install a high-flow thermo-stat. Look for a thermostat with larger openings, to allow the cool-ant to flow freely. Be sure you are using the recommended tempera-ture range, especially with com-puter-equipped vehicles.

Install an aluminum high performance water pump. If there is an aftermarket pump available for your engine, consider replacing your original pump. Today’s pumps are designed to provide maximum cooling at all engine speeds. Flow, pressure and distribution are all designed to provide maximum efficiency.

If your car was built with-out a recovery tank, install one. It will prevent air from enter-ing the cooling system, allowing coolant to flow from the radiator to the tank when the cap releases pressure. As the system cools, a vacuum is created and the over-flow will be returned to the ra-diator. Be sure that you are using a recovery-style cap that operates with both pressure and vacuum. Spectre offers a variety of these tanks in stainless steel.

Install an aftermarket tem-perature gauge. If your vehicle has only an “idiot” light, you need

a gauge to really know what is happening under the hood. Both Autometer and Stewart Warner have many styles to choose from.

Finally, check the fluid lev-els. A radiator that is half full may work okay on level ground with a minimum of stress, but in high heat situations or long grades the temperature can climb like a rocket.

You will be rewarded with a trouble-free driving season if your cooling system operates correctly. The time spent now will be re-turned to you many times in safe and comfortable driving.

Once you have an efficient radiator, there are a number of other tricks to ensure maximum cooling.

Warm weather means it is time to review the cooling sys-

tem on your vehicle. A little preventative maintenance will keep you from being on the side of the road with steam pouring out from your hood this summer.

One of the most important parts on your car is the radiator, assuming that your car is water-cooled. Your radiator is all that stands between you and serious engine dam-age. Should the radiator fail and the engine overheat, catastrophic damage can occur. Too often the radiator is taken for granted, seldom checked or maintained.

In the early years, automobile radiators were relatively simple devices built from either brass or copper tubing. As cars began to cre-ate higher and higher heat levels, the radiators cooling tubes were surrounded by fins designed to improve cooling capacity.

Radiators built for cars in the 40s thru 60s were heavy; to remove some of the weight, the manufacturers began experimenting with different rad core configurations and lighter materials. Some radiators were built with plas-tic tanks. Unfortunately, they reached a point where the ultralight rads would fail prema-turely. Today most cars come with light and strong aluminum radiators adequate for stock vehicles, if your engine produces more horse-power, or is used in heavy duty situations such as towing, the original radiator can leave a lot to be desired.

Modified cars produce higher horsepower and generate additional heat. To ensure your car “Keeps its cool,” you should consider add-ing a high-quality, high performance alumi-num radiator. These radiators offer increased

cooling through improved construction.Flex-a-lite, one of the leading manufactur-

ers of aftermarket cooling products, has added a line of unique aluminum radiators to their offerings. The new Flex-a-fit all aluminum radiators feature heavy duty side or top tanks fabricated from high strength extruded alumi-num incorporating both internal fins and T-shaped external fins that increase the radiant surface area by 300%. Cores are built around two rows of 1” tubes surrounded by aluminum cooling fins. These features provide superior heat transfer.

What makes the Flex-a-fit radia-tors even more unique is the mounting system. The T-shaped fins accommo-date any number of mounting scenarios.

Brackets are easily fabricated and attached. Electric fans, transmission coolers, ex-

pansion tanks and A/C evaporators are simple to mount using Flex-a-fit accessory brackets, or custom brackets you can create yourself. No holes to drill, no plastic spears punched through the rad core, nothing mounted from the core itself. When you see this mounting system, you will ask yourself why no one has thought of this before. It just plain works. No matter how difficult a radiator swap these Flex-a-fit radiators can be easily mounted using the T-fasteners provided.

Keep your Cool this summer!

Flex-a-fit crossflow radiators come in three sizes. With their unique mounting bracket-ry, your Flex-a-fit radiator can accommodate anything necessary to make a perfect cooling system.

Internal fins combined with unique T-shaped external fins

absorb heat from the coolant and increase radiant surface

area by 300%.

Story by: Thomas Andrews • Photos by: Robert Michaels

7 out of 8 of America’s top enginebuilders prefer Royal Purple*

*Find out why

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Visit royalpurple.com for details.

Call 866-769-3517 today for a free product catalog.

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If your car was built before the era of recovery tanks, install one. Spectre offers five sizes of

polished stainless steel over-flow tanks. Easy to install.

High-quality auxiliary temperature gauges are available from Autometer or Stewart Warner in either mechanical or electric.

Edelbrock super cooling aluminum water pumps provide maximum flow and pressure to ensure overheating is prevented during high stress situations.

Companies such as Mr. Gasket offer high flow thermostats that have larger than normal openings to allow the coolant to flow more freely.


Joe Kwakernaak’s 1959 Ford Skyliner, full steel fr ame, real sheet metal, heavy steel bumpers. Th is is a car you feel safe in!

So Fine ‘59


Story & Photos by: Bob McJannett

Period correct combination mirrors and spots, Coker wide whitewall tires, 100 spoke wire wheels with knockoffs, even fuzzy dice to keep that fifties flavour.

Under the hood, rests 332 cubic inches of original Ford V8 power.

Raising or lowering the massive top is an operation that takes over a minute to complete and usually attracts a crowd.

After years driving Corvettes, but want-ing to own a classic car, Joe Kwaker-naak finally bought one at the RM

Auction. After some spirited bidding, Joe went home with his prize: a 1959 Ford. His was not just any 59 Ford; it is a genuine Ford Skyliner with the very unusual retractable hardtop.

Joe is a tool and die designer by trade; this makes him a stickler for detail. Once home, he decided his Skyliner needed to be made perfect. Over the next couple of years with the help of his friends Jerry Zister and Ken Osburn, plus the guys at Klotz Auto Repair, the car was gone over completely. The engine, transmission and rear end were all redone. A new padded dash was installed, hood and deck lid insulation was replaced, and all new weather stripping and wind lace was installed. The body remains in the original factory Geranium and Colonial White colours.

To keep that fifties feeling, Joe hunted down all the period correct accessories, install-ing a continental kit (as if it wasn’t long enough already), matching combination mirror and spotlight assemblies, the flying ellipse hood ornament, front and rear bumperettes and the correct exhaust extensions at the rear.

With everything in tip-top shape by March 2005, Joe began to use his car for what he had bought it for. Weather permitting, Joe’s Skyliner attends cruise nights and car shows almost every evening during the season. After all, that’s what they are for!

From this angle, you realize just how big this car really is. Talk about fun to parallel park!


Joe Tricinci & Stéphane RiouxStory and Photography

While the 350Z is a nice enough car straight from the dealership, some of us believe there is no such

thing as too much power. It was for those people that APS created their twin-turbo kit. Installed without changing any of the internal components of the engine, it is best installed by a reputable shop. Even then it is a 40-hour job to complete.

Once installed, the 350Z becomes a supercar-killing sleeper. While still completely streetable, and innocuous sounding at idle, once the throttle is mashed the beast is released. Th e owner of this 350Z (name witheld by request) had to have his smile surgeically removed aft er blowing past a Porsche Carrera S.

As with the rest of the car, it’s diffi cult to see the stock exhaust. Everything forward of the cats went in the trash bin.

Th e kit includes an extra-large oil pan with turbo oil-drain tubes, and improved cooling fi ns.

Here is the unmolested 350Z engine bay, complete with AEM cold air intake. Th ings are going to get a little more crowded.

We start by removing the entire fr ont bum-per and rebar to make way for the massive intercooler and piping.

Steering shaft modifi cation ensures clear-ance between steering knuckle & turbo assembly.

Finished install shows the optional “test pipes” with invisible catalytic convertors.

350Z Intercooled Twin-Turbo


Here you can see the modification to the factory fuel & return lines. We also installed a custom heat shield to protect the lines.

Comparing the stock intake above to the new intake below - we can see the free-flowing up-per intake chamber allows boost pressure to enter the engine without any turbulence.

APS uses two internally wastegated, water-cooled Garrett twin ball bearing turbochargers, each capable of producing 400 horsepower.


Dual-inlet vertical-flow intercooler uses the latest in bar and plate technology. Allows the use of equal-length piping for the greatest pos-sible air temperature reduction with the lowest possible pressure loss with good throttle response.

The twin-turbo design greatly reduces “turbo lag.” Downside of the kit? All the new torque will produce tons of wheel spin and smoky burnouts as you leave the line!


Source: Next Level Automotive Ltd.43 Six Points Road, Etobicoke, ON416-259-6500

January 26,27,28, 2007The Automotive Building Exhibition Place, Toronto

RETURNIINg ToToRoNTo

foR

foosE2007

chIPovERhAUlIN’ Tv sTAR

for more info or registration visit416.462.0132 – [email protected]

produced by

speedorama showsPo Box 65103, RPo chester

Toronto, ontario, M4K 3Z2www.speedoramacarshows.com

$10,000$10,000“ThE dEAN”

$8000 plus added bonus of $1000 for the first time shown in Ontario and $1000 for the first time shown at Exhibition Place.

Th e turbos feed more air into the engine, so modifi cation to the fuel pump & sending unit is required to add more fuel as well.

An external fuel management was then installed to allow for more precise fuel control at higher engine loads.

As soon as it was fi nished the car was driven straight to the dyno!

350Z with an AEM CAI, headers and cat-back exhaust and pulled a respectable 248HP on the dyno.

Aft er the turbo install, that was boosted to 430HP (on a bad tank of gas) A second dyno run netted 467HP & 375TQ!


ACCEL’s Points Eliminator Kits put an end to high-maintenancePoints Ignition systems. By utilizing race proven electronicsand an infrared trigger signal, ignition timing is stable to 10,000 RPM.• This accurate ignition timing helps improve performance

and fuel efficiency• Easy to install with simple hand tools• Reduced maintenance – eliminates changing points forever• Thermal Clad based surface mount construction ensures

dependability and long lifePart #2010: 1957-74 GM V8 engines with ACDelco single and dual point distributorsPart #2020: 1957-74 Ford V8 engines with Motorcraft single point distributorsPart #2030: 1961-73 Chrysler/Dodge/Plymouth V8 engineswith Prestolite single point distributorsPart #2005: ACCEL Points Eliminator replacement module

IF YOU WANT THE LOOK OF A STOCKDISTRIBUTOR AND THE PERFORMANCEOF A RACE DISTRIBUTOR, USE AN ACCELPOINTS ELIMINATOR KIT!Perfect for vehicles that want to retain the look of a stock distributor and the reliability of anelectronic distributor.

Available now at Auto-Zone, Checker Auto Parts, Kragen Auto Parts, PepBoys Auto stores, Schuck’s Auto Supply as well as Summit, Jeg’s and hundreds of speed shops across the country.

ACCEL is a division of theMr. Gasket Performance GroupCleveland, Ohio

www.accel-ignition.com

ACCEL is a division of theMr. Gasket Performance GroupCleveland, Ohio


Poker runs are a fantastic opportunity to show off your boat’s performance.

Working from a small, well equipped, air-conditioned shop based in Orillia, John Manley has the advantage of doing just what he

likes to do. After working in the machine shop business since he was 14, honing his skills on all manner of projects, John and his wife Brenda started Performance Engine in 2000.

John’s business specializes in the building of top quality high-per-formance engines, while his target market is offshore poker-run boats, being located near water in Orillia helps.

Performance Engine is an authorized Mercury Mercruiser rebuilder, an accomplishment that took over eight months to earn. They also build engines for drag race and hot rod applica-tions.

John stays current with local racing requirements by building engines to fit a number of racing disciplines. One of his most suc-cessful engine customers has been a champion at his home track in the All Star stock car series.

These are not just any en-gines; Performance Engine builds engines capable of produc-ing 2,000 plus horsepower! They are also experts in supercharging, if you want real power increases, Performance Engine is a shop you should investigate.

Whenever he has time off, John gets to play with his 1978 Ford Futura that features Zephyr and Thunderbolt accents.

Story and Photography: Len Sly

Performance Engine Restoration Services9 Progress Drive, Unit 5, Orillia, ON.1-800-611-5770

helix 20”, 22”, 24”

kore 17”, 18”

collection06


Street & StripPerformance in One Coil!

Street & StripPerformance in One Coil!

AfterburnerAfterburnerAfterburner ™

Don’t compromise on a coil that isdesigned to work best on either thestreet or at the track any more! TheACCEL Afterburner™ Switchable Coilgives you the best of both worlds, atthe flip of a switch. Works either withthe stock vehicles inductive ignitionsystem or with an aftermarket CD ignition system.

Normal Mode:• Boosts low RPM performance for

enhanced throttle response, improvedeconomy and reduced emissions

Switched Mode:• Boosts higher RPM to better fire under

high cylinder pressures conditions, such as withnitrous or under boost

#140025 ACCEL is a divisionof the Mr. Gasket

Performance GroupCleveland, Ohio


This well equipped shop has everything necessary for top quality engine building.

High-performance cylinder head work is another Performance Engine specialty.


An animated fi lm featuring talking cars voiced by celebrities. Th e upcoming Pixar movie? No, it’s the latest documentary from Ca-

nadian fi lmmaker Ron Mann. “Tales from the Rat Fink” features Ed “Big Daddy” Roth’s automotive creations telling us their stories.

“Big Daddy” was the subject of the 1960 Tom Wolfe Essay on the custom-car movement “Th e Kandy-Kolored Tangerine-Flake Stream-line Baby.” Wolfe described Roth as “the Salvador Dali of the move-ment–a surrealist in his designs, a showman by temperament, a prank-ster.” He was a talented artist who helped inspire a generation to release their inner Fink.

Originally titled “Confessions of a Hot Roddin’, Pin Stripin’, Kus-tomizin’, Teenage Icon”, Mann’s largely animated documentary features the voice talents of John Goodman, Ann-Margret, Jay Leno, Brian Wil-son, Tom Wolfe, Matt Groening, Robert Williams, “Stone Cold” Steve Austin, Paul LeMat, Billy F. Gibbons, Alex Xydias, and Th e Smothers Brothers. Quite a cast!

John Goodman narrates “Tales of the Rat Fink” as the late Ed Roth, looking down from above on all his many offb� eat creations. His various vehicles are voiced by the aforementioned celebrities, telling their tales directly to the viewer.

Ron Mann’s fi lm was set to premiere this fall at the Toronto In-ternational Film Festival, with a general release in November 2006. At press time the rumour-mill has the fi lm premiering instead at Lead East at a massive Drive-In event. Perhaps in a double-bill with the summer Pixar fi lm? Could it be screened at a Barrie Drive-In in time for Can-Nats? Visit his websites below for the latest news and updates.

“Tales from the Rat Fink” is Rated F for Fink’s everywhere!

For more info on the Film:visit www.talesoftheratfi nk.comor www.sphinxproductions.com.

For more info on Ed Roth:visit www.ratfi nk.org or wait for our upcoming Rat Fink Issue!

John Goodman provides the voice of “Big Daddy” in Ron Mann’s animated documentary “Tales of the Rat Fink.”

Story by:Rob McJannett

• Machined fi ller necks & furnace-brazed water tanks eliminate two prime sources of leakage• The lightweight 1” tubes, arranged in two rows, off er excellent cooling

Available for Ford & GM in 22”, 24”, 26”, 28”, and 31” widths Most only $299

Performance Improvements SALE • June/July 2006 19

Performance for your Cooling SystemWill reduce operating temperature to increase horsepower and is ideal for racing applications. Also lubricates water pump seals.

onlyPJ12510$15

JUNE-JULY SALE SIZZLING SAVINGS ON COOL PARTS!

Beat the summer heat!

High Flow ThermostatsAvailable in 160º, 180º, or 195º temps for Ford, Dodge and GM engines.

GA2661from only

$15

$229Starting fromED8811

“Super Cooling” water pumps provide maximum fl ow, and pressure. Features include:• Aircraft industry clearances• Heavy-duty 3/4” bearings• Billet steel hubs

Victor Series Water Pump

$359

Twice the fans, Twice the FLOW!Dual Electric Fans

FX220 Starting from

Twin kits complete with shroud, & optional controls. Perfect for high performance cars and trucks!

Keep your cool this summer!

Aff.ordable.aluminum.radiators.for.Street.Machines.and.Race.Cars

ALUMINUMRADIATORS

Standard Auxillary Fans

$89Heavy Duty Auxillary Fans

$139FX392 from

PF212 from

Both fan styles available in 12”, 14” or 16” and include all mounting hardware!

$349FX150 from

Replace your mechanical fan to free up horsepower! Xtreme Electric Fan Conversions Built-in shroud, includes thermostatic controller, moves 3,300CFM

Replace your clogged and corroded water neck with a NEW Chrome water neck!

$15

Reduces coolant temperature!

most popular V8 applications

available for

20 June/July 2006 • Performance Improvements SALE

• Replaces OEM Filter & Air Box• Air Filter is Washable & Reusable• Easy bolt-on Installation!

FIPK IntakeUpgrade to a

KN57-3022-2 only

14HPBolt on

• Chassis dyno proven to add 8-25 horsepower• Installs in 10-15 minutes using hand tools• Cold Air Tuning with aftermarket intakes

GM350111C..................94-97.LT1.Camaro...........$525GM350112C..................98-02.LS1.Camaro...........$525

Granatelli MotorSportsMass AirflowSensor

Finally a high-quality Cap and Rotor kit and Billet distributors for the LT-1!

MD8481........................Cap.and.Rotor.Kits...........$189MD8381........................Billet.Distributors............$549

BM45051........83-03.Camaro/Firebird.5-Speed....$275BM45052........93-03.Camaro/Firebird.6-Speed....$275

Sport Shifters

$275

Improve the art of driving.• Shift throw reduced 30% for quicker shifts• One-piece stainless steel stick• 6061-T6 Billet aluminum base• Direct bolt on installation

CAMARO / FIREBIRDFeatured Parts

17”

4 - Fast Z06 17” rims mounted & balanced on

275/40R17 tires

Upgrade to Chrome only $380 more!

$2,159

18HPBolt on

98-02 5.7L - LS1 Camaro/Firebird

93-97 5.7L - LT1 Camaro/Firebird

$275

$425

ED5204 ...........Lower Trailing Arms......................$299ED5280...........Torque Arm...................................$249ED5202...........Panhard Rod.................................$159

15% off!

60%Airflow increase!

• Adds 12-25 HP over the factory manifold!• Standard 85mm throttle body opening• Flows about 15% better than Z06 manifold• Made from lightweight 356 aluminum

BB5004...... 98-04.LS1.INTAKE.MANIFOLD............$549BB5006...... INTAKE.&.80MM.THROTTLE.BODY.......$889

LS1 - SSI Intake Manifold

Throttle Bodies available for many Vehicles!

Designed with high-performance in mind, they are made from superior materials in the quality you have come to expect from MSD.

FalkenZE512

MD8381

MD8481

• 93-97 LT1 Camaro/Firebird

• 98-03 LS1 Camaro/Firebird

Edelbrock suspension componentsALL are on SALE!

KN57-3010-1 only

18” and 19” Diameters

available in

All B&M Manual Shiftersare on Sale!

Manufactured with the latest technology and the most durable materials, Edelbrock products are designed and tested to give your vehicle the best handling performance.

Suspension Components

ADJUSTABLEAGX shocks and struts have manual adjustable dampening, which makes it completely adjustable while still on-the-car.

HIGH-PERFORMANCEWith its competition grade engineering & construction, AGX® Sport Adjustable Shocks and Struts are perfect for auto enthusiasts and high performance drivers.

Performance Improvements SALE • June/July 2006 21

TRUCK & SUVHeadquarters

your

DRY BLADE $20 OC20014

CAR DUSTER $27

Micro-Fibre cloth is the latest in cleaning technology!

WASH MITT$15 OC22012

CHROME STAINLESS ULTIMATE BULLBARS

$549

Protect.the.front.end.of.your.truck.or.SUV.with.these.Westin.3”.diameter.chrome.plated,.stainless.steel.bull.bars..Skid.plates.are.lightly.brushed.stainless.

Custom designed for each model truck.32-1170 .........CHEV/GMC PU/SUV 00-06 .......... $54932-1200 .........DODGE RAM PU 03-05 ............... $54932-1390 .........FORD F150 04-06 ...................... $549

and up!

INTAKE SYSTEMS

BedXtender

$349

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22 June/July 2006 • Performance Improvements SALE

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15”

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BRAMPTON 905-453-990112 Rutherford Rd. S.M - F 10am - 9pmSat 10am - 5pm

GUELPH 519-821-6740672 Woolwich St.M - T 10am - 6pmW - F 10am - 9pmSat 10am - 5pm

HAMILTON 905-574-6940891 Upper JamesM - T 10am - 6pmW - F 10am - 9pmSat 10am - 5pm

LAVAL 450-688-45363236 Boul. St. Martin OM - W 9am - 5pmT - F 9am - 9pmSat 10am - 5pm

NEWMARKET 905-954 -1630180 Davis Drive (Hwy 9)M - T 10am - 6pmW - F 10am - 9pmSat 10am - 5pm

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PIERREFONDS 514-626-18664909 Boul. St. Charles M - W 10am - 6pmT - F 10am - 9pmSat 10am - 5pm

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TORONTO 416-259-96561100 the QueenswayM - F 9am - 9pmSat 10am - 5pmOPEN SUNDAY 12-5!

Prices are valid from June 1 until July 31, 2006. Please.be.aware.that.descriptive,.typographic.or.photographic.errors.

sometimes.occur.and.are.subject.to.correction..We.reserve.the.right.to.limit.quantities..

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Josef Benedik likes to build cars, and he has a fondness

for unusual transportation. In October 2002, we featured his completely home-built 5.0 litre Ford-powered roadster. Here is what resides in the other side of his garage.

In the late 1960s, Ford was on the lookout for an Ital-ian exotic car manufacturer. Having been rebuffed by Fer-rari, they turned their atten-

tion to DeTomaso, who at the time was about to bring out the mid-engined Pantera. In 1969 Ford decided to partner with the company and bought a good piece of it. Their plan was to import the unitized-bodied Pantera for the North American market. Cars began to arrive at US ports in 1971. Over the next four years, these cars were plagued with minor problems. Ford, instead of

finding solutions, abandoned the project in 1974. Owners unwilling to give up on these reasonably priced exotics, (after all they sold for a mere $10-12,000 at the same time Ferraris were twice the price) were easily finding solutions to the problems and enjoying their cars.

In 2002, Josef came across his Pantera. Over the next two years, he went through the car

ensuring that everything was up to snuff and adding his own personal touches.

Since 2004, this Pantera has led the good life, travel-ling to cruise nights and car events where it attracts a lot of attention. Josef ’s only com-plaint “It’s too fast.” Some problem, eh!

The rear view is the one most often seen by the competition. Speeds in excess of 160 miles an hour were clocked on test cars when they were first brought to North America.

Four-barrel equipped Ford 351C engine breathes easy thanks to a K&N XStream Air Flow Top.

Attached to the engine is a ZF synchronized 5-speed trans-axle.

The pop-riveted fender flares were factory installed and do a great job keeping the debris from the 50 series tires where it is supposed to be.Story & Photos by: Len Sly

PANTERA


John Waldie’s Stratford Motor Products is a GM dealership with a strong interest in the car enthusiast. As well as being one of only a

few authorized GM Performance Parts Dealers, they have sponsored a number of local racers, most recently Scott Steckly and at one time were involved in NHRA pro stock racing.

Every year to thank local enthusiasts for their business, John, Ger-ry, Rob and Don clear out the dealership lot to make room for their annual SMP cruise night. Cars start to arrive around 4:30 and stay till the sun goes down. There are door prizes, music and a BBQ. Last year’s event provided a chance to help out the local chapter of Big Brothers; the more sausages you ate, the more the Big Brothers were rewarded.

This is one of those great small events we try to get to every year. There are lots of interesting cars of all types plus you meet some great people. If you’d like to see for yourself, this year’s cruise is scheduled for Wednesday, Aug 16. Come and see the cars, eat some barbequed sausage, and this year help support the “off to school smiling” program that supplies a backpack full of school supplies for underprivileged kids. We hope to see you there. Info:

Stratford Motor Products www.stratfordmotorproductsgmcanada.com

StratfordCruise

All types of cars attend the SMP Cruise. This Camaro drag car had everyone’s attention as he drove on the lot.

Lowered suspension and chopped top combine to give this Chevy pickup a great stance.

This little Ford coupe sits right and has “The Look.”

Here is a nice contrast. An original 1927 Chevrolet parked beside a much modified Model T roadster.

Story by: Robert Michaels • Photos by: Thomas Andrews

Steering Solutions

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A wide variety of cars show up, something to suit every taste.

The line-up for sausage kept the cooking crew hopping.

How about a yellow Ford Prefect with fuel-injected Chevrolet power?

What are the odds of finding two Dodge A100s at the same event? Drop a Hemi in the back, and you’ve got a wheelstander.

Here is what it takes to install Hedman Hedders on a Camaro from 1982 through 1992. All of the parts shown are required to keep the emission systems operational, including retaining of the A.I.R. pump.


In the late 60s, pollution component systems became a part of your new

automobile. Air pumps, oxygen sensors, electronic carbs, catalytic con-verters, and computer controls, all became front runners in federal at-tempts to reduce the amount of unpleasant emissions flowing from the tailpipes of our vehicles.

The advent of all of these controls caused the doomsayers to predict the demise of the high performance industry. No one would be able to install any of the parts we had become familiar with, since they would no longer accept the pollution components that had been mandated onto the engine.

The performance industry, however, has always been able to rise to a challenge, after all, what they do best is to create products that improve the performance of the OE part. Before you could change four tires at a NASCAR race, the R&D departments from the leading manufactur-ers were burning the midnight oil to find solutions that would allow for all the new components, while still enhancing performance. The two segments that seemed to face the most obstacles were the header and intake companies. Both re-sponded beautifully.

Header manufacturers had to deal with air pumps, oxygen sensors and catalytic converters. To see just how they approached these problems, we spoke with Ron Funfar, current president of Hedman Hedders. Ron noted that by the 70s the Hedman family felt the header market was doomed; in fact, they felt so strongly about it they sold their business. However, working with SEMA, some of the Hedman people began the long arduous process of creating a com-pliant product. Numerous meet-ings were held with the California

Air Research Board, ultimately ending up with the creation of tubular headers that were legal for sale in the State of California. By 1974, the Hedmans bought back their business.

Hedman Hedders, now owned by Bob Vandergriff, has mastered all the problems. In fact, in their latest catalogue, on page 13, they list all the different exemptions that have been earned, an impressive list. Headers are manufactured to meet all today’s requirements, oxygen sen-sors are accommodated, and no pollution devices are removed or by-passed. Check out our photos of the latest offerings from Hedman to see just how far headers have come.

At the other end of the engine, Edelbrock was designing and build-ing intake manifolds that would accept whatever devices the OE’s required. Their line of 50-state legal intakes allows the enthusiast to install the performance enhancing parts they want, without running afoul of emission regulations. Edelbrock offers intakes for both V8

domestic and four-cylinder sport compact engines, both carbureted and fuel-injected.

But, we are in Canada, what does 50-state legal mean to me? So far the powers that be are accept-ing parts that meet the US regula-tions in Canada. Hopefully, that remains true in the future.

So here we are, thirty-five years later, the performance in-dustry is booming. Headers and intakes are better than they ever were, offering improved perfor-mance and fuel efficiency, while caring for the environment.

In the 60s NHRA used the slogan “Ingenuity in Action” - no-where is this more apparent than with these industry-leading com-panies. Without their efforts, the doomsayers’ predictions might have come true.

Story by: Thomas Andrews • Photos by: Robert Michaels

Were increased emissions requirements the death knell of the performance industry? Not so far!

Now, upgrade youroutdated points or stockelectronic distributor with a performance-provendistributor that features thepatented Ignitor II electronic ignition

module and a CNC machined 6061 T-6polished billet housing and deck. Apowerful micro controller allows the IgnitorII module to adjust dwell angle to maintainpeak energy throughout the entire RPMrange, increasing both high and low RPMperformance.*Also for Ford and Mopar

A new ignitionupgrade for small and bigblock Chevys*,from PerTronix.

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Flame-Thrower II. Our very hot0.6 ohm, 45,000 volt, lowresistance, performance coil.

You’ll only realize the full potential of acoil this hot with a sophisticated electronictriggering mechanism like Ignitor II(above). While this coil is compatible withmost capacitive discharge boxes, includingthe popular MSD 6 or 7 series, it wasspecifically engineered for our Ignitor IIelectronic ignition. This lethal combinationaverages 4 times more available energybetween 3000 and 5000 RPM compared tostock points.

See your dealer or call toll-free.

Bring some juice to the party!



By the 90s, the OEMs had a better handle on emissions. This is all that is required to install Hedman Hedders on a 92 through 96 4.0 V6 Ford Explorer.

Moving to current models, a late model 2005/06 Mustang 4.6L simply requires a pair of these tubular headers to improve perfor-mance, while still meeting all emission regulations.

This type of intake is a street legal replacement for a carburetor equipped V8 engine. These are available for most domestic engine families.

Electronic fuel-injection equipped engines have not been forgotten. Edelbrock offers high performance replacements for the factory intakes.

Sport compact enthusiasts can replace their stock intake with one of the Edelbrock long ram units for increased horsepower.

Throttle bodies are available in a multiple of sizes to fit the needs of your engine, no matter what state of tune it is in.

Taylor wires deliver high voltage performance for maximum fire power!

Visit our web site for more detailed information:

TaylorVertex.com1-800-915-9473

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Just as a good foundation is necessary for the construction of a quality building, so is good

ignition the foundation of good fuel economy. A couple of fundamental points are necessary to understand proper ignition.

First, rich mixtures ignite easier and burn quicker than lean mixtures. Rich mixtures occur at wide-open throttle (WOT) and un-der heavy loads (such as pulling a trailer or driving up hills). Second, dense mixtures in the cylinder (which occur at or near WOT) burn quicker than sparse mixtures (also called “weak” mixtures that occur under part throt-tle conditions).

Combining these fundamentals results in the realization that “rich, dense” mixtures burn very quickly and do not require as much ignition advance as “lean, sparse” mixtures. In other words, your engine requires much more spark advance (from the distributor) dur-ing part throttle operation than during a full throttle drag run or when it is required to pull a heavy load on hills.

To get the proper ignition timing, mod-ern vehicles use a sophisticated computer sys-tem with inputs from “mass airfl ow” sensors (MAF), “manifold absolute pressure” sensors (MAP) and “vehicle speed” sensors (VSS), supplemented by the “coolant temperature” sensor (CTS) and others.

Older vehicles used a “mechanical advance” system (consisting of weights operating against springs) to compensate for engine speed, and a “vacuum advance” system (consisting of a

vacuum diaphragm that moved the breaker plate) to compensate for engine load. Good fuel economy requires ignition advance to be determined by both engine speed (mechanical advance) and engine load (vacuum advance)!

Over the years, performance enthusiasts have felt that somehow vacuum advance was a detriment to performance. Nothing could be further from the truth because at WOT there is no engine vacuum, and the vacuum advance does not work (all vacuum advance systems since the early 60s used manifold vacuum or its variant, ported vacuum). Some people even stated that they could

“curve” a mechanical advance distributor to work like a “vacuum advance” equipped dis-tributor. Th at is totally impossible.

For the performance enthusiast with a con-ventional distributor, operating with both the mechanical advance and the vacuum advance will provide more fuel economy without sac-rifi cing any performance. As a matter of fact, the engine will run cooler because the extra advance at part throttle will fi re the lean mix-ture earlier so that it burns at the piston dwell point at TDC. Without the vacuum advance, the timing is retarded, and the piston is on its way down the hole exposing the cylinder walls to the heat of combustion and overheating the engine!

If you have a car with a conventional igni-tion, hook up that vacuum advance to save gas and have a cooler running machine!


Source:CRANE CAMSwww.cranecams.com

Ignition is the Foundation of Good Fuel Economy

If you have a car with a conventional ignition, hook up that vacuum advance to save gas and

have a cooler running machine!

Adjustable vacuum advance kits are complete with adjustable vacuum canister, featuring the unique adjustable vacuum diaphragm, three sets of advance weight springs, and a 3/32” Allen wrench, plus complete instructions for installation and operation.

Th e adjustability provided by these kits permits you to run the maximum ignition advance throughout the RPM range, with-

out encountering detonation. Improved performance, effi ciency and dependabil-ity are the major benefi ts obtained. Once the kit is installed, you can also quickly compensate for changes in fuel quality and altitude.

Running a street performance engine? You need vacuum advance!

Story by: Robert Michaels


New Product Showcase


BARRY GRANT - SixShooter has been made available as a multi-carburetor/air clean-er kit to suit all Ford FE-series engines from 332 to 428 cubic inches (1958 to 1976). By coupling a Six-Shooter to an original intake manifold, (not included), this combination is ideal for Ford-powered hot rods and custom rods. With carbs turned rearwards (like the originals) to clear the distributor, this triple two-barrel induction system is beautifully craft ed, nostalgic in appearance, and easy to install and tune. Featuring just three adjust-ment screws—no synchronization needed, the SixShooter will match and even outperform today’s best single four-barrel combinations. Th e SixShooter comprises three 250-cfm two-barrel carbs (choke on center unit), a polished Rush Performance air cleaner, and all the necessary fuel inlets and throttle link-ages, including a special right-side crossover mechanism.

[*An original Ford intake manifold is required.]

BELLTECH - Th is Belltech lowering spindle for the 1997-2003 F-150 features a full two-inch drop, while retaining full suspension travel, geometry and alignment.

BAER - Isn’t it about time for new brake rotors on your pickup or SUV? Want a really cool look behind those open-spoke billet rollers? Baer Brake Systems’ DecelaRotor OE-replacement rotors are now available for ‘04 and newer Ford F-150’s, ’02 and newer Hummer H2’s and ’02-’04 Dodge Ram pick-ups, in addition to most other popular trucks and SUVs.

Designed with ease of installation, perfor-mance and aff ordability in mind. Dece-laRotors™ are covered by an unprecedented three-year limited warranty against warpage and cracking.

MR. GASKET - Micro-electric fuel pumps are compatible with all fuels and additives. Built from solid-state, worry free, electronic components for long life, these pumps will eliminate vapour lock and fl ooding. Th ey also work well as a fuel transfer pump and make a great stand-alone or booster pump. Th is is a self-priming pump with simple two-wire design. It works on 12 Volt negative ground systems only. Each pump includes fi ttings and mounting hardware along with easy to follow instructions. Part No. 12S Specs: 4 - 7 PSI, 35 GPH. Universal design for most 4 , 6 , and 8 cylinder carburetor applications.

BELLTECH - Complete Lowering Kits 2”-3” for Colorado and Canyon. Belltech’s new complete kits include: new front strut coil set; a new redesigned aluminium extruded lower-ing block set and your choice of Belltech s Nitro-Drop or Nitro-Active rear gas shock absorbers.


Business Directory

COMP CAMS - New Xtreme Energy Retro-Fit Hydraulic Roller Cams For Big, Small and Hemi Chryslers

Latest hydraulic roller technology advancements incorporated for more power and torque from three classic Chrysler engine platformsWith a legacy of performance dating back beyond the classic muscle car era, Chrysler engines have historically been a favourite choice of hot rod enthusiasts and racers. Now COMP Cams has developed a new line of camshaft s to introduce the newest valve train technology to three popular Chrysler engine platforms. Engineered specifi cally for the unique induction requirements of these engines and exten-sively tested, the new Xtreme Energy Retro-Fit Hydraulic Roller Camshaft s utilize modern “fast ramp” hydraulic roller lobe technol-ogy to dramatically increase the horsepower and drivability of these three classic Chrysler engines. Th e result from the driver’s seat is a very noticeable performance (horsepower and torque) increase and drastically improved throttle response. When used with COMP’s new Pro Magnum Chrysler Retro-Fit Hydraulic Roller lift ers, these totally new camshaft designs deliver the ultimate valvetrain perfor-mance upgrade, without sacrifi cing long-term durability.

HOLLEY - Carb Installation Kits.Do you have a carb to install, but not the necessary hard-ware? Holley has solved that problem with the new Carb installation Kit. Th is kit contains all the hardware necessary for most installations of a new 4 bbl Carburetor: mounting studs (including an extra long one for securing throttle cable / kickdown cable brackets), washers, nuts, air cleaner stud, vacuum caps, three diff erent throttle cable balls, bushing adapter for large hole of throttle lever, air cleaner gasket and base gaskets for square and spread bore carbs. Fits virtually all makes and models of 4 bbl square and spread bore carburetors. HO20-124.

At long last, deserving Canadian participants in the motorcycle sport will now be rec-ognized in the Canadian Motorcycle

Hall of Fame Museum (CMHM). Th e CMHM is sponsored by the International Motor-cycle Supershow, and its head honcho, Bar Hodgson.

Beginning in 2006, twelve indi-viduals or entities will be installed in the CMHM. “We have a broad cross section of Canadian Motorcycling achievement in the group,” says Bar Hodgson. “We had many deserving nominations from all across the coun-try representing all types of motorcycling activities, paring them down to just twelve was a challenge. Now, we have an inventory of nominees with more coming in all the time. Future growth appears assured.”


Canadian Motorcycle Association60 years as Canada’s National

Sanctioning Body.

Jim Bentley - Mississauga, ON Founder of the Ride For Sight.

Trevor Deely - Vancouver, BC Competitor, Importer & Contributor

to Canadian Motorcycling.

Don Munroe - Halifax, NS Multiple Canadian Road Racing

Champion.

Ray Gref - Montreal, PQ Competitor, Dealer and Contributor

to Motorcycling in Canada.

John Nelson - Belleville, ON Competitor, Dealer and Co-Founder of

Shannonville Motorsports Park.

Welland County M/C - Welland, ON Celebrating 60 years of Racing and

Contribution.

Stan Bradbury - St Catherines, ON Competitor, the Father of Speedway

Racing in Canada.

Gerry Marshall - Pointe Claire, PQ Competitor, Offi cial and Contributor.

Blair Sharpless - Whitby, ON Competitor, Multi-Champion

Off -Road Racer.

Walt Healy - Calgary, AB Competitor, Dealer and Contributor.

Lang Hindle - Uxbridge, ON Competitor, Road-Racing Champion,

Aft ermarket Manufacturer.

Seated on the left , Steve Davies (MCC), to his left Bar Hodgson (CMHM), witnessed by Peter Sheppard (MCC) and David Lloyd (CMHM).

Signing the agreement between the Motorcyclist Confederation of Canada (MCC) and the Canadian Motorcycle Hall of Fame Museum (CMHM) making the MCC a founding patron of the Hall of Fame.

2006 Hall of Fame Inductees

Visit the SEMA enthusiast Web site:

www.enjoythedrive.com


Auto Services Ltd.

60 Bullock Dr. Unit #8Markham, ON L3P 2P2

Doug LambP• 905-471-3335F• 905-471-7274C• 647-228-3434

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Performance Business Directory

If you are working on your vehicle and want it to look its best, eventually you will be faced with refi nishing the sheet metal.

If you haven’t had anything like this done in recent years, you will be surprised at the cost. Th e chemicals and pigments required to do a good job are no longer inexpensive. A good quality paint job, from a reputable shop, will run you in excess of $5,000. Show quality will easily double that cost.

Author Pat Ganahl is one of the most knowl-edgeable writers in the hot rod and custom car fi eld. Pat has been a long-time proponent of the “Do it Yourself ” school. If you are willing to try a project like this, then you need to get this book.

In 128 pages, Pat presents all the secrets of doing a good job at home. Lavishly illustrated with over 400 colour photos, the tips provided

will easily save you the cost of the book. No matter if you want a simple “scuff and squirt” or a full on, lets-paint-everything paint job, this book will help eliminate mistakes.

Th ese pages contain far more than just painting tips, however. Chapters detailing what equipment is necessary and the current types of paint products on the market, will assure the reader knows and understands just what they should expect. Th ere are also two chapters on taking your paint job to the next level. Complete details on the science of colour sanding and polishing that, if followed, will guarantee your vehicle will turn heads wher-ever you are.

- Bob McJannett

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There comes a time when your loved one will experience unexpected difficulty in the basic ritual of starting his ride. Anything can happen to the vehicle that was safely tucked away in storage over the winter months or in scattered pieces on the garage floor.

In these situations, there is usually audible confirmation of the situation: a starter motor grinding, a door slam or an angry shout. Some passengers have heard a keening wail not un-like the introductory notes of The Immigrant Song by Led Zeppelin. Either way, you’ll know it when you hear it.

Before it gets to that dreaded stage how-ever, there are some “failure to launch” warn-ings to watch for:

Off-season strike: If he’s spent more time on the couch than in a crouch next to his coveted automobile, chances are his baby will find a way to pay him back. In spades.

Heavy metal: Scraping, pounding, snap-ping… anything that could be misinterpreted as the sounds of an argument between Thor and Odin points to trouble ahead.

An unresponsive gauge: Or a light sud-denly not working. These little things can quickly lead to an electrical or mechanical ad-venture that requires exploded diagrams and Haynes manuals.

Backorder: This single word can bring the strongest automotive nut to his knees—unless there’s a scrap yard nearby.

Even if none of these indicators appear, the rod gods can sill wreak havoc on the un-suspecting owner. This isn’t a case where fol-lowing a strict maintenance program involv-ing tune-ups, fluid checks and prayer will offer him any more protection than the guy who had his pride and joy sitting in the back forty all winter long.

Life isn’t fair, and the life of an automo-tive enthusiast may appear even less so at the best of times. Add in the high price of gas, mind-numbing Ministry of Transport regu-lations and storm clouds on a drive and shine day—and we’re left to deal with one unhappy camper. Let’s just say the rod gods are doing everything in their power to ensure that our role as the sane member of the team is even more…fun.

So you should always be prepared. Here are some tips:

Alternate means of transportationAs the car will normally refuse to budge

on the way to an event, it’s best to have back-up wheels. Or call a cab.

A way to lure him out of the drivewaySome enthusiasts will not want to leave

the side of their ailing ride. So have a plan to get him back into the house—whether its woo-ing him with food, a televised game or a call from Publishers Clearing House.

Arrange a lifelineGet the numbers of some of his knowl-

edgeable car nut friends and keep them handy. Hopefully one of them can talk him through the problem or encourage him to call in the professionals.

Leave him beLet him work through his pain, whether

he’s sitting quietly in the garage, screaming at passers-by or tinkering with a wire or engine part.

Before you head off to the mall, you may want to leave a drink and sandwich for him on the porch. Or not.

During this difficult time, it’s best not to remind our loved ones of the times they said they were going to have that doohickey looked at or take the ride into the shop. Heck, you may just want to take any mention of the idle item out of the conversation altogether.

Don’t worry, it’ll all work out somehow. It always does at our place.

About the Author: Bonnie Staring is a comedian, advertising copywriter, coupon-user, and a baker of unusual things. www.weirdbonnie.com.

Illustration by Kayvenewww.kayvene.com.

by Bonnie Staring

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June July 2006 - Performance in Motion