Supporting the Mallee HOG Chapter

On the Cover: Just Chillin' - on the Darling

January 2014 Edition: MHC #1401 – FC

The Directors Report

Keith's Klaptrap Hi all,

First up, I welcome all to a new year. I trust everyone survived the festive season well and got to

catch up with family n friends.

I haven’t been able to get to the bike since the last report, so for my part I have nothing to report on

past ride activities. I am looking forward to the Oz day weekend ride. Hopefully it won’t be 45

degrees, like last week. Tony is renowned for organising great weekend get-aways and I am sure this

will be up there with the best of them. Unfortunately for me I am currently sporting a broken thumb

on my throttle hand, so some modifications to the cast may need to be made.

The Rally committee held a meeting in early January with a very good turn up of members. These

meetings will intensify from now on, as we are now only 7 weeks from the rally. Registrations will

now be closed and it looks like we will end up with between 3 and 4 hundred attending.

This month's thought: The road is eternal and the wind constant. Sharmo

From the Editor:

Hey!

Greetings, from all the hardworking staff down here at Route Headquarters.

That'd be me! Not as many rides featured this month, as it's been so hot I guess but there's

plenty coming up. Our best reporters are off on the Oz Day Ride and we'll cover the

Charlton Redback event too. Being held at a similar time to last year's Cambrai rally and

sounding much the same I am assured it will in fact, be different. Look for reports and

pics on both of those events in next month's newsletter.

See you out there! -Ed malleehogeditor@gmail.com

FOR SALE: Ute Canopy. Fits Falcons, XD-XG. Best Offer. Ph. 0447210899

The Activities Report

BOOTHY's BANTER

Well, Happy New Year to everyone and I hope the festive season was good to you all.

To top it off, the heat has crept up on us and it's possibly too hot to ride during the day but

early mornings are still good, if you're keen.

It was good to see a few heads still battle out the heat on the social sip this month and a

good little pub hop it was, dodging the warmth.

The Oz Day ride with Tony has a good number of people going and there's possibly still

room for more. If you are looking for a ride and a weekend away I can tell you the area they are going to is God’s country, well

worth a ride through there. If you are interested, contact Tony on 0408 500877. He might still be able to slot you in. (one spot left at

time of printing - Ed) For the Members who are not going there is an Oz day brekkie ride marked on the calendar and we are up for

suggestions as to where to go, for breakfast and a ride. This will be decided on the Friday night prior and contact is Jack McCarthy.

If interested on a nice brekkie and a ride to celebrate Australia Day, let Jack know.

The Red Back Rally in Charlton is fast approaching on the 8th of February and for those asking about it there will be a name list at

Hangar to put your name on and it will be camping or swag. Details are still to come on whatever will be arranged for trip. Keep

your eye on the Weekly Bulletin for those.

A Trivia night with Softy (hair cutter) Barber is on the 21st Feb, so make sure you put that one on your bucket list, as the will to win

is getting stronger amongst the clan. (And the prizes are getting bigger - Softy)

We are also looking for help with the rally packs on Saturday the 15th

of Feb, to put them all together. So all hands on deck for this.

Also, we need help with jobs at the rally. We all know the more help we get the less we all have to do, so if you are available contact

the rally committee, or check the list at the Hangar and put your name in the column that may suit. We will also need approximately

32 corner marshals for the thunder run, so put you names forward for that too.

Also, Quick Fix has the 2014 range of demo bikes in until the rally, so if your keen on looking at the new range or in the market for

a new bike, talk to Gavin and the team at Quick Fix and I’m sure they will sought something out.

Enjoy your Australia Day, however you are going to spend it and I will see you out there. Cheers, BOOTHY.

Ph. 0408230088 or email malleehogactivities@gmail.com

Heads Up …… what’s around the bend?

JAN 25-27 Australia Day Ride to the Yarra Ranges! Report in next issue.

FEB 8-9 Redback Rally Overnighter – in Charlton - watch weekly bulletin for details.

MARCH 7-10 Victorian HOG Rally in Mildura!

MAY 2-4 National HOG Rally is in Cairns. National Rally Registration is open.

Our Chapter ride plans and group leaving times, available soon.

# The latest info on upcoming rides and events can also be found on our updated website.

Go to www.quick-fix.com.au and click on the Mallee Chapter icon in the bottom right corner.

# Details of events are often finalised late, so keep your eye on the Bulletin for leave times, back up vehicles and

other details.

Mallee HOG's New Years Eve camp, on the Darling River

Muzza's Mutterings The Membership Report

G'day to all Mallee HOG Members.

There is not a lot to report on new memberships for this month but I hope everyone had a good Christmas and New Year. With membership payments, there are still a few outstanding members that have not paid. As we are half way through our year, could you please let me know if you still want to be a member.

At the moment there are 141 full members and 16 associate members. This is our highest membership level in 22 years! If there are any members that are not getting texts about rides, which are happening most weekends, please let me know so we can make sure that ever one knows what is on. Anyhow, that is it from me. I hope to see you on Friday nights at the club room if not out on the road. Cheers, Muzza

A TRUE HOG MAN

He booked himself on a Caribbean cruise and proceeded to have the time of his life. That is, until the ship

sank! He soon found himself on an island with no other people, no supplies, nothing; only bananas and

coconuts. After about eleven months, he is lying on the beach one day when the most gorgeous woman he

has ever seen rows ashore. In disbelief he asks, "Where did you come from? How did you get here?" She

replies, "I rowed over from the other side of the island where I had landed when my fishing boat sank."

"Amazing," he notes. "You were really lucky to have a row boat wash up with you." "Oh, this thing?"

explains the woman, "I made it out of some raw material I found on the island. The oars were whittled

from tree branches. I wove the bottom from palm leaves and the sides and stern I carved from tree

trunks. "But where did you get the tools?" "Oh, that was no problem," replies the woman. On the south

side of the island, a very unusual stratum of alluvial rock is exposed. I found that if I fired it to a certain

temperature, in a volcanic vent I had found just down island, it melted into ductile iron and I used that to

make tools and used those tools to make the hardware." The guy is stunned. "Let's row over to my

place," she says, "and I'll give you a tour." So, after a short time of rowing, she soon docks the boat at a

small hand-built wharf. As the man looks to shore, he nearly falls off the boat. Before him is a long stone

walk leading to a cabin and a tree house. While the woman ties up the boat with an expertly woven hemp

rope, the man can only stare ahead, dumb struck. As they walk into the house she says casually, "It's not

much but I call it home. Please sit down." "Would you like a drink?" "No, thank you," the man blurts

out, still dazed."I can't take another drop of coconut juice." "Oh, it's not coconut juice," winks the

woman. "I have a still out the back. Would you like a bourbon, neat?" Trying to hide his continued

amazement, the man accepts and they sit on her couch to talk. After they exchange their individual

survival stories, the woman announces, "I'm going to slip into something more comfortable. Would you

like to take a shower and shave? There's a razor in the bathroom cabinet upstairs." No longer

questioning anything, the man goes upstairs into the bathroom. There, in the cabinet is a razor made

from a piece of turtle bone. Two shells hone to a hollow ground edge are fastened on to its end in a swivel

mechanism. "This woman is amazing," he muses. "What's next?" When he returns, she greets him

wearing nothing but a bandana around her blonde locks and some small flowers on tiny vines, each

strategically positioned. She smells faintly of coconut oil and beckons for him to sit down next to her.

"Tell me," she begins, suggestively, slithering closer to him, "We've both been out here a long time. You

must have been lonely. When was the last time you had a really good ride?" She stares into his eyes. He

can't believe what he's hearing. "You mean ..." he swallows excitedly as tears start to form in his eyes,

"You've built a Harley?"

'On the Darling' – Dec 31, 2013

National Rally goers - Special Meeting in the Hangar, Friday Jan 31st

. To plan departures, groups etc.

Road captains need to know when we are leaving to book accommodation, plan fuel stops etc. along the way.

Come along Friday night Jan 31 and we'll work it all out on the night.

The "Eat the Winnings" ride!

The ROUTES calendar…. February 2014

Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

1 Social Sip 1 pm

and then

Dinner at the Crazy Mexican

at 7.30pm

2

3 4 5 6 7 8 9

Committee Meeting

Hangar Open

7.30PM

Charlton Redbacks

Overnighter Details via bulletin

10 11 12 13 14 15 16

Lunch Rides usually leave

Q-Fix at 11AM. Check weekly

bulletin for updates.

Themed General Meeting

7.30

17 18 19 20 21 22 23

BBQ +

Trivia Night 7pm >

In the Hangar

Lunch Ride Leaves Q-Fix

At 11 am

24 25 26 27 28

Social Night In the Hangar

from 7.30

Your 'Weekly Bulletin' is the best place to keep up with recent

changes to the calendar

The ROUTES calendar…. March 2014 Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat Sun

31

1

2

3 4 5 6 7 8 9 Committee Meeting

Set Up Rally Site – all hands on

deck! Hangar Open

7.30PM

OUR Victorian State

HOG Rally

Rally continues

10 11 12 13 14 15 16

Rally concludes PACK UP and

Clean UP! All hands on

deck!

General Meeting 7.30PM

17 18 19 20 21 22 23

Hangar Open 7.30 pm

Post Rally 'ride, recuperation +

dinner' day. Details soon!

24 25 26 27 28 29 30 Leave times, destinations etc; will be updated via our Weekly Bulletins

Social Night Hangar Open

7.30PM

If undeliverable, please return to:

Mallee HOG Chapter

PO Box 2657

Mildura 3502